Blood loss? No I know exactly where it is
will byers stan first human second
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
wallacepolsom
Three Goblin Art
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸

Andulka

Love Begins
Monterey Bay Aquarium
đŞź
NASA

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styofa doing anything
taylor price

titsay

izzy's playlists!
we're not kids anymore.

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hello vonnie
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Aqua Utopiaď˝ćľˇăŽĺşă§č¨ćśăç´Ąă
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@rainbowbridges
Blood loss? No I know exactly where it is
and i don't necessarily believe any of this i'm just saying words recreationally
the last sentence of my thesis
steadily recognizing that iâm allowed to exist in public spaces and not feel embarrassed about it⌠can you believe i used to feel weird about/too inadequate to sit on a bench in a public space. itâs ok. youâre allowed to be. just be. just sit on a bench. itâs ok
The trick to getting to this point is to just think of yourself as an extra in a movie.
I used to be so self conscious about existing in public but Iâve slowly realized that if I just saw some random fat guy in the background of a movie I probably wouldnât even think about him.
This is why Iâve come to describing myself as just some guy. Iâm just some guy! Nobody gets mad at just some guy for reading a nutrition label in the grocery store. Heâs just some dude. Heâs a part of The Public. The Masses. The Customers. Thatâs what this place was made for!
"magical fey shapeshifter surrounded by regular animals" is by far my favorite cartoon saloon trope
This is the funniest fucking addition anyone has ever made on one of my posts. Everyone else go home
Follow up:
Facts are facts. @ladycloud @esmesqualor-not-esmecullen
Machineries of Empire is likewise excellent with One (1) inexplicable Space Texan
anyway! the banana bread vendor at the farmers market is called "better than sex" but this year they changed it to "almost better than sex" which means the bread is just worse this year or girlie got some good dick since last summer
The American justice system when rich and famous people are tried
I love this, though, because my favorite thing about Superman is he isnât Batman. I love Batman too, but Superman isnât a dude who decided to live his life in pursuit of a vendetta against society when he was eight and then just did nothing for the next two decades but get super jacked, become the worldâs greatest detective, and memorize every strategy used by every winner in every field of competition in history. Superman is a very good-hearted person who knows how to bale hay, use AP Stylebook, and break meteors into manageable bite-sized pieces by hitting them real hard. And Iâm not saying Superman isnât smart. Heâs a bright guy, heâs just not like, one of the celebrated geniuses of the DC Universe. The best thing about Superman is he is basically a normal dude who happens to be orders of magnitude stronger than anyone else. Normal dudes have brain farts. Normal dudes are presented with a life-or-death situation they have less than four seconds to resolve and make a decision that is not optimal. Normal dudes arenât typically asked to rescue a child from a 10,000 ton machine bearing down on him at 85mph, but if they were, they would probably sometimes panic a little and do dumb shit like ruin a train when they could have just whisked the child to safety.
I think sometimes Superman makes the wrong decision, not necessarily to the result of extreme catastrophe, but something like this, where everyone is standing around clapping and cheering and the kidâs parents are weeping in gratitude and they want to pose for a picture for the 6 oâ clock news with Superman and the conductor, and in the crowd someone is like âWhy didnât he fly the kid out of the way?â and rather than rolling with the fact that the emperor is naked his friend just says âShut up, Drew, itâs Superman.â
And then, because I also love Batman for very different reasons, I imagine that later on the same day Bruce Wayne gets a phone call and Clark Kent is like âHey, Wayne, I uh, need a favor.â
âDo you now.â
âYeah, I, uh, kind of owe the Union Pacific Railroad $60,000.â
âOh, and whyâs that?â
âCome on, donât do this to me. It was all over the news.â
âIâm prepared to write you a no-strings-attached check for the full amount on the condition that you explain your entire thought process from beginning to end.â
Anyway, thatâs why I like Superman.
I think this is very accurate. One time a tree fell on me in the forest and while it would have made more sense to simply jump to the side and avoid it my idiot brain went through the fight-or-flight options and apparently chose fight, so I reached out my hand and caught the tree, then dropped it on the ground beside me. Ended up fracturing my wrist and wondering why the fuck my brain thought that was the best option for survival. I donât think people are good at really weighing the optimal choices in moments of crisis.Â
Bruce: âNew Justice League policy. I am willing to pay for whatever damages you guys do in the name of justice and saving lives, but you have to write up a report detailing how the damage occured, including your thought process. Every once in a while, I will complie them into a presentation that we will go through as a whole to determine how you could have mitigated the collateral damage.â
Clark: âThis is going to be a âname and shameâ type of thing, isnât it?â
Bruce, lying through his teeth: âOf course not, donât be ridiculous. This is to improve ourselves.â
The ones who admit âI donât know what happened hereâ get a pass on shaming but they still get the alternative suggestions list
And on nights when he really needs a break, Bruce pulls those presentations out, watches the video, and laughs his tits off.
Bruces âDad sensesâ are tingling đ
Quarantine with the batfam
