Idontevenknowanymore

2something bi with a rbf

[foolfortune]

current mantra

[augvian56]

i think there’s actually nothing better than being randomly told “I love you” after doing something characteristically stupid. Like what do you mean I’m a lovable person and I just did something silly and you thought “of course you would do that. I love you.”. No better feeling

[gnossienne]

King Lear performed in the fire-damaged ruins of Teatro Municipal de Lima (c. 1999), conceived by architect Luis de Longhi

[slavicafire]

in this new year I want you to be alright. I hope you move out. I hope you have enough money to feel safe. I hope you abandon shame and forgive yourself. I hope you get enough sleep and some good news. I hope you laugh a lot and the heaviness of the world eases a bit. I wish you to be alright.

[only-tiktoks]

[skovenshemmeligheder]

Like an old man to a construction site

[stripedteacup]

[shinelessstar]

Kiero

[owlservice]

I really do feel some days that my university is trying to get me to kill myself. But I know they aren't capable of that level of interdepartmental coordination.

[vampiremuney]

Here’s the links for the official streams coming from Corona Capital tonight btw

Twitch

YouTube

Facebook

TikTok

[lindamarieansonsnaps]

[polskiebagno]

[theactualffuck]

slut era

[literaphobe]

UH WHAT

UH...... WHAT.........

[eirenical]

This entire article is eye-opening, even as someone who has ADHD and has read a lot about it already. There's so much more there than just the bit about the glucose-craving brain. SO. MUCH.

This might have been the bit that hit me hardest, actually:

it would be easy to misinterpret the following scenario as a standoff between two partners: Imagine that your partner asks you to pay the electric bill, and you say to yourself, “OK, I have time to do that today.” But when you sit down to do it, you keep getting distracted. The ADHD brain needs higher stimulation in order to complete this rote task with minimal payoff. Your ADHD brain says, “That task is way too boring, and I refuse to focus on it. Find something that interests me more, which offers me a bigger dopamine reward, and I’ll work with you.” It doesn’t matter that you know you should pay the bill as promised; if your brain won’t engage, it’s an ugly standoff. Perhaps, after a day of procrastination — when your partner will be home in 20 minutes and the bill is still unpaid — there may be enough of an adrenaline rush from a sense of crisis that your brain will engage and you pay the bill.

The ADHD brain and its owner are at odds with one another. It’s difficult to compel a disengaged brain to engage by force of will. In fact, much of the treatment for ADHD involves learning to psych out the brain, so that it will attend to necessary, low-stimulation tasks.

Appreciating the tug-of-war within that pits intellect against neurobiology increases compassion and acceptance for one’s hidden struggle.

I feel SEEN. OTZ

Seriously, though. Read the whole thing. It's a good one.

[blackwoolncrown]

Add to this that it's not just that your brain says "I don't want to"- the prefrontal cortex literally shuts OFF.

[sweetfirebird]

I just read something about some fanfic readers on TikTok, mostly younger ones, are against AO3 because it doesn't recommend fic to them. As in, it doesn't track them and auto-feed them content using an algorithm.

I am sure it's not every younger fanfiction-reading nerd. But....

The generational divide between old internet and new internet users is so stark sometimes. Like. That younger people don't remember the individual fanfiction websites days... okay. I get that. Some of them weren't even born and time is time and it moves on. It's fine.

But to grow up with an internet where you do not get a choice, or not much of a choice, except to be fed content? Oh wow that's a yikes I've never thought about before.

Yeah, there's some filter capabilities but companies override that all the time with subtle little changes. Youtube recommends stuff constantly (often conservative videos even to me who has no history of watching or liking that shit). Twitter and Facebook got rid of chronological posts and even when you try to get rid of suggested posts, they come back. Instagram is basically all ads now. And then TikTok literally doesn't even ask you to search (and as I recall, their search function sucks), and you can like videos to change what you see *a little* but ultimately the algorithm will lead you wherever it wants.

That's so sad to grow up with that. Choice and searching and relying on your judgment and the recommendations of people you like... those are good things.

I am not like "oh those youths!" here. I am "fuck these corporations!" here. Look at this shit. It's not a rec list from someone you like and trust--it's what corporate has decided you should like. And a lot of these kids have not known anything else. That's scary and infuriating.

[fangirltothefullest]

Yes and one of the problems with being autofed content is that the people owning the algorithm will deliberately and nefarious feed you the negative, bad, harmful and toxic rhetorics while disguising them. Just looking at random shorts on YouTube is fine until you're 12 videos in and suddenly being exposed to conservative toxic ideologies disguised as the truth and worded in a convincing way. You might never be interested in watching a video of a woman saying that gender is binary but there she is subtly talking about those "awful" people who "make a big deal" out of everything and we should just "chill out and let people have their opinions."

It's disguised on purpose. It's worded in a way to make you agree. Oh yes surely those people are overreacting. Clearly the binary is the only logical way right?

They do this on purpose they do this maliciously and being autofed means you don't get a choice in what you'd like to eat.

And you might think "one video isnt going to harm me", but like I said the algorithm is designed to start slow and get worse. The auto feed short videos I saw started out somewhat logically- it took me, a grown adult, a few seconds to realize oh shit this videos message doesn't actually align with my values.

And after a few more shorts in a row another one showed up and it was slightly worse than the first one. I don't watch short videos often because of it.

And I see younger generations getting mad at me when I say stuff like that- but we aren't judging you we're worried for you. We want you to be informed and aware of what the big companies are trying to force-feed you becsuse they're the ones who make the ads and the algorithms. And you have to ask why am I being autofed these videos or posts and what purpose does it serve the companies to do so?

Places like AO3 where you can actively choose what you want and literally cater your search to your every desire is astonishing.

You can find the most niche fics for characters and plots you have been craving.

And to be fair it does autofeed you. Your only step is to choose a character and it will feed you EVERY fic with that character. You could go down the entire list.

Just please please please be careful online.

[shinelessstar]

yogurt is really the ultimate food

i had a pot of sealed greek yogurt, apparently past it's expiration date, still oppened and tried it and it was fine??

either fermented milk is eternal or expiration dates are a lie

[witchesversuspatriarchy]

Just a meme because the capitalism of the neoliberal order is killing us all.

[enigmasandepiphanies]

vulnerability is like so hard, if I told you anything sappy please know that I had a hand to hand combat with seven layers of embarrassment and repression

[boethiah]

no such thing as wasting your 20s your 20s are for recovering from whatever the fuck happened to you as a kid so that youre ready to get weird with it in your 30s

[ispyspookymansion]

i love you cloudy skies i love you 60F/16C temperatures i love you cool winds i love you dewy grass i love you lake and oceanfront breezes i love you rain i love you light jacket weather i love you springtime i love you late fall i love you middle ground temperatures forever

[bertharussellgf]

it’s the price we pay for being sexy as fuck