In case the links donāt work, I tagged all my own work with āviascribblesā.Ā If you put the tag in the search bar or click on it under one of my works, all of them should pop up.
description: it's been six years. six years since you walked away from the man you loved. six years since the night that your own foolish actions led to the disappearance of sixteen-year-old melissa seresin. youāve spent these last few years living with crippling guilt. and after everything that happened, the last thing you are expecting is an invite to return to the camp and reassume your role as counselor. but here you are, staring in disbelief at a letter asking you to do just that. providing you with the opportunity to make things right. will you be able to come to terms with the past and allow yourself to accept this second chance? or will you let your guilt consume you?
characters: bob floyd x reader, the dagger squad as their respective characters, pete mitchell, penny benjamin, a number of my own ocs
warnings: 18+ only, mentions of death, guilt, references to sex, mentions of anxiety
series status: ongoing
listen to the playlist here!
this story is inspired by @ryebecca and this fantastic moodboard she made ; i also drew some inspiration from riley sager's the last time i lied
*this is my own original work - i do not consent to having it reposted or redistributed in any way
July 30th, 1980
1:15 am
All you felt was terror. Icy cold, like someone had shoved their frigid fingers beneath your shirt, digits pressing harsh, angry bruises into the skin while they were at it. Your arms were wrapped around yourself as you stood in the damp morning air, your eyes flitting about nervously, your gut churning with nausea.Ā
āYou do realize that your negligence in this situation is going to come with consequences, right? How could you be so stupid?!ā Penny Mitchellās voice had a sharp edge to it, despite her lowered tone. Her eyes were piercing. You couldnāt look at her.
āDonāt try to pin this all on her. Iām just as much to blame.ā That was Bobbyās voice, coming from beside you, an air of protectiveness emanating from him as he stepped closer, standing in solidarity with you.
āOh, trust me, Iām holding you responsible, too. But sheās the one who was supposed to be in charge of that cabin. If she would have been at her post, this wouldnāt have happened. But no! The two of you were off doing God knows what, while one of our campers wandered off into the night!āĀ
Penny got into your face, pointing her finger, her anger palpable, radiating off her in waves. āYou had better pray that girl is still alive, because if she winds up dead, her blood is on your hands, counselor.ā
May 18th, 1986
10:30 am
āMailās in!ā The voice of your roommate carried through your apartment, pulling your attention from the rhythmic tapping of the antique typewriter youād picked up from a yard sale. Without a second thought, you sprang from your chair, flinging open your bedroom door, bare feet quick against carpet as you hurried toward the kitchen, where Margie was just walking through the door with a stack of mail.Ā
āAny of it addressed to me?ā You asked, a hopeful inflection in your voice.Ā
Margie nodded, tossing the envelopes onto the countertop. āYeah, youāre popular, got two letters addressed to you.ā
Eagerly, you shuffled through the stack before you located the letters she was talking about. One had no definitive markings, so you had no idea where it was from. But the other had a promising logo on the frontā The Capital Gazette.
āThe Gazette sent something back!ā You exclaimed, flipping the envelope over, fingers trembling as you tore into the seal.Ā
Margie gasped, her attention immediately zeroing in on the letter you held. āWhat did they say?!ā She exclaimed, bouncing on the balls of her feet.Ā
āGimme a minute!ā You shot back as you rushed to unfold the paper. Your eyes hurriedly scanned the contents, but within moments, your shoulders fell, the thrill of hope fading away to heavy disappointment. The words we regret to inform you were all you needed to read to know what the letter was about.
āI didnāt get the job,ā came your glum statement.
āWhat?ā Margie snatched the paper off the counter when you let it drop, reading it for herself. āOh, come on! Youāre the best damn writer I know, how could they turn you down?!ā
You shook your head, fighting the tears of disappointment that had gathered on your lash line. āThey donāt need me. Theyāve got better writers.ā
āThatās bullshit!ā She huffed, shaking her head, knocking some of her unkempt curls loose from her haphazard ponytail.Ā
āWhatever,ā you said, bitterly. āThere are other newspapers I can apply to. Other magazines. People are hiring all over the place,ā you said, hoping to instill hope in your own heart. But it did little to lift your spirits.Ā
Your roommate sighed softly, reaching out to squeeze your shoulder. āIām sorry. Really.ā
āThanks, Mar. So am I.ā
Her attention shifted to the other, unopened letter on the counter. āWhatās that one say?ā
With a clueless shrug, you reached for it. All it bore was your address in handwriting that was oddly familiar. Tentatively, you tore into the envelope, brows furrowed as you unfolded the paper and began to read.
And then, āholy shit.ā
āWhat is it?ā Margie demanded, curious. When you looked at her, she noticed the expression of worry etched into your brow.Ā
āCamp Mitchell,ā you whispered.Ā
At that, the womanās eyes went wide. āOh my God.ā And then, she waved her hand, motioning you on. āWhat does it say?ā
āTheyā¦they want me to come back as a counselor.ā
I hope this letter finds you well. I am reaching out to you because I wanted to extend a formal invitation to return to camp as a counselor this summer. I know that things ended on a sour note for all of us involved, but Pete and I desire to breathe new life into this camp. We want to give other campers the chance to experience the wonder and magic of summertime at Camp Mitchell. I understand if you would prefer not to return, but it would be an honor to have you back with us again. Think we can agree to let bygones be bygones? I sure do hope so. Please give me a call at the number below and let me know if you would like to return and reassume your role as a camp counselor. Arrival deadline for counselors is May 24th. Hope to see you soon!
Best wishes,Ā
Penny Mitchell
You stared at the words in absolute shock. They wanted you to come back? After everything that had happened? After your own foolishness had resulted in a girl going missing? You had to admit, it was a bold move on Pennyās part.Ā
The police had heavily investigated you when young Melissa Seresin went missing six years prior. Penny had even blamed you for the girlās disappearance. It was hard to imagine her wanting you to come anywhere near her camp ever again.
