Dial-a-Llama

You need a llama? Dial-a-Llama gets you a llama. Any time, any place. She/her. Jewish. עם ישראל חי

[willabee]

BREAKING NEWS: cozy time

[botanyshitposts]

Any updates on coconut dick eating boy?

ah, i have multiple asks about this so it must be making the rounds again out there in the wilds. i never heard from the person again after that ask but we did come to a conclusion.

the kind of boring conclusion was that it really was just a normal coconut sprout and is completely edible. so edible, in fact, that some places in the world promote them as a superfood. we did not know this because the 3 of us were botany people living in iowa, which is the opposite of where these things are normal and you can just get them at the store or whatnot and people are just like, 'oh yeah thats a coconut sprout. you guys dont know its a coconut sprout?'.

so as amazing as it is, this person almost certainly faced absolutely no cosmic repercussions for eating a thing they couldn't identify out of a coconut they found just like, sitting on a beach they were visiting. if anything, it may have only made them stronger. i have no idea who they are or where they went, but if they kept eating random stuff out of coconuts they found on random beaches, they're probably like, out there lifting buildings and throwing cars around by now.

[plethodoncinereus]

i’ve got a coworker who loves eating coconut sprouts but i haven’t tried yet (because i don’t carry a machete around with me)

fun fact to sprout, a coconut has to sit unmoved in one spot for 4-6 months, which is difficult given how people and animals seem to really like moving coconuts around

[jewishpangolin]

Hello it is I, the one who ate the mysterious coconut. And yes, it did make me stronger. I eat all kinds of things I find in the wild and I haven't died yet!

[calvinandhobbescomic]

[magpie-scraps]

He’s read one (1) page since he sat down.

[therationaldispatch]

"Michelle" - Noam Bettan

[kaoinim-deactivated20220927]

[ratsoupee]

More grace and pebbles + the riveting sequel-prequel

[ratsoupee]

field trip cancelled

Based off hit tumblr post:

[nvexe]

my pronouns are she/her bc I'll never be him (anthony head playing on his pink ds in full costume on the set of merlin)

[youdontknowhowtodiequietly]

RIP King

[tearlessrain]

having anxiety is like being given permanent unwanted custody of a halter arabian. like okay buddy is it panic time again. cool you probably need more exercise and an apple and then maybe you'll calm down.

[tearlessrain]

taking my stupid walks for my stupid mental health with my stupid hypervigilant brain horse

[tearlessrain]

thoroughly enjoying the notes on this post because it's equal parts people with anxiety going "yeah that's what it's like" and people with arabians going "yeah that's what they're like"

[theoneofwhomisblue]

Scooping him

[circumgutter]

[kaijulius]

just a perfectly lovely autumn day in Hatchetfield nothing to see here

[nonbinaryjudean]

If you support people with OCD, stop reblogging posts that say “reblog this if you aren’t transphobic/homophobic/racist/ableist” or “reblog this for good luck ignore for bad luck”

[kateammann]

Happy Pride Month to all of my fellow aces!! 🖤🩶🤍💜

[1000cavalry]

TSV season 3 spoilers:

[botanyshitposts]

So I found this coconut on the beach in Costa Rica and when I opened it THIS was inside. I think it’s the endosperm (or whatever you call the thing that develops into the tree). The coconut water itself wasn’t as sweet as usual (probably because it had sprouted), but the little sprout boi tasted sweet on one end and salty on the other. (submitted by @jewishpangolin)

—————-

dude i have no idea how to tell you this but i have no idea what this is. i showed this to my plant anatomy professor and one of the mods at @thebashfulbotanist after class and none of us could figure out what this is. it doesn’t look like a fungus, the embryos in coconuts are tiny and don’t look like this, and the first thing a coconut sprouts is a root, not the stem, and it grows outward. there should be nothing normal like this growing in there. my plant anatomy teacher has never seen anything like this and has offered to forward this image to a palm researcher she knows to see if he has. i repeat, we have no idea what you ate but it was not a normal sprout boi. please stand by

[sumikatt]

submitter: heehee look at little coconut!!! 😩

op, their classmates, and their botany professor:

[nmpositive]

A weird prehistoric Cordyceps spore released from melting Arctic ice floated on thermals for a decade before infesting this coconut; OP has recently climbed to the top of a palm tree and is waiting to be eaten by a Pterodactyl.

[diosapate]