Scrabblezard Esclarion, Librarian

An Announcement.

((I know I let this blog go because I was focused on so many different projects, but with one of my major projects completed I am now more available for this again. It won’t be as constant as it was before in order to respect the private lives of people and I would like to operate it differently. So I propose a rotating system of Event Responsibilities. People will sign up to commit to an order. I for example would be number one and I would be the first to start an event. That event goes as deep and as long as we see fit, then the next event is the responsibilty of the person assigned as Number 2 and so on. If you are willing to help with this please message this blog and I’ll assign you a number! For the sake of picking this up smoothly, we will be doing a time skip. In the new canon of our roleplay we have been aboard the ship together for One Month. The first ‘event’ will be everyone freely discussing things that happened on the ship for that month and the people that were involved. Get creative! it can be anything and if you add me (the captain) to the story I will play along and bounce it with you. Please message members of the ship to let them know this is picking up again and start compiling logs!))

((-Your Captain))

Animika appears at the Cap's door wearing a wing suit, carrying 3 plates full of food for herself to eat and a smoothie. "There you go Cap! I got you that smoothie!" Her smile turns into one of anxiousness. "Please hide me. I drew "Scrabs + Books" surrounded by a heart on Scrabble's forehead and drew orange blush marks on their cheeks." She laughs hysterically. "It was a great way to get my left brain stimulated but I believe my actions are going to have major consequences."

eh whatever thats hilarious haha. come on in friend

Surely you would not impugn my honor by suggesting that I am the sort to engage in base acts of revenge? It wounds me that you think so little of me. I shall be minding my own business in the music room behind the stage, with no ill will towards anyone.

animika-theheadbard

Animika comms @scrabblezardeschlarion from the captains quarters. “awww boooooo ur no fun Scrabs”

I never claimed to be fun. Just skilled. Don’t worry, I won’t do anything I can’t undo. I may however do things that ONLY I can undo.

Animika appears at the Cap's door wearing a wing suit, carrying 3 plates full of food for herself to eat and a smoothie. "There you go Cap! I got you that smoothie!" Her smile turns into one of anxiousness. "Please hide me. I drew "Scrabs + Books" surrounded by a heart on Scrabble's forehead and drew orange blush marks on their cheeks." She laughs hysterically. "It was a great way to get my left brain stimulated but I believe my actions are going to have major consequences."

eh whatever thats hilarious haha. come on in friend

Surely you would not impugn my honor by suggesting that I am the sort to engage in base acts of revenge? It wounds me that you think so little of me. I shall be minding my own business in the music room behind the stage, with no ill will towards anyone.

myjetpack

A recent cartoon for the Guardian.

leeshajoy

Pretty sure these are all Fallen London characters.

animikachu

@scrabblezard fiendish librarian

#Out of character #obviously

It me

bogleech

It’s funny how science fiction universes so often treat humans as a boring, default everyman species or even the weakest and dumbest.

I want to see a sci fi universe where we’re actually considered one of the more hideous and terrifying species.

How do we know our saliva and skin oils wouldn’t be ultra-corrosive to most other sapient races? What if we actually have the strongest vocal chords and can paralyze or kill the inhabitants of other worlds just by screaming at them? What if most sentient life in the universe turns out to be vegetable-like and lives in fear of us rare “animal” races who can move so quickly and chew shit up with our teeth?

Like that old story “they’re made of meat,” only we’re scarier.

prokopetz

More seriously, humans do have a number of advantages even among Terrestrial life. Our endurance, shock resistance, and ability to recover from injury is absurdly high compared to almost any other animal. We often use the phrase “healthy as a horse” to connote heartiness - but compared to a human, a horse is as fragile as spun glass. There’s mounting evidence that our primitive ancestors would hunt large prey simply by following it at a walking pace, without sleep or rest, until it died of exhaustion; it’s called pursuit predation. Basically, we’re the Terminator.

(The only other animal that can sort of keep up with us? Dogs. That’s why we use them for hunting. And even then, it’s only “sort of”.)

Now extrapolate that to a galaxy in which most sapient life did not evolve from hyper-specialised pursuit predators:

Our strength and speed is nothing to write home about, but we don’t need to overpower or outrun you. We just need to outlast you - and by any other species’ standards, we just plain don’t get tired.

