Rock Hard Sisyphus

Up-and-coming indie band • "be a part of something before it gets real" • follow us at rock_hard_sisyphus on insta and RockHardSisy on X

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

Rock Hard Sisyphus is working on our DEBUT ALBUM, One Must Imagine Sisyphus Horny. Stay tuned... 🪨

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

I never played baldurs gate 3 but with the amount of astarion x reader fanfic I've been consuming, I might as well have finished the game

[rosie-kairi]

Hey dude. I noticed that you seem to be having a lot of symbolic association with the ouroboros icon and I just wanted to know if you were like. ok. or like, that you're experiencing time linearly and not stuck in an eternal loop of the same events.

[unyieldingsilence]

‎

[rosie-kairi]

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

I dont wanna die but,

They do make heaven very appealing

[mutationgirl]

pope francis died without lezzing out. don't let that happen to you.

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

Don't let that happen to you

[radishnt]

which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?

[mothman-misato]

y- you were putting it in cold water?????

[boimgfrog]

Radish. Answer the question radish.

[radishnt]

yeah??? i thought for like. 5 years that ppl just put it in hot water 2 speed up the tea-ification process didn’t realize there was an actual reason

[boimgfrog]

You dont have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes???

[catsnraincoats]

[ID: Tags reading “u think i have the patience to boil water wtf ?????” /End ID]

why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it

[boimgfrog]

Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove

[catsnraincoats]

Its takes less than a minute

[boimgfrog]

Bestie is ur stovetop powered by the fucking sun

[catsnraincoats]

How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove

[boimgfrog]

Like seven minutes

[catsnraincoats]

Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat n it boils in like two minutes… less than that is u use a saucepan…

[boimgfrog]

Crying you’re putting the whole mug on the stove ???? On medium heat???? Ur stove is enchanted

[pidoop]

Every single person in this post is a fucking lunatic

[silverjirachi]

Yet another post that reads like four shakespeare characters who come out in the middle of the play to talk about something completely unrelated for comic relief

[wizardlyghost]

(Enter RADISHN’T, MOTHMAN MISATO, BOIMG FROG and CATS'N RAINCOATS, stage left. They are having a HEATED DISCUSSION.)

RADISHN’T: Prithee, which one of you had planned to tell

Of diff'rent flavours gained by simple act

Of brewing tea with water hot, not cold?

MOTHMAN: Egad! you poured the water cold? Wherefore?!

FROG: An answer from you, Radish, I must beg.

RADISHN’T: Indeed I did, dear friends - why does this shock?

Without the guide of others I assumed

That heat was merely added for the sake

Of expediting this solution’s brewing!

Half a decade I have spent, or more,

Not questioning this worldview I had made.

In fact, I am myself a bit surprised

That you might think that I, your dearest friend,

Might have a patience of sufficient stock

To wait until a pot of water boils.

FROG: Three minutes overtaxes patience so?

The microwave will beep when it is done!

CATS'N: My friend, this answer vexes me the more!

Can it be true that thou dost boil by nuke?!

FROG: Are you in turn, my friend, so shocked to know

That I have not the patience, like our Root,

To boil upon the stove our favour’d drink?

CATS'N: It takes less than a minute!

FROG: On what plate?

Perhaps your dinner cooks atop the sun?

CATS'N: How long can take your stove to fill the task

Of boiling but a single cup alone?

FROG: In minutes?

CATS'N: Yes!

FROG: I counted seven, once.

CATS'N: Perhaps you ought to have your timepiece checked!

If on a middle heat you place the cup

You soon will have the scalding drink you crave.

Two minutes, in a mug upon the plate

Or even less, if you should have a pot.

FROG: You cause me tears - is this how thou dost live?

You place upon the iron stove a mug?

A mug, ceramic, filled with water cold?

How do these flames, though medium in height,

Not shatter like a glass this fragile thing?

Surely, then, your kitchen is bewitched

With magicks far beyond the mortal ken!

(The FOUR realise they have wandered into the THRONE ROOM. The ROYAL COURT watches with fascination.)

KING: Ev'ry single person in this group must be a fucking lunatic, it seems.

[elodieunderglass]

[dustyxoverture]

I’m sorry but the THOUGHT that has been put into this, I actually CAN’T—

The fact that nearly every line is so metrically considered- near perfect iambic pentameter witb the occasional trochee for emphasis, but usually retaining a strong sense of rhythm nonetheless. And then the king comes in at the end, so wound in his disbelief that his response is reduced to prose.

And the even better thing about this is how easy it would have been to structure the king’s line into iambic pentameter: it is effectively already said as such because of the way wizardlyghost has phrased it, yet they haven’t!! They did not break the line, rendering what, by all typically of both Shakespearean canon and other periods context should be the character with the most command and authority in the whole play. If there was ever a more effective way to convey a genuine “what the fuck??”, I know of it not.

