I love the Good Omens 'Night at Crowley's Flat' trope where after stopping the apocalypse in season 1, they go to Crowley's Flat and talk and kiss and fall in love and have a peaceful night, I do.
What if the night became 'The Night an Angel and a Demon Get Insanely Drunk and Teach Each Other How to Act'
They go to the flat, and ALL they know is they are going to have to swap themselves if they want to survive and finally be free from Heaven and Hell
But they have absolutely NO clue how to pull it off successfully
Sure, they know each other in and out.
Aziraphale has Crowley's eye color committed to memory (and also to paper, since Aziraphale spent 4-5 years in the late 80s trying to find a craft store in London that could help him do the color justice)
Crowley could find his angel in a crowd of millions (and not even just because only one single person in that crowd would be dressed in that ridiculous shade of tartan)
BUT they know they have to truly get this right, down to the exact detail.
So, naturally, they start by promptly opening the closest bottle of scotch that Crowley had available
Crowley was convinced this would be the easiest thing they've ever done
"Only you, Angel, would find a way to worry yourself to death AFTER stopping an apocalypse"
They begin with the easy part, switching corporations and clothing.
It was easy. Until Aziraphale realized he had to actually physically move in the very, very tight pants Crowley prefers.
The first three times he tries walking, he falls face down. And each time, realizes how it's equally hard to get back up again.
Not to mention that Crowley's corporation had learned that after 6000 years, it didn't really need all those vertebrae and bones since he never used them anyways
So now Aziraphale is just laying on the floor in terribly tight pants, very confused on how Crowley has managed all this time
(Crowley is also on the floor, having dropped there laughing after the 2nd attempt)
After they both get up (one much faster than the other) Crowley tries coaching the angel on how to walk like him
Until Crowley realizes he doesn't actually know how he walks, he just sort of wills himself forward and hopes his limbs keep up with him along the way
Eventually, after enough drinks, they settle on a technique called "Just pretend all your limbs are snakes. And you're a snake. Honestly, just as snake-y as you can manage, Angel."
Aziraphale, as difficult as this was for him, figures out that he may have gotten the easy side of this situation here. Crowley very much disagrees.
"Once an Angel, well, definitely not always an Angel, but close enough right?"
He very quickly realizes he may be wrong when Aziraphale asks Crowley to copy his walk
"Dear Lord Crowley, it cannot be that hard. You simply have to walk in a straight line"
Crowley has all his vertebrae now, but no knowledge of how they should be used
He tries to hold his hands behind his back and march forward, walking in what he thinks is probably, on some plane of reality, maybe a straight line
He's convinced that he's the perfect image of a stereotypical angel, head held high, an air of 'holier than thou' surrounding him
When Crowley asks Aziraphale, he only says, "Well, I suppose it will have to do for now."
Internally, Aziraphale thinks of the fact that Crowley looked identical to a bumbling penguin walking on ice.
When Crowly sits down, very pleased with himself for an impeccable performance ("As always, Angel. I've still got it." Aziraphale uncaps the vodka and drinks straight from the bottle, just staring into the distance.
He has just realized that their existence hinges on whether Crowley can figure out how to sit on a chair like a proper being with appendages and a spine.
And the odds are not in their favor, if they way the demon is sprawled out on the couch (reminding Aziraphale suddenly of a very well-done noodle, and suddenly he's starting to wonder if humans had the right idea with stress eating) is any indication
Crowley announces that he refuses to utter the words tickety boo, even if faced with destruction
"Honestly I think I'd rather have the holy water at that point" "Crowley." "I swear you just make sounds up sometimes, those aren't even real words"
4 bottles (and a very large order of takeout) later, they've got the act down well enough that it's starting to weird Crowley out
"Angel, seriously, enough with the nose. When have I ever done that with my nose? Exactly zero amount of times. I'm not a rabbit"
2 bottles later and Aziraphale has miracled Harry the Rabbit into the flat for a reason they can't quite remember
But they've got music playing from somewhere in the corner, and plenty of drinks, and the night goes on into the morning, and then they're sobering up and marching out for the most dramatic acting of their lives
And the world hasn't ended yet, so they'll probably be fine. Probably.
