spaced-out

Finn | 26 | ♋︎ | He/Him Hello! I reblog stuff like music/aesthetics/fandoms etc. Here's my art and here is my face! :: 8.28.18 ::

[im-mender]

she took the pey wet in the divorce

[im-mender]

I only got custody of our babby's yed. not even the full babby

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

she told the judge i had been smacking our barms

[im-mender]

in Wigan I'm as good as fucked

[yamada-ryo]

honestly one of the all time tweets of all time tbh

[justspilledcoffee]

Hey guys did I mention I live on a fucking weird island and sometimes land crabs with 8-inch claws try to get into my house

[tamascotchi-deactivated20190101]

cute puppy what breed is he

[purified-zone]

sideways

[paracunt]

Hayley Williams presents: The Ego Death at a Bachelorette Party Tour at The Lyric in Baltimore, Maryland (2026) via savannahwallett / x

[cheaphalloweencostume]

genuinely what im up to on tumblr these days

[therisingking]

Girl when I tell you my life flashed before my eyes

[saturniandragon]

[lingonberry24]

[foolishmortal]

what if you told someone you liked their shoelaces while you were on your knees blowing them in a bathroom stall and they told you that they stole them from the president

[therisingking]

You bitches really won’t let me catch a fucking break huh

[gyhujikoijuhyguhij-deactivated2]

this is what i say when anything happens ever

[shadowgremlin]

My wife’s idea of decompressing after the busy holiday was to rearrange every piece of furniture in our home is this an ADHD thing or just a her thing

I’m not complaining the way she’s done it is much better than it was it’s just like how is this your idea of a relaxing weekend

[kaity--did]

Listen I don't get to decide when the drunk elf that is my executive actually does the functioning but when he does we have a SMALL WINDOW OF TIME before he finds the schnapps again and we're done

[honeysbunchesofoats]

[kaity--did]

yes this exactly

[luminouspica]

So to me, there are spoons (general energy cost) and carnival tickets (specific energy cost).

Spoons can be used pretty much anywhere.

Carnival tickets are only good for the carnival, and it’s only in town for a limited amount of time.

So like, if I get “kitchen cleaning” carnival tickets, I can’t use that to clean my bedroom, that’s not where the carnival is.

[lingonberry24]

phrase added to permanent vocabulary

[fagcrisis]

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

[maryoliveoil]

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich

[longseasons]

hello pervert with excellent music taste

[mattawhiteley]

#Flintstones #meme

[fred-flintstone-of-bedrock]

#Flintstones #meme

[knowyournewmeme]

Ya Ba do!

[yonomna-deactivated20170207]

Not what he says

[fred-flintstone-of-bedrock]

Ya Ba do!

[thoodleoo]

the joy of working with middle school aged children is that, regardless of how long you've been doing it, they will always find novel ways to annoy and confuse you, which is okay because that's the natural state of the middle school aged child. anyway suffice it to say that for the past three weeks of school my 6th grade class has been greeting me at my door by lining up outside of it, playing the national anthem, and saluting me as i walk in.

[jouster-ari]

What they're doing to you:

[creekfiend]

I'm so glad that that truncated fucking ran-into-a-wall-at-speed tadpole-ass looking squirrel only lives in high altitude forests in Borneo bc this means I am extremely unlikely to encounter one in my day to day life. thank god

[tuftedpygmysquirrel]

Hello.

[creekfiend]

DID YOU MAKE THIS BLOG SIMPLY TO TORMENT ME

[tuftedpygmysquirrel]

I can go upside down.

[creekfiend]

WHERE IS THE REST OF YOU

[twistcmyk]

[thatbowserguy]

Coward I would say Bowser

[twistcmyk]

i bet you would

[iwanttohavesexwithsupermario]

i would say something else

[seat-safety-switch]

Space Dog, the dog that's been to space, has once again beaten me out for a job. It's not really even the dog's fault. Everyone is willing to hire him, because how often do you get to hire a dog that's also an astronaut? No need to check qualifications. Unfortunately, he then gets fired for various dog-related reasons (pooping on the rug, biting investors) and we're back to square one. In the meantime, he's taken a job that I could have had, and competing for the next one I'm trying to interview for.

You might think that I'm simply unlucky, and in a way I am. What are the odds that a galaxy-spanning canine is interviewing for the same jobs I am? Believe me, I've calculated those odds, and it doesn't make me feel any better. Every time I walk out of the hiring manager's office and see that fucking cur sitting in the waiting room, wearing his stupid little tie, holding his stupid little resume, I can feel that moment of hope stolen away forever.

I can't even get mad at him. He's a dog. He had no idea what was going on when NASA jammed him into that rocket. He had no idea what was going on when the capsule landed in the ocean, and everyone was making a big fuss over him and feeding him Milkbones. And now he has no idea what he's doing in the corporate rat race. If anyone's to blame, it's those Goddamn rocket managers who couldn't even find a cushy retirement job for a Golden Retriever.

Well, there are still some jobs out there. I've got an interview lined up for tomorrow for some kind of computer-touching gig. I figure I'm pretty good with MSPaint, and I can spell "Excel" on my first try without needing to write it on my hand first. As long as that dog doesn't show up, I think I've got a pretty good chance. Hmm. Hey, do you happen to own a giant squirrel suit and are free around 9:30 tomorrow?

[notjusthespongenextdoor]

For a city to be walkable. It must also be sittable.

[notjusthespongenextdoor]

#every time I read this phrase the same thing happens#I read it as shittable and go wait that can't be right#oh right they were talking about public benches that makes more sense#but public bathrooms available without fees should also be a thing tho#cities should definitely be shittable#it happens EVERY SINGLE TIME

it must also be shittable

[sandmandaddy69]

[rottytops]