A Hand To Hold

☽Sara Nyx☽Texas☽♀☽27 years old☽"There’s a lot of things you need to get across this universe. Warp drive… wormhole refractors… You know the thing you need most of all? You need a hand to hold.” — The Doctor, Season 6, Episode 6

[fortunatelychaoticphantom]

I swear to fucking god. I would claw out OneDrive from my computer if I could. I would burn down their servers if I could. I would run down their stocks to the ground if I could. I hope every single one of their workers gets a better offer from a competitor in the next 24 hours. I hope every single one of their light bulbs explodes at the same time. I hope every single carton of milk in their fridge will always be expired.

Stop backing up my fucking files.

Stop asking me to back up my fucking files.

Stop taking my fucking files off my fucking computer.

I don't want a fucking reminder in three fucking days. Let me fucking say no.

Fuckers.

[prismatic-bell]

Friend, I have news you're gonna love. Here's a text tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 10.

Here's a text tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 11.

Here's a video tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 10.

Here's a video tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 11.

Go forth. Be free.

[ophilosoraptoro]

Reblog to save a life... and someone's sanity

[whitepeopletwitter]

[blanketfortarchitect]

[rebloggingistheenemy]

[anxietyproblem]

[aropride]

please god let chatgpt die out like nfts did. With a fast and graceless fall into irrelevancy

[bladespark]

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

[atwotonedbird]

This spell has a very low hit ratio, so we need a lot of us to do it.

[cowthropologist]

Do I actually want to write this fanfic or do I just want to wallow in the delicious daydream like a pig in the mud?

[thebitchywitchyone]

Unfortunately I wish for others to wallow in my magnificent mud pit

[yaketysmax]

thank you for the magnificent mud pits, fanfic writers

[penny-anna]

Legolas pretty quickly gets in the habit of venting about his travelling companions in Elvish, so long as Gandalf & Aragorn aren’t in earshot they’ll never know right?

Then about a week into their journey like

Legolas: *in Elvish, for approximately the 20th time* ugh fucking hobbits, so annoying

Frodo: *also in Elvish, deadpan* yeah we’re the worst

Legolas:

[penny-anna]

~*~earlier~*~

Legolas: ugh fucking hobbits

Merry: Frodo what’d he say

Frodo: I’m not sure he speaks a weird dialect but I think he’s insulting us. I should tell him I can understand Elvish

Merry: I mean you could do that but consider

Merry: you can only tell him ONCE

Frodo: Merry. You’re absolutely right. I’ll wait.

[penny-anna]

#legolas’ hick accent vs #frodo’s ‘i learned it out of a book’ accent #FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

Legolas: umm well your accent is horrible

Aragorn: *hollering from a distance* HIS ACCENT IS BETTER THAN YOURS LEGOLAS YOU SILVAN HICK

Frodo: :)

[storywonker]

Frodo: Hello. My name is Frodo. I am a Hobbit. How are you?

Legolas: y’alld’ve’ff’ve

Frodo, crying: please I can’t understand what you’r saying

[ramshacklefey]

Ok, but Frodo didn’t just learn out of a book. He learned like… Chaucerian Elvish. So actually:

Frodo: Good morrow to thee, frend. I hope we twain shalle bee moste excellente companions.

Legolas: Wots that mate? ‘Ere, you avin’ a giggle? Fookin’ ‘obbits, I sware.

Aragorn: *laughing too hard to walk*

[reformedkingsmanagent]

@ghostriderofthearagon

[cryptidscrypticcrosswordclub]

dYinGggGggg…

[whetstonefires]

i mean, honestly it’s amazing the Elves had as many languages and dialects as they did, considering Galadriel (for example) is over seven thousand years old.

english would probably have changed less since Chaucer’s time, if a lot of our cultural leaders from the thirteenth century were still alive and running things.

they’ve had like. seven generations since the sun happened, max. frodo’s books are old to him, but outside any very old poetry copied down exactly, the dialect represented in them isn’t likely to be older than the Second Age, wherein Aragorn’s foster-father Elrond started out as a very young adult and grew into himself, and Legolas’ father was born.

so like, three to six thousand years old, maybe, which is probably a drop in the bucket of Elvish history judging by all the ethnic differentiation that had time to develop before Ungoliant came along, even if we can’t really tell because there weren’t years to count, before the Trees were destroyed.

plus a lot of Bilbo’s materials were probably directly from Elrond, whose library dates largely from the Third Age, probably, because he didn’t establish Imladris until after the Last Alliance. and Elrond isn’t the type to intentionally help Bilbo learn the wrong dialect and sound sillier than can be helped, even if everyone was humoring him more than a little.

so Frodo might sound hilariously formal for conversational use (though considering how most Elves use Westron he’s probably safe there) and kind of old-fashioned, but he’s not in any danger of being incomprehensible, because elves live on such a ridiculous timescale.

[whetstonefires]

to over-analyse this awesome and hilarious post even more, legolas’ grandfather was from linguistically stubborn Doriath and their family is actually from a somewhat different, higher-status ethnic background than their subjects.

so depending on how much of a role Thranduil took in his upbringing (and Oropher in his), Legolas may have some weird stilted old-fashioned speaking tics in his Sindarin that reflect a more purely Doriathrin dialect rather than the Doriathrin-influenced Western Sindarin that became the most widely spoken Sindarin long before he was born, or he might have a School Voice from having been taught how to Speak Proper and then lapse into really obscure colloquial Avari dialect when he’s being casual. or both!

considering legolas’ moderately complicated political position, i expect he can code-switch.

