I just want to add that there's always a limit to the amount of times you DON'T use "said."
Go too far in the other direction—every tag becomes "he chortled," "she hissed," "they thundered"—and you've got a different flavor of unreadable. It starts to feel like a comic book from the 60s, where every line needs its own exclamation point and dramatic verb.
The prose gets exhausting. Readers shouldn't need a thesaurus to follow a conversation, and characters shouldn't sound like they're performing every single line with a full-body emotive gesture.
The sweet spot is somewhere in the middle: "said" doing the heavy lifting invisibly, with action beats and the occasional specific tag dropped in where they actually add clarity or emphasis. Not because you have to vary it, but because the scene genuinely calls for it.
"You have the documents?" Marcus said looking around.
"They're in the car," Elena said.
"Go get them," Marcus said.
"Are you sure it's safe?" Elena said quietly.
"No," Marcus said. "But we don't have a choice."
Elena sighed. "Fine," she said. "But if I die, I'm haunting you."
"I'd welcome the company," Marcus said.
"You have the documents?" Marcus said.
"They're in the car," Elena replied.
"Go get them," he demanded.
"Are you sure it's safe?" she asked.
"No," Marcus answered. "But we don't have a choice."
Elena sighed. "Fine," she muttered. "But if I die, I'm haunting you."
"I'd welcome the company," he retorted.
And because we're trying so hard NOT to use "said" we end up going overboard and using a bunch of other synonyms that just don't need to be used. Something like this is better:
"You have the documents?" Marcus said glancing at Elena briefly.
"They're in the car." Elena looked away.
"Go get them."
"Are you sure it's safe?"
"No." He met her eyes. "But we don't have a choice."
She sighed. "Fine. But if I die, I'm haunting you."
"I'd welcome the company."
Sometimes you don't even need to say "said", "asked", "replied". Sometimes you don't even need it at all. Look at this:
"You have the documents?"
"They're in the car."
"Go get them."
"Are you sure it's safe?"
"No. But we don't have a choice."
"Fine. But if I die, I'm haunting you."
"I'd welcome the company."
It's not the best, but not really bad either. The rhythm is clear, the voices are distinct, and the back-and-forth carries its own momentum.
The only reason to add anything is when clarity breaks — a third person enters, or the exchange gets long, or the speaker isn't obvious from context. Then you drop in a beat: Elena looked away. Or a single "said." Then you keep going.
"Said" isn't bad. But silence — literal silence on the page, no tag at all — is often better. Not always the best option, but remember that it is one that you can use if you don't know how else to continue the dialogue.
ALSO I'M NOT A PROPER WRITER SO MY ADVICE ISN'T CORRECT. THIS IS SOMETHING I'VE TOLD MYSELF AND I'VE PERSONALLY FOUND WORKS THE BEST WITH DIALOGUE SCENES.
Writing isn’t a rulebook.
These are just tips that helped me. That’s it. They’re not better. They’re not final. They’re just mine. So take what works. Leave what doesn’t.
At the end of the day, it's still writing, with or without "said" in it.