It’s been a while since I last posted, as I am writing this, it has been two months. I am not sure if anyone is going to see this post, but I wanted to talk about some things whether or not it gets engagement. I don’t really care for it? But at the same time, I guess I do. Oh well.
I fell out of love for all of this. When I first started this, I thought I was losing my mind, perhaps had a mental illness, and was hearing things, and it turned out my intuition was coming into fruition. I had a lot of fun helping others and didn’t even know intuition was a thing but eventually realized roughly a year into it. I remember just following what others did with the spirit guides but had no idea what it was, but then I wrote it according to what felt like me. But that fun slowly died down when my posts would be ghosted. Tumblr had said it was a tag issue and I was not shadowbanned, but then all of my posts, even my SFW ones, would get flagged as mature after I emailed them. Hmm… I slowly started to become burned out, like badly, but another part of me kept going because I really fricken loved helping others, in a way, it helped me out too. It was a beautiful hobby of mine, and I am so damn glad I enjoyed it for the time being and tried within those times. But now? I hate it. Ah… it is the truth, to be frank.. 2 months ago was my limit, it just felt like… I was helping people but was getting nothing out of it. Does that make sense?
I know that it is extremely vulnerable to give your feedback to a stranger on the internet, so I would never really get any, and if I did, it would be rare. It is not to discredit anyone, oh my gosh, no. It is just… feedback really helps you in general, you know? I also think it comes down to a lack of business too. I only had one person, and thank you to them as well, but that was that. I know that patience is very important, but when you are patient for almost 3 years, where is the ending point to it? And I know that you can manifest it, you can use subliminals, affirmations, etc., but unfortunately and weirdly? It never worked for me. I guess, thinking of it in a positive aspect, this was simply not for me, and so it never did? I don’t want to talk so much about this, one, I would feel rather awkward expressing my frustrations with something that absolutely no one is obligated to buy from me (my thoughts), and also, it feels morally wrong? But I wanted to include this in my message regardless.
Posting all of this is so scary for me, I have been upfront about vulnerability for the longest time, so I thought it would be only fair to communicate with everyone about this. I was procrastinating this for the longest time, but I decided to f it, and do it regardless of what happens. In my mind, it has to be constant hate, but I also want to believe it is not. I think this comes down to some nasty comments I have gotten over the years and the constant entitlement, but I want to be proven wrong … in a wishful thinking way.
Anyways, I don’t think I will ever come back to this account, ever post again, or even associate myself with this again? I am not in control of my future or what my future self would like to do, of course, but at the same time, I thought I would leave this up and take my leave… after all... I think this journey has ended.
Hey everyone, just wanted to come here and say that I will miss the next posting time (I post every 2 weeks on Friday at 8:33 pm) because my college semester starts and I want to focus on that. I think I’ll post when I am coming back, and I’ll go back into my regular schedule.
Pile I.
The tower.
You need to understand that your shadow self is not the enemy, nor are you. You have to understand that, regardless of how society sees it, you must learn to see it in a beautiful light. You have heard of stories of people accepting it and they have committed crimes or done things they were not proud of, but those are for them to learn from, learn to control, and have a lesson to follow. This does not mean it will happen for you and it cannot; they are not the same person as you, and they don't have the same morals, boundaries, appreciations, thoughts, etc.—you are your own person, do you understand?
Your shadow self is not this dangerous person to run and hide away from, they are this child who needs help and wants to be protected from others. shadow self, it’s not always going to be something dangerous, yes, some have dangerous ones but that is from UNHEALED trauma, so don’t go around and ridicule yourself for something that will never happen to you and something that could not because you, my dear, are so genuine. You are genuine, so please stop seeking bad addictions to punish yourself for something that is not yours to be ashamed of. Does that make sense? You cannot assume others’ issues are yours, they are not your responsibilities, and these emotions you have been feeling, you have to disregard them. They ARE not yours. You did not commit all of these crimes, let it go—yes, it is easier than doing it, but don’t make nothing become your tower moment and make everything become harder for you than it is already. You need a sense of peace and I hope from this reading that you can.
Channeled song.
I recommend that you listen to the song since it represents your personality completely right now. You have this earnest love for everything around you but when it comes to yourself, it’s nothing and seriously does not matter. I keep hearing this thought that had something like, people won’t understand, people don’t get it, or something very comically critical for a reaction. Each time I would confront the thought or remove it (as in control my thoughts), it would disappear as if it never existed. It's like it seems better to hide things from yourself because you feel embarrassed about it, and if you follow the boundary you made for yourself, or at least try to, you do not feel a sense of clarity and pride for yourself. It’s like you have to be perfect in order to get a ‘well done’ from yourself and that can become toxic.
I cannot give you the exact word I hear because each time it appears as I type this, it keeps disappearing like a fish realizing that what is on the hook isn’t to be consumed, but rather that they are to be consumed. It’s like you simply know if you address those thoughts, something bad will appear but it’s not. You are not going to be consumed by a human or used as a fish in a tank, you will address something that has been pressing on your chest for a long time. You are going to feel as if you got your sins off your chest as if you were confessing in a church or praying to a God/Gods you (example, I am not saying you are if you aren’t so please don’t take it the wrong way) worship and telling them something you felt guilty and disgusted with.
Intuition says, “my dear child, if you learn to appreciate your shadow self and take their feelings into consideration, you will be able to swim faster and not be tempted with bait. My child, if you understand how temptation works and how the human mind functions, then all those worries that have succumbed you for no utter reason will fade with ease. Ease. Not pain. Ease.”
Meaning, learn to let go of all of these anxieties that are not yours, some of you are empaths and can feel people's feelings and have attached them as your own. And the rest of you take their issues to heart because you feel for them. Learn to understand not having it attached does not make you like your abusers (for some) or a bad person/criminal (for the rest). Instead, you are taking care of yourself and having a healthy type of empathy for them. Do you see the difference?
Healthy empathy is when you understand it if you were in their shoes without making it your responsibility and letting it eat you alive, whereas how you are reacting is very unhealthy and something (not only) you don’t deserve, but also this is why you think your shadow self is evil when they are not. I cannot tell you who they are because it is for you to learn and explore. If I were to, then you would see the gist and a generalized example about them—remember this is a collective group reading, it is not based on you only. So you must learn about them in your own time, and remember, it is not the end of the world or something bad to learn about parts of yourself that may not be accepted where you are at, it does not mean you are bad, it simply means you are learning how to appreciate yourself. Take it with ease and be kind to yourself in the way you know how to without shaming yourself for someone's issue or a mistake you made.
Pile II.
It is 12:12 PM and the date is 1/12/26. Three 12s. 1212 usually signifies love is coming your way, yet having three means stagnant, sabotage, and knowing something good is appearing but dodging it because you fear it messing up. Yet, you are healed so why are you here? You already accept your shadow self, so why are you here? What are you looking to find? Perhaps, I should agree with your fears and say, “good job sabotaging! Yeah!!!!”
III of Cups.
I don’t think you realized that you healed yourself completely. I know that it doesn’t seem to be the case because you still deal with issues, however, when someone is healed, it does not mean they do not have issues or are perfect. There is no such thing as being perfect, because your perfect right now could mean something different in the future. Right now, you are absolutely perfect to your past self, but in the future, maybe/maybe not. Do you see what I mean? Everyone is going to have issues regardless, that’s just how life is, and it may always stay that way, or perhaps it will change, it is unknown and that’s okay.
I know that a majority of you use subliminals for mental health, protection, and being perfect to get rid of these ‘imperfections,’ but have you noticed the difference or not? I am not saying the subliminals don’t work, I am saying, actually think about it. You need to stop nitpicking every little detail with yourself and actually take the time to notice the changes that have happened to you before you used it, during it, and now—what has actually changed for you?
I will not tell you what has happened, you have to do it for yourself. You have to make time for yourself, and you need to understand that you are already healed.
Please make sure to congratulate yourself from time to time about it because it is not easy to heal oneself. And yes, you still deserve credit (not some, all) for healing yourself “despite” it being from subliminals. You MADE that choice to use it when you didn’t have to, you could flush it out right now, but decided against it. Do you see how amazing this is, this accomplishment? I am so proud of you, my intuition is, and now… all you have to do is feel proud of yourself (actually feel it, don’t lie to yourself and take your time, you are okay) to get rid of these thoughts that have been bothering you.
I want to give you a warning before this is done and it’s nothing truly bad, it’s more so about yourself. Please understand that the environment around you is not you. What I mean is, a majority of you are surrounded by close-minded and toxic individuals who have not healed themselves or who had the chance to and decided against it. This does not make you like them, but it also does not make you better than them, so you have to leave those ego thoughts away from your mind. Yes, ego protects you and wants to take care of you in the way it knows how to, however, it doesn’t actually understand the state of your mind. So you have to remove these thoughts, or else you will dig yourself in a hole, like using the ‘perfect’ subliminals. I know that it has healed your self-concept but you are using it too much, you have become obsessive with it. Understand that there comes a point when you have to stop using something to ease your mind; it does not mean it will go away, it still stays in your mind. I’ll give you an example to ease your mind and yes, this is based on me.
Before I learned about subliminals, I wanted long nails because my nails were short and barely grew. I listened to the subliminal (I think (it was 3 years ago)) 2-3 times and never touched it again because I didn’t understand what a subliminal was. I noticed nothing for a bit, but I also didn’t put much thought into it. Then I started to realize my nails grew very fast, and throughout the months, they would be long, and I would have to cut them consistently. It was so annoying, and I didn’t remember the reason why until it hit me, and it made me chuckle. I didn’t use it ever again, but the results stayed. My nails will be cut, but after the next day, I will see them become longer than they are supposed to.
Do you see what I mean now? You need to let go of that subliminal, it is messing with your mental health. You have people telling you there is no such thing as perfect while your mind tells you, ‘uh?? Have you met me?? I AM PERFECT!’ And then you have those who say you are perfect (manifestation/reality shifting blogs (nothing against them)) and you can manifest anything that you want, and your mind is in a shambles. You can take whatever you want from this blog, but I will address something based on *your* energy.
You are not perfect but that is okay. It doesn’t mean you are not healed, it simply means there are insecurities lingering in you that you have to heal. That’s it. You can still have some insecurities and be healed, this is normal.
Pile III.
The fool.
Channeled song.
Fire “passion.”
What are your passions? What turns you on? What ignites that inner flame; that creative spark? When you feel devoid of passion, consider what is missing in your life. Open yourself to the truth of what you are passionate about and find a means to express it.
Okay. You are my very VERY short pile, but you have already accepted your shadow self and wanted to see if you could get anything out from this pile to help them *become* more comfortable with you. First, that’s a sweet gesture, but you have to remember, they are you, so are you comfortable with yourself now that you know you accept them, or is there something missing? Do you think you have to fix something within to feel comfortable with yourself, or perhaps you have to express something within and bring out that fire that had been fused?
You need to think about how you are feeling rather than your shadow self. I know that people have given you misinformation that it’s this ‘split’ part of you, an alter ego, a split personality/persona about you, or another version of you that’s actually seeing everything that you are doing. But in reality, it’s the parts that we cannot accept because of how our society shaped us. So, tell yourself, did you really accept yourself… or did you do it to follow a trend because you are lonely, and sometimes that loneliness feels painful?
I have a message from your shadow self (this is you, do not follow misinformation anymore and educate yourself, okay?).
“Hey. I think you have to understand that we are the same person, and this pressure is making me feel sick and nauseous. No matter what we consume, I still feel dizzy and I hate it. Sometimes I feel like puking, but at the same time, it feels like a phantom feeling and I don’t know what to do. I didn’t want to say anything to you, to myself, the part that is out there making society happy, but I am okay to do it now. I need us to start pleasing ourselves, to do better for us, and to show to society/others/close toxic friends that we aren’t going to follow them to seek the latest trend but rather be close with us and want the best for us. I cannot keep following the trends, waste money that was needed for validation, and then have society kick us in the butt because we didn’t heal in their journal style way. Look, I get it, we are traumatized and feel broken, but I also know we are strong and resilient. Shouldn't we give ourselves credit where it is due? If not, we will crumble and become the lowest on a food web.”
What does the ringing in your ear mean (detailed + channeled song)?
Masterlist.
Moodboard | divider
It’s been a while since I added an ‘author’s note,’ but read this if you randomly get them because I don’t want those who have ear issues to believe/assume it could have an intuitive meaning. So, just take care of your mental health first, k? k.
Pile I.
Nothing in the way you assume. What I mean is that your intuition is guiding you to the right path, but because you are focused on spiritual TikTok, you prefer to ignore it for what others are saying. These people DO NOT KNOW YOU or your energy, so how can you ignore what your gut is saying for someone else? Don’t you think you deserve nothing but the best? Don't you think you deserve freedom, peace, and happiness? Understand the path that is trying to pull you in has no interest in hurting you but rather in giving you LESSONS you need to grow as the person you crave!
Those who are on TikTok and preaching spirituality do not know what they are talking about. Yes, some can be legit and know about some things, but remember, spirituality is literally about someone’s energy, and energy is complicated. So let's say I am individually channeling for you, but someone else comes into the session; the energy is going to become scattered, and it would be slightly hard to channel it because someone else is there. What intuition is saying, “if you keep allowing others to tell you your story, you are never going to have a story in the first place. If you let others make you question things and make you doubt your progress because they appear smart in something you desire, then you are never going to grow as a person. Is that something you desire, child?’
