Baby Slut Riker @sluttyquarantinetheory - Tumblr Blog

stantler

amygdalae

I absolutely adore dogs but I think dog haters are (usually) more justified than cat haters wrt their reasoning

amygdalae

your average cat hater: I don't like how they r bitchy and ignore me/ won't let me manhandle them

your average dog hater: I have been mortally endangered by an ill-trained dog

universeleads

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

universeleads

English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son

overwhelmedfernfrond

I explained the “x before gta6” meme to my immigrant father and he, in turn, explained to me how back in his day in Romania, they had the same type of joke, except instead of it being gta6, it was about the imminent death of a singer named Gică Petrescu, who everyone was continuously shocked by because he refused to die. Every time a momentous event happened people would say, in essence: “This happened and Gică Petrescu hasn’t even died yet?!?”

So. He understood the gta6 meme immediately because they apparently had the same thing in Romania when he was young, except way, way more morbid

leaky-port-nacelle

Thinking about that very first Trill episode in TNG where Dr. Crusher fell in love with a man and then he died and his symbiont was passed to a woman and she was like "anyway Bev, shall we continue" and Beverly stared down the camera to say "I wish my world was ready for that" in a way that definitely meant "I wish I could be gay" but in story technically had to mean "you changing bodies is too confusing for me"

But anyway, at least we know that Beverly's answer to "would you love me if I were a worm" is a politically charged "the studio wouldn't let me"

rotzaprachim

“hallelujah” by leonard cohen being played as an easter and christmas song, “zombie” by the cranberries” being played as a halloween song, and “born in the U.S.A.” by bruce springsteen being played as a Fourth of July/generic us patriotism song have got to be a special trifecta of the most no-listening-comprehension musical moments that happen on seasonal playlists every single year

A whole lot of people seem to think posting "[Thing] bad! Don't engage!" online is the same as political organizing.

#Politics #Was it a failed boycott or did you just slap a few tweets up and think that would work

thebibliosphere

The kid next door (talking toddler age) is playing outside and just wiped out in his Fisher Price car, and I just heard the babysitter say, “oh no, your insurance premium is definitely going to go up!” And the kid who had only been mildly sniffling before made the most confused, but startled sound you’ve ever heard.

Just very clearly an attempt at saying, “my what?”

He straight up forgot about his scraped knee and is now worried about whatever the fuck an insurance premium is.

xxxdragonfucker69xxx

mimosa-sexypeople-contests-2026

Tumblr Sexyman Contest 2026 Round 5 Part 1

Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz (Phineas and Ferb)

Mr. Ant Tenna (Deltarune)

Remaining time: 2 days 7 hours

Tenna art by @9Aaaalt29 on twt

earhartsease

oh fucking mood

homunculus-argument

Has either of your parents ever accidentally called you/your siblings the wrong name? (someone else's name, like other sibling, pet, etc)

Yes, at least once

No, but I've seen it happen to someone else

No, never

I don't have pets/siblings/parents/hair

Remaining time: 4 days 15 hours

homunculus-argument

I forgot to clarify that this excludes deanaming you if you've changed your name. I specifically meant the "brain offers the wrong word" kind of accidental name mix-up.

This was prompted by me and my boyfriend discussing handedness and being able to tell apart left and right. And me, being ambidextrous, was baffled by how do people with an obligate dominant hand mix up which side is the one with their Writing Hand and which one isn't?? And my boyfriend pointed out that I go "turn left - no I mean right" so much when giving directions that I have lost my navigator privileges.

I argued that mixing up the words isn't the same thing as mixing up the directions. Like if your mom accidentally called you the dog's name doesn't mean that she literally can't tell you apart from the dog. And he looked at me like this

Because evidently not only has this never happened to him, he has never heard of this being a thing. And he was so confident in this that I had to double-check that I'm not the only person this has ever happened to.

earhartsease

tv shows and films will be like "this is the work of the finest composer of our times" and then play some absolute generic film score bullshit

telekitnetic-art

BOOKWYRMS (V1 and V2) 🐲📚

Two matching original pieces painted on thrifted wooden book ends.

I'll be bringing this to Fur-Eh- it'll be up for auction at the fur-eh art show as a set!

mariacallous

“There is also a lot of elitism in food. I always say to people that in the old days you had to be very rich to get a pineapple. If you were poor you ate seasonally and locally and everything was organic. Now that the masses can go to the store and buy food that comes from all over, suddenly it’s considered not quite the thing. There’s a new elite which is saying it has to be local, it has to be seasonal, and it has to be organic. Yes, there are very good health concerns and very good ecological concerns. But at the same time there’s always someone trying to feel better about the food they eat and trying to make other people feel they’re making the wrong choice. That’s where snobbery can creep in. Sometimes I want to talk about condensed milk and canned peas simply because I get so cross with the food snobs. It so goes against our deepest desires when it comes to cooking for others. You want to make people feel welcome in your home. It’s such a basic human instinct to share food; all cultures have that. And instead you have ungenerous associations with food that sadden me too much. So many people are there to make other people feel bad about what they eat. It is quite expensive to eat seasonally and locally, and most people don’t have that choice.”

— Nigella Lawson