Just quickly popping in to say im not dead. Life has been crazy, iām currently living my dream of studying abroad and im gonna meet harry styles for the first time next friday for manchester ono. Stay safe, sending love to Iran, and i miss yall xx
tags ! @bvrnesher @lydiasfalling @hittmeandtellmeyouremine @dxstoeskyvjbess @pjxcksonswrd & everyone that wants
( pls let me know if you want to be removed ą«® . . ą¾ą½²į
warnings: cuss words, sexual innuendos, alcohol consumption
The sun creeps over the villa, golden light scattering across the pool and casting soft shadows through the trees. One by one, the islanders start to stir as the lights flicker on.
āMorning, guys.ā Abigail calls out, voice sweet but still groggy. A few murmured replies and a chorus of groans answer her back. From the far side of the room, JJās soft snores cut through the noise. He is still dead asleep, sprawled across the bed, completely ignoring the makeshift pillow wall Cleo had built between them.
āBro, seriously?ā Cleo grumbles, trying to shove him onto his side. Nothing. She pushes again. Still nothing. Topper snorts from across the room.
āHow is he still out cold?ā He laughs. All heads turn to JJ, mouth agape, drool at the corner of his lips, snoring like a freight train.
āAww, he looks so cute when he's sleeping.ā Sarah coos, hands clasped dramatically. Cleo rolls her eyes.
āYeah and he's a freaking menace when he's not.ā That gets a wave of laughter from the room.
Y/N chuckles, watching Cleoās struggle from her bed. But her focus drifts, her eyes falling to the arm slung over her leg. Rafeās still buried under a pillow, blocking out the sun. He hadnāt let go of her all night. Even now, half-asleep, his fingers rest on her thigh like heās anchoring himself to her.
She lets out a quiet breath, then glances to the other side of her bed. Ryanās already sitting up, hoodie on, hair wild, his glasses halfway down his nose. He turns to her with a sleepy grin.
āMorning.ā
āMorning.ā She replies, matching his smile. āHow was your first sleep in the villa?ā She asks, voice soft. He grins.
āHonestly? Best sleep Iāve had in ages.ā He replies and she laughs.
Her mind drifts back to her own first night. Struggling to sleep, tossing and turning and overthinking. Lying beside Rafe who made her feel safe enough to melt into him, even though they were practically strangers.
āY/N?ā
She blinks, pulled back to reality.
āYou zoned out there.ā Ryan says gently. āEverything alright?ā
āYeah.ā She says quickly, flashing a smile and looking down to fidget with her ring. āJust tired.ā
Ryan nods, but before he can say anything else, Abigail leans over to ask him something, giving Y/N space. She turns back toward Rafe just as he peeks out from under the pillow, rubbing his eyes. His tan chest rises with a slow breath and thereās a fresh stubble dusting his jaw. Somehow, it makes him look even more unfairly attractive. She swallows and looks away just as Kiaraās voice cuts through the room.
āWhat do you think Maddy and Kelce got up to in the Hideaway?ā Kiara asks and the room lights up with reactions as guesses start flying.
āThey definitely hooked up.ā Topper says, still half-asleep but already causing drama. Alyssa and Cleo immediately start arguing with him.
The door swings open before the debate gets too heated and Maddy walks in, glowing, with Kelce trailing behind her in nothing but boxers and a smug grin.
āMorning, lovebirds!ā Kelce yells, doing a lap around the room before throwing himself on Rafe and Y/Nās bed.
āDude!ā Rafe groans. Y/N grins and glances at Maddy, whoās laughing along with the others.
āSomeoneās in a good mood.ā She mutters.
Kelce beams. The girls all turn to Maddy, whoās sitting on her bed, eyes on her nails, a soft smile still lingering on her lips.
āSomeoneās in a good mood.ā Y/N mutters. Kelce beams, nodding like a bobblehead. The girls immediately zero in on Maddy, eyes wide with curiosity.
āSpill!ā Kiara demands.
āYouāre gonna tell us either way.ā Topper adds and everyone murmurs their agreement.
āGuys, donāt pressure them.ā Y/N cuts in, voice quieter.
Rafe hears it and wonders if itās a jab, leftover tension from their argument the night before. Kelce, catching her tone, reaches out and gently taps her calf.
āYou good?ā He murmurs, reading her a little too well. She gives him a small smile and a quick nod. Kelceās eyes flick to Rafe and he picks up on the tension between the two. He gets up from the bed, brushing off Rafeās legs and claps his hands.
āI need coffee injected in my veins. Boys, come on!ā He heads toward the door with a dramatic stretch. āDamn, itās a good day!ā He yells, making the others crack up as they follow him.
Rafe lingers for a beat, grabbing his phone and water. He looks down at Y/N.
āWeāre gonna talk later, yeah?ā
Thereās something hesitant in his voice. Hope, but also worry.
She meets his eyes and nods softly.
He leans down, presses a kiss to her forehead and follows the others out.
Once the boys leave the room, the girls immediately pile into Y/Nās bed. Sarahās the first to cling to her, adjusting her sunglasses. Maddy flops onto the bed with a giddy squeal, beckoning Abigail to scoot closer.
āOkay, spill!ā Alyssa practically begs.
āOkay, soā¦ā Maddy begins, clearly enjoying the attention.
āWhat did you two do?ā Sarah grins.
āJJās convinced you guys hooked up.ā Cleo throws in with a smirk.
āGirls, let her talk!ā Y/N interjects, rolling her eyes playfully.
āThank you, Y/N.ā Maddy says, clearing her throat. āSo, first of all, the hideaway? Gorgeous. Hearts everywhere and the bed? Huge and insanely soft.ā
The girls murmur excitedly as she continues.
āAnyway, we talked a lot. Just figuring out how compatible we actually are. And Iām really glad we did, because weāre totally on the same page.ā She pauses, her voice softening. āAndā¦we talked about you.ā
Maddy turns to Y/N, whose brows furrow.
āMe?ā Y/N repeats, caught off guard. āWait, what? Why?ā
Maddy chews her lip, choosing her words carefully.
āIt wasnāt anything bad. Kelce just noticed how close we are. He told me he still cares about you, probably always will, even if youāre part of his past. He just wanted to make sure things between us were cool before him and I got more serious. He doesnāt want you to get hurt. And honestly, I get that and I don't want that either. Soā¦are we good? I want you to be honest. If youāre not okay with it, Iāll back off, I mean it-ā
āMaddy.ā Y/N interrupts gently. āDonāt be ridiculous. Youāre my friend. I want you to be happy. Yeah, I care about Kelce, I donāt want him getting hurt either, but Iām moving on. He should too. If what you two have is real, then Iām all for it. Trust me.ā
Maddy nods, then pulls Y/N into a grateful hug.
āThank you, thank you, thank you.ā She murmurs as the other girls smile.
āOkay but did anything happen?ā Cleo asks impatiently, needing her gossip fix. The girls laugh as Maddy pulls back.
āLetās just sayā¦the salon opened.ā Her smirk says it all and the girls gasp.
āThe what?ā Abigail asks, confused. Cleo points to her own shorts. Abigailās eyes widen.
āOh!ā
āWait, yours or his?ā Kiara chimes in.
āBoth.ā Maddy mumbles, reaching for her water bottle as the girls erupt in squeals, shaking her from excitement.
āWhat kind of service did you get?ā Cleo teases. Maddy giggles, blushing.
āJustā¦a really nice mani.ā She reveals and the girls scream again, laughing.
āGenuinely so happy you got some.ā Sarah grins and they all laugh again.
āAlright, what did I miss?ā Maddy claps her hands, calming them down. All eyes turn to Y/N. She exhales.
āNothingās really changed with Rafe and I's situation. Last night, before bed, he said he wanted to talk today. Thatās it.ā
The girls give her quiet, sympathetic looks.
āI hate to ask butā¦are you okay?ā Maddy says gently. Y/N shrugs.
āI donāt know. Things were going so well and nowā¦Iām just confused.ā She absentmindedly fiddles with her ring.
āItās not your fault.ā Cleo says firmly. āEven if your talk triggered something, itās on him for not being honest.ā
āItās not only about honesty.ā Y/N says softly. āHe wasnāt ready to open up and I get that, I-ā
āDonāt make excuses for him.ā Kiara cuts in. āYouāre allowed to be understanding, but that doesnāt mean he gets to walk away or lash out at you.ā
The girls nod in agreement.
āCan we not talk about me for once?ā Y/N pleads. āI feel like Iām always the topic and itās exhausting.ā
āWeāre just worried.ā Sarah says, rubbing her back.
āYeah, I know, but-ā
āDonāt you dare say āitās fine,ā I will literally kick your ass.ā Cleo warns. Y/N chuckles, hands up in mock surrender.
āOkay, I wonāt.ā She grins. āBut it is gonna be fine.ā She quickly hides behind Sarah to dodge Cleo and the girls break into laughter as she pretends to launch herself over.
Once things settle, Y/N clears her throat.
āHey, Kieā¦Iāve been meaning to ask aboutā¦you and Pope.ā
Kiara shifts uncomfortably.
āLast night, when he suggested the hideaway, it kinda looked like you wanted to run.ā
The girls all turn to Kiara, waiting. She sighs.
āIām gonna be honest with y'all, Iām not feeling it. Heās cute, heās smart, sure. But heās justā¦not my type. Iāve tried, but every conversation feels awkward.ā
āHave you talked to him?ā Y/N asks, but Sarah quickly grabs her arm.
āWait, have you guys even kissed?ā Sarah asks. Kiara hesitates.
āWe had a peck. Butā¦ā She makes a face.
āOh, Kie.ā Maddy says sympathetically.
āYou really havenāt told him?ā Cleo asks.
āNot yet. I havenāt found the right time. And I donāt know how to say it.ā
āYou should do it soon.ā Cleo urges. āYouāve been coupled up for a while and Pope seems into you. He deserves the chance to meet someone who actually connects with him.ā
āLike you, babe?ā Maddy teases, drawing a few giggles. Cleo blushes.
āNo! Stop.ā
āYou like him!ā Sarah shouts, setting off a round of gasps.
āNo, I donāt.ā Cleo says, arms crossed.
āYou totally do!ā Maddy sings. āCleo and Pope, sitting in a tree-ā
āFinish that and Iāll end you.ā Cleo threatens and Maddy pretends to zip her lips.
āCome on.ā Y/N grins. āItās cute.ā
āI donāt have a crush on him!ā
āCleo-ā
āIām just confused, alright?ā She finally says. āThere was nothing with John B, Kelce and I had no chemistry and JJā¦please. But Popeā¦we have had a few chats and he gets me. Like, really gets me.ā
The girls stay quiet, letting her talk.
āI justā¦I see the way he looks at Kiara. He really likes her. And I donāt want to be his second choice.ā
Silence lingers for a moment.
āIāll talk to him.ā Kiara says at last. āBut you should too.ā
āOkay.ā Cleo nods slowly.
The girls smile at the honest moment, the tension melting just a little.
Meanwhile, outside, after Kelceās loud bragging session with the boys about āhis girlā and his night with Maddy, Rafe and Topper head to the kitchen. While Topper casually whisks eggs, Rafe finishes plating the avocado toast he just made.
āForgiveness avocado toast?ā Topper teases, raising an eyebrow. āWhat even happened last night? It feels like I missed an entire season.ā
Rafe lets out a heavy sigh.
āWe got into it. There was this talk with John B, JJ and Sarahā¦about exes. And I justā¦I donāt talk about my past. She tried to comfort me or get me to open up and I snapped. Likeā¦full-on snapped at her. And I hate myself for it. She was just trying to help and I shut down.ā
Topper nods, quiet for a beat.
āMaybeā¦talking to her, actually opening up, might help. Not just about the fight. About everything.ā Topper tries as Rafe rubs the back of his neck.
āYeah, except if I do that, she might actually hate me.ā
āIt canāt be that bad, dude. Everyoneās got baggage.ā Topper says, narrowing his eyes. Rafe leans in closer and drops his voice.
āI cheated on my ex.ā
Topper freezes at the confession.
āWhat?ā
āIt was a dumb mistake. One I regret every day. But if Y/N finds out...sheās not gonna look at me the same.ā Rafe explains while Topper stares, trying to process.
āDamn. I donāt even know what to say. Thatāsā¦a lot. But I still think you should talk to her. Sheās understanding. She might not get your side, but sheāll listen. Thatās gotta be something.ā
Rafe exhales slowly and grabs the plate and a glass of orange juice.
āYeah, Iā¦Iāll try. Thanks, man.ā
āAnytime.ā Topper gives him a light shoulder tap as Rafe heads toward the bedroom.
He carefully pushes the door open. The room falls quiet. Every girl turns to see who entered. Y/Nās face drops the moment she sees him.
āLadies.ā Rafe offers a small, respectful nod. He makes his way to Y/N and hands her the plate, setting the juice on her nightstand.
āI know you donāt usually eat breakfast ācause it makes you nauseous.ā He says softly. āBut I made you avocado toast. Extra crunchy, just how you like it. And the juiceā¦no pulp.ā
The girls blink at him in awe.
āI think Iām in love with you.ā Maddy whispers, earning an elbow from Kiara.
Rafeās eyes never leave Y/Nās. She stares back, stunned, her heart pounding. Sarah nudges her, trying to prompt a response.
Y/N still frozen in place, Sarah reaches over and steals a bite.
āJust gonnaā¦try this.ā She announces, chewing dramatically. Y/N finally blinks and shifts her gaze.
āThank you.ā She murmurs. She sets the plate aside and reaches with one arm, offering an awkward hug. Rafe leans in to accept it.
āAnytime.ā He whispers, his hand brushing her arm before he pulls away. āIāll see you later.ā
She nods and he walks out without looking back. The moment the door closes, the girls erupt.
āIām still kinda mad at him.ā Cleo admits. āBut that wasā¦really sweet.ā
āRight?ā Kiara nods, glancing at Y/N, whoās still staring at the door. Sarah leans forward.
āSoā¦what are you gonna say to him?ā Sarah asks, making Y/N tear her eyes away.
āI thinkā¦I want him to apologize. Properly. First.ā
āExactly!ā Kiara chimes in, arms crossed. Y/N sighs.
āI like him. A lot. And I know things are moving fast, but what weāve built alreadyā¦itās real. And now Iām stuck between being angry and completely floored that he made me breakfast with everything exactly how I like it.ā She groans, rubbing her forehead.
āIāll marry him myself if you donāt.ā Maddy says, making the girls laugh. Abigail looks sheepish.
āOkay, I donāt know the whole situation and I know itās messy, but...can I have a bite? That looks insane.ā She points to the plate. Y/N chuckles and cuts a piece for herself before passing it over. Soon, the plate is in the middle of the bed and all the girls are groaning and moaning over how good it tastes.
āOkay, this toast slaps.ā Cleo says, avocado smeared at the corner of her lips.
āDamn you, Rafe Cameron!ā Kiara shouts dramatically at the ceiling, sending everyone into laughter.
A little later, the girls are out in their bikinis, lounging around the villa, chatting with the boys and cooling off in the pool. Topper is in the middle of a conversation with Kelce when Y/N strolls past, heading toward the couch where Maddy is painting Kiaraās nails.
Topper lets out a low whistle.
āY/N?ā He calls. She glances over her shoulder, offering a smile and a wave.
āHey. You boys doing okay?ā She asks, sipping from her water bottle. Topper nods, gesturing for her to come over.
āDo youā¦wanna talk for a minute?ā He asks. Y/N glances back at the girls, then shrugs and walks toward the pool steps. Kelce reaches out to steady her as she makes her way down and settles into one of the pool chairs. Carefully, she adjusts her mic to keep it dry and places her bottle on the poolās edge.
āEverything okay?ā She asks, scanning their faces. Topper nods in response.
āYeah. I justā¦wanted to check in. How are you holding up?ā He asks, crossing his arms curiously.
āWhat did he tell you?ā She smirks, her eyes narrowing slightly, amused.
āDude, I told you sheād see right through us.ā Kelce exclaims, hitting Topper's shoulder while grinning. Y/N gasps dramatically.
āWere you two trying to ambush me right now?ā
Topper chuckles, raising his hands in defense.
āNo ambush. I justā¦I hate seeing you both like this. Heās like a brother to me and youāre honestly the sweetest girl here. Watching you guys upset like that over a situation that could easily be fixed. It sucks.ā
Y/N drops her gaze to her hands.
āI tried, Top. I really did. And he still pushed me away.ā
Topper sighs, exchanging a look with Kelce.
āWe know.ā Kelce says. āBut you two have unreal chemistry. Everyone sees it. Donāt let it go to waste overā¦whatever this is. You're both being stubborn about it.ā
āIām not being stubborn.ā She mutters, crossing her arms. Kelce shrugs.
āOkay, maybe not. But you both care. A lot. And this is not worth losing what you have.ā
She leans back with a frustrated sigh.
āI like him.ā She murmurs. āAnd I hate this. All of it. Likeā¦it didnāt have to go down like that. If I hadnāt been so pushy or-orā¦needy or if he was more open to talking about it, maybe itād be different.ā
Her eyes land on the ring on her finger. She turns it slowly, lost in thought.
Before either of them can answer, a shadow looms behind her, someone approaching. Topper and Kelce glance up, Y/N still unaware, lost in her thoughts.
āIs now a good time to talk?ā Rafe's deep voice cuts through the noise, making her stomach twist. She glances at the boys, who smirk like this was part of some master plan. Ignoring them, she looks back at Rafe and gives a small nod.
She stands, grabbing her mic pack and water bottle, then follows him over to one of the couches tucked away from the rest of the group. As they sit, Rafe clears his throat and pulls off his sunglasses, finally meeting her eyes.
āFirst offā¦I just want to say I'm sorry.ā He begins. āI was acting stupid. Immature.ā
She doesn't respond, just stares down at the pillow in her lap.
āY/Nā¦ā His voice falters. āCan you look at me?ā
She turns, meets his gaze and exhales slowly.
āI really like you.ā He says, softer now. āAnd I know I messed up. But youāve gotta understand, my last relationship isā¦it was tough on me. And Iāve never really talked about it with anyone before and maybe thatās why I handled all of this so badly.ā
He pauses, searching her face.
āIām not saying that makes it okay. I just...I want to move past this. Can we? Can we just try again?ā
Her eyes search his face, flickering with hurt, confusion, and something dangerously close to resignation. Then she slowly shakes her head.
āIām not just going to move on and pretend this didnāt happen.ā She says quietly, voice tight but steady.
āI know I pushed about your ex. I get that itās a sore spot and maybe I shouldnāt have gone there. But, Rafeā¦ā She pauses, the words catching in her throat, āI want you to feel safe with me. I want to be someone you can talk to. Someone you trust.ā
āY/N-ā
āLet me finish.ā She holds up her manicured hand and he nods, lips pressing into a thin line as he falls silent.
āWeāre in here trying to build something real. And real doesnāt mean shutting people out when it gets hard. I was there for you, Rafe. Last night, I was right there trying to understand you and you left me in the dark. And it's not the first time either.ā
Rafe exhales, like he was holding his breath the whole time, the weight of guilt visible in the way his shoulders slump.
āI know. I know you were. And I appreciate it. I do. I justā¦I canāt talk about it. Itās off-limits.ā
āYou said you wouldnāt shut me out again.ā She reminds him and her voice breaks slightly.
āI know.ā He says softly. āAnd I promise I won't do that again."
She looks down at her hands, fidgeting with the strap of her water bottle. She shakes her head, the gesture slow, like the words physically sting.
āHow am I supposed to believe you when I donāt even know if youāre being honest with me now?" She asks, obviously hurt. Rafe has no answer. He stares at her like he wishes he could take it all back, but knows he canāt.
āI donāt want to fight.ā She whispers. āBut I donāt want to feel like Iām the only one fighting for this either.ā
She gets up, sighing as she pushes herself off the couch, her voice barely audible now and she starts to walk away.
āI cheated on her.ā
Her feet stop mid-step. The words hang in the air like a crack of thunder. Slowly, she turns back, eyebrows drawn tight.
āWhat?ā She asks. Rafe leans forward, elbows on his knees, rubbing at his face. He canāt look at her.
āMy ex. I got drunk at a party and ended up in someone elseās bed. I was stupid. I ruined everything. Andā¦fuck, I donāt even remember most of it. But it happened. And I hated myself for it." He finally looks up at her, eyes glassy.
āI didnāt tell you because I didnāt want you to think less of me. T-to see me as that version of myself. Because Iām not him anymore. I swear Iām not.ā
Y/N just stares. Still, silent, stunned.
āCan you please say something?ā He asks, voice raw. She blinks, like sheās trying to shake herself out of it.
āWhat the fuck?ā
āY/N-ā
āHow could you do that to someone?ā She snaps, her voice rising with emotion. āWhy?ā
āI was messed up. I wasnāt thinking. Iāve done the work, Iāve taken responsibility, but itās not who I am anymore. I swear.ā
He reaches for her hand, but she pulls away like heās burned her.
āI donāt know what to say.ā She whispers. āI justā¦I need time. I need to process this.ā
āY/Nā¦ā
But sheās already turned. And this time, she doesnāt stop.
Rafe stays frozen on the couch, the space she left behind feeling emptier than he thought possible. All thatās left is the echo of her disgust and the ache in his chest where her trust used to be.
Y/N makes her way over to Sarah, whoās chatting with Abigail and Maddy. One look at her and Sarahās smile drops instantly.