Theyâre not allowed to get interviewed anymore
There were some excellent responses, so.. part 2
You Canât Escape.
and thus a legacy was born
stop everything, this is bitty doing research for his thesis
thereâs more lmao, unhinged bitty energy
I showed this tiktok to my grandma to make her laugh, but now sheâs all excited and actually wants to make a chocolate potato cake. Weâre gonna do it.
Iâll keep everyone posted.
Itâs happening, folks!
Looks good, but weâre not done yet!
Our sweet, sweet child needs to cool before we add the finishing touches!
My creation is complete!
After dinner, weâll give it a taste test!
I wonder how itâll taste.
OhâŚ
MyâŚ
God.
Itâs incredible!
This stupid cake, made with potatoes ⌠is delicious! Itâs so sweet, moist, and decadent, just like a brownie! And I donât even like chocolate or potatoes!
The recipe from the tiktok was pretty much impossible to find. I looked high and low, but everyone posted recipes that I KNOW he didnât use because the ingredients and methods were different. After some searching, my grandma and I came up with our own recipe.
For the Cake:
1 cup mashed potato
2 cups sour cream
1 ž cup flour
1 ž cup sugar
ž cup unsweetened cocoa powder
½ cup softened butter
2 eggs
1 ½ tsp baking soda
1 tsp vanilla
Pinch of salt
For the Drizzle:
4 oz semi-sweet chocolate
½ cup sugar
3 tbsp corn syrup
2 tbsp water
A lot of recipes called for a mixer or a processor, but my grandma and I wanted to make an every-man kind of recipe, since we know not everyone has those things. Plus theyâre heavy and a pain to clean anyway, so bowls it is!
Instructions:
1. Peel and boil the potato, then mash it. Set aside to cool. Go to the bathroom, do your homework, then come back. That should be enough time.
2. Set oven to 350°F.
3. Cream butter. This means putting the sugar and butter into a bowl and mashing it together with a fork until itâs thoroughly mixed.
3. Put everything else in the same bowl, including the mashed potato. Mix and stir well. Work those muscles!
4. Grease a pan (doesnât matter what kind you use) and spatula batter into pan. Even out if necessary.
5. Bake in oven for 40 minutes.
6. Test cake with pick. If nothing sticks, itâs finished. If batter does stick to pick, let it bake a bit longer but make sure it doesnât burn. Remove and set aside to cool.
For the Drizzle:
1. Cut chocolate into tiny squares.
2. In a small pot, mix sugar, corn syrup, and water.
3. On medium heat, wait for mixture to sizzle and stir it. Do NOT let it boil.
4. Remove from element and add chocolate.
5. Wait for squares to melt, then mix.
6. Drizzle or pour over cake.
Enjoy!
Iâm so glad thereâs a recipe now, I really want to try this!
Hey here is a thing that happened. We went for a simple ganache for the glaze. Heated 1 cup of cream till hot then poured over 1 cup of semisweet and 1 cup of milk chocolate chips. Whisk untill melted and pour over your chocolate mash potato cake
Found the original recipe! (Apparently it was listed as a caramel potato cake in the original recipe book??? Anyway, now thereâs two CPC recipes!)
Chocolate Potato Cake
½ cup butter 1 cup sugar 2 eggs ½ cup milk ½ cup hot riced potatoes [just pure potato, mashed, no milk or butter or pepper or salt or whatever, just pure mashed potato] 1 cup flour 2 tsp baking powder ½ tsp cinnamon ½ tsp clove ½ tsp nutmeg ½ cup grated chocolate ½ cup chopped nut meats [optional, never ever feel pressured to add nuts to your chocolate cake, our guy here didnât!]
Just⌠put everything into the mixing bowl in that order, with lots of mixing in between each addition.
Into a greased and/or lined tin, and then into a moderate oven for 55 minutes (or until cooked).
Frosting
2 Tbs butter 1 cup sugar Ÿ cup milk 1 square unsweetened chocolate ½ tsp vanilla [also optional, since again, not mentioned by our maker here!]
Boil, but be careful it doesnât burn. âŚBasically? Stir constantly! (also, apparently the vanilla only gets added after the mix is taken off the heatâŚ)
He did a long-form! He explained the steps!
this passes the bechdel test
i was gonna say âbut they donât have names!â but they do. the blondeâs name is dumb thotticus and the brunetteâs name is m-seq
strong contender for post of the decade
do you think the dc universe has a news site like the onion thatâs just likeâŚ
âmeddling parents still alive, preventing bruce wayne from adopting yet anther orphanâ
ânew study shows that 87% of all americans class superman as american citizen despite being born on a different planet, but only 49% avoided eye contact when asked about why martian manhunter doesnât countâ
âarea woman thanking her lucky stars that batman and superman fell out on the same day she was due to go to bossâ nieceâs bat mitzvahâ
âarkham guard astonished by trip to iron heights, only now learning what locks are forâ
âarea man pretty sure he should be making more than $60k a year if his boss has 10 billion dollars to waste on robotic exosuitâ
âbreaking news: lex luthor sues superman for loss of earnings, claims that continually losing fights to him is negatively affecting his work ethicâ
âHub City mayor declares state of unemergency after two hours without a violent crimeâ
âgrown man who dresses in halloween costume every night thinks clown his biggest problemâ
âdisappointed child realizes Booster Gold at birthday party the real one, not just a guy in a costumeâ
âdrunk Aquaman rampages through âPirates of the Caribbeanâ rideâ
ânew Teen Titan not attached to any Justice League member wonders why theyâve been issued a uniform with a red shirtâ
âEarth totally not a tax haven, say Green Lantern Corps as they assign eighth lantern to same planetâ
ââno one knows how to stop himâ says armed police officer as non-powered clown-themed supervillain begins 82nd massacre this yearâ
Clark.
Clark wrote all of these, you canât change my mind.
Bruce is exasperated but thinks some are funny and does nothing, nothing at all to stop it, even tells the press some are close to the truth.