beep beep lettuce

Your friendly local burnt out human person | occasionally I post pictures of my lizard

[roughentumble]

my friend just told me that there's a secret second dashboard that solely contains posts from people you've turned on post notifications for, and when i click the link in the messages it opens it within the tumblr app, so the tumblr app also has a secret second dashboard for post notification blogs, and the only way to access it is to open the link for it within the app.

i literally love tumblr

[nightpool]

i have a private pinned post that just has a link to this dashboard on it, it's great. two dashboards for life

[cyle]

wow! i was really hoping someone would organically reverse-engineer this and find that dash.

here are a few other "secret" dashboards:

Posts from your "crushes"

"What you missed" (will be empty if you already visit Tumblr every day)

"Trending"

these are all just taking existing feeds of content and putting them in a dashboard-like format... the "Stuff for you" tab/feed is the same idea.

[ruimtetijd]

[blurrymango]

I swear if the link in the original post is a virus I'll be so upset.

[ruimtetijd]

nope! i hovered over the link and this popped up on the bottom of the browser. here's all the links in order:

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/blog_subscriptions

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/crushes

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/what_you_missed

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/trending

https://www.tumblr.com/timeline/for_you

[no-one-offical]

‎

[briannyssey]

Oh easy mistake. Yearning actually rises from the floor and longing hangs from the ceiling

[briannyssey]

🥺🥺

[json-derulo]

I love lying to my landlord. “We’re currently looking at a comparable unit in the area at $[a hundred dollars less than our current rent]/month, so if your offer has any flexibility to come down on the rent, that would help us reach a decision about whether or not to renew our lease here” and the comparable unit exists only in my own beautiful mind

[json-derulo]

Actually, no! And since several people have replied asked for my script for negotiating lower rent, I’m gonna share that below, as well as the philosophy behind it. Full disclosure that I’m not a leasing office person or a realtor or god forbid, a landlord—I’m just someone who has been a renter for 10+ years across different states, and I know for a fact that I have saved myself thousands of dollars by successfully negotiating a lower monthly rent on almost every lease I’ve ever signed. (Also, I’ve only ever rented in the U.S., so this advice may not be as applicable elsewhere.)

Step 0: Know Thy Enemy

The key thing to understand about all residential landlords, whether they’re corporate conglomerates or Just Some Asshole, is that their asset—the property—is a Cinderella carriage that magically turns back into an expensive ass pumpkin of a liability any time it’s sitting empty. The property taxes, insurance, mortgage, HOA fees, and maintenance costs all still come due every month/quarter/year whether they have a tenant to cover it all and then some, or not. 

Because of this, at the end of the day, their ultimate goal is to fill every unit at all times with someone who will reliably pay the rent on time and in full. And because everything else is secondary to that goal—and because with the exception of Just Some Asshole landlords, the person responding to your emails and writing up your lease paperwork is several degrees of separation removed from the shareholders who profit off your rent money—they’re almost always willing to negotiate with you. As long as it gets the liability converted into an asset faster or keeps the carriage from turning back into a pumpkin for longer, then in the long run, it’s actually in their best interest to give you a better price. 

Step 1: Identify Your Leverage

If you understand how supply and demand works, you can figure out how much leverage you have pretty easily.  High supply and low demand = you have more leverage, and vice versa. Do they have an “AVAILABLE NOW - MOVE IN TODAY” sandwich board on the sidewalk or a web banner that says “First month free”? Does their website and/or Apartments.com show a bunch of currently open listings? Do you already live there and know at least two families on your floor have moved out in the last several months with no one new moving in to replace them? These are all indications that they have more than one unit currently sitting empty, meaning higher supply and lower demand. No sandwich board and a website that just says “call for availability”? They might just suck at marketing, but more likely, supply is lower and demand is higher. 

You have the least leverage if you’re a prospective tenant looking to move in somewhere that has a waitlist. They have no reason to offer you a discount if six other people are already in line to pay full price for apartments that aren’t even vacant yet (but you can still ask!). You also have no leverage to negotiate if you’ve already signed a lease and you’re in the middle of the lease period; you legally agreed to pay $X/month for Y months, so you’re stuck with that until the lease is up.

At the other end of the spectrum, you have the most leverage if you’re a current tenant who has always paid your rent on time and you’re being offered a renewal on your existing lease with higher rent than you're currently paying, especially if they already have some units that have been empty for a while. If you move out, not only is your unit going to sit vacant for at least part of a month, they’re also probably going to have to put in some work to “turn” the unit (repainting, professional cleaning, etc) to get it in move-in condition for the next tenant.