āHey, hey. Whatās going on?ā She asks, noticing Y/Nās trembling hands and the shaken look on her face. Y/N sinks into the seat beside them, still clearly reeling.
āWeā¦talked.ā She replies, voice low. āHeā¦fuck.ā Her fingers thread anxiously through her hair.
āWhat happened, Y/N/N?ā Maddy asks gently, placing a comforting hand on her back.
āHe told me about his ex.ā She finally says.
āThatāsā¦good, right?ā Abigail offers carefully. āI mean, youāve been wanting him to open up.ā
The girls watch her, waiting, unsure.
āHe told meā¦ā Y/N pauses, trying to find the words. āHe told me he cheated on her.ā
Their eyes widen in unison, a heavy silence settling in.
āWhat?ā Sarah blurts, brows furrowing. Y/N just nods.
āYeah. That was my reaction too.ā She says with a bitter laugh.
āOh my god. What did you say?ā Maddy asks, her voice soft with concern.
āI told him I need time to process. He kept saying how much he regrets it, how much he hates himself for it, how he has changed, butā¦I donāt even know what to think.ā
Sarah wraps an arm around her, rubbing her back.
āItās a lot. You donāt have to figure it all out right now.ā
Y/N doesnāt respond, just stares down at the floor, her mind clearly miles away.
āIām justā¦I donāt know how to feel about this. Or-or what I should do. Iā¦I amā¦itās so confusing.ā She leans back into the couch, letting her head fall against the cushion with a frustrated sigh.
The girls exchange glances, quiet and gentle in their support. Maddy offers a soft smile and pats her thigh.
āWeāre here, okay?ā Sarah says. āWhatever you need.ā
Y/N nods faintly, lips pressed into a thin line, still lost in thought.
Later that afternoon, the girls are getting ready upstairs while Rafe, Topper and Kelce are in the bedroom.
āI told her.ā Rafe says, pulling a pair of jeans from his closet.
āTold her what?ā Topper asks, reaching for his deodorant.
āAbout my ex.ā Rafe replies. āThat I cheated on her.ā
Kelceās head snaps up.
āWait-what?ā He asks, his brows furrowing. Rafe exhales, pulling on his jeans.
āYeah. Thatās why I didnāt say anything last night. I knew it would hit her hard. And the way she looked at meā¦fuck, man.ā
āAre you being serious right now?ā Kelce says, staring at him.
āDo I look like Iām joking?ā Rafe asks as he shoots him a look.
Kelce shakes his head slowly.
āDudeā¦you shouldāve told her from the start. Trust is a huge thing for her. I mean, obviously.ā
āObviously?ā Rafe repeats, eyebrows knitting together. āWhatās that supposed to mean?ā
Kelce turns off the iron, hesitating.
āShe didnāt tell you?ā He asks. Rafe glances between them, confused.
āTell me what?ā
āI donāt know if itās my place, butā¦ā Kelce pauses. āBefore she and I got together, she was with this guy. Real piece of shit. Untrustworthy as hell. One day, she caught him in her bed with a girl she worked with.ā
Rafe freezes, mouth slightly open.
āShit.ā He mutters, rubbing a hand over his buzzed head. āShe never told me that. No wonder she was so upset.ā
āThat, plus being paired with someone whoās done the same thing?ā Topper adds and Rafe scoffs.
āIām not that guy anymore. I told her I regret it. Every bit of it.ā
Kelce carefully slips on his shirt so as to not wrinkle it.
āLook, man. Let her have some time. Then talk to her, like really talk. No yelling. No ego. No stubbornness. Justā¦be honest. Let it be a conversation, not a war.ā
Rafe nods slowly, eyes drifting to the bed heās been sharing with her.
āYeah.ā He murmurs. āI will.ā
As the islanders share laughs and drinks, Y/N and Cleo sit by the firepit, able to observe the rest of the group from a distance. JJ is walking on his hands, slowly making his way toward the pool without realizing it. Everyone watches in anticipation, waiting for the inevitable and when he finally topples in with a loud splash, laughter erupts all around. He emerges from the water, yelling and cussing them out as they double over.
Y/N chuckles and turns to Cleo, whoās clearly zoned out. Her eyes glued to Pope, whoās mid push-up competition with Topper. It doesnāt last long though as Pope gives out quickly and Sarah, being the sweetheart she is, immediately goes to comfort him. Y/N snaps her fingers in front of Cleoās face.
āGirl.ā She snaps again, finally catching her attention. Cleo blinks and turns to her.
āDonāt. Please. Donāt start.ā Cleo warns.
āDude.ā Y/N pauses. āJust go for it.ā
Cleo scoffs and shakes her head.
āHeās into Kiara.ā She mutters, adjusting her skirt. Y/N gently grabs her hand, not letting her look away again.
āYouāre wasting time by not giving it a chance.ā She pauses. āCleo, youāre so gorgeous and so kind-hearted and smartā¦itāsā¦you like him. And I know that may scare you or maybe you're scared of getting rejected, but it doesnāt hurt to try.ā
Cleo looks up at her.
āHo, are you a mind reader or something?ā Cleo asks, narrowing her eyes playfully.
Y/N bursts out laughing, giving her a light slap on the thigh.
āIām just sayingā¦have a chat with him. Youāre here to explore connections and hopefully find the right one. Maybe Pope is it.ā
Cleo hesitates.
āBut⦠what about Kiaraā¦she-ā
āShe said sheād talk to him first. I know.ā Y/N nods. āBut I donāt think you should wait anymore. Plus, you know how Kie feels. Itās not like youāre stepping on anyoneās toes.ā
Without warning, Cleo wraps her arms around Y/N in a tight hug, catching her completely off guard.
āI love you, little one.ā She mumbles against her shoulder.
āI love you too, C.ā Y/N says, hugging her back. Cleo pulls away and stands, adjusting her skirt again.
āWish me luck.ā She says lowly.
āYou donāt need it.ā Y/N smiles, standing and giving her a little push forward.
Cleo stumbles slightly before making her way toward the beanbags, where Pope is lounging with John B and Sarah.
āHey.ā She says, approaching with a soft smile. Everyone greets her with wide grins.
āPope, do youā¦do you mind going for a chat?ā She asks, glancing briefly at Sarah, who smirks knowingly.
āYeah, sure.ā Pope says, getting up and dapping John B before following Cleo to the couch under the terrace.
As they sit down, Cleo adjusts her skirt, smoothing the fabric across her legs.
āYou look nice, by the way.ā Pope says, nodding toward her. āThat color really works on you.ā
āThanks. Itās Maddyās, actually.ā She glances down, smiling faintly. He nods.
āStill. It looks good. I mean, you do. I mean, the skirt does too, justā¦yeah.ā He fumbles a little and she lets out a small laugh.
āHowāve you been finding it?ā Cleo asks, shifting the conversation. āYou know, the whole Love Island experience?ā
āYeah, itās been good so far?ā Pope shrugs and she raises an eyebrow.
āYouāre asking me?ā
He chuckles at her comment.
āNo, no, I mean, yeah. Itās beenā¦interesting.ā
Cleo nods.
āWhat about you?ā He asks and she sighs.
āDefinitely a rollercoaster. Between the couplings and JJās snoring-ā
āOh my god, that's him?ā Pope laughs, leaning back. āIt's been driving me insane.ā
āYouāre lucky youāre across the room. Iāve got him snoring right into my ear.ā
They both laugh and for a moment, things feel easy.
āI like this.ā Cleo says after a beat, her voice softer now. āThis?ā Pope looks over, brows furrowed slightly.
āYou. Us talking like this. You have thisā¦calming energy. I feel like I can just be myself around you.ā She swallows. āAnd Iāve been thinking about it and I justā¦Iām gonna say it. Iām attracted to you. And I donāt know if youāve felt anything too, but I wanted to see if maybe there could beā¦something.ā
Pope doesnāt respond right away. He just stares at her, lips parted slightly, blinking like he didnāt expect this.
āUsually this is the part where someone responds.ā Cleo lets out a nervous laugh.
āI'm sorry. I justā¦ā Pope finally says, shifting in his seat. āI didnāt really see this coming.ā
āOh.ā Her smile falters, just a little.
āNot thatā¦itās not bad. I justā¦ā He trails off, rubbing the back of his neck. āIt kind of caught me off guard.ā
āRight. Yeah. I get it.ā She nods slowly, looking away.
āIām sorry if thatāsā¦like, if this is weird now.ā He adds quickly.
āItās not weird.ā She says, though the words are a little too fast. āItās fine. I justā¦wanted to be honest.ā
They sit in silence again, but this time itās stiffer, more uncomfortable. Cleoās hands fidget in her lap. Pope stares at a spot on the ground.
āI should probably head back to the girls.ā Cleo says eventually, standing a little too quickly.
āYeah. Of course.ā Pope says, not quite meeting her eyes.
She gives him a tight smile and walks off, leaving Pope sitting there, still trying to make sense of what just happened.
In the kitchen, Y/N reaches into the fridge for another drink when Ryan strolls up beside her.
āHey, you.ā He says, flashing her a grin and finger guns before immediately shoving his hands behind his back. āSorry. I get weird around pretty girls.ā
She laughs under her breath.
āIāll let it slide since you called me pretty.ā She replies and he clutches his chest like heās been wounded in the best way.
āYou want anything while Iām here?ā She nods toward the fridge.
āA chat with you sounds ideal.ā He pauses, then adds. āOh, and maybe a soda? Since youāre offering.ā
She blushes, grabbing a can for him along with her own drink, then turns back to him.
āLead the way.ā She says.
Ryan leads her toward a couch tucked at the back of the villa. The same one where she and Rafe had their fight earlier. She hesitates for a beat before following.
āYou good?ā Ryan asks once they sit. āYou keep drifting off on me.ā
āYeah. Just got a lot on my mind.ā She blinks, grounding herself. He nods, letting the moment hang.
āThis about Rafe?ā He asks and her head snaps to him.
āDid he say something?ā
Ryan shakes his head.
āNo. Justā¦felt like something was going on.ā He replies, making her exhale and nod.
āGood instincts.ā She mutters and he smiles.
āMy instincts told me to come talk to you, so Iām gonna trust āem.ā He pauses. āBut hey, if you ever wanna talk about it-ā
āNo.ā She cuts in softly. āI wanna get to know you.ā
āWhat do you wanna know?ā He nods, settling more comfortably into the couch. She taps her lip, thinking, before her lips turn upright into a playful smirk.
āWhatās Sabrina like?ā She asks, making both of them chuckle.
āSheās very short. And super sweet.ā
āYeah, I figured.ā She chuckles again. āYou live in New York, right?ā She asks, switching gears.
āYeah. Been there a few years now. Love it. Really great job opportunities. What about you?ā
āIām from there.ā
He pauses.
āNo way. Thatās a sign.ā
They both smile, easing into easy conversation, until her phone buzzes. She glances down and her smile fades.
āShit.ā She mutters. āGuys, I got a text!ā
The villa falls quiet as they snap their attention towards her. Rafe looks up from across the yard, eyes locking on Y/N and Ryan sitting way too close for his comfort. His chest tightens.
āāIslanders, pucker up because tonight youāll be taking part in the Kissing Challenge. #kissandmakeup #hotandbotheredāā She reads the message aloud.
The group erupts in excitement. Y/N shoots Ryan an apologetic look before hurrying off to find the girls.
Across the yard, Topper claps a hand on Rafeās back with a smirk.
āWell, the text did say kiss and make up.ā
Rafe doesnāt respond. His eyes are still locked on her, determined to win her back.
warnings: cuss words, sexual innuendos, alcohol consumption
The sun rises over the villa and as the lights flicker on, a new day begins. Groans echo around the room as the islanders squint and shield their eyes from the brightness. Cleo gives JJ a shove as he's sprawled halfway over the pillow barrier. Sarah giggles as John B keeps her tucked against him and Kelce checks Maddy out as she gets up to grab her hoodie.
Rafe rubs the sleep from his eyes and turns to find Y/N curled up in a tight ball, eyes half-lidded and heavy. He frowns slightly and scoots closer.
āGood morning.ā He murmurs, voice still rough from sleep.
āMorning.ā She replies, voice faint and slow, like it took effort to speak.
āYou alright? Sleep okay?ā He asks, his tone gentle as he reaches over to rub her arm.
āYeah. Fine.ā Her answer is quick, almost mechanical. She sits up slowly, stretching a little before resting her head on Rafeās shoulder.
āYou sure?ā He whispers again. She gives a small nod, pulling her knees to her chest. Rafe doesnāt push, just wraps an arm around her and presses a kiss to her temple, before tuning into the conversation the guys are starting across the room.
Y/N fidgets with a loose thread on the blanket, half-listening as Sarah starts recounting a wild dream involving a tango-dancing surfer lobster. The room gradually wakes up as everyone begins getting ready for the day. The boys head outside for coffee and a workout while the girls make their way upstairs.
āSoā¦ā Cleo starts, rifling through her bikinis. āDid anyone kiss or cuddle their new matches last night?ā
Sarah lets out a sneaky giggle as she dabs on some concealer.
āIā¦well, John B and I cuddled. Andā¦I kissed him.ā
The room erupts with cheers. Well, most of it.
āOooh, how was it, girlie?ā Kiara grins.
āIt was sweet. Soft. Really cute.ā Sarah beams as the others nod approvingly. Maddy ties her bikini top and steps over to the mirror.
āAnd you, Miss Maddy?ā Kiara smacks her lightly on the butt. Maddy laughs and swats her hand away.
āWe just cuddled. He said he didnāt wanna rush things.ā
āAww!ā the girls chorus.
āIf a guy told me that, Iād jump his bones.ā Alyssa adds, making everyone laugh.
āNo, really, it was sweet. I liked that.ā Maddy says with a soft smile. āButā¦I did hear giggling from your bed, Alyā¦ā
Alyssa smirks.
āTopperās got jokes. What can I say?ā Her raised eyebrow says more than her words.
āAre we talking about the same Topper?ā Kiara furrows her brows.
āJust spill already!ā Sarah exclaims, leaning in.
āWe just cuddled.ā Alyssa insists, hands up. āI swear.ā
āBoooring!ā Cleo teases and laughter fills the room. Y/N smiles faintly as she braids her hair, though something in her expression is dimmer than usual. It doesnāt go unnoticed.
āY/N, honey, you okay?ā Sarah asks gently. The others pause and glance her way. The room stills a little. Y/N pauses mid-braid. She nods after a beat, her expression unreadable.
āDid something happen?ā Kiara probes.
āIf Rafe did something again, I swear-ā Cleo starts, already rolling up her sleeves.
āNo, nothing happened.ā Y/N interrupts, her tone clipped. āRafe and I are fine.ā She replies, rifling through her makeup bag. Sarah leans closer across the vanity, taking Y/Nās hand.
āWeāre just worried, thatās all.ā
Y/N takes a breath and nods, still not looking up.
āThanks. I justā¦had a bad dream, thatās all.ā
The girls nod in understanding, the energy in the room softening.
āDo you wanna talk about it?ā Maddy offers softly.
āNot right now.ā She shakes her head. The girls respect that, gently changing the subject as they go back to getting ready for the day.
Most of the girls are ready. Alyssa and Kiara have already headed downstairs, while the rest finish getting dressed, except for Y/N, whoās tearing through her wardrobe like it personally offended her.
āFuck off.ā She mutters, slamming the drawer shut.
āNo! I donāt!ā Y/N snaps, her voice louder than intended. The room falls silent for a beat. Her shoulders drop as she closes her eyes and pinches the bridge of her nose. āIām sorry. I didnāt mean to yell.ā
āItās fine.ā Cleo says gently. āWe all have bad days.ā The others nod in quiet agreement.
The other girls nod, exchanging glances. Y/N lowers herself into her seat with a frustrated sigh, pulling her jewelry box into her lap like a distraction. But Maddy notices the tremble in her hands.
āHey.ā She says softly, coming to stand beside her. āLetās just pause for a second, okay?ā She slowly slides the jewelry box out of Y/Nās grip and sets it aside.
āDo you want me to do your hair?ā Maddy offers, voice low and steady, like sheās speaking to glass. Y/N just nods, empty and detached.
Maddy gently unravels her half-finished braid and grabs the curling iron. Sarah kneels nearby, unsure whether to help or just stay close.
āWant a snack? Or something to drink?ā Sarah asks, crouching beside her. āSnacks always help me.ā
Y/N shakes her head, eyes locked on her own reflection. Her face crumples a moment later as tears begin to well.
āHey, hey.ā Cleoās beside her in a second, rubbing her back as Maddy sets the iron down and sits on the other side. Y/N bites her lip to hold back the sobs, but itās no use. She swipes at her face, trying to stop it.
āY/N-ā āIām fine.ā She cuts Maddy off, voice thick with tears.
āYou donāt have to lie to us. It's okay.ā Maddy says quietly, her hand resting on Y/Nās back.
Y/N tries to speak again but she canāt. She just shakes her head and gasps a little through the tightness in her chest.
āJustā¦can youā¦could you-ā
āWhat do you need?ā Sarah asks gently.
āCan you get Rafe?ā She whispers, finally looking up. Sarah nods and bolts downstairs without a word.
Rafeās in the kitchen, chatting with Pope as he makes coffee.
āYou okay?ā Pope asks as Sarah runs up.
āItās Y/N.ā Is all she says and thatās enough. Rafe drops the mug and rushes after her. He takes the stairs two at a time and swings open the makeup room door. His eyes go straight to her. Curled up, eyes red and hands trembling.
She hears the door and immediately stands. He meets her halfway, catching her as she collapses into his chest. Her fingers fist the front of his shirt like sheās anchoring herself to the only solid thing in the world.
He lifts her by the back of her thighs without a second thought, settling into her seat with her in his lap. Sarah gives Rafe a small nod before tugging Cleo and Maddy out, leaving the two of them alone.
Rafe holds her close, gently rocking her, murmuring quiet comforts. He doesnāt ask questions, just lets her cry.
āBreathe, baby. Iāve got you.ā He whispers. She clutches tighter, silent tears wetting his shirt.
They sit like that for several minutes, no rush, no pressure. Just her falling apart and him being the net that catches her.
When her sobs fade into sniffles, he cups her face, coaxing her to look at him.
āHey.ā He whispers.
āSorry.ā She mumbles, eyes dropping to his chest. He frowns.
āWhy are you apologizing?ā
āIām being dumb and emotional andā¦I ruined your shirt.ā She says, gesturing at the small makeup stain.
āI donāt care about the shirt. And youāre not dumb. You're allowed to feel like this.ā He says firmly. She hesitates, then looks down at her hand.
āMy ring...Iā¦My grandpa gave it to me. Iāve never taken it off. Itās stupid butā¦it meant everything.ā
He nods, brushing his thumb along her arm.
āItās not stupid. Weāll find it. I told you, Iāll tear the place apart if I have to.ā He says, trying to make her smile.
āThereās more.ā She says quietly. He nods again, waiting. āI had a dream. A bad one. Like, wake-up-sobbing bad. And I guess with the homesickness a-and the ring and everything elseā¦it just hit me.ā
āHey.ā He says again, gently. āIt's okay to feel like this. But you're gonna be alright. You-We're gonna get through this.ā
She looks down, fidgeting with his fingers. Her thumb finds the ring he wears and she clings to it.
āThanks.ā She whispers. He nods, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.
āAnd Iām sorry I look like such a mess.ā She adds with a tired smile.
āYouāre beautiful. Always.ā He replies without missing a beat. Her smile widens and she leans in to kiss him.
āYou know, Iā¦I just needed to see you.ā She confesses. His brows pinch slightly.
āWhat do you mean?ā He asks, confused.
āI meanā¦my chest was closing in and I felt the flood coming and all I could think wasā¦I need Rafe. I needed you to help me calm down.ā
His expression softens completely.
āYou can always come to me.ā He says. āAlways. Iāve got you.ā
She nods, her eyes welling again, but this time, not with panic.
Then Rafe sniffs the air, nose crinkling.
āIs something burning?ā He asks, making Y/Nās eyes go wide.
āOh my God!ā She lunges to turn off the curling iron. He chuckles as she frantically checks it. She starts laughing too.
āAlmost burned down the whole villa.ā She says through a laugh. They sit together for a while longer, the energy slowly shifting back to calm.
āAs much as I love seeing you in my hoodie.ā He says, tugging at the hem. āWe should get you ready for the day. Plus, you in a bikini? Iā¦ā Rafe bites his lip making Y/N snort.
āWanna help me pick one?ā
āOh, God, yes.ā He grins, jumping up like itās the most important mission heās ever had.
Hours later, Y/N and Rafe are sprawled out on one of the couches with JJ, Sarah and John B. Y/N is curled up beside Rafe, still in the white bikini he picked out for her earlier, her hair thrown messily into a claw clip. She sips on a glass of juice, her skin warm and glowing, a lot more herself than she had been earlier. The conversation drifts into old relationships, always a dangerous road.
āMy last ex, Ted, broke up with me over text. On my fucking birthday.ā Sarah says suddenly, almost laughing, but thereās a bite under it. Y/N's mouth drops open as the boys furrow their brows, thrown off.
āShut up.ā Y/N blurts, genuinely shocked. āWhat a dick!ā
JJ, ever the clown, pitches his voice high to mock them. āOh my god, totally!ā
āHow long were you two even together?ā She asks, still processing it.
