my name smeedle

i know it is old frog food

[glumshoe]

I pretend to be complex and clever but in reality, nothing has ever made me laugh harder than those bad Chinese subtitles from the bootleg Lord of the Rings DVDs. Tears streaming down my face, core aching, slowly suffocating because I’m laughing too hard.

[absynthe--minded]

also (because one can never have too many of these)

and my personal favorite:

[glumshoe]

I somehow forgot to add my own favorite, which is this one:

I also appreciate the ones that really change the tone and suggest that the characters openly loathe each other…

and this one, which gently encourages self-care:

[steddiely]

listen you guys forgot some important ones

[nosoundinspace]

ya’ll forgot the best one

[mantisanarchy]

I CAN’T BREATHE

[jugex]

this is a treasure that cannot be buried

[mantisanarchy]

Had to reblog again because I spent hours searching for this and I finally found it.

[eltonjohndenver]

DJHSFAJDGHFDJGHFKGHG

[priscellie]

Excuse me, but you are excluding some GEMS:

And the greatest of all:

[beemovieerotica]

[thefakebernadettebanner]

Happy 20th anniversary to They're Taking the Hobbits to Isengard specifically

[welcomingdisaster]

[elf voice] ugh. he's mansplaining valinor to me

[chernobog13]

A Nazgûl from Ralph Bakshi's animated film The Lord of the Rings (1978).

[energyprison]

its so funny that tolkien had some shit to say about every damn aspect of middle earth but when he said there were 5 wizards he really just made 3 and then said "and there were 2 blue ones as well"

[sail-to-live]

[easterneuropeangirliedotcom]

pov: you a tolkien elf

[hamrikaa]

LOTR yuri 💍

[uncahier]

[its-a-me-kaio]

Crazy how only getting information about the world from ONE source might negatively skew your perception of reality

[haridraws]

[isildur-apologist]

I made a map to express the way I feel about the geography of Middle Earth because JRRT suffers from something I like to call “has never seen a mountain range in his life”

[ekjohnston]

The mountains come from the same place as the light and the music.

+++

But let's not pretend mountains are the only way that Tolkien was like "meh", when creating landforms. This world is either flat or round, depending on your species and the state of your soul.

Also, to be fair, Fellowship came out in 1954 and we didn't nail down tectonic theory until 1960, so

[kaslynspeaks]

#my dad legit made an entire class at my college for fantasy worldbuilding cuz this map pissed him off so much#he has a PhD in maps btw (via @dragonpyre)

prev this is the funniest thing I've read all day

[ingridverse]

I want to take that course. Failing that, maybe @dragonpyre 's dad should write a book

[disorganisedautodidact]

canonically the rectangular mountain range was made by an evil minor god. so it not looking like a natural mountain range? fits actually

[sunsetbuddie]

hey so anyone else just, feel thin. sort of stretched. like butter scraped over too much bread. like you need a holiday. a very long holiday. and you don't expect you shall return? or is that just me and bilbo baggins

[and-fishing-equipment]

sorry but someone assuming you have "left a fandom" when you don't post about it a lot anymore feels like bilbo coming home to the sackville bagginses having him presumed dead and selling all his stuff. girl i was just on a little quest????

[arcanumnyx]

Just to remind youu... The Fellowship leaves Rivendell on the 25th of December. So LotR is infact a Christmas movie, DON'T FORGET THE CHRISTMAS REWATCH!! Ok, love you, bye! 💚🎄🧙🏽‍♂️

[tanoraqui]

“I asked chatgpt” well I journeyed to Rivendell to seek council of Elrond Half-Elven, wise among men and wizards alike, and he invited me to a meeting with representatives of all the free peoples of Middle Earth. It turns out that my trouble is but part of the trouble of all the world, the origins of which lie in earlier, grander ages—but none of us stand alone!

[peatbogpirate]

this one's from last year but I just started my rotk reread and this scene makes me giggle every time

[smeedlesfrogfood]

the definitive Gandalf ranking

(I will only be ranking movie/TV designs of Gandalf the Grey)

1. Gandalf from the 1985 teleplay The Fabulous Journey of Mr. Bilbo Baggins the Hobbit

This Gandalf has a long beard, thigh high boots, weird eyebrows, and glitter on his cheeks. What else could you need? 9.75/10 for not having a funny hat

2. Gandalf from the 1978 Bakshi film The Lord of the Rings

This Gandalf is amazing, he has a big hat, a big beard, and even bigger robes. Also his facial expressions crack me up. 9.5/10 for being mostly blue

3. Gandalf from the 1977 Rankin/Bass film The Hobbit

This Gandalf has the best eyebrows anyone will ever see, a styled beard, a nice and pointy nose, and a lovely little hood. 9.25/10 for having a cool shot of him in front of lightning

4. Gandalf from the 2001-2003 Peter Jackson film trilogy The Lord of the Rings

This Gandalf is truly Grey and has the wandering look down to a t: the belt, the bag, and most importantly the pipe in his staff. 9/10 for his short beard

5. Gandalf from the 1967 Gene Deitch film The Hobbit

This Gandalf is simple yet striking, he has his signature long beard and a funny little thing on his head. 7/10 for wearing just one big sheet

6. Gandalf from the 1993 TV series Hobitit

This Gandalf has the hair and mustache, yet lacks the overall outfit. (also I couldn't find a picture of it) 5/10 for being basic and bland

7. Gandalf from the 1991 teleplay Khraniteli

This Gandalf is odd but not in a good way, the best thing about his design are his bangs. 3/10 for putting in minimal effort

[sewn-with-lilies-fair]

@smeedlesfrogfood but I need to know your rating of Purple Beard And Sunglasses Gandalf from the Russian Hobbit opera from 2002...

[smeedlesfrogfood]

This Gandalf has a great hat and bears, has a staff and robes. I like the fun collar and sleeve situation. 9.1/10 for looking like he is belting a song