I’m a firm believer that all of Franco’s doubts, insecurities and paranoia around you making fun of his appearance can be solved with kisses.
When you go to make out, you pepper his bunny teeth with your lips first. Especially if you guys are out and about and you’re staring at him which is a dangerous game. If he catches you, the quickest way to remedy the situation is to kiss him! Preferably on the lips and on those cute bunny teeth so he knows (and he wants everyone around you two to also know) that you mean it.
In the bedroom it’s the same. He gets really squirmy and shy underneath you sometimes even though he enjoys being dominated. He still gets self conscious. Pepper kisses all over his body and face and head, give his mind something else to think about.
If you’re a biter that’s even better. If you’re sitting together at a nice place to eat and he says something inappropriate, or maybe he’s making a sly comment about how you look, leaning over to give him a quick nibble on the ear and a “watch yourself” will send him to the moon. He also loves people who bite when they get excited. Munch on his shoulder when you get overwhelmed, chew on his cheek while you two are laying next to each other in bed, smother him in nibbles out of cuteness aggression. He loves all of it.
He mostly just wants to know someone’s out there who wants to touch him just because, and not for the money he’s constantly flashing around.
Random pre! Murkoff Franco Barbi headcanons (featuring Franco lines that inspired me)
Except his usual indulgences, I feel like Franco enjoys shopping for suits. Don’t you see him having new suits every day? I do.
“Watch the fucking suit.”
I also see him rocking a couple huge rings on his fingers (not golden rings he thinks it’s too much, too yellow and shiny), so he seems more intimidating, more worthy of respect.
“You make all that money, you want to make sure it shows.”
Speaking of respect, we always see mafia guys in media smoke cigars. What about Franco? Well, I think he doesn’t like them very much but smokes the fattest and most expensive one whenever he must make a public appearance since that’s what all the big shots are doing. Also, it’s something he saw as he grew up, all big and intimidating men smoking cigars so for him cigar = intimidating/important.
“Thought for a second I might be able to get a decent cigar in here but that thing smells like a dead man's cooked cock. ”
I personally think Franco struggles with his appearance. (big shocker I know, with how many quotes centered around his appearance it’s such a surprise) Meaning, I think he tries to hide his huge head with hats, the fedora kind of hat we see mafia men wear. He tries to act all big and mighty, as if he didn’t care about his appearance: “Fuck you, you think I’m getting any uglier.” Unfortunately, he very much does care about his general look so he wears the hat slightly tilted (since not one hat covers his whole head) over the red and inflated part of his head (which would be the left side of his head when facing him). He thinks it makes him look slightly more palatable.
If Franco were to flirt with a woman, I’m sorry but I just know he’s smooth with it till he’s not but then he is again? If that makes sense? It makes sense to me. I just know he’s smooth one time then says something and you’re like “what?” It’s because of the way he speaks; it’s entertaining, its smooth and he has that tone that always seems like he’s flirting or joking. (I think it doesn’t help that he has a nice accent on top of it but that just might be me.)
“Come here, Sweetness.”
“We could just… put a bag over that goose puppet. Pour a little Chianti, put old blue eyes on. She’d crush me like a hot little grape.” Based on that voice line about Gooseberry, we can imagine that Franco may tend to drink some wine from time to time and not only his Wolf’s milk. Furthermore, “ol blue eyes” is a popular nickname for Frank Sinatra (maybe it’s common knowledge but if it’s not well there it is.) So, with this we know that Franco most likely listens to Frank Sinatra, which doesn’t surprise me since Sinatra was one of the most renowned singers from the 20th century. (Frank Sinatra being from Italian descendance certainly helps the fact that Franco, also from Italian descendance, listens to him.)