Where a simple broken leg will cause most species to go into shock and die, we can recover from virtually any injury that’s not immediately fatal. Even traumatic dismemberment isn’t necessarily a career-ending injury for a human.

We heal from injuries with extreme rapidity, recovering in weeks from wounds that would take others months or years to heal. The results aren’t pretty - humans have hyperactive scar tissue, among our other survival-oriented traits - but they’re highly functional.

Speaking of scarring, look at our medical science. We developed surgery centuries before developing even the most rudimentary anesthetics or life support. In extermis, humans have been known to perform surgery on themselves - and survive. Thanks to our extreme heartiness, we regard as routine medical procedures what most other species would regard as inventive forms of murder. We even perform radical surgery on ourselves for purely cosmetic reasons.

In essence, we’d be Space Orcs.

friendlyfrankenstein

Our jaws have too many TEETH in them, so we developed a way to WELD METAL TO OUR TEETH and FORCE THE BONES IN OUR JAW to restructure over the course of years to fit them back into shape, and then we continue to wear metal in out mouths to keep them in place.

We formed cohabitative relationships with tiny mammals and insects we keep at bay from bothering us by death, often using little analouge traps.

And by god, we will eat anything.

siderealsandman

We use borderline toxic peppers to season our food.

We expose ourselves to potentially lethal solar radiation in the pursuit of darkening our skin.

We risk hearing loss for the opportunity to see our favorite musicians live.

We have a game where two people get into an enclosed area and hit each other until time runs out/one of them pass out

We willingly jump out of planes with only a flimsy piece of cloth to prevent us from splattering against the ground.

Our response to natural disasters is to just rebuild our buildings in the exact same places.

We climb mountains and risk freezing to death for bragging rights

We invented dogs. We took our one time predators and completely domesticated them.

On a planet full of lions, tigers and bears, we managed to advance further and faster than any other species on the planet.

Klingons and Krogan and Orcs ain’t got shit on us

moniquill

We drink ethanol (in concentrations high enough to be used as an effective as microbicide or a solvent!) for the express purpose of achieving blood toxicity and disrupting normal brain function… AS A RECREATIONAL ACTIVITY!

On the same subject, we also deliberately incinerate assorted substances and then inhale the particulate-heavy smoke and vapor resulting for the same effect. EVEN IN THE FACE OF SAID SUBSTANCES BEING CARCINOGENIC, BECAUSE WE JUST DON’T GIVE A FUCK.

therobotmonster

Humans do not have biological castes. Kill their commander and another will take its place. Soldiers left alone on a planet will start farming and manufacturing to survive. Farmers and manufacturers will take up arms and kill you if pressed. Just because two humans look different doesn’t mean they cannot do each other’s jobs.

Breeding does not kill them. A single human can mate dozens or hundreds of times in a lifetime. They often do so as recreation. Xenobiology team six believes they do not have a mating season but this is too strange to be true.

Their appendages are not designed for hitting, so they developed special training to make them very good at hitting anyhow.

The proteins making up their bodies are toxic and cause prion disease. Do not touch anything humans have touched. Do not consume earth foods. Fire does not adequately remove this contamination.

Humans perceive sixteen times the colors we do. Do not hide in bushes or vines from humans. They can distinguish your pelt from the foliage with ease.

We tried venting waste gas into the tunnels to kill the humans when they attacked. Turns out they breathe it.

Everything on their planet came from a single biological strain. They developed comprehensive genetics BEFORE they developed space travel.

They lack radio receptors and cannot be brought into compliance with right-thought simply by broadcasting to them. Even after we learned how to translate it into sound-waves one of their hatchlings drove the Great Authority mad by responding to every demand with a single question: “Why?”

silentstep

#an individual human being is actually a microbiome in its own right—you are dealing with a legion each time you approach them #they carry pathological agents inside their deep tissues and this is advantageous to their health #one of the most widespread and resilient viruses on their planet is treated as mildly hazardous—even though it causes #massive disruption to the body’s homeostasis #(their young offspring endure multiple rhinovirus infections EACH YEAR yet they seem unperturbed by this) #they have developed such long lifespans that now their primary threat is their own body’s degeneration #humanity has literally figured out how to survive so long that their body gives out under them #and they are not satisfied with that #stupid willful vengeful survivalists who treat mortality like a challenge

littlekittenluna

I am speechless

the-persistence-of-rebecca

Reblogging so I can reread in the morning

dancinggrimm

I think I’ve reblogged this before, but it’s well worth doing again.