āI need to sit down,ā you muttered, tossing the letter back onto the counter and stepping toward the kitchen table, where you hurriedly pulled out one of the chairs and lowered yourself into the seat. Two life-altering events had just taken place in the span of five minutes. You needed to process all of it.Ā
As you tried to regain your wits, Margie scanned over the letter. Then, she sauntered over to you, letting out a sigh as she pulled out the chair across from you and flopped down into it, her legs parted, arms falling down to dangle over the sides. She blew a pesky curl away from her face.Ā
Sympathetic brown eyes landed upon you, and the girl before you smiled softly. Understandingly. āWhat are you gonna do?ā
āI really donāt know,ā you said. āSince the job with The Gazette fell throughā¦I might have no choice but to take up the offer to go back to camp. At least Iād be making some kind of income during the summer while I try to figure things out.ā
Margie raised a dark brow. āListen, you do what you think is best for you. Butā¦after everything that happened there, are you sure youāre ready to go back? Itās only been six years.ā She was not coming from a place of judgment. She was coming from a place of genuine concern for her friend.Ā
You groaned softly, placing your head in your hands. āI dunno know what to do. Honestly, Iām not ready. But then again it might give me closure. And maybe thatās what Penny is thinking. If she wants to make things right with me after the way things endedā¦maybe I should go.ā
The girl sighed. āYeah, I guess closure might be something that comes outta this. I just donāt want you to have to go through all that shit again, though.ā
Your mouth quirked into a grateful smile. āI know, Mar. Iāve gotta think about it, first. Iām not making any decisions yet.ā
āWell, let me know what you decide. Whatever choice you make, Iāll support you.ā
āThanks. I appreciate it.ā
As Margie left you at the table to be alone with your thoughts, you considered the weight of the situation. It had all happened so fast, and you felt as if you were caught up in a whirlwind. You only had a week to make a decision, because you had to be at camp on the 24th if you decided to go.Ā
Were you ready to go back, after only six short years? The thought made your stomach turn. Camp Mitchell was a place that held a lot of trauma for you. Your life had fallen apart there.Ā
You had been a first-year counselor in the summer of 1980. A job meant to get you through the summer, before you returned to college in the fall. You remembered being so hopeful and excited about what the summer held.Ā
Camp Mitchell was a camp situated in Michiganās wilderness. Secluded, surrounded by forests as far as the eye could see. Quaint little wooden cabins. A mess hall. A volleyball pit. A lake. All the other amenities that a typical summer camp would have.Ā
You were put in charge of the junior/senior girls' cabin. Eleventh and twelfth graders. You were slightly intimidated because you were only a few years older than they were. You worried that they would not respect you. But much to your relief, the girls accepted you with open arms.Ā
Throughout the many weeks of camp, you bonded with several different girls who passed through your cabin. But none of them connected as well with you as Melissa Seresin.Ā
July 1980
She was the younger sister of one of the other counselors, Jake Seresin, and she was sweet as could be. She attended camp most of the summer, because her brother worked there, and she didnāt want to remain stuck at home alone while her parents traveled for the summer.Ā
So, she tagged along with Jake. Unlike her brother, she was not cocky. She had a very kindhearted demeanor. A little spoiled, once in a while, due to being the youngest and only girl of rich parents and a doting older brother, but nothing you couldnāt tolerate.Ā
Melissa remained a semi-permanent fixture in your cabin, even as groups of girls from different places ā schools, church youth groups, family groups, so on and so forth ā passed through all summer.Ā
She knew the camp like the back of her hand, and had spent a few summers there already. You didnāt have to worry about her like you might other campers, because she was well aware of the campās procedures.Ā
That was why it was so jarring when, one night in the middle of the summer, she disappeared without a trace.Ā
Late one night, after lights out, the girls in your cabin noticed her absence. Melissa was always in bed come lights out. Not always asleep, but certainly always present. Her neatly made, unoccupied bed raised suspicions, but it was her missing backpack that made the girls think that she had left altogether.
You were not at your post like you were supposed to be. Earlier that night, you had enforced lights out, but soon after had slipped out into the night to meet someone. The girls ranged from fifteen to eighteen years old, so you were not particularly concerned about them getting up to mischief. But in your haste to leave, you neglected to double-check that Melissa was present.Ā
To your utter shame, you had left to meet up with another counselor. The head counselor of the seventh and eighth-grade boys' cabin, Robert Floyd. Bob to his friends. Mr. Bob to the campers. Bobby to you, and only you.Ā
It wasnāt in your nature to sneak around. Neither was it in Bobās. But you had gotten tangled up in an impassioned summer fling, and you took advantage of every free moment you had to be together.Ā
It was in that time span of you and Bob sneaking off to the lake, that Melissa had gone missing. And when you returned to the cabin an hour later, the girls were all awake, in a slight state of upheaval.Ā
āWhere have you been?!ā Asked Claudia, one of the senior girls. āI was about to leave and go find Mrs. Mitchell!ā
āI needed some air. Why, whatās up?ā You cautiously asked.Ā
Claudia motioned to Melissaās empty bed. āMelissa never made it in for lights out.ā
You stared at the bed, its covers untouched and meticulously tucked in, as a hotel bed would be. That was the way she made it every morning. She hadnāt been in that bed since last night. āNo, she was here when I left!ā You insisted.Ā
āUm, no she wasnāt,ā Marissa, another senior, piped up. āPlus, her backpack is gone.ā
āOh, God. Well, thatās my bad for sure. Okay, um, Iām sure she canāt have gotten far. She knows this camp well. Donāt worry, Iāll go take a look around. The rest of you, stay put. Lemme just do a count to make sure nobody else went off with her.ā
After a headcount, you came up with fourteen girls. Melissa would make fifteen, so she was the only one missing. Huffing out a sigh, and attempting to keep yourself calm and neutral so the girls wouldnāt panic, you squared your shoulders.
āIāll go grab another counselor and weāll take a look. Claudia, youāre the oldest, so youāre in charge. Make sure no one leaves. The rest of you, try to get some sleep. I know youāre a little freaked right now but itās gonna be okay.ā The biggest lie you could have told them. It was, in fact, not going to be okay.
āWhat should we do if she comes back?ā Claudia asked, running a nervous hand through her thick brunette locks. Her dark eyes were fearful, although she was trying to appear brave, just as you were trying to do.Ā
āJust make sure she stays put. Iāll come back and check in a bit, if I donāt find her, and we can touch base then.ā
Once you were certain the girls understood the plan, you excused yourself again, stepping out into the humid July night. Crickets sang as you ambled down the path that led to the boysā cabins, but the pounding of your heart in your ears drowned out the sound.Ā
Your hands shook, unsteady as you held your flashlight before you. Tears blurred your vision, and the heat of embarrassment washed over you. How could you be so stupid? Here you were, off getting laid while one of your girls was nowhere to be found.
You had to look for her, but you werenāt going to do it alone. Hurriedly, you ascended the steps of cabin 13, the first of the boysā cabins. Light on your feet, so as not to step on any squeaky boards, you crept closer to the door.Ā
Three soft raps, five seconds apart. That was your code. And sure enough, within moments, the door inched open, and there was your Bobby. You had just seen him twenty minutes prior, but heād already changed into his sleep clothes. An old camp shirt and basketball shorts.Ā
Brow furrowed, he quietly closed the door behind him, stepping out onto the porch. You reached for his hand and guided him off the porch, onto the soft, sandy ground. āWhatās goinā on, Kit?ā He asked. The nickname heād dubbed you for reasons so much more lighthearted than the situation you were facing.