All of this means that if you move out, even if they can fleece you out of your security deposit and find a new tenant the very next month, it’s still gonna cost them at least a few thousand dollars to turn that pumpkin back into a carriage again. They’re probably willing to come down by $100-$200/month or so on the renewal offer rent if you ask, because they know it’ll actually save them money in the long run. Similar situation if you’re a prospective new tenant—if they can’t get you or anyone else to sign a lease and move in this month, that’s $[whatever the monthly rent is] down the drain, and they’ll never get it back. It’s a perishable item about to spoil. 

Step 2: Get Their Opening Offer

This is the first number they’ll quote you for the rent—the sticker price that you’ve always just accepted as set in stone. The truth is, they’ve built some buffer into that number. There’s almost always some room for them to come down, and depending on your leverage, they will if you ask nicely. But for reasons that baffle me, most people don’t!

Step 3: Wait, Research, & Counter

Don’t reply to their initial offer right away—unless there’s a waitlist (in which case, you have little haggling power anyway), wait a few days. It makes them sweat a bit, and it shows you aren’t desperate. The person who is rushing to reply is not the one who has more leverage in the negotiation, and making them wait reminds them of that. In the meantime, use Apartments.com or Zillow to get an idea of what similar units in the same area are currently going for. Then you come up with your counteroffer.

As a general rule, anything more than about 20-25% below their opening offer (or below market rates) will probably just piss them off or make them take you less seriously. But when we’re talking about your monthly rent over the course of a year or two, even a 10% discount adds up to a lot of money!

When I negotiated our original lease for my current place, I also asked for and got a two year lease term instead of the standard one year. But whatever automated calendar event system they use to remind their leasing office staff when it’s time to send out renewal offers didn’t get the memo about that, so they mistakenly sent me a renewal offer the following year, meaning I got to see how much they would have jacked up the rent if they could’ve. For that second year of the lease alone, my negotiating saved us $3,000! 

Step 4: BDE (Big Dick Emailing) 

Here’s the tricky part. You need to write an email—always negotiate over email if you can, it’s too easy for a salesperson to bowl you over on the phone and anything they say that isn’t in writing means nothing—which simultaneously makes it sound like you would sign a lease with them in a heartbeat and like you are actively flirting with five other apartment complexes right now who all want you so bad it makes them look stupid, because you are just so sexy and fun and your credit score is eight inches flaccid. You need to make them believe you are both highly motivated and ready to sign on the dotted line and willing to just walk away from the table at any second, but if they could just come down a little bit on that number, you’d delete those other hoes’ numbers forever! Here’s the rough script I use every time:

“ Thank you for [your email/the tour/sending over the offer letter/etc]. I have had a chance to review and consider it. I think [name of apartment complex] would be the perfect fit for me, but I am also exploring and touring other options in the area, including a comparable unit nearby at $[a little below your counteroffer number]/month.

If we could come down to $[your counteroffer number]/month on the rent, I would be prepared to sign the lease today. Let me know your thoughts. Thanks! "

Step 6: You Win Either Way

Sometimes they really do just accept your counteroffer without question and send you over a revised lease to sign. (When this happens, I make a note for next time that my counteroffer was probably too high and I should’ve asked for more!) More often, they get approval from The Powers That Be and come back with a number that’s higher than your counteroffer but lower than their initial offer. Assuming I can afford it, I always accept this offer; you’ve achieved your goal of saving yourself money from sticker price, and they’re likely to lose patience if they have to keep going around and around with you. And sometimes (though only very rarely), they may come back and say the price is firm—in which case, guess what? You still didn’t lose anything by asking!

[json-derulo]

THIS!!! Exactly this. I didn’t mention it above because I just couldn’t fit it neatly anywhere, but once while negotiating a lease renewal, I got as far as receiving their counteroffer, which was basically “price firm :(”, but then life happened, so I forgot to respond and accept. The email sat in my inbox for a week. And then, completely unprompted, they magically replied again saying, “actually, nvm, how’s $[number that is lower than our opening offer] sound?”

To them, it looked like I was staring them down cold as ice like

I was literally just busy with other stuff! and they were sweating!!! BULLETS!!!

