clean gloves hide dirty hands

she/her, a grown woman | Better Call Saul | assorted bullshit

[lovethatsoothes]

“To Make a Long Story Short”

Stephen Andrade’s wonderful pulp-style tribute to Clue (1985)

Prints and original artwork available at nineteeneightyeight.com or through @galleries1988 on Instagram :)

[benelopes]

constantine, 2005

[seraphtrevs]

FIC: Cold Comfort (9/?) PAIRING: Walt/Jesse RATING: E for Explicit - 18+ only WARNINGS: Age gap, infidelity, poorly negotiated but mutually enthusiastic kink (see tags for more detail) SUMMARY: Season 3 AU. Walt agrees to let Jesse stay with him after rehab, but he’s caught off guard when Jesse moves from the couch to his bed. As their affair heats up, Walt thinks he'll be able to win Skyler back and keep Jesse on the side—but Jesse's got other plans. Realized I haven't advertised my fic here for a while - I'm having so much fun with this one! When I started it, I hadn't realized that it was going to be as funny as it turned out, but it's a full blown dark comedy with lots and lots of extremely raunchy sex. There's something about being in Walt's POV that defies being taken seriously, because he is a clown. I think I'm at the halfway point, and I'm super-excited for an upcoming twist because Walt's heading for a big comeuppance. 👀 But I'm being very indulgent with this fic, so they are going to end up together forever, partners in business and in love. Which is, of course, terrible for them, and the world at large, but wonderful for me - and hopefully for you too!

And here's a link to start from Chapter One on AO3

[baratheonpilled]

A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms 1.01

[mortalityplays]

This is a dangerous sentiment for me to express, as an editor who spends most of my working life telling writers to knock it off with the 45-word sentences and the adverbs and tortured metaphors, but I do think we're living through a period of weird pragmatic puritanism in mainstream literary taste.

e.g. I keep seeing people talk about 'purple prose' when they actually mean 'the writer uses vivid and/or metaphorical descriptive language'. I've seen people who present themselves as educators offer some of the best genre writing in western canon as examples of 'purple prose' because it engages strategically in prose-poetry to evoke mood and I guess that's sheer decadence when you could instead say "it was dark and scary outside". But that's not what purple prose means. Purple means the construction of the prose itself gets in the way of conveying meaning. mid-00s horse RPers know what I'm talking about. Cerulean orbs flash'd fire as they turn'd 'pon rollforth land, yonder horizonways. <= if I had to read this when I was 12, you don't get to call Ray Bradbury's prose 'purple'.

I griped on here recently about the prepossession with fictional characters in fictional narratives behaving 'rationally' and 'realistically' as if the sole purpose of a made-up story is to convince you it could have happened. No wonder the epistolary form is having a tumblr renaissance. One million billion arguments and thought experiments about The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas that almost all evade the point of the story: that you can't wriggle out of it. The narrator is telling you how it was, is and will be, and you must confront the dissonances it evokes and digest your discomfort. 'Realistic' begins on the author's terms, that's what gives them the power to reach into your brain and fiddle about until sparks happen. You kind of have to trust the process a little bit.

This ultra-orthodox attitude to writing shares a lot of common ground with the tight, tight commodification of art in online spaces. And I mean commodification in the truest sense - the reconstruction of the thing to maximise its capacity to interface with markets. Form and function are overwhelmingly privileged over cloudy ideas like meaning, intent and possibility, because you can apply a sliding value scale to the material aspects of a work. But you can't charge extra for 'more challenging conceptual response to the milieu' in a commission drive. So that shit becomes vestigial. It isn't valued, it isn't taught, so eventually it isn't sought out. At best it's mystified as part of a given writer/artist's 'talent', but either way it grows incumbent on the individual to care enough about that kind of skill to cultivate it.

And it's risky, because unmeasurables come with the possibility of rejection or failure. Drop in too many allegorical descriptions of the rose garden and someone will decide your prose is 'purple' and unserious. A lot of online audiences seem to be terrified of being considered pretentious in their tastes. That creates a real unwillingness to step out into discursive spaces where you 🫵 are expected to develop and explore a personal relationship with each element of a work. No guard rails, no right answers. Word of god is shit to us out here. But fear of getting that kind of analysis wrong makes people hove to work that slavishly explains itself on every page. And I'm left wondering, what's the point of art that leads every single participant to the same conclusion? See Spot run. Run, Spot, run. Down the rollforth land, yonder horizonways. I just want to read more weird stuff.

