Fire and Butts

26yo - She/They/He - White reddslym's (under construction) account for asoiaf stuff so people arent bombarded with everything else I reblog. 18+ only, no minors.

[slymreddwyne]

My Valonqar Theory That I Just Wont Shut Up About:

It's Young Griff/Aegon VI/Faegon. Let me explain.

Maggy the Frog doesnt say "your Valonqar" just "THE Valonqar", implying that it doesnt have to be HER "little brother" (i.e. Tyrion or Jaime).

Also why does Maggy specifically use the High Valyrian word for "little brother"? She could have just said it in Westerosi if it wasnt important. Yknow who else is a (supposed) little brother who presumably has been taught High Valyrian? Young Griff.

I suspect that the Hands that choke Cersei out might not be literal hands, but Hands of the King (perhaps YG will name both Joncon and Varys as co-hands? Or Joncon's greyscaled hands will infect her, and it will eventually spread to her throat, asphyxiating her).

[what-even-is-thiss]

I loved someone once who was disabled. I didn’t care that they were disabled. I didn’t care that if we lived together I’d probably be supporting them for the rest of their life. I didn’t care about the hospital visits. I didn’t care about their limitations. Because it was them. Because if it’s them then all that work isn’t work at all.

One of the things that ended up driving us apart in the end though is that they didn’t believe me when I told them this. They didn’t believe that I didn’t care about their disabilities. They didn’t believe that I was prepared to support them because my love turned all of that work into nothing.

As we drifted apart I learned something about myself. I can only fight to try to make someone believe that I care about them for so long. The hospital visits, the care tasks, the financial stuff, the limitations, I don’t care about. I could do that forever without a second thought. Fighting to be believed though? To have my love for someone questioned by them at every turn? I can’t do that.

It’s been a while since I drifted apart from this person I thought I’d be spending the rest of my life with so I feel like I can talk about it now and I guess I wanna suggest that maybe you should believe people sometimes when they say that they love you because your insistence that they don’t could be the thing that makes you drift apart.

[perception-filter]

staring at the dessert menu and twirling my hair and going "should I be baaaaddd" until the autistic girl I'm eating with says "there is nothing bad about eating dessert. it is a morally neutral action"

[cryptotheism]

The funniest thing you can add to any piece of media is a boy detective. Breaking Bad needed a 13 year old child who goes around looking for clues to the caper and whatnot.

[aflo]

Hank

[couchnapping]

[queenaegon]

i understand all that shit about honor and knighthood and solemn vows but “kingslayer” is simply a bad insult. it sounds cool as fuck. might as well call him the landlord annihilator or the billionaire’s bane.

[mumblesplash]

it’s so magical and beautiful that there are sprawling interconnected cave systems carved deep into the earth by various geological forces and you don’t have to go in them. there are miles and miles of stone passageways in total darkness that require you to exhale all the air out of your lungs to squeeze through parts of them and you don’t have to be there. some of these squeezes are underwater and require cave divers to take off their oxygen tanks and push them through ahead of them and me i am above ground looking at the sky as we speak. there are untold subterranean wonders no human has ever seen and i will not be the one to discover them #grateful #blessed

[mumblesplash]

so true there could be any number of undiscovered species down there all of which are none of my business and never will be. peace and love on (the surface of) planet earth 💕

[brexitfc]

[unpretty]

every time i remember that this happened i lose my mind all over again

[unpretty]

happy mooninite panic day

[targetedknowledge]

[coyoteobsessed]

[kata4a]

try not to imply that vegetables can have redemptive relationships with god???

[ladyylynx]

hits blunt. nedsei 1940s detective au man. cersei as the archetypical femme fatale and eddard trying to uncover the murder of his foster father jon arryn. eddard is divorced and robert drinks himself to death and cersei attempts to manipulate ned only to end up falling for him over time as She tries to clear her own name of jon arryn's death.

[slymreddwyne]

Yeah Ned pretty much IS a Noir Detective already

[goldcrescent]

Iron Islander voice: Theon you [19 syllable dolphin noise slur] I see you came back WOKE and GAY and a WOMAN from us leaving you as a child prisoner to the guy with an 8 foot sword that makes you drag it around to executions in front of his screaming faced tree gods as a daily reminder that he can and will kill you (a child) just like he killed the rest of your family (some of which were also children). Did you have fun polishing his sword? I’ll bet. Did you write this letter yourself? Knowing there’s a one person literacy limit? Should we call you Theon the Reader, you reading fuck? And standing here in a jean jacket you bought yourself, may as well be sucking dick at old navy. You know who’s NOT woke or gay or a woman? Your sister Asha. Why can’t you be less gay and woke and a woman, like Asha? I bet she could run a democratic election because you know what isn’t gay Theon? Democracy

[ladyylynx]

@nedcatweek day five: werewolf lycan Eddard Stark

uncensored on bluesky👀

[xang-yyumi]

Creature commando girlfriends<33

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

<3_<3

THIS IS ALL I WANTED FROM THIS SHOW <3

I just want the grumpy one and the sunshine one to be a couple <3

AND HAVE ALL THE MONSTER SEX <3

[daily-spooky]

[galahadwilder]

Metropolis has one of the least corrupt police departments in the DCU, because some sneaky bastard reporter who looks like a nerdy lumberjack keeps sniffing out and exposing all the racists in the department. (This is because Superman, while not always listening, can always hear when one of them to start saying racist things and once he does he immediately starts investigating as Clark.)

Who watches the watchers? Some hulking bespectacled doofus, apparently.

[galahadwilder]

Imagine being at a peaceful political protest in Metropolis and the cops are showing up in full body armor and then Superman arrives, and you’re like, oh, shit, hes here to break up the protest but then he lands and joins it??? And he keeps lecturing the cops?

[galahadwilder]

“These people have the right to free assembly!” he says while brandishing a copy of the Metropolis Legal Code. You’re not sure where he got it. He wasn’t carrying it when he landed, he’s got no pockets—was he storing it up his butt?

[galahadwilder]

One of the cops shoots a tear gas canister into the crowd and you have a moment of fear before confusedly worrying whether it would even effect Superman

Turns out it doesn’t, because the canister lands and he just. Eats all the tear gas.

[galahadwilder]

He keeps calling out individual cops by name. “Hey Ken! Does your mother know you’re shooting at unarmed children? Should I tell her next time I see her at Bibbo’s?”

[galahadwilder]

Some brave yet dickish reporter asks him whether his mother knows he’s advocating against rule of law and he just smiles that goofy, inviting smile of his and goes “my mom was arrested 12 times back in the late 70s. She thinks I should be throwing punches.”

[magohallmi]

Im sorry superman can eat tear gass? Wtf i i never watched superman. This is wild

[galahadwilder]

It’s more that he inhales it, but yeah, his canonical first response to seeing any kind of toxic or harmful gas is “breath it in, because my lungs are invulnerable and yours aren’t”

That said, your provided visual is hilarious