hella bubbles

Will personally punch antivaxxers, nazis, rapists, and Martin Shkreli in the face

[abbf26]

someone teach me how to draw bears

[gembubbles]

Like this

[abbf26]

i am a gay man unfortunately. this is still very sweet

[lamp-intheheadlights-deactivate]

this technique will work regardless of sexuality, don’t worry

[purplerupees]

Mario and Sonic at the Sochi 2014 Olympic Winter Games is such a great game. It lets me live out my wildest fantasy.

[ichikun]

born to make history

[babyanimalgifs]

One dog has ear medicine she needs and the other one also thinks he needs it too 

(Source)

[bundibird]

Oh my gosh, mine does this EXACT SAME THING.

The cocker spaniel is prone to ear infections, so she needs a solution squirted down her ear canal and massaged in on a regular basis. She absolutely HATES it, but she endures it because she’s a good girl and she knows she gets treats after.

The border collie does NOT have ear issues, and doesn’t need the solution, but every time I’ve finished doing the cocker spaniel’s ears, he comes slinking up to me with his tail between his legs and an expression like “It is my turn for the ear torture. 😔😔 do your worst. 😔😔😔” and he will KEEP ACTING LIKE THAT until I put the closed nozzle of the ear solution into his ear and tip it upside down and massage his ear for a bit. Then I tell him he’s done and he immediately turns delighted, because “oh, wow, I survived the ear torture, and now I’m just vibrating with delight at my survival, wow, that was rough, but I made it through”

At literally no stage did we ever tell him he needed his ears done. He just saw the cocker spaniel getting it done, and was like, “oh. 😔 ear medicine for all of us 😔”

[jacobtheloofah]

[chaofruity]

hey everyone try this

Shut up

[1-800-fuckyou]

[chaofruity]

[1-800-fuckyou]

[petal-metal-blog]

OMG MY NEW SHOES CAME :3 ignore my ugly house arrest ankle bracelet. haha

[knuckleduster]

fuck everything else this is the real post of the decade

[unpretty]

The Outbursts of Everett True was a comic strip that ran in papers from 1905 to 1927, wherein the aforementioned Everett True regularly beat the everliving shit out of rude people as a warning to anyone else who might consider being rude. Men have not only been taking up too much room on public transport for about as long as public transport has existed, but the people around them have been irritated about it for at least a hundred years. The next time someone tries to claim that manspreading is a false phenomenon, please direct them to this strip so that Everett True can correct their misconceptions with an umbrella upside the head.

[guyalice]

I have never before heard of Everett True, but if he “regularly beat the everliving shit out of rude people as a warning to anyone else who might consider being rude,” I have a strong spiritual connection with him.

[froginakettle]

[hotcocoachia]

I fucking love him

[jaynavajasso]

i can imagine this guy’s voice very clearly in my head but i couldn’t put a name to it 

[shitty-car-mods-daily]

Yep

[noblewing-deactivated20200601]

People feel threatened by this.

Keep that in mind.

[sexhaver]

literally every single time without fail

[noblewing-deactivated20200601]

Get a load of you, making fun of someone’s profile pic in 2019. You must be so proud. I bet you get all the ladies.

Fuck off.

[sexhaver]

i am and i do, ponyfucker

[guu]

this is what you can find when you click on his FIMfiction link on his blog

Bidoofs Law, at it again

[noblewing-deactivated20200601]

Oh God. They’re multiplying.

Yeah, I’m totally the degenerate here. My opinion doesn’t fucking matter because I like to fuck horses and watch a show for little kids.

Ugh… are you guys done? You’re boring me.

[guu]

[ancientson]

*gets into an accident and dies because I put bumper stickers all over my windows to own the libs and now I can’t see*

*horsefucker3000 is the only person to attend my funeral*

[racybiscuit]

[love-sck-deactivated20200202]

[biaesthetc]

ways bisexuals communicate

finger guns

thumbs up

peace signs

salutes

“y’all”

[mytrainss-moved]

I feel… ATTACKED

[katthefool]

I’m gonna stab u op I didn’t asked to be called out

[fallen-gravity]

why are y’all so mean :( 

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

i can’t stop thinking about that post about spiderman having a patreon. would he have benefit tiers? $1 guarantees weekly videos of him doing backflips somewhere Very Up High. Monthly goal is his rent with a promise like “if i have the bare minimum a human being needs to survive i guess I can keep fighting crime which is cool. mutually beneficially.” rumor has it that once someone sent him $1000 directly on ko-fi and he showed up at a birthday party but who knows.

