Afsaane-Nigaar

Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead - Charles Bukowski

[stardustinme]

Upcoming Hurricane

Sometimes one lives a dream in real life and forgets to pay attention to red flags and one day everything crumbles down. They say when you lose respect you lose everything. Now i realise what they mean. The coming ruins threaten me, the fortellig of destruction shakes me..

[stardustinme]

Life as a wave

Sometimes you are at crest and then at trough and for the rest traversing between two. There are times when you forget to pay heed to anything and you roll; roll into spiral of nothingness, blur of little things, chatter of multiple voices, lost amongst many faceless faces in search of some face-filled appearances.

Then there are times when you are sensitive like a nipple in winter: to every tiniest stimulus, feeling, passage of time, dream, response, reflex and life. And for the rest you are traversing between these two. Just traversing. I think i have been there for quite some time now

[stardustinme]

First step - self care and pampering the family :) First attempt at dum biryani

[stardustinme]

Anger, Hurt and entitlement - the things to work on ..

[stardustinme]

The sense of loneliness and disconnect makes one feel unwanted. Life with anxiety and depression is already a difficult battle. When it gets marked by frequent futile attempts of connecting with people and finding oneself amongst situations where one is never invited or desired makes this battle unbearable. Only words that might comfort - is time and it's said power of healing.

[stardustinme]

This is what Shimla does to you !! Craziness and lovieess! #backhome #instatravel #himalayas #journey #valley #mountaingirl #pahadi #pahad #pahadlove #mountain #mountaincalling #himalayas #himachalcalling #himachalpradesh #gypsy #banjaaran #banjaarandiaries #inlove #craziness #belong #fun #mom #famjam (at Ridge,mall Road Shimla)

[stardustinme]

The before go ! The start of an end !

[stardustinme]

Such a simple yet tense day ! But nights like these; cozily in the corner of my little nest, All by myself with a pen, notepad, song and these warm lights are enough for me to feel belong, for atleast few minutes.

[stardustinme]

Well !

[stardustinme]

Sounds like home and hope! :)

[stardustinme]

I am, bloody, excited to start this book again. I ordered this when I was in media and communication school, 5 years back. A very good friend,at that time, used to tease me for not being able to complete it for almost a year. At that time I wasn't in a right maturity state to understate what Estes wrote in this book. I couldn't manage to even understand things clearly and hence took almost one and half year to get past 1/5 of the book. Taking it out again, makes me feel a bit nervous. What if I am,yet, not in a state to understand the hidden gems inside? But I think I might be able to grasp more this time. And more than before is always a good start ! Cheers to wild woman and the types !!!

[stardustinme]

So started cooking something new after a long time. Today's breakfast was onion and tomato uttapam! I aint a big of them, though!

[stardustinme]

After a Hiatus

Well, life has been quite unexpected for few months. Though that shouldn't be the reason to stop journaling here. Had many moments where I wanted to come and jolt down my tempestuous thoughts here but some or other way couldn't execute it. Again, I take this step of mindfulness and thoughtfulness for each waking hour. To capture and immediately put my wandering thoughts into this anchor ! Lets start with here and now !! " Here and Now" in past few months I have realised how important and critical way of life these words are! Here and Now !! Cheers to these three words !!! Here and now, I gulp you down !

[stardustinme]

. The Aztecs had a saying: ‘The earth is slippery, slick,’ which was as common to them as a contemporary aphorism such as ‘Don’t put all your eggs in one basket’ is to us. What they meant is that the Earth is a place where humans are prone to error, where our plans are likely to fail, and friendships are often betrayed. Good things only come mingled with something undesired. ‘The Earth is not a good place. It is not a place of joy, a place of contentment,’ a mother advises her daughter, in the record of a conversation that has survived to this day. ‘It is rather said that it is a place of joy-fatigue, of joy-pain.’

Aeon.in

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

When you can’t control what’s happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond to what’s happening. That’s where your power is.

Marc and Angel (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

[stardustinme]

A sign of ending

Everything ends, fades and closes. One such beautiful chapter is on its verge of closure. I am numb and empty because the beautiful moments are going to become memories forever. In need to mourn this closure so that I can open myself for more chapters..

[stardustinme]

मन

ख़ुद से लड़ता फिरता ये जग को ठोकर मारे, खींचें खींचे बैठें बैठे बैठे भागे ना सुनता ख़ुद के आगे ये पागल हो गया रे पाया जो ना चाहा चाहा जो ना पाया जिसके पीछे भागे वो साया है रे साया, उलझा उलझा रहता ना सुनता ना कुछ कहता सुनी सुनी आँखों से रह रह पानी बहता टूटे सारे नाते हारा मैं समझाके बिछड़े दिन और साथी फिर वापिस नहीं आते ठंडी आहें भर के जीता है मर मर के प्यासा रह गया है ये दरिया से गुज़र के धोके से ना सरके झोंके से उमड़ के रेत के महल सा ढह गया है बिखर के है ख़ुद से ही ख़फ़ा ख़फ़ा क्या चाहिए नहीं पता, बावरा! पाया वो ना चाहा चाहा वो ना पाया जिसके पीछे भागें वो साया है रे साया क्या क्या रास्ते ढूँढ़े क्या क्या दुःख ना पाया पर साया ठहरा साया की हाथों में ना आया । असीम अहमद अब्बासी