rah rah rasputin something something sour cream
He was a cat that smoked a whole bong
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@s0ld-0ut-things
rah rah rasputin something something sour cream
He was a cat that smoked a whole bong
bois
a group of mystery-solving teens break into my wizard tower andāafter a series of whimsical and spooky hijinksāmanage to tie me up and say āalright gang, time to see whoās really behind this ugly āevil wizardā mask,ā and then they pull on my face and i go āowā¦ā
Would you like Krongus to remove the teens from the premises
jeepers. just throw em in the pit
Which pit?
The tower possesses 3 pits
theāthe death pit, obviously
Krongus is unsure of the morality of condemning the teenagers to the death pit
would you do it for a krongy snack
Jinx trying to have a grownup a conversation with Silco.
i got inspired by this post :p
Walk into your kitchen at 3am and this wizard is waiting for you, having drunk your beer and sampled, but disliked, your potato chips, hasnāt done the dishes, and he isnāt happy
What do you do?
āReally, Carl? Really? Christ, I knew the breakup with Cindy was bad-but not THIS bad! Howād you even get in my house? Why are the Utz all over the floor? Wh- how did you get in my house!?ā
āDamn your foolās mind, Randy, the mists of dream still you know my Amulet of Saros allows me passage through all portals, physical and arcane. I came here as this apartment provides protection from the mental ravaging of that dark sorceress, Cindy, gods blast her name! Your fermented beverages are all that have kept me from darkness this night, Randy, would you turn me away in this hour of terror?ā
certified iconic post
everyone talking about wizard posting needs to pay respects to the original
Heritage post
MF DOOM's villainous Mac and Cheese recipe
absolutely fucking killing it tonight
I think itās interesting that tabletop warlock bargains generally operate on the idea of eternal servitude or owning your soul or whatever but there is a world of alternatives that range from funny, dramatic, or just plain interesting. Consider:
Patron was sealed for a long period of time, and more than seeking their revival, they miss the world and its experiences, and thus seek warlocks who are willing to share their senses with their patron and thus ameliorate the loneliness and fatigue of ages
Patron likes money and valuables and will bequeath power in exchange for a warlock who will share their adventuring fortunes.Ā
Patron has a chaotic sense of humor and likes fire and explosions; causing spectacular destruction pleases them.
Patron is just kind of a (relatively wholesome) frat bro who gave the warlock powers because they decided the warlock was chill and could hang, maintaining powers hinges on navigating said relationship. Patron may manifest physically for the exclusive purpose of fistbumping warlock if they do something really cool.
Patron is a foodie and warlock is a chef traveling the world looking for rare ingredients and lost techniques to construct dishes that please their patronās palate
Patron is a literal patron- warlock is an artist of any form and the patron commissions them for works from time to time.
Warlock babysits (or performs another service) for patron, who prefers to pay them in dark powers.
Variant on above where warlock is occasionally ordered to perform various esoteric tasks such as delivering an object to a site or obtaining something and sending it to their patron- they are simply running their reclusive patronās errands as the latter would rather not leave home.
Patron and warlock promised to be best friends forever when one or both of them was a small child and patron takes that very seriously
Patron likes blood but is disinterested in full-body sacrifices as their particular taste means that some people are exceptionally delectable to them, and it seeks to prolong those peopleās lives as long as possible in exchange for semi-regularĀ āblood donationsā
Patron was disembodied and in exchange for being allowed to inhabit the warlockās flesh, is willing to fight to defend the shared body.
Patron specifically seeks to cultivate adventurers and support them throughout their career, in a manner similar to a professional wrestlerās manager.
Warlock was a child sacrifice, offered live, at a dark altar; patron has an interesting definition of whatĀ āthe child is now mineā entails.
Patron is an alternate timelineĀ āpotential futureā of the warlockās who is either trying to influence events to ensure their timeline or prevent it.
ā Patron likes blood but is disinterested in full-body sacrifices as their particular taste means that some people are exceptionally delectable to them, and it seeks to prolong those peopleās lives as long as possible in exchange for semi-regular āblood donationsā āĀ Ā This likely confuses most vampires.
Depending on your interpretations of vampires, you could roll this WITH a vampire as a patron. Just imagine an eccentric and highly out of touch ancient vampire noble who doesnāt get out much and is like a weird old high society uncle who chortles at your latest antics like ohohoh, delightful, take this and go give them what for, would you? and hands you an extremely evil sword.
renaissance in the 21st century
some more
the WHAT??
okay, found her
some more good replies from the notes
do any of the fanboys saying momo has to show that much skin because she needs it to use her power wanna explain to me why bakugou wears gloves
valid point but also i forgot that bnha existed for a second and was very confused as to why people were arguing about a lemur being naked
IāM DYING THANK YOU
Same energy
trifecta
quadrifecta
āTortillaā would match toĀ ātortaā, whichā¦.is a real Spanish word that just means cake, yāall.
Tortillas are little flat cakes.
in addition, mosca means fly
mosquito does mean little fly
lmfao
ādumpā is an old adjective that meant ādoughyā so ādumplingā is basically ālittle doughy thingā
Yes but thatās not funny.
Doro still at large
finally, the thrilling radio play adaptation
lady dimmadome
if we'reĀ friends or even just mutuals on here:
just because Iām quiet doesnāt mean I donāt care about you
I send happy thoughts and good energy your way
Iām bad at expressing these things a lot of the time
communication just takes a lot out of me sometimes (so I end up being pretty slow to reply to messages/texts/etc)
I read your posts and updates
I care about the stories/poems you write, the jewelry you make and/or the art you create
I hope the bestĀ for you
I care about you and I think youāre awesome