[spuffygifs]

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER | S7E15: Get it Done (requested)

[tinkthatsme]

#they even match their outfits #spuffy #s7 Spuffy unmatched #btvs #spike x buffy

[letmeinimafairy]

A recent commission, back to the cave. Slowly started creating some kind of a story in cave paintings in my head, a continuation of the ammonite cave.

[bewbin]

EVERYOBODY GET DOWN HES TAKING A CREATIVE LIBERTY

[hocketing]

i am sooo pro-cheating in fiction omg wdym you want them to ethically break things up with their significant other before getting together that actively makes it less hot 🙄 like literally whats the point then 🙄 bring back UNETHICAL NON-MONOGAMY!!!!

[klapollo]

Washington Post is paywalling the article but it looks like Taylor Farms — a consumer bagged salad brand that also supplies produce to grocers and fast food chains like Taco Bell, Walmart, McDonald's, Chipotle, Burger King, KFC, and Meijer —may be at least one of the sources of the current cyclosporiasis outbreak.

Taylor makes bagged greens, salad kits, chopped salads, the works. Keep avoiding supermarket greens, but keep an especially close eye out for this brand/supplier. The above list of grocers and fast food chains is NOT exhaustive, so please continue getting lettuce and other raw produce taken off your burgers, sandwiches, etc.

[triplehamburgerjack]

Their other brand is EARTHBOUND ORGANICS!!!

[spikelleberrygin]

If given the chance to change your height, would you want to

(4'11" or under) be taller

(4'11" or under) be shorter

(4'11" or under) stay the same

(5' - 5'7") be taller

(5' - 5'7") be shorter

(5' - 5'7") stay the same

(5'8" - 6'2") be taller

(5'8" - 6'2") be shorter

(5'8" - 6'2") stay the same

(6'3 or more) be taller

(6'3 or more) be shorter

(6'3 or more) stay the same

Remaining time: 1 day 17 hours

[seraphtrevs]

I love that of the hannilalostat trio, Lalo is the goody-two-shoes. They're all discussing how they seduced their boyfriends, and Hannibal is like, "I framed him for murder by shoving the severed ear of our adopted daughter down his throat 😌", and Lestat's like, "I waited for his brother to commit suicide, drove him to the brink of insanity via telepathy, and then killed the priest while he was in the middle of confession 😌"

And Lalo is like, "...I gave him a promotion, y'all are freaks."

And Hannibal and Lestat say that was a rookie mistake - what he should have done was kill his father and then frame him for it. That definitely would have worked.

[chchommers]

Someone needs to write a fanfic about lalo framing nacho for his fathers death, it could be such a good DD:DNE fic.

If no one else does ill go insane and do it myself (please someone)

[seraphtrevs]

the problem with "reimagings" of classic lit excpet now the female character is badass is that like. It's not a very imaginative reimagining if all of the reimagined female characters have the same bog standard "YA female protagonist" personality, is it?

[goldcrescent]

and you can’t even just enjoy the old version bc d*pp is the lead……….

[goldcrescent]

It’s actually worse than you think, the whole thing is actually going to be an adaptation of an upcoming booktok reimagining of sleepy hollow

[sunderwight]

The problem with studying the deep ocean is that humans need light to look at things, the depths of the ocean are extremely dark, and what lives there is accustomed to spending most of its time in that darkness. So when we go down there with submersibles and turn on Big Lights to see, we invariably and dramatically alter what's going on, in the same way that it's generally difficult to observe the natural behaviors of terrestrial animals if you whip out a megaphone and shout HEY GUYS WHAT ARE YOU DOING at them first.

[adizzyninja]

A humble snubnose eelpout on its way to the whale fall buffet when some nearby humans give it a quick, unintrusive study:

[julianova44]

I put this in the comments but feel it needs a reblog- Check out some of Dr Edith Widder’s work on light in the deep sea! Among other things, she used the bioluminescence of stoplight fish to deduce wavelengths which most deep sea animals can’t perceive and used that to create light filters to be able to film with minimal disturbance! And that’s how we got 25 minutes of giant squid footage!!!!

[bearballing]

me when i

uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[corneliaavenue-ao3]

Reblog to give prev the power to write their fanfiction

[gnar-slabdash]

Reblog to give prev the TIME to write their fanfiction

[cutebutalsostabby]

Reblog to give prev the hocus focus to write their fanfiction.

[septic-dr-schneep]

Reblog to give prev the energy to write their fanfiction

[imsopopfly]

Reblog to give prev the executive function to write their fanfiction