Fog “veiled”
You are enmeshed in confusion and uncertainty and are unsure if it will every clear up. This is not the best time to make decisions, particularly major ones. Know that this foggy veil will eventually dissolve.
Before I was going to channel your pile, I had no idea what I was going to channel. Usually I have an idea based on the energy, but I couldn’t figure it out. I didn't even know if you needed tarot (or an oracle card) and was surprised it was an oracle. The reason why I added this was because you doubt yourself too much. You really do. Some of you are very into ‘living in the end,’ and that’s great. I’m proud of you for finding the right manifestation technique… however, before you live in the end, please be considerate of your mental health and mental goals. You have to take care of them before you manifest anything based on your energy.
channeled song
You have this feeling that you know that everything is going to work out for you in the end, and it is, but it can never happen if you don't follow the path that keeps begging you to follow through. I know that you all have wishful thinking and you really f * cking want this path you are all manifesting, and gosh, it’s beautiful, it is, but before you can have it, you need to have some lessons so this desire can never break apart. You need to be understanding of what your intuition wants because your intuition knows more for you, it knows what you need, and it knows there is something you cannot see, like the saying “there is more than meets the eye.”
Masterlist.
Pile II.
Your future spouse/poly/lover is coming your way, but you have to heal something you don't want to because you think you love that part of you. You have gotten to the point where you can either heal all of the stupid generational trauma that was projected onto you, or you can run away from it and hide those parts of you that you find repulsive and morph yourself into what is ‘right.’ And I know your heart says you have run away, but you haven’t. In your own way, you healed parts of you that didn’t have a home, but now… you need to let them come out and stay in the home you made for the parts that were accepted from your abusers—
IX of Swords
You cannot love something that was never broken. You cannot love something that you thought was broken. You cannot love something that doesn't need to be loved.
Your energy is so confusing (aha), but it's done on purpose. You are so divinely (religious, spiritual, or whatever you worship) protected that I cannot channel anything, and tarot isn’t helping. It's like you have something around you 24/7 protecting you from unwanted things. Did you have a guardian who adored you so much or appeared grumpy but wanted the best for you? I am also hearing about a friend you lost contact with because of a partner (cheating? breaking up?), but they were into witchcraft. Whatever the case is, they protected you to protect you from the parts that would eat you alive, but you have been noticing parts of you coming out. And each time they have, instead of shoving them away like you would have in the past, you are letting them come out slowly with tenderness. But each time the ringing in your ear comes, it’s always when you let them come out, and you are thinking it’s a warning because some of the articles you have read or skimmed through have told you it’s a warning but it’s not. It’s literally just telling you, “you are on the right path, keep going. Something beautiful is coming your way.”
I want to keep adding more for you, and I keep craving to give you something to validate what you have been going through. But you have to understand, validation must be given to ourselves. You have to give yourself the validation you have been craving. You cannot expect it from others. They can give you something, but based on your energy, you will move on from it after a few days, sometimes a month if you truly needed it. Validation in general should not be given away to receive another. What I mean is, when you validate yourself, you gain the confidence you need to do better or gain confidence in something you lack. You also learn to believe in yourself alongside having a stronger relationship with who you are as a person. When you seek it from others, it doesn't last long, and that is not healthy. This is something you have to heal because you cannot love this part of you.
Everyone can want validation from something, and this is normal, but it is also important to show yourself that validation that you seek, or else you will spiral and become obsessive over something you may never be able to receive.
It's beautiful that you want to accept every part of yourself, but sometimes, when you want to grow, you have to let go of parts of yourself in order too. Without letting go of things, you will never be able to grow. Think about something of your past where you struggled to grow, and think about the time you let go of something—what was the aftermath of them both? You have to understand despite what the aftermath was, you still did it and became someone new the next day.
Growth comes in all different shapes and forms, and sometimes it comes from learning not to accept a part of you that doesn’t need to be accepted. This does not make you a bad person if you stop accepting them… it simply means you know there is more potential in yourself, and with the realization of this pile, you are able to heal the last thing you need before meeting them and having that beautiful thing come your way.
channeled song
Masterlist.
Pile III.
Before I was going to channel your song, all of a sudden my room and the spot I was sitting on became cold. It’s not possible for it to happen, and my room is always humid. It’s like you simply know the reason behind it but prefer to hide behind not knowing and become obsessive over it because it’s better that way.
A lot of you have dealt with instances where no one believed you or trusted your gut, so in a way, to take back control of that (or those painful memories), you do the same with yourself. You also assume this is the best way to show yourself love because at least you are self-aware with it, but is it truly self-love, or is it a fear of the past eating you alive? Is it a way to control the pain, or is it something you think you deserve? I want you to think about those questions throughout your month and see where it takes you.
Channeled song.
You need to understand this ringing in your ear is not tinnitus, so please stop assuming the worst for yourself and becoming self-conscious about something that is a warning. A warning for your mental health. It is letting you know that you are doing too much and you need to take a step back before things get worse for you.
Some of you are into Wiccan witchcraft, herbalism witchcraft (?), and sorcery or alchemy using herbs and spells. And you assume it has something to do with a lack of protection when you do your spells or sigils (?), but it’s not. You are already protected, and if you haven’t practiced or done spells/sigils with it, it doesn’t matter since your intention counts.
I want to point out something important and something everyone here reading this pile has to understand. If you do not take care of your mental health and treat yourself with kindness—if you do not treat yourself with acceptance, understanding, and appreciation—you will fall down into a rabbit hole you will not be able to climb out of, and nothing will help you either. This is the warning that has been ringing in your ear and also pissing you off. You have to understand your spirit guide/intuition/ancestors/whatever you feel a connection to is seriously trying to warn you and bring you back to the world and make sure you have a connection with yourself.
I am at this point where I want to cut your reading and call it a day because I gave you the gist of what you need to know, however, I keep hearing, “alice, it is time to go down the rabbit hole, it’s time. Alice! This way, it is time!” What this is saying is.. you have to understand no matter the place you go, or no matter what you do, you will enter a rabbit hole where it is either a place of peace or a place of doom. You have to understand it is time to find solace within yourself and understand how intuitive you are, not because you have practiced spirituality or read about it, but more so because you are very perceptive and deserve to appreciate that because if you don’t, you will not be able to climb back out of the hole you were dropped in instead of chasing the White Rabbit and seeing where the roads would have taken you.
What does the ringing in your ear mean (detailed + channeled song)?
Masterlist.
Moodboard | divider
It’s been a while since I added an ‘author’s note,’ but read this if you randomly get them because I don’t want those who have ear issues to believe/assume it could have an intuitive meaning. So, just take care of your mental health first, k? k.
Pile I.
Nothing in the way you assume. What I mean is that your intuition is guiding you to the right path, but because you are focused on spiritual TikTok, you prefer to ignore it for what others are saying. These people DO NOT KNOW YOU or your energy, so how can you ignore what your gut is saying for someone else? Don’t you think you deserve nothing but the best? Don't you think you deserve freedom, peace, and happiness? Understand the path that is trying to pull you in has no interest in hurting you but rather in giving you LESSONS you need to grow as the person you crave!
Those who are on TikTok and preaching spirituality do not know what they are talking about. Yes, some can be legit and know about some things, but remember, spirituality is literally about someone’s energy, and energy is complicated. So let's say I am individually channeling for you, but someone else comes into the session; the energy is going to become scattered, and it would be slightly hard to channel it because someone else is there. What intuition is saying, “if you keep allowing others to tell you your story, you are never going to have a story in the first place. If you let others make you question things and make you doubt your progress because they appear smart in something you desire, then you are never going to grow as a person. Is that something you desire, child?’
Fog “veiled”
You are enmeshed in confusion and uncertainty and are unsure if it will every clear up. This is not the best time to make decisions, particularly major ones. Know that this foggy veil will eventually dissolve.
Before I was going to channel your pile, I had no idea what I was going to channel. Usually I have an idea based on the energy, but I couldn’t figure it out. I didn't even know if you needed tarot (or an oracle card) and was surprised it was an oracle. The reason why I added this was because you doubt yourself too much. You really do. Some of you are very into ‘living in the end,’ and that’s great. I’m proud of you for finding the right manifestation technique… however, before you live in the end, please be considerate of your mental health and mental goals. You have to take care of them before you manifest anything based on your energy.
channeled song
You have this feeling that you know that everything is going to work out for you in the end, and it is, but it can never happen if you don't follow the path that keeps begging you to follow through. I know that you all have wishful thinking and you really f * cking want this path you are all manifesting, and gosh, it’s beautiful, it is, but before you can have it, you need to have some lessons so this desire can never break apart. You need to be understanding of what your intuition wants because your intuition knows more for you, it knows what you need, and it knows there is something you cannot see, like the saying “there is more than meets the eye.”
Masterlist.
Pile II.
Your future spouse/poly/lover is coming your way, but you have to heal something you don't want to because you think you love that part of you. You have gotten to the point where you can either heal all of the stupid generational trauma that was projected onto you, or you can run away from it and hide those parts of you that you find repulsive and morph yourself into what is ‘right.’ And I know your heart says you have run away, but you haven’t. In your own way, you healed parts of you that didn’t have a home, but now… you need to let them come out and stay in the home you made for the parts that were accepted from your abusers—
IX of Swords
You cannot love something that was never broken. You cannot love something that you thought was broken. You cannot love something that doesn't need to be loved.
Your energy is so confusing (aha), but it's done on purpose. You are so divinely (religious, spiritual, or whatever you worship) protected that I cannot channel anything, and tarot isn’t helping. It's like you have something around you 24/7 protecting you from unwanted things. Did you have a guardian who adored you so much or appeared grumpy but wanted the best for you? I am also hearing about a friend you lost contact with because of a partner (cheating? breaking up?), but they were into witchcraft. Whatever the case is, they protected you to protect you from the parts that would eat you alive, but you have been noticing parts of you coming out. And each time they have, instead of shoving them away like you would have in the past, you are letting them come out slowly with tenderness. But each time the ringing in your ear comes, it’s always when you let them come out, and you are thinking it’s a warning because some of the articles you have read or skimmed through have told you it’s a warning but it’s not. It’s literally just telling you, “you are on the right path, keep going. Something beautiful is coming your way.”
I want to keep adding more for you, and I keep craving to give you something to validate what you have been going through. But you have to understand, validation must be given to ourselves. You have to give yourself the validation you have been craving. You cannot expect it from others. They can give you something, but based on your energy, you will move on from it after a few days, sometimes a month if you truly needed it. Validation in general should not be given away to receive another. What I mean is, when you validate yourself, you gain the confidence you need to do better or gain confidence in something you lack. You also learn to believe in yourself alongside having a stronger relationship with who you are as a person. When you seek it from others, it doesn't last long, and that is not healthy. This is something you have to heal because you cannot love this part of you.
Everyone can want validation from something, and this is normal, but it is also important to show yourself that validation that you seek, or else you will spiral and become obsessive over something you may never be able to receive.
It's beautiful that you want to accept every part of yourself, but sometimes, when you want to grow, you have to let go of parts of yourself in order too. Without letting go of things, you will never be able to grow. Think about something of your past where you struggled to grow, and think about the time you let go of something—what was the aftermath of them both? You have to understand despite what the aftermath was, you still did it and became someone new the next day.
Growth comes in all different shapes and forms, and sometimes it comes from learning not to accept a part of you that doesn’t need to be accepted. This does not make you a bad person if you stop accepting them… it simply means you know there is more potential in yourself, and with the realization of this pile, you are able to heal the last thing you need before meeting them and having that beautiful thing come your way.
channeled song
Masterlist.
Pile III.
Before I was going to channel your song, all of a sudden my room and the spot I was sitting on became cold. It’s not possible for it to happen, and my room is always humid. It’s like you simply know the reason behind it but prefer to hide behind not knowing and become obsessive over it because it’s better that way.
A lot of you have dealt with instances where no one believed you or trusted your gut, so in a way, to take back control of that (or those painful memories), you do the same with yourself. You also assume this is the best way to show yourself love because at least you are self-aware with it, but is it truly self-love, or is it a fear of the past eating you alive? Is it a way to control the pain, or is it something you think you deserve? I want you to think about those questions throughout your month and see where it takes you.
Channeled song.
You need to understand this ringing in your ear is not tinnitus, so please stop assuming the worst for yourself and becoming self-conscious about something that is a warning. A warning for your mental health. It is letting you know that you are doing too much and you need to take a step back before things get worse for you.
Some of you are into Wiccan witchcraft, herbalism witchcraft (?), and sorcery or alchemy using herbs and spells. And you assume it has something to do with a lack of protection when you do your spells or sigils (?), but it’s not. You are already protected, and if you haven’t practiced or done spells/sigils with it, it doesn’t matter since your intention counts.
