joshua didn't mean to peek, but he was now too far gone to claim being innocent.
he has always enjoyed cleaning day. it might seem annoying, maybe even a little dull to some people, but cleaning day meant getting down memory land with the many stuff he always found inside boxes on the wardrobe, or the basement, or sometimes even random drawers; it meant finding pieces of papers, theaters tickets, parking tickets, hospital bills - any and everything that proves that you two has been living a life together.
and, right now, it meant finding your old journal slash diary slash the notebook you used to always carry around when you two were younger, still getting to know each other.
again, he didn't mean to peek - to sit down on bed, open your notebook on a random page and smile at the memories you wrote down because you didn't want to forget -, but curiosity got the best of him, and well...
"i saw joshua today. he was wearing a light blue blouse, his hair was slightly darker than it was the last time i saw him. it suits him, i like it.
he took me to this coffee shop downtown, somewhere calm and private - appearently he goes there from time to time, sometimes with seungkwan, most times by himself -, and we drank what i think it's the best mocchiatto i've ever had. 10/10, honestly. the pastries were good too.
but, in the middle of everything, i realized something.
i'm gonna marry this guy.
gosh, i'm so gonna marry him. if he doesn't pop the question one day then i will, but i'm gonna marry him - and we're gonna be happy. one day we'll be sharing a home, cooking dinner together as he complains about his company. one day he will hold me close while sleeping because i'll be slightly sick, i never know how to not overwork myself - but he will, and he'll take care of me, scold me for that.
one day we're gonna host a christmas dinner party at our own place, with lights decorating our living room, our friends feasting and drinking, celebrating with us. one day too that same house will feel too big, as i'll be alone in our bedroom and joshua will be at the kitchen, both our hearts broken after a fight we'll probably never forget, but that will make us stronger.
and one day... one day the house will feel too small, as our kids run around, picking at each other and tiring us out; we'll sigh, tired, but smile at each other afterwards, because they will be the biggest proof of our love.
for now, i'm happy enough that i'll see again him next weekend."
joshua smiles to himself, his eyes glassy. he didn't know you felt that way, you've never told him - but he remembers that date at the coffee shop, and he remembers very clearly the moment you burned your tongue with the hot mocchiatto. that was the moment he decided he wanted to marry you too.
"josh, can you hel- what are you doing? i thought you were almost done here", you groan, walking into the room. "i need you at the kids' bedroom, i'm trying to pick some toys to donate at your church next week."
joshua looks at you. he doesn't say a word, just nods at you. "yeah, i'm coming."
"you better be, mr. hong!"
and as you're almost leaving the room- "hey, baby!"
joshua sneaks your notebook under his pillow before you could notice what he was holding, and gets up. he smiles at you again, walking slowly to you as if he's in a movie. once you're face to face, he doesn't say a word again, just stands there - and very softly places a kiss on your lips.
"thank you for choosing me."
