🌺fatty patty🌺 @shadydreammakerbandit - Tumblr Blog

radicalapollo

Fuck you, now you get to see it in video form, because fuck you.

kaizo-ningen-deactivated2021100

moscowdiscow-deactivated2017011

this was animated by a man with anterograde amnesia who kept forgetting the last 10 frames he drew

midtown120blues-deactivated2018

Sorry to bring this back but I haven’t slept in weeks wondering how she could possibly be alive if eating one chicken nugget is this fucking difficult for her

mosticonicposts

certified iconic post

unyanizedcatboys

chronicconfusion

I am loving the notes section

shadydreammakerbandit

I'm decomposing in the ground because of this

healthmotivatedmomma-blog

Chickpea summer salad (198 cal)

Chickpea summer salad with cucumber, tomato & feta

1 english cucumber, seeded and diced

10oz cherry tomatoes, halved and seeded

¼ cup roughly chopped italian parsley

1 can chickpeas, drained and rinsed

¼ cup chopped red onion

2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil

2 tbsp white balsamic vinegar

½ tbsp lemon juice

1 tbsp honey

½ teaspoon minced garlic

Salt & pepper

½ cup feta cheese

In the bottom of a lidded bowl, whisk olive oil, vinegar, lemon juice, honey salt & pepper to create a vinaigrette. Toss in washed, chopped vegetables, rinsed beans and parsley. Toss gently to combine and coat. Cover and refrigerate until ready to serve. Before serving toss in crumbled feta cheese.

sweetcherryslim

Healthy Homemade Pumpkin Spice Latte - 83 kcal/1g protein

Servings: 1 - 83 kcal/1 g protein

8 ounces brewed coffee, or 1-2 shots of espresso

1/2 cup unsweetened vanilla almond milk

3 Tablespoons pumpkin puree

1/2 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice

1/2 teaspoon vanilla

2 teaspoons maple syrup, or sweetener of choice

sprinkle of cinnamon

With a handheld frother or blender: In a cup or sauce pan, mix together almond milk and pumpkin. Cook on medium heat on the stove top or microwave for 30-45 seconds. Remove from heat, stir in vanilla, spices and sweetener, place in a cup and use a frother to foam the milk. You can also use a blender — just process for 30 seconds or until foamy. Pour coffee into a large mug, add the foamy milk mixture on top. Sprinkle with cinnamon and enjoy!

With milk frother: add the pumpkin, pumpkin pie spice, vanilla and maple syrup to your hot coffee. Froth cold almond milk in the Breville milk frother and pour over coffee. Sprinkle with cinnamon and enjoy!

beingskinnyismydream1

Workouts You Can Do In Bed

To Get Rid Of The “Are You Pregnant?” Belly :

20 crunches

35 sit ups

10 full body crunches

50 crisscrosses

10 wide leg cross sit ups

20 leg raises

To Get Rid Of The Jello Like Thighs :

100 pillow squeezes

30 side leg lifts (Each side)

To Get That Bubble Butt :

40 butt bridges

25 lying kick backs (Each side)

50 clam lifts (Each side)

20 forward kicks (Each side)

30 knee tucks (Each side)

There is literally no reason why you shouldn’t be doing these workouts ESPECIALLY if you’re in bed. You can do this! You reach that UGW

Made by: ThisIsAnaMyFriend

painfoxexe

・✧・Booty Builder Work-Out・✧・

[10] Burpees *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[0:30] Jump Side Lunges *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[50] Bridges *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[45] Pulse Squats *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[40] Lunges *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[1:00] High Knees *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[1:00] Fast Feet *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[30] Donkey Kicks *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[15] Fire Hydrants *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[2:00] Wall Sit *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

・✧・✧・✧・✧・✧・✧・✧・✧・✧・✧・✧・

Excercise examples are hyper-linked !

Remember to drink water throughout and take breaks when needed ( ´ ▽ ` )b

the-youtube-addict-deactivated2

How to ACCURATELY calculate calories burned while working out!