I want to point out something important and something everyone here reading this pile has to understand. If you do not take care of your mental health and treat yourself with kindness—if you do not treat yourself with acceptance, understanding, and appreciation—you will fall down into a rabbit hole you will not be able to climb out of, and nothing will help you either. This is the warning that has been ringing in your ear and also pissing you off. You have to understand your spirit guide/intuition/ancestors/whatever you feel a connection to is seriously trying to warn you and bring you back to the world and make sure you have a connection with yourself.
I am at this point where I want to cut your reading and call it a day because I gave you the gist of what you need to know, however, I keep hearing, “alice, it is time to go down the rabbit hole, it’s time. Alice! This way, it is time!” What this is saying is.. you have to understand no matter the place you go, or no matter what you do, you will enter a rabbit hole where it is either a place of peace or a place of doom. You have to understand it is time to find solace within yourself and understand how intuitive you are, not because you have practiced spirituality or read about it, but more so because you are very perceptive and deserve to appreciate that because if you don’t, you will not be able to climb back out of the hole you were dropped in instead of chasing the White Rabbit and seeing where the roads would have taken you.
What does the ringing in your ear mean (detailed + channeled song)?
Masterlist.
Moodboard | divider
It’s been a while since I added an ‘author’s note,’ but read this if you randomly get them because I don’t want those who have ear issues to believe/assume it could have an intuitive meaning. So, just take care of your mental health first, k? k.
Pile I.
Nothing in the way you assume. What I mean is that your intuition is guiding you to the right path, but because you are focused on spiritual TikTok, you prefer to ignore it for what others are saying. These people DO NOT KNOW YOU or your energy, so how can you ignore what your gut is saying for someone else? Don’t you think you deserve nothing but the best? Don't you think you deserve freedom, peace, and happiness? Understand the path that is trying to pull you in has no interest in hurting you but rather in giving you LESSONS you need to grow as the person you crave!
Those who are on TikTok and preaching spirituality do not know what they are talking about. Yes, some can be legit and know about some things, but remember, spirituality is literally about someone’s energy, and energy is complicated. So let's say I am individually channeling for you, but someone else comes into the session; the energy is going to become scattered, and it would be slightly hard to channel it because someone else is there. What intuition is saying, “if you keep allowing others to tell you your story, you are never going to have a story in the first place. If you let others make you question things and make you doubt your progress because they appear smart in something you desire, then you are never going to grow as a person. Is that something you desire, child?’
Fog “veiled”
You are enmeshed in confusion and uncertainty and are unsure if it will every clear up. This is not the best time to make decisions, particularly major ones. Know that this foggy veil will eventually dissolve.
Before I was going to channel your pile, I had no idea what I was going to channel. Usually I have an idea based on the energy, but I couldn’t figure it out. I didn't even know if you needed tarot (or an oracle card) and was surprised it was an oracle. The reason why I added this was because you doubt yourself too much. You really do. Some of you are very into ‘living in the end,’ and that’s great. I’m proud of you for finding the right manifestation technique… however, before you live in the end, please be considerate of your mental health and mental goals. You have to take care of them before you manifest anything based on your energy.
channeled song
You have this feeling that you know that everything is going to work out for you in the end, and it is, but it can never happen if you don't follow the path that keeps begging you to follow through. I know that you all have wishful thinking and you really f * cking want this path you are all manifesting, and gosh, it’s beautiful, it is, but before you can have it, you need to have some lessons so this desire can never break apart. You need to be understanding of what your intuition wants because your intuition knows more for you, it knows what you need, and it knows there is something you cannot see, like the saying “there is more than meets the eye.”
Masterlist.
Pile II.
Your future spouse/poly/lover is coming your way, but you have to heal something you don't want to because you think you love that part of you. You have gotten to the point where you can either heal all of the stupid generational trauma that was projected onto you, or you can run away from it and hide those parts of you that you find repulsive and morph yourself into what is ‘right.’ And I know your heart says you have run away, but you haven’t. In your own way, you healed parts of you that didn’t have a home, but now… you need to let them come out and stay in the home you made for the parts that were accepted from your abusers—
IX of Swords
You cannot love something that was never broken. You cannot love something that you thought was broken. You cannot love something that doesn't need to be loved.
Your energy is so confusing (aha), but it's done on purpose. You are so divinely (religious, spiritual, or whatever you worship) protected that I cannot channel anything, and tarot isn’t helping. It's like you have something around you 24/7 protecting you from unwanted things. Did you have a guardian who adored you so much or appeared grumpy but wanted the best for you? I am also hearing about a friend you lost contact with because of a partner (cheating? breaking up?), but they were into witchcraft. Whatever the case is, they protected you to protect you from the parts that would eat you alive, but you have been noticing parts of you coming out. And each time they have, instead of shoving them away like you would have in the past, you are letting them come out slowly with tenderness. But each time the ringing in your ear comes, it’s always when you let them come out, and you are thinking it’s a warning because some of the articles you have read or skimmed through have told you it’s a warning but it’s not. It’s literally just telling you, “you are on the right path, keep going. Something beautiful is coming your way.”
I want to keep adding more for you, and I keep craving to give you something to validate what you have been going through. But you have to understand, validation must be given to ourselves. You have to give yourself the validation you have been craving. You cannot expect it from others. They can give you something, but based on your energy, you will move on from it after a few days, sometimes a month if you truly needed it. Validation in general should not be given away to receive another. What I mean is, when you validate yourself, you gain the confidence you need to do better or gain confidence in something you lack. You also learn to believe in yourself alongside having a stronger relationship with who you are as a person. When you seek it from others, it doesn't last long, and that is not healthy. This is something you have to heal because you cannot love this part of you.
Everyone can want validation from something, and this is normal, but it is also important to show yourself that validation that you seek, or else you will spiral and become obsessive over something you may never be able to receive.
It's beautiful that you want to accept every part of yourself, but sometimes, when you want to grow, you have to let go of parts of yourself in order too. Without letting go of things, you will never be able to grow. Think about something of your past where you struggled to grow, and think about the time you let go of something—what was the aftermath of them both? You have to understand despite what the aftermath was, you still did it and became someone new the next day.
Growth comes in all different shapes and forms, and sometimes it comes from learning not to accept a part of you that doesn’t need to be accepted. This does not make you a bad person if you stop accepting them… it simply means you know there is more potential in yourself, and with the realization of this pile, you are able to heal the last thing you need before meeting them and having that beautiful thing come your way.
channeled song
Masterlist.
Pile III.
Before I was going to channel your song, all of a sudden my room and the spot I was sitting on became cold. It’s not possible for it to happen, and my room is always humid. It’s like you simply know the reason behind it but prefer to hide behind not knowing and become obsessive over it because it’s better that way.
A lot of you have dealt with instances where no one believed you or trusted your gut, so in a way, to take back control of that (or those painful memories), you do the same with yourself. You also assume this is the best way to show yourself love because at least you are self-aware with it, but is it truly self-love, or is it a fear of the past eating you alive? Is it a way to control the pain, or is it something you think you deserve? I want you to think about those questions throughout your month and see where it takes you.
Channeled song.
You need to understand this ringing in your ear is not tinnitus, so please stop assuming the worst for yourself and becoming self-conscious about something that is a warning. A warning for your mental health. It is letting you know that you are doing too much and you need to take a step back before things get worse for you.
Some of you are into Wiccan witchcraft, herbalism witchcraft (?), and sorcery or alchemy using herbs and spells. And you assume it has something to do with a lack of protection when you do your spells or sigils (?), but it’s not. You are already protected, and if you haven’t practiced or done spells/sigils with it, it doesn’t matter since your intention counts.
I want to point out something important and something everyone here reading this pile has to understand. If you do not take care of your mental health and treat yourself with kindness—if you do not treat yourself with acceptance, understanding, and appreciation—you will fall down into a rabbit hole you will not be able to climb out of, and nothing will help you either. This is the warning that has been ringing in your ear and also pissing you off. You have to understand your spirit guide/intuition/ancestors/whatever you feel a connection to is seriously trying to warn you and bring you back to the world and make sure you have a connection with yourself.
I am at this point where I want to cut your reading and call it a day because I gave you the gist of what you need to know, however, I keep hearing, “alice, it is time to go down the rabbit hole, it’s time. Alice! This way, it is time!” What this is saying is.. you have to understand no matter the place you go, or no matter what you do, you will enter a rabbit hole where it is either a place of peace or a place of doom. You have to understand it is time to find solace within yourself and understand how intuitive you are, not because you have practiced spirituality or read about it, but more so because you are very perceptive and deserve to appreciate that because if you don’t, you will not be able to climb back out of the hole you were dropped in instead of chasing the White Rabbit and seeing where the roads would have taken you.
When you were younger, you always thought that those who had children were either very stupid or did not love themselves and wanted to seek validation from their spouse. Sometimes we speak to others about something, and irony can come into place—now you know what you were made for because you have been thinking about it for quite some time. But the past and how you assumed others felt about kids have made you feel ashamed. You must remember the past is the past, and what you knew was who you were and what you knew, right? So there's no need to feel any shame, but you're meant to have adopted children that are disabled or mentally challenged. You're here on this earth to give them a reason to live, a reason to fall in love with themselves, and for you to fall in love with yourself because you have a connection with something you didn't think would be right for you, whether you decide to have a spouse or not. This is going to heal every aspect of your heart that you did not believe was truly possible and something that you didn't think you deserved.
With the eight of cups, tarot is telling you that you have thought about this ever since you said those words, you couldn’t accept what you really wanted because you were living in a toxic environment and you had very close-minded family members. It made you want to fit in with their ideologies, and so instead of admitting to yourself what you wanted, you buried it away until it got to the point where every time you tried to walk into the past and pluck out the things you wanted—a gust of wind would blow you away, and you fell into the rabbit hole of following their ideals.
Tarot is telling you that you are going to discover your inner child and have a connection with them when you finally tell them what you are planning to do. You're going to heal your soul. Your soul has been hurting for way longer than it should have. You haven't been taking care of it, and the idea of following the crowd is more appealing to you because it's the safest choice. You are scared of everything else, but if you were just to take a leap of faith with yourself and try something new that you adore from your past, you're going to realize the small cracks that you have been rebuilding with your shameful glue are going to crumble, and you're going to see someone new pop up. Tarot is saying that you're going to realize that you never truly abandoned yourself; you kind of hid that part of yourself to protect who you were, but you no longer need to do that because you are in a safe place, and it is your time to finally let go and realize what you were made for. to realize your purpose and to realize that this is not based on your fears. You already knew what you were going to do in this life but decided against it because of fear. Do not allow your fear to win because in these circumstances it is not your friend, and it's not warning you about anything. Take the leap of faith and see where it takes you.
Ace of cups is your confirmation.
Masterlist.
Pile II.
Trigger warnings
Please click on the link to see them, I don’t want to risk another content label warning for no reason.
Judgment reversed, three of swords reversed, six of wands reversed, and nine of wands reversed.
You are such a brave fighter. What you have been through and to be able to accomplish that is such a beautiful thing. I hope you know how proud I am of you and that you feel the same about yourself instead of being so oblivious.
You don't have a specific purpose as to what you were made for and why you were put on this earth because you are supposed to make that for yourself. You don't have a specific guide for yourself because you do not believe in spirit guides, you don't believe in a gut feeling, or that tarot readers are real, but at times you come to read it, and it always helps you out. The idea of believing it grosses you out. Understand that you should have no shame about it; you are allowed to believe what you desire, but tarot is saying with reversed judgment and the three of swords reversed that you need to feel okay with what you believe in and what you don’t. If you learn to appreciate that it's okay not to believe in a specific thing, even though you follow through with it, you're going to have a beautiful connection with yourself and understand you are made to be okay for you.
Society now truly believes that we have a purpose, and the purpose is a specific job or a specific thing. Things are generalized in this reading because everyone who is reading this is a completely different person, with different energy and different everything. So I cannot give you a full reading, but I do want to give you words of encouragement and for you to show appreciation towards yourself.
You need to stop fighting yourself about the things that you do. As mentioned before, a lot of you guys don't believe in tarot reading, energy reading, or even reiki, but you listen to it, and it does something for you; you are not obligated to believe in something just because you use it. You're not obligated to believe in something because it helps you. You're allowed to say that you don't believe in it, that it's rubbish, but it helps you. Like, it's totally fine.
From these thoughts… have you realized that these are the experiences of what happened to you in your past? For some of you guys, you have been scammed by tarot readers. Some of you have been used and taken advantage of when you were vulnerable for them. And your ideology of them is very rubbish. That's okay. Do not feel ashamed, please. Some of you had someone sexually assault you during a reiki session, and now you feel grossed out about it, but you still use it because you have a connection to it. Please do not shame yourself for it! Some of you had a guy friend who made lies about your future, and you believed him—there are so many situations that have happened for those reading this that I cannot even channel it because it would be too much information, and that is not something that has to be channeled for others to see. meaning that for those that are not included, your energy is very private, and I have no desire to disrespect your energy… But even my words seem like lies sometimes because you don't believe them. That's okay. Don't believe me. It's okay. Seriously, it's okay. I'm not offended. I understand. I understand your energy. I'm not offended. So don't feel shame, okay?
