I'm aiming for eroticism but I'll settle for chaos

@reaperfromtheabyss

I'm Drake! He/Him/His pronouns "A mountain lives in mortal fear of its deer." - Aldo Leopold

268.6K posts

I just think Cats are incredibly neat ok. God was truly ballin' on a good day when Cats were invented. In fact I bet a cat was present giving constructive criticism the whole time letting God take the credit, knowing full well they gave themselves carte blanche to sleep in fucked up positions all the time.

Might I suggest, O lord, that their little noses scrunch up very funnily when they eat or smell a banana? Marvellous Idea, Sire.

All these tourists having a great time at the World Cup isn't surprising b/c the first rule of America is that this place rules if you have money to blow and it's a nightmare if you don't. The prohibitively high cost of attending the World Cup filtered out all the ppl who don't have money so all the people who actually made it to the U.S. are basically guaranteed to have fun

America hates the broke and woke and so every rich chud from abroad who comes over here goes home singing our praises. Tale as old as time.

unidentifiablelifeform

frejs-froggy-artblog

Here's two more of my OCs, Katla and Lilith! they're my disaster lesbians who break up and get back together once a week :)

I might post some of the comic pages about them in the future

free the nipple has to make a resurgence for a number of reasons but bro look at our upcoming eternity of wet bulb temps youre smoking straight up cock if you think im keeping a shirt on when it hits 105° in new england

everyone tits out with a parasol is such a beautiful world to imagine that the fact it doesnt currently exist fills me with equal parts fire and misery

congratulations players you've u̶n̶i̶o̶n̶i̶z̶e̶d̶ threatened me with violence

Every time you go in a public place and something ISN’T disgusting it’s because somebody cleaned it. Every time you feel comfortable using a public bathroom or sitting at a restaurant table or setting something on a gas station counter or playing on a playground it’s because somebody cleaned it.

Thank you to everyone who cleans the world, especially those who are underpaid and under appreciated.

Wait, listening to the same song on repeat is stimming?

I do not mean a normal amount of listening to the same song on repeat I mean that in October and November 2022 the only thing I listened to was Type O Negative's "Black No. 1" and I listened to it for 18 hours a day. This is, apparently, a kind of stimming.

*quietly hides the four playlists that I have that are just copies of one song from different recordings or releases*

To be clear I do not know what the normal amount is. When Large Bastard and I started dating I had a tape in my car with Tom Petty's "Dancing at the Zombie Zoo" on it that I knew exactly when to flip the other side (halfway through "Yer so Bad") so that I could flip it again and listen to Zombie Zoo again and I did that enough that Large Bastard still can't listen to Tom Petty and also it wore through the tape. So whatever normal is it is probably less than that.

Nope. And one of the things that made my doctors wave off the possibility of a diagnosis was "well, you don't stim or have trouble socializing or have sensory issues so you're probably just depressed and anxious."

No I just, you know, reexamined every interaction for hours after the fact and was convinced that I was evil or deeply broken for being unable to emotionally connect with people around me and had headphones hidden under my hair all the time to listen to songs on repeat so that I could pay attention to things and not get distracted by the way the classroom lights were flickering at exactly the wrong frequency.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN MOST KIDS DON'T HAVE TO BE TRAINED OUT OF WALKING ON TIP TOES

When not wearing shoes, will you be wearing socks? "Always" and "never" are both very diagnostic here.

Well, you see, the answer to this is nuanced because I Have A System (said while groaning and putting my face in my hands).

When you're wearing headphones, nobody knows that you're listening to Knowledge Fight #685: Formulaic Objections Part 7 for the 40th time.

Oh, I guess it was 2023.

Hmm. Okay. Well. That probably doesn't mean anything.

Unfortunately it is worse than that; this is hours listened to podcasts per month, 1640 hours per month is like 55 hours a day, which is possible because I listen to podcasts at 2-3x speed and only sleep for about five hours a night. This was to show there were no podcast hours listened in october and november of 2023 (because they all went to listening to Peter Steele)

Black No. 1 is 11 minutes long and at eighteen hours a day i was listening to it around a hundred times daily.

concept: instead of “time traveller from the past is unimpressed by the present” it’s “time traveller from the past loves things we don’t like about modern society” like they think pollution is badass or something

kragehund-again

medieval peasant upon hearing the number of species that go extinct every day: fuck yeah, damn those beafts to hell

"Sure, our society is safer and wealthier in many ways, but there are also so many ways in which we are poorer. So many beautiful things we've discarded like the salt we throw on streets in winter. Beautiful wild animals like wolves and bears are almost completely gone from this region, and city lights are so bright that we can barely see the stars anymore..."

"Wait, I never have to worry again about a wolf eating my sheep?? And I can see where I'm going even at night?? Hell yes, praise saint Julian the Hospitaller -- wait, what the fuck did you say about the salt"

natalieironside

My boyfriend was showing me his cat and I leaned over to kiss the cat on his soft little baby head and he went "meow" and scrambled away because I'd been wearing my headphones and I accidentally jabbed him with the microphone.

And I said "Damn, this is exactly like in the Iliad"

#explanation: this references the scene where Hektor the prince of troy goes to his wife after a battle and leans in to kiss his son #(who is still a baby and being held in andromache's arms) #but his son cringes away in fear of his father's battle helmet #it's a gut wrenching scene about how war dehumanizes you and separates you from the people you love #this interpretation implies that being a gamer is analogous

derinthescarletpescatarian

Thinking about that Tumblr user whose prepper brother was put in an emergency situation and finally got to use his prepper basement only to be in dire straits on the first day because the power was out and his only can opener was electric

✨🏳️‍🌈🌈 Star Trek Pride🌈🏳️‍🌈✨

Song: Acid Tunnel of Love by Toby Fox

there is so much to unpack in this clip

he's being transphobic to one of them but they can't tell which one

wtf is going on

derinthescarletpescatarian

When I was a kid, I lived on a farm, and once a year the adults would go duck hunting and bring home a few ducks. One year, it was me and my brother's job to pluck those ducks. We were, like, maybe eight or nine? Plenty old enough to pluck a duck, but with zero experience.

And that zero experience turned out to be a problem, because we hadn't had much to do with birds and the thing about a bird's feathers, right, is that you've got a feather that sits in a little sheath thing that's rooted in the body. So what you want to do is pull the feather and sheath both out. But if you're a little kid who's never done this before, all too often, the feather comes out and leaves the sheath in the body. So we'd be doing our best but the ducks would come out maybe a quarter plucked properly and otherwise still full of these feather sheaths, and then it's a matter of going back and pulling all these little sheaths out.

I remember quite clearly, my mother and aunt helping us with this part, because it's fiddly and we were taking forever. They'd take the plucked ducks and re-pluck them properly. And I remember my mum making a remark to my aunt (not maliciously, she didn't know I could hear and was just making conversation), "You know, it would've been easier for us to just do it from the start and not have to deal with all these fiddly little bits." And she was absolutely right -- my brother and I were involved for our benefit in the same way you get a young kid to "help" wash the dishes, we were learning a life skill. But even though we'd done most of the work, we'd removed most of the unwanted mass from the duck's skin, we'd actually made things harder. We'd removed all the feathers and a quarter of the sheaths, but the sheaths are much easier to remove with the feathers attached, so working on a "mostly plucked" duck was a lot more work for the adults than just doing the whole duck from scratch would have been.

Anyway, I vividly remember this incident every time someone suggests saving time by writing with AI and then just editing it into something good.

continuing traditions

I'm aiming for eroticism but I'll settle for chaos @reaperfromtheabyss - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag