It's end of May, yall know what that means

#extradirty

izzy's playlists!
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Peter Solarz
styofa doing anything
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Cosimo Galluzzi

if i look back, i am lost

romaā
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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Show & Tell
Xuebing Du

titsay

ellievsbear
Sweet Seals For You, Always

Product Placement

oozey mess
sheepfilms
seen from United States
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seen from United States

seen from United States

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@rubybluedj
It's end of May, yall know what that means
yeah man
Once knew a guy from LARP who told a story about when he had first gotten his hands on chainmail and was getting used to wearing it and maintaining mobility and balance with the weight of it (it was heavy stuff). So he started wearing it under his clothes when he was out running errands and stuff to practice for when he had to wear it in mock combat.
Then one night he was coming home late and got mugged by a dude with a knife.
Apparently the look on the dude's face was amazing when he went in to gut the guy for his wallet and found out he was wearing medieval armor under his hoodie.
So, you know. Pretty good argument for wearing it under streetclothes!
so maybe my type isn't totally unrealistic
Fun story, i talked to two people who worked at a convenience store in the Kingdom of An Tir (SCA medieval society, An Tir's territory is WA, BC, northern ID, and OR, and in the past included AB and SK).
This convenience store was notorious for getting robbed in the evenings one or two times a month, so nobody wanted to work the night shift. The one fellow, he desperately needed a job, but he was also learning how to be a heavy fighter (sword & shield) in the SCA, so he had just finished a chainmail shirt, and asked if he could wear it under his uniform shirt, so long as it didn't show. The manager was just happy that he had someone willing to work nights, and said yeah, sure, so long as it doesn't show.
Guy starts working the night shifts, things are fine, he's getting used to everything, then late one night, a guy in a hoodie comes in, and asks for a pack of cigarettes. Our guy turns to get the pack, and feels a thump on his back. Turning around, scowling, he demands, "Did you just hit me??"
Guy in the hoodie widens his eyes, goes ash-gray, and faints. Clerk can't budge from behind the counter in case this is an attempt to distract and rob. But the guy remains out coold. Confused, our clerk calls the emergency services. EMTs come along and start checking out the patient, who is still out cold on the floor. While they're doing that, one of them comes up to the counter and asks what happened, exactly.
Our man tells the EMT, "Well, he just came in, looked around, came up to the counter and asked for a specific pack of cigarettes, so I turned to get them--"
And he demonstrates by turning his back to the EMT, who suddenly starts shouting, "--Sir! Sir! Are you okay? Don't move!"
Our man feels the EMT groping his upper back, and then the EMT asks,
"What the hell are you WEARING?"
"A chainmail shirt. I have to get used to the weight of it, so I wear it a lot. Why? Is something wrong?"
"You have a KNIFE in your back!"
"Uhh...no, I don't? I mean, I don't feel hurt? He only, like, punched me or something. There's no knife back there--I mean, I'd KNOW if there was a knife back there, right?"
EMT grabs the knife and pushes on his shoulder, yanking it out. "THIS knife! I'm going to need to examine your back!"
So they manage to get him out of his uniform shirt and out of the hauberk and out of the linen shirt under it (because chainmail bites suck, plus it's not nearly as fun as a Brazilian waxjob, because my SCA friend was hairy)...and it turns out he only had a very small scratch from the tip of the knife...which had gotten lodged in the riveted links.
...That was why the guy fainted. He'd stabbed the store clerk, who had turned around angrily, knife still lodged in his back.
Manager was so happy to have hired the guy, as that was the first time in like eight or nine months that the store hadn't been successfully robbed.
ābut what if you abort the baby whoāll cure cancer?!ā sir the baby who will cure cancer is an organic chemistry major who works at a Home Depot because you use AI to go through your resumes
"I am, somehow, less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einsteinās brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops." - Stephen Jay Gould, The Panda's Thumb: More Reflections in Natural History
if you come out of the movie with a main cast of a black man and a women both with fucked up interesting issues and i see your ass ONLY posting abt the white boy who was on screen for 10 minutes. i am actually the evil leftist who thinks your evil for that and i am going to block your ass. fuck off
I think one of the funniest abortion stances I've heard was from my parents neighbor. He's a like, hard-core libertarian viking larper guy who is very tall and very fat and very bald.
He believes a fetus is human with a soul, but also its "basically attacking the woman's body" so if she wants to get rid of it, that's "basically self-defense". He compared it to shooting a home invader. So he supports abortion not as healthcare, but as killing a baby in self-defense
Y'know I'm so glad someone reminded me of this. Because this was also discussed.
My stepmother did NOT like the way her Libertarian Viking Neighbor framed pregnancy as the fetus "attacking the woman". She incredulously told him this was extremely disrespectful to expectant mothers to portray pregnancy as so violent and negative.
