Baby Slut Riker @sluttyquarantinetheory - Tumblr Blog

can't stop thinking about how Remmick had a black eye after fleeing the Choctaw vampire hunters. Forget stakes and holy water and garlic; they were just straight up beating his ass

dumbpuppyfag

UNGRATEFUL tech companies are saying things like "turn off your ad blocker" and "we need your photo id" instead of "thank you so much for not just pirating our shit, youre so handsome"

burgerdotcom

reblogs were off

boophisburnhamae

SOONG: I gave you the ability to choose whatever you wanted. To do whatever you wanted. Why Starfleet?

DATA: It was Starfleet officers who rescued me.

SOONG: Ah. So you decided to emulate your emancipators, huh? How disappointing.

DATA: What choice of vocation would have met with your approval, sir?

SOONG: Well, I often hoped you might become a scientist. Perhaps even a cyberneticist.

Data is both of those things

#Accuratd parent interaction

jayebat

bioluminescent phytoplankton glowing off the southern coast of Australia

parabiota

STOP SCROLLING

Your life ends in the wasteland.

professionalchaoticdumbass

there’s a japanese radish just below this post but you can’t reach it

clonerightsagenda

I think this is just a trend everywhere but I've been very frustrated this week by how much admin work is being outsourced to me as the patient/customer.

My orthodontist tells me I can make an appointment with the surgeon. I call the surgeon. They tell me I need a new referral. I call the orthodontist. They do a referral. I call the surgeon. Referral didn't come through. They tell me about their special unique system we have to use. I call the ortho again and walk them through the referral. I call the surgeon. They say the referral was missing some details so they have to do it again. I call the ortho.

The insurance company calls me about repair shops. I give them the name of the repair shop which I already gave them yesterday. They say they're not in their system but I can use them, but I have to call the repair shop to ask them to contact the insurance company. I call the repair shop and they say the insurance company is supposed to email them.

I feel like at a certain point these constant fetch quests become unreasonable?? Is it too much to expect these groups to communicate with each other instead of making me run back and forth between them???

clonerightsagenda

Made this post and then the new property manager (who started on Monday and only finally emailed us today because I sent a vaguely professionally hostile email to her boss because I hadn't heard anything and was not convinced she existed) asked for a list of open action items which her predecessor should have had but apparently wasn't keeping track of, which I learned when I met her boss and provided her with the list of open action items, which I guess tragically died in a fire in the last 2 weeks since she was sitting at my kitchen table, being menaced by the skull. How many people's jobs am I doing now

hlahlahlahlahly

The phrase arrived in my head so completely formed and concrete that I couldn’t believe it wasn’t already established in the lexicon, but at

clonerightsagenda

It has a name!!!

anarchistmemedistro

neoliberalism: pay for your own exploitation

draconym

Coca Cola flavored Oreos taste like if you could eat clipart

draconym

These taste like an abstract concept. Summer Vacation flavored. Yankee Candle ass cookie.

errant-light

this just keeps being relevant

thelawfulchaotic

This skit absolutely slaps forever but I have to tell you guys the secret.

The weird Oreos don’t sell… but the weird Oreos just being around and visible make people buy more regular Oreos.

That’s why.

draconym

The weird Oreos DO sell, but my housemate is the one buying them all

unfavorableinstigation

I think they add an important element of randomness to the environment. My father in law bought 6 or 7 boxes of the Selena Gomez Oreos so he could set a Selena Gomez Oreo alarm to go off mid workday and then say to his coworkers, "Oh, my Selena Gomez Oreo alarm is going off!" and unearth from his locker his 6 or 7 boxes of Selena Gomez Oreos so he and his coworkers could distribute them around the neonatal ICU ward where they work. He said it livened up an otherwise extremely dreary day.

glitterary

Love that Murderbot canonically learned to hack from the Corporation Rim equivalent of Bill Nye the Science Guy.

derinthescarletpescatarian

I like to imagine it learned from stuff like Hackers and misunderstood it as edutainment because, since MB has basic access codes to a lot of the stuff it hacks and can make friends with and trade media with the rest, the shitty fake hacking actually works so MB assumes that's how it's supposed to be done.

