Feed my nipples

Remember to aim right for the taint

[summercrane-deactivated20201109]

Visit Original Link

[yawnzshit]

glasses are the sluttiest thing a man could wear.

[hornetstabber]

What’s your thoughts on sexual relations with robots?

i turned this computer on like 5 minutes ago can i have a brief moment of peace before i have to read these things please

[mr-deep-downer]

you turned the computer on 😳

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I sneezed in class and it turned into one of those “who farted” sorts of interrogations and everyone was defending me because I was wearing a mask and that meant I didn’t have a nose.

[catchymemes]

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I was framed for the murder of a biblically accurate angel and in the middle of the court proceedings God came down from heaven and hit me over the head with a golf club and then I woke up in tears.

[zsnes]

grand wizard and his young apprentice

[zicygomar]

These guys look like some kinda Zelda merchants that sell you artichokes and pumpkins, respectively.

[ame-gosh]

[powerburial]

i can finally die in peace

[foreveriallyzombified]

a shy, pudgy white sixth grader wearing new balance sneakers who is dropped off and picked up from school every day by what is 100% undoubtedly, just based on obvious visual cues and context, 3-4 extremely serious yakuza thugs

[foreveriallyzombified]

[schizm-deactivated]

i dont bite people anymore. but i did as a child cos i thought i was a werepuppy. also i was still mormon so i would go into the school bathroom at 11:11 everyday (not a mormon thing i was just obsessed with witches n pretended i was one in 5th grade) and pray that god would turn me into a little dog so i could stop going to school. and i was always like "if you don't turn me into a little dog i will STOP BELIEVING IN YOU" and he didn't so i did.

[schizm-deactivated]

i think i even complained to my mom like "you said god will always answer my prayers but he hasn't turned me into a dog yet so??? bullshit" and she was like "oh honey 😊 god🌞 works in ✨mysterious✨ ways, and He🌞 knows whats best for you...turning you into a dog🐕 isnt the path🛣️ He🌞 has set for you🙏😚" and i was like. well that sucks i hate him

anyway im into petplay now

[thefiresontheheight]

[girlbossfranziskavonkarma]

just laughed hysterically at the gripping foods with force twitter account

[girlbossfranziskavonkarma]

_-#(#)@/($_+$()@)@)#)

[thesleepytimes]

It’s so good

[k-eke]

Be careful princess  🌸

[grotusrinocerose]

[heatandapathy]

I just love that multiple people not only though “the black one is a princess and those are her bodyguards” but also came to the conclusion “they’re also, obviously, samurai.”

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Hello ur name

[marzi-pan-dulce]

Fan fiction reader insert

[one-time-i-dreamt]

[wrenhavenriver]

Do you know why I live here, at the peak of the Monahven – what you name Throat of the World? No. Dragons like mountains, right? True.

[thetruequeenoftheabyss]

Can't wait for Eat Cookie with Markiplier

[dillyt]

well the horrors may be beyond YOUR comprehension, but I comprehend them perfectly

[wizard-email]

[techno-poet]

[jame7t]

*gets creampied evilly*

[inkthecryptid]

There’s something I gotta change about myself

[jame7t]

you’re too far gone

[weepingwidar]

John Brosio (American, 1967) - Two Earthlings (2003)

[marypsue]

#oh so this is one of those paintings where it’s actually the title that knocks you into next tuesday huh (via astriiformes)