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YOU ARE THE REASON
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@silverlily35
I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF
This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.
Reblogging because it’s a damn potato and I want to encourage people to assume potatoes are magical.
the last time i reblogged this my disability claim got approved nahdhddbbdb
Come on potato!
the fact that during the entirety of the devil wears prada Andy’s friends and boyfriend Nate were completely shitting on her newfound devotion to her job including scoffing at her effort to show that she actually learned to respect the fashion industry while also using it as a stepping stone for her own writing career just for it to end with Nate getting a sou-chef position in boston and immediately knowing that Andy would pack up her entire life to move with him to boston just to accommodate HIS dream………electric chair
I feel like I’m seeing Nate apologists popping up a lot lately and I am like HELL NO that man was trash
"Hello, sweetheart."
☆ - ̗̀✨ He's just Ken ✨ ̖́- ☆
TFW when you’re watching Lion King 2 and you realise this is the origin of your thing for redeemable villains
Ben Solo Celebration (Appreciation🙂)III
When you realize the Force Skype is about to kick off and you have 3 seconds to prepare for your Dyad.
Kens? I think you mean… RENS
Things you don’t need to feel guilty about: eating, how you look, standing up for yourself, relaxing, sleeping in, taking a mental health day, saying “no.”
do kids these days know about glomping?
What is that?
hehe…. *glomps you* OwO
:3
What the fuck?
The world is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost; for none now live who remember it.
I had completely forgotten this but the second I got to “*glomps you* OwO” I was 15 again
My sweet angel ugh 😍😍😍😍💖💖💖💖💖
that is the face of a man worried he will be next
Good news, he was not next! In fact, she accepted him as her mate, he learned the crane mating dance and now every year, he artificially inseminates her with crane semen to expand the very endangered crane population. True story.
Sorry, he WHAT? Imagine being this man's boss and having to sit him down like. Listen. Brian. We need you to fuck the bird. You have to act like you're excited about it.
crane husband.....
this is the diametric opposite of all those awful swan wife stories and i love it.
(WalWaPo makes you jump through like three separate hoops before you can read the article, so I will share some of the highlights:
Walnut was born in a species-recovery breeding program in the 1980′s. The program had crane chicks hand-raised by human volunteers, and at that time they did not fully understand the measures necessary make sure that the chicks do not imprint on humans and retain their identity as cranes.
As a result, her keepers believe, Walnut does not recognize other cranes as members of her own species.
It has not been proven that Walnut killed her previous suitors; however, there is a persistent rumor in the white-naped-crane-conservation community that she did.
Because this species is highly endangered, and the gene pool of the captive population is small, it’s pretty important for the survival of her species that Walnut A) mate, and B) not kill a bunch of other cranes.
The actual name of the keeper is Chris Crowe.
They both arrived at the Smithsonian Conservation Biology Institute in 2004.
Walnut immediately began paying special attention to Chris--and ignoring the eligible male crane in a nearby enclosure.
Walnut initiated their courtship, performing the opening moves of a mating dance.
Chris realized that if he reciprocated the mating dance, it might be possible to artificially inseminate Walnut with her participation and consent. (The process normally involves restraining the bird.)
It worked!
Chris and Walnut have had five children, who were raised by other crane couples at the facility--sometimes the biological dad and his mate--both because it’s unclear whether Walnut would accept the chicks as her own, and because Chris is not equipped to be a Crane Dad.
However, the Institute provides her with artificial eggs to sit on, and Chris takes his turn looking after them. (This would not work with real eggs because he can’t sit on them properly, but Walnut seems to feel that he is on the job if he just stands over them.)
Chris accepts that he is pretty much married to this bird. White-naped cranes live to be about 60, and they mate for life, so he knows he can’t retire while Walnut is alive. (At the time of the article, Walnut was 36, and Chris 42.)
Legit cannot pick the funniest part of this
she has not been PROVEN to have killed her exes, but there is a PERSISTENT RUMOR (really officers she's simply DEVASTATED, she sobs, wearing a new feather boa unfortunately resembling her most recent deceased husband)
His name is Chris CROWE. (Mrs. Walnut Crane-Crowe?)
the mental images of a whole human man learning and performing the crane mating dance, and "sitting" on artificial eggs so she thinks he's performing his duties as a husband and father (and apparently OBJECTS if he does not?)
"chris, buddy, you gotta marry the possibly-murderous crane lady for the GOOD OF THE SPECIES." (alternately: "chris, my man! good news! we found you a very interested lady! She's 36, she's very spirited and independent, she holds a very important and rare status in her society! ...Is there a downside? WELL...")
chris sits any potential human partners down, like "my love, you must understand before we wed,,, i am already... Attached" (camera drifts wistfully to the above photo) "Lady Walnut and I have an,, Understanding... the relationship is open, but very committed"
just had to explain this post to my father bc he thought my stifled laughter was a signal of illness.
well done, everyone, good game. hit the showers.
Not only is he 'married' to walnut, this has apparently happened SEVERAL times, so he has MULTIPLE crane wives, none of which know about any of his other crane wives. This man is, for some unknown reason, irresistible to cranes
the “this content has been removed for violating Tumblr’s Community Guidelines” notice really adds a lot of flavor to this post and somehow makes it MORE obscene than whatever that actually was
I am so glad this chain exists
All of this PLUS many women stayed in abusive horrible relationships becuase the Church is a patriarchal cheerleader for abusive men.
My grandmother did leave my grandfather in the 1960s and faced all of this alone with three kids and no child support. I admire her immensely.
pumpkin spice candles soon
pumpkin lattes soon
pumpkin everything
#ITS STILL JULY YOU ANIMALS
The only good thing about getting old and time speeding up is that I can already smell the cinnamon and dry leaves of fall
Sitting in this horrible UK heat wave imagining fall 🍁☕️
I actually liked Solo. I thought the story was great and I like Alden’s portrayal of a young Han Solo. So I’m rather annoyed with KK and DLF for saying it was a “mistake” to recast him and dismissing his contribution to the franchise.
I loved Solo! After The Last Jedi, it’s my second favorite film of the Disney Star Wars era (and I came into it with zero expectations). I don’t understand all the hate it gets.
I can't wait to see Colin go from "I would never dream of courting Penelope Featherington" to "I. Miss. My. Wife."