Libertarian Viking Neighbor's response was that people consensually hurt each other all the time, and "there's like a whole community about that, with the acronym the one that starts with a B" And his reasoning was that if the mother was consenting to bring attacked by the baby, it in fact wasn't violent and negative because there was consent.
He brought up people consensually hurting each other, didn't go for one of the obvious answers like boxing or body mods or something, no he went STRAIGHT TO BDSM and he DIDN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE ACRONYM
Top 3 things people love insisting they don't have despite it being impossible
Pronouns
An accent
Bias
4. uno
i don't have it i got the oldest xbox known to man
top 5 horror movies
-having a job
-not having a job
-applying for jobs
-the job market
-the concept of working my whole life
If that ain't the story of fma idk what is
I remember growing up with this belief that because my body would be capable of pregnancy, I owed it to (?? the world?) to give birth before I died. just because it was a thing my body was "supposed to" do.
starting from my earliest inquiries into existence via "where did I come from" questioning as a tiny child, I was introduced to pregnancy as an inevitability, something fundamental to being alive that I would experience. I began my life with the understanding that I would experience both childbirth and death, and that it was pointless and maladaptive to express fear about either of them.
as I got older, everything I saw and read and heard about pregnancy/childbirth taught me that it was scary, painful, disabling, and often caused death, but that this was a sort of noble sacrifice that everyone must endure for the good of (??? the species?).
and then one day it just hit me that a slight majority of people on earth never experience pregnancy ever. they live full, meaningful lives. so maybe I did not have to do this terrible scary painful thing to be a human being, and have my life matter to people.
but soon after that realization, I started witnessing & experiencing sexual violence and became aware that as long as I had that organ, it was not my decision. I could always be forced to endure this. learning about the reactionary movements to block access to all protections against this (birth control & abortion) further emphasized that this was not under my control.
during my first pregnancy scare when I was a young teen, I found myself with perfect unshakeable certainty that if I ever became pregnant and could not access abortion within a month, I would kill myself. it was the only option, and I would take it. as I grew into an adult, I took with me the constant knowledge that suicide was my final protective option.
I was terrified to die. I didn't want to kill myself. I wanted to remove my uterus. but despite me begging every single doctor to just let me learn about my options, it took thirteen years to actually get a referral to a consultation with a surgeon and finally get a hysterectomy.
if you want kids to not kill themselves, let them get permanent irreversible surgeries to reshape or remove their sexed traits. it is not a decision kids pursue without consideration for the world around them; it is deeply informed by the world around them. these are not expressions of trivial desires for short-term benefits without consideration for how it will impact their bodies for the rest of their lives. these are profound assertions about what constitutes a bearable physical reality for someone during their one brief shot at existence before death.
it's not "irreversible damage." it is life itself.
having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i canāt be saved
I'm not in this Fandom, I did it for Kandi
Yep, I made a frutiger aero soft soap alienā¦ š§š š¤š«§š§¼
i have a story for you, tumblr. last year my coworkers and I were riding in a golf cart at a music festival passing out drinks to people, because the festival had been cancelled that day and everyone was trying to make the best of a bad situation. after some time we spot a guy on the other side of the road dressed as lord farquaad, walking alone. we yell, āLORD FARQUAAD! DO YOU WANT A DRINK??ā dude yells an affirmative, walks into the road without looking, gets hit by a fucking car, and goes flying.
I really need you to picture a lord farquaad being dummy yeeted into the air by an incoming vehicle while a golf cart of inebriated, glitter and mud plastered coworkers are full-on horror movie screaming together. before we can even process this, lord farquaad gets up like 𤪠how bout that drink?? completely okay, utterly unphased, red hat and bob wig still locked the fuck in. we check on him several times, all talking over each other, and while heās calmly and pleasantly assuring us heās fine, he passes each one of us a tiny jesus figurine. he bestows a āgod bless you allā and then resumes his jaunt, drink in hand.
after that we drove in total relieved hysterics, the kinda laughter that only happens when you narrowly avoided catastrophe. and i have NO idea if the driver that hit him even said a word because my entire consciousness in that moment was farquaad, there was only farquaad. I hope that he reads this one day and knows that he is STILL talked about and regarded as some sort of festival cryptid. we are blessed indeed
I def think everyone should carry a healthy amount of skepticism in an age where virality is often more prioritized than the truth but!! behold, a piece of my workplaceās holiday mailer. my coworker is the designer of this mailer and she included all sorts of references to our experiences in 2025. she was one of my coworkers on the golf cart with me and of course, included an ode to farquaad
sometimes magical and weird things do really happen