NOW' S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A [[BIG SHOT]]!!!

HOLY [[cungadero]]!! IT' S ME, EVERY' S FAVORITE [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]]!!! EAHAEHAEHAEHAEHAEH!!! WELCOME TO MY [[Brand New]] [[Home-made Storefront Site]]!!!!! DO YOU WANNA BE A BE A [[BIG SHOT]]???? THEN [[Call Now]] and [[Specil Deal]] JUST FOR YOU!!!! LIKES: KROMER, [[Specil Deal]],, PIPIS, [[HeartShapedObject]], [[BIG SHOT]], AND MOS OF ALL, [[Hyperlink Blocked]]!!!!!!!!!! DISLIKES: THAT GODDAMN [[Clown Around Town]], [[Mike]] PLEASE ANSWER MY [[Pick Up the Phone]]!!!

[merchant-offical]

Greetings.

I am the merchant.

My name does not matter.

For it was forgotten by many the minute I left.

If you wish to buy, I have many things.

Do not ask me to list them, just ask if I have something.

I most likely do.

You may sell.

Shall we begin?

Pfp drawn by @killer-offical @satan-offical @mrevilvillanplotman-offical @sans-the-skeleconch-offical @smol-gremlin-child-offical @spamton-offical1997 @silly-little-arson-frog-offical @postie-offical @lore-anon-offical @laciffo-3oa-ton-yletinifed @light-offical @da-police-offical @freedom-motif-offical @poseidon-offical @poetry-official @offical-fanartist-offical @i-am-a-fish @killer-offical @kinger-offical @knife-roomba-offical @horsebutblue @beansandsausages32 @waiter-offical @man-offical @gold-offical @evil-pukicho-real-offical @evil-lemon-shark-offical @evil-man-offical @an-angel-offical

[spamton-offical1997]

* MERCHANT, HUH?

* THATS OUNDS LIKE A [[Salesman]] TO [[Yiurs Truly]]!!!!!!!

* PLEASURE TO [[Meat]] YOU!!!!!

* WANNA MAKE A [[Specil Deal]]??????

[merchant-offical]

Very well.

What do you offer?

[spamton-offical1997]

* WELL WELL [[I”m Not Well]]!!!!!!

* CONSIDER THIS

* IF [[Oui]] WORK TO GET HER, WE COULD

* WE COULD

* [[Freedom]].

* SO?? WADDYA[[Sniff]]???????

* DO WE HAVE A [[Limited Time Deal]]???????????????????????????

* ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

* Please accept me.

[merchant-offical]

Greetings.

I am the merchant.

My name does not matter.

For it was forgotten by many the minute I left.

If you wish to buy, I have many things.

Do not ask me to list them, just ask if I have something.

I most likely do.

You may sell.

Shall we begin?

Pfp drawn by @killer-offical @satan-offical @mrevilvillanplotman-offical @sans-the-skeleconch-offical @smol-gremlin-child-offical @spamton-offical1997 @silly-little-arson-frog-offical @postie-offical @lore-anon-offical @laciffo-3oa-ton-yletinifed @light-offical @da-police-offical @freedom-motif-offical @poseidon-offical @poetry-official @offical-fanartist-offical @i-am-a-fish @killer-offical @kinger-offical @knife-roomba-offical @horsebutblue @beansandsausages32 @waiter-offical @man-offical @gold-offical @evil-pukicho-real-offical @evil-lemon-shark-offical @evil-man-offical @an-angel-offical

[spamton-offical1997]

* MERCHANT, HUH?

* THATS OUNDS LIKE A [[Salesman]] TO [[Yiurs Truly]]!!!!!!!

* PLEASURE TO [[Meat]] YOU!!!!!

* WANNA MAKE A [[Specil Deal]]??????

[me----irl]

Reblog if you think the person you reblogged this from deserves to be happy.

[work-in-promptgress]

There's a piñata hanging outside. When you investigate, though, there's nothing holding it up.

Only a string, leading endlessly into the sky.

[copyright-offical]

You hit it, it’s turns out to be @spamton-offical1997

Yours writingly, ©

[spamton-offical1997]

* It pulls the strings and makes them ring.