[genericnbbuddy]

I hope this doesn't goes viral (in the sense of a TikTok w/+1M views with this post read aloud and some Minecraft Parkour at the background). Like seriously, if it does, landlords gonna notice it and it'll stop working anymore (or even worse, suing people who followed this advice on masse, including OP)

[artemissoftstepper]

need a bad sleep reset

this is a very delicate operation which involves not falling asleep until the late enough tomorrow that i can get a normal nights sleep

[voxelfoxkae]

[beemovieerotica]

please vote for tylenol to have her face on a beer can $1 for 1 vote and the donation goes to the baltimore animal rescue and care shelter

[achilles-in-his-tent]

LET'S GOOOOOOO

[beemovieerotica]

TYHEADS WE DID IT 💯💫💪🗣👏💅🙏💘😈🤪🥰

[achilles-in-his-tent]

NOO !!!!

[achilles-in-his-tent]

Back where she belongs. The people's princess

[myfairynuffstuff]

Erika Toliusis (b.1969) - Pacific Angel. 2022. Oil with palette knife on canvas.

[sunshinetheinspiration]

@teaboot

[teaboot]

Painted with a FUCKING PALETTE KNIFE?

[herpsandbirds]

a blog for my two favorite categories of animal. Anyway can you tell me about microhylid frogs? I love them

Narrowmouth Frogs (family Microhylidae)

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ASKING ME ABOUT MY FAVORITE FAMILY OF FROGS!!!

Most of the members of this family feed on termites and ants.

The typical body plan is round with a small (sometimes pointy) mouth/snout.

Found on every continent, except for Antarctica (which has no amphibians).

In the superfamily Ranoidea (with tree frogs, true frogs, rain frogs, and many others)

Live in a wide variety of places, burrowing, arboreal, surface dwelling.

Most species have aquatic eggs with a typical tadpole-froglet life cycle, but there are species that lay eggs underground or in moist environments and go through the tadpole stage in the egg (hatching out as fully formed froglets).

Most Microhylid tadpoles are different than other anuran (frogs and toads) tadpoles, in that they lack a horny beak or "teeth". They do not feed on algae and other aquatic vegetation like most other tadpoles, but instead feed on detritus and small aquatic invertebbrates.

AND NOW... SOME OF MY FAVORITE MICROHYLIDS!!!

Muller’s Termite Frog (Dermatonotus muelleri), family Microhylidae, found in Argentina, Bolivia, Brazil, and Paraguay

Lives beneath the ground.

Feeds mainly on termites.

photograph by Dick Bartlett 

Burmese Squat Frog (Glyphoglossus guttulatus), family Microhylidae, Viet Nam

photographs by Diệp Tùng

Madagascar Tomato Frog (Dyscophus antongilii), family Microhylidae, Madagascar

photograph via: mongabay.com & boogerbear4g

Blunt-headed Burrowing Frog (Glyphoglossus molossus), family Microhylidae, Thailand

photograph by Rushen & Don Injabok

Dotted Humming Frog (Chiasmocleis ventrimaculata), family Microhylidae

- The 2 species occur together in Peru, Ecuador, Colombia, and Venezuela.

This relationship is sometime framed as “Tarantula with a pet frog”

This is thought to be a symbiotic relationship, probably mutualistic.

The frog lives in the female tarantula’s burrow, feeding on prey leftovers and ants (which would harm the eggs or spiderlings).

This is very specific to these species, as this species of tarantula will attack and prey on similar species of frog.

photographs by Emanuele Biggi

Red Banded Rubber Frog (Phrynomantis bifasciatus), family Microhylidae, Simunye, Swatini, South Africa

photograph by Tyrone Ping

Red Rubber Frogs aka Accra Snake-necked Frogs (Phrynomantis microps), in amplexus (mating Embrace), family Microhylidae, Pendjari National Park, Benin

photograph by Mark Oliver Rodel

Western or Great Plains Narrowmouth Frog (Gastrophryne olivacea), female, family Microhylidae, West TX, USA

photograph by Roadtripmonster

Northern Sheep Frog (Hypopachus variolosus), family Microhylidae, Costa Rica

photograph by Diego Ugalde

Malagasay Rainbow Burrowing Frog (Scaphiophryne gottlebei), family Microhylidae, Isalo National Park, Madagascar

photograph by Bill Love cowyeow | Flickr

Peeping Whistling Frog aka Whistling Land Frog (Austrochaperina fryi), family Microhylidae, northern Australia

photograph by Jesse’s Wildlife

Indian Black Narrowmouth Frog aka “Space Frog” (Melanobatrachus indicus), family Microhylidae, Munnar, Kerala, India

photographs by Hadlee Renjith 

[herpsandbirds]

i posted some loggerhead shrike images in a server and they kept getting called CUTE !! the butcherbird enclave cannot stand for this... i request your FIERCEST loggerhead shrikes...

