Sex God

20. gay. she/her. really fuckin g bored.

[shencomix]

[cheeso]

shower gel label:  immerse your self in this new   “Me Time” luxury   fruity tooty.    abandon all sense of identity and dissolve  Your memories into this   soothing chemical broth    One billion melons are in this tube… use them wisely

[thinkpiecebot]

Leaving Their Legos™ On The Floor Where They’ll Get Stepped On: The REAL Cause Of The Diabetes Epidemic

[crap-userrname16]

[s-s-s-senpai]

me [searching the beach with my child]: sorry honey, doesn't look like there's any sand dollars left

child: can't the ocean just make more of them?

me: and cause inflation? destroy the sand economy? jesus christ Tiffany, use your head

[staff]

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits

[nemfrog]

“Each dot represents 5,000 hogs.” World Geography. 1948. 

[boingoalive1988]

untapped infinite hog supply in the ocean

[sketchmagetch]

Each state is lined with an impenetrable wall.of swine. We are trapped

[egirlbutternubs]

We’ve lost canada and mexico to the hogs already

[mockwa]

дракончик

[nick-avallone]

View this post on Instagram

there was also a huge bug at the order window (we were at starbucks) and the 2 women inside were too scared to open it so I got out and shooed it away so they gave us my moms tea for free hahahaha

[e-cryptid-deactivated20180601]

The funniest homophobic notion out there is the whole, “you’re just a lesbian because you can’t get a man” thing. Like, do you have any idea how easy it is to get a man? It takes a smartphone and ten minutes of time while trying to get a girlfriend is like trying to win the lottery with a single ticket you found on the sidewalk. 

[e-cryptid-deactivated20180601]

And you and the lottery ticket are both too scared to make the first move so actually you just walk past it wistfully.

[plasmalogical]

yeah i reckon they might be

[edgebug]

brain: theres 35 hits on your fic and no kudos nobody likes it

me: calm down it’s 22k words and we literally just posted it, people are reading it still

brain:

[manrippedapartbydogs]

[powerburial]

bro do u really have to circle it when it’s the only thing in the picture

[clairidryl-deactivated20180621]

That’s it’s aura

[s-s-s-senpai]

person: god dang it

god: IT HAS BEEN DANGED

[clouds-of-wings]

ackerwin:

there will never be a silmarillion movie but if you play the lotr soundtrack over keeping up with the kardashians you get the general idea

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I’ve been a changed person since I found out that all of Santa’s reindeer are gals

[coccineusrosso-deactivated20180]

they’re wHAT NOW

[one-time-i-dreamt]

gals, theY’RE GALS

[one-time-i-dreamt]

male reindeer shed their antlers at the end of mating season (early December), while females keep theirs during the winter

and what do Santa’s reindeer have?

ANTLERS

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I

[dinofloof]

Feathered dinosaurs were even fluffier than we thought

A University of Bristol-led study has revealed new details about dinosaur feathers and enabled scientists to further refine what is potentially the most accurate depiction of any dinosaur species to date.

YES GOOD