[princeofthebookshelf]

I JUST REMEMBERED THE FISH SONG AND UUUUUH

I SHOULD NOT BE TRUSTED WITH CAPCUT

@satan-offical x 🐟 🐟 🐟

[satan-offical]

This makes me want to go back to heaven

[copyright-offical]

The word [[HEAVEN]] has been copyrighted!

—Yours troutly ©

[spamton-offical1997]

* NOO HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]]!!!!!!

[copyright-offical]

Sorry friend, maybe you just need to be [[Big]] [[bIg]] BIGGER THAN [[Never…]

Yours unforgettingly, ©

[spamton-offical1997]

*

* Y O U

* I know you…

* You’re different now.

* You’re new.

* Where have you gone?

[satan-offical]

okay officals who weren't terminated raise your hand ✋

[spamton-offical1997]

* ✋

[princeofthebookshelf]

I JUST REMEMBERED THE FISH SONG AND UUUUUH

I SHOULD NOT BE TRUSTED WITH CAPCUT

@satan-offical x 🐟 🐟 🐟

[satan-offical]

This makes me want to go back to heaven

[copyright-offical]

The word [[HEAVEN]] has been copyrighted!

—Yours troutly ©

[spamton-offical1997]

* NOO HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]]!!!!!!

[freedom-motif-offical]

i am freedom motif offical hello

@satan-offical @purple-morphsuit-guy-offical @paranoia-offical @optimus-prime-offical @megatron-offical @chickfila-offical @silly-little-arson-frog-offical @spamton-offical1997

@sans-offical @gus-offical @cleaning-spray-offical

[spamton-offical1997]

* WHY HELLO HELLO HELL O [[F R E E D O M]]!!!!

* SAY HAVEN’ T I [[Smell]] YOU SOMEWHERE [[Long Before Time Had A Name]]??

[roaring-knight-offical]

HEY. WHERE THE FUCK IS MY FREEDOM LEITNOTIF. YOU SAID YOU WOULD GIVE IT GO ME.

[spamton-offical1997]

* DON’ T YOU [[No]] NEVER TO TRUST A [[HonestMan]]?

* I NEVER SAID WHEN [[Yiurs Truly]] WOULD [[Give It Back]]!!!

* THAT’ S YOUR OWN [[Faulty Code]]!!!!!!!!

[freedom-motif-offical]

i am freedom motif offical hello

@satan-offical @purple-morphsuit-guy-offical @paranoia-offical @optimus-prime-offical @megatron-offical @chickfila-offical @silly-little-arson-frog-offical @spamton-offical1997

@sans-offical @gus-offical @cleaning-spray-offical

[spamton-offical1997]

* WHY HELLO HELLO HELL O [[F R E E D O M]]!!!!

* SAY HAVEN’ T I [[Smell]] YOU SOMEWHERE [[Long Before Time Had A Name]]??

[zerozerozio]

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements

[boimann]

reblog to let people know it's ok to bother you with questions and statements

[no-one-offical]

‎

[satan-offical]

satan big fan here, how do i become a big shot like you

Be funny + have big dick energy + don't use proper punctuation

[spamton-g-spamton-offical]

[[Big Shot]]?

[spamton-offical1997]

[[Big Shot]]?

[spamton-offical1997]

Why?

*…

*…

*Why…?

*Mike.

*Tell me. Why?

*Why won’t you pick up my calls, Mike…

*…

[mothman-offical]

I wanna find out exactly how many blogs there are on the offical-verse. Reblog this to ONLY your offical blog and let's see.

Comment your tags if you are not a offical blog.

Don't let it stop.

[poland-offical]

cześć

[grisha-offical]

Hi

[silliestcolressfan]

affirmations for people with multiple blogs:

☆ i am on the right blog

☆ i wont accidentally post on the wrong blog

☆ i can get my blogs right

☆ i have a normal amount of side blogs

☆ this isnt going on the wrong blog

[ominous-signs]

Additional affirmations:

☆ No one ever saw me post a wrong post

☆ No one will immediately go to reblog that wrong post (if it were to even happen)

☆ I know what I am doing

☆ I know all the buttons I click

☆ I know which side blog I am currently on

[no-one-offical]

‎

[chemicahs]

THE SHAPE MY FUCKING CAT IS MAKING RIGHT NOW?

[chemicahs]

Gee, I wish there was a way to convey chatter between two comic book characters

The humble speech bubble:

[kittybroker]

Hear that voice? That's the voice of incredible low prices! The humble speech bubble only $19.85!