Judgment reversed is everything your thoughts are feeling right now. But you must understand that it's okay. I know that I have said that it's okay for everything in this reading, and it truly is. You feel a lot of guilt that you are disrespecting other people even though they're helping you, you're not disrespecting anyone. Disrespecting someone is deliberately or even one time interacting and saying something negative towards them. For example, let's say that what I'm saying to you is helping tremendously, but something I say triggers you, and you go into my DM, and you're like, “Hey, you're this, you're that, you're writing sucks, you should die, you should do this, you should do that. I don't want to support you anymore because you read me like a book, and you're so harsh.” That is being disrespectful. But are you doing this? No, you're not. You're seriously okay.
In my readings, sometimes, I will call out people who are going to throw me hate because first, I don't deserve that, and second, it's not worth it, and they should know that, right? So am I calling you out, saying as a warning that ‘Hey, you should not do this, you should not send me hate. It’s not worth it.’ No, I'm reassuring you because you deserve it, and don't feel anxiety because I'm not telling you that. And don't feel like you're disrespecting me because you're not.
You guys remind me of Princess Penelope from Wreck-It Ralph. You guys have a lot of fire, but you will always hide it with a mask of silliness and childlike actions. These are okay. There's nothing wrong with it. If the person knows that you're being silly and sassy, it's okay. But if it's just someone that you don't know, then that's not okay unless they can figure it out or you tell them. That would be disrespectful if you were to keep going at it and the person did not know.
Do you see what I'm saying? You're not being disrespectful. What you were made for is to learn to love yourself. And that is such a beautiful thing. You don't have a purpose other than to love yourself. And when you learn to love yourself, something new and something special is going to come your way. So it's okay to feel this way, okay?
You have four reversed cards. You really need to take the time in your day to really ground yourself and tell yourself that you were made to love yourself and that it's okay not to know anything about your future and that it's okay not to believe in things that are helping you. You're not obligated to, and you never will be, and in the future if you desire to… believe in it. Believe in it. But only believe in it because you want to, not because others believe in it. Believe in the things that you want to believe in. And only then will you be able to heal yourself completely and take control of the things that you thought were never possible because you thought you didn't deserved it.
Masterlist.
Pile III.
Five of pentacles reversed, (face up + at the end of the deck, chains), and ace of swords.
You already know what you're made for, and you're pursuing that. And your inner child is so grateful and so happy that you're able to do what you've always wanted to do. But this reading is not positive and not something to uplift you. It is the warning that you need to know. And if you don't know about it, things will become rocky for you in the future. Especially with chains.
I'll keep the reading straight to the point because a lot of you suffer with ADD or ADHD, and lately your attention span has worsened from the anxiety that you fail to take care of. If you do not take care of your anxiety, that is going to project onto the people that you have met in your university, your high school, or your workspace, and it's not like the reading where people have said to you that if you don't take care of your anxiety, things are going to become rocky for you and you're going to lose that thing that you worked so hard for. I wish it was that instead because it would be much easier to say to you, but rather, if you don't take care of your fears and your emotions, they're going to make you feel suffocated, and it's going to project that fear and anger to those people that you have worked so hard to make a friendship with or have asked for forgiveness and the relationship has thrived.
I cannot specifically say what is going to happen. Because if I were to say it, not only would it trigger you, but it would also make it too real in a way that you could not comprehend what is going to happen. All I can tell you is that you must calm down and realize what you're doing before it happens. You're not going to do anything that is illegal like some of you have done in your past, but you are going to do something that you can never take back, and that is going to scar you in your future. Some of you are thinking about asking a tarot reader through a game or through a paid service, don't. It's going to trigger you, and you're going to spiral out of control. The reason why tarot will not tell me what it is is because some of you are very intuitive and sometimes you can just tell, while the rest of you should not know because it's something dark that has happened to you in your past. Those emotions are resurfacing, and if you were not to take care of them, not only would you lose everything that you have worked hard for, but you would also be the opposite of what you were made for.
I know that in your past, you always questioned what you were made for and what the point was of helping others if they kept hurting you. And ironically, now it's something that you strive forward to, and you want to help other people. You care so much about other people, but the lack of care for yourself has caused you to be a sadistic asshole. And because I want to keep this short, for you to fully understand this, ask yourself, were you made to be a toy for other people to help them with their emotions? Or were you made to learn to take care of your own emotions, put yourself first, and learn to help other people in the best way you know how without disrespecting yourself and making it seem like dramatic irony?
When you look at yourself in the mirror and see your reflection, what do you think about yourself? Are you always nitpicking every single small detail about yourself, thinking that if you were to nitpick those, you'd be able to change instantly because you believe you're an instant manifester? Surely you must understand that you still have to affirm what you desire.
If you keep nitpicking everything about yourself, you're being contradictive towards yourself with your affirmations because your subconscious mind cannot understand what you see, yet you affirm to yourself that “my face has too much acne, there are too many blemishes, and there are too many acne scars.” And then the next day you tell yourself that “I have such clear skin, there are no blemishes, I am healed from all my acne scars.” How can your subconscious mind give you what you desire if you're so contradictory towards it? How can you expect good things from all these desires that you want if you're telling yourself the next day that they're not going to happen? And then the next day you're going to say it's going to happen. It's not going to work.
Who you were in the past, they must stay there. You must allow yourself to let yourself go. Who you were in the past—that is who you were in the past. They are not you. Who you are now includes all the lessons that you have learned. Focus on your lessons and learn from them. Grow from them. Look in your past and say, “okay, well, wait a minute. I did not do so well. But now in the present moment, I can do better for them, and I can do better for me as well as my future self.”
Who you are in the present moment and your future self are completely different from your past. You just have to stop allowing yourself to judge yourself for what you did in your past. Your past isn't as bad as you think. There is nothing that you have done wrong that has hurt anyone except yourself. You are not worthy of hurting yourself. How can you expect your desires if you keep hurting yourself? What are you gaining from that? Truly, WHAT. ARE. YOU. GAINING. FROM. THAT?
Imagine you're talking to someone. You do not know them at all. And you sit next to them and ask them if you can borrow the seat for your friend. They say yes, but in a very shy manner and you look concerned. Why are you concerned? Their feelings are not your responsibility. Stop making everything your responsibility. It is not your responsibility. Nothing is your responsibility except taking care of yourself, and you're not doing that because you're worried about other people. Stop focusing on other people because of your past. Your past does not define who you are right now. You are a completely different person, but I don't mean this in a good way. You have ruined your mental mindset for other people because you're scared of offending them, yet you should be scared of offending yourself—honey, look at yourself right now, are you happy with who you are—are you happy with your mindset—are you happy where you are right now? Fuck everyone else, I know that hurts your feelings because you care about people; you have a good heart, that's wonderful, but forget people and start focusing on yourself internally. Screw everyone else and ask yourself this question: are you happy with who you are right now or do you want to change?
It's okay to change who you are. It does not mean that you are a bad person, you're becoming one, or you're acting. You're not acting, you're changing yourself. You're evolving into a butterfly. You are in a caterpillar state. You must transform, and then you must become a butterfly. How can you expect all your desires if you won't allow yourself to grow and evolve into the beautiful butterfly that you always were?
Masterlist
Pile II.
I have never met someone who had a yearning for something they desire so much in their life but instead of chasing it so it can happen for them. They stall themselves, become lazy, and just imagine what it's like to become it. Why is your self-esteem so low if your skills are so potent and you're amazing at it? I truly do not understand where your low self-esteem comes from because you have good people in your life. And I don't understand why you think that you're not going to make it when every pathway that I'm channeling right now shows to me that you're going to make it and you're going to get all these beautiful things—you're going to become famous, and you are going to become popular. You're going to make so much money out of it. So why is wishful thinking much more fruitful than actually receiving what you desire? Why are you allowing your toxic parents' voices in your mind to tell you who you should be and who you should not be when you are free from them and you have ran away to protect your honor?
I truly do not understand why you think it's okay for you to assume that what your parents are saying [inner thoughts of them] to you right now [as you read this pile] is supposed to be okay. My love, truly I do not understand, nor does my intuition understand, nor do your friends. Or if not your friends, people who you're close with and you consider blood. You have potential and yet when it comes to yourself, you cannot honor yourself and you must run away into this corner as your parents used to torment you with. Your child self is craving for this and yet you cannot honor them. You always talk about honoring others, you always give them great advice, but when it comes to you, 'forget the advice, there is something I can do which is to crawl away into a dark space and just whine about my life and how it's not moving in the momentum that I deserve.’
My love, your skills in this—I'm telling you it is so amazing that if you were to do this, you would transform your life, other people's lives; you would be an inspiration, and you would change the world. It does not matter what you do, it could be something small, it could be something big, you will change the world.
For example, intuition says, think of Chappell Roan. She changed the industry for people when it comes to setting boundaries because when you are famous, people have expectations, give you high expectations with too much pressure, and they want to bully you without admitting that they bully you. And celebrities cannot have boundaries because they are rich. This is the mindset for most people. And that's an unfortunate situation however, in this case, she had already set boundaries. There were mixed signals but the matter of fact is she did what was best for her. So the reason why intuition says this is because you will become like her but with your own individuality and independence. You are going to change the world in your own way.
You've always been the type of person who, when you were in your toxic environment, would fit in with others and follow the crowd. Now look at you, there is no crowd to follow so now there's nothing for you to do anymore and that is why you are stalling. But what good comes from this? What if you make your own crowd? What if you pick your own people? Who do you want to be? Who do you want to see in your future?
Right now, I want you to journal. I don't care if you don't like journaling. I want you to journal what you want to see in your life, what you want to see unfold in your life, how you want to act, and how you want to dress. When you write all the things you actually like and then write down the things that you dislike, make sure you do not follow what you dislike. I know that it may seem like you will follow it, but your mind will tell you the opposite and make you follow the good things that you want to. Eventually, when you keep looking at the journal, your mind will transform, and you will want to follow the good things. The thought of following the bad things will not even be on your mind.
I want to say this one more time before I stop channeling you. You will become popular, and you will be so freaking loved that when you look back in your past, you're going to be like, ‘well, wait a minute, why the hell did I not do this’ but you must not have this mindset in the future because intuition tells me “you were supposed to find this reading for you to transform your life. If you were to do it beforehand, you would have done it for other people, and you would have scarred your inner child and yourself for life.”
Masterlist
Pile III.
Channeled song.
You have already let go of all your issues and you have already moved on. So why are you coming to see what you have to let go and move on? Why are you causing yourself inner issues when it's already let go? I know that you're addicted to pain because in your past, if you were not addicted to what you were feeling, you would not have been able to survive. Your whole body is in survival mode. You have to let it go. There is not technically a thing for you to let go and move on from other than learning to be addicted to being happy now. You're no longer in survival mode. It's time for you to move on.
Yes, this pile is contradictory, but you're also being contradictory towards yourself. Every time you have moved on from something, your mind and your body go into override and you panic, and then you have panic attacks or you have episodes, but they worsen when you're happy and you feel okay. I cannot tell you 'how can you allow this for yourself' or 'why are you allowing this for yourself' if you cannot control it.
So I will tell you what to do. When you read these next parts, I want you to take the biggest, deepest breath that you can ever do to see how long you can hold your breath in, and then hold it, and then exhale slowly, but make sure you make the exhale long. This is going to relax your nervous system, and you'll be instantly relaxed even if you do not feel it. Intuition says that you will be relaxed. Next, I want you to tell yourself these affirmations:
“I am worthy of being happy, and I know it's safe for me to be happy. I'm okay. I feel okay. My body is okay. My mind is okay. All of me is okay. I will always be okay. I'm okay.”
“I feel peace in my heart right now, and I'm no longer afraid of being happy. I am worthy of all that I desire, and I know that it's okay for me to feel happy.”
“My nervous system is completely healed. I trust myself. I love myself. And so be it.”
“I love myself. I'm sorry to myself. I'm no longer addicted to pain. I'm addicted to making myself happy. I'm addicted to making my life better. I'm addicted to being the angel on my own shoulder. To tame the beast within and to balance my good and my bad sides.”
“I'm okay. I really am. I'm not a bad person. I'm a good person. If someone says I'm a bad person, perhaps they're projecting, or perhaps I have to improve something in me, but that is only if my intuition says so. I'm okay. I'm really okay.”
I want you to take another big deep breath in, hold it, and breathe out. Make sure it's longer than the one before, and we will say these affirmations next:
“I know that finding this reading was worth it because now I feel peace. Anyone Sefina has helped, has helped me too. Each person she has helped, I feel much freer. I crave freedom, and I give myself freedom. I crave peace, and I give myself peace. I am a free-spirited person, as I always have been. I'm free, and I'm okay.”
Now take the biggest deep breath that you can. Hold it for the longest you can, and immediately when you cannot hold it, let it go all out. It does not matter how slow or how fast it is. It does not matter. Let it go.
And now I want you to tell yourself this three times.
“I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”
“I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”
“I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”
I hope that this reading has given you a sense of peace. And I also hope that you can be silly with yourself because you deserve it, and so do your inner child and future self.
So, It's almost impossible to read your description because of the pink background. Idk if that was your intention, just thought of letting you know because it's difficult to see your schedule, etc.