We have all seen those cute “easy 100 calorie workout” posts. But sadly, those calories burned aren’t always accurate to what your weight it. A person who weighs 180 pounds is going to burn more calories than someone who weighs 135 pounds. So I’ve done the math behind how to get a perfect count

KEY THINGS TO REMEMBER

• Each workout has their own level of intensity which will therefore burn different amounts of calories

• To get an accurate count, each exercise must be done for a full minute without stopping.

HOW TO CALCULATE

• Each exercise below has a matching decimal

• Take the decimal associated with whatever exercise you did and multiply it by your current body weight

• That number will tell you how many calories you burned in one minute of that exercise

Squats~ .096

Push-ups~ .037

Crunches~ .022

Planking~ .022

Jumping jacks~ .037

Arm Circles~ .007

Mountain climbers~ .059

Lunges~ .059

Donkey/Back kicks~ .030

Walking~ .014

Running/sprinting~ .096

Stairs/ Stair climber~ .044

Weight Lifting~ .022

Box jumps~ .096

Burpees~ .059

EXAMPLE

For a 135 pound person- one minute of burpees will burn roughly 8 calories a minute

For a 180 pound person- one minute of burpees will burn roughly 11 calories a minute

I hope this helped any confusion of how to accurately count calories with out the use of a Fitbit, calorie tracker app, or just guessing. Happy exercising!

charlotteschamomlie

low cal pancakes

super pancakes {70 cal}- @lowcal-snacks

pancake/waffle batter {123 cal}- @desxlation-boy

low cal pancakes {11 cal}- @daintyecolesbian-blog

oatmeal pancakes {40 cal}- @history-of-walking-upright

banana pancakes {50/60 cal}- @kyotonakimo

pumpkin spice pancakes {126 cal}- @lonroeloo

chocolate pancakes {118 cal}- @wannabealice6

easy pancakes {33 cal}- @notskiiny

fluffy pancakes {250 cal}- @bunny-recipes

sugar free gulten free pancakes {total 546 cal}- @dainty-daffodil-dreams

three ingredient pancakes {total 184 cal}- @fitniclifts

blueberriepancakes {190 cal}- @skinnyfood

oat fiber pancakes {108 cal}- @dried-piece-of-celery

slavery

macbethz

Fuck I’m at a fencing tournament and literally a minute after I reblogged this my dad told me that he talked to the point people and I’m probably going to win a medal.

seananmcguire

BURN BAGEL BURN

gothiccharmschool

OH WHY NOT?

harukami

I need to follow up to say I reblogged this last night, and this morning I got some of the best news of my life, like, a life dream come true news thing.

Bagel what are your powers

acabosetotal

FUCK, I though it was just another lucky meme but LISTEN. Since a week ago I was waiting a phone call to confirm me if I got a job or not in my university. I reblogged this yesterday’s night “just for fun and because I don’t want any bagel to be mad with me”, and today’s afternoon, while I was losing my time as always, the professor I was supposed to work with called me and asked me for my personal information to start working with her.

THE BAGEL POWERS ARE WAY TOO MUCH FOR THIS WORLD

token-white-friend

I GOT A JOB THE DAY AFTER MY QUEUE POSTED THIS THE FIRST TIME AND I JUST REALIZED IT WHEN I SAW IT AGAIN HOLY GOD

noodle-dragon

The bagel hasn’t let me down yet!

blackcatgodess

I got a job offer after reblogging the bagel. Believe in the bagel!

anayely420

🙏🏼

sonsfantasies

Worth a try lol

theblizzardsix

i could use some good news or even a good girl

pantspooplover

Go lil bagle! Show me your power!

itaachiyama-moved

Okii then!

blastlight

THIS IS THE FIRST THING ON MY BLOG

I GOT ASKED OUT FOR THE FIRST TIME AFTER I REBLOGGED IT

cuappatea-deactivated20200216

wait but whats happening with the bagel tho

toca144

Giv news

maiskinny

This bagel better do me and my skinnies some wonders.

st0nedsk1nnygrl

im passed my drivers test🙏🏽

sof-ty

I Only think in that my parnerts don’t know about my ed xd.

theropegeek-deactivated20170722

babienawtie

again….