āLikeā¦seven months?ā Sarah says, almost casual, but there's something tight around her eyes.
āWhat did he even say?ā John B asks, half-joking, trying to lighten it. āāHappy Birthday, your present is Iām dumping youā?ā
āSomething close.ā Sarah says with a dry laugh. āIt was like, āHey, hope youāre good. Youāre awesome, but Iām not in the right place for a relationship. Also, happy birthday.āā She shakes her head, laughing at the memory now, but itās brittle. Y/N reaches over instinctively, rubbing Sarahās arm with soft sympathy.
āOh, honeyā¦ā She says, low and real. Sarah waves her off with a little smile.
āIām over it, seriously. Someone else go.ā She looks around the group. Thereās a beat of quiet. Y/N shrugs.
āYāall know about my ex, soā¦ā She trails off, taking a long sip from her drink. JJ fidgets, glancing at his flip flops. The shift in his energy is obvious.
āIā¦uhhā¦ā He hesitates, then forces it out āMy ex cheated on me.ā
The group falls silent, all eyes snapping to him.
āOh, Jā¦ā Y/Nās voice is soft, sad. He flinches.
āDonāt. Please. I donāt wantā¦ā He glances around, eyes flashing. āI donāt want pity. Itās justā¦it happened. It sucked, but whatever. Iām good.ā He crosses his arms, the words stiff and defensive. John B catches the girlsā eyes and with a small nod, steers the conversation away.
āWhat about you, Rafe?ā He asks lightly.
Rafe shifts, adjusting his sunglasses.
āUhhā¦it was like a year ago?ā He says, almost like heās guessing. Sarah leans in, curious.
āWhat happened?ā
Y/N turns toward him too, heart thudding a little. Rafe hadnāt said anything about his exes before inside the villa, not to her, not to anyone.
āNothing.ā Rafe says flatly, eyes flicking away. āJust fell apart, I guess.ā He stares down at Y/Nās half-empty glass instead of meeting anyoneās eyes. āWant a refill?ā He asks, nodding at it. Y/N shakes her head.
āNo, Iām good.ā She hesitates, watching him. His jaw is tight, his body stiff. āAre you?ā She asks, her voice dropping low. Rafeās brows pull together.
āWhy wouldnāt I be?ā He snaps, too fast. Y/N reaches out, brushing his bicep gently. He stiffens under her touch.
āI donāt know. You just seem...tense. I thought maybe all this talk was bringing back...bad memories or something.ā
āI said Iām fine.ā Rafe snaps, sharper this time.Y/Nās hand drops immediately. She draws back, hurt flashing across her face.
āSorry.ā She mumbles, her voice small, and turns back to Sarah, whoās already jumping into another ex story, trying to salvage the easy mood. Rafe exhales harshly and stands up without a word, striding toward the kitchen.
āWhatās up with him?ā Sarah whispers, glancing after him. Y/N watches him crack open the fridge, pulling out stuff for a protein shake like heās desperate for something to do with his hands.
āI...I donāt know.ā She says quietly. āMaybe all of this hit a nerve.ā
The others fall back into banter, but Y/N keeps sneaking glances toward Rafe. He's sitting now with Topper and Kelce, but even from here, Y/N can see the way his shoulders are tense, the way he keeps fidgeting, jaw tight.
Night falls quickly over the villa and the islanders get ready for another party in their little paradise. Everyone heads outside, grabbing drinks and splitting into groups. Y/N settles with the girls around the beanbags, her eyes occasionally drifting across the yard where Rafe sits by the firepit, deep in conversation with Pope. They havenāt spoken since he stormed out of their conversation earlier.
āYouāre staring.ā Cleo sing-songs, bumping her elbow into Y/Nās side and nearly knocking her off the beanbag. Y/N blinks and looks back at the group.
āYou okay?ā Sarah asks gently. Y/N nods quickly.
āYeah, yeah. Justā¦ā She hesitates, picking at the edge of her cup. āI feel like heās avoiding me.ā
The girls exchange glances.
āWhat?ā Alyssa asks, clearly behind on the villa gossip.
āEarlier, everyone was talking about their exes and Rafe justā¦stormed out. Didnāt say anything, didnāt come back. Hasnāt said a word to Y/N since.ā Cleo explains. āCatch up, Aly.ā She snaps her fingers dramatically in front of Alyssaās face. Alyssa wrinkles her nose and turns her attention back to Y/N.
āMaybe he just doesnāt wanna talk about it?ā Alyssa suggests.
āI get that.ā Y/N says, voice soft. āBut he usuallyā¦I donāt know. He always compliments my dresses or asks which drink I want, even though theyāre all the same. He always says something.ā
The girls listen closely, their expressions thoughtful.
āI donāt think heās avoiding you.ā Maddy says. āI think that talk just stirred up some stuff for him. Heās probably just in his head. Give him some time.ā
The others nod in agreement.
āThat guy wonāt last another hour away from you.ā Kiara adds with a grin, making everyone laugh. Y/N smiles, feeling a little lighter. Cleo shifts, her tone careful.
āWhat about this morningā¦in the glam room? We didnāt get a chance to talk about it. Are you okay?ā
Y/N leans into her, nodding.
āI just got overwhelmed. Iām sorry for snapping at you.ā
āYou donāt have to apologize. I just got worried about you.ā Cleo says simply. Y/N smiles appreciative.
The conversation slowly shifts to Maddy and Kelce's connection, when a sudden ping cuts through the chatter. Everyoneās heads snap toward the firepit. Pope and Rafe stand frozen.
Pope fumbles for his phone, reading the screen before nearly spitting out his drink.
āI-I got a text!ā He calls out, drawing everyoneās attention. The girls scramble off the beanbags to gather around as he clears his throat.
āāIslanders, your group is about to grow tonight as two new bombshells are entering the villa. Please be on your best behavior for Abigail and Ryan and make them feel welcome. #thepartyisjuststarting #themorethebetter.āā
Gasps echo as everyone looks around, half in shock, half in excitement, until two new islanders stroll confidently through the flower-lined corridor.
āOh my god.ā Maddy breathes as Ryan and Abigail make their grand entrance, radiating the kind of energy that promises chaos.
The villa stirs as everyone rushes to greet them, the night suddenly feeling a whole lot less predictable.
The girls greet the newcomers with hugs, each introducing themselves with bright smiles. Sarah grabs two glasses and hands one to each of them. Ryanās eyes catch Y/N standing a little apart from the group and he makes his way over to her.
āHey, Iām Ryan.ā He says, offering his hand.
āY/N.ā She replies, shaking his hand with a shy smile, her cheeks flushing pink.
āPretty name for a pretty girl.ā Ryan says and then immediately winces at himself. āThat was awful, wasnāt it?ā He takes a quick sip of his drink, trying to recover. Y/N laughs, nodding.
āIt was really bad.ā She agrees and he grins, his teeth gleaming under the villa lights.
From across the patio, Rafe watches the exchange, jaw tightening. In a few strides, heās at Y/Nās side, casually slipping an arm around her waist possessively.
āHey, man. Rafe.ā He says, sticking out his hand.
Ryan shakes it without hesitation, matching his energy.
Y/N glances between the two of them, tension prickling at her skin. She shoots a quick, desperate look toward the girls. Maddy picks up on it immediately.
āWhy donāt we all head over to the firepit? Get to know you guys a little better, yeah?ā She suggests brightly, already tugging Abigail and a confused Cleo in that direction.
Everyone starts moving. Ryan steps aside, giving Y/N space to pass. She nods a quick thank you and gently slips from Rafeās grip, hurrying to link arms with Sarah. Soon, everyone is gathered around the firepit.
Ryan and Abigail exchange a look and Ryan gestures for her to take the lead.
āAlright, I'm Abigail. Abby, Gail, Abs...Ginger, if you prefer.ā She begins, then laughs softly. āSorry, already getting ahead of myself. I'm 25, an interior designer and I'm from Ohio. My last relationship ended about a year ago and I think I'm finally ready to dip my toes back into the dating pool. But I'm probably boring you already, soā¦Ryan?ā She trails off, earning smiles from the group. Thereās something endearing about her, the way she speaks with such warmth and sincerity.
āHonestly, I could listen to you for hours.ā Kiara beams and everyone laughs in agreement. Abigail grins, clearly flattered. She looks back at Ryan and he nods.
āAlright, uhā¦Iām Ryan, 23, from California. Been living in New York for the last couple of years. And Iāve been single for about two years now.ā He laughs lightly. āIām a model.ā
āThatās why you look so familiar.ā Y/N suddenly mutters. The group turns to look at her and she quickly clamps a hand over her mouth.
āSorry, I justā¦you look so familiar andā¦ā Her eyes widen. āWait! You were in Sabrina Carpenter's music video!ā
Everyone stares at her, confused, but Ryanās face lights up in recognition.
āYeah, yeah. Are you a fan of hers?ā He asks, leaning in as if itās just the two of them around the firepit. Y/N grins, clearly proud of herself.
āWhat are you talking about? 'Emails I Can't Send' went triple platinum in my apartment.ā She jokes and the girls burst into laughter. Ryan chuckles along with them, but the guys are still left confused. Meanwhile, Rafe sits with his arms crossed, silently observing the exchange with an unreadable expression.
āOkay...Ryan, what are you hoping to find in the villa?ā Maddy asks, trying to steer the conversation in a new direction. He nods, grateful for the shift.
āRight. Umm...honestly, I hate being single. Iām looking for someone who matches my vibe, gets my humor. Someone who actually wants to understand me, like, really get to know me for who I am.ā He explains and the girls nod along, listening closely.
The islanders continue to grill Ryan and Abigail, the chatter slowly dying down as they break into smaller groups. Kiara, Maddy and Topper take the lead, offering to show them around the villa. Rafe heads to the kitchen, grabbing another drink and that's when Y/N decides to follow, her steps slow but purposeful.
āHey.ā Her voice is soft, almost hesitant, as she watches him crack open a can of beer. He nods without looking at her, takes a long sip and the silence between them feels heavier with each passing second. Y/N can feel the frustration building in her chest.
āAre you okay?ā She asks, her words a mix of concern and impatience.
āI'm fine, Y/N.ā His tone is too casual, like heās brushing her off and it only makes her more tense.
āRafeā¦ā She steps closer, her voice quiet but insistent. āWeāve been here before. Justā¦talk to me.ā She feels the sting of his walls going up again, but she refuses to back down. He clenches his jaw, eyes on the condensation running down his drink.
āThereās nothing to talk about.ā
āBullshit.ā Her voice cracks with frustration and his eyes snap up to hers, a flicker of surprise. āSomething set you off earlier and now you're shutting me out. Again!ā She feels the heat rise in her chest, the words tumbling out before she can stop them.
āAnd you know I had a shitty morningā¦ā She steps closer, narrowing her eyes as she watches him. āAnd youā¦ā Her words come out sharp, full of accusation.
āYou did it again. Ignored me. Didnāt say a word. No explanation. Like I donāt even exist, until Ryan walked in.ā
She watches his eyes shift, knowing he recognizes what sheās calling out.
āJust talk to me, Rafe.ā She presses, her voice tight with pent-up frustration. āI'm right here. I want to be here for you. But how can I help if you keep shutting me out like this? How am I supposed to do anything if you donāt let me in?ā
āWhat donāt you understand about me not wanting to talk about it?ā He snaps, the tension thick in his words. His brow furrows, his hands clenching around his drink. āI didnāt ask for your help, okay? Iām not fucking needy like-ā He stops himself mid-sentence, rubbing a hand over his face.
āLike me?ā Her voice is barely above a whisper, the hurt slipping through despite her effort to control it.
āY/N-ā
"Is that what you were going to say?" She interrupts, her words cutting through the air, sharp and bitter. He steps toward her, but she takes a step back, her gaze dropping to her fingers, absently fiddling with the spot where her comfort ring usually sits.
āIām sorry if I made this about me. That wasnāt my intention.ā Her voice is small now, quieter than before, as if the fight has drained all the strength from her. āAnd if thatās how you feelā¦maybeā¦ā
āDonāt.ā His voice is low, a warning and he takes another step closer.
āYou need space. Youāve made that clear today.ā She says, her voice barely above a whisper.
āI donāt need space.ā He retorts, frustration in his tone. āWell, I do.ā She murmurs, turning to walk toward Sarah. Rafe starts to follow but stops himself, exhaling sharply.
āFuck.ā He mutters under his breath, frustration pulsing through every word.
Y/N curls up on the daybed, her eyes distant as John B and Sarah try to offer some comfort.
āI just canāt wait for this day to be over.ā She mutters, absently fiddling with one of the pillows in her lap. Sarah gently rubs her arm, her voice soft.
āI know.ā She whispers. āYou know, for someone so sweet and quiet, you sure have a lot of drama going on.ā She tries to lighten the mood and Y/N canāt help but smile, despite everything.
āAre you complaining?ā She teases, glancing up at Sarah. Sarah chuckles, shaking her head.
āNot at all.ā
āYouāre keeping us entertained.ā John B adds with a grin and the girls share a small, knowing laugh.
Just as the conversation starts to shift, Ryan suddenly stands up from the bean bags, cutting his chat with Alyssa short. He looks toward the daybed and whistles to get their attention.
āAnyone lose a ring?ā He calls out and Y/Nās eyes widen. She immediately jumps up from the daybed, her dress swishing around her legs as she rushes toward him, her hands nervously clutching the fabric. Ryan holds out the ring and she stares at it in disbelief, letting out a sound thatās somewhere between a squeal and a whimper.
āOh my god!ā She exclaims, her eyes glued to the ring as though it could disappear at any moment. She looks up at Ryan, her heart pounding and without thinking, wraps her arms around his shoulders, pulling him down to her height. He freezes for a second, caught off guard, before instinctively wrapping his arms around her in confusion as she squeezes him tightly.
āThank you, thank you, thank you!ā She repeats, her voice cracking with relief and gratitude before pulling back, her hands still holding on to his arms. āYou have no idea what thisā¦Iā¦ā She struggles to find the words.
Ryan simply nods, a small, understanding smile pulling at his lips. She reaches out to take the ring from him, but he gently pulls his hand back.
āLet me.ā He murmurs, his voice low and steady. He takes her hand carefully, sliding the ring onto her finger with a tenderness that catches her breath. The moment feels suspended in time.
Everyone else in the yard, even Cleo and Pope from the balcony, watches the scene unfold. From across the kitchen, Rafeās jaw tightens, his fist clenching around the can of beer. He squeezes it too hard, the can crumpling in his hand, beer spilling down his pants.
āFor fuckās sake.ā He mutters under his breath, the frustration barely contained.
āEasy there, dude.ā Kelce calls out, noticing Rafeās sudden tension, grabbing bag of chips.
Meanwhile, Y/N, still in shock, leans into Ryan for one more quick hug, thanking him over and over again, her voice shaking with emotion. She pulls back, a wide grin spreading across her face, before dashing back toward Sarah. With a squeal, she shows off the ring to both Sarah and John B, her fingers playing with it nervously as she gushes about it.
And just when the islanders think their eventful night is over, a loud ping echoes through the yard.
āYou gotta be kidding me!ā JJ exclaims, looking at Abigail, who glances at him in confusion. Rafe pulls out his phone and reads the text carefully.
āIslanders, the Hideaway is open tonight. Time to send one couple away for some special alone time. #spicytime #oneonone.ā He reads aloud, then pockets his phone as the islanders cheer and run around excitedly. They gather around the kitchen.
āOkay, it definitely has to be you two.ā Cleo suggests, pointing to Rafe and Y/N. Most of the islanders nod in agreement as the two exchange a long, silent stare. Y/N exhales deeply, shakes her head and looks back at the group.
āIā¦I think a different couple should go.ā She says, fidgeting with her ring, a habit no one misses. Cleo furrows her brows, noticing the tension between them, and sighs.
āOkay, but please, donāt send me and JJ, thatās all Iām asking!ā Cleo raises her hands in surrender and steps back, making everyone chuckle.
āOh come on, ābaby.ā You know you want us to be alone.ā JJ teases, leaning in for a kiss. Cleo pushes him away with a disgusted noise.
āOkay, in all seriousness, who do you think should go?ā Maddy asks, looking around, but everyone seems as clueless as she is. Pope scratches the back of his neck.
āI mean...me and Kiara are coupled up from the start, like Y/N and Rafe.ā He says. Kiaraās eyes widen as she takes a sip from her drink.
āYeah, Iā¦I donāt think weāre ready for thatā¦ā She says quickly. The girls exchange questioning looks before turning to each other.
āWhat about...Kelce and Maddy?ā Y/N suggests. Most of the group nods in agreement. Kelce looks at Maddy, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow.
āWhat do you say, Mads?ā Sarah asks and everyone turns to her. Maddy smiles nervously.
āIf...if you guys are okay with thatā¦then sure.ā She says. The group cheers, agreeing. The girls hug Maddy tightly before pulling her upstairs to get ready.
āOh my god!ā Maddy exclaims, sinking into the vanity seat. āHow the hell am I the one going to the Hideaway first?ā She says, still shocked by the groupās decision. The girls laugh as they help her get ready. Cleo and Y/N look through their wardrobes for lingerie and cute clothes while Kiara redoes Maddy's hair. Meanwhile, Sarah, Alyssa and Abigail sip their drinks and joke about the night ahead.
āCan we please talk about Y/N and Rafe before I head out? I feel like I missed a few episodes there.ā Maddy says, turning to Y/N, who is still focused on a lingerie set in her hands.
āWe got into a fight.ā Y/N mutters, showing Maddy the set. Maddy scrunches her nose, shaking her head as Y/N digs through her wardrobe for a different outfit.
āHe was clearly upset earlier and I tried to ask him about it, comfort him, but he just...pushed me away.ā Y/N explains and the girls listen closely.
āKiara, steam!ā She points out as Kiara pulls away the straightener from Maddyās hair, grimacing but playing it off.
āAnyway, I donāt want to ruin your mood. Youāre going to the Hideaway, bitch!ā Y/N says, cheering and the girls join in as Maddy laughs and shimmies in her seat, Kiara steadying her to finish her hair.
Eventually, they settle on a dark purple lace bodysuit for Maddy. She pulls her robe over and the girls watch as she checks herself out in the mirror.
āWhatās the plan for tonight?ā Sarah asks. Maddy shrugs.
āWeāre not going all the way, if thatās what youāre asking.ā She says, then turns to the group. āI guess weāll see. If the chemistry is still there behind closed doors...if weāre compatible enough...you know.ā
The girls nod.
āJust donāt feel pressured or anything because itās finally just the two of you.ā Y/N advises. The others agree.
āJust enjoy it.ā Alyssa adds. The group nods together.
āGuys, I love you.ā Maddy says, pouting and opening her arms. āCome on, group hug!ā She exclaims and they all rush in for a tight embrace before pulling back.
āYou ready?ā Kiara asks. Maddy nods, grabbing her little bag with the essentials for the night as the girls open the door and head downstairs. They enter the bedroom, finding the boys sitting around. Kelce paces across the room, wearing grey comfy shorts with his Calvin Klein boxers peeking out. When the door opens and Maddy steps in wearing her robe, the boys all cheer and holler, along with the girls. Maddy and Kelce share an awkward hug before Topper and Cleo push them to go outside. Everyone follows as they walk to the Hideaway. Kelce lets Maddy go inside first, then turns around and makes a silly face at the guys. As they laugh, Maddy comes back out, grabs his bicep and pulls him inside forcefully.
āUse protection!ā JJ shouts. Maddy gives him the middle finger, sending kisses to the girls.
āSee yāall tomorrow!ā She says before closing the door.
āHave fun, you two!ā Y/N shouts.
āBut not too much!ā Cleo adds. The islanders laugh before heading back inside. The girls go upstairs to get ready for bed, remove their makeup and change into pajamas.
āHey, Sar?ā Y/N calls out softly as she enters the bathroom, where Sarah is brushing her teeth. Sarah glances up at her through the mirror and nods.
āI just wanted toā¦to say Iām sorry I didnāt suggest you and John B go to the hideaway.ā Y/N starts, hesitating. āI donāt knowā¦I just figured, since Maddy and Kelce were always flirting before the recoupling and theyāre close...Not that you and John B arenāt, itās just that I-ā She trails off, rambling a bit, but Sarah quickly spits out her toothpaste and turns to her.
āY/N, what are you even apologizing for?ā Sarah laughs lightly. āYou donāt have to. Honestly, I wasnāt ready for that yet. Itās still early for me and JB.ā She gives Y/N a reassuring smile and Y/N nods, relieved.
āI just donāt want things to get weird between us.ā Y/N murmurs, a soft chuckle escaping her. āIāve got enough drama to deal with already.ā Sarah chuckles, but thereās a hint of sadness in her smile.
āWeāre good, okay? You didnāt upset me, if thatās what youāre worried about.ā She pauses, then adds. āHonestly, I think we all just expected you and Rafe to go.ā Y/N sighs, her shoulders dropping.
āYeahā¦I know.ā She mutters, her voice soft. āBefore you ask, I donāt even know where we stand right now. Iā¦I guess Iām justā¦hurt?"
Sarahās expression softens and she pulls Y/N into a tight hug.
āI love you.ā She murmurs into her hair. Y/N smiles, hugging her back tightly.
āI love you too.ā She responds. When they pull apart, Sarahās face lights up with a teasing grin.