O. Weird, it shows a darker color on my side, I'll change it. Thank you so much for letting me know! :)
It will only take long if you make it long. It will only take long if you procrastinate. And it will only take long if you don't show yourself the kindness you show to others. You show so much warmth to others, but when it comes to yourself, you tend to ignore yourself, thinking that ‘’oh, because I show other people kindness. I don’t have to show the same to myself because the same will be shown to me.’’ It's the same saying as 'you are what you eat.' But you are eating a bad apple, and you're giving other people a good apple. You need to show the same kindness to yourself. You're neglecting yourself. And when you neglect yourself, you sabotage. Think of it with someone you love. Let's say you love me, right? And you don't like others as much as you love me, but you're giving them all these sweet messages, gestures, and actions. I'm starting to feel neglected. A part of me is feeling jealous that you aren't showing the same love; a part of me is telling myself there might be a reason why. Then you come back to me, and you tell me all these sweet things, but then your actions do not show the same as your words. And now I'm confused. It feels like "Hot N Cold" by Katy Perry. What is your choice? Why are you neglecting me? Those are the thoughts that are coming to my mind back and forth. So I use other things as a coping mechanism because I would rather not confront you. The same can be said about you.
Think of yourself as a friend or someone that you adore, but you genuinely adore, not someone as a placeholder. You need to stop thinking of yourself as a placeholder. You are someone who cares for yourself dearly, but you're treating yourself as a placeholder because you people please too much. You need to learn to balance your good heart with yourself and others and you must learn to prioritize yourself first not others. I understand that prioritizing yourself is not an easy feat when you have grown up people pleasing and protecting others. But the way to start is now, and you must tell yourself that you want to develop a friendship with yourself. And it's not going to happen instantly. It's going to take some time and that's okay. You must tell yourself it's okay. You must tell yourself, “hey, it's okay, I'm going to develop a friendship with you, and it's going to take some time. But eventually in the future, I'm going to feel so much gratitude for my past self for doing this.”
Right now it's raining as I do this reading for you, and before this I was feeling the same situation as you are, and ironically it's the same situation for me, so I understand where you are at. I know when you are inspired by others, you assume the best of them, that they cannot have the same struggles as you, but honey, everyone is actually on the same path as you reading this pile and so am I. Yes, I help other people, and I inspire them, but [like you] I forgot to take care of myself. I forgot, and I didn't even realize how much I mean to a lot of people until I did a channel reading for myself.
I'm on the same journey as you, and it's only going to happen if you allow it to come to you, so maybe in a way I'm actually just doing this reading for myself, and it's just for me, but intuition says it's also for you.. I'm happy you calmed down and you don't feel alone anymore.
Intuition tells me that you needed someone that you were inspired by to have the same journey as you, and I know that it may seem like I'm just saying it to calm your nerves, but it's true, and it's 4:44 a.m., and this is about guidance. You're being guided for a reason.
I cannot tell you how long it will take for you to have a full friendship with yourself where there are boundaries, kindness, genuineness, and generosity with yourself. But what I can tell you is that if you start now and you take it slow with yourself as you would with other people… You're going to feel the biggest weight come off your shoulders and feel like life is worth something, that life has meaning, and that if you can do this, then you can do anything else. Because all the insecurities, all that anger that you're feeling now, and all the trauma that has been unhealed right now are all based on this. You need to understand that who you are right now is worthy of love. It is worthy of companionship. And it's worthy of something more. And right now it's pouring like mad. Before it was calm. But the moment I spoke about the rain to you, it started raining like mad. This is the anger that you're feeling towards yourself. That you want to act a certain way. To fake it till you make it with yourself. That's not going to work, my love. It's not.
I've been in the same spot. It's pouring like crazy, but I've been in the same spot as you. Stop neglecting yourself. Let it go. We're both on the same journey. Let it go. You have to stop—feeling shame for this is also okay. What you have been through has been hell. It has been unbearable, and you fucking survived. And that deserves brownie points. But genuine brownie points, okay?
I hope you understand that this came from my heart, not from my intuition fully. That this is genuine. And I also hope that you do believe that I am on the same journey as you, and it's not for me to say it to calm your nerves. Like, I'm dead ass serious. And I know that I'm supposed to be a specific way to those who feel jealousy and/or insecurities because I help other people, and maybe I inspire them or something, whatever the reason is or whatever the case is, right? But the reality is I'm still human, just like you, and I'm still on this path to healing and figuring out who I am and finally making a friendship with myself.
I'm not fully there yet, but I know that when you get to the spot where I am as of now, the biggest weight is going to come off your shoulders and you're not going to care how long it's going to take. You won't. You're just going to think about what other ways you can please yourself, make yourself feel happy, respect your boundaries, and respect who you are as a person.
You will start to observe yourself and to do better. You will start to remember the little details about yourself. You're going to fall in love with yourself. And when you do, I swear to you, it's going to feel so magical. And I'm not even there yet. And I feel as magical as it is. Please treat yourself with kindness. I really hope you treat yourself with love too.
Masterlist
Pile II.
Trigger warning: all types of self-harm and stress.
What makes it easy for you to repeat a cycle that you already completed? The fact that you're healed and you have the audacity to do the same shit over and over again because you cannot handle freedom—you are allowed to feel rest, to be calm, and to be relaxed. You should not allow your trauma to decide that for you. Are they right here in person attacking you physically? I know it's mental. I understand the struggle. But are they physically attacking you? No. So why are you causing yourself harm again? Why are you thinking it's okay to cut yourself? Why are you thinking it's okay to drink again? Why are you—why do you fucking think it's okay to watch inappropriate videos? Why do you think it's okay for you to do drugs again? Why do you think it's okay for you to do all these negative things that you work so fucking hard to get rid of? Why is it okay with you? It's not okay. I'm actually very pissed off for you. I literally want to get a cup and smack you with it and I don't condone abuse, okay? That is how bad this is.
Why do you think it's okay.. because the pleasure was okay for two seconds and it felt good, but now you feel like a lot of fucking shame? This is okay with you? This is not good. Do you understand how shitty this is? Why are you sabotaging who you are as a person for a few seconds of pleasure? As you're doing it, you still feel a lot of shame and negativity toward yourself, but when it's done, you spiral out of control into a panic attack. Why is this okay?
I know that some of you desire children, so if your child was in the same position, would you encourage them? I know that you desire to have pets, but you don't have pets right now. If the same thing occurred, would you encourage them? Why are you causing yourself so much pain? What the fuck are you actually gaining from it? Truly think about it. What are you gaining from it? Yeah, you're getting a little bit of pleasure. Or maybe the feeling of sabotage is such an amazing pleasure. Okay, but why? I know that this reading is harsh. I truly understand. But I need you to read it. I need it to attack you. I need you to spiral and think about this—this is all from my intuition. I need you to think. I need you...too. I’m not going to coddle you and praise you for sabotaging yourself. Why are you reading this pile if you like that anyways? I'm not here to reassure you that you're doing the right thing and that you're on the right path, honey, you're going away from the right path, and I want to see you fucking succeed. What are you doing? You need to treat yourself with respect. If you don't treat yourself with respect, you're going to ruin your life all over again. Why do you think your worthy of sabotage and a shitty life? Honey, looking at your energy, it's like this child who's in a corner sulking and scared, sucking their thumb, and they cannot even breathe in a dark corner, and shadows are attacking them, but it just appears as sleep paralysis.
Why are you causing yourself so much pain? What are you gaining from it? Yeah, I know I'm repeating myself over and over again, but what do you gain from it? I want you to keep thinking about this each time you spiral. I want you to keep thinking about this reading, and I want you to read it over and over and over again until it becomes a fucking affirmation that has manifested, and you change your mindset. Subliminals don't work for you because you sabotage them. Affirmations don't work for you because you sabotaged them. Tarot readings don't work for you because you sabotaged them. These are all lies you put in your mind. They're still working for you, honey. You just have to be consistent with what you want. So let's try this again.
This reading as you read now, is your new end of the chapter. Don't look at angel numbers. Do not look at subliminals. Do not look at anything. Do not look at anything for signs. This is your sign right now, okay? Let's start new.
What is something that you want? You wanted the first thought that came to mind, but you changed your mind exactly into the way that you think you're supposed to. Let's try this again. What is it that you want? What is what you desire? What is it that you desire? What is it that you want? There. Instantly. Hold on to that thought and let yourself feel it. Your emotions are not your enemies, your emotions are your best friend. Your emotions are not your enemy, your emotions are your best friend.
Let's say it again. And say it with me as you scream it in your head. My emotions are not my enemy, they are my fucking friend. My emotions are not my enemy and they never were. My emotions are my best friend, my emotions are not my enemy.
People who are addicts in any form of self-harm, that thought of pain and taking control of what they've been through, that feeling is so enlightening. But even as you do the same cycle, what do you gain from it? You're causing yourself so much pain. Do you deserve pain? If I were to tell you right now, "hey, you deserve pain." How are you feeling right now? Most of you are angry. I can feel it. There's wrath in your heart. But some of you are agreeing because that's what your parents or your bullies said. Whatever the case is. Now I'm going to be mean to you so you can feel it internally. And then I'm going to be nice to you. Let's see what you prefer most because a majority of you will pick what I already know you're going to pick.
The mean version:
You are not worthy of love. You do not deserve any happiness. You do not deserve your dream life. If you were to die, people would have been happy. If you do self-harm, that's what you deserve because it's your fault. Like, you should control yourself. Like, you have depression. Oh my god, who cares? Just get up and move. You can't take a shower and get up and move. You're being pathetic. You're being stupid. Just move on from your trauma. It's not a big deal. Self-harm is not real. Depression is not real. You're just faking it. You're doing it for attention. You're seeking attention. You're so pathetic. You're like a worm. You don't deserve to feel your emotions. They mean nothing. What you preach is not the truth. You're just a loser. You're like those people who get cheated on, and they go back to their ex. That's what you are.
See, right now you feel so much anger. Me too. That made me feel disgusting but that's beside the point. You feel so much anger in your heart. You don't like any of these words. But these are the words that you tell yourself. You know that, right? Some of you have even darker thoughts that I could not even fathom to say. I felt sick. I felt too much guilt. You do the same thing to yourself. And I don't even know you, my love. I don't even know you, and I felt that much guilt. I can't even say anything anymore. I feel disgusted. I feel like I have to cleanse my mind with holy water. I feel that disgusted with myself. How can you do the same thing with yourself? I've become emotional just saying this. How can you do the same thing with yourself? Now let's say the nice things.
The nice things:
You are worthy of love. You are worthy of being validated. Your trauma is valid. What you have been through, it's hard, but the fact that you keep fighting it or trying to find other coping mechanisms, even though you can't handle it, is a beautiful thing. You trying is enough. Yeah, you're going in an endless cycle, but you're aware of it. You know it. You can't control it. But hey, at least you're trying. I think the fact that you even try to take care of yourself in the best way that you can is so mesmerizing. You're such a beautiful soul. I love everything about you. I just wish that you showed yourself much more kindness than you are showing yourself right now. I wish that you could go into the future and see how beautiful you have become. You're like a beautiful snowflake that fell in my hands, and I want to take care of you. I know that there's no way you could survive like Olaf, but hey, there are ways to protect you and preserve you to take care of you in the best ways I know. When you cry, I think you're the most beautiful soul ever. Your vulnerability is so heartwarming. I wish you could show that more often. Your soul is so beautiful. I wish you could see it yourself. I wish you could see that you deserve so many hugs. I wish you could see that you are the most beautiful, genuine soul that deserves so much love, but I wish that you would show it in the best possible ways to yourself instead of harming yourself.
Do you see how that one made you quite emotional? As it did for me too. Most of you are seeing something new in yourself; the tears that are running down your face is making you feel understood and you don't feel disgusted.
I know that some of you screenshot the mean comments, and you want to keep reading them like they're true, but if you can't do better for yourself, your inner child or your future self, can you do it for your dead parent that passed away, a dead relative, a dead pet, or even for your comfort character? Some of you want to do it for me.. can you do it for me too? I just—I want to see you succeed. I can't say how long it will take for you to succeed and get out of this mindset, but I can tell you that if you are drawn to pile I, it's also for you.
As you nurture yourself and do more positive aspects for yourself then life will be fulfiling for you; you will have a zest for life again. If you cannot show gratitude for life in the ways that you can, then learn to show gratitude to yourself for becoming self-aware and coming to this pile when you set the intention of what you needed to hear. Because I know that you set your intention for this pile. I felt it. I felt it with the song that I was listening to. This whole pile, this whole reading, all the readings I have done on this question are all based on you. You made me do this reading for you. I did not know what I was going to do before I did this reading. My love, I'm saying you manifested me to do this reading for you. That's how potent you are, but you have to see it for yourself, okay? Also, you should watch Mulan and Beauty and the Beast. There are a lot of messages for you.
Masterlist
Pile III.
How long till you manifest what you want? Some people say that manifestation is instant, while others say that it takes time and there's divine timing. When it comes to manifestation, you are the one who creates the rules. You have seen other people saying that. You are the person who creates the rules. But what does that mean? It means exactly what it says. If you know that you can manifest very quickly, then you can manifest very quickly. If you say that you manifest instantly, you will manifest instantly. If you say that it takes time and it's divine timing, then it will take some time and there it will be divine timing. But when you have these thoughts, you have to be consistent with these thoughts. You cannot say one day that I manifest instantly. And the next day say that, no, I don't manifest instantly. It's divine timing. You have to be firm on the decision you want. You cannot be indecisive.