But it gets better!! Shakespeare regularly uses meter in order to represent class divide; the nobility usually speak in iambic pentameter, save for a few particularly chosen moments (e.g. Lady Macbeth’s descent into madness, Othello’s realisation of Desdemona’s “betrayal”) or just lines where Shakespeare needs to suggest high emotion or when a character is lost in thought. Supernatural characters like the fairies in A Midsummer Night’s Dream and the Witches in Macbeth usually speak in trochaic tetrameter, an inversion of iambic pentameter. Lower class characters, particularly those used for comic relief (usually under the influence of alcohol), speak with no structure at all: their language is plain prose. Therefore, if this is a conversation between these types of characters, as the prompt from silvergirachi suggests, why the hell are the characters speaking so eloquently???

Now, this is Tumblr. It is subsequently logical to assume that this may have merely been a humorous recreation (and a very good one at that) of the Shakespearean style in a way that is widely recognisable to an audience that may or may not have read a great deal of Shakespeare, which is understandable. However, logic is boring so I’m going to probe further into this to the point where future historians will look to this as an example of overanalysing.

The inherent eloquence of the characters here suggests an unusual subversion of the roles typically assumed in Shakespearean comedy. This could be interpreted along two major avenues: firstly, that the rhetoric displayed by the speakers is fundamentally representative of how truth can be expected even from the most seemingly pointless or ludicrous discussions. Furthermore, it could suggest that it matters not how well constructed your speeches are: if you talk bullshit, it’s going to sound that way despite your attempts to hide it.

This is similar but not identical to the second avenue of interpretation: there is the implication that the noblemen in the play are in fact the comic relief characters, therefore implying that the “common people” of the play are the ones whose influence, though not expressed in such a highly spoken manner, makes a lot more sense than whatever the hell this is. If this was a real Shakespeare play, I would call it a subtle exploration into the innate corruption of the rich and powerful. Well done, op.

Now, I doubt any of this is actually grounded analysis in any way, shape or form, but if someone else can take this to the extremes of writing a Shakespearean scene, why can I not analyse it as such? And where else to do so than Tumblr?

[wizardlyghost]

im in tears i didnt think anyone would put this much analysis into this‚ thank you so much

[whetstonefires]

i also like that everyone else gets a version of their handle and then tumblr user pidoop is promoted to king

[writethebirds]

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

these are the infinite monkeys, I found them

[wlfb0ygrl]

saying “i want him” about the character but not in a romantic or sexual way . i just Require him i need to Obtain him

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

this but I really want to become him

[anthonycrowley]

i only speak the truth. unless i’m lying. or doing a bit. hope this helps.

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

Sometimes I just like to lie to see how much people will believe. I told one of my friends I saw a couple getting freaky in the milk section of Walmart once and they believed me for several weeks.

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

unless they specifically asked, you don’t get to tell a fanfic writer you think they mischaracterized the character by the way. because the second someone writes a fanfic about a character, that character becomes the writer’s own version of the character. canon is only a suggestion, but whether or not an author will follow it / how much of canon an author will take is entirely up to them. you don’t get to stick your nose in their world and tell them “hey this is not to my liking therefore I think you’re doing it wrong” when you can simply leave quietly and move on to something else you may enjoy

[walkingbandtee]

Fanfic authors write for free. You don't get to complain about free art. It's only constructive criticism if it was asked for. Otherwise, you're just being mean. You aren't entitled to anything. They don't have to make their work "better" for you.

I write for myself and post for others who enjoy it. If you don't enjoy it, move on. I love my writing. I write my characters in a way that I love. The day I change my writing to please others is the day I lose my genuine passion.

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

Dear ITS_VEGGIETALES1993,

Thank you for leaving a comment on my fanfiction; however, who tf knows what Bob and Larry's eye colors are. Sorry I got them wrong but that was not really the point of the fic. God bless and godspeed.

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

Rock Hard Sisyphus is so back !

In case you were wondering where we've been, we took a brief hiatus to feed the beast, take a piss, and semi-rebrand~

From now on, we will no longer be exclusively reposting dan and phil or sisyphus content. We will be original for once in our lives.

This being said, our debut album is nearly complete and will be released soon. Stay tuned, we love you, and keep pushing your boulder, babey.

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

If I had a nickel for every time I cried cause I couldn't find smth today, I could end world hunger I think

[writing-prompt-s]

You got stuck in a time loop. Unfortunately, your life is so mundane and boring that you haven't noticed.

[wild-fleurs]

Sisyphus for real lol

Like wait a minute didn’t I push this rock up this hill yesterday? Hmmmmmmmmm

[boycritter]

one must imagine sisyphus livin la vida loca

[nicky999doors]

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

Currently reading picture of dorian gray and it's making sense why they used this book to put oscar wilde in jail for being gay

[what-even-is-thiss]

Band called ship of Theseus who replaces one of their members with every album release

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

we did this but nobody followed us back then so technically it's the same band

right?

[kosmogrl]

[rock-hard-sisyphus]

once you get started, you can't stop

weigh your priorities