āWell, there are plenty of fish in the sea.ā She says, raising an eyebrow. āLike Ryanā¦ā
Y/Nās eyes widen and she quickly covers Sarahās mouth with her hand.
āSarah!ā She says, laughing, but clearly embarrassed. Sarah pushes her hand away, still grinning.
āWhat? Iām just saying! You two seem like you could really hit it off. Plus, you canāt deny the guyās good looking.ā Y/N sighs but canāt help but smile.
āYeahā¦he is kind of cute.ā She admits, her cheeks flushing slightly. āAnd he smells really nice. When we hugged, I got this whiff of his cologne andā¦I guess you think Iām weird now?ā
Sarah chuckles, shaking her head.
āI love your weird little ass.ā She teases, making Y/N laugh. āSo, what do you think? Would you get to know him?ā Y/N pauses, glancing around before responding.
āI donāt knowā¦Things with Rafe are complicated right now, but at the end of the day, weāre here to connect with people. So yeah, Iād give him a chance. Plus, he knows Sabrina Carpenter.ā She adds with a smirk and Sarah bursts out laughing.
āAh, yes, very important element when you're searching for your ideal man.ā Sarah agrees, still chuckling as they head downstairs.
When they reach the bedroom, Y/N approaches her bed with hesitation. Rafe is already lying there, shirtless and under the covers. She slides in, sitting near the edge, taking small sips from her water bottle.
Rafe watches her quietly. Sheās in a hoodie and shorts, but his eyes flicker over her, noticing it's not his hoodie and something tightens in his chest. He quickly looks away, focusing on Topper talking to Alyssa on the other side of the bed.
āHey, neighbor.ā Ryanās voice breaks his focus and Rafe turns to see him sitting on the bed across from her side. Y/N smiles softly in response and they start chatting.
Rafeās body grows tense, the tension in the room shifting.
Eventually, the lights go out and everyone settles into bed close to their pairs, except for Y/N and Rafe, who are still on opposite sides of the bed. Y/N faces Ryan, her eyes half-lidded, when she feels a soft shift behind her. Rafe leans over and presses a gentle kiss to her cheek.
āCan we talk tomorrow?ā He whispers.
Y/N doesnāt answer right away, but after a moment, she nods silently. Itās enough for Rafe. He shifts closer, his hand gently resting on her waist.
āThis okay?ā He asks, his voice low.
Y/N nods again, quicker this time. Rafe relaxes slightly, holding her close, but as his thoughts drift, the fear of losing her lingers, until sleep finally takes over.
can you make a series where rafe and reader broke up 3 years ago, but she comes back to Outer Banks only now she has a daughter(who looks just like Rafe) and a husband (Whom she doesn't really love) and rafe still loves her
Forever & Always
Synopsis: Elena Vanderbilt left Outer Banks right after being broken up with Rafe 3 years ago. Now, she returns to her hometown- but sheās not the same girl who left. This time, sheās back with a husband by her side and a daughter in her arms.
Characters
āĖąæ Elena Vanderbilt, as you, 24 years old, kook
āĖąæ Rafe Cameron, 26 years old, kook
āĖąæ Daniel Tomsky, 25 years old, Elenaās husband, from New York
āĖąæ Leiah Vanderbilt, 2 years old, Elenaās daughter
āĖąæ And other obx characters as themselves but slightly older
Synopsis: Elena Vanderbilt left Outer Banks right after being broken up with Rafe 3 years ago. Now, she returns to her hometown- but sheās not the same girl who left. This time, sheās back with a husband by her side and a daughter in her arms.
Elena
I grabbed Leiahās hand and hurried back home. GodāI canāt believe I actually ran into him. As if dreaming about him earlier wasnāt enough, and now this happens the moment I land back in OBX.
āHey, what took you so long?ā Daniel asked.
āOh, you know just showing Leiah around,ā I replied, setting her down on a chair.
I gave a weak smile. I knew I shouldnāt lie, but I wasnāt sure how Daniel would react if I told him I saw my ex the very first day we arrived.
I laid out the food on the table, eager to finally eatāit was already evening, and we hadnāt had lunch yet.
As we ate, Daniel kept talking about his renovation plans for the house, but honestly, I wasnāt listening. My mind was stuck on that encounter with Rafe. Part of me felt like my heart shattered all over again, but another part was just... happy to see him. These past three years have been the longest Iāve ever gone without him, and I never realized how alone I felt.
Danielās touch pulled me out of my thoughts.
āYou okay, babe?ā
I turned to him and realized Iād been zoning out instead of eating my food.
āI thought you were hungry?ā He asked again.
āOh, yeah... I am. I guess Iām just a bit tired from the long journey,ā I said, staring at my plate.
āAlright, letās finish up and head to bed early. We can pick up the cleaning tomorrow,ā he smiled reassuringly.
Later that night...
I sat at my momās old vanity, applying my skincare. Sure I used to sneak her clothes and makeup in high school, but now the vanity was full of my own stuff, it felt strange. Even stranger that I was sleeping in my parentsā old room now.
Then I saw Daniel came up behind me, wrapping his arms around me through the mirror reflection.
āMy beautiful wife,ā he whispered, kissing the top of my head.
I smiled and held his hand.
āYou sure youāre okay, honey?ā he asked. āYouāve been spacing out all day. Is there something you want to tell me?ā
I turned to face him, taking his hands in mine. āI... I think being back here just feels weird. I know it hasnāt been that long, but without my parents around, the house feels... quiet. And sleeping in their room nowāitās something I need to adjust to.ā
āAww, baby. Come here,ā he said, hugging me close. āItās okay, I get it. If youāre uncomfortable, just tell me. We can always go back to New York. Itās not like weāre staying here foreverājust until I wrap up work in Charleston.ā
I rested my head against his chest and nodded.
He gently pulled back and looked me in the eyes. āYou good now, honey?ā
I nodded.
āYou sure?ā
I let out a soft laugh. āYes.ā
But honestly? I wasnāt sure. I had no idea how I was going to survive these next few months if I kept running into Rafe. And my friends... they probably already know Iām back. Iām not ready to face them, not after the way I disappeared last time. Not to mention Iām back with a husband and a daughter now. Still, I want to be back here. I never really left OBX and I donāt mind spending my whole life here. I just love it here so much, maybe because of the memories, the view, and ācertainā companies.
Then, out of nowhere, I cupped Danielās face. āKiss me,ā I whispered.
He didnāt hesitate. Our lips met slowly, but it slowly getting intimate. He grabbed my hips, and I wrapped my legs around him as he lifted me.
What am I thinking? Just a second ago I was weirded out by being in this room, and now Iām about to have sex in it?
He placed me on the vanity, lips trailing down my neck. I closed my eyes, taking in the pleasure. But when I opened them again, my heart stoppedāit wasnāt Daniel kissing me. It was Rafe. Just like in the dream I had earlier.
I shoved him away with a terror in my face.
His face came into focus, then I realized, it was Daniel. I was losing it.
āBabe? What the hell? Whatās wrong?ā Daniel asked, alarmed.
āIāIām sorry... I thought I saw something. Iām losing my mind,ā I muttered, reaching for his hands.
Then, a knock interrupted us. āMommyā¦ā
It was Leiah.
I got up and opened the door. āWhatās wrong, baby?ā
āI canāt sleep in that roomā¦itās not home,ā she said, holding her little monkey Jellycat.
She was supposed to sleep in my old room, but clearly she wasnāt used to this place yet.
āAw, do you want to sleep with mommy?ā I asked.
She nodded and rushed into the room.
āHey, buddy... youāre sleeping here tonight?ā Daniel said as he scooped her up and placed her on the bed.
He came back over to me and tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. āYou said you were tired, so letās just sleep, okay?ā
āDan, about earlierāā I started, but he cut me off gently.
āShh, itās okay. Letās just go to bed,ā he whispered, kissing my cheek.
I nodded and followed him to bed. I turned off the lamp, and we laid down in the dark with Leiah in between us. A few minutes later, both Daniel and Leiah were sound asleep.
But me? No matter how exhausted I was, I just couldnāt sleep- still overthinking about Rafe and how Iām gonna face the rest of the people.
Rafe
I was lounging on the couch, half-watching whatever was playing on the TV, when a loud, frantic bang nearly made me jump out of my skin.
āRafe!ā
More pounding.
āRafe, manāopen up!ā
I hurried to the door and yanked it open. āTopper? Dude, what the hellāā
He was breathless, hands on his knees like he just sprinted a mile. āEl... Elena. Sheās back.ā
I blinked. āYeah. I know.ā
Topper straightened up, blinking at me like I just told him the sky was green. āYou know? Then why the hell are you just chilling here like itās nothing?! Go see her!ā
āI have seen her,ā I said, crossing my arms.
āOh,ā he muttered, caught off guard. Then he squinted at me. āThen why do you look like someone just ran over your dog?ā
āI am happy,ā I replied, though my voice lacked conviction. āItās justā¦ā
He raised a brow. āOh my god. You fucked it up already, didnāt you.ā
āShut up. No, I didnāt,ā I snapped, but the way he was looking at meāfull of judgment and just the right amount of Topper smugnessāmade me crack. āOkay. Maybe I said something I shouldnāt have. But Iām gonna apologize, alright? I just... donāt know how.ā
Topper shook his head in mock disappointment. āClassic Rafe Cameron,ā he muttered, then tilted his head. āWaitāhowād you find out she was back?ā
I shrugged. āRan into her. Literally. First day she got here.ā
Topperās eyes widened. āDamn. Thatās wild. I actually just heard from this waitress I was flirting withāshe mentioned seeing Elena.ā
I snorted. āOf course you found out through some girl you were hitting on.ā
āHey, I multitask,ā he said with a smirkāthen froze when I added, āYou know sheās married now. And she has a kid.ā
Topper looked like heād been hit in the face with a brick. āIām sorry, what?ā
āYup. Apparently sheās Mrs. Tomsky now. And her daughterās name is Leiah.ā
āHoly shit,ā he breathed, patting me awkwardly on the back like Iād just lost a limb. āDude⦠I didnāt know. Thatāsāman, thatās rough.ā
āYeah, tell me about it. She left OBX three years ago and just... moved on. New guy. New life. She didnāt even look back.ā
Topper raised an eyebrow. āAnd she already has a kid? Damn, she really didnāt take time to grieve. Just jumped straight into the next chapter.ā
I shrugged, jaw clenched. āThe girl is actually adorable. Sheās got brown hair like El. Blue eyes, though... maybe from the dad.ā
Topper grinned. āGuess that makes me an uncle now.ā
I shot him a look. āWhat the hell are you talking about?ā
He shrugged. āCāmon, man. Elenaās always been like a sister to meāeven though you two broke up, which- not the first time. Iām just sayinā.ā
āTop, whose side are you on?ā
āYours, obviously,ā he said with a smirk. āBut letās be realāyou already fumbled the bag on day one. I mean, what chance do you even have now?ā
āAlright, get out,ā I said flatly.
āOkay, okay, chill. Iām kidding,ā he laughed, heading for the door. āAnyway, I gotta bounceāsome actual responsibilities await.ā
He paused at the door, glancing over his shoulder. āYou coming to the bonfire tomorrow night? Who knows, she might be there.ā
I hesitated. āMaybe.ā
Topper winked. āWell, I take that as a yes. See ya!ā
And with that, he was goneāleaving me with the TV buzzing in the background and a pit growing in my stomach. I actually didnāt want to go to bonfire but what Topper said was true, she might be there and I could apologize to her.
Elena
It was finally morning.āØNot that it matteredāI hadnāt slept a second.
The sky outside was tinted with the soft pastels of sunrise, and the silence in the room was broken only by the slow, peaceful breaths of Daniel and Leiah sleeping next to me. But I couldnāt stay still any longer. My chest felt like it was going to explode from nerves and anticipation.
7:03 AM. I was out of bed in an instant.
I scribbled a quick noteāāWent for a walk. Be back by breakfast.āāand stuck it on the fridge before grabbing the car keys. Daniel would freak if he woke up and I was gone with no explanation. He might still freak a little, but this was something I had to do. I needed to tell them myself. I couldnāt risk them finding out I was back from someone else. They deserved that much from me.
The drive to the Chateau felt like both a blur and an eternity. Rafe had mentioned they were still living there, and God, I hoped that was still true.
When I pulled into the familiar gravel path, my breath caught. The place looked⦠beautiful. The once-beaten-down house now had a fresh coat of paint, a wind chime dancing in the early breeze, and even little flower trees planted out front. It felt like homeābut also foreign, like a memory youāre afraid to disturb.
I stepped up to the door, heart racing, and raised my hand to knock. For a second, I froze.āØWhat if they slam the door on my face? What if they hate me?āØBut I knocked anyway. Once. Twice. Then louder. They were definitely still asleep.
A groggy voice called from inside.āØāWho is it?āāØThen the door swung open.
Standing there in just his boxers, squinting in the sunlight, was John B. He looked older, more filled outālike life had carved maturity into him. His jaw dropped.
āHoly shit⦠Sarah! SARAH, COME HERE!ā
A rustling came from deeper inside. āWho the hellāā Sarahās annoyed voice grumbled from behind him, footsteps approaching fast.
āI know, I know itās early,ā I stammered as she came into view, ābut I had toāā
āEl?ā Sarah blinked, and in the next second, she threw her arms around me in a crushing hug. āOh my God. Elena. Is this really you? Iām not still dreaming, right?ā
I clung to her like Iād never let go, tears stinging the back of my eyes. āIām so sorry,ā I choked. āIām sorry for everything.ā
āShh. Itās okay, hey,ā she whispered, brushing her hand over my hair. āYouāre here.ā
When we finally broke apart, our eyes were both glassy.
āHi,ā I said with a watery smile, then turned to John B, holding out my arms. āJohn Bā¦ā
He hesitated only a second before wrapping me in a hug. āWe missed you, El.ā
He pulled away suddenly. āWaitāI gotta call the others. They need to be here.ā
Minutes later, they all came stumbling into the chateau, groggy and annoyed that theyād been summoned at the crack of dawn.
JJ was the first to walk in. āIf someone isnāt dying, I swear toāāāØHe stopped mid-sentence when he saw me. His jaw clenched.āØThen came Kiara, Pope, and even Cleo. One by one, confusion turned into shock. And then, in the blink of an eye, we were all in a tangled group hug, tears, laughter, disbelief filling the air.
āI know,ā I whispered. āI was a mess. And I didnāt know how to say goodbye without making it worse. But Iām here now.ā
They started asking questions all at once, so I took a breath and spilled everythingāI was married now. Daniel Tomsky. Weād met in New York.āØAnd then I told them about Leiah. My daughter. Two years old.
The room fell silent. JJās face shifted instantly.
āYou have a kid?ā His voice was low, too calm. āA whole-ass kid?ā
I barely nodded before he stormed out the front door without another word.
āJJāā I called, rushing after him.
I found him sitting on the porch railing, staring at nothing. His jaw was tight.
āJJ, please. Talk to me.ā
āYou just... left,ā he muttered. āOne day you were here, and the next, you were just gone. And now youāre back with a husband and a kid like we itās a small thing that happened to you.ā
My chest tightened. āIt wasnāt like that.ā
āThen what was it like, El? Because we were your family. And you didnāt even tell us when you got married. You didnāt tell us anything.ā
āI know. I know I screwed up,ā I said, tears burning again. āI was scared, JJ. Everything happened so fast and I didnāt know how to explain it. I thought if I stayed in touch, it would just hurt more. But I missed you. I missed all of you every single day.ā
He didnāt say anything for a long time. Then finally, he exhaled slowly. āYou shouldāve let us hurt with you, not pushed us out.ā
I stepped closer. āIām sorry. I really am. Iām not asking you to forgive me right now, just... maybe one day.ā
JJ didnāt answer, but he gave the tiniest nod.
We walked back inside together. The group was quieter now, but the mood had shifted.
āI should get going soon,ā I said, glancing at the time. āI promised Iād be back by breakfast.ā
Kiara crossed her arms. āThen you better promise youāll come tonight.ā
āTo what?ā
āThe bonfire,ā she said. āEveryoneās going. You should be there.ā
I hesitated.
āItāll be like old times,ā Pope added. āSort of.ā
āIāll... think about it,ā I said, reaching into my bag. āHereās my new number. I want to stay in touch this time. I need to.ā
āHell yeah you do,ā Sarah chuckled.
They took it one by one, saving it without hesitation. And as I walked out of the Chateau and into the morning sun, I felt something I hadnāt in a long timeāa piece of myself falling back into place.
The sky was melting into twilight.āØShades of orange and purple bled into each other as I stood at the edge of the beach, watching the bonfire already blazing in the distance. The familiar sound of laughter, the smell of salt, smoke, and cheap beerāit hit me like a memory I could taste.
I told Daniel if it was okay that I went alone tonight to catch up with my friends and luckily he agreed. He also needed to look after Leiah.
I spotted Sarah firstāhair braided with beads like she used to do when we were teenagers, barefoot in the sand, a drink in hand.
āEl!ā she waved, her eyes lighting up as she ran over. āYou came!ā
āI said Iād think about it,ā I smirked, āand I thought yes.ā
Soon, the whole group spotted me and we slipped into our old rhythmātelling stories, roasting marshmallows, dancing to someoneās scratchy speaker playing old playlist tracks we used to scream out of car windows. It was warm, familiar. For a moment, I even forgot the weight pressing on my chest.
Until he showed up.
Rafe.
His silhouette emerged from the dark side of the dunes like a ghost pulled straight from my past. Black hoodie, hands in his pockets, head tilted like he was already bracing for something.
My heart hiccuped in my chest. Why did he have to still look like that?
And then I saw himāTopper, right behind Rafe, with that smug grin that never changed.
āWell, well, well⦠if it isnāt Elena Vanderbiltāor should I call you Elena Tomsky now?ā he called out, trying to sound casual but failing miserably to hide his smirk.
I arched an eyebrow, halfway through a laugh. āHowāā I started, then glanced at Rafe and put the pieces together. Of course. He told him.
āWell, well, well, Topper Thornton... still a jackass, I see?ā I shot back playfully.
Topper rolled his eyes like it was a well-worn routine. āCome on, give your best mate a hug.ā
I chuckled, closing the space between us for a quick embrace. He was annoying, yeah, but he was still Topperāthe same high school clown who was, unfortunately, part of my youth and memories... and Rafe's circle.
Then Rafe moved. He didnāt say a word to the others. Just walked straight toward me like we were the only two people on the beach. The laughter behind us faded. Everyone suddenly found the contents of their red Solo cups incredibly interesting.
āHey,ā he said softly, his voice almost too familiar.
āHey,ā I replied, my voice barely above a whisper.
We stood there, the ocean wind threading between us, silence stretching until he finally spoke again.
āCan I talk to you, please?ā
I hesitated, but then nodded. āYeah⦠sure. Letās go for a walk.ā
We stepped away from the firelight, the cool sand soft beneath our feet, the breeze tugging gently at my sleeves. For a moment, it felt like we were back in time. Just two kids on a beach. Before the world got heavy.
āYou look good tonight,ā he said finally.
I laughed nervously. āTired mom glow, maybe.ā
He smiled faintly. āI wanted to say Iām sorry⦠about yesterday. I shouldnāt have reacted like that.ā
āItās okay, Rafe. I get it. It was a lot. I probably shouldnāt have blindsided you like that.ā
āNo,ā he shook his head, āI overreacted. We broke up. Youāre allowed to⦠move on.ā
āWell, itās good to see you. You look good too. Whatāve you been up to?ā
āMy dad stepped down from the business. Iāve been handling his real estate stuff lately. Itās⦠intense, but Iām managing.ā
āThatās good,ā I nodded. āSounds like youāre doing well.ā
He glanced over at me. āWhat about you? Are you doing anything right nowālike, besides⦠you know.ā
āMotherhood?ā I smiled. āYeah, while I was in New York I got to sell some art. A few galleries picked up my stuff. But right now Iām just taking a break. Being a full-time mom.ā
āAh, right. Leiah, yeah?ā He paused. āThat her name?ā
āYeah, Leiah. Sheās almost three now. Sometimes itās exhausting, but sheās a good kid. And, you know⦠Daniel helps.ā
His eyes shifted for just a second. āDaniel⦠your husband.ā
āMmhmm,ā I said. āHeās home with her tonight. I told him I wanted to catch up with Sarah and the others.ā
āIād like to meet him sometime,ā Rafe said after a pause. āAnd Leiah again. She was really shy the other day.ā
āYeah, of course,ā I smiled. āIāll show them around sometime.ā
We walked back toward the bonfire but sat a little away from the group, just far enough for the quiet to find us again.
āCan I ask⦠why you came back?ā he asked, his voice gentler now.
āWell,ā I sighed, āDanielās got some work in Charleston next week, so we came early. But also⦠I missed this place. Missed the people. I needed to come back. Even if just for a while.ā
āSo youāre going to Charleston?ā
āNo. Daniel will go back and forth, depending on work. Leiah and I are staying here for a few months.ā
His eyes flickered with something I couldnāt quite name. āSo this is just temporary?ā
āFor now. But who knows? Maybe Iāll stay longer. Maybe even for good.ā
He nodded slowly. We didnāt say anything for a moment.
We stood close now. Too close. The fire behind him lit the edges of his face in gold. The wind played with my hair, tugging it across my face, and just like thatālike nothing had changedāhe reached out and tucked it behind my ear.
My breath caught.
But then I thought of Daniel. Of Leiah. Of everything I had now that I never imagined I would.