…it’s also fairly likely considering the linguistic politics involved that Legolas is reasonably articulate in Sindarin, though with some level of accent, but knows approximately zero Quenya outside of loanwords into Sindarin, and even those he mostly didn’t learn as a kid.

which would be extra hilarious when he and gimli fetch up in Valinor in his little homemade skiff, if the first elves he meets have never been to Middle Earth and they’re just standing there on the beach reduced to miming about what is the short beard person, and who are you, and why.

this is elvish dialects and tolkien, okay. there’s a lot of canon material! he actually initially developed the history of middle-earth specifically to ground the linguistic development of the various Elvish languages!

[bowditch]

Legolas: Alas, verily would I have dispatched thine enemy posthaste, but y’all’d’ve pitched a feckin’ fit.

Aragorn: *eyelid twitching*

[linguisticparadox]

Frodo: *frantically scribbling* Hang on which language are you even speaking right now

Pippin, confused: Is he not speaking Elvish?

Frodo, sarcastically: I dunno, are you speaking Hobbit?

Boromir, who has been lowkey pissed-off at the Hobbits’ weird dialect this whole time: That’s what it sounds like to me.

Merry, who actually knows some shit about Hobbit background: We are actually speaking multiple variants of the Shire dialect of Westron, you ignorant fuck.

Sam, a mere working-class country boy: Honestly y'all could be talkin Dwarvish half the time for all I know.

[sainamoonshine]

Pippin, entering Gondor and speaking to the castle steward: hey yo my man

Boromir, from beyond the grave: j e s u s

[esser-z]

Tolkien would be SO PROUD of this post

[runiaimperii]

It got better

[peaceheather]

there may come a day when i do not reblog this post, but it is NOT THIS DAY

[sunriseswell]

I think we need more stupid- and I mean stupid- PHM aus that keep the plot but change the profession. This is an untapped goldmine trust. Trust.

----

"I'm not a pop star!" He cries, not for the first time. "I can't carry a tune- I can't even carry a box without dropping it-"

"You've been present for every major rehearsal and choreography lesson," Stratt counters. "You know every song like the back of your hand."

"I can't even play an instrument. I took trumpet lessons when I was ten, but I was horrible at it."

"Perfect," Yao adds, a little too chipper for what they're all telling him to do. "You don't need to play, you just need to pretend."

"I'm not a pop star!" His hands hit the table in time with every syllable. "Some of us are failures, okay? We can't just walk out on a stage in front of- in front of the world, okay?"

"Grace, you'll be in very cool company," Ilyukhina quips, gesturing between herself and Yao.

"Do you think I kept you on this project so long because I needed a junior high school teacher around?"

Stratt's words are cold, sharp as glass. They cut through the room, hush falling in their wake.

"You know the setlist. You know the timing for every costume change. You've been around for every major meeting and discussion about the future of this group- I made sure of it. You had the face we need, so I made damn sure you had the knowledge we need. God knows I didn't want it to come to this, but here we are. You've been the understudy all along."

Aka an AU where Stratt drugs a schoolteacher, gives him amnesia, and glues a Hannah Montana wig to his head. For the bit.

(I'm supposed to be working on my finals, can't you tell?)

[primarybufferpanel]

[wishiwerehere101]

I’m back with more ranting

I swear to GOSH if I see Noah Mullins as David fry being leaked I’m going to personally FIND THE LEAKER AND DO SOMETHING NOT EVIL BUT MEAN

Can we please stop leaking NFTS 🥲 I’ve seen so many enraged Redditors say the same thing like it has GOT TO STOP😭

[heypax]

yknow when you spend a bunch of time saying hey. if u keep leaking bootlegs and not respecting the masters rules they will quit filming and we will all lose. and then people do it anyways and masters quit and youre obviously v upset but there’s also a feeling of yh if u fucking listened and had some patience but nooooooo

[cocofetti]

[legallymay]

i find it hilarious when people say things to the effect of ''stanning celebs, i.e rg, is immoral. i'm only invested in the characters.'' as if the show isn't spearheaded by tim minear who, though we might not think of him as a celeb, has more influence than rg ever has. stanning the characters is tantamount to stanning tim minear (et al.)'s vision. by all means, let's be critical of the people who produce the media we consume. these holier-than-thou attitudes are weird asf tho imo

[but-a-humble-goon]

Watching the conservative outrage over Superman, it's so revealing that conservatives seem think "kindness and decency are woke" is an anti-kindness and decency argument and not a pro-woke argument.

[poughkeepsiesjr]

genuinely I can't stop laughing at the fact that it's a canon buddie dynamic that eddie just goes around doing vaguely evil and illegal shit and buck follows him going surely this is all perfectly legally sound because eddie - my eddie, the paragon of goodness with a silver star - would never do anything illegal. but then again what else could I have expected from buck 'follows eddie diaz into what he suspects is a mob establishment with zero questions' buckley

[the--council]

Our Lover (Ao3) is away at war (down for maintenance) and We don't know when they'll return (it's scheduled for about 3 hours)

[radicalgraff]

“From Palestine to the Phillipiness…Stop the US war machine” seen in Mexico City

[acollectionofbrokenthings]

“You deserve better” is an interesting way of saying I’m not worth getting better for