The pros obviously include the insane wads of cash you get as tips. You will never have to worry about making enough to cover tipping out or anything like that because when I’m talking wads i mean WADS (He will try to stuff the money in your bra or your butt pocket be careful)
Strikes me as the kind of guy who will make you order for him. He can’t just be a normal regular and order the same thing every time to help you out - HAS to ask you what looks good today and makes you pick something out for him
If the food you order for him is ass he will 100% let you know and get something else but won’t make you feel bad for it, will make a complaint to the cook though
This man will not shut up. You’re busy? Too bad. On your break? Here’s some company! You genuinely cannot get to your other tables because he wants to talk about everything under the sun with you and don’t ignore him either he’ll go home and call the restaurant just to waste your time yapping
Speaking of which if this was a modern day au i can imagine him calling the restaurant to ask for more of his drink because he thought the service was too slow (actually just had this happen to me the other week) you might as well bring him his own pitcher
If he’s not drinking alcohol he always orders either a coke or the sweetest ice tea known to man
His dick feels funny when you call him sweet names while dropping food off like “hun” “dear” and “babe” (you’ll get even more money if you do this)
Asks you out every single time he comes in and wants to know everything about your personal life. I think he’s actually a pretty good listener so if you’re on your break and you’re having an off day he’s a really good person to rant to about the customers or whatever
Be careful about complaining too much about specific people though or they might go missing
Expects to be absolutely pampered and to be the exception for certain menu rules. You have to charge extra for sour cream? Nope not for him, “he’s a regular he doesn’t have to pay”
Touchy obviously
Also comes in at the weirdest hours, mostly nights because that’s when he’s working. If you work at some place like Denny’s that’s open 24/7 you’ll see him at 2am regularly, don’t ask him why he stinks of blood
Always gets dessert and tries to share it with you
Tries to share all his food with you honestly, i can see him being the kinda guy to say something like “you’re too skinny eat this” even if you’re a perfectly normal weight (he just wants to feed you and pretend you’re a couple)
Follows you home after you clock off some times, tells himself he’s being kind and doesn’t want anyone dangerous to do anything to you cough cough him
Knows you’re schedule like the back of his hand too, if you’re not there he’s making the day worse for everyone
Will probably keep the tickets if you’re the kind of person who draws on them or even just writes something sweet like thank you for coming in, definitely jerks to them
He jerks to you a lot actually, probably excuses himself to the restroom if he gets too big a whiff of your perfume
Buys you gifts! But crazy expensive ones that make you uncomfortable. Seriously. He bought you a 10k watch one time because you said you got in trouble for coming in late - he fully expects you to wear it every day
Depending on how long he’s a regular of yours (and how much he likes to harass you) he’ll get you flowers too, even if you’re not single
And as for that pesky partner of yours if youre not? Don’t worry about him either he’ll take care of it..
Franco would’ve been a creepy old man until the day he died grabbing on those CNAs in the nursing home and saying he “needs assistance using the urinal”
After seeing the interview with Daniel Brochu i choose to believe that’s what Franco’s normal every day voice sounds like/ what he would sound like if he grew up in a normal environment and went to school etc. The voice we hear in game is what he uses to feel and sound super cool which is why he only uses it when other people and the reagents are around.
I’m willing to bet if he talked in a normal voice he’d probably get more game from women.
Franco would most definitely have an Avoidant attachment style in relationships thanks to how his Dad raised him
I can see how a lot of people would headcanon him as anxious because of how desperate he seems for female affection and hatred for rejection but i think it’s a little more complicated than that, especially if we look at exactly how he wasn’t raised.
Avoidance attachment stems from the parental figure being emotionally or physically absent or just straight neglectful and often abusive, leaving their kids to deal with their emotions and effects of abuse on their own. Salvatore is the poster child for a neglectful parent.
Franco likes to put on a really big front. You could, for all intensive and cringe purposes, categorize him as a tsundere. He thirsts over people but would rather be caught dead than be seen by anyone (outside of the bedroom) as a needy baby who’s chasing a girl because he’s so desperate. He’s got a reputation to uphold! He’s a scary mobster who could get any girl he wants! He doesn’t “need” anybody. He raised himself so why should he be worried about relying on anyone?
Franco idealizes relationships more than he actually likes them. This is probably why Jenny got slimed even though she was his “favorite” of all the hookers. To be fair there’s a lot of possible reasons. An acorn could’ve dropped on the roof and he opened fire (funny police reference haha). But seriously he’s most definitely the type to be extremely turned off my emotional closeness.
The first couple of months dating him are (for his standards) great. He spoils you and revels in the attention and love. But then you start asking questions and being in his business. Bugging him about things like where he goes at night. He looks at other women on the street and your relationship starts to feel like a ball and chains. He wants someone new to love him all over again. Someone who doesn’t know anything about him, and will just give him love just because. Not because they feel pity for them, or because they “have to” because they’re in a relationship.
I think seeing how frequently his dad changed women it set something in him psychologically to like a revolving door of girls. He’s a greedy pig who wants it all without giving anything in return. Mostly because to return is to open yourself up emotionally and take responsibility for your immaturity. This man will never grow up.
I’m also a firm believer that after sex he gets CRAZY post nut clarity. He gets really embarrassed about the fact that he enjoys being babied and being vulnerable, even though it’s a guilty pleasure he only really gets to indulge in the bedroom. During sex he can make himself believe that his partner sees it as an act. That way he gets what he deeply craves without feeling vulnerable or like a big baby bitch. Outside of the bedroom, there’s no playing a fool, so he avoids it avidly.
That being said, like avoidants do, if you dump him or tell him how you feel he’d blow up on you and ghost you. Then come back after 2 months begging you to come back saying how sorry he is and how he wasn’t in the right head space (he’s not sorry he’s been with 10 other girls since you’ve been gone.) Quick and easy validation fuels him a lot which is why he loves hookers and cheating, but deep down he still wants someone that will love him unconditionally so he’ll always go back to the same person until they’re absolutely over his ass.
Also i myself am very avoidant so i don’t want any comments about how I’m slandering them. Having any non secure attachment style sucks and shouldn’t be villainized. It’s just in the case of this post the person with the attachment style is a literal villain.
Don’t get Franco wrong - he lovessss extroverted bubbly girls who have no shame in coming up and asking him for 20 bucks and to have a shot with him. He is the biggest attention whore known to man and will take attention anywhere he can find it, even if it’s not genuine.
HOWEVER he’s also a little rat who lovesss embarrassing shy girls.
Let’s say you’re with a couple friends and you’ve all had a few drinks. Your friends are the kind of people who’re really outgoing, light up the room. It makes you a little envious of their social skills sometimes but you don’t really mind keeping to yourself.
So you’re watching them doing things they probably shouldn’t do in front of people they probably shouldn’t be around (like pulling their shirts down and sitting a little too close to that man’s lap) when all of a sudden you see a short freak come up close and personal to you.
You’d just been watching amongst the sidelines making your four friends don’t make too bad of a decision, quietly observing with those pretty eyes - how could Franco not take interest? You were like a mystery box waited to be opened. So, naturally, he comes up and grabs you.
“What the hell!?” You squeaked as he pulled you closer, shoving his face into your chest and… sniffing?
“What’s a pretty thing like you doin standing over here and not on my lap eh” he wanted to see your face turn red, and it absolutely did. Not so much because of his comment, but more so because of where his hands were placed on your back side.
“I’m okay, thank you though” you were curt. Franco took it as a challenge.
“How come you don’t use that pretty voice more often? You could learn a thing or two from your friends over there about that, they won’t shut the fuck up!” He gestured towards your friends, the comment irritating you a little. “Just come over and have a good time with the rest of us, you’re already here aren’t cha?”
He pulls out a small wad of cash, half intending to show off, half trying to entice you into coming over. But to his surprise you remove yourself from his hold entirely, only glancing at the money.
“Actually if you excuse me I’ll be going. I’ve had enough fun tonight.” This pompous asshole really had the nerve to try and buy your attention after putting down your friends? What kind of shallow skeez did he think you were? Regardless, you were feeling tired from the booze anyways and thought it best to leave before you weren’t able to take care of yourself. You grabbed your friends and forced them to say their farewells, claiming it was ‘past their bedtime’.
All the while, Franco watched with amusement at the pretty bird he couldn’t catch. Maybe if he payed you a visit somewhere less crowded (like your house perhaps?) you’d take him up on his offers.
Franco probably had a black housemaid (like a lot of people during that time) and she was probably nicer to him than most and that’s why he’s lowkey in kahoots over gooseberry
- Doesn't matter what your gender is, he will suck on your nipples
- He loves all body types, skinny, muscular, chubby, whatever. He will squeeze you anywhere and everywhere
- He gets cranky if you're late, even by a few minutes. How dare you keep baby waiting >:(
- Tends to nibble on you a little whenever you kiss
- Is always the little spoon. He will never do anything else (besides laying on top of you)
- He gets way more affectionate whenever he's coked up or drunk. He clings to you with all this might so you basically just have to carry him every with you when he's like that
- Desperately tries to get you to drink 'Wolf's Milk' with him
- Whenever he gets upset, the best thing to calm him down is to bury his face in your chest. He practically smothers himself in your chest
- He sometimes licks you to get your attention and always has a stupid grin on his face when he does
- After you guys argue, he ignores you but if you don't try to get his attention and ignore him as well, he gets all pouty and whiny
- Bro has absolutely no shame, especially in public. He simply doesn't care. I mean, he is a powerful person in the mafia soo... Just prepare to be constantly groped in public by him at any moment
If he had kids with a woman and then dipped, and his kid grew up to be very successful whether it was for their looks or career he would ABSOLUTELY try to worm his way back into that kids life. And to cover his ass he’d say all these passive aggressive remarks about “I tried to see you but your mother wouldn’t let me blah blah blah”. Is also bragging to everything that he’s the father. Will go to extreme lengths to prove it to the public so he can be involved in the popularity and validation. He’s such a whore.