āMelissaās gone,ā you whispered. āThe girls said she was never there for lights out.ā
āHuh? But you checked on them before you left.ā
āI did, but Iā¦I guess I just missed Melissa. I thought she was there, but tonight was so chaoticā¦God, I canāt believe I could be so stupidā You despaired.
āShh,ā Bob soothed, reaching out to run comforting hands down your arms. āHey, she probably just went for a walk. Iām not close to her, but I know she likes to go and write in that journal of hers a lot. Sheās probably doing that.ā
āBut thatās not like her. Yeah, she writes in her diary but sheās never done this before. Justā¦up and left like that. Iām scared, Bobby. I think something mightāve happened to her. And itās all my fault.ā
But he was already shaking his head. āNo, donāt even let your mind go there. Youāll drive yourself crazy.ā His hands had moved to cup your cheeks. āTell you what, Iāll help you look for her. If we donāt find her in the next hour, we can tell Penny and get a search party goinā.ā
You prayed it wouldnāt come to that, but the sick feeling in your gut told you otherwise. It was your fault, no matter how much Bobby tried to assure you it wasnāt. If Melissa was truly missing, then you were the one to blame. But you didnāt dare speak it into the air. You couldnāt.
āO-okay. We can look together, then.ā
And so, the two of you set off on the search for Melissa Seresin. Missy, as her brother liked to call her. You thought of Jake, who was in charge of the senior boysā cabin. You knew heād be pissed that you didnāt wake him up immediately and tell him what was going on. He was very protective of his baby sister. But you didnāt want to involve him just yet. You had to try to find her yourself, first.Ā
You set out to search all the places she frequented. Melissa wasnāt as outgoing as her brother. She had a vibrant personality, but also had introverted tendencies. She cherished her alone time, so it wasnāt odd for her to be at the lake, or the horse stables, writing. But she was always visible, and she had never sneaked off before. And certainly not after dark, either.Ā
These woods were terrifying at night. It was easy to get lost in their vastness. Even a girl who knew her way around could get lost. But you prayed that wasnāt the case.Ā
You took to searching her usual hangout spots. The lake, even though you and Bob had been there a half hour ago, and hadnāt seen her. Sure enough, she wasnāt there. Then, you took a peek in the horse stables. The camp had not yet obtained horses to occupy the stables, so it was just an empty building.
Hopeful, you followed Bob inside, holding your breath as he called out, āMelissa? You in here, honey? Itās Bob Floyd.ā
But you were met with dead silence, so deafening it brought a shiver down your spine. āOh, my God. Sheās gone. Sheās gone forever. This is all my fault!ā You panicked, burying your face in your hands.Ā
Bobby, ever the calm and steady one, gently soothed you. āHey. Hey! Look at me.ā
You lifted your tearful eyes to his face, illuminated by the yellow glow of your flashlight.Ā
āItās gonā be okay, alright? Weāll find her. We just need to go get Penny and Pete and tell āem what happened. We can get a search party organized. Weāll cover more ground that way.ā
Lovingly, he took your hand, and together, you made the trek back toward the main part of camp, where the office, mess hall, and staff quarters were. The entire walk, your mind was spiraling with all the possibilities of what could have happened to Melissa.Ā
Something was wrong. You knew it.Ā
And, as it would turn out, you were, unfortunately, right. Melissa Seresin never was found. Not when you and the other counselors organized a search party. Not when the police got involved. Not when Jake and Melissaās dad, an agent in the FBI, got his team involved. It was as if sheād vanished into thin air. Gone without a trace.
Jake blamed you. But that was okay, because you blamed yourself, too.Ā
Your own negligence was the reason Melissa was gone. And the police grilled you for it. Much to your utter relief, the Seresins chose not to press charges. But you were left to live with the guilt, and that was punishment enough.
And now, here you were. Six years later. Wounds from the past only partially healed. Presented with an opportunity to go back to the place where it all started, and ended. If you did return, would those wounds reopen, and drain the blood from your veins? Or would those wounds finally heal?
And most importantly, did you have the guts to find out?
One Week Later
A ticket reading Harper, Michigan was clutched tightly in your hand, the paper rumpling from your grip. Your suitcase and duffel bag were beside you, as you stood at the bus depot, waiting for the Greyhound to pull up and take you to your destination.
āI still think youāre crazy for this,ā Margie spoke from beside you. Sheād come to see you off.Ā
You turned to her, taking in her soft smile, despite her disapproval of your choice. āI know,ā you replied.Ā
āBut I also understand why you want to do this. I really hope it gives you the closure youāre looking for.ā
You threw your arms around your friendās shoulders, hugging her tight. āThanks, Mar. Iāll try to give you a call at some point in the next few weeks, but the only phone on the property is the one in the main office and I doubt Iāll have time.ā
āDonāt worry about it. You can tell me all about it when you get back,ā she assured you.Ā
You took one last good look at her, as you knew you wouldnāt see her for a few months, if you fulfilled your commitment to work the entire camp season. The late morning sun shone down from the sky, illuminating her dark curls. Always so unkempt, but the style suited her.Ā
āIāll be seeing ya,ā you finally said.
She nodded, squeezing your hand. āTake care of yourself. And good luck.ā
The bus pulled into the stop as you bid your final goodbyes, and then, you handed off your luggage to the attendant to pack away beneath the bus before you climbed the steps into the large vehicle, flashing your ticket to the driver. You took a seat toward the back, settling in and placing your purse beside you, hoping that you would get two of the tackily upholstered seats all to yourself.Ā
As soon as you were settled, you fished your Walkman out of your bag, unraveling the headphones and placing them on your head. As soon as you hit play, the opening sound of the 1975 Eagles album, One of These Nights, filled your ears.
You had purposely chosen this tape to accompany you on your trip, because it held a lot of nostalgic memories for you. Namely, it had been a gift from your Bobby. Heād given it to you in the beginning stages of your romance, after youād expressed to him that the album was one of your favorites.
āI want you to have it,ā he insisted. āA memento that you can have all the time, to remind you of what a great time we had together here.ā
And you did have a great time. But the trauma of Melissaās disappearance had soured the whole thing. All you had left of Bobby was this tape, and a few braided jute bracelets he had made you, from plant fibers. You still wore them on your wrist to this day.Ā
He had tried to keep in contact with you after the camp shut down. Heād sent letters. Called your home phone. But you never answered. As much as you loved him, the reminder of what had happened was too painful, and you let your connection to him fizzle out.Ā
But as you listened to the familiar cords, a rush of memories flooded you, the wave so intense that it took your breath away. Flashes of Bobās beautiful face. Twinkling eyes, blushing cheeks, a crinkled button nose. The prettiest laughter youād ever heard.
Large, warm hands exploring. Lips trailing searing kisses down your sternum. Whispers of your name. Groans of plā
With a gasp, you snatched the headphones off your head, eyes flickering about, as if someone around you could have heard your thoughts. But everyone else was in their own little world, completely oblivious to the salacious flashbacks you had just experienced.