HAVE A LOOK AT THESE VICIOUS DIABOLOCAL BUTCHER BIRDS!!!

Loggerhead Shrike (Lanius ludovicianus), family Laniidae, order Passeriformes, FL, USA

photograph by Jeffery Gemmon

Loggerhead Shrike (Lanius ludovicianus), family Laniidae, order Passeriformes, Florida Atlantic University, Boca Raton, FL, USA

photograph by Jay Paredes

Loggerhead Shrike (Lanius ludovicianus) feed the baby a TASTY MOLE CRICKET!!!, family Laniidae, order Passeriformes, FL, USA

photograph by Phil Rathner

Loggerhead Shrike (Lanius ludovicianus), family Laniidae, order Passeriformes, Arizona, USA

photograph by Aaron Marshall

Loggerhead Shrike (Lanius ludovicianus), EAT A TASY SNAKE!!!, family Laniidae, order Passeriformes, WA, USA

photograph by Christopher Clark

[depsidase]

[hungwy]

I want Kalshi to die

[depsidase]

[sycamorality]

oh no i will lose my !

[vintagewildlife]

"I can't believe humans would hunt the thylacine to extinction, humans are fundamentally evil" Hey, did you know that extinction was long thought to be impossible, and within 50 years of humans realizing that extinction via overhunting was a possibility it practically stopped happening? Did you know that humans are so desperate to prevent more losses that they're funneling millions of collective hours and billions of euros into helping other species? Hours and euros that could be spent on humans, and species on whom humanity's own survival does not depend? Did you know that due to an accidental introduction of rats, the Lord Howe Island stick insect population was brought down to 24 individuals and now there are tens of thousands of them?

This bug. This bug that, to most humans, is utterly useless, relatively gross, and completely foreign. Humans saved it because humans do not want to cause another extinction ever again if they can avoid it.

[untimelytophat]

@crabussy

[crabussy]

as someone in the field of ecological conservation, I can promise without a shadow of a doubt that people DO care. SO MANY people care.

I have to race to sign up to volunteer trips because even with dozens of spots available, people rush to devote their unpaid free time to helping the environment. these trips often fill up within hours. people care.

you will see a lot of bad news because that is the kind of news that people pay the most attention to. I know this more than you'd think from my optimism- not only do I live somewhere facing some of the most extreme ecological issues on the planet, I also spend my time studying the Bad Stuff every single day.

to see all of this firsthand and stay hopeful is proof enough that there IS hope. I promise there is good news, brilliant news, all the time. it's just less visible. but it's no less important or impactful.

[evilwizard]

attention acolytes! in order to maximize shareholder value, i will be turning all of you into gold statues, frozen in twisted spasms of pain for all eternity, in a great and lifeless mausoleum. we expect to eke out a marginal gain in Q3

[brainscrems]

And how does this increase shareholder value O Great and Powerful Dark One?

[nerathul]

Obviously we can add the statues to our assets while also cutting down on employee expenses.

[brainscrems]

I see! This sounds like a sustainable business practice and I have no further questions.

[evilwizard]

yes! im so good at Company

[montereybayaquarium]

Harmful changes to Endangered Species Act

Now, more changes to the Endangered Species Act by the current administration continue to attack crucial parts of the law to protect habitat and newly listed species.

These changes prioritize harmful development over science-based management and make it harder to put species on a path to recovery.

A healthy marine ecosystem is essential to support biodiversity and save endangered species. We need an Endangered Species Act and management guided by science and expertise that puts the environment first.

Sign up for ocean action emails to learn more about what you can do to support endangered species:

Sign up for ocean action emails

Get the latest ocean news, sustainable living tips, and simple ways to take action for a healthier ocean.

And read our statement here:

Monterey Bay Aquarium denounces Trump-Vance administration weakening…

New regulations undo core elements crucial for protecting vulnerable species and their habitats.

[coffeedragonart]

On Wednesdays, the library closes to the public a little early. Tea is set out and the lights are dimmed to make it more comfortable.

Nobody minds the more exotic patrons, as long as the books are re-shelved correctly 📚

-

Came a long way from the initial idea. I like where it landed. Trying to catch that storybook vibe again.

[stickyfrogs]

Jens Bravely protects Betty and Round Frog from Spray Bottle Nemesis!