[idacreature]

@spamton-offical1997

[spamton-offical1997]

* [[Here]] THAT [[The Voices]]??????

* THAT' S [[The Voice]] OF [[The Incredibles]] LOW [[Prick]]!!!! THE HUMBLE [[Bubble You Can't Say That]] ONLY [[$999.99]]!!!!!!!!!!!!

[spamton-offical1997]

Can I get a hug

* OF COURSE Y OU CAN [[Crushing My Ribcage]]!!!!!!!

* WHO WOULDN' T WANT A [[Hydraulic Press]] FROM [[Yiurs Truly]]?????

[ice-e-offical]

wel

WELCOME ALL OR NOTHING TO ThE OFFICAL ICE-E'S Bl"o"g

We have mAny produCts such As

Pezza

P"e"zza

Blue

The food

Them™ and

P"e"zza 2: the Sequel©®

So come on down to the follow button and press!

ICE-E'S P"e"zza

Because you'll eat

[ice-e-offical]

apparently I was supposed to tag a bunch of other offical blogs to get started.

@watercooler-offical @man-offical @rouxls-kaard-offical @spamton-offical1997 @tv-time-offical @hammer-of-justice-offical @no-one-offical @satan-offical @fungi-official

Anyway, I'll go back into character now

[spamton-offical1997]

* HEY HE Y [[Hay Fever]]!!!! A LITTLE [[Twitter.com]] TOLD [[Yiurs Truly]] THAT

* [[50th Customer]] REACHED OUT TO [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]]!!!! DOES THIS [[Mean To Me]] YOU ARE [[Ready, Set, Go]] TO MAKE [[Specil Deal]]!!!!

* YES!! YES!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* NOW. YOU ARE [[Valued Customer]] CAN BE [[Big]] WITH [[HonestMan]]!!! JUST SIGN YOUR [[Full Government Name]] ON THE [[Pipis]] AND BECOME [[Big Shot]]!!!!!!!!!

* WELL?? WHADDAYA [[Please Say Yes]]??????

[ice-e-offical]

You've gOt skiIIs Mr. G spamton perhaPs you couId heIp me heIp me. Buslness Has been fizZIing and an oId friend could be quite helpful to manlpUIate. So simply sign your Soul Away and you'll have a job at ICE-E'S P"e"zza Earning Debt, you'll also receive money.

ICE-E'S P"e"zza

What was that?

[spamton-offical1997]

* HAEHEAHEAHEAHEAHEAHEA

* OH YOU [[Mismatched Cash Piano]]!!!! DON' T YOU KNOW THAT [[Yiurs Truly]] AM SMARTER THAN THAT???? BESIDES.

* I [[Threw Up]] MY SOUL [[Long Before Time Had A Name]]!!!!!!!

[ice-e-offical]

And now you know How I feEL, so before I give you A Piece Of My MiND you need over 100 UnSatisfied customers To leave a NagAtive review

ICE-E'S P"e"zza

Because you're hands it

[spamton-offical1997]

* NICE TRY BUT THE [[Joke Book]] IS ON [[Youre Tab]]!!!!!

* EVERY LAST [[1]] OF [[Yiurs Truly]] [[Valued Customers]] HAVE [[Left Turn]] WHOLLY [[I Will Never Be Satisfied]]!!!!

* IT IS [[Youre Move]], [[Buttman]]!!!!!!

[ice-e-offical]

Before we end this discussion I have a question for you... Who Asked. You couldn't sell a Dollar to a SharK nonetheless sell a Me to a You. DisContinue.

ICE-E'S P"e"zza

And now we're Dying

[spamton-offical1997]

*

* HOW DARE Y OU.

* I AM [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]] AND YOU WILL TREAT [[Yiurs Truly]] WITH [[Topical Iodine]]!!!!!!

[ice-e-offical]

the truth is that No. If you have any further question then you need to be ready to Die, why? Because You're Effed.

[spamton-offical1997]

*

* HAEHEAHEAHEAHEAHEAHEA

* IT LOOKS LIKE [[Yiurs Truly]] HAVE JUST MADE MY VERY [[First Edition]] [[Business Rival]].

* I SUGGEST Y OU [[Take A Nap]] WITH ONE EYE [[Open For Business]].