But they made you warm with shame nonetheless.Ā
Youād be foolish not to admit that youād thought of Bobby over the years. Looked back on your encounters with fondness. With desire. Youād been sexually involved with a few other people since then, but the entire time, you could only think of him. It was why youād stopped seeing other people. They werenāt your Bobby.Ā
You wondered if he thought about you, too.
More importantly, you wondered if heād be returning to Camp Mitchell like you were. Were you ready to face him again? The thought made your stomach flutter with butterflies.Ā
You imagined heād moved on. He had to. Hell, he probably had a wife and kids already. Imagining such a thing sent a queasy rush through you. You still werenāt over him, and you supposed you never would be. He was your first great love.Ā
But he wasnāt the only person you would potentially face from your past.Ā
Your mind went to the other counselors youād worked with that fateful summer. Specifically, you thought of Jake Seresin. Surely he wouldnāt return to camp, right? Not after his baby sister had disappeared from that very place. It had to be too painful for him.Ā
Little did you know, everyone you had worked with was also traveling from their own respective homes and cities, headed right for Camp Mitchell, just like you were.Ā
The camp was founded by Pete and Penny Mitchell, a husband and wife duo. They had started it with the best of intentions. It was in its fifth successful year when you came on staff. And that just so happened to be the last year it was in operation.Ā
Until now.Ā
What had made the couple decide it was a good idea to reopen the camp, you had no idea. But you were going to give it a chance. Maybe it wouldnāt be so bad, after all.Ā
But several hours later, as the Greyhound pulled into the station in Harper, a tiny town boasting of a general store, a bus depot, and a long, winding road that led up to the camp itself.Ā
As you stepped off the bus, you realized one very important detail: you had no idea how you were even getting up to the camp. Would they send a driver down to retrieve everyone?Ā
Your question was soon answered when you caught sight of a large white poster board propped against a nearby lamppost. CAMP MITCHELL STAFF WAIT HERE. A DRIVER WILL ESCORT YOU TO CAMP.Ā
With a sigh, you rolled your suitcase over to the post, hoping you wouldnāt have to wait long. And you didnāt. About five minutes later, an old teal-colored truck came down the road, its engine obnoxiously loud. On the side, Camp Mitchell was printed in bold letters.Ā
You straightened, smoothing out your travel-rumpled clothes as you grabbed your belongings, prepared to help load everything into the truck. It didnāt even occur to you that you might know the driver. You expected to meet someone entirely new.Ā
As soon as the vehicle pulled to a stop at the curb, you were already moving to the truck bed, hoisting your duffel bag over the side, letting it land with a satisfying thump.Ā
āHere, let me,ā a familiar voice spoke up, and in moments, a pair of hands were stealing your suitcase away, heaving it into the bed.Ā
You looked up at the man assisting you, and your blood ran cold. As he turned from putting your luggage in place, he froze, too. Wide blue eyes, no longer hidden beneath a pair of wireframes, locked with your own.Ā
You didnāt speak. You couldnāt.Ā
But he did. In a voice as smooth and soft as butter, yet breathless with surprise. āKit?āĀ
You squeezed your eyes shut.Ā
Kit. The nickname heād dubbed you six years ago. It was something so simple. So silly. Youād had an affinity for KitKat bars that summer. They were the only candy bars you liked from the camp store. As a joke, Bobby had said āI should call you KitKat, since you like those things so much.ā
And thus, it was shortened to Kit. The name stuck.Ā
Hearing it again made your head spin. You felt woozy on your feet. You swayed a little. A memory flashed in your mind. You and him. Sitting under the old weeping willow. His fingertips wiping chocolate from the corner of your mouth.Ā
It sent a burning ache through your chest.Ā
āOh my God,ā you whispered. āB-Bobby.ā The first words youād spoken to him in six years.Ā
He let out a breath, shaking his head in disbelief. āI didnāt think youād show.āĀ
You gathered yourself, trying to regain your composure. āI didnāt either,ā you whispered.Ā
He offered a tentative smile. āThat doesnāt mean Iām not happy to see you, though.ā
You lifted your head, brow furrowed in confusion. āYou are?ā
āGosh, I am. Itās been too long. I didnātā¦didnāt know what happened to you. You never responded to my calls or letters. I thought maybeā¦ā He wouldnāt speak it out loud. He couldnāt.Ā
But you inferred what he meant from his tone. Heād feared that the trauma of what had happened had been too much for you to handle. That youād succumbed to it all.Ā
āI was working on myself. Trying to heal.ā
He nodded. āUnderstandable.ā The corners of his eyes crinkled as he smiled again. āI really am glad to see you, though. You look well.ā
You shrugged. āIām workinā on it. And Iām glad to see you too.ā
You looked at him, really looked at him, and you realized how much heād changed, but also stayed the same. Heād filled out. His shoulders were more broad. Muscular. His glasses were gone, presumably replaced with contacts. His hair, once close-cropped, was longer now, curling at the nape of his neck, peeking out from beneath the baseball cap he wore. His jaw was shadowed with stubble.Ā
He looked like a man.Ā
But there was still that boyish glint in his eyes, and hiding behind his smile. Still that same gentleness reserved particularly for you. It was overwhelming, and you could feel your chest beginning to tighten.Ā
āAre you, uh, are you ready to head up there? Or do ya need a minute?ā Bobby asked, his voice low. Laced with concern.Ā
You stepped back. āI thought I could do this. Maybe I canāt.ā
He let you have your space. āTake all the time you need.ā
The rush of memories flooding you was overwhelming. The last time you saw him. The last thing you said to him.Ā
Six Years Ago
The day you left camp, it was raining. Pouring from the sky in sheets, washing everything in a gray hue that made the world look like a watercolor painting.Ā
The sandy ground squashed beneath your feet as you walked toward that old truck, with the campās logo on the side. Your luggage was stuffed into the truck bed, wrapped in plastic garbage bags so it wouldnāt get wet in the downpour.Ā
As you climbed into the cab, Bobby came running out of the main office, making a beeline for the truck. He scrambled to wrench open the door and join you inside, breathing labored as he settled into the seat.Ā
For a few moments, it was silent, save for the sound of him moving to start the engine. He fiddled with the heat dial, hoping to reduce the fog on the windows, as the rain had made the air unseasonably chilly that morning.Ā
You both sat there, staring out the windshield, watching the water trickle down the glass. He made no move to put the truck in gear.Ā
āIām sorry,ā he murmured.Ā
āBobbyāā
āNo, listen to me. Iām sorry it came to this. It shouldnāt have.ā
āWhatās done is done. Please, letās just get out of here. I canāt stay in this place another minute.ā
Bobby lingered for a moment, his eyes on you, even as you refused to look at him. You were afraid that if you did, youād melt into a fit of tears. So, with a soft sigh, he put the truck in drive, and began the journey down the winding dirt road that led out of camp.Ā
The trip was silent. You had nothing left to say, because youād exhausted all your words these last few weeks. Countless hours of interrogation. Recounting that night over and over again. The conclusion was that a girl was missing, and it likely would not have happened if youād been doing your job. That was a sense of guilt that you would have to live with for the rest of your life.
