Nana Visitor said that whenever they would try to renegotiate contracts between seasons for Deep Space Nine, Paramount would threaten to kill their characters in a shuttle craft accident and refused them.
No need to support Paramount, watch it all here!!!
Recently I shared my first 30 pages with my mentor, and now I’m sharing her advice to all of you. (This is part 3! Find part 2 here, and part 1 here). Her biggest advice was to change my very first line.
I already knew that the first line was one of the most important lines of the whole book. It had to be the big hook to the novel, the reason to read to the second sentence, and then the third, and then so on until (hopefully) I’ve hooked my reader all the way to the end.
However, I missed an important detail about it. The hook isn’t just about being interesting—it’s about conveying your main character right from moment one.
Let’s take a look at some first sentences from a few books I’ve enjoyed recently:
“Mom is dying, and we both know it.” – A Wilderness of Stars by Shea Ernshaw
“Blue Sargent had forgotten how many times she’d been told that she would kill her true love.” – The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater
“They say you can spot a true Shennong-Shi by their hands—palms coloured by the stain of the earth, fingertips scarred from thorns, a permanent crust of soil and blood darkening the crescents of their nails. I used to look at my hands with pride. Now, all I can think is, These are the hands that buried my mother.”- A Magic Steeped in Poison by Judy I. Lin
(The spelling on this one is a bit off, I don’t have the right characters on my keyboard. Apologies.)
“The night harrow found me, I was digging up a fox’s bones.” – These Fleeting Shadows by Kate Alice Marshall
What do they all have in common? They immediately introduce the main character’s conflict, be it internal, external, or both. They draw us in right away by saying, “this person’s life isn’t perfect—here’s why.”
You may remember when we talked about internal/external conflict in my Character is Plot post, except I called it Goal and Objective (respectively). These are the elements that make up your character’s journey, which is the main plot, so that’s what your first couple lines are for.
Once I rewrote my first line to match this lesson, it was immediately more compelling. That’s the whole point of a hook.
Recently I shared my first 30 pages with my mentor, and now I’m sharing her advice to all of you. (This is part 3! Find part 2 here, and part 1 here). Her biggest advice was to change my very first line.
I already knew that the first line was one of the most important lines of the whole book. It had to be the big hook to the novel, the reason to read to the second sentence, and then the third, and then so on until (hopefully) I’ve hooked my reader all the way to the end.
However, I missed an important detail about it. The hook isn’t just about being interesting—it’s about conveying your main character right from moment one.
Let’s take a look at some first sentences from a few books I’ve enjoyed recently:
“Mom is dying, and we both know it.” – A Wilderness of Stars by Shea Ernshaw
“Blue Sargent had forgotten how many times she’d been told that she would kill her true love.” – The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater
“They say you can spot a true Shennong-Shi by their hands—palms coloured by the stain of the earth, fingertips scarred from thorns, a permanent crust of soil and blood darkening the crescents of their nails. I used to look at my hands with pride. Now, all I can think is, These are the hands that buried my mother.”- A Magic Steeped in Poison by Judy I. Lin
(The spelling on this one is a bit off, I don’t have the right characters on my keyboard. Apologies.)
“The night harrow found me, I was digging up a fox’s bones.” – These Fleeting Shadows by Kate Alice Marshall
What do they all have in common? They immediately introduce the main character’s conflict, be it internal, external, or both. They draw us in right away by saying, “this person’s life isn’t perfect—here’s why.”
You may remember when we talked about internal/external conflict in my Character is Plot post, except I called it Goal and Objective (respectively). These are the elements that make up your character’s journey, which is the main plot, so that’s what your first couple lines are for.
Once I rewrote my first line to match this lesson, it was immediately more compelling. That’s the whole point of a hook.
Writing can be done in an infinite amount of ways by an infinite amount of people in an infinite amount of styles. No, I don’t think the monkeys would have written Shakesphere. I think they eventually would have written something we’d refer to as Monkey-Sphere.
What I’m trying to say is that improving at writing is not a one-size-fits-all kind of process. There’s one important thing you need to consider if this is your goal:
What kind of writer do I want to be?
To improve at commercial fiction is going to look a whole lot different than improving at literary fiction. If you’re a bit lost here, check out my post: what kind of writer are you.
Once you have a solid idea of what kind of writer you are/you want to be, you can start focusing on the demands of your style.
Commercial Fiction
You are a writer who focuses on a snappy, engaging, fast-moving plot with fun and equally engaging characters. Think The Inheritance Games, The Maze Runner, Divergent, The Hunger Games.
To improve at writing commercial fiction, you’re going to focus on three things:
Your pacing
Your plot and its hook
Your characters
The expectations of your genre
Literary Fiction
You are a writer who focuses on beautiful language and challenging the reader, either how they think of themselves, or how they think of society (or both). You see your pieces as works of art that hold a greater meaning in society—they aren’t just entertainment. Think To Kill a Mockingbird, The Great Gatsby, The Secret History, Flowers for Algernon.