cozza-frenzy

This post is AWESOME. Nice to see it on my dash again in 2016.

harkaway

Nice :)

canyouevencauseicant

Such inspiration

Much facts

Wow

heraldinthedark

No, but seriously, the waste gas thing? Oxygenated atmosphere was originally a weapon from Cyanobacteria, who annihilated everything that breathed the existing atmosphere (primarily Carbon Monoxide). It’s called “The Great Oxygenation Event” in Earth’s geological history. We breathe what would most likely be poison to most recognizable alien life.

cazort

seriously though about the eating toxic things.

Humans seem to have a propensity for eating things that are poisonous to a lot of other animals, and it’s almost like we develop a symbiotic relationship with these foods and spices:

garlic and onions. these kill bacteria and yet we eat them in so many different cultures around the globe. garlic and onions are poisonous to cats and dogs.

tea and coffee, caffeine kills insects but it energizes us, also the polyphenols in tea kill a lot of bacteria, but they seem to do so selectively, so like when we drink tea it makes our gut more hospitable to the bacteria that benefit us but kills off a lot of other bacteria. oh chocolate too, poisonous to a lot of animals.

pretty much all spices and herbs, these were traditionally used to preserve foods before modern refrigeration which is why food cultures from hot climates are often more spicy. most herbs and spices are antioxidants (like preservatives) and anti-bacterial and/or anti-fungal.

null-g-deactivated20161210

A GOD AM I

k-lionheart-deactivated20171126

I need fifty pages worth of these facts

doctor-world-nexthorizon

@scrabblezardeschlarion Humans can be very dangerous.

You can never turn your back on them.

Capt'n, since we are taking off, we’re should I set course?

Pilot: set a course for Cunoa, its a ways off but its an arid planet that we can make some sales on and i can look for contracts. about three days travel

Arid as in warm? Because I was about to freeze my tail off with all those cold ocean breezes on Cass.

I'd just like to inform the Captain- and any others who reveled past their fair share last night- that I've prepared an array of milkshake and smoothie Hangover remedies, including some of the 'hair of the dog' varieties. Those are being stored in a fridge with a lock I and other galley workers have, for Flo's sake, and any others who need help resisting.

im sober thanks, but flo and scrab probably need the help.

I assure you, I need no such help. As I said, I have found ways to cheat.

#I had to intentionally put typos in #It was painful

Librarian's log, entry 10

The tenth entry in the log of Scrabblezard Eschlarion, head librarian and archivist of the glorious ship The Next Horizon.

Date: 16/05/2016 Terran Reckoning

It really does seem as though this ship is some sort of magnet for tragic pasts. We’ve got one more that spillled out since my last log, and one more hinted at. Obviously, I’m not going to mention any names, because they are not mine to mention. The only past I’m truly justified in speaking of is my own, and that certainly isn’t happening anytime soon. None of the others really compare to mine. I highly doubt any of them will have repercussions showing up in any history books. But I’ve done what I can through the decades to atempt some sort of balance.

In addition to tragic pasts, we seem to have a disstresing number of recklessly brave fools aboard. Unfortunately, several of them seem to have gravitated towards command roles. Pilot and Jero’s foolhardiness at the islands was apparently just the start. Kay seems to have a similar temperament, much to my dissmay, and we were called out to rescue her from a spiny octopus creature. When we got there, she ignored all advice and instead left her small area of safety in the belief that the creature would be friendly. Fortunately, she was correct, else she could have been torn to shreds with nothing any of us could have done about it. As it is, she was still unintentionally poisoned by the creature, as well as suffering oxygen deprivation and hypothermia. If we hadn’t been there, I doubt she would have survived.

We’ve finally left Cass, thank thee void. Apparently we’ve finished up the contract, although the clientele were not thrilled with how we did it. It seems they would have preferred a more reputable, “registered” crew. They could have mentioned this beforehand instead of kvetching about it after the job was done, but they paid anyway. Hopefully the crew’s cut will be handed out soon, because I’m running relatively low on liquid funds, and I don’t have any reserves in the area. I have some things I could sell off if necessary, but I’d rather it didn’t come up. I do wish I’d been able to gather more before getting on the Next Horizon, but I didn’t want to take the chance of being on planet when the timer went off.