Bob pulled into the bus station fifteen minutes later, and you didnāt hesitate as you hurried to slide out of your seat, shoes colliding with wet asphalt. Your chest was tight, eyes blurring with tears as you rushed to grab your luggage.Ā
āWould ya stop for a minute?!ā Bobby exclaimed, reaching out to gently grab at your arm.Ā
But you jerked away from him. āPlease, donātā¦donāt make this harder than it is,ā you whispered.
He stared at you, brilliant blue eyes wide, filled with emotion. āSo, what, you wonāt even say goodbye?ā
You feared that saying goodbye would break the dam, and you wouldnāt be able to hold yourself together. Youād fall into his arms, sobbing your heart out, and you would never get on that bus. The man before you sighed, shaking his head before he moved to haul your suitcase out of the truck, placing the plastic-covered bag on the sidewalk.Ā
āThatās it then?ā He spoke, his tone grim.
Squaring your shoulders, you nodded, forcing yourself to hold it together. āGoodbye, Robert.ā
You turned to leave, and he watched you go, his heart falling to pieces within him. He was losing you, perhaps forever, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He wanted to go after you. Wanted to shake you and tell you to just listen. But you were so entrenched in the trauma of what had happened that he wasnāt sure you could listen to reason at all.
So he let you leave. He watched you climb onto that Greyhound, bound for home, all while he was left there with a wound in his heart, wishing that things could have ended differently. Wishing that your love for each other had been enough to keep you with him.
But it wasnāt enough. He wasnāt enough. And that was something he had to live with.
May 1986
Seeing you again was a lot for him. You were just as beautiful as he remembered. Even more so, now, if that was possible. He was also hit with a rush of emotions. He never thought heād see you again. When heād received the letter from Penny, inviting him back to camp, he had thought about you, and was sure you wouldnāt come back.
But here you were, standing before him, uncertain and anxious, and he found himself wanting nothing more than to pull you into his arms and comfort you. But he kept his distance, not wanting to invade your personal space. You werenāt his any longer. He could not touch you the way he used to.Ā
You took a moment to pull yourself together, taking a deep breath, counting to ten, trying to ground yourself. Then, you fixed your posture, and nodded in Bobās direction. āAlright. I thinkā¦I think Iām okay. We can, um, we can leave if youāre ready.ā
āOkay. Letās go then.ā He opened the passenger door for you, and you climbed into that old truck once again, just as you had six years ago.Ā
Everything had come full circle.
Bobby rounded the truck and settled into the driverās seat, and soon, heād started the engine, pulling away from the curb, turning onto the road that led up to camp. Your gut churned with anxiety. You were really doing this. There was no turning back now.Ā
The radio played softly as Bob drove. Some old country song. Hank Williams, you thought. Its grainy, peaceful tune did well to calm your anxiety. Your hands had stopped trembling.
āItās been a while,ā the man beside you murmured. His accent seemed to have gotten thicker, a slight twang to it.Ā
āI know,ā you replied, staring down at your lap. Then, āGod, Iām so sorry, Bobby. I shouldnāt have gone no contact like I did. I got the letters you sent. And I got every message you left on my answering machine. But I justā¦I couldnāt bring myself to respond.ā
He shook his head. āNo, I get it. I shouldāve given you more space. I know everything that happened was a lot for you.ā
āBut thatās no excuse for me to just ignore you. It wasnāt right of me. Iām really sorry.ā
āApology accepted. Itās in the past, Kit. We can leave it there.ā
It was that easy. A soothing sense of relief washed over you, warming you from head to toe. That exchange made you feel a little more at ease, and the conversation soon shifted.
āDid everyone come back this year?ā
He nodded, humming lowly. āMost of āem, surprisingly. Bradley, Natasha, Mickey, Reuben, Javy. Half got here last night. The rest came earlier this morninā.ā
You hesitated, picking at a jagged nail on your right hand. āAndā¦Jake?ā
Bob was silent for a moment, his jaw tightening. āYeah, him too.ā
You recoiled in confusion. āButā¦why would he come back?ā
āPenny didnāt say it in her letter, but theyāre doing a dedication ceremony for Melissa. Thereās a new garden area they installed in the main part of camp. Itās gonna be called Melissa Joās Garden. They had a plaque made and everything. Jake agreed to come for the ceremony. I dunno if heās staying all summer though.ā
āOh.ā It felt like all the oxygen had been sucked from your lungs. You had not left things on a good note with Jake. He harbored deep resentment toward you for neglecting to watch over your cabin. He blamed you for his sisterās disappearance.Ā
āHe seems to be handling everything alright. He might actually be okay with seeing you again.ā
But you werenāt so sure. There was that nervousness again, roiling in your gut. Did you have the nerve to face him? And how would he react? You doubted heād welcome you back with open arms.Ā
Youād soon find out, because just up ahead, the Camp Mitchell sign could be seen. Large, deep green in color, with white lettering. So familiar, yet so foreign all at once.Ā
You couldnāt believe you were back. What if this turned out to be the most foolish decision youād ever made?
You didnāt have time to consider that, because Bobby was pulling into the common area in no time, and killing the engine. It was time to face the past youād been running like hell to get away from.Ā
As Bob got out to gather your luggage, you pushed the old, squeaky passenger door open and let your feet land in the soft sand.Ā
The scent of pine and honeysuckle filled your nose. It sent an intense wave of nostalgia through you. So much had changed, and yet nothing had, all at the same time.Ā
The layout was still the same. Clinic. Main office. Mess hall. Common area. But in the middle of the main entrance was a small garden. Stone paths weaved throughout. Spindly bushes, multicolored flowers, and other plants decorated the soil. Right in the middle of the garden was what appeared to be a large stone, covered with a tarp. You assumed the plaque for Melissa was hidden beneath the tarp.Ā
And then, a voice caught your attention. You looked up to find Penny Mitchell approaching you. Blue cotton shorts, accessorized with a belt. A blue and white striped t-shirt tucked into them. A pair of hiking boots were on her feet. Practical, that one was. Always ready for an outdoor excursion at a momentās notice.
You braced yourself, unsure of how she would behave toward you. She had rightfully held you responsible for Melissaās disappearance, and you werenāt sure if sheād moved on from that. But, if sheād invited you back, she had to have at least found it in her heart to forgive you. You hoped so, anyway.Ā
āWelcome!ā She said, sweeping her arms out in greeting. āIām glad you could make it!ā
āOh, um, thanks. Meā¦me too,ā you said, unsure of the proper response.Ā
Bobby sidled up beside you. You didnāt feel so alone with him there.
