[unadulteratedpiratepizza]

Them: Hello sir, may I have your name?

Me: No, you may not have my name, but you may call me John

Them: Sir, this is a DMV and I am not a fae

Me: Oh? Then you wouldn’t mind holding this iron horseshoe then, right?

*DMV clerk begins to sweat nervously*

[glossgender-deactivated20200405]

i’m going fucking crazy

[mjalti]

some “doctor” peoples who went to “medical school” and “understand the functionings of the human body”: Diet Coke isn’t good for you bc the chemicals destroy ur body

me: 🙄 okie dokie … quack…

user truewarrirorslight on page 48 of a forum I’m reading at 2:45 am: Diet Coke can interfere with how you develop ur psychic powers bc of the chemicals in it

me: yoooooo Diet Coke is Not Healthy!!!

[spooky-goose]

IM BACK FROM THE FUCKING DEAD

[a-trans-comic-by-me]

“Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep” – Mary Elizabeth Frye

Happy Pride 2019!

[scumfuckus]

rxplxcxng xll vxwxls wxþ x’s tx bx xnclxsxxxnxst whxlx xlsx rxplxcxng xll þ wxþ þx þxrn bxcxxxsx xts mxrx cxnvxnxxnt

[scumfuckus]

xm gxxng tx sxccxßfxlly fxck þx xnglxßh lxngxxgx bxyxnd sxlvxtxxn

[kidrat]

jxkxes xn yxx x rxxd hxmxstxck

[haletheprince-deactivated202208]

What the fuck is this

[lynati]

If you let your eyes glaze over ever so slightly, you can read it.

[mioxenoblade]

Banks don’t belong at pride. Corporations don’t belong at pride. Cops don’t belong and pride. Fascists don’t belong at pride. The forces that have abused us, oppressed us, have murdered our brothers and sisters do not get to take part in pride.

[isokuma]

Okay but some cops do. LGBT+ officers who are there not for work belong at pride-or those who are there to keep protesters from getting violent

[mioxenoblade]

This is a common misconception. The truth is: no cops belong at pride. Period.

[newdoges]

[wingkink]

Therapists are just…. Common sense filters

[wingkink]

Me: yeah so I just don’t have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so I just. Don’t

Her: why don’t you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together

Me:

Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You don’t have to make a sandwich.

Me:

Me: what

[cyanoticfallacy-deactivated2018]

Therapists finding loopholes for mental illness things is one of my favorite things about dealing with mental illness because it really helps me understand that just because a reaction is Common doesn’t mean it’s Right. Does doing dishes stress you out a lot? Buy paper plates. Do your obsessive thoughts make you worry about leaving your curling iron on so you drive home from work to check? Just put the curling iron in your purse and bring it to work with you while we work on tackling where this worry comes from. Symptom management doesn’t have to look like drudgery.

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

where is the big caesar’s

[geniusoflove]

under the toga

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

worst possible answer to this thank you so much

[wokeuplaughing]

POV of a beta fish at petsmart

[valtsv]

*tastes potion like a chef testing the soup* hm. needs more eye of newt.

[cool-art-i-didnt-do]

this is hilarious + its even funnier if u kno that eye of newt is probably mustard seed

[valtsv]

so who else was today years old when they learned that “eye of newt” is mustard seed and not the literal eye of a newt or am i just dumb

[tsunadadudi]

Theres even more beyond eye of newt

[aviculor]

no wonder my potions never work the way they should

[catboy-supremacist]

[linda-belcher]

This is the Dog of Protection.

Reblog and you’ll never be forced to reblog anything you don’t want to ever again!

[coyotewhiskey-deactivated201906]

heads up, terfs are flagging trans people’s blogs in the shinigami eyes extension – was going through comments on this post to block the fuckers and saw one of em comment as much, so unfortunately that’s a busted extension

[coyotewhiskey-deactivated201906]

in case op deletes the post, here’s the proof

[evilkaito]

okay so those “false marks” are client-sided, meaning they only show up to the people that report them, and no one else.

not until theyre approved by the people that actually run the extension are they officially flagged and it shows everyone your report.

no worries! the extension is working as intended, and a real person checks them.

[thelittlescrimshaw]

Me: wow I’m way too attached to fictional characters

Me: *sees y’all send death threats to writers because you didn’t agree with their decisions*

Me: never mind I’m attached the healthy amount

[unfortunatesun]

[moderndaywarriorsawyer]

The Money Tubbs only comes around every 5628 seconds. Reblog the Money Tubbs and you’ll find money!

[modelinterrupted]

Bitttchhh the last time I reblogged some bullshit like this I booked a 2k 30minute shoot lmao

[spencerthespacer-deactivated202]