I'm your toy, your 19th Century Boy

Immature literary shitposts. Sideblog.

[vestatilleys]

Vesta Tilley, c.1900′s.

[memejacker-deactivated20150111]

caligula had anime eyes

[ainda4441-deactivated20230101]

wait romans painted their marble sculptures

it looks like a cheap theme park ride mascot

[memejacker-deactivated20150111]

yep

here’s a statue of Augustus

and here’s a reproduction of the statue with the colors restored 

[misterqueasy-blog]

i honestly think that what we consider the height of sculpture in all of Western civilization being essentially the leftover templates of gaudy pieces of theme park shit to be evidence of the potential merit of found art

[space-gynecologist-deactivated2]

“I tried coloring it and then I ruined it”

[prokopetz]

And you know what the funniest part is? The paint didn’t just wear off over time. A bunch of asshole British historians back in the Victorian era actually went around scrubbing the remaining paint off of Greek and Roman statues - often destroying the fine details of the carving in the process - because the bright colours didn’t fit the dignified image they wished to present of the the cultures they claimed to be heirs to. This process also removed visible evidence of the fact that at least some of the statues thus stripped of paint had originally depicted non-white individuals.

Whenever you look at a Roman statue with a bare marble face, you’re looking at the face of imperialist historical revisionism.

(The missing noses on a lot of Egyptian statues are a similar deal. It’s not that the ancient Egyptians made statues with strangely fragile noses. Many Victorian archaeologists had a habit of chipping the noses off of the statues they brought back, then claiming that they’d found them that way - because with the noses intact, it was too obvious that the statues were meant to depict individuals of black African descent.)

[stankyleg-deactivated2918973]

Sorry, I keep reblogging this over and over, the last comment is unbelievable. Wow.

[themarysue]

WUT

[ten-and-donna]

Knowledge bomb!

[thescienceofjohnlock]

Many more fig leaves in strategic places appeared thanks to the Victorians too.

[ichigomashi]

the vatican has a drawer of dicks that were taken off of statues

[haiku-robot]

the vatican has a drawer of dicks that were taken off of statues

^Haiku^bot^0.5. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes. | Who do I read? | Contact | Beep-boop!

[pyrlspite]

[dudeholdmybeer-deactivated20180]

me trying on new outfits in my room

[exit-ariel-deactivated20170607]

Fun Fact: Apparently Oscar Wilde was 6’3”, which in the 1870s would have been the equivalent of like 6’7”-6’9” tall. He was so ridiculously huge and awkward that one of his friends described him as looking like a “great white caterpillar.” That is all.

[theflowofink]

When his lover’s father ( one of the founding father’s of boxing as a sport) showed up to kick his ass, Oscar stood up, pulled a gun and said something like  “I don’t know what the Queensberry rules are, but the Oscar Wilde rule is to shoot on sight.” 

[out-there-on-the-maroon]

The more I find out about Oscar Wilde the more delighted I am.

[flarebossmalva]

i’m pretty sure ulysses was written as a fuck you to the english language itself and, like, i definitely respect that, but also don’t make me read it

[two-are-the-trees]

So I’m re reading Picture of Dorian Gray

[malvoliowithin]

Reasons Richard II is a relatable character:

Just wants to be loved

Problematic™

Gay 

Cries a lot

Likes being fancy and having things

Self-perception goes from ‘I’m the most beautiful ever’ to ‘I am Dirt’ and back again

Reasons Henry IV is a relatable character:

Lingering sense of dread

“It seemed like a good idea at the time”

Wants the best for everyone

Competent but ultimately dismayed

Reasons Henry V is a relatable character:

Avoids responsibilities 

Uncomfortable family life

Just wants to go out and party with his friends is that too much to ask

Pretends he absolutely 100% knows what he’s doing

Doesn’t

Reasons Henry VI is a relatable character:

Bad at everything

Sad

Wants everyone to be happy (isn’t happy)

Does nothing wrong

Does nothing right either

Didn’t ask for any of this

Reasons Richard III is a relatable character:

Monologues about how ugly he is and then gets mad when he’s insulted

Doesn’t know how to act normal

Jokes about how awful he is 

Is actually awful

Weird sense of humor

Has lots of Ambition

[snime]

just precisely how bad was 1500s jerusalem at making maps, you ask? well,

[scienceasfuck]

this…is a fidget spinner

[kingdeath000]

Reblog if you believe in fidget spinner earth.

[firstthingsfirth]

Austenland by Shannon Hale

[sharp-switchblade]

[parkersrevenge]

Your advice was good but I have not determined whether I shall follow it, this place is the Devil, or at least his principle residence, they call it the University…

Lord Byron to John Hanson, November 23, 1805

Well if this ain’t the most relatable thing I’ve ever read.

(via parkersrevenge)

[justmeandmylifeee]

He may be arrogant, but then he has a right to be -

El James . . . 109/365 (via justmeandmylifeee)

[periegesisvoid-deactivated]

The Latin word for raisin is “uva passa” which literally means “a grape that has suffered,” and tell me that isn’t the best shit ever

[heathyr]

sometimes ………….. books that are considered classics…………. are worse

[heathyr]

everyone’s tags on this post are enhancing my life force

[slut-for-byron]

My favourite gay moment in hound of the baskervilles (Hit me baby one more time always runs through my mind when I read this)

[slut-for-byron]

[slut-for-byron]