bitch

pee your pants

[socialistexan]

[vitabreva]

[themummersfolly]

How dare you leave this in the tags.

[charlesoberonn]

[syekick-powers]

extremely underrated subgenre of tumblr post: when someone makes a general statement about something, and another person offers a counter-statement that's just completely nonsensical, and the OP just agrees instantly even if it makes no sense at all

examples:

[anxeious]

one thing about me is i’m gonna go lay down

[shamebats]

Did they task the vampires with hanging up the flags 😭

[stimman4000]

.

[cipheramnesia]

good luggage goes in the fun bubble

[floweramon]

When I was in college, my Stage Craft teacher showed us this.  Basically the machine heats up a sheet of plastic, and once it’s malleable enough it’ll be blown up to make room for whatever you want to imprint in the plastic.  Once it’s in place, the air reverses and the plastic vacuum-sucks all around the object.  

He demonstrated it on a baby doll and it was like a baby had been frozen in carbonite.  I got to take it home and I still have frozen-carbonite-baby to this day (his name is Franklin XD)

[reximus44]

[galsinspace]

The baby has been posted here

[bunniope]

rapidly unsheathes my katana and you immediately get a phone call from your wife asking for a divorce

[bunniope]

I ONLY DO DIVORCES

-CALLIE MAAMLET, DIVORCE RONIN

[ceruleanheaven]

all that and i havent killed myself yet i must really love this stupid fucking life

[persianmom]

I am chronically online but not in a way that keeps me informed #mybubble

[talontarget]

jkr is literally posting upskirt photos to her social media. when will it finally get through to harry potter fans that their support makes her feel confident and correct enough to do things like this

[daggerdoggy]

settings > wound > my wound > reopen

[daggerdoggy]

do not forget this

[ID: Tag that says, "#options > add salt". End ID]

[thememedaddy]

[project-catgirlpiller]

[tiny-space-whale]

Reblog if you are a human rights extremist who believes that all humans are equal and has no sense of loyalty to nation states.

[meanbuddhist]

my body knows something that i don’t and i can’t get her to talk to me

[fthgurdy]

Re: the last post, the article mentions that some places use clams to test the toxicity of the water. It’s like that in Warsaw- we get our water from the river, and the main water pump has 8 clams that have triggers attached to their shells. If the water gets too toxic, they close, and the triggers shut off the city water supply automatically.  

The clams are just better at measuring the water quality than any man-made sensors.

Edit: check out this documentary trailer : https://vimeo.com/408820791

[zvaigzdelasas]

God Bless Our Troops

[looksmokin]

They hot glued a spring to a clam and gave it full control over the water supply

[sindri42]

No of course not, that would be ridiculous.

They hot glued springs to eight clams and gave them collective control over the water supply.

[strangetikigod]

No of course not, hot glue would kill the clams.

The used silicone adhesive to attach springs to eight clams and gave them collective control over the water supply.

[emily84]

[amygdalae]

kind of hate my stupid caustic pussy for dissolving my underwear over time but it's kind of cool, like, scientifically

[destinationtoast]

dying at this sequence from @pinkydragon01 :

[halfbloodfanboy]

[cafffine]

woke up this morning, rolled over, and very confidently tried to blow out my alarm clock like a candle. absolutely no precedent for that.

[wizardshark]

In the year 1450 a priest rolls over and slams his hand into his candle, burning him and sending wax flying all over the place

[sicknastyjr]

Your 20s are not about getting your life together they're about learning to escape the self imposed torture labyrinth you've built inside your own head