*MB accidentally bypassing the main security with its access codes and mathing its way through the basic Idiot Block* "Yeah this is how penetrating a security system works for everyone. You do some very basic cool math and you're in. I saw it in Movies."

derinthescarletpescatarian

MB is like

derinthescarletpescatarian

#I like to think the shows were more like lockpicking lawyer and MB has most of the keys already#the thing is a walking talking singlesided jiggler

funkyfeefee

The thing about American "leftist" comedians is that they aren't actually leftist, they are the Imperial Court Jesters. They stand on a stage, point directly at the blood-soaked gears of the war machine, make a little tee-hee noise, and the crowd erupts. Not because they are critiquing the machine, but because the laughter is a pressure release valve for the people inside it. Take the video of that stand-up asking the defense contractor if she helped Trump bomb those 160 Iranian school girls, and everyone laughing, including the contractor herself. That laughter is ritual absolution. The contractor laughs because she knows she will never face a tribunal. The audience laughs because they get to feel "self-aware" without having to actually stop anything. The joke doesn't condemn the contractor; it humanizes her, turns her into a lovable scamp who just happens to have a job graphing the velocity of shrapnel through children's bodies. By making it a punchline, the comedian sanitizes the atrocity. The blood is scrubbed off the stage. The audience gets to say "wow, we are so edgy for talking about it" while the person who builds the bombs gets to chuckle and order another drink. It is not satire, it is a team-building exercise for the empire.

Then there is the YouTuber talking about Transformers, casually dropping the "Iraq war aesthetic" like it's a color palette. Desert punk. Military core. A vibe. This is what happens when your country hasn't had a war on its own soil in living memory; the violence becomes media, a backdrop for childhood toys. The explosions are no longer the sound of mothers screaming; they are cool action sequences. They are digesting the visual debris of massacre as a nostalgic fashion choice, scraping the trauma off and compressing it into a genre for their retro-futurist fantasies. The apocalypse becomes a mood board.

And finally, the girl recounting celebrity love triangles from her childhood, flippantly mentioning how the U.S. was "busy with the Iraq war or whatever." Or whatever. That single phrase is the thesis statement of American innocence. Over a million dead, a region destabilized for a century, an endless river of grief; and for her, it was the commercial break between pop culture segments. It didn't raise her rent. It didn't stop her Wi-Fi. The violence is geo-locked to brown skin and distant deserts, just background noise like a refrigerator humming. She has the luxury of forgetting because the machine doesn't eat her children, it eats yours.

Americans don't hate the machine; they love the output. They hate the mess of it. So they turn it into jokes, into aesthetic, into "whatever." Because if they stopped laughing, if they stopped scrolling, if they actually looked at the 4K drone footage of the aftermath instead of the cool explosion CGI in their movies, they would have to realize that the lithium in their phones, the gas in their tanks, and the comfort of their suburban cul-de-sacs are all greased with the fat of foreign children. And they can't handle that. So they laugh. They turn it into a vibe. They call it "the Iraq war or whatever." You can't deconstruct the master's house with the master's jokes, especially when the punchline is the corpses holding up the floorboards.

nyquilnap

this is all thats left of her

importantbusinessdinosaur

Odd comic panels: Kingpin's weird dog and Wolverine's really excitable beers.

vice-s-assistant

Zoom on the crop in the second image doesn't help it at all.

iguanamouth

I really like winnie the pooh, Can you draw winnie the pooh pleaseeeeee

thetyrannosaur

Happy 10 year anniversary to this absolutely foundational post

skiingcows

#really cannot emphasize enough how much iguanamouth changed the site’s sense of humor and therefore the timeline of the western world

quasi-normalcy

So what I think is that there's this default belief in patriarchy that men are superior to women and therefore the "masculine" sphere is superior to the "feminine" sphere. And so, as feminists have fought to expand the number of allowable female activities, men (on the aggregate over generations) have retreated from those activities because they're now seen as "feminine", and so partaking in them is incommensurate with their belief in their own superiority. And, unfortunately, as this has progressed, this has resulted in a lot of men sectioning themselves off from, frankly, everything that actually makes being alive worthwhile. It's a misery spiral, and the only way out is to abandon male supremacy.

quasi-normalcy

#men gave up deep friendships and reading and poetry and colourful fashion#all things that used to be considered manly in the 19th century#they're currently giving up on studying law and medecine#it's so stupid and sad

(I mean, the colourful fashion was more of an eighteenth century thing, but yeah)

quasi-normalcy

#more women in higher education meaning fewer men is incredibly depressing to me. funny in a sad way#what happens when women will finally get into trades? will they just stop working

sherryzade

spectacular tags from @luesmainblog

moonlightvigil8

One thing i would like to add

This is know as man fleeting or something, and it happens with poc moving to white suburbs in usa too, but what i want to talk about is how when woman start to get into something, like orchestra, the value of it decreases and everyones salary gets lower

So, yeah