cosmic pollen @oneheadedcerberus - Tumblr Blog

velvetys

Everything used to be 20 dollars and now that I finally have 20 dollars everything is now 200 dollars

februarytrash

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Hey, what’s Winnie the pooh’s favorite color?

taco-bout-a-shit-blog

Yellow

never-kill-on-the-first-dat-blog

No it’s red because of his shirt

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No, it’s yellow because he loves honey

never-kill-on-the-first-dat-blog

You have no idea what you’re talking about

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DID I FUCKING STUTTER?

voaga

Things heating up at the Winnie the Pooh fandom

orcboxer

I have just combined all rice in the world into a single rouse

sneebertdeebert

Sneebert Deebert

orcboxer

snurtsnurt

Putting this here real quick cuz I thought it was so funny. Rodimus never fails to delight

hydrattan

I was feeling agitated and artblocked yesterday so I decided to give my brain a rest by watching TV and then the next thing I knew these were in front of me

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phineas and ferb heritage post

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guoccarmole

feels her aura

beholdingslut

in absolute tears about the pride module at my work

dikdikpronouncedxylophone

bigfoots-biggest-fan

HOLY SHIT GUYS, I WAS INSPIRED BY THIS POST TO TRY MAKE THE SONG AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT WHEN I DRAGGED THE TRAINING AUDIO OVER THE BACKING TRACK AND IT LINED UP PERFECTLY

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Tempted to actually put this on spotify so I can secretly stream it at work...

Tagging @batshit-auspol because as an Australian you're the only big account I know who might share (sorry).

punkrorschach

happy first day of pride everyone

crplpunkklavier

i think about this one so fucking often i had to clip it

6qubed

that was like watching someone very skillfully assembling a stained-glass window just to watch someone else dropkick it

wizardarchetypes

it’s sooo funny when rude customers encounter employees who can deny them service for the first time.

i was working at a little cafe where I could deny service over bad behavior, harassment etc. & mask mandates had just ended a week before & already people were being weird about me still wearing mine—an N95, the kind shaped kinda like a duckbill.

so this man walked in, looked at me sooo scathingly, laughed at me, and said “damn. never known a woman to choose…practicality over looks.”

And I just said, “oh. you can go, you’re not getting a drink.” And he said, “what???”

I said, “sir, you just walked in at 6 am & called women impractical and me ugly in one sentence.”

And he was so astonished he didn’t even argue he just turned around and left 💀🙏🏻 it was like he suddenly became self aware

carolinalaurel

One summer I was running ferry rides across a lake so people could see the waterfalls without walking 6 miles when a guy snapped my bra strap as he was boarding the boat. So i immediately threw him off, he started yelling for my manager, my boss cheerfully informed him that, yeah, she’s the captain of the boat and she can kick off anyone she wants. He goes to storm off, looks expectantly at his girlfriend, and she just goes, “Well, I’M not walking six miles, Michael! I’ll meet you back at the car!” and sits right back down!!!!

The expression on his face when he was told that he couldn’t get on the boat, then immediately told that his girlfriend was ditching him? PRICELESS. he just blinked at her and then stormed off like a child. I gave her a free hat and was like maybe rethink this relationship…….

hickeywiththegoodhair

i once had this fucker come up to order a beer. while i pour it he shows me the wanky fucking chemical structure tattoo on his arm and he’s like “hey. you know what this is” i was like “nah sorry” (never cared abt chemistry in school, plus having to look at a some rando’s pretentious tattoo gives me the douche chills). he decides to respond with “heh. you must not read many books”

i immediately stop pouring his beer. i reply: “heh. you must not want this beer.” thirsty boy immediately starts groveling like a worm “please please no i do want the beer im sorry im sorry” believe me when i say it was one of the most pathetic things ive ever witnessed

lezbadeez

gotta love people immediately backpedaling when they realise that there are Consequences To Being Mean

lastvalyrian

I genuinely believe that part of why it has become so normalized to be openly callous and evil in politics is that customer service culture has trained affluent people that they can treat everyone they consider beneath them however they want and still be treated kindly.