ABBY: …apparently you consider the fashion trends of the remaining communist nations: China, Cuba, Vietnam, Laos and North Korea –
KEVIN: What about Antarctica?
KEVIN: Um … Antarctica. The largest and southernmost principality on planet Earth… Average annual temperature of negative seventy-six degrees Fahrenheit, Abby.
ABBY: Um, well, that’s great information, Kevin, but there are no communists in Antarctica.
KEVIN: Oh, really, how do you know?
ABBY: There are like twelve people there.
KEVIN: But they could be communists.
KEVIN: Yeah, oh, did you talk to them? Did you call them today?
ABBY: Yes, I called all of them today and they said they’re not communists.
KEVIN: Oh, really, well, that’s expensive, then, to call them. Do you have a phone card?
ABBY: You’re so not funny –
KEVIN: There are Russian scientists in Antarctica, Abby.
ABBY: Russia isn’t communist any more, Kevin!
KEVIN: Yeah, have you met a Russian?
KEVIN: Have you ever met one?
KEVIN: Well, then you don’t know!
ABBY: Mr Richards, how am I expected to debate like this?!
KEVIN: Yeah, Mr Richards, you shouldn’t allow this -
MR RICHARDS: Settle down. Settle down.
ABBY: He doesn’t know what he’s talking about!
ABBY: For the hundredth time, it’s a beauty mark.
KEVIN: Maybe your mole’s communist. Nice mole, comrade.
ABBY: It’s a beauty mark!
KEVIN: Hey, your mole is shaped like Antarctica.
ABBY: Could you take a step back, because that breath is about to knock me over.
KEVIN: Yeah, it’s also the size of Antarctica.
ABBY: It’s ‘Antarctica’. And no, it’s not.
KEVIN: Hey, let’s make your mole a continent, call it ‘Abbyland’. And let that be my closing argument. “When you create a world where people are exactly the same, it gets dull, after you realise that they are you only not. And though some people might prefer communism and Russia to America and Antarctica, I wouldn’t. Thank you.
MR RICHARDS: Uh, well said, Kevin. A+