Think about it with ordering a meal. You're going to your favorite restaurant. But today you want to do something new and out of your comfort zone. So you order a special. But when the waiter comes, you're hesitant. Why? You were so keen on doing something new that was out of your comfort zone. But now when the decision has come, you want to change your thought? You want to do the one that you're used to? Baby, when you get out of your comfort zone, you stay true to your goals. That is how you grow as a person. So when you stay true to your goal or your manifestation ideals, that is how you're growing in your manifestation abilities.
You also believe that your thoughts control your reality. No, they do not. How can you say that your thoughts control you and your manifestations? For example, let's say I am manifesting something that means a lot to me, and I have worked so hard, but I've never received it. If I thought in the way that you did, I would not have received my desire. Why? Because I'm going back and forth with my thoughts, I'm doubting myself, I'm not following my goal, and I'm not growing as a person. Actually, I'm going backwards. Think about it, which way do you want to go, forward or backwards? When you want to gain your desire, you want to go forward too, right? You don't want to backpedal. Your thoughts do not control you either. Your thoughts are there. They are a reflection of your habits, what you have done, what you have seen, and what you listen to. But you are able to change this habit. You are allowed to change your mind. If you feel like it's impossible for you to manifest instantly and you want to change these thoughts, you can. Baby steps are not a crime. You can. You can say that it takes me two weeks to manifest instantly, and when evidence appears, go with one week, then go with three days, then go with one day, and then go with instant. But you have to be firm on your goal; there's no specific time frame.
All of you think the divine timing is bullshit, but there's this thought that creeps into your mind because other people say it. But are you the other person? Are you the person saying the divine timing is true? If you know that divine timing is not true, then it's not true. What you decide right now is true. What are the thoughts in your mind saying about what manifestation is about? If it's instant thoughts, then it's instant. If it's three weeks or two weeks or one week or one day, then it's that. If it's divine timing—I know you don't believe in divine timing, but if it is, then it is. If some of you want to believe in divine timing, then you can, but that does not mean you're weak. That just means that that's how you've seen it. You see it with signs. You get readings with signs, whatever the case is, and it has happened for you. And that's your belief now. But you want to change your thoughts to get that? Then do it. Say what you want and you will receive it. Manifestation is easy.
There are different methods for you to manifest. If you believe it's going to work, then it's going to work. But if you're just experimenting, it will not work for you. Sure, you can experiment and be creative about it and see if this is true, and the evidence is going to come in. But the way that you're experimenting, it's desperation. When you experiment for a science project, right, you don't expect anything. You start with a hypothesis and a theory because of your hypothesis, etc., but there is no desperation. You're just curious. Think of manifestation as curiosity.
A playlist to describe your current energy (channeled message).
Masterlist | Paid services
Nsfw pacs | Subliminal channel
Divider.
Pile I.
Channeled playlist
Ironically, it is the whole album.. here.
Channeled message
When you listen to the album, so many messages that were unanswered will come forth to you like a clarity amulet. Everything is going to make sense, and it is going to feel like fate. You are going to feel like this whole album was made for you, that this person thought about your journey and wanted to support you. You are going to feel like you have a friend by your side who knows your story. You are going to feel angry and nauseous (some of you might feel like fainting or will vomit from anxiety symptoms, but remember these are phantom sensations) and will cry.
Lyric video only. It’s all your bottled up emotions.
You have gotten to a point where you have healed the shame that you have thought about your body, but when it comes to love, you can't allow yourself to love or love again. It's like whoever said these words to you, they made you believe that no person is ever going to love you because of your weight or how your body looks. Some of you have saggy skin because you lost a lot of weight. Some of you have scars on your body that happened because of weight loss and bariatric surgery, but you feel ashamed that you had medical help to lose weight—that you should have lost weight naturally, yet you cannot because of the syndrome or disease that you have. The rest of you feel disgusted with yourself that you became your desired weight or you healed your scar through affirmations, but even then it's like you have this chance to heal yourself when it comes to love, but you decide against it because you don't want the same past experience to be projected onto you now. You believe that if you were to love again, they would insult you to the point where you'd cry again. that they will pick up your saggy skin and be like, “look at this, this is so fucking disgusting.” You believe that if someone will love you dearly, they will betray you, then reject you, and then laugh about it because you have dealt with the same experience in another way.
But if you were to love again, you would start to realize that it's okay to have these thoughts because they are from your past experiences. They aren't here to actually hurt you, my love. They are here to tell you what you have to heal from. You don't have to try so hard to find the person for you; take all the time you need. You don't have to push yourself to fall in love again. You don't even need to be in a relationship. You don't desire it. So stop forcing yourself to be someone that you're not. There is no need to feel shame about your body. It's beautiful. I'm not saying it's beautiful because I have to tell you and that I'm trying to get over it. I'm telling you this because I truly mean it. I know that most of you don't believe that there are people who find bigger bodies, those who are insecure, those who have scars, or those who have saggy skin to be beautiful, but there are people out there.
I personally don't care about someone's weight or their looks. If you're a genuine person and my intuition can pick it up, then you're the coolest shit ever. And I keep hearing that you think, even with the words I'm saying, that you can't like a fat person, it's impossible. Um, no honey, I think chubby men are cute and sexy too. They truly are. I don't care about the weight. It's the way that they're passionate about things. The way that they light up with the things that you talk about and they're passionate about. And I'm not going to drop this on you and say that, ‘oh, chubby people are so cute because there's more fat to hug.’ No. I don't care that there's more fat that you can squeeze in and hug, who cares about that? It's the way that… with bad experiences… when you understand them and you take your time to actually get to know them, the way that they light up and the way that they project that happiness onto you, that they wanted the best for you, that they want to see you shine because you help them see them shine—that's what I find attractive about them. They're sexy to me. I don't care. I'm not going to give you a reading where I'm going to shame you for your body and then say "oh I think this about them," and become a hypocrite. My words to you are genuine; I don't even have to tell you what I think about them. That's what I'm saying—that there's no need for you to fall in love again if you have no desire. There's no need for you to be in a relationship if you have no desire. If you desire only friendship, go for friendship. This life is short. You only have one life. Some of you believe in past lives. But even then, it takes time to remember your past lives, right? So you only have one life. Do what you want in this life, and please stop feeling shame for something there is no need to feel shame about. It's okay to receive help. It's okay to be different. It's okay to have a different body type, scars, saggy skin, or whatever you want to call it. It's okay. It's beautiful.
Some of you were part of the body positive movement, but when they start to cater towards only very obese people, you start to feel insecure about yourself. Then why don't you make a body-positive movement for yourself? Show positivity for your body. Show love to yourself. Instead of sulking, allow yourself to feel beautiful… just because you are… you.
trigger warning: skinny shaming, body dysphoria, and sucide.
A lot of you have been skinny shamed, and you have overweight people telling you that, yeah, but you're skinny how can you have any issues? You're skinny should appreciate your body. You can't have an eating disorder because you're skinny, or you can't call yourself fat because you're skinny. You can't have body dysphoria because you're skinny. But, my love, these words that the people have told you—not only were they jealous of you, but they were also shaming you. And you're allowed to feel angry about it. You should not gaslight yourself and tell yourself that they are right. You're allowed to have issues just because you are on the skinnier side of things. But you're not allowed to tell yourself that...what they have said to you is right and that you are deserving of being skinny shamed. That is not allowed. Not based on what I'm saying, but based on how your body has been feeling lately.
Your body's feelings have been worsening. Lately you've been feeling a bit more suicidal than you want to admit to yourself because the people in your life… They only see you as one thing, and you know this—you know they only see you as being skinny, and that's it. That is your whole personality to them; the friends that you are with, you must get rid of them out of your life. Not only have they been draining you, but they have also been gaslighting you and making you feel less because you won't say anything, and they know they can step on you. They know they can take advantage of you, and they know that your heart is so pure and so fucking lovely that you won't say shit to them just because they're overweight or they're bigger in size.
You need to get rid of them. They are not your friend, they're not your best friend, and they will not do you any good. Not only do they want to see you kill yourself, but they want to see you do it in front of them. Their energy is so toxic and so manipulated that I honestly could not do your pile for the longest time. I kept procrastinating. I felt so sick in my stomach, and I was wondering why the fuck I had sabotaging thoughts when I'm not like that one. I'm completely healed. That is what I'm trying to tell you. That is how you have been feeling. You healed ages ago. Then you found these people because you thought that you got instant subliminal results.
The subliminal that you were using had toxic affirmations because that person was a UG creator. My love, you must flush that subliminal completely out of your mind. Listen for a week straight four times per day, and when you flush it out, you'll start to see different things in your life. Things will start to change for you, and those people will actually get out of your life. They will just ghost you first. You'll feel sad and wonder why, and then you'll remember this pile. Your intuition told you to come to this pile, this pack didn’t intrigue you because you're a very humble person, and you don't really want to think that people have things against you because you believe that humans are beautiful creatures and everyone deals with things. You believe that sometimes you'll meet people on their bad days; that doesn't give you the right to have a first impression of them that is negative, but this ideology is very, very, very toxic. You're allowed to have first impressions about people you're allowed to judge people, but you're not allowed to show that judgment to the person. You're not allowed to look straight up and tell them, "oh, you fucking suck because you're fat." You can't do that stuff. Of course you're not going to do that, but this is an example.
You're not allowed to gaslight yourself and dismiss your emotions based on your observation about a person. Sometimes people's first impression about someone is always right. Sometimes you get a natural feeling, and sometimes you're wrong, and that's totally okay. It's okay to be wrong. It's not the end of the world. It's not the end of society for you you believe that society is supposed to be beautiful they are supposed to take care of its people but the problem is society is full of greed they don't give a shit and you must realize that you must understand that you're not always going to find people who are like you who genuinely care for other people and who want the best for other people you must understand that your energy is beautiful and it must be taken care of and you must learn to be selective around people, you must not give people the benefit of the doubt, they don't always have the best intentions for you, and sometimes you have already known who is the best and who's not, but you must not do the same lesson life is trying to teach you.
You're not allowed to try to fix these negative people, you are not in here on this earth to fix people. Stop fixing other people and start fixing yourself. Start to learn to prioritize yourself first and know that it is okay to read tarot readings and have subliminals that cater towards your feelings and to help you improve your life. You're not obligated to do it instantly you can take your time on it, but remember life is very short and that if you were to do it now despite your feelings about this… it is going to help you have an easier future than if you were to take your time on it.
Please be good to yourself and learn to appreciate yourself more than assuming people will only like you because you are skinny. Understand that being skinny is not a fucking personality and that you have a heart of GOLD.
There is no shame about your body. It's more so about how you present yourself. You always believe that someone, if they were to love themselves, would present themselves as someone who is sophisticated, regardless of how you see beauty. It's always something that further with elegance or with gracefulness, but now that you've learned to love yourself, you're a bit hesitant to show your real aesthetic because it's not elegant it's very chaotic. So the problem is that... your belief about what loving yourself... it isn't actually what it's about---it's about how someone should present themselves as if they love themselves is about being modest. But now that you've realized that you're okay with how your body is, you lack that modesty. And that's okay. You're not obligated to always look modest towards other people. If you feel comfortable being modest at home, then that's okay. But if you feel comfortable being modest around friends only, that's okay too. That does not mean that you do not love yourself. Loving yourself and your fashion sense are two different things. Don't be contradictory towards how you think one thing should be, and don't have black and white thoughts. There is no logic behind it.
You are a very logical person. Everything to you is always logic only. It's never about your feelings. It's never about your intuition. It's only based on that. That is your problem. And I believe that you know this, but you won't change it because you're so comfortable with who you are. But if you want to further your love with yourself, you're going to have to learn to trust your intuition and learn about your heart. Learn about your feelings, about what you like and what you don't like. It's okay to be a different person, it's okay to change your personality, and it's certainly okay to like both modest clothing and chaotic things that don't or aren't perceived as modest.
Before I stop typing your reading, I want to mention that you should not shame other people involuntarily based on how they project their love for themselves—people's fashion is an expression of themselves… So your chaotic clothes are an expression of how chaotic your thoughts are, but the problem is this chaos in your mind isn't actually you expressing how you feel.
And intuition says, “you always believe that someone should be elegant if they love themselves because this is your actual fashion, but you are so ashamed of it since you have seen people who are elegant that don't love themselves. You don't want to be catered to by those, and you believe that other people are going to say the same about you. But people are not you. Some believe your beliefs are right, but this is based on their trauma or based on how they judge other people.”
Basically, intuition is saying that because you kept judging other people, now that judgment is stuck on you. Because you kept saying that someone is supposed to follow this, now that judgment is on you. Because you never allowed yourself to follow your own stuff just because you didn't love yourself, now that judgment is eating you alive. You must stop being a piranha to yourself and start being a good fish to yourself. Be a goldfish to yourself. Show the loving… show how the world can be gold and how you can express your fashion through your creativity.