lisa-i-am

This was totally awesome @cbbears70s and so very true. Gosh if you guys could see some of the messages I get. Especially dick pics or fantasies as an introduction. Thank you for sharing this with me. It is awesome!!

loverofwomensticklishfeet

I’m loverofwomensticklishfeet, and I approve this message.

shadydreammakerbandit

I approve too

theropegeek-deactivated20170722

babienawtie

again….

lisa-i-am

This was totally awesome @cbbears70s and so very true. Gosh if you guys could see some of the messages I get. Especially dick pics or fantasies as an introduction. Thank you for sharing this with me. It is awesome!!

loverofwomensticklishfeet

I’m loverofwomensticklishfeet, and I approve this message.

shadydreammakerbandit

I approve too

campyvillain

hi! i’m a butch lesbian with a mullet, im 5”9, reddish blonde hair (it was black last month lol), super pale, and i wear wayfarer glasses. i really like engineering and racing and i just got my degree a few weeks ago! my partner and i are going to open a restaurant 3 months from now and i’m so excited! :)

AWH THATS SO SWEET 🥺 TELL UR PARTNER I SAY HI I WISH U TWO THE BEST

campyvillain

DID I JUST FALL FOR THE FELIX KRANKEN VERSION OF THE PRINCESS PEACH ASK

fatb1tchhhhh

Veggie frittata! (165 cals)

This is SO SO good! It’s super tasty and really filling! You can make so many varieties and add different fillings but this is definitely my fav so far.

Ingredients

8 eggs (592)

100 ml almond milk (13)

80 g zucchini (13,5)

56 g mini tomatoes (10)

30 g bell pepper (8)

1 tsp black pepper (3)

1 tsp salt (0)

1/2 tsp oil for frying (20)

How to

Mix together the eggs, almond milk, salt and black pepper

Slice the zucchini REALLY thin

Chop the bell pepper

Mix the zucchini and bell pepper with the egg mixture

Put your oil in a pan (I’m usually NEVER using oil but this get stuck in the pan really easy) then pour your egg and veggiemix in it

Put your tomatoes in the edges of the pan

Fry til the bottom is set and then put it in the oven at 175 degrees until it’s all cooked through

Voilà! Enjoy!

Calories per portion (1/4 of the frittata) -165 Total calories -659,5

Remember that the calories can vary a bit depending on what products etc you use.

Feel free to ask if there’s something you don’t understand about the recipe! Have a nice day <3

weightlqss

90 calorie noodle soup

Hello everybody! It was raining hard today and I wanted to make something warm and low-cal that would fill me up. It ended up having a very peppery taste, similar to some of my favorite instant beef broths. Without the soup this recipe is only 46 calories!!

Ingredients:

200g shirataki noodles (10)

3 tablespoons green onion (8)

2 cloves garlic (8)

3 tablespoons soy sauce (30)

3/4 cup water (0)

1 large egg white (17)

black pepper to taste (0-17)

total: 90 calories

Directions:

Noodles

1. Prep. Wash your noodles thoroughly under running water. Chop your garlic and green onions.

2. Pan fry noodles on a non-stick pan until the smell of konjac disappears when you bite into them. They should also lose a bit of their iconic bounce (but only slightly).

3. Add chopped garlic, green onions, and a couple tablespoons of soy sauce to noodles. Also sprinkle a generous amount of black pepper. Stir fry them until noodles are evenly coated.

Soup

1. Remove noodles from pan and place in a bowl. Leave a bit of garlic in the pan.

2. Add 3/4 cups of water, 1 tablespoon soy sauce, and more black pepper to pan. Mix thoroughly.

3. Separate your egg yolk from your whites and drop the white into the broth. Stir until fully cooked. If you have dogs, you can fry the yolk afterwards and give it to them as a treat.

4. Pour your soup over your noodles. Add more green onion as garnishing if desired. Eat and enjoy!

Notes:

+Warm and filling! Good for rainy days

+Egg whites have lots of protein

+Satisfies salty/peppery cravings

You can try using a regular pan, I’m just not sure if you’ll need oil to keep the noodles from sticking