āDid Bob fill you in on everything on the drive up?ā
āKinda, yeah,ā came your answer.
Penny nodded. āOnce everyone is settled, Pete and I will take you on a tour. Weāve made a lot of changes these last few months.ā Then she looked at Bob. āWould you show her to her cabin? Weāll put her in cabin five.ā
āSure thing,ā he replied.
āWeāll have a little orientation meeting after dinner. Thereās a whole itinerary we have to go over. I put a schedule in your cabin. Any questions?ā
Yeah, lots. You stared at her for a moment. āWhy?ā
āWhy what?ā
āWhy did you invite me back? After everything that happened?ā
She regarded you silently, her expression neutral. Then, she said, āBecause I believe in second chances. Or, rather, my husband does. He wanted to bring all of you back and start with a clean slate. Whether or not youāve earned that second chance remains to be seen. But I hope you have.ā Her words sent a painful ache through your chest. You didnāt blame her for being wary of you, but it still hurt.Ā
As she excused herself, you were once again left alone with Bobby. āYāalright?ā He gently asked, cadence low and comforting.
You processed his words for a moment. āYeahā¦yeah. Iām okay.ā
āYou need a minute?ā
āNo. Letās just get my stuff to my cabin.ā
With a single nod, he grabbed your suitcase and duffel bag, moving to walk up the hill. You followed closely behind, letting the rush of memories ebb through you. The cabins were small, build from dark wood, with green paint detailing the shutters and doors. They looked like theyād received fresh coats of paint, but otherwise, everything was still the same.
It didnāt take long to reach cabin five. Bob carried your things inside, and you slowly followed, your heart quickening as you stepped through the door. The scent of cedar and pine was familiar and painful all at once.Ā
This wasnāt the cabin youād been in when you were here last. You were in cabin two then, just one over from this one. Even so, it looked so eerily similar that for a moment, you were transported back to the summer of 1980.
Funnily enough, Bob had been the one to show you to your cabin for the first time that year, too.
āYouāve still got āem.ā
Your eyes flickered to him, and your brow furrowed. āHuh?ā
āThe bracelets I made you.ā
Oh. You looked down, eyeing your wrist, where the two braided jute bracelets remained, from when heād made them for you that year. Dyed faintly with berry juice. Fraying at the edges, but still intact. āUm, yeahā¦I do. Guess I just could never bring myself to take them off.ā
He stepped forward, reaching his hand out. You let him gingerly take your wrist into his palm. His fingers brushed against the braided rope, and his touch sent goosebumps across your skin. āAfter all these years,ā he whispered, afraid that if he spoke any louder, his voice would fail him.
All at once, you were floored with an intense wave of emotion, so powerful it nearly drove you to your knees. It hit you out of nowhere, like a gut punch. āBobby,ā you whimpered.
Shocking blue flickered to meet your wide-eyed gaze, and his face crumpled, bottom lip quivering. āKit.ā
You werenāt sure who moved first, but you were in each otherās arms then, holding on tightly, as if the other would float away if you loosened your grip. The sound of soft sobs reached your ears, and you realized that they were coming from you.
āI never should have walked away from you. Never, ever!ā You cried against his chest. āIām sorry!ā
āNo, shhh,ā he soothed, cradling your head against him. āDonāt do this to yourself. Itās okay, youāre forgiven.ā
You pulled back to look at him, shaking your head. āItās not okay!ā
Two large hands came up to hold your face. āIt hurt me, alright? Iāll admit that. Broke my heart in two. But I never held it against you, becauseā¦because I knew everything youād been through. I know that summer was the worst time of your life. It made sense to me if you didnāt want to speak to me ever again. I wouldāve just been a reminder of everything that happened.ā
āBut I did want to talk to you, Bobby. I did. I just couldnāt get past the goddamn trauma.ā
He shook his head, his face kind. āI know. But weāre here now, together. Thatās gotta count for something.ā Maybe weāve been given a second chance, he wanted to say, but he didnāt want to move too fast. He was well aware that your romance might never be rekindled. However, he was content to just remain friends with you if it meant that you would be in his life again.
You went quiet, letting your head fall against his chest again. You couldnāt believe you were here, standing in the middle of a cabin at the place where you had lost everything. It felt so surreal. It was as if a million years had passed since you saw him here last, and yet, it also felt like no time had passed at all.Ā
There was so much that needed to be discussed. But there was no hurry. For now, you were just relieved to know that you had not burned a bridge with your first great love. If nothing else went right for you this summer, he was the one good thing that would come out of it.Ā
āIām gladā¦Iām glad it was you who picked me up at the station,ā you admitted.
Bobby smiled softly. āSo am I.ā He searched your face, as if memorizing it. āI really thought I wouldnāt ever see you again.ā
You hummed in agreement. āMe too. But I guess fate wanted us to meet again.ā
āSheās a tricky one, that Fate.ā
āDonāt I know it.ā
Finally, he parted from you, though the absence of his body made yours feel cold. He didnāt want to overstep. āWellā¦I guess Iāll let you get settled.ā He moved toward the door, but your voice gave him pause.
āActually, wait for me. I donāt want to face everyone alone. Iād prefer it if we walked together.ā Bobby might be the only person in this damn place to accept you again. You wanted to cling to that, and the security it provided.
He gave a single nod. āAlright. You want any help getting settled, then?ā
Together, you set about getting everything situated. Bob went around and checked the cabin for spiders, because he knew you werenāt a fan of the little (and sometimes big) guys. He found one, which he very gently coaxed into his hand (murmuring ācāmon, little buddyā as he did) and released it outside.Ā
Once you had your stuff organized, and did a quick clean sweep of the cabin, you were ready to join everyone else. There was a paper posted on the wall just beside the door, detailing the itinerary for counselors and other camp staff. In about fifteen minutes, dinner would be served in the mess hall.Ā
Directly following that, there would be an orientation meeting in the meeting hall, a place where staff meetings usually took place. Assemblies with the campers were also held there. It ws in that hall that you would be forced to face people from your past. Namely, youād have to face Jake again.Ā
The thought made your stomach churn, and your hands tremble. But then, Bobās gentle presence brought you back to the presence, and your racing heart calmed down a little.Ā
He offered you a kind smile. āYou ready?ā
āYeah,ā you said with a nod.
Together, you walked out of that cabin and into the camp grounds, falling into silence as your steps synced up. There were so many things Bobby wanted to say, but he didnāt want to inundate you with questions and confessions, so he left it. He knew you had to be terribly overwhelmed as it was. He didnāt want to be the cause of more stress.