Some of you are artists, and some of you are computer programmers, but both of them require you to be creative, so whenever you feel a boost of confidence and there are no judgmental thoughts, allow yourself to tell yourself what fashion you think is cool and what is not. Don't specifically mention anything about you or base it on those that you have judged. Focus only on what you think would look cool if they had this.
Think of playing a dress up game and you're picking the right things that you like for the character how would they look how would their hair be done how about their makeup maybe no makeup maybe how would their beard look like maybe a mix of both how would you see them as. What makes you feel warm and what makes you feel disgusted it's okay to feel disgusted about a fashion choice but it's not okay for you to constantly judge it and ruin your mindset.
There is a saying that goes, “if you can't change it, don't judge it.” The same can be said with you. If you cannot change your body, then why are you judging it? No one has initially shamed you for your body. In the past, you have. But you never cared. And now that they're no longer here, you care. It's like you're causing yourself the same issues that they had with you because you were comfortable with feeling sad. You look comfortable with feeling depressed. You look comfortable with being okay with hate.
So my words to you are just, It doesn't matter. You crave negativity. You crave it so much that you get frustrated with people when they aren't negative with you. And it's not that you think that you deserve it. It gives you a high like an adrenaline rush because you used to do dr/gs. And you stopped because it ruined your body. But at the same time, people judged you for it in the past. You didn't care. A part of you just felt good about it. Like, if they judge you, you get motivation to do better for yourself. That's not healthy, and you know this… So what I'm going to say instead is... I'm going to say the way that you crave it, the way that you need it. But I'm never going to break my morals for you and insult you in a way that you don't deserve. I'll be incredibly blunt towards you. Because when you see these words, you're going to think to yourself that perhaps you don't deserve this. Perhaps this is not worth your time, this is not motivation, and this makes you feel guilty. And in the end, you'll see a message that I want to actually give you. Let's start.
The blunt version:
When you were doing drugs and a man touched you without your permission, you should have talked about it. This is what you rightfully deserve. And you should have—you should have let him keep touching you more. You should have let him keep touching you until you started crying for him to realize that you didn't deserve this. You should have made him change himself because you believe that is what you're supposed to do in this lifetime, but it's not… Maybe if he kept touching you and making you feel uncomfortable and discussing about yourself and allowing you to spiral into your drug addiction—maybe things would have been different. Maybe in the past he wouldn't have touched you—maybe in the past your d/ad wouldn't have thought that touching you sexually when your mother was not there or your uncle… that maybe
Maybe... If you weren't… Maybe if you weren't born, your father wouldn't have gone to jail for touching you sexually when they weren't at home. Or when one of your guardians wasn't at home, maybe you were the issue in the first place. That you deserve to ruin your body through drugs. You deserve it all. That you deserve to c/ut yourself. That you deserve to… you deserve to feel this disgusting sensation about your body, that you deserve to have hate, that you deserve that you deserve it all because now it's great motivation for you to do the things that you need to do even though you can't because you suffer from autism and ADHD at the same time. You don't deserve to get treatment because no one's going to understand what you're suffering with—that your mind hyper-fixates on one specific thing, which is hate, because you believe that because you were touched when you were a child or a teenager, you believe that you deserve all these pains because you're the reason they're in jail. You're the reason why they're in jail. It's all your fault. It's everything of you. It will always be your fault because you shouldn't have existed, and you should have just let him touch you because that's what you deserve because that's your fa/ther and the fa/ther knows best, and you don't know shit, and that's what you deserve.
You believe that it is best if your guardian touches you sexually too, that if these comments were to happen again, maybe you could take back control of your life, but it's never going to happen. The blunt version was all of your thoughts and how you believe it to be. As you were reading it from someone that you trust, you care for, and you look up to. It doesn't feel so good, does it? And then knowing that this pile killed me, it doesn't feel so good, does it? And it's killing you too. Some of you are very emotional, while most of you don't believe that I could have a pile to make me this emotional, and the rest of you are so ashamed of yourself, but there is no need to feel ashamed because this is your trauma, and this is the best way you knew how to take control of it at the time, but now that you know and you're self-aware, you must stop this.
You're going to cause yourself complex PTSD, and you know that your father had it when he was touching you. He was in an episode because one of his family members did that, but that did not give him a right to do such a thing. That did not. It never will and never has. It won't.
People with complex PTSD, most of them cause themselves pain and some of them will cause pain to other people. It does not mean that you should excuse their behaviors, it means that you should make them take accountability for their wrongdoings. But you should never disrespect yourself for what they did. You cannot take control of your trauma. It's not possible. You cannot rebel against it. It's not possible. You're going to call yourself a strain. Let it go, my love. Let it go. Stop causing yourself so much shame that you cannot control.
You're not in control of your trauma. It is not your fault for causing yourself trauma. Stop doing activities that cause you trauma. My love, what are you doing? What are you gaining from this? Your pile has made me so emotional that each time I tried to type the blunt version, I was just crying every two to three sentences. I think that your pile has to be the most heartbreaking one I've done, and I still can't finish it because it's breaking my heart, but I will finish it because I want you to become a better person for yourself, not as better as in the way that people say. I want you to figure out what is better for you. I know that most of you guys are hopeless romantics, so when you think of love, what do you want your prince charming, your princess, or your person to be? How are they going to act? When you start to think about it or you write it down—some of you are very creative, so maybe if you did a presentation of it or you coded it, you made it like a game idea or a dress, or whatever you want—how do they act? How do they treat you?
I know a lot of you are going to lie to yourself, so I will say it for you. You want your person to hug you tight when you have your smiling episodes. You want your person to comfort you and reassure you of the most positive things about yourself that you are so insecure about. You want your person to love you dearly, especially during sexual intercourse. You want your person to treat you kindly during pregnancy or treat you kindly when they are pregnant. You want your person to care, to seek you for who you really are. You want your person to see how you're trying your hardest to fight against your trauma and the memories that are resurfacing. And you want them to tell you that it's okay that you're doing such a good job, that you're such a strong warrior, such a strong fighter. You want them to see that what you went through may seem easy to put on paper, but for you, you saw your father as a superhero, the greatest person ever… And then you got betrayed, and it has destroyed your brain, and some of you think that you have dissociative identity disorder or a split personality, but you don't, my love. You don't.
You suffer from complex PTSD, your autism and ADHD, the combination with it is a pain in the ass. And I'm so sorry that you're having dissociative thoughts and you think that you're losing your mind. You think that sometimes you're splitting and sometimes you're creating new personalities from trauma. I'm so sorry that you're dealing with that. You don't deserve it.
I'm looking in your past based on your energy. You don't deserve that, my love. You were such a child. Even if you were a teenager, you were still a child. You didn’t deserve that. And I'm sorry that your Nana didn't believe you. I'm really sorry. And I know I'm not obligated to apologize, but I want to tell you anyway, I'm really sorry that they didn't believe you. And I'm really sorry that they thought it was okay to shame you about it and gaslight you into believing that you were in the wrong. And I'm so sorry that your nana was watching as it happened and didn’t do anything to save you but rather enjoyed it. I'm so sorry that you were gaslighted about it when you tried to speak for yourself. I'm so sorry that you didn't get your full justice. I'm so sorry.
You want your person to believe your story. You want… those who have caused you pain and those who do not believe to dance with the devil and learn how to become better people, but you know that they never will, so your episode starts when you think about it, and when you know that they cannot, it worsens. You must stop thinking about it whenever it appears; you must learn to distract yourself with the one thing that does. I know that a lot of you guys like to rewatch the same movies, but they start to become a bit boring. So each time that you want to rewatch your favorite comfort movie, do fun activities like how many times did the character pop up? How many times did they say a specific word? How many times did a specific color appear? Or how many times did you feel certain emotions? Allow yourself to become grounded in the present moment when it's happening. Because intuition says that it's going to heal your heart, and you are going to heal through doing something that makes you feel comfortable and makes you very happy. But at the same time, don’t force yourself to make it happen instantly because there is no such thing.
What works best for you does not mean it's going to work for a friend. What works best for a friend does not mean it's going to work for you. You cannot hold yourself accountable for the mistakes that you have made in your past. What you have done in your past is based on your past self and what they knew best. You cannot blame yourself in the past for lying because they were trying to protect you and themselves from the outside world. What you can do in the present moment is show yourself care and love for allowing yourself to learn that lying to yourself is not being protective. Doing what others want is not being protective. It's self-sabotage and disrespect. Instead of forgiving yourself in the past, forgive your present moment right now. Don't think about the past. Don't think about the future. Think about now. When you think of happiness and peace, what do you actually see? Screw everyone's ideology about what happiness and peace are. What do you actually see for yourself? What comes forth? What makes you instantly relax? What makes you instantly feel happy?
Happiness for other people is completely different from your answer. Yes, you may have similar answers to other people in the world. It is normal to feel that way. There are so many people on this earth. But that is not the focus. What makes you happy right now?
Some of you desire for me to tell you what makes me happy, what makes me feel peace. But if I were to tell you that, you would have followed what I have mentioned. Stop following other people. Start following yourself.
What do you think is peaceful and happiness to you? What makes you feel excited that you want to get up and dance for it? What makes you feel calm and relaxed that you don't want to get up and do your work? What makes you feel so good about yourself that you want to compliment yourself until you're sick of yourself in the best way? What makes you feel so warm and cozy that you don't want to get up to turn off the fan? What makes you feel good? That is so important for you right now. What makes you feel good?
You need to start asking yourself questions that you ask other people. You're so curious about other people, but when it comes to yourself, it's like, "oh, okay, I know myself." No, you don't. You don't know anything about yourself. You have this idea about yourself, like you have the idea about other people, but you're projecting their thoughts, their opinions, their perspectives, and their personalities onto you.
And that is the toxicness that you cannot accept within yourself. You're being toxic to yourself, my love. You're being so toxic. You don't know who you are because you know nothing about yourself. Stop focusing on other people. Stop helping other people. Stop being people-focused. Be your own person. Learn to accept that you are not like other people. And this is not pride. This is not trying to be special. You're not. You're not.
A lot of people would love to be in your shoes. And I know that sounds a bit shitty to hear because you have lived your life where people have said the same thing to you when you were trying to express your feelings. But this is the truth, but in a positive aspect. You have free tarot readings, and it helps you. It aligns you. It brings you back to your present moment. It makes you think. It helps you mentally. It shows you your future. So why aren't you taking advantage of that and making it come to a reality in your present moment instead of the future? Yes, it will happen in the future if it resonates with you, if it's actually not based on your friends, but... you have to do the work for it to come. That's why your reading keeps changing back and forth. That's why you're a little bit too obsessed. You can calm down and relax when you see a reading, you have to ask yourself, "is it really for me or is it for a friend that I want to help?"
Pick your pile by choosing the picture you feel most drawn to with your intuition! Thanks to @drinkthesky for the cute dividers! I hope you enjoy the reading! 🤎✨🕯️
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Pile 1 🍞
You're someone who has been through a lot in their life, you've got a lot of responsibilities. You've always felt a strong need to look after everyone else around you, taking on their problems as your own and trying to solve them as best as you can. And you make it seem effortless. You carry the world on your shoulders and you make it appear that it doesn't weigh you down at all, as if the world itself is as light as a feather. I want you to know that your loved ones do wish that you would take a rest and not be so worried about everyone else for once, so please take some time for yourself. It's not your responsibility or duty to take care of everyone, I feel that it's just how you are but at some point you will burnout and you don't want to feel resentful about your loved ones for it. But, they love how you care so deeply, and how responsible and reliable you are. Responsibility is a huge thing here. I feel you might've had to be the parent in your family whilst your actual parents weren't very mature. Without the toxicity of it all, I feel your younger siblings (if you have any) and friends are super grateful for the role model that you are. They know they can rely on you if they need any help. You'll be there, any time and anywhere, day or night to help with whatever problem they have big or small. You are their lighthouse in the night. When they're so wrapped up in chaos and don't know how to make it out, you appear in their life, beautiful and radiant, illuminating a path forward for them to make it out the other end. That's so beautiful. They love you so much for it and feel so grateful to have you in their lives. Everyone should have someone like you in their lives. You are the shining dawn after a night of torment. A breath of fresh air, though cold and exposing of the night and what actually no longer serves them, still a reminder of what life could be like and a chance at a new beginning.
You've had to walk away from a situation that you didn't think you was going to survive. I feel that you're in a better place now, but the fact that you managed to walk away in the first place, people love that you had the strength to do that. You realised you deserved a better life for yourself and you left all that you knew to start over again. Starting over in life is terrifying and a lot of people never get the nerve to do it, but for you, after the first redo, it just seems to get easier. You might even look forward to having to start over. You're capable of surviving the worst so when you finally have your life in your own hands, it feels liberating. There's a huge relief and freedom to it. People love that you trust in yourself and in the cycles of life. You know your hard work will pay off one way or another. You can have as many new beginnings as you wish. The fact you can leave the last place you was in, move to somewhere else and make new friends from scratch. It's commendable, truly! People love the fact that you know you're worth and know that you'd be a credit to anyone. Even after all the shit you've been through, you still know how to have fun too! There's a balance of wisdom and whimsy. Your zest and joy for life isn't naivety, it's a kindness and softness that you conserved despite the hardships you've faced. You defended your softness with tooth and nail; it's very much hard-earned. And despite everything, you're still you. That same kindness you extend to others, it changes their lives, and they recognise how hard you fought to keep kind and they're in awe of you. They especially recognise this when in one-to-one conversations or small groups and you're giving them advice. They love your undivided attention because for that brief time, they feel like the centre of the universe. You make them feel so special by giving them your time and love.