āI should go,ā I said, stepping back. āDaniel and Leiah are waiting.ā
His jaw tightened, but he nodded. āRight. Of course.ā
I turned and began walking toward the parking lot, heart pounding like it was trying to climb out of my ribs. But thenā
āElena?ā
I stopped and looked back.
āWeāre good⦠right?ā he asked, his voice tentative.
The question froze me for a moment. Then I smiled gently.
āYeah, weāre good.ā
A tiny smile pulled at his lips. āSo I can call you El again?ā
I laughed. āYes. Iām sorry for snapping about that. Itās actually so weird of you to be calling my full name.ā
He laughed too as a sign of agreement.
And for the first time in days⦠maybe even years, I felt something let go inside my chest. Lighter. Clearer. Like maybe closure was finally starting to form, even if only a little.
I turned around and walked back to my carāfeeling the past not quite gone, but no longer weighing me down the same way.
A/N : This will be the 100th time Iām apologizing for the delayšš¼ Life has been so crazy but I hope you enjoy this chapterš @issabellec7
STONEPIT FINALS AND SPRING CHAOS (18+) āā RAFE CAMERON ONE SHOT
āā SYNOPSIS rafe's been your best friend since forever, and you thought he'd be ecstatic to see you after a three week trip; however, you overhear him telling his friends that it's been nice without you clinging to him every five minutes. so that's what you give him: space. every attempt to get you back falls short, and rafe's confusion only augments when he sees you running with a different crowd.
āā WARNINGS suggestive themes, language, half smut (??? everything's over the clothes, lowkey switch!rafe), swearing, angst and miscommunication but with a happy ending. 18+ mdni.
āā WORD COUNT 16.9k... That's genuinely not okay...
āā NOTES edited from third person perspective to second, so let me know if there are any mistakes.
āā SONGS OF THE CHAPTER guilty pleasure by chappell roan | transparentsoul by willow | misery business by paramore.
we're gonna pretend these are original songs by their band, alright?
āItās been nice to have some peace and quiet without her constantly attached to my hip.ā
You've been replaying his words in your head all night.
Sure, you invited herself over with the intent to surprise him after being gone for three weeks. Coming home a day earlier than expected was a set in stone plan all along, and thought nothing of walking into one of his renowned parties like you always have.
The familiar crowd greeted you like an old friend, throwing around heys and youāre back already? and all the other surprise lingo. You truly did your best to smile and nod to all of them, however these people weren't really your friends, instead mere acquaintances in an adjacent social circle.
The one person you really wanted to see was, undoubtedly, out back smoking a joint or nursing a beer away from the crowd with his two close friends, so you knew exactly where to find Rafe Cameron whenever his six foot something height wasnāt peaking above the crowd.
So on you walked: through the yard, in through the kitchen, and out towards the back porch.Ā
Along the way, you bumped into his younger sister, Wheezie, who greeted you with a genuine hug and sigh of relief that, finally, sheād be able to tolerate any social gatherings held at her house, as long as you were there.
You mostly (always) sought out refuge in Wheezie's room when you didnāt feel like entertaining these rich kid assholes, or whenever you were getting bored with whatever conversations you'd been dragged into just for the sole purpose of keeping him company.
Wheezie, too, knew exactly where Rafe was and even grabbed your hand to lead you to him.Ā
"Itās been nice to have some peace and quiet without her constantly attached to my hip. The clinginess has really been pissinā me off. It's like she canāt do her own thing."
And of course, Wheezie heard it, too, gripping your hand tighter out of pity - or compassion - you couldnāt tell.
Before Wheezie could do anything, you slipped her hand away and took a step back. The young girl looked mortified at her brotherās words, her mouth gaping open and closed like a fish to attempt to defend his words or spin them to make them mean something different.
But you both knew her fruitless attempts wouldn't mean anything.
They were jarring, the words he spoke.
And, frankly, they really pissed you off.
You only stuck around his hip at these things because he always told you to beforehand, something about not wanting you to wander off into trouble (which you had a tendency to do), or because you always grounded him when he was overstimulated.
Rafe was the one who held you close at night, whispering sweet nothings in your ear when heād snuck in through the window after particularly rough fights with his father. He was the one who needed to hold you, to tether himself to someone, to something, just to make it through the night.
So why the fuck was he talking about your clinginess as he's the one who couldn't go one night without you?Ā
You scoffed when you heard it because, pfft, he mustāve been talking about someone else, surely. Thereās no way he said that to his friends, and had the audacity to join in with their laughter.
Oh, it pissed you off.
Because if he really wanted space, sure, you could do that. No problem.
If there's one thing you prided yourself over, it was your dignity and stubbornness. You could give him space. You'll give him all the damn space and go find your own thing.Ā
Which is what you did later that night.Ā
Rafe had advised against it when the proposition was broached to you a couple weeks ago: a music gig.
Here's the sitch: you had a voice people would stop and listen to ā not that you particularly liked boasting about it. It just came to you naturally, and you liked producing in the quaint privacy of your bedroom, mashing songs and creating unheard harmonies on audio software for fun.
You didnāt participate in the school plays or drama programs because, no, those were too on the nose and not the kind of music you'd like to sing (in front of people, anyway). Plus, all of the theater kids in the area are even more annoying than the preconception of the stereotype. Your voice was mainly barricaded inside the shower tiles or sitting pretty in the passenger seat of Rafe's car, or occasionally when you found yourself alone at the beach or on a walk in the dark.Ā
After a particularly grueling and obnoxiously abhorrent gala earlier in the summer, you found herself separated from the party and wallowing with a stolen drink in the back alley of the country club. Rafe was off entertaining whatever girl he had his eyes on for the night and Wheezie wasnāt feeling well so she didnāt attend.
You were bored, tipsy, and feeling pathetically lonely. So, naturally, you started singing softly to yourself in the quiet solitude of the alley, thinking you were alone.
What you didnāt know was that the staff ā a group of Pogues who needed a quick cash grab in the catering gig ā were having their smoke break, and conveniently needed a new lead after their old one transferred schools to the mainland. They were friends with Sarah, Rafe's other sister, who you haven't been close to since you were kids.
You were weary of their proposition, the group not normally being the kind of people you'd hangout with due to them being intimidating, almost too cool, to where you thought you wouldnāt fit in.
Oh, but you did. You did well.Ā
Rafe's overly protective words echoed in your head as you instantly beelined for the door despite Wheezie's pleas, leaving his home and immediately driving to the Cut.
You were told where they practice, a quaint house on the far side of the island where they could riff and rehearse without a noise complaint. You found herself standing in the garage with the mock stage, with a rising sense of pride and retribution.
You told them, fuck it, you were in, that you'd do anything to take the spot that was so graciously offered to you all that time ago, to contribute to their band and to the competitions held in the rough part of the island.Ā
And in you were.Ā
Meanwhile, Rafe had never felt so fucking lost in his life.Ā
Not when he got into earth-shattering arguments with his dad about his spending habits, his overflowing temper, or anything he did under the sun (because anything he did seemed to piss his dad off).
Not when heād spent those months of endless fighting in a hole of self pity, drowning himself in partying and occasional lines to numb the phantom ache in his heart.
Not when heād lose girlfriend after girlfriend because he was incapable of doing what was expected of a boyfriend, not what was expected of Rafe himself.Ā
He was constantly told growing up that feelings were weak, and wearing them on your sleeve was even worse. Being sad was just an excuse to get a pass, to draw attention to get people to feel bad for you. Being sad meant being weak. Being emotional meant being weak. Caring too hard about things meant being weak.Ā
Normally, Rafe was able to move past these episodes because he always had you to seek solace in. But he lost you.
And he had no clue fucking why.Ā
He wouldnāt admit it to anyone breathing that heād been counting down the days until you arrived back from your trip, not even his closest friends that he clung to in your absence.
Because Rafe had a reputation to uphold, and revealing such strong feelings for his best friend would definitely damage his stone cold apparatus. People would see his walls broken down for you and they would assume they were entitled to the same treatment.Ā
No. Rafe liked being unapproachable. Feared, even.
He liked that you clung to him at parties, at the stupid gala events their families would organize to flaunt their money in expensive garb and even more expensive donations that they announce with a bullhorn and neon sign. He liked that you clung to him because he asked you to.
He always asked you to.
And you always complied.Ā
Deep down, Rafe knew that you'd rather go off and stir up some trouble instead, or not attend all together and get into even deeper shit somewhere else, but that meant that you'd be away from him, not under his protective eye, and that always stirred up something ugly in him.
Rafe had to come rescue you one too many times, most times you didnāt even need to ask.
He was just there, waiting for you to be done with whatever you wanted to do, then heād drive you home and (almost always) stay over.
You would tease him relentlessly, you and your smart mouth riling him up to tremendous heights. But he relished in it. He craved it. Because heād rather you drag him every time you opened her mouth instead of what you were doing now, which was ignoring him.Ā
And the radio silence was killing him.Ā
Rafe was ecstatic the day you got home, waiting in your driveway to bring you to school like always. But after waiting for what felt like ages, he found himself on the doorstep yelling at you to hurry up.
Instead of being met with your pretty, Rafe had to hear it from your fucking mother that you had already left, that you got a ride from someone else.Ā
That was just strike one.Ā
Arriving at school with a rise in his temper, Rafe was already having a bad morning.
He was irritated. All week heād been texting with you about how you both were gonna get coffee and catch up in the car before parting ways for classes. It didnāt help that he was nursing a minor hangover, and he felt even more like an idiot bringing in your coffee that heād gotten for you anyway.Ā
Strike two was when Rafe saw you in the hallway, and the weight in his chest immediately lifted at the sight of you, glowing with a new gleam in your eye that had him yearning to know more about what you were up to.
The prior anger fizzled away the closer you got. You were walking straight to him as Rafe grinned and stuck out the coffee for you.
But as you got closer, Rafe's smile slowly faded as he noticed you were looking beyond him, brushing past him with that beautiful smile ā the smile meant for someone else.
He spun around to see who you were ignoring him for, and scoffed when you were greeted with open arms to his sister and her friend group of wannabe rock Pogues that pissed Rafe off at any chance they could.Ā
Rafe was confused and irritated, and he didnāt want to be holding your coffee anymore, frankly. You fit in with them in a sick way that had him aching.Ā
Without thinking, he said your name quizzically with a slight edge to his tone.
A warning, almost.Ā
You had turned around, surprised to see him. He wasnāt sure if you were feigning naivety or just pretending you didnāt see him to piss him off. āOh, hey.ā
He felt stupid, all of a sudden, with all the eyes of your new friend group on him, Sarah even tilting her head at him quizzically.
Rafe held out the coffee. āHere. You ghosted this morning.ā
āSorry,ā you smiled, but it didnāt quite reach your eyes. He hated the way it looked. You took the coffee. āThanks.ā Then you flicked your gaze over your shoulder, at them, and turned back offering him a curt nod. āIāll catch up later.ā
You spun on your heel and joined the group, walking away down the hall sparking an animated conversation as if he was just a bump in the road.Ā
And thatās how it started.Ā
You slowly fizzled Rafe out of your life.
You slowly stopped responding to his messages, stopped showing up to his parties, stopped everything in your life that involved him and, god, it broke his fucking heart.
Every time he stopped over, your parents would say that you were out with friends and he would scoff, not that they would care where you really were. Sometimes theyād say you were upstairs studying, and when they would let Rafe in to go see you, heād be met with an empty bedroom and slightly ajar window.
Pathetically, heād stay in your room because he was usually too embarrassed to go back downstairs and show his face to your parents. Sometimes he slept there in the spot he always slept in on nights where he just couldnāt fucking bear to go home. Sometimes heād just climb out through the window and leave.Ā
Whenever heād see you in school alone, Rafe would jump at the chance to talk to you.
You would entertain him for a walk to class or a quick chat in the library, nothing short of politeness. But Rafe didnāt want polite. He wanted you, and you wouldnāt fucking come back to him.
Instead, you would just give him the same tight lipped smile you gave all the other rich kid assholes that you hated, and then go about your day.Ā
God. Rafe needed you.
He needed a friend, a real friend. Someone he could trust unequivocally, without hesitation. Rafe needed to hold you, and that realization made him want to throttle something.
To be so dependent on you felt weak. It felt horrible, really, to have it suddenly stripped from him with no warning. But the longer he went without you, the more he realized he needed you to hold him. That epiphany had him pissed off more than ever.
Naturally, Rafe resorted to anger because if he didnāt, he would just wallow in sadness and that scared the shit out of him.Ā
But an opportunity blossoms ā a real chance ā to get you talking to him again, even if itās just for one night.Ā
The annual fall donation gala is tonight, and Rafe knows that you wonāt be able to get out of this one due to your motherās incessant inclination to attend as a family, to uphold your image, whatever the hell that means.
Each season the wealthy families on the secluded part of the island gather in their overpriced suits and gowns, flaunt their money, spew some fake bullshit on how much they love charity and specifically how much money they were going to spend towards renovating the rougher parts of the island and the public institutions, all while they down their drinks and snort lines in the bathroom and plaster on fake smiles of grandiose.
Your family and the Camerons go together every season, being neighbors and all, pairing you off with Rafe while Wheezie and his other sister, Sarah, would stick with each other.
Sarah, being just a year younger than him, mostly always brought a random boy as a date. Wheezie often soloed, but would steal you for a better portion of the night. Rafe normally allowed it, but tonight he refuses to let his sister have the time of day.
No matter how much shit Wheezie gives him, he has to have you all night despite her premature protests, which will probably be a lot given the circumstances from the past few weeks.Ā
That's another thing as of late: Wheezie's been uncharacteristically cold to him, making him do ridiculous shit for her to get back on her good side, like taking her out to eat or reviewing her essay or watching a stupid show with her that he never would agree to watch in the first place.
Sure, heāll set himself back a few pegs with Wheezie, but he has to get you back tonight.Ā
But of fucking course you just have to look that beautiful, so it takes Rafe a while to even say anything to you besides a pathetic hello.Ā
As tradition, you and Rafe lock arms as you enter the gala. He notices that you don't hold him as tight.Ā
You notice that heās clenching his jaw so tight it might break, probably pissed that he has to be here in the first place.Ā
You loathe the idea of coming to this pathetic excuse of class performance, but public appearances are the only thing your parents are interested in.
Theyāve been lenient about how much you leave to hang out with āSarahā when in reality you're high tailing it to the rough side of the island getting up to all kinds of trouble (also with Sarah, but that's besides the point). However, they started to get suspicious of where you run off to every weekend, and god forbid they find out you sneak out basically every single night.
Things with the band are going great, too good to jeopardize.
So you figure if going to this gala will satisfy your parentsā consciousness and keep their noses out of your business, then you'll be able to deliver with elegant poise and limited back talk.
It doesnāt help that you and your band have a gig later tonight. The gig. The Stonepit finals. It also doesnāt help that you're stuck here.
But you have a plan.
Since you're here, your bandmates take on the event's catering gig so you'll all leave together an hour before the gala is supposed to end.
Itās slightly embarrassing to be walking arm-in-arm with Rafe under their knowing stares, especially since they have a vague idea of what really went down between you and the Kook prince.
Theyāre familiar with the island royal because of Sarah anyway, and despite not entirely liking him due to Rafe's douchebag tendencies, theyāre sympathetic to you for choosing to step away from someone you once called your best friend.
Your friends, your new friends, care for you and know the hurt that came with ending things with Rafe, even if you never explicitly cried or showed any ounce of emotion when it came to him. They can just tell. And it reflects in the music, much to your dismay.Ā
And sitting next to him all night doesnāt help.
You're polite, saying your please and thank yous. Rafe is quiet, especially with his dad sitting on the other side of him.
One thing you both unintentionally agree on, though, is the synchronized stifled laughter on the faux-emotional speeches the PTO housewives make about the charity of their choice. Rafe and you know of the falsehoods that run through this community, that itās all a stunt for public decency, and you always bet each year how many times they shed crocodile tears before dinnerās served.Ā
The last ripple of applause begins to die down after the last housewife steps down from the microphone, her lip curled up from a previous sob reforming back to a nonchalant tight lip as soon as sheās out of the spotlight. You push food around your plate with your fork, stifling a cold laugh that will undoubtedly earn a scolding from your mother.Ā
āI counted seven,ā you say softly, indulging.Ā
It surprises Rafe. Immensely. His brows raise at the jab and he looks over to see if you were talking to yourself or actually to him, to see you staring at him in anticipation for his response.
Rafe's heart does a weird thump. āOne of the better years, for sure.ā
You laugh quietly and Rafe nearly sighs at the sound.Ā
Noticing a few older couples heading to the dance floor, Rafe bites the bullet, clearing his throat to get your attention as he holds his hand out.Ā
āDance?ā
You dart your gaze between his hand, his eyes, and the dance floor, uncertain. This makes Rafe's heart thump even wilder, and heās certain you can hear it through his all-too-expensive suit jacket. He notices your apprehension, and he pushes down the hurt that springs to his throat.Ā
Despite it, he chuckles nervously. āIt doesnāt have toā¦mean anything. Just to get away from this.ā
Rafe gestures towards their table, their parents having a little too much to drink and starting to ramble on about shit they donāt care about. Sarahās off with her boyfriend, John B., who should be working but doesn't look the slightest bit concerned about slacking off, while Wheezie talks to one of her friends off to the side, rueing the day in pre-teen style.
As much as you want to say no and stay cordial to your dignity, you're starting to get a headache from your motherās high-pitched laughter and dadās intolerable business talk, so, reluctantly, you accept and takes his hand.
It takes everything in Rafe to not visibly sigh in relief as he leads you to the dance floor. Your friend, JJ, smirks behind the seafood buffet table, watching them. You throw him an eye roll that Rafe doesnāt see, to which JJ just shrugs and winks.Ā
Slinking your hands around his neck, your heart skips a beat at the close proximity. Rafe's hands settle on your waist.
It draws in a sense of comfort, of familiarity that heās been yearning for all this time without you. He takes a deep breath, embarrassingly deep, because for the first time in what feels like forever, he feels like he can finally breathe again despite the intoxication of your perfume and the stench of cigarettes wafting from the balcony.Ā
Rafe takes the time to study you up close.
You cut your hair in a more edgy way, drastically different from your previous untouched hair that he was used to twirling between his fingers under Egyptian cotton sheets. Itās different, but he likes it. You looks comfortable, like yourself. He also notices the excessive added jewelry that you've been wearing lately.
Although Rafe frowns after his inspection, noticing itās none of the jewelry that heās given you over the years. Your makeup is clean, effortless.Ā
Beautiful, he thinks.Ā
Fuck.Ā
He doesnāt realize you say something until you pinch his neck.Ā
āHm?ā
āI asked if you were okay. You were brooding,ā you tease quietly.
It feels like old times again. āI donātā¦brood,ā he attempts to defend.Ā
You snort. āSure.ā
And thatās that.Ā
Rafe doesnāt really know what to add from that, nor where to start on what he really wants to talk about with you.
It takes everything in him to not scream in frustration. Heās not good with his words, he doesnāt know how to vocalize the sensitivity that he feels in fear of being perceived as weak. Heās only good at physically projecting his anger, his irritation, his emotions that make him feel strong or, more so, his actions that make people fear him and submit to what he wants.
Itās easier that way, to not have to use words to convey what he wants done and what he needs people to do.Ā
But not with you, never with you.Ā
āIā¦ā he starts lowly, trying to calculate his thoughts but theyāre just a whirlwind in his mind right now. āHow have you been?ā
Rafe cringes at himself.Ā
You frown, moving forward with caution at his uneasiness. The classical band plays something slow and melodic and so fucking romantic that it makes you want to throw up. āGood. Really good, actually. Been busy.ā
āWith?ā Rafe attempts.
āWithā¦stuff.ā
He swallows. Of course you wonāt tell him, why would you?
āHow about you?ā you ask timidly, noticing his sunken expression. āAre you okay?ā
Rafe hesitates.
No, heās been at his lowest. Heās been losing his mind without you at his side to anchor him to his real self. Heās been lost trying to figure out what you've been up to, why you've been running and hiding from him ever since you got back from your trip all those weeks ago. Heās especially lost in trying to figure out why you've been running with his sister and her annoyingly arrogant Pogue friends.Ā
Rafe assumes you tell them all your tidbits now, like what you did that day or what show you're watching, talking to them how you used to talk to him.
It makes him sick. He feels like a fucking idiot trying to figure out what he did wrong, always coming up blank on answers but never having the courage to just ask you what the hell happened that rendered such coldness from you.Ā
āYeah. Been okay,ā he settles on.Ā
Despite the strain on his voice, you manage to smile at him, but thereās an ounce of worry in your expression that throws him off.
Heās confused: do you still care about him? Is that still on the table? Are you really going to dance around the elephant in the room? Are you going to keep acting like nothing is wrong? Are you ever going to tell him what he did?
āItās a busy time of year, I wouldnāt-ā you start nonchalantly, but Rafe suddenly scoffs at your attempt to small talk with him. This earns a pointed glare. āIs something wrong?ā
Rafe scoffs again. āOf course somethingās wrong." No going back now. "Everythingās fucking wrong. Weāre standing here making useless bullshit small talk as if you havenāt been ignoring me for weeks.ā
Curse him and his temper, he wants to immediately apologize for his tone. But you frown even further and loosen your grip around his neck but Rafe tightens his.
