used to be artycharliewrites

Charlie | Abigail | Natasha | Jordan | Hoax | Taako

[six-shit-posts-one-body-blog]

Hmm, turns out missing mood stabilizers for a few weeks is a bad idea.  Who knew? 

[anxietyproblem]

[anxietyproblem]

[championoftheravenqueen]

I just realize that the Underdark in D&D is basically Australia. It’s full of deadly monsters and people were banished there as a punishment and now they justs live there.

[championoftheravenqueen]

HOLY SHIT IT’S DOWN UNDER! how the fuck did I miss that

[trustmeimageographer]

All Drow now must have Aussie accents

[whitepeopletwitter]

[lorem64]

I’m so confused why he would think cookie dough would give him salmonella??? What parent told him this. There’s no chicken in there!

[ankaa-avarshina]

Two words: Raw eggs.

[lorem64]

?? What kind of world do you live in where Raw eggs carry salmonella or are in anyway unsafe

[ankaa-avarshina]

Don’t ask me, ask them Americans. I’m an Asian just passing the word on

[phantoms-lair]

*deep breath* Though the risk is small, raw eggs can carry samonella.

MORE THREATENINGLY Raw wheat can carry E. Coli. However, if you don’t mind making your own cookie dough, you can easily make it safely.

Take your standard recipe. Omit the eggs. Eggs serve as a binding agent to hold the cookie together. Since we’re eating the dough raw, that’s not needed. Take the flour, put it in a pan and bake it at 350 for 7 minutes. Any E. Coli is now dead.

Just mix the rest of the ingredients together as the recipe is called for and BAM, perfectly safe edible cookie dough.

[crayyola-deactivated20220827]

Thank u so fucking much for this wisdom

[antique-scarecrow]

wait you’re telling my i can get E, Coli just FROM EATING FLOUR straight from the bag???

[kingantlion-deactivated20231130]

Why..why are you eating flour straight from the bag?

[meanplastic]

i’m losing my mind

[meanplastic]

[bootycap]

ao3 mcu a:aou abo bdsm ot3 hs au pwp

[bootycap]

the fact that this is completely understandable and rather descriptive makes me rethink what i’ve done with my life

[prewars-deleted]

#i understand it perfectly but you couldn’t fucking pay me to read it

[parakeet]

the human life is a strained and tense one. i envy the life of a smooth rock resting on the beach… warmed by the sun… unaware of the trials and tribulations of sentient life… 

[badoptics]

do you need to talk

[parakeet]

i wish i was a croissant 

[fullpraxisnow]

“[I]t is actually more expensive to be poor than not poor. If you can’t afford the first month’s rent and security deposit you need in order to rent an apartment, you may get stuck in an overpriced residential motel. If you don’t have a kitchen or even a refrigerator and microwave, you will find yourself falling back on convenience store food, which — in addition to its nutritional deficits — is also alarmingly overpriced. If you need a loan, as most poor people eventually do, you will end up paying an interest rate many times more than what a more affluent borrower would be charged. To be poor — especially with children to support and care for — is a perpetual high-wire act.”

— It Is Expensive to Be Poor | The Atlantic

[bae-in-maine]

“Poverty charges interest ” holy hell. Ive never read$heard someone put it that way before. But its so friggen true.

[sirfrogsworth]

Death Kitty: I’ll Do It Later

I thought for Halloween I would post my old “Death Kitty” comics that Chris and I did. Cats are still cats even when they’re dead. 

[fuckyeahasexual]

Book : This character is asexual !

Me : *Opens book* 

Book : And their asexuality is “fixed” when they find their one true love™

Me : *Closes book*

[housecatincarnate]

[musicalmelody22]

Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it” 

Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect. 

[fororchestra]

To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha.

On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious.

[corruptbucky]

I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair…

[justtkeepcalmm-deactivated20250]

Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.

The lengths we go for music.

[lady-gorthaur]

Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.

[elsajeni]

One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.”

And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:

[stifled giggling]

[reeeeeeally deep breath]

[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]

The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.

In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.”

FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.

[minguskingus]

This is the best band post 

Everyone else go home

[oxboold-deactivated20180729]

Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this

which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,

that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that

[prokopetz]

Who does that?

This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.

[vivelafat]

Julius IdontgivaFucik

[septemberbells]

More like Julius Fuckit

[sushinfood]

Pyrozod’s tags for this were too hilarious not to share

[haha-leigh]

I haven’t been in band for years but this made me laugh so hard

[hisroyalnerd]

I haven’t seen this post in ages and I’m dying of laughter

[tobinlaughing]

I didn’t think it could get better after The Foghorn Tuba Story, but it did. It got better. Bless you, MusicTumblr.

[six-shit-posts-one-body-blog]

An actual segment of an essay title I'm going to submit to an actual human being

Comparing Apples to The Oranges

I'm blame my gf for this entirely. They're a walking shit post

[six-shit-posts-one-body-blog]

Honestly the suggested posts that show up in my Tumblr feed are a fckn wild time.

[tastefullyoffensive]

Purrito supreme

[dudepositivity]

you are allowed to eat. even if its a snack! even if its chocolate or fried food or a milkshake! man you can eat and you can let yourself enjoy it, you’re allowed to.