You are invaluable. You know intimately the cycles of death and rebirth, transformation and transmutation. How you keep evolving over and over again. Bettering yourself each and every day. That's what people love most about you 🤍🌙✨
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Pile 2 🐈
You're both imaginative and grounded. You have big dreams but you're not afraid to work hard to make them reality. You're very creative and always have a lot of ideas. You're like an endless stream of ideas, daydreams and emotions, and people love that. You definitely pour into your own cup first and let the excess flow to your loved ones. You're unapologetically yourself and let yourself show up in whatever way you're feeling at that time. You don't care if it's messy; it's real and authentic. You're emotional and sensitive but that only means you're truly empathetic. You have a lot of emotional intelligence. You experience the spectrum of all emotion and feeling, and that gives you a deeper understanding of how other people feel. You can honestly relate to how other people feel, why they feel the way they do and help them understand why they react they way they do. You truly take the time to understand someone to their core, all the good and the bad. People love that you treat them with care, that you gently hold a place for them to feel all their emotions safely. You accept them as they are, not wanting to change them, just to give them perspective on themselves. You accept even the parts of themselves that they find undesirable, even 'ugly' I'm hearing. To you, it's all part of the human experience, which I definitely agree with! You're by that person's side, through the good and the bad, through the highest highs and lowest lows. You know how to navigate the tumultuous feelings of pain and grief and how to truly celebrate with happiness and joy. One emotion is not better than the other. To be able to feel as vastly and variable is all part of being a human and living life. You're patient, no matter how calm or stormy the seas are, you just turn up. You're present and you show up and trust yourself to know when you assessed the situation how to navigate it. That empathy and patience is something people really love about you.
You rely on your intuition a lot, and it's never failed you. You know how the situation will play out and you act accordingly, even if people don't understand why you take the actions you do, you still come out the other end whilst everyone else is scrambling. You just needed time. Your intuition guides you and whilst not everyone understands, you do understand. After a few times of seeing how accurate your intuition is, other people start paying attention, and suddenly your ideas and actions don't seem so weird or ridiculous. The people that realise this love this about you. They feel you're being divinely guided and protected by angels and spirits, like you're God's favourite and you are.
You're incredibly kind and nurturing. You are a safe place for a lot of people, you bring comfort and you definitely do not judge people. A lot of people who don't have that, cherish and love that so much, and are incredibly grateful to have you in their life. You're not afraid to share what you have either, especially your love and time. You always seem to know the right thing to do, you've got a lot of potential to make it far in life. You're definitely wifey material. That's what people love most about you 🧡💐☀️
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Pile 3 🕯️
People can trust your judgement. Whenever there's an argument, they'll come to you to see if they was right or wrong because they trust that you'll tell them the truth, and they'd listen to your criticism. You're fair and you can see both sides of an argument, and people listen because you're a very honest and authentic individual yourself, and people love that about you.
You go after your heart's desire but you're logical about it. You don't fly away with the fairies. You're real. You'll offer kind words and practical solutions. There's emotion behind your actions and words but you don't overwhelm and keep things comfortable. You are optimistic and always find the silver lining to any situation. It's a way of coping for you, but you're not wrong about your assessment either. You're not lost. You know where you're going and know what you want, and you're not afraid to go after it. You've been knocked down before by life. You've had the rug pulled beneath your feet and got up again. You have witness firsthand the chaos of life and you're not afraid to look the storm in the eye. When shit is hitting the fan and it feels like the whole world is crumbling around you, you're not afraid to get to the bottom of why it's happening. You don't run away, you don't cower and hide, you confront it head on despite how you're feeling. You appear fearless to your loved ones and a true pillar of support and stability, and they love that a lot. They're grateful for that and are in awe of the fact that you will confront of darker parts of life. When there's nothing left of the life you had before, you look amongst the rubble and find where the instability was, where the weaknesses and fractures started from. When life gives you lessons, you learn them. You actually do the inner work. You transmute the pain into wisdom, and you don't repeat the same mistake twice.
A lot of people are too afraid to actually get to know themselves on a deep level or hold themselves accountable. You absolutely are not. You know your demons and their names. You know how they show up for you in your day-to-day life. It reminds me of the lyric in Arsonist's Lullaby by Hozier: 'Don't you ever tame your demons,
But always keep them on a leash'. Maybe you should listen to that song, I think it definitely embodies you very well. You take the time to reflect, to think about how your life experiences have shaped you and how that plays out. You do the shadow work of understanding and resolving anything that hasn't been so it doesn't hold you back. You know that after getting knocked down over and over again that if you haven't resolved any inner conflict, the foundation that you build in life will not last. It won't be solid and it'll crack and fall again. This wisdom and maturity is deeply appreciated and adored by your loved ones. They feel you have the potential to go very far in life. They trust that you know the right way because you're extremely intelligent. They are in awe of how you actually confront any inner conflict and don't just ignore it or suppress it. I feel like there's been a family generational curse that you're breaking by resolving these issues whilst previous generations just buried it, not realising or having the strength themselves to resolve it. For that, you are a beacon of hope for your loved ones. That all is not loss or doomed because they have you. That's what they love most about you. It's definitely not easy at all, which is why no one else broken the cycle yet, so you should be incredibly proud of yourself 🤍🪐✨
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Pile 4 🤎
People love how generous you are in your relationships. Relationships of all kind: platonic, familial, romantic, and even strangers - you never let someone go without and don't like leaving people out, you make everyone feel welcome. If someone needs something, you won't hesitate to give them what they need if you have it or help them get it. You're generous and kind nature is truly appreciated by those around you. You give so freely because you know the universe will repay your kindness tenfold. Even if you don't have a lot, you give like you do, and in turn, you become even more abundant for it.
You're emotional intelligent, you have a good understanding of people and don't let yourself make impulsive decisions. You have a lot of self-control and always operating in your own best interest. You definitely take care of yourself because you understand that if you don't, then who will? Self-care and having that time to rest and recuperate is sacred to you. You have your own self-care rituals that you stick to, and people love that you value yourself so highly. It doesn't make you stuck up, it reinforces boundaries so people can't take advantage of you, they know who you are and how you treat yourself so they can't lower your standards for you, not that you ever should! You're not afraid to say what you expect from others because you hold yourself to those same standards, if not, you have even higher standards for yourself. You have a lot of self-respect and that invites other people into your life with the same respect for you. You very much embody 'the wolf does not concern themself with the opinion of sheep', and people eat that up and love it! You have people in your life that you value, and you let them know it, you're not afraid to express your love for them and they feel deeply appreciated for that. Those who do not give you the same love and respect you give yourself have no place in your life. They can complain and make excuses as much as they wish but, they're just simply not on your level. They think you're still on the same playing field, but you're not, you're on a different planet! You're better than that! This self-respect and role model example that you are shows the people in your life that they deserve the same, and they love that you showed this to them. They're incredibly grateful that they have someone as supportive, generous, kind as you.
It's not that you've always felt this way. You've had to learn the hard way of not being treated with the love and respect you deserve. You was trapped and couldn't find a way out. When you realised that there's more for you out in the world, you started going for it at full speed. You help remind people who are stuck just like you were that there's more to life that they deserve! That's incredibly beautiful. You teach them that they're worthy of love and the life they want to have. You lift them up and support them, and they love that so much about you and it makes you unforgettable knowing you saw their worth before they realised they had any 🧡🌷🎀
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Thank you so much for reading this pac! I hope you enjoyed it! If you wish to have a personal tarot reading, please don't hesitate to reach out! Wishing you the very best, much love 🤍🪐🌟
You are someone who puts others in their place. You do not allow others to try to control you, and you are not someone who settles for less. You know what you want, especially in the work field. And if you identify as a woman, you know how hard it is and the neglect that comes with it. So instead of allowing other people to make fun of you or catcall you, you let their words be the fuel to your motivation. The problem is that you hide this part of you. And if you were to showcase this to others, not only would you improve yourself in your work field, in your knowledge about your job and about the world, impress your boss, your coworkers, other people would stop catcalling you and making fun of you, and you would feel a connection to yourself.
I understand that hiding a part of yourself is important. Almost everyone does it. But at the same time, intuition's telling you to embrace the best parts of yourself instead of acting like this shy, fearful person. You're not going to wow people when you become yourself. It's more internally impressing them, and they want to become like you, so it'll feel like they're copying you, but they're no. They're going to be very, very, very inspired, and they're going to tell you that they're inspired by you. You're going to become an inspiration for other people to change, and that's going to help you get a promotion very very fast. I literally heard the flash in my head and saw a vision of him. That's how fast you are going to gain it.
One thing intuition wants me to let you know is to take it slow when you reveal this part of your personality, don't go all the way in because you're going to burn yourself out. People burn out in all different ways—some people burn out if they go extreme, some people burn out if they don't do the things they love, and in your circumstance, you're going to burn out if you don't go with the flow. You are someone who goes with the flow even if you won't admit it to yourself, and you can use that to your advantage with yourself only. Do not take advantage of others. I'm hearing that some of you were thinking about it; don't be the person who ruins everything that you work hard for. Learn to care about your reputation a little bit, not so much, because it can help you get a promotion.
When the sun goes up and allows the moon to come down, the sun does not take the spotlight of the moon, nor does the moon take the spotlight of the sun. There is an equal balance. You work with a partner romantically or not, or you have a co-worker that you're very close to. The problem is that your partner or your co-worker has the worst intentions for you.
A lot of you already felt suspicious of them. If you are with someone, they are cheating on you, and if it's a co-worker, they're plotting for you to get demoted, or they want you to embarrass yourself so you can be fired.
I wish I could say more about the best way for you to get a promotion but based on your energy and how you're deciding what to do and what not to do. It's kind of like you trust yourself, but ever since you trusted your intuition a while ago, you're hesitating about it, you believe it's not true because you trusted your gut, and it did not work out in your favor. It was something huge, you took the risk. The risk did not work out, and now you don't trust your gut anymore. The problem is that was your anxiety and not your intuition. Whenever you're near the person, you feel icky and uncomfortable, like something is watching you. That would be your intuition warning you. Intuition says that if you do remove them out of your life and you work on yourself mentally, in a few months, you'll be able to get a promotion and a new role in your job.
You are someone who has been authentic for most of your life because you were taught that being authentic is powerful. But you started to realize that being authentic is quite dangerous. A lot of people have taken advantage of your golden heart. And you are still fighting with yourself that being authentic is powerful. But when you're authentic, you're an easy target. Both are true when they are balanced.
Intuition says that “when you learn to balance both beautiful aspects of your heart, you allow opportunities and magic to come forth.” What intuition means is that your golden heart and your knowledge about being authentic are your power; you're like a witch or wizard who has mastered their craft, and now you need to learn how to use your authenticity as a weapon. You don't have to be manipulative—you don't have to manipulate them back because I know that you know about how to manipulate someone. You've done your research. What you can do instead is, when they try to take advantage of you, act oblivious. Don't call them out on their bullshit. Just be nice. Smile. Think of Selena Gomez's song, Kill Em With Kindness. The same thing can be said here. Intuition says that when you do that, they're going to leave you alone and spread sweet rumors about you. And when the rumors are spread, people are going to tell you, “oh my God, you're so sweet. People used to say this [mean things] about you, but it was never true.”
Most of you are victims of bullying, so seeing these rumors spread is going to lift something out of your heart that you didn't think was possible. You're not going to get a promotion for using your powers, but you will get a promotion because of these positive rumors spreading about you. Your boss never truly liked you only liked you based on the skills and the resources you could provide for the company, but now it's like you're destined to be promoted no matter what you do.
There is another part of you that does not believe this after having so many hopeless moments with videos that you have seen, using subliminals [that failed], and reading other tarot readers’ work, so intuition wants to tell you signs that you will see:
Birds
Lions
Wizard of Oz
Dinosaurs
Halloween decorations
Red thumbnails for music
Kim possible (the show)
Word “hurt”
Word “love”
Word “tarot”
When you start to see them, keep telling yourself this: “I am worthy of getting everything I so desire. This is it. This is for me, and this is something that I have always deserved.” And as you keep saying this, your mind will shift, and you're going to start to believe that you are magic.
Hello everyone, I had a question. I wanted to know what days are the best for you? I have noticed my engagement is failing me, and quite frankly, the idea of quitting doesn't please me. I have three questions and this time, it'll be organized.
You can use an online converter to tell the time for you. For example, type your time zone (and the word) to, then mine, and then converter. It will appear as "your time zone to est converter."
What 'time' of day?
7 PM
8 PM
9 PM
10 PM
Voting ended onOct 8, 2025
Sefina comment: WAA I didn't think it would be night.
Hello everyone, I had a question. I wanted to know what days are the best for you? I have noticed my engagement is failing me, and quite frankly, the idea of quitting doesn't please me.
I have three questions and this time, it'll be organized.