āNo. We're talking about this. Stop running for a second.ā
āRunning?ā you hiss. āIām notā¦I havenāt been-ā
āYes, you have,ā Rafe says, trying to stay even but his voice betrays him as it shakes. āI donāt know whatās going on with you but Iām losing my mind because you wonāt talk to me, shit, you wonāt even look at me anymore.ā He shuts his eyes for a moment, gathering himself. āI justā¦need to know.ā
Your frown turns into a thin lipped line. Isnāt this what he wanted? Space?Ā
Your mind is reeling. On one hand, you're pissed.
How dare he act ignorant to the fact that he was bitching and moaning for some peace and quiet to his friends, how desperate he was to have some space from your oh-so-overwhelming clinginess, how you couldnāt even do your own thing due to how much you depended on him for everything: friends, a social life, style, a personality. Like, what the fuck?
But on the other hand, you sees Rafe. Your Rafe.
The Rafe who climbs through your bedroom window in tears from his fatherās vocal bullets, searching for solace and warmth that he simply canāt get in the comfort of his own home. The Rafe who rarely knows how to express himself in anything other than rage because thatās how he was taught to deal with his emotions: through instilling fear. The Rafe who would truly do anything for you if you asked nicely. The Rafe who, behind closed doors, is kind, loving, and sweet when he cares, like getting you your favorite ice cream after you failed your exam or staying up until sunrise with Wheezie finishing the show sheās been raving about.
You sees Rafe, a boy who needs answers.Ā
āPlease.ā
His tone of desperation pulls you from your thoughts, a tone he only saves for late night confessions under starlight, just for you.Ā
You canāt help but teeter between the two hands.Ā
āRafe,ā you start carefully, āI came home a day early from my trip.ā
He frowns. The music is too slow, too beautiful. Heās confused. āYou did?ā
You nod. āYes. I wanted to surprise you.ā
The gesture is so fucking sweet that it makes Rafe melt in agony. What did he ever do to deserve your love and friendship for as long as he had it?
āI walked around looking for you, and assumed you were in the back with Top and Kelce. You were, but I heard what you said. All of it.ā
Rafe reels back in confusion.
What?
What are you talking about?
You notice his confusion and scoffs lightly, the sound heavy with hurt instead of bitterness. āOf course you donāt remember.ā You take a breath, replaying the words that have been on repeat in the back of your mind for weeks. āāItās been nice to have some peace and quiet without her constantly attached to my hip. The clinginess has really been pissing me off. It's like she canāt do her own thing.ā You donāt remember saying that?ā
What?
Rafe's mind is spinning because. What.Ā
āIā¦ā he starts, but then stops, piecing it together. No, he couldnāt have.Ā
But you nod, confirming it. āI heard it. So did Wheeze. I didnāt want to make a scene and just figured it would be easier to give you what you wanted. So I backed off. Gave you your space. Found my own footing.ā
Rafe stares at you in disbelief. The words come back to him, each one hitting him harder than the last.Ā
āItās okay,ā you say before Rafe can get a word in, noticing his internal conflict.
He hates the small, understanding smile you're wearing. You should be hitting him or cussing him out.
Instead you're fucking smiling at him, even though it's laced with sadness, it's still a smile. āIāveā¦come to terms with it. I just wish you told me I was being too clingy instead of complaining to your friends about it. I wouldāve backed off if you asked.āĀ
Rafe shakes his head, because of course you would do something if he asked you to without any hesitation.
He canāt believe it, how you heard him say something so horrible (and completely untrue) and aren't cursing him out or going around telling people his deepest darkest secrets and demons. He deserves worse. He deserves nothing good after making you feel so unwanted, like you had to completely remove yourself from his life in order to give him what he ā seemingly ā wanted.Ā
Rafe can only say your name.
āReally, Rafe,ā you say after he canāt form the words he wants, āitās okay.āĀ
āNo, itās not,ā Rafe snaps, chest heaving. āItās not fucking⦠I didnāt mean it.āĀ
Okay. Now you scoff and he frowns.
You're not gonna sit here and listen to him spew out excuses, bullshit excuses, so he can get back on your good side. You're not gonna forget how those words made you feel. If there's one thing bigger than your ability to hold a grudge, it's the need to defend your dignity.
āIf you didnāt mean it, then you wouldnāt have said them ā fuck ā you wouldnāt have thought them in the first place.ā You try to loosen your grip once more to escape but he holds you tighter. You huff. āRafe, let go. Seriously. I said it was fine. Let me go.ā
It isnāt fine, you both know that, but you personally don't want to entertain his fragment words.
But Rafe canāt let you go. Not like this.Ā
āNo, I need toā fuckā¦ā Rafe curses.
Why canāt he just say heās sorry? Own up to it? Push his pride down? No, because that would mean admitting defeat. That would mean admitting something heās tried to push down for years and years in fear of ruining your friendship.Ā
Well, heās already ruined it, so whatās left to lose?Ā
You, he realizes. Heās losing you, and heāll lose you forever if he doesnāt get his shit together at this given moment.Ā
His chest is heaving, he realizes.
His heart feels like itās in his throat and heās gripping you as if you're going to disappear if he lets go. Rafe doesnāt know if itās better or worse that the world keeps spinning around them. Couples keep slow dancing, people keep laughing and drinking, the song still plays. No one knows whatās going on within your bubble right now, the emotional turmoil sizzling between you both speaking in hushed breaths.Ā
āIām sorry,ā he says low and heavy with emotion.
You take that as irritation. āYouāre sorry you got caught.ā
Rafe shakes his head, furrowing his brows as if thatās the dumbest thing heās ever heard. āNo. No. Iām sorry for saying that stupid shit. I didnāt mean it, Snips. Not really.ā
The nickname makes your heart leap to your throat, but you swallow it. āNot really?ā
Rafe curses. āNo, Iā¦fuck-ā
āYou what? What, Rafe?ā
āIāā
āWanted to impress your friends?ā
He grimaces. āNoāā
āNeeded to brag about how Iām always at your beck and call? Your bitch waiting at your disposal?ā
āNo!ā
You laugh humorlessly. āThen what-?ā
āBecause I need you more than you need me, and it scares the shit out of me.ā
You freeze, your next retort dying in your throat as you look at Rafe's desperate expression.
His eyes bore into yours, those piercing bright blues, and you don't notice until now that his hands have been shaking, his chest is falling up and down rapidly, how the crease in his brow is more prominent than ever. You study him, looking for any signs of duplicitousness but coming up short.
Instead you see how broken he really is.Ā
Rafe notices your pity and hates the expression, so he shuts his eyes. āIā¦I think I said it to pretend it was the other way around. Thatā¦maybe if I said it and put it in words, I could pretend that you needed me in the same way. I hated the way I felt for those three weeks without you, and it scared the shit out of me.ā
Silence.Ā
Your hand travels from the back of his neck to caress his cheek, which makes him open his eyes to meet your gaze.Ā
āIt doesnāt make it okay,ā he quickly adds. āWhat I said wasnāt okay. At all. I hate that you heard it.ā
Rafe leans into your touch instinctively, your palm boring into his cheek. His heart thumps for a different reason now, for your silence. He doesnāt know what to make of it. The tension is thick and he hates the way you don't say anything.
Something foreign pricks in his chest, an unsteady murmur.
āPlease, say something,ā he pleads pathetically, feeling stupid at the desperation.Ā
You feel flustered from his words, speechless.
Your heart lurches in your throat at the confession that probably ached in his soul all these weeks, that gnawed at him every time you brushed him off or ignored his messages and did exactly what he was afraid of: leave.
What Rafe said was wrong, very wrong, you know. Thereās no if, ands, or buts about it.
Your heart sinks, though, at the thought of him pushing down his feelings, his real feelings, so deep to the point where he was drowning in his own mind. This is the boy you grew up with, who held you when you were upset, who knew your every thought before she could formulate it, who begrudgingly took you to prom after your date stood you up.
Your Rafe, sharing something so raw and scary.Ā
You hold him with such lightness, such care, murmuring quietly, āRafeāā
Suddenly, a throat clears next to you.
Rafe's anger flares back up when he sees fucking JJ Maybank looking at you, feeling tidal waves of stupidity and irritation that he confessed something so raw to you. He wants to rip you away from this crowd, from JJ, to talk somewhere in private, to even sit in silence if it means he can hold onto you like this for a little while longer.
Call him selfish.Ā
āSorry toā¦interrupt,ā JJ says, darting his gaze between the two of you, finally settling on you after a moment of taking inā¦whatever was happening here. āWe gotta go. Now. Rumlow pushed our slot up.ā
Your hand falls from Rafe's cheek and he gets even more irritated. What business does JJ Maybank have with you? Who the fuck is Rumlow?
You step away from Rafe and, this time, he lets you. āWhat? Youāre kidding.ā You groan and curse, āThe whole deal about winning Greengate was that weād get first pick of the Stonepit slot.ā
JJ huffs. āFreddie slid him a fifty to make sure we go right after his band, so second to last.ā
Band? Rafe furrows his brows.Ā
His confusion is put on the back burner as you ball your fists tight at your side. āDamn it.ā Then, you take a deep breath. āOkay. Letās go out the back.ā
JJ glances at Rafe wearily, whose stare couldnāt be more piercing. āUh, what about your stuff?ā
āItās at the table. My mom will definitely ask too many questions.ā
āBlame the period?ā
You snort. āYou still clearly know nothing about women. Not believable. Best chance is to just slip out. Iāll deal with my mom later.āĀ
JJ moves to leave, walking a few steps away until he notices you aren't following. You hesitate, looking up at Rafe who has been awfully quiet and confused, watching your conversation happen in front of him. His blue eyes bore into yours, a twinge of pain hidden within his features that makes your heart lurch.
You have the sudden inclination to grab his hand, to comfort him for a moment more.Ā
Silence.Ā
Clearing his throat once more, JJ rubs his forehead at the tension between the two. āUh, Iāll give you guys a minute.ā He shoots Rafe a warning glare, one that makes Rafe narrow his eyes, before turning his attention back to you. āMeet us out back when youāre done.ā
And like that, JJ walks off the dance floor and disappears through the staff doorway.
His absence is felt, the air thick between you and Rafe as unspoken words yearn to come into fruition. The slow, romantic melody continues to play as couples sway around you and the emotion behind it makes your tummy feel weird.Ā
āYouāre leaving?ā Rafe manages to ask thickly, the words feeling like lead in his throat.Ā "With...Maybank?"
You look up at him once more, and this time, you actually do grab his hand.
He gazes down at your intertwined fingers as your other hand comes up to graze his knuckles, fingertips smoothing over his rough, calloused skin in such a delicate manner it allows him to breathe for a moment. Your cool rings feel like ice against his hot skin, and he nearly flinches from the contrasting feeling.Ā
Your next words are cautious and slow. āYouāre truly sorry?ā
āYes,ā he immediately answers. āMore than youāll ever know. More than Iāll ever be able to say.ā Rafe squeezes your hand. āLet me make it up to you. Please.ā
You meet his gaze.
His pretty blues no longer glisten with sadness, but instead hold their own. Promising. Genuine. Home. You find herself suppressing a smile because, fuck, you missed him more than you'd like to admit.Ā
Glancing back towards the familyās table, you notice your parents are still talking to Rafe's, the waiter coming over to top off their drinks as they obnoxiously laugh over something that probably wasnāt very funny. Nevertheless, theyāre distracted for the night and clearly not caring about the whereabouts of their children.Ā
An idea - a really stupid idea - pops into your head when you turns back to Rafe, a newfound determination gleaming in your eye that he only knows as trouble.Ā
āCome with me.ā
Rafe's lips part in confusion. āYou want me to?ā Then, more uncertain. "With...them?"
Pushing down the impending fight night that'll probably happen between him and the Pogues, you quirk a brow as you teasingly squeeze his hand.
āThought you wanted to make it up to me.ā
āāF course.ā
āThen letās get into some trouble.ā
He finds himself narrowing his gaze, but thereās no real strictness behind it as he tries to suppress a smile. āSnips, what are you getting me into?ā
You tilt your head to the side and bite the inside of your cheek, taking one last glance at your parents ā more occupied than ever ā before you start pulling Rafe off the dance floor, dragging him through the crowd and through the same staff door that JJ disappeared into earlier.
You don't let go of his hand as you swerve past the catering staff and waiters, beelining for the backdoor leading to the alley.Ā
Noses scrunch at the smell, reeking of garbage, cigarettes, and gas. Itās not the worst thing out there, no, because Rafe tries his best not to grimace when he sees your new group of friends, the Pogues he oh-so despises, hanging by their clown minivan as they all change out of their catering uniform into their own clothes, their performance clothes, just shamelessly half naked and laughing as if it isnāt ridiculously intimate.Ā
Sarah is slipping her ripped jeans on under her dress and shimmying on a tank, a cigarette poking through her plump lips. Kiara is applying lip liner in mirror, perched in the passenger seat. John B. finishes buckling his belt, taking the cigarette out of Sarah's mouth to take his own hit. Pope is sitting in the driverās seat, drumming his thumbs on the steering wheel and checking the time on his watch anxiously. JJ's putting on a shirt when he sees you and Rafe emerge, hand in hand.Ā
āCountry Club, you cominā with?ā JJ teases as he throws his ratty t-shirt on, wearing a smirk that Rafe wants to smack off his stupid face.Ā
You speak before Rafe can start an argument. āGuys, Rafe's gonna tag along tonight. Any issues?ā
Everyone stops what theyāre doing to stare between you and Rafe, and he squirms under their judgemental stare. He knows he hasnāt been the nicest to them, and vice versa, as their social circles often clashed with ferocity. He also knows that theyāre aware of the previous animosity with you based on the way the girls, Kiara and his own damn sister, are glaring at him with such a deep warning that it makes him shiver.Ā
Itās Pope who breaks the silence. āI donāt give a fuck if he shits gold. We need to go now if we want to warm up.ā
JJ snorts. āWeād be lucky to make curtain call.ā
āHave some hope, Jay,ā Kiara mumbles to not mess up her lipliner. āPessimism gives you crows feet.ā
Sarah hums low as she steals the cigarette back from John B., who looks Rafe up and down. The two of them have had their fair share of qualms. Rafe truly can't keep track of how many times he's gotten a black eye from his sister's boyfriend, and vice versa.
But, no, he can't be getting into fights tonight. Not while he's on your probation.
Pope groans and rolls his eyes. āCrows canāt drive. Now, can we please all get in the car before that shitbag gives our slot away?ā
It's muscle memory when Rafe lunches forward to snatch the cigarette from Sarah's mouth, throwing out the cigarette butt onto the concrete with a narrow gaze. She sends him an eye roll, but wordlessly climbs into the minivan with John B. behind her, and to Rafe's surprise, all of the back seats are folded down so they all sit in a circle in the trunk.
His mind races at the hazardous set up.
You notice his concern as you sit down next to him, stifling a laugh and squeezing his hand once out of comfort, pulling it back before Rafe can even process what is happening.Ā
āWe throw all the instruments back here, so the seats stay down,ā you say softly, just to him. Rafe straightens up a little, feeling a sense of pride that you're only talking to him. āYou get used to it after a while.ā
But that beaming pride doesnāt last long as JJ sits on the other side of you, a little too close for his liking, smirking at the two of you.
Rafe bites his tongue as the blond grins toothily at him. āDonāt worry, Country Club. You can hold my hand if you get scared,ā JJ teases, wiggling his fingers at him.Ā
Rafe rolls his eyes and fights the urge to jump him right here and now. The only thing pulling him back to reality is the sound of your laughter.
āFuck off, Maybank,ā is all he manages to pathetically muster up in response.Ā
Pope drives sporadically, ranting about how theyāre not gonna make it now that their slot is moved up, how the lights are never green when he needs them to be, how John B. didnāt fill up the gas tank since he was the last one to drive, and so many more complaints that Rafe loses count.
In the back circle, however, theyāre talking business and spewing vocabulary Rafe's never even heard of.
John B. is going on about JJ needing to remember to wait a beat before the chorus on their first song, and how Kiara needs to be a second step harmony above you, not just one, and how he himself wants to remember one specific rhythm in a riff heās been practicing.
Rafe feels a little outdated due to his outright confusion, feeling like heās at a tennis match just watching them pull out notes back and forth and back and forth.Ā
It isnāt until Sarah tosses you a bag where Rafe truly short circuits.
Your confusion is apparent when you hold up the bag, raising a pointed brow.
Sarah gestures to the bag. āChange. You wonāt have time when we get there. I put in some cute earrings for you.ā
Such a Plan A girl, you think, smiling at her as you open the bag: a sultry tank top, black mini skirt, and your mile high boots that you know and love. At the bottom thereās a little baggie full of jewelry.
āThanks, Sare.ā You shuffle to slip your heels off, nudging Rafe's shoulder on accident as you do so.Ā
He nearly winces when you take the black mini skirt and starts to roll it on under your long, expensive dress, catching a glimpse of your dainty underwear. Next, you let the shoulder straps slip down your goosebump covered arms.
Then, with complete fucking nonchalance, you turn your back to Rafe, cheekily looking over your shoulder at him.
āZip?ā
Rafe stares wide-eyed back at you, his gaze flicking between your dress zipper and your smug expression.
His heart races in his ribcage at the thought of you changing in front of all of these people with no question. Itās nothing he hasnāt seen before, but the fact that you're ready to completely undress in the back of this dingy van has his head spinning.Ā
JJ snorts, bringing him back down to Earth. āShe asked you a question, Country Club. Angel, want me to do it?ā
That snaps Rafe out of his trance. His nimble fingers immediately go to the zipper, delicately pulling it down. āDonāt play around, Maybank.ā
āCC, youāre my favorite person to play around with.ā
āWatch it.ā
You roll your eyes at the two. āAlright, brats, letās simmer. Now, I was thinkingāā
Rafe tunes out the rest of what you say when you let your dress slip down off your shoulders, exposing a strapless bra barely fucking covering anything as your long dress pools down on the dirty van floor. Continuing to yap about whatever notes you have, you grab the sultry tank top from the bag and pull it over your head, not breaking your thought process while Rafe's thoughts have been completely broken to begin with.
He coughs quietly to himself to get his shit together, especially when you unapologetically adjust your bra and tank top to how you want it.Ā
Now dressed, you shift again to sit back down on your ass, brushing Rafe's shoulder once more.
But Pope takes a wild turn, everyone shifting from the force of it. John B. smacks his head on the window as Sarah plummets into him, JJ holds his own as he grabs onto the door handlebar, and you fly into Rafe's lap, his hands instinctively thrown up to catch you, or at least attempt to, as you scramble to get up.Ā
āFuck, sorry,ā you murmur, placing a hand on his thigh to push yourself up. āYou good?ā
But JJ's laugh interrupts. āOh, heās great.ā He holds his fingers up to wiggle at Rafe again, wearing a shit eating grin that, pathetically, turns the tips of Rafe's ears pink.Ā
He ignores it. āYou wanna see great?ā
You sit back down on the floor in your original spot, sliding on your socks and boots. āBoys, play nice. Youāll have to get used to each other at some point because youāre both not going anywhere.ā
Kiara pipes up from the front seat. āMaybe we can lock them in a closet together. Thatās what John B. and Sarah do whenever they fight.āĀ
āUsually we end up fucking instead of actually making up, but, who knows? That could probably work for you guys, too,ā John B. chides, earning a slap to the chest from Sarah.
Rafe rolls his eyes so hard it kickstarts a migraine.Ā
He feels your hand brushing his thigh as you laugh and, despite his rising temper, it manages to relax Rafe just a fraction. Especially when you lean more into his arm. Christ, your perfume scent is the only thing he can think about.Ā
Then, Pope makes a screeching halt and everyone is thrown around once more. Before you can fly across the van into Sarah, Rafe grabs you by the waist and pulls you flush against him.
Everyone waits a beat, then two, then sigh in relief when they realize the van isnāt going to be moving anymore.Ā
Pope turns around with a giant grin. āWeāre here, andiamo!ā
Everyone blankly stares at him, hair askew and clothes out of place. He frowns at the crowd.Ā
āWhat? At least I got us here with ten minutes to spare!ā
It only takes one minute for shit to hit the fan.Ā
Itās already unnerving enough for Rafe to realize where they are: in a dingy basement nightclub in the shitty part of the Cut where he normally wouldnāt even think about coming to.
A slice of anger rises in his throat, to cuss you (and Sarah) out for being so reckless if this is where you've been spending all of your time, in a place that doesnāt feel safe to him in a part of town that isnāt meant for girls like you.
He hates thinking like that, knowing damn well you're capable of protecting yourself ā Henry Kennedy's permanently crooked nose can attest to that ā but thereās a sliver of primitive instinct in him that wants to constantly protect you, shield you from everything and everyone.Ā If he ever found out something happened to you in a place like this, there's no question that he'd burn it to the ground.