The reason that I’m running out of cash is that I qersonally financed an extravagant evening for several crew members and myself last night at the Thankless Albatross, the finest tavern on Cass. I made a deal with the owner and paid a large sum for free access to whatever our table wanted for the night. I’m fairly certain we consumed far more than the value of what I paid, but it was still not a small sum. I’ personally drank enough that I am still drunk about 20 hours later, so I apologize for any spelling errors I might have made. It was a nice way to celebrate a successful mission and leaving a planet, though.

~Scrabblezard Eschlarion, head librariarian and archivist

Good Day Captain and Crew. So. I have an octopus mom now? Honestly not quite sure how that happened, I guess things went out a bit before I was rescued. From what I’m told, I got trapped in a cave about 20 miles east from the ship by a monsterously large “cactopus”, as I’ve so eloquently called it in my oxygen deprived stupor, who we originally thought was a hostile mother intent on destoying me to protect her young. Turns out she was a much less than hostile mother figure who was intent on proctecting me and that ALL of the cactopuses (cactopi?) are loving, social creatures. This one has taken it upon itself to take care of me. And by taking care of me of course I mean that, like most animals when it comes to this ship, she followed us back from the cave. Though I really should start at the beginning. After I got swept away from my team in a current I worked on exploring my way back to them and stopped in a few caves. My last coherent memory is going into the cave where the cactopus mother was, I assume that she realized I was weak and wanted to make sure I got home safely, but at this point I called to the ship in fear of a monster. A team was brought about to rescue me and they traveled to the cave, trying to use lights and the echoed sounds of the mother to lure her out so I could safely leave. But she wasn’t having it. By this time I was delerious enough to suggest the impossible, making the noises of the young and acting as if I was a child. I took the chance of swimming out to meet her and was greatly rewarded with the presence of the very intelligent octomom. We played like mother and child for a few minutes while she took care of me, cuddling. At this point though I was nearly gone and she must have known it, so when I passed out, from complications of my long underwater dive or the venom of her quills, I’m unsure which, she quickly passed me over to the rescue team and Doctor World, waiting anxiously for me to become stable. And when I did, she followed us to the ship. I hear she’s able to communicate quite well and had much fun playing with Kate and Mika while I was out cold, we should see if the cactopi can be taught sign language, though then again, I shouldn’t become to attached. We learned from this adventure that the quills contain a venom that does not harm the body in any way, but does work as a sleep inducing drug, which leads me to wonder if Doc could use it for medical purposes. I do have to take this time to apologize to both my crew members and my captain for not finishing my job and putting myself in danger, if it weren’t for the encounter with octomom I would probably not be here to write this. I must also apologize to Pilot for bringing yet another animal near the ship. On the flipside, thank you to the crew who brought me home, Mika, Kate, Scrabble and Rowan, and thank you to Dr. World for bringing me back from the brink, I owe you each my life. For now I’m stuck in bed, but I hope to be cleared soon, if not for ocean travel then ship travel. Though I can’t wait to get back to work under the water, I do have much to keep me occupied here, I’m sure octomom would love a visit.

-Kay Makenzie.

#Pretend I reblogged this in the right place to begin with

Apology accepted, but if you wish to repay me for the rescue, you’ll be more careful in the future. I’ve seen too many comrades and even entire crews fall victim to moments of recklessness, and I don’t want that to occur with this crew. I actually happen to like you lot, and would rather prefer if you all stayed alive for a while.

kaymakenzie-groundteam

Fair enough dear Scrabble. It probably would do me well to put a bit more thought into my plans.

scrabblezard

The three most important things I’ve found for success are planning, preparation, and patience. They’ve served me well over the decades.