So, silence it was, all the way until you got to the mess hall. He stopped to open the door for you, and you hesitated.Ā
āItās okay,ā he assured you. āIāll be right here with you the whole time.ā
You liked the sound of that.Ā
So, with a deep breath and squared shoulders, you stepped through that door, entering the room. Dark wood stretched out before you. The mess hall was a similar design to the cabins, just much bigger. High ceilings with unfinished wooden beams. Wooden floors and walls. Dark green paint detailing. Windows on each wall to let in natural light. A large stone fireplace in the middle of the room.Ā
It was very cozy, but as your gaze shifted to the table of faces to your left, you felt a chill run over you. Here goes nothing.
You appraoched the table, taking in each person seated there. At the head of the table was Pete Mitchell, Pennyās husband. He lifted his head and offered a smile, but you couldnāt quite place the look in his eyes. Beside him, Penny glanced up at you.
Then, to her right, you saw Natasha Trace. Another person you had once had a connection with. She was good friends with Bobby before you met him. The two of them had gone to school, and eventually college, together. Beside her was a woman youād never seen before, but judging by the way Natasha held her hand, you inferred that they were in a relationship. It was no surprise to you. Nat had always made it clear that she only had eyes for women.
Then, on the other side of the woman was Mickey Garcia, another one of Bobās good friends. His best friend, in fact. Mickey offered you a smile, and you took that as acceptance of you. He always had been rooting for you, all those summers ago.
Beside Mickey was Javy Machado. You couldnāt get a read on him. His face bore a neutral expression as he regarded you. Back then, heād been best friends with Jake, and had therefore been completely on his side. You assumed the sentiment was still the same.Ā
Then, of course, there was Bradley Bradshaw. He was Pete and Pennyās surrogate son, in a way. After Bradleyās mother died when he was a teenager, Pete had brought him on to learn how to run the camp. One day, he would take charge of the place, after the husband and wife duo retired.
All of them were seated around that table, but you noticed that one was missing. You had no idea where Jake was. Maybe he wasnāt joining everyone for dinner. Maybe heād left. A part of you hoped so.
āWanna sit here?ā Bobby asked, motioning to two seats next to Bradley.Ā
You nodded, and he pulled out your chair for you. Once you were seated, he took his own seat beside you, between Bradley and you. The other man leaned over the table, and you got a look at his face for the first time in six years. Heād lost his baby face, and was now sporting a defined jaw. A neatly kept mustache shadowed his upper lip. You thought it suited him. āGood to see you again,ā he said.
Bradleyās statement seemed to break the ice, and a few murmurs of greeting echoed around the table. Even still, an air of awkwardness hovered over the group. You wanted to crawl out of your own skin. But you were here now, and there was no turning back.Ā
The food was set up around the table like a regular family dinner. Simple foods. Sandwiches. Veggies and dip. Chips. You grabbed a sandwich, but you found your stomach in knots, and the thought of eating anything nauseated you.Ā
āWell, Penny, you did it. Got us all to come back. Good on you,ā Natasha spoke up.
Penny shrugged. āPete and I have been talking about it for a while. I know the way things ended back in ā80 wasā¦bad, to say the least. But we really feel that this place has potential, and we could breathe new life into it.ā
āWhat do the Seresins think about that?ā Javy asked, his brow raised.
āWe think itās an okay idea,ā a voice spoke up from across the room.Ā
The group looked up all at once to see the man stepping through the door. You tensed, taking in a breath. Your heart rate picked up, thudding against your chest as the chill of anxiety crawled along your spine.Ā
āReally?ā Natasha piped up.
Jake nodded as he approached the group. āYeah. Seeing as how Penny wants to dedicate this place to Missy. We all remember how much she loved it here. I firmly believe sheād want it to keep going.ā
Penny smiled. āIām glad weāre on the same page, Jake.ā
He stopped at the empty end of the table, hands coming up to rest upon the back of the chair there. āBut I do have one question.āĀ
āWhatās that?ā The woman asked.
Jake smiled, but you could tell is wasnāt a real smile. In fact, when you looked at his eyes, the pale green was filled with snakeās venom. āWhat the fuck is she doing here?ā He jabbed his finger in your direction, and you froze, your eyes growing wide.
That was more like the reaction youād been expecting.Ā
Penny faltered, her smile fading. Beside you, you felt Bob stiffen. But you didnāt dare pull your eyes away from Jakeās accusatory glare.Ā
āI-I just thought thatāā
āI donāt care. Look, Penny; I really appreciate you putting this all together, but in what world did you think it was okay to invite the person who had a hand in my sisterās disappearance?ā
āShe isnāt the one who wanted to invite her. I am.ā Pete stood from his seat, his eyes narrow. āI thought that she deserved a second chance. And I wanted you to find it in yourself to allow her that chance.ā
āOh, really? What, is she gonna bring my sister back? Hm?ā Jakeās gaze was so cold. You wished the ground would swallow you up. How on earth could you have thought this was a good idea?
āNo, butāā
āIf she stays, Iām refusing the dedication. Sheās the reason I lost Missy. She doesnāt get to just stand there and pretend sheās sorry, while my parents and I are still grieving.ā
Your eyes had blurred with tears, and your chest was tight. You should never have come.Ā
But then, āleave āer alone, Jake.ā Bobby stood up, facing the other man.Ā
āOh, you coming to her rescue is rich, Baby on Board. Wasnāt it your dick she was sucking when my kid sister went missing?ā
The room went dead silent.
Bob took a breath. Then two. āDonāt you dare talk about her like that. Sheās here, whether you like it or not. And she deserves another chance, just as much as anybody.ā
āNo, you know what? Youāre right. This was a mistake. I should never have come,ā you spoke up, rising from your chair.
But Bobby grabbed your arm. āNo. Donāt let him drive you away.ā His eyes were pleading.
You pulled away from his grasp, sadly shaking your head.Ā
āIām sorry,ā you whispered. Then you turned to Jake. āI wish I could bring your sister back. But I canāt. You need to know that I cared about her. And I should have been more thorough when I did bed check that night. I regret it every day, and Iāve lived with that guilt for the last six years. But my guilt is nothing compared to the loss you and your parents have had to endure. And for that, Iām so fucking sorry. Iāll leave, if thatās what youād prefer. I never should have come in the first place.ā
With that, you ducked your head, pushing your chair out of the way as you scrambled toward the exit. You could hear Bob calling your name, but you ignored him, your legs carrying you quickly toward the door. Your vision had tunneled, and your chest was heavy. You had to get out of that building. You felt like you were suffocating. Like someone had pulled a plastic bag over your face.
You threw your arms out in front of you and shoved the door open, letting out a great heaving sob as you stumbled down the front steps. You made it a few feet from the stairs before you leaned forward, hands braced on your knees as you fell apart.
āOh, God!ā You cried. You heard footsteps quickly approaching. It made you whirl around. āJust leave me the fuck alone!ā Came your wail.