Rafe's hand ghosts over the small of your back when they enter the venue, which earns a finger wiggle from JJ, teasing him. Thank god you don't see it, or Rafe wouldāve really had to punch the fucker in the face.Ā
But the play timeās over when the group watches the slot before them get on stage, the Pogues (including you) collectively booing them and flipping them off. Rafe looks around to see if anyoneās pissed at the Pogues for, once again, creating a public disturbance, but they just sort of let it happen.Ā Ā
You nudge Rafe, nodding to the lead singer who all but gropes the microphone. āThatās Freddie.ā
Rafe studies Freddie: tiny, skinny, shaggy hair and a crooked smile thatās directed right to you. It sends a shiver down his spine, and he immediately straightens up protectively, sizing the scrawny guy up and down, narrowing his fixated gaze as Freddie grabs the mic and introduces their band with a deeper voice than Rafe expected to come out of him.Ā
āYou know,ā JJ nudges Rafe as if theyāre best buds and he darts his gaze from the spot JJ nudged back up to the blond boy to try and find the audacity in the space between, āAngel here beat him up once. It was one of the greatest things Iāve ever seen in my life. I won ten bucks out of it.ā
Rafe quizzically looks between JJ and you, stunned.Ā
JJ laughs. āWhat? You didnāt think his teeth are naturally that fucked up, did you?ā
But his attention leaves the nuisance and solely focuses on you. Rafe snorts, suppressing a beaming grin. āSnips, how hard did you hit the guy?ā
āWhat?ā You feign innocence, shrugging as if the thought of it doesn't make Rafe's head spin. āI hit him as hard as he deserved. He did touch my ass.ā
Rafe stills.Ā
āHe what?ā
āEasy, Rafey. I took care of it,ā you joke. Then you notice the stone cold glare in Rafe's eye as he sizes Freddie up and down, suddenly frowning and grabbing his hand to pull him out of the trance. āRafe. Jesus. Donāt actually kill the guy.ā
JJ's cackle just pisses Rafe off even more, especially when he claps a big, audacious hand on Rafe's tense shoulder. āYou know, I wasnāt sure what part Country Club would play in our show tonight. But I think we just found our new bodyguard.ā
You squeezes Rafe's hand once. Twice. He relaxes his shoulders, shrugging JJ off but still keeping his hold on you.Ā
The glue of the group, Pope, claps his hands together. āPersonally, I donāt give a fuck about Freddieās set. Before I get up there and strangle Rumlow myself for being shady, letās go backstage toāā
All of a sudden, Freddie's band starts playing their set, and the first few notes cause the group to freeze, including you.
āAre theyā?ā John B. starts in disbelief.
Sarah gasps so dramatically it gives Rafe whiplash.Ā
Pope grips his hair so hard it might rip out. āI knew it. I knew something was up. Those cock sucking, donkey bastard motherfuckāāĀ
John B. slams his hand against the wall, cursing. Sarah tilts her head back in frustration. JJ and Kiara attempt to wrangle Pope from jumping on stage from throttling the lead singer. Each Pogue crashes out unexpectedly, though their actions and waterfall curses are drowned out by the amplified music. No one even bats an eye.
Rafe glances from the scene happening with your friends, to the stage, and down to you, brows furrowing in confusion as to why everyone suddenly started crashing out as soon as they stepped in the building, the band on stage playing a song he vaguely recognizes.Ā
āUh, whatās going on?ā
You watch the stage, unnerved. āThey stole our set.ā
Rafe follows your gaze beyond the stage, to a burly guy standing behind the curtain, shrugging at you mockingly in a way that makes Rafe straighten up and fight the urge to pull you to his hip.
āWhat?ā
āOur songs. Fuck.ā You curl your hands in a fist. āOf course Freddie paid for us to get bumped. He knew our setlist, and paid Rumlow to bump us so we wouldnāt have time to figure something else out.ā
Rafe places a cautious hand on your shoulder, testing to see if you'll shake him off. You don't, so he keeps it there and gives a gentle squeeze. āWhy would heā¦do that?ā
āBecause heās an asshole, Country Club,ā JJ jabs, walking into their conversation with a struggling Pope under his bicep in a headlock. āHe knew weād beat him so he fucked us over.ā
John B. joins the circle, clenching and unclenching his fists. āWhatās our play?ā
āKill Freddie with a gun,ā Pope quips from his headlock, trying to break free but failing.Ā
Kiara places a hand on Pope's head and Sarah follows, as if theyāre trying to summon something. āUse that brain of yours. Think about something other than murdering Freddie for one second.ā
Itās JJ who speaks up. āWhat about using the same set from Greengate?ā
āWe canāt reuse those songs, Jay,ā Kiara murmurs, lost in thought. āWeād get points off.ā
āWhat about āIād Rather Dieā?ā Sarah suggests, rubbing Pope's head like a crystal ball.Ā
Kiara's face upticks in disgust. āThat song is way too outdated. The ratio between boys and girls is too drastic, we need more girls here for that song to hit.ā
āPink Floyd?ā John B. suggests. āOr even Zeppelin. Something to get people on their feet.ā
Rafe watches the group like a tennis match, gaze shifting from person to person as they spew out ideas that ultimately get rejected due to some reasonable excuse. He can feel their anxiety radiating off of them, bubbling in the air between them. He hates the way your brow is permanently furrowed, lost in thought yet pinched a fraction in worry.
Sure, he has no idea whatās going on, nor can he really offer any help, but he hates the dejected look on your face.Ā
Before he can speak and embarrass himself, Pope squeaks from underneath JJ's arm.Ā
āWhat about our originals?ā
The group ceases their arguing, freezing as the only sound heard is Freddieās not-so-bad singing voice, singing their songs. They gawk at each other, waiting for someone to bring up a counter argument but no one offers one.
Noticing the contemplation, Pope wiggles to free himself from the headlock and JJ eventually lets him, joining the circle and stretching his neck from the kinks. He shoots JJ a glare that has him throwing his hands up in surrender.Ā
āIt could work,ā Pope defends cautiously. āI have the hard drive with all the backing vocals on it. Weāll still have Sarah, Kie, and JJ on backup vocals, but I can relay Angel's adlibs and prerecorded harmonies during the performance.ā
Pope's the tech guy, Rafe realizes. The guy behind the curtain, and it suddenly makes so much sense why his anxiety was severely heightened on the drive here: he has to manage the sound check, the back tracks, the entire performance. Despite the guy being a little crazy, Rafe canāt help but nod in respect despite the tense moment. The group is right to elect him as the brains of the group.Ā
You speak up so quietly Rafe barely hears you. āWeāve never shown anyone our originals.ā
Nerves prick at your voice, straining it.
It doesnāt take an idiot to notice your apprehension, even Rafe, who has no idea whatās happening. You don't even want to look at him, at the concerned look you know heās wearing.
Thereās a lot of fear surrounding the originals, mainly because theyāre your originals that you wrote sporadically in journals over the last few months, never expecting the words to actually see the light of day. Recording and creating their own originals was more of a passion project, something never meant for the general public to hear.
Especially when the words on the page were mainly about the guy standing next to you.Ā
What if theyāre not as good as your friends say they are? What if the recordings donāt match up with the live audio? What if the judges and crowd hate it, ruining their chances of winning the competition and getting the money?Ā
Kiara is the first to move towards you, gripping your hand so tight it hurts. āWe should. We all worked really hard on them.ā
āKieās right,ā Sarah pipes up. āPlus, it kind of gives us an advantage. Shows people we actually give a shit, and weāll surprise them.ā She leans against John B., who wraps an arm around her and holds tightly.Ā
Pope holds his arms out in a well? gesture.Ā
JJ beams, latching one hand onto Rafe's shoulder and the other on John B's, shaking them as he whoops.
Rafe almost shoves him off with his death glare alone, annoyed with his assumed immunity since you'd break up any sort of fighting that could happen. Plus, he's really trying to be on your good side, to get back in your good graces, even if this blond fuck is making it really, really difficult not to drop everything and deck him across the face right now.
āIām all in. I vote we do āGuilty Pleasureā, āTransparentsoulā, and āMisery Businessā. Those will get the crowd bumping.ā
You snap her head up. āYouāre kidding.ā
āNope. And in that order.ā
Pope nods. āThat works. I can do that.ā His anxious gaze darts from the stage and back to the circle. āI need to know right now so I can start setting it up. Pinkies?ā
JJ holds his left pinky up first, his hand still resting on Rafe's tall shoulder. He attempts to tickle Rafe's ear until he gets shoved off. John B. holds up his pinky, actually sticking it in JJ's ear. Sarah and Kiara follow, wiggling their pinkies at you, who hasnāt held up anything yet.
With a sigh of great reluctance, your eyes meet Rafe's for a fraction of a second before you hold up your own pinky, grimacing when JJ whoops.Ā
āCountry Club, you in?ā
Rafe blinks out of his daze of staring at you, looking up to face the group who are all looking at him in expectation. His heart skips a beat. āUh, whā?ā
JJ nods towards his hand. āBodyguards get a say too. Whatās your move?ā
Rafe hates the way his face feels warm, and he thanks the world silently for making it dark in this venue. He clears his throat to push away the feeling, holding up his pinky without much convincing as he looks over to you, gazing up at him with your big pleading eyes that makes the room spin.Ā
Pope claps. āOkay. Good. You guys head back and go to our room, the guitars are in there and so are John B's sticks. CC, you stay with me.ā
You grab Rafe's hand quickly, giving it a reassuring squeeze and you're not sure if itās for him or yourself. Your palms start to grow sweaty due to the pressure of the upcoming performance, so you drop his hand as fast as you grabbed it. Rafe nearly whines at the loss.Ā
Everyone except Pope starts to move, and instinctively Rafe follows you like a lost puppy, but a strong hand backhands his bicep and Rafe stops, looking at Pope, the culprit who wears a confused look.Ā
āYouāre CC now, you hear me?ā Pope commands.
Rafe nearly laughs in his face at this five foot something spitfire barking orders at him, but his smirk slowly fades when he sees the craziness behind Pope's eyes.
He remembers the way he drove the band here, nearly killing all of them, as well as how he was seconds away from jumping the stage and taking out everybody in his line of sight, an aura of scrappiness surrounding him that makes Rafe believe he would rough up anyone in his path as a street rat would protect its food.
He decides that Pope is not the kind of guy you want on your bad side, not because of physical strength but because his mind would probably come up with something deeply concerning to torture you with.Ā
Rafe straightens, expression turning serious as he just nods stupidly.
That satisfies Pope. āCāmon. We need to set up.ā
To say that the tech stuff is confusing is an understatement, itās a foreign language.
But Pope seems to know what heās doing, and all Rafe can do is watch, ask questions that he probably assumes are stupid due to the way Pope snorts as if thereās an obvious answer, and scan the crowd looking for you. Heās unnerved that he doesnāt know where you are, especially when he knows you've been hit on quite ferociously before, which makes his cheek hurt from the way heās biting it. He doesnāt have a great view of the crowd but tries to crane his neck to see out from the side of the stage.Ā
All he sees is Freddieās band exiting the stage, right towards them. His black beaded eyes meet Rafe's piercing blues, and he straightens up, fury bubbling in his chest after remembering what he did to you. His girl.
Freddie sleazily sizes Rafe up and down before clapping Pope on the shoulder. āYou guys hire a guard dog?ā
āYeah, something like that,ā Pope mumbles distractedly, his eyes not leaving his computer and sound board panel in front of him. āNice set, by the way. Sounded familiar.ā
āAh, that old thing?ā the douchebag laughs. āCame up with it all on my own. Just another stroke of my ingenuity.ā He then pauses, noticing Rafe's button down rolled up to his elbows and dress pants, which makes him chuckle darkly. āLookinā pretty Kook-y for a lap dog. Wanna twirl for me, pretty?ā
āCareful,ā warns Pope, still fumbling with his sound board. āHe bites.ā
Freddie holds his hands up in surrender and it takes everything in Rafe not to knock the guy out cold where he stands. Noticing the gleam of unbridled fury in Rafe's gaze, Freddie takes a step back, partly in fear. āAlright, Iāll heel.ā He finally looks at Pope as he stalks away. āCanāt wait to see what you guys planned.ā
His words fade as he disappears into the crowd, Rafe noticing he's immediately handed a drink and a girl saunters into his other arm. He scoffs, fingernails digging so harshly into his palms heās sure to draw blood.
The thought of that douchebag laying so much as a fingertip on you makes his blood boil, his heart lurching in his throat in regret that he didnāt lay out the bastard while he had the chance.Ā
āAt ease, CC,ā Pope murmurs. āYouāll get a crack at him one day. But not right now. Here, I need you to hold this button for me.ā
After completing Pope's various tasks, the lights dim on stage. It piques Rafe's attention as he sees five silhouettes sneak onto the platform, noticing the glittery undertones of your top as you march right up to the mic.
The lights fade in ever so slowly, but the crowd recognizes them instantly as they begin to hoot and holler and cheer in a way that surprises Rafe. He reels and suppresses a beaming smile that, holy shit, his girl isā¦kinda famous?Ā
āHi Gallyās,ā you purr into the mic, the vibrato making Rafe's heart skip a beat. You look so goddamn pretty it hurts. āDidnāt expect to see us so soon, hm?ā
The crowd jeers at your improv. You twirl the mic chord and whimsically stalks back and forth on stage, playing into the bit.Ā
āNow, I know you guys love to hear the stuff we usually play, and I only know that because of all the free drinks we get after we finish.āĀ
Someone in the crowd whistles, causing you to breathlessly chuckle into the mic.Ā
āAnd as much as we appreciate your love, we thought weād do something a little different tonight. Instead of covers, weāll be singing our own stuff. Hope you enjoy.ā
Rafe catches a glimpse of Freddieās face in the crowd and stifles a laugh. Thereās no longer teasing amusement coating his eyes, instead itās fear.
And if you're nervous, Rafe canāt tell because you carry yourself as a beaming enigma that canāt be brought down, a supernova. Your cheshire cat smile is enough to pierce through any heart willing to give into you.Ā
JJ's on guitar and he meets Pope's gaze, who counts down on his fingers, three, two, one, then Pope hits a button as JJ plays the opening notes to the song. Rafe realizes Pope cued backtrack vocals, a soprano yodeling fading into the audio. It starts slow, the spotlight beaming onto you as you start to sing low and sultry.
You get to a particular line that has Rafe raising his brows: āI fantasize what we would do, and how would it taste and the way you moveāā
His breath hitches.
ā--Oh, but some good girls do bad things too,ā you sing slowly.Ā
Damn you, because you find Rafe's eyes and throw him a quick wink that has his knees nearly buckling.
You spin around to face the crowd as the lights beam on, coating the entire stage as everyone gets cued in. John B's on drums, Sarah's on backing vocals and keyboard, Jackieās on his guitar, Kiara's on backing vocals and the bass.Ā
āI want this like a cigarette. Can we drag it out and never quit? And, oh my god, you are heaven sent with your dirty mind, yeah, youāre perverted.ā
The song is good. Too good. The people in the crowd are feeling it, cheering and jumping and clinking beers. It could also be the way you're bending over and twirling on stage like you own the place, regardless of rhyme or reason or anything under the sun.Ā
Rafe watches you with a stupid grin that he canāt suppress, because here you are in all of your glory.
He canāt believe this is what he was missing out on, this is what you've been up to: looking too damn fine in a mini skirt and boots with a voice like honey, spice, and nothing nice, especially with that glint of trouble in your eye that means you're up to no good.Ā
āFeels like pornography watching you try on jeans,ā you sing after the guilty pleasure chorus, and it has him reeling.Ā
You've totally been jean shopping with him before on multiple occasions. You always claimed to know what style was trending so you insisted on accompanying him whenever you felt his pants were getting a little outdated.
Rafe never thought anything of it, as you both went out and bought stuff together all the time, tried on clothes in the same dressing room, gave opinions on items and then went about their day as if nothing was intimate about it.
āYouāre a pothead, youāre a cinephile, itās been a while since you turned up the dial.ā
Jesus, he knows heās wearing a ridiculous expression on his face as his mind catches up to the notion that, shit, is there any way this is about him?
Rafe's head spins with two distinct things: is this about him, and if the answer is yes, then, holy shit, do you like him? Is he your guilty pleasure? Do you feel the same? Have you suppressed years of a school-girl crush like he has in fear of fucking up the one good thing in his life? Have you both been wasting all this time dancing around each other, caught up in the will-they, wonāt-they?
Then he freezes. He doesnāt know if you wrote this one. It easily could've been Sarah or Kiara. Why would you? Why would he automatically assume that?
Rafe sucks in a breath of clarity. He shouldnāt assume itās about him just because you're the one singing it. Maybe Sarah did write it about John B.. Disgustingly, Rafe wouldnāt be surprised, with the way that they look at each other.Ā
After a whole chorus of disassociated reeling, Pope nudges Rafe, shaking him from his trance as you keep on vexxing. "Chill. Itās about you. No need to stress.ā
Rafe coughs, covering up his dumbfounded expression as he watches you in a different light now, a deeper one.
The bridge is just a vocal array of chaos, Sarah and Kiara and even fucking JJ belting yeahs as you fucking yodel, voice breaking in and out of pitch as you shut her eyes, avoiding looking in Rafe and Pope's direction. You belts your last hey, the chords in your neck prominent as you pour your soul into the note.
The backing vocals, the prerecorded harmonies, your powerful beltā itās all too much and the realization hits him like a truck.Ā
Heās in love with you.Ā
You suck in a big breath after your long note, diving right back in. āYou give me guilty, guilty pleasure.ā
You repeat the line, over, and over, and over again until you build up to the end, āPleasure, pleasure.ā
Then you suck in a big breath, practically moaning, āPleasure!ā
The crowd wastes no time roaring their applause, hooting and hollering tremendously louder than they did for Freddieās performance. You're spinning, as you can barely see three feet in front of you with the spotlight being so bright.
You instinctively looks backstage to Pope to see when heās cueing the next song, but instead locks eyes with Rafe's piercing blues, wearing a smile so fucking big it makes your heart melt. You feel your cheeks burning red, that song written from the confinements of your journal, not that you'll ever tell him that.
But with the way heās beaming, you have a feeling that he already pieced it together.Ā
You jump right into āTransparentsoul, starting off with a crazy drum riff that John B. formulated when he was drunk off three margaritas. Itās manic, but fuck, it works too well. You get right back into it, riffing and belting as if your life depends on it. John B's performance is one to note for the books, helping craft a nearly impossible song for drummers to replicate. He switches back and forth from double time, half time, and then free styling in the short breaks in-between right before the chorus.Ā
The three thumps of the drums and the lingering note from you end the song, sucking in a big breath to steady yourself. The crowd goes crazy, most people pointing to John B. and cheering for him. Sarah walks over to him, placing a messy kiss on his lips that leaves a red lipstick mark on his grinning smile, to which Rafe involuntarily rolls his eyes.
They take their places for the last song, āMisery Businessā, and you nod to Pope to start the track that begins with a non-instrumental lead.Ā
Then JJ and Kiara jump into the riffs, this song being more punk rock that allows you room to show some attitude, and attitude you'll give as you see the dejected look on Freddieās face, angrily sipping his beer with a blonde bimbo hanging off his arm.Ā
You wrote this one, the lyrics and melody originally being slower and more of a sad ballad.
Pathetically, itās about Rafe and one of his past girlfriends that you just couldnāt fucking stand for the life of you. Sheād ice you out, make you look stupid in front of your friends, belittle you, cling onto Rafe as if he was going to fly away with her and start a life in a different country.
She couldnāt handle being Rafe's second girl, so you showed her what it means to be his first choice, always.
It was originally slower, pitiful, and regretful. But when JJ read them during their pitch meeting, he said it feels angry, vengeful, hateful, and you liked the idea of making it a power ballad. Sure, it strains your vocals on the practical screams, but itās all for the show. All to emulate the emotion.Ā
And, god, if Rafe doesnāt smirk the entire time.
He knows this oneās about him because you've fully said to him once that his misery business is finally over, when he told you that he broke up with Ada, his girlfriend of eight months.
Usually heās the one dripping in jealously when it comes to you, shit, he could barely handle you spending all your time with different friends that werenāt him, but here you are ā wearing green like itās meant for you. And, dammit, if you don't rock green.Ā
They hit the bridge, and JJ and Kiara absolutely shred it for a few bars until you get real nice and close to the microphone.
āWhoa, I never meant to brag, but I got him where I want him now.āĀ
Your vocals riff up the line, throaty and raw and angry.Ā
Oh, and Rafe cannot wait to tease you about this one. He gets (and deserves) an eyeroll when he turns to Pope with a stupid smirk. āThis oneās also about me.ā
āCongratulations,ā Pope deadpans before focusing back on the board.Ā
You belt out another note, then delivering your last line with that same sultry tone you began the night with. There isnāt even a moment of silence between the end of the song and when the crowd starts cheering ā no ā roaring in applause.
You linger in it for a moment, taking a breath of relief when you see that they like it. They actually like your stuff. You feels JJ clap a hand on your shoulder, shaking it back and forth in excitement, as Kiara comes up to bow while Sarah ambushes John B.Ā
You can barely see out in the crowd anyway, the spotlight being unbearable. Taking a step back from the front, you glance over to Rafe and Pope.
Pope prays up to the sky like he always does when he orchestrates another successful performance. And Rafe...
Rafe just stands there with his arms crossed, a cheeky smirk splayed on his lips. That dress shirt does him wonders, and you have to physically roll your eyes in order to tear your gaze away from him.Ā
Finally, finally, they exit the stage towards Pope and Rafe as the announcer comes up to say that thereās one more band going on before they pick the winners for Stonepit.
Rafe murmurs a good job to everyone ā even JJ ā as they pass by him. Realistically, heās waiting for one person who happens to exit the stage last.
And for someone who was so confident and sultry on stage, you sure look sheepish as you approach him.Ā
Rafe tucks a stray piece of hair behind your ear, feeling a fresh sense of confidence that he certainly didnāt have before the performance.
