derealization? it’s kind of like waking up each morning with enough time to process that this is real. enough time to process that this is my body, in my bed, in my room. time to process if i don’t get up, i’ll have to pay the consequences because this isn’t a vr game someone paused.
imagine looking in the mirror and seeing the default skin when you know you paid for the skin you’re comfortable in.
imagine reaching for something other than your phone and hesitating because what if it isn’t actually there. imagine your arms aren’t fully attached, i mean they’re just floating by your side yet you feel millions of spiders crawl up to your elbow when you finally grab it. i mean you can’t feel the item in your hands.
imagine that walking is kind of like remembering the controls for the game you haven’t touched in a year. i mean you’re walking but you don’t remember how to walk at normal speed.
imagine walking into a room and closing the door behind you only to realize you just shut the door on reality. only what’s in that room makes up the entire map. imagine your vision blurs as the fear of opening the door to a black, unloaded area makes your heart try to break out of your chest.
imagine your headset is too heavy to hold up as the floor you’re stuck staring at is in 360p yet every sound is clear, max volume. imagine even hearing the buzzing of the lights but you’re in the busiest game lobby. i mean you can’t hear yourself breathe but you also can’t remember what button to push.
imagine people are talking but it’s all just default game noise you can’t fully piece together. you’re speaking but your mic is off. imagine the game lags, but only it’s your words slurring and the cpu’s are repeating themselves.
imagine taking damage. i mean you can’t feel it. i mean you’re bleeding. imagine that’s the only sign that gives you hope you’re not a character in a vr game.
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