To improve here, you’re going to focus on these things:
Lyrical prose
Deep character development
Complex themes
Breaking from the “norm” or convention of novel writing
Understanding the world and society on a deep, educated level
Upmarket Fiction
Seen as the best of both worlds, you are a writer who has both the ear for lyrical, beautiful language and the instincts for an engaging plot and characters. Think Blood over Bright Haven, Gone Girl, The Time Traveler’s Wife, The Night Circus
You’re going to focus on these things:
Sensory/lyrical prose – vocabulary!
Character-driven plots with a sharp hook
A solid theme
Expectations of your genre
Taking these pointers, the best way to improve in your area of writing is to read in your area of writing. And read intentionally, really analyzing how other authors build their sentences, their plots, evolve their narratives, etc. Write down interesting word choices, lines you love, details about characters, themes (this is where an inspiration journal really comes in handy!)
Beautiful Contradictions: 10 Tragic Trait Pairs for Unforgettable Characters
As a writer, I’m endlessly fascinated by the contradictions in people—especially the tragic ones. These paradoxes reveal a deeper truth, where strength masks sorrow and beauty hides pain.
Here’s a list of 10 eccentric yet tragic trait pairs, combining contrasting qualities that give each character a poignant, melancholic edge. These characters could be deeply moving, tragic, and thought-provoking:
Boundlessly Creative & Emotionally Numb
Character Idea: They can craft breathtaking works of art that touch others’ hearts, yet they feel empty inside, unable to connect with their own creations. Their art speaks to everyone but themselves.
Empathic Healer & Chronically Ill
Character Idea: They can take others’ pain away but suffer from an uncurable illness that no one else can heal. Their gift is both their strength and their curse, draining them even as they save others.
Unwaveringly Brave & Afraid of Love
Character Idea: This character can face any monster or enemy without flinching, yet the idea of close relationships terrifies them. They would die for others but find it impossible to let anyone close.
Endlessly Forgiving & Self-Hating
Character Idea: They forgive everyone’s faults and see the good in others, yet they can’t forgive themselves. While they bring peace to those around them, they’re haunted by self-loathing that won’t ease.
Prophetic & Forgotten
Character Idea: They have visions of events to come but are cursed to be ignored and forgotten by everyone they meet. They watch disasters unfold knowing they could have helped, if only someone would remember them.
Sees the Beauty in Everything & Sees No Beauty in Themselves
Character Idea: They find awe and wonder in every person and place, yet feel completely unworthy and unsightly themselves. Their admiration of the world is genuine, but they’re tragically disconnected from their own worth.
Master of Memory & Haunted by Every Loss
Character Idea: They remember every detail of their life with perfect clarity, including the faces and voices of everyone they’ve lost. While they’re a living archive of the past, they’re crushed under the weight of their own memories.
Compelled to Help & Constantly Exploited
Character Idea: This character has an unshakable need to help others, even those who repeatedly betray or hurt them. They sacrifice everything to save others, often at their own expense, never learning when to walk away.
Radiantly Beautiful & Mortally Lonely
Character Idea: Their beauty inspires awe and admiration, but it also keeps people at a distance, assuming they’re untouchable. They’re surrounded by admiration but utterly alone, unable to find genuine connection.
Grants Wishes & Has None of Their Own Fulfilled
Character Idea: This character can grant any wish for others, yet no one has ever thought to ask what they want. They live to make others’ dreams come true, with a deep sadness at never receiving the same kindness.
💀 Making Your Villain Make Sense (Without Making Them Right™)
("because if I see one more war criminal with a sad diary entry get a redemption arc, I’m gonna throw my laptop.")
Here’s the thing: your villain doesn’t need to be redeemable. But they do need to make sense.
And I mean sense beyond "they’re evil and they monologue about it."
Or “they have a tragic past, so now they do murder <3.”
Or “they were right all along, the hero just couldn’t see it 🥺.”
Let’s fix that.
─────── ✦ ───────
🧠 STEP ONE: BUILD A LOGIC SYSTEM THAT ISN’T OURS
Your villain shouldn’t just be wrong, they should have their own internal system that works for them. Morally flawed? Absolutely. But coherent.
Ask yourself:
What do they value more than anything? (Power? Order? Loyalty? Vengeance?)
What do they believe about the world, and how did they get there?
What fear drives them? What future do they think they’re trying to prevent?
The villain doesn’t need to know they’re wrong. But you should.
Make their logic airtight. even if it’s awful. Give them cause and effect.
─────── ✦ ───────
👿 STEP TWO: STOP GIVING THEM THE BETTER IDEOLOGY
Listen. I love a “morally gray” moment as much as anyone. But if your villain is making all the good points and the hero’s just like “no because that’s mean,” your arc is upside down.
If your villain is critiquing injustice, oppression, or inequality, make sure their methods are the problem, not their entire worldview.
✖︎ WRONG:
Villain: “The ruling class is corrupt.”
Hero: “That’s not nice.”
✔︎ RIGHT:
Villain: “The ruling class is corrupt, so I’m burning the city and everyone in it.”
Hero: “So you’re just… committing genocide now?”