āYou couldāve warned me that you were some kind of rockstar.ā
āStop,ā is all you can muster, fighting a smile.Ā
āWhat? Donāt get all shy on me now.ā
You playfully shove him away, but you both know thereās no true malice to it.
The group walks through backstage back to their dressing room. Rafe trails you, this time firmly placing his hand on the small of your back as you weave through other bands and stage managers, and he admits the notion is nothing short of wildly possessive, but he doesnāt care.
You just sang about wanting him twice on stage, so, yeah, heās gonna make sure they all know who it was all about.Ā
The group enters their private room, two giant couches and an open space with empty guitar cases and bags full of clothes and makeup. JJ puts his guitar back in the case and collapses on the couch with a dramatic sigh, his grin wide as day.Ā
Kiara sits next to him, nudging his dropped head so he can readjust for her. āWeāre so fucking winning this thing!ā she yells, JJ whooping and hooting next to her.
John B. and Sarah shack up on the opposite couch as she practically sits on his lap. Pope squeezes in next to them with an annoyed eye roll but knowing smirk. You move to sit on the couch with Kiara and JJ, and motions for Rafe to sit first since thereās only room for one more.Ā
So he does. And when you moves to sit on the arm, he grabs your hips so you're planted firmly on his lap.
You roll your eyes and smack his chest. The act is nothing short of normal, thereās been plenty of times where you've sat like this at one of his parties, at family gatherings, on his boat, you name it. But now thereās a new underlying meaning, especially with the way his fingertips are light as feathers against your hips, almost teasing you.
You decide this is your favorite place to sit. Your throne.Ā
John B. shamelessly fondles Sarah and no one bats an eye. āWe have fifteen minutes until we find out. I dapped Sean up before we came in here, so he should be bringing us drinks.ā
āThank god,ā JJ groans, letting Kiara mess up his hair and Pope's hair reluctantly. Her boys, happy as sinners in church.Ā
āYou guys were fucking crazy,ā Rafe finds himself saying before he can stop himself. You turn your head to look at him softly. āWay better than that piece of shit who went on before you.ā
Pope snorts while everyone looks to Rafe in surprise for even saying anything, Sarah looking lovingly at her brother's words. āCountry Club scared him away without needing to say anything.ā He leans over Kiara to look at JJ. āJJ, I support your decision to elect CC as our official bodyguard. It was great. I didnāt even have to look up or throw a punch or take out my knife or anything. He justā¦fucked right off.ā
JJ hums in satisfaction. āAh. See, CC? You fit right in.ā
Rafe rolls his eyes, but surprisingly thereās no poor intentions behind it. Just mild irritation and a bit of swelling pride.Ā
Suddenly, the door opens and in comes a buff looking guy with a platter full of beers, Sean, Rafe assumes. Sean sets the beer down on the table between the two couches, wordlessly dapping John B. up one more time before exciting the dressing room.Ā
You lean forward to grab two, one for you and one for Rafe, and his grip tightens when you bend down enough for him to see a sliver of underwear peeking through.
But you sit back within a second, back flush against his chest as you hand him a beer. He reluctantly takes a hand off of you to grab it, clinking the bottle to yours and taking a sip.Ā
The group gets lost in conversation about the show, but your gaze focuses on Rafe's, faces inches apart.
Despite the chaotic and irritatingly loud conversation happening in front of them, itās as if you're the only two in the room.
You look into his piercing blues, his gaze softening when he realizes you're not gonna look away and contribute to your friendsā conversation. His hand is searing hot against your hip, especially when his fingertips play with the hem of your top with eased nonchalance that it makes your head spin.
Itās like a second nature to him, to touch you like this, like you're the only thing that matters in this given moment.
To him, you are.Ā
God, you missed this. Itās embarrassing how much you do. You know you shouldnāt have, but your dignity is already out the window because you, frankly, forgave him as soon as he brought you on that dance floor.Ā
āWhatāre you thinkinā, Snips?ā he murmurs, a contrast from the yelling going on around them.Ā
You purr, the adrenaline from earlier starting to wear off. āIām happy you came tonight,ā is all you say without giving in that easy, even though he probably knows how much you missed him from that performance alone.Ā
His gaze alternates from looking into your eyes and your lips. He hums, almost distant. āThank you for letting me. Thank you for sharing it with me, even if itās just for tonight.ā
Your posture straightens when you feel his hand smoothly running up your back, leaving your hip and making it all the way to your flaming cheek, brushing that stray piece of hair away from your face once more and tucking it behind your ear, careful not to brush against any of the piercings that he definitely hasnāt noticed before. Rafe's hand comes back down to ghost over your cheek, his palm barely caressing it, almost afraid.
But you lean into his touch, making the contact for him. He hums low in his throat, almost in praise.Ā
Rafe's next words send shivers down your spine. āCouldnāt take my eyes off you tonight. Especially when you were singinā about me.ā
Your cheeks unabashedly turn a deep shade of red. āI donāt know what youāre talking about.ā
Out of embarrassment because, fuck, you got caught, you go to pull away from his hold but he slides his thumb to your chin and grabs your face gently, holding your gaze to his.Ā
āBaby, if watching me try on jeans got you all hot and bothered, you couldāve just said so. Instead of, you know, writing a song about it,ā he teases as you groan, trying to pull away again but he tightens his grip just slightly. Then, softer, āWhy didnāt you say anything?ā
āProbably had a girlfriend at the time,ā you mumble right back, but a knowing smirk forms on your lips. āWrote another one about that, too. Maybe youāve heard it?ā
Rafe hums in acknowledgement, running his thumb down your chin to the column of your throat, then back up to ghost over your bottom lip.
āMhm. I have. Might need to hear it again, though. The girl who sang it kept distracting me the whole time. Could barely even think straight,ā he admits, his eyes flickering to your lips for a fraction of second before meeting your eyes.Ā
āYeah?ā you challenge quietly.
āYeah,ā he confirms immediately. āCould barely even stand up knowinā you feel the same way.ā
You quirk a brow. āHmm? And what way is that?ā
āThe way I canāt breathe when Iām not with you.ā
Your breath hitches in your throat at the confession, the cool-girl facade fading as you take a second to look at him, to really look at him. Your brows furrow when you take note of the sincerity of his tone, or how his eyes donāt leave yours.
Or how his brow furrows and his lips barely part when he shifts his hips and you can suddenly feel him.Ā
Suddenly you're the only two people in the room, everything else drowning out besides the sound of your syncopated breaths and heartbeats thumping out of ribcages.
Rafe's hand lowers from your face and stalks down your spine, taking its rightful place back on your hip and squeezing ever so slightly. Your beer-free hand instinctively comes up to the back of his neck, fingers splaying on the nape to intertwine with the ends of his longer hair. His chest raises with a particularly deep breath, brushing against your ribcage for a fraction of a moment that sends a shock through your body.Ā
āFuck, theyāre starting the announcement,ā Pope interrupts, causing you and Rafe to jump away from each other of surprise.Ā
Everyone in the group stands, excitedly bouncing towards the door and running out to the backstage. The last one to leave is JJ, who looks back to hold the door open for them but notices you and Rafe unmoved from your position, looking sheepish as if you've already been caught in a scandal.
After a moment of silence, JJ's face changes from confusion to understanding, and he barks out a short laugh.Ā
āAhh. Okay. I get it,ā he teases, quickly glancing at the group leaving before turning back to them with a wink. āIāll put my sock on the doorknob.ā
And with that, JJ shuts the door, leaving you and Rafe in the same emotional position as he did when he left you on the dance floor, the thick tension in the air growing between you as you take a moment to stare at the door, prolonging the inevitable.
Eventually, you move your gaze from the door back to Rafe, whoās already staring at you.Ā
You're nervous all of a sudden, the consequence of flirting and fooling around catching up to you. Months of assuming there were unrequited feelings ā feelings you buried deep down to maintain the strongest friendship you've ever, and probably will ever, have ā being disproved in the matter of the last twenty minutes.
But now heās here, sitting pretty in front of you with such a serious expression on his face that it makes you suck in a deep breath at the intensity of it, the gravity of the situation and where itās about to lead to.
Rafe notices immediately. āHey,ā he says softly, running the pad of his thumb over your hip bone, this time out of comfort. āWe donāt need to do anything.ā Then, he manages a genuine chuckle. āI just got you back. Being with you is enough fāā
He doesnāt get to finish before you're pressing yourself forward, taking the leap of faith and pressing your lips to his.
Rafe makes a noise of surprise, the words dying in his throat as he stays still for a moment, processing that, holy shit, this is happening.Ā
You, however, take his apprehension as rejection, and sheepishly begin to pull away.
But Rafe doesnāt let you as he leans forward to kiss you again, leaning far enough to place his beer on the floor without breaking contact. His new free hand allows him to caress your face, greedily pulling your body closer and closer to his to which you let out a noise of surprise.
He swallows the sound, his hand leaving your chin to slowly trickle down your arm and to your hand, where he takes the beer away and reiterates the same action he did with his bottle, allowing you to have your hands free to roam and touch and feel as you shamelessly make out like your lives depend on it.
Your fingers instantly grasp at his dress shirt, wrinkling the nice material as his other hand smooths up your thigh to grip the base of your ass, shamelessly fondling it like he has every right.
And, fuck, you whine so quietly that he barely hears it, but it makes him twitch underneath you.
The sound is music to his ears, so he does it again, and this time you lift your hips off of him, swinging your leg over to straddle and press back down against him, a sensation that sends warmth to your core and makes your eyes roll back.Ā
āYou taste so fucking sweet,ā he murmurs against your lips before hungrily taking you back in as he shifts underneath you.Ā
Hips stilling, you focus on kissing him fervently first, to which he gladly accepts. Rafe manspreads so god forsaken arrogant that it allows you all this room, but also forces your hips to spread wider.
You test the waters, gradually pushing your thighs down to further mold into his body. The act causes your skirt to push up your legs, your underwear shamelessly meeting his slacks right at the zipper as you grind down into him.Ā
You both moan at the sensation, you stilling with worry that you went too far.
But Rafe death grips your hips as he guides you down again, teasingly urging your body back and forth against him that has you quietly moaning into his mouth. He seizes the opportunity to slip his tongue to meet yours, kisses getting messy, sloppy, dirty. But neither of you seem to care, solely focusing on the high you're both chasing.Ā
Rafe grips your ass and hips so hard itāll probably bruise, refraining from letting his hands do what they normally do and dive in recklessly.
He wants to do this right the only way he knows how ā by slowing himself down. For you, he needs to be patient. The last thing he wants is to scare you off.
But you sense his reluctance, his hesitation, and nearly groan in frustration. You slow down your pace and find his right hand, putting your hand over his.
Rafe tenses in fear of hurting you, but instead you grip his hand and guide it up your body, over the curve of your ass, under your shirt and up your tummy, fingers splaying over your rib cage and, finally, just stopping under the swell of your breast.Ā
His breath hitches, then he hums quietly. āGonna let me touch you there, baby?ā
You nod against his lips. āYes. Anywhere, Rafey. All yours.ā
āAll mine?ā
You nod again, squeezing his hand to wordlessly assure him itās okay. He mirrors your action, giving your breast a test feel and you sigh in relief.
Jesus. He nearly groans at the sound, the feel, the everything thatās happening right now. He doesnāt have a moment to process it because your hands are traveling further and further down his chest until they toy with the belt of his pants.
You tease him, running your fingers delicately under the waistline of his underwear, cool hands smoothing over his warm skin. Rafe unintentionally bucks his hips up at the sensation, his lips parting all pretty in a way that makes you cheshire-cat smile.Ā
āAm I yours, pretty?ā you mumble, low and teasing, relishing in his fucked out gaze at the mere thought of you touching any lower.
He nods dumbly and you reel with the sight of it. It makes your tummy pool with anticipation.
āWill you let me?ā
āFuck, always,ā he manages pathetically, chest heaving as he watches you undo his belt and zipper. Rafe nearly whines when your fingers ghost over his length, barely even touching him and you've got him a writhing mess. āMakinā me go crazy, looking at me like that.ā
You frown, feigning naitivity. āLike what?ā you pout, pressing your thumb to his tip through his boxers that has him gasping in the shell of your ear. āAm I gonna have to ask nicely? Or will you be good?ā
Slowly feeling him up over his boxers, Rafe bites his lip so hard heās sure heās gonna draw blood.
āYouāre being a real fucking brat right now.ā
āHm? Am I?ā
You squeeze around his length, causing him to huff, getting sick of the anticipation and just wanting to pin you down on this couch and make you eat your words. āYes.ā
Then you tilt your head so you can meet his gaze, taking note of his brows furrowed in frustration, and you canāt help but smile for knowing every trick in the book to push his buttons.Ā
āSo punish me then,ā you purr, sending chills down his spine.Ā
Before Rafe can pick you up and throw you down on the dingy couch, the door swings open and his irritation sky rockets as your friends hoot and holler obnoxiously, flooding the room.
Your pretty little fingers leave his boxers and settle on his tummy, your arm shielding the compromising hand placement.
Pope holds an envelope, undoubtedly filled with the money the first place winner is promised, while JJ thrusts a makeshift trophy in the air as if itās the Stanley Cup. John B. holds Sarah bridal style, settling in on the couch across from you. Kiara runs over to the pair, ignoring the scandalous scene in front of her and gripping you by the shoulders and shaking you in such ferocious motion that it makes Rafe wince.Ā
āWe fucking won!ā she shrieks. āThe whole damn thing!ā
You beam, ignoring the fact that your skirt is pushed past your hips and that Rafe's hand is settled on your ass and how his belt is unbuckled. āYouāre kidding?ā
Pope waves the envelope in your face. āYou shouldāa seen Freddieās face. I wish I had a picture of it, Iād print it out and leave it on his doorstep every day for the rest of his life. Stupid fuckinā prick.ā He waves the envelope once in front of your face then in front of Rafe's face, then pulls back and starts doing it to everyone individually.Ā
What makes this whole situation worse for Rafe is that JJ decides to sit right next to you both, exhaling as if heās had a long day at work.
In his nimble fingers, he admires the trophy that looks like a third grader made it, sighing and smiling. You make no effort to move or conceal what you were doing, so Rafe tries to push down your skirt to cover up a little bit with a huff, irritated even further that JJ's arm is brushing against Rafe's.
Oh, the audacity-
āOh! Hey, guys. Didnāt see you here,ā JJ says. He holds up the trophy. āYou see this? Pretty fucking sick, right?ā
āIt would still be pretty fucking sick if you were three feet away from us,ā Rafe spats, gripping onto you so tight to hold back from knocking his teeth in.
JJ pushes his luck by gasping and nudging Rafe's shoulder. āAw? You like it, too? I knew you had a soft spot, Country Club.ā
You laugh, chest bumping Rafe's in the process. āJJ, you couldāve at least knocked to let us know you guys were back,ā you scold playfully, wrapping your arms around Rafe's neck and smushing your cheeks together, which makes the situation a little better.
Besides, it gives Rafe a better grip on your skirt, pulling it down over your ass successfully.
āOh, please,ā JJ chuckles. āNo one gives a shit if you were fist deep in here. Sarah and John B. basically fuck all the time in front of us. Weāve seen more scandalous stuff than this, guys.ā JJ gestures to their position. āHonestly, itās a bit prude in comparison. We were brainstorming that there would at least be an ass in the air,ā he teases, then wiggles his fingers at Rafe, āwhose ass, we didnāt specify.ā
Rafe seethes. āAnybody ever tell you to shut the fuck up and mind your own business?ā
āAll the time, actually.ā
Rafe rolls his eyes and you hum in contentment, knowing that this is going to be their version of getting along from now on.Ā
The group lingers in the room for another hour or so, as you remain in your rightful place on Rafe's lap with the exception of getting up to use the bathroom with Sarah.
During your absence, JJ relentlessly teased Rafe when he fixed his slacks and belt to zip them back up. John B. jabbed that, hey, at least he was getting some, and for that he earned Rafe's slight respect.
Pope had complained that it wasnāt anything they werenāt used to seeing, then shooting John B. the most diabolical glare he could muster. Kiara had cooed that it was nice to see you so giddy and smiley, and Rafe liked the way it made him feel.Ā
Rafe can, truly, complain all he wants, but your friends arenāt that bad.
With the exception of JJ being the most annoying human being to grace the planet, but the others are situationally tolerable, including his sister who he (really) enjoys spending time with.
Plus, Rafe likes the smile that you wear when you're around them, a smile once reserved just for him. As much as he wants to be selfish and have it all for himself, he knows what itās like to be on the receiving end of one. Itās glorious. He likes that you share it with the people you care about, even though he really hates sharing.Ā
You come back with Sarah and retake your seat on his lap, Rafe wrapping his arms around your middle to pull you back flush against his chest. He places a gentle kiss on your exposed shoulder, relishing in the moment.
You turn to look at him, a soft look in your eye.Ā
āHi,ā you say quietly, bringing your hand up to brush some hair out of his face.Ā
āHey, Snipsā he responds even quieter, resting his chin against your shoulder. He notices your sleepy expression and manages a small smile. āTired?āĀ
You nod slowly, mirroring his smile. āHad a long day, if you could imagine.ā
He hums. āHm. No. Wanna tell me about it?ā
You yawn, and before you can say anything, someone claps.
āThatās our cue,ā Pope interrupts, suddenly standing. āEveryone in the van.ā
Everyone groans, JJ louder than everybody else. āNo! Cāmon, man weāre just gettingāā he interrupts himself with his own yawn, ā--started.ā
Pope simply shakes his head.
Minutes later, theyāre all in the car packed to the brim with bodies and equipment. A little while later, the van stops in front of your house, the low whir of the engine being the only thing heard on the quiet street. Pope shuts the lights off and puts the car in park, John B. opening the heavy door with ease.Ā
Pope turns around to look at Rafe awkwardly. āYou, uh, going home? I can drop you off with Sarah.ā
You stand and exit the van, speaking before Rafe can. āHe's staying with me,ā you say, shooting Rafe a knowing look.Ā
Rafe quietly sighs in relief, since the idea of going home alone crossed his mind more than once and he did not like the thought one bit. So, without further coaxing, he exits the van behind you and slides an arm around your waist.Ā
āUh, congrats on tonight,ā Rafe says awkwardly. āIt was great.ā
āSuch enthusiastic words, Country Club,ā JJ taunts. āWe were serious about that bodyguard offer if youāre up for it. Unless youāre scared of jackasses like Freddie.ā
āYou just canāt get enough of me, huh, Maybank?ā
You roll her eyes, lazily pushing Rafe towards your house. āOkay, recess is over. Iāll see you guys on Sunday for the fire.ā
The group choruses a goodbyes to Rafe, goodbye Country Club to Rafe (along with a quiet yet grateful 'bye, Rafe' from Sarah), and the two of you head up the driveway towards your house.Ā
You both sneak in the way you've always snuck in, climbing up the porch gate and onto your balcony (with Rafe's help, of course), as you quietly slip into the confinements of your room. Granted, your heavily decorated bedroom is on the opposite side of the house from your parentsā but you're always extra careful to avoid any suspicion.Ā
Standing in the dimly lit room, you sigh and shut your eyes, fatigue coming over you more harshly than you'd prefer, swaying gently when you feel Rafe's cool hands steadying you on your hips.
Then, you feel him hug you, his broad shoulders caging you in as he rubs his hands up and down your back soothingly, placing a chaste kiss on the crown of your head.Ā God, it feels so nice and your knees nearly give out at how much you missed this, missed him.
āLetās go to bed, yeah?ā
You nod against his chest, drunk off the way you feel in his arms, letting him gently push you to sit on the edge of the bed while he grabs your favorite pajamas from the bottom drawer.
He comes back over to you, kneeling in front as he sets the pajamas down next to you. First he unzips your boots, delicately pulling your feet out of the shoe and rolling your socks off over her heel and past your toes.Ā
Once theyāre off, Rafe gently taps her knee. āHey. Your pajamas are ready.ā
You pout. āCan you do it?ā
Rafe lazily grins, his hands running up and down your thighs gingerly. āOf course, baby. Arms up.ā
You do as you're told, raising your arms over your head as Rafe pushes your tank top up past your rib cage, over your bra, and up over your shoulders until itās off. It leaves you in your bra, one that he caught a glimpse of earlier in the van, but he doesnāt move to pull it off.
Instead, Rafe grabs your pajama shirt, pulling it over your head and covering your torso protectively, then he reaches behind and unclasps the strapless bra, which falls into putty in his hands. He tosses it carelessly to the side.
Rafe pats your thigh gently. āCan you stand for a second?ā
You whine in protest, but again do what you're told, pushing yourself up to stand while Rafe stays on his knees. He pushes your mini skirt down your thighs until it pools at your ankles, making him eye level with your core for a fraction of a moment. It doesnāt last long before heās coaxing your feet to step through the pajama shorts, pulling them up your legs until they rest comfortably on your hips.Ā
He presses a chaste kiss to the back of your hand before standing, making his way into your en-suite bathroom to rifle through the drawers, looking for makeup wipes. When Rafe finally finds them, he brings it out to you and gingerly rubs circles on your cheeks, forehead, neck, all over to get the remnants of tonight off your pretty face.
Discarding the wipe in your bedside trash bin, Rafe pushes stray hair pieces out of your face. āAll done. You ready?ā
You nod gratefully, crawling onto