Good Day Captain and Crew. So. I have an octopus mom now? Honestly not quite sure how that happened, I guess things went out a bit before I was rescued. From what I’m told, I got trapped in a cave about 20 miles east from the ship by a monsterously large “cactopus”, as I’ve so eloquently called it in my oxygen deprived stupor, who we originally thought was a hostile mother intent on destoying me to protect her young. Turns out she was a much less than hostile mother figure who was intent on proctecting me and that ALL of the cactopuses (cactopi?) are loving, social creatures. This one has taken it upon itself to take care of me. And by taking care of me of course I mean that, like most animals when it comes to this ship, she followed us back from the cave. Though I really should start at the beginning. After I got swept away from my team in a current I worked on exploring my way back to them and stopped in a few caves. My last coherent memory is going into the cave where the cactopus mother was, I assume that she realized I was weak and wanted to make sure I got home safely, but at this point I called to the ship in fear of a monster. A team was brought about to rescue me and they traveled to the cave, trying to use lights and the echoed sounds of the mother to lure her out so I could safely leave. But she wasn’t having it. By this time I was delerious enough to suggest the impossible, making the noises of the young and acting as if I was a child. I took the chance of swimming out to meet her and was greatly rewarded with the presence of the very intelligent octomom. We played like mother and child for a few minutes while she took care of me, cuddling. At this point though I was nearly gone and she must have known it, so when I passed out, from complications of my long underwater dive or the venom of her quills, I’m unsure which, she quickly passed me over to the rescue team and Doctor World, waiting anxiously for me to become stable. And when I did, she followed us to the ship. I hear she’s able to communicate quite well and had much fun playing with Kate and Mika while I was out cold, we should see if the cactopi can be taught sign language, though then again, I shouldn’t become to attached. We learned from this adventure that the quills contain a venom that does not harm the body in any way, but does work as a sleep inducing drug, which leads me to wonder if Doc could use it for medical purposes. I do have to take this time to apologize to both my crew members and my captain for not finishing my job and putting myself in danger, if it weren’t for the encounter with octomom I would probably not be here to write this. I must also apologize to Pilot for bringing yet another animal near the ship. On the flipside, thank you to the crew who brought me home, Mika, Kate, Scrabble and Rowan, and thank you to Dr. World for bringing me back from the brink, I owe you each my life. For now I’m stuck in bed, but I hope to be cleared soon, if not for ocean travel then ship travel. Though I can’t wait to get back to work under the water, I do have much to keep me occupied here, I’m sure octomom would love a visit.

-Kay Makenzie.

Apology accepted, but if you wish to repay me for the rescue, you’ll be more careful in the future. I’ve seen too many comrades and even entire crews fall victim to moments of recklessness, and I don’t want that to occur with this crew. I actually happen to like you lot, and would rather prefer if you all stayed alive for a while.

#the next horizon event #horizon crew

I’m sitting in the medevac ready to take off. I’ve got @rowantheengineer and @doctor-world-nexthorizon sitting with me ready to go if we can get coordinates.

In terms of good news, I've done a thorough search of the ship, and I'm quite confident that there's no nook or cranny on this ship that I don't know about now, Apart from a few stashes of magazines which I will NOT be adding to the library, I didn't find anything that shouldn't be here.

*captain hesitates before asking over the coms* as the captain i think i should over view those mags

for safety reasons. leave them in my bunk

I’m afraid I left them under the bunks where I found them. If you’d like to go looking for them, they weren’t particularly well hidden. Although you may have to explain the intrusion to a couple crew members, as I suspect not all of them were left by the previous crew.

~Scrabblezard Eschlarion

Uh, captain, we have a situation back on the ship. Apparently this was a smuggling ship before you acquired it, and there's some stuff here that even I'M not comfortable with.

oh for FUCKS SAKE

im dealing with land crap i- how immediate of a problem is it?

Most of it seems to be properly sealed, but some of it is very bad to have on the ship. Some of it really shouldn’t exist, if you ask me.

Okay, so it probably won’t explode anytime soon.

Uh, captain, we have a situation back on the ship. Apparently this was a smuggling ship before you acquired it, and there's some stuff here that even I'M not comfortable with.

oh for FUCKS SAKE

im dealing with land crap i- how immediate of a problem is it?

Most of it seems to be properly sealed, but some of it is very bad to have on the ship. Some of it really shouldn’t exist, if you ask me.

Hello everybody. This is a rp site that you can participate in even if you don’t have an account! If you want to rp with more than one person, than come on over. (This won’t be were the major storyline stuff goes unless Pilot makes one. Also it has a limit of ten unsubscribed persons.)

good day captian! me and Scrabble are in the city, and are going to check out the electromagnets that are holding the city together! (its built on a plate boundry!)

sounds interesting, have fun