$1 Access to Spiderman’s snapchat.

[heydocverdant]

Spider-Man seems like the kinda guy to show up to a kid’s birthday party solely to surprise children and eat cake, so whoever allegedly paid $1000 to do what he probably was already planning to do is either very kind or a fool

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

oh no he crashes children’s birthday parties all the time and gets party favor baggies. this was a 21st birthday party which was very stressful bc he kept stumbling over trying to politely refuse drinks bc he’s a good kid but while also not revealing he’s legally too young to drink

[heydocverdant]

Even better: just… a montage of Spidey’s excuses for why he can’t drink

“Sorry guys, can’t drink and swing”

“I’m, uh, the designated web-slinger!”

“I actually just finished consuming the liquified remains of a few carjackers, so I’m good thanks”

“…i can’t risk it harming my eggsac?”

“…no mouth”

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

NO MOUTH

[lizord-lord]

this is exactly the kind of “very pure but also very stressed” peter we all know and love

[tealesbian]

gay people: wave and fly the rainbow flag during pride month

cishets: UMMMMMM wHeReS tHe StRaIgHt PrIdE fLaG???????????

me, a lesbian, here to bring you hets some good news: here’s your flag!

[tealesbian]

i forgot that heterosexuals have not one but TWO pride flags! here’s the second:

[slysfreespeechspace]

What you are doing here is exactly what you don’t want done to you: stereotyping people based on their sexual orientation. Way to be just like the people you hate. Congratulations, you too can be a bigot and an asshole.

[contagiousiridescence]

someone’s not having a good kia summer sales event

[exceptionalcelestial]

oftentimes when you look back on media you enjoyed as a child it's like hello why did they let a 14 year old fight a dragon? but star wars holds up. luke is 19. his reaction to losing his whole family is to say "alright, let's do this. I'm gonna learn to meditate and hire a sexy drug dealer and his friend who's a furry to be my uber across the galaxy so I can blow up a fascist government" that's something only a 19 y/o would do

[catchymemes]

[strawberry-crocodile]

Zillenial things

Being young enough for Minecraft but too old for Fortnite

Being alive for 9/11 but not remembering it at all cuz you were like 2

Seeing reruns of 90s shows when you were really little but being to young to really remember them

Feeling betrayed by Butch Hartman

Listening to the bops of ~2009-2012 in middle school gym class

Growing up through the transition from clunky PCs for nerds and flip phones to smartphones and sleek and easy laptops

Pictochat

Being called a millenial by baby boomers and Gen Z by millenials

[emeraldmercury]

1994-2002 generation put your hands up

[unfortunately-awake]

[kaarchin]

When you start opening up to people

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

when you go to therapy

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

We all deserve to go to a masquerade ball. I deserve to be anonymous among to aristocracy for one night getting up to general debauchery in a swan-inspired mask that absolutely doesn’t hide my face well enough for me to be half as bold and sensual as I plan to act but everyone else is on board so it’s okay and we’ll all just not talk about it tomorrow.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

ppl keep sending me asks about this like “what’s stopping you from throwing a ball OP”

[shiny-propaganda]

Part of me WANTED to suggest we all donate and pitch in for it and do it. But I think (at least I hope) we learned from the last time (then again probably not since they tried again).

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

a masquerade ball, an event that specifically exists to allow people to lower their inhibitions and act out with less social consequences than they would usually have to deal with, populated entirely by people from tumblr is, and don’t get me wrong, the Worst thing I can Ever imagine

[parkchanwoohoo]

Dashquerade

[thepresidentisnude]

Masquerade Ball Pit

[somarysueme]

The Pit Ball