āNo! I donāt care what he says, you deserve to be here!āĀ
It was Bob, you realized.Ā
āWhat do you want me to do, then?! He doesnāt want me here, Bob! And I never shouldāve come. So justā¦just pull the truck around and Iāll get my luggage and get the fuck out of here.ā
āNo.ā
āEither you take me back to the station, or Iāll get someone else to do it!ā
āNo other buses are running until tomorrow morning, so you canāt leave anyway! Youāre stuck here for the night.ā
āGoddammit!ā You yelled. āI just want to leave!ā
He grabbed you by the shoulders. āYouāre not listening to me! I canāt handle watching you walk away from me again. I lost you once, and Iāll be damned if I let Jake Seresin be the reason I lose you again!ā
And then, silence.
āOh.āĀ
He released your shoulders suddenly, his face stricken. āI-Iām sorry. Iām coming on way too strong. This is probably super overwhelming for you and Iām just making it worse.ā
āNo. No, youā¦you arenāt.ā A pause. And then, āI donāt want to walk away from you again, either.ā
āIf you want to leave, then Iāll take you to the station tomorrow morning. But I just want you to try and stay. I know Jake doesnāt want you here, but Iām sure Pete can convince him to at least give you a chance.ā
āIām not so sure about that.ā
However, back inside the mess hall, a discussion was happening. āIām sorry, Jake. I know we should have told you we invited her back. I take full responsibility for that oversight. But your parentsā¦they knew she was coming. We checked with them beforehand. Your mom is of the belief that we should give her another chance.ā
āWhat?ā Jake asked, incredulous.Ā
āYeah. So, I know itās hard for you, but if your mom is willing to forgive, then Iām going to respect that, and give this girl a chance. You know sheās lived with this guilt for so long. I think thatās punishment enough.ā
The blonde sighed, shaking his head. āI donāt like it. If it was up to me, sheād be on the next Greyhound outta here. But if my mom wants her hereā¦ā He looked out the window, eyeing you and Bob as you spoke to each other. āIt boggles my damn mind, but Iāll respect my momās wishes. That doesnāt mean I forgive her, though. I donāt think I ever will. But you go ahead and keep her on staff. Something tells me it aināt gonna end well, but what do I know?ā
And with that, Jake stalked off in a huff.Ā
He swung the screen door open, and your head shot up, your eyes widening as you saw him coming down the steps. Bobby took a protective step toward you.Ā
āYou can stay,ā Jake said as he walked past. āBut only because my mom is the one who wanted you here.ā Then he leaned in close. Well, as close as Bob would allow him to get. āBut just know this. If you fuck up in any way, shape, or form, Iāll ship you back home myself. We clear?ā
āY-yes,ā you responded with a curt nod.Ā
āGood.āĀ
And with that, Jake Seresin walked away.
You let out an unsteady breath, your shoulders slumping. Bobby looked at you, his gaze questioning. āWhat are you gonna do?ā
You shook your head. āIā¦I donātā¦ā
āYou donāt need to decide now. Just sleep on it. Make your decision with a fresh mind, alright?ā
āYeah,ā came your whispered reply. āYeah, thatāsāthatās what Iāll do.ā
He took his baseball cap off, running his fingers through his hair. āIām sorry. I know this is a lot for you. Do ya wanna just turn in early? Iām sure theyād understand if you skipped orientation.ā
You considered his words, and finally, you shook your head. āNo. Iāll, uh, Iāll try to go, and see how I do. But I think Iām going to just go and lay down for a while until then.ā
āWant me to walk you back?ā
āIād like that.ā
With a soft smile and a nod, Bobby began to guide you back toward the cabins. Your hands were shaking, and your head was spinning. It felt like someone had shoved their hands into your chest and taken hold of your lungs, squeezing them with all their might.Ā
It was a painfully uncomfortable feeling, and you hoped that it would pass soon. But as long as you were here, in this place that held so many memories, it would probably remain a permanent fixture in your body. The only thing that soothed it was Bobbyās presence.
Even after all these years, and after the sour note youād left him on, being near him still felt so comforting and peaceful. It was an odd, but welcome, sensation. You hadnāt expected it to be this way. When you thought of seeing him again, you imagined it would be painfully awkward, or that maybe he would refuse to speak to you.Ā
But this was Robert Floyd you were talking about. He didnāt hold grudges. And if he did, then heād been deeply hurt beyond repair. It was a relief to know that things were not beyond mending between you. At the moment, you were too overwhelmed and emotional to even consider what it might mean for you in the future. You were just grateful that he was near you again.
So much had changed. When youād left him, heād been more gangly. Twenty-two years old. Large wireframes perched atop his nose. All round cheeks and softer features. Now, he seemed a little taller. Or maybe, his slight bulk made him appear so. Gone were those gangly limbs, replaced with muscle that had been defined by physical labor.Ā
His hands, though. His hands had stayed the same. Theyād always been big, but heād grown into them. They suited him now. Strong and steady. Farmerās hands.Ā
āYou want me to come get you when itās time for orientation?ā The low cadence of his voice jarred you from your daydream.
āIf you would? I forgot to pack my battery alarm clock, so have no way of keeping time.ā
He nodded. āSure. I can get ya one of those clocks. I actually have two, you can have one of mine.ā
āYou sure?ā
āYep, I donāt need two anyway. Iāll bring it to you later tonight.ā
You shot him a grateful smile. āThanks. I really appreciate it.ā
Together, you stopped just outside your cabin, lingering at the foot of the stairs. Bobās face was gentle, his eyes kind. āFor what itās worth, Iām glad youāre here. I know itās a for you lot to be back here. And Jake didnāt help anythinā by reacting the way he did. But if no one else is happy to see you, I want you to know that I am. Iāll respect whatever decision you make, but I really do hope youāll stay.ā
You considered his words, mulling them over in your mind. He didnāt expect you to decide at that very moment, and you knew your brain was too overworked to make that decision then as it was. So, the best you could do was nod your head. āIāll see you in a bit, Bobby.ā
He hummed, mouth quirking into a smile. āSee you in a bit, Kit.ā
You watched him walk away, his footsteps sure, his stance confident. He had a swagger to him that he didnāt have six years ago. It suited him well.Ā
With a soft sigh, you finally turned and made your way into the cabin. As soon as the screen slammed behind you, you surged forward, collapsing into your bed, which was right near the door. Immediately, you buried your face in the pillow, and everything youād been keeping inside came spilling out of you in bitter waves.
What had you gotten yourself into?
to be continued...
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taglist (tagging those who showed interest; if you want to be added let me know)
you know that gag where thereās a character whoās falling off a ledge to their death and theyāre all teary and the music swells as their hand slips and then the shot zooms out to show they fell like. two feet. thatās what answering important emails feels like.