Your villain can touch a real issue. Just don’t let them be the only one talking about it, or solving it with horror movie logic.
─────── ✦ ───────
🔪 STEP THREE: GIVE THEM POWER THAT COSTS THEM
The best villains lose things too. They’re not just untouchable horror dolls in sexy coats. They make bad choices and pay for them. That’s where the drama lives.
Examples:
They isolate themselves.
They sacrifice people they love.
They get what they want, and it destroys them.
They know they’re the monster, and choose it anyway.
If your villain can kill a dozen people and feel nothing, that’s not scary. That’s boring.
Let them bleed. Let them regret it. Let them double down anyway.
─────── ✦ ───────
🧱 STEP FOUR: MAKE THEM PART OF THE WORLD, NOT OUTSIDE IT
Villains shouldn’t feel like they were patched in from another genre. They should be part of the world’s logic, culture, class system, history. They should reflect something about the setting.
Villains that slap:
The advisor who upheld the regime until they decided they deserved to rule.
The noble who’s using war to reclaim stolen legacy.
The ex-hero who thinks the system can’t be saved, only reset.
The priest who truly believes the gods demand blood.
They’re not just evil, they’re a product of the same world the hero is trying to save.
─────── ✦ ───────
👁 STEP FIVE: SHOW US THEIR SELF-JUSTIFICATION
You don’t need a tragic backstory™. But you do need to show us why they think they’re right. Not just with exposition, through action.
Let us watch them:
Protect someone.
Choose their goal over safety.
Justify the unjustifiable to a character who loves them.
Refuse to change, even when given a chance.
A villain who looks into the mirror and goes “Yes. I’m correct.” is 1000x scarier than one who sobs into a journal and says “I’m so broken 🥺.”
─────── ✦ ───────
🧨 BONUS ROUND: DON’T MAKE THEM A HATRED MEGAPHONE
Especially if you’re writing marginalized characters: don’t let your villain become a mouthpiece for slurs, abuse, or extremism just to make them “evil enough.” That’s lazy. And harmful.
You don’t need real-world hate speech to build a dark character. You need power, consequence, and intent.
─────── ✦ ───────
TL;DR:
Good villains don’t need to be right. They need to be real.
Not a vibe. Not a sad boy in a trench coat. Not a trauma monologue and then a sword fight.
They need logic. They need cost. They need to scare you because you get them, and still want them to lose.
Make them dangerous. Not relatable.
Make them whole. Not wholesome.
Make them make sense.
—rin t.
// thewriteadviceforwriters
// villain critic. final boss consultant. licensed chaos goblin
P.S. I made a free mini eBook about the 5 biggest mistakes writers make in the first 10 pages 👀 you can grab it here for FREE:
✦ A free (and actually helpful) guide to leveling up your first 10 pages ✦If you're unsure whether your opening is ✨doing enough✨ to hook re
(Emotional meltdowns that don’t look like meltdowns, but absolutely are)
The “Smiling Too Much” Grief
Your character’s entire world is on fire, and they’re asking if anyone wants more wine. That’s not denial, it’s an effort to hold the damn pieces together. Smile like a glue gun. Watch them crack.
The “Not Crying At the Funeral” Breakdown
They don't shed a tear. They organize everything. Perfect speech. Perfect outfit. But a week later, they scream into the laundry basket over a missing sock. That’s the moment. That’s the eulogy.
The “Silent Dinner Table” Fight
No yelling. No slamming doors. Just chewing. Clinking silverware. The kind of silence that tastes like metal. Let the reader feel the air shrink.
The “Polite but Dead Inside” Apology
They say “Sorry” because it’s expected, not because they’re ready. Their voice doesn’t crack. Their eyes don’t meet yours. This isn’t healing. This is a peace treaty with no peace.
The “I Don’t Want to Talk About It” Detour
The one where they ask about your day mid-sob. Redirect. Deflect. “Let’s not talk about me.” That’s rage choked by shame. Write it like it’s shoving itself into a smaller box.
The “Obsessively Productive” Meltdown
New projects. New hobbies. Suddenly they’re running marathons, baking sourdough, fixing the garage door. Because if they sit still for one second, they’ll break. Keep the camera on them when they finally sit.
The “Unsent Letters” Grief
They write it all down. Every damn emotion. Then burn it. Or delete it. Or hide it in a shoebox under their bed. It’s not for closure. It’s to let the ghosts know they were seen.
The “I’m Fine” That Echoes
Delivered too fast. Too sharp. You could bounce a quarter off it. “I’m fine” isn’t fine. It’s the dam cracking. Listen to the echo. Let another character hear the hollowness.
The “Hyper-Logical Rant” Rage
They argue with spreadsheets. With perfect bullet points. Cold rage—like ice, not fire. “I’m not mad, I’m just saying…” But that’s a lie. They’re volcanic under that clipboard.
The “Laughing in the Middle of the Breakdown” Moment
That bitter, hysterical laugh. The kind that sounds more like sobbing with teeth. Let it come at the worst time. Let it shock even them. That’s emotion refusing to stay boxed in.