Risen Reef @risenreef - Tumblr Blog

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Whenever Risen Reef or another Elemental you control enters, look at the top card of your library. If it’s a land card, you may put it onto the battlefield tapped. If you don’t put the card onto the battlefield, put it into your hand.

#magic the gathering #mtg #risen reef

medievaljournalist

ive been informed that the breaking wheel, gibbet, etc are actually 'solar punk', and possibly even Leftist

xtec

This is what the average YouTube thumbnail looks like now

#they pay me in woims #woims I tell yah!#WOIMS!

dark-light-knight

Illustration from The Rime of the Ancient Mariner for Andrew Lang’s The Blue Poetry Book by Lancelot Speed (1891)

evilwizard

pitch for my new tarot card “Me And The Bestieee”

pumpkinspicebluntwrap

whosname

[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]

thanksiloveyou

2014 average url: tumblring-in-the-tardis

2026 average url: weemp

captain-price-returns

This appears to be the president’s "proof" that vandals are sabotaging the Reflecting Pool.

catboybiologist

The shirt you see before facing off with a lvl 15 lotad

amiya-shirou

(Guy who has only read the manga of Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind and hasn't really watched Miyazaki's other movies) yeah I love the #ghibli aesthetic

samusblewupmyplanet

#aesthetic #comfy vibes

pancakeke

"there's a guy in the walls" movies exist in a universe that I fucking WISH was real. imagine how easy it would be to install stuff in walls if the space behind a wall was not 3.5 inches/8.9 cm deep and I could get my whole self in there. of course that would mean a guy could get in there too, but what are the odds.

starving-shartist

pancakeke

PLEASE help me feed these ethernet cables downstairs or I'm gonna kill myself before you get a crack at me

starving-shartist

thread it down here champ, we'll get this installed come hell or high water

pancakeke

you are the best scary murderer who could have ever crawled into my walls

pukicho

im gonna EXPLODE there's a BOMB attached to my CHEST

Girl whatever

squeakitties

following weird horny furries who are into shit like pooltoys and transformation and stuff is enrichment. the vitamins and minerals of posting

squeakitties

twinkenjoyer-deactivated2023083

once you get over your ass and realise you will never get some people and that’s ok you are basically immune to right wing fearmongering. otherkin? none of my fucking business

stevishabitat

mandate-transgenderism

I must not fall victim to disgust. Disgust is the heart-killer. Disgust is the little-death that brings total apathy. I will face my disgust. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the disgust has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

gay-cripply-scientist

aflo

A standard porno with the bad acting and music and whatnot but partway through the action the camera pans to a millipede and hunting spider locked in a duel for survival, the sounds of sex fade out and the scene in the background blurs, epic battle music starts to play

misogynistcatgirl

I know we are all like "people in caveman times would drill holes in their head to relieve headaches" andwe go oh that's so stupid that's so dumb but like. then I get a headache and I'm like.ooooh I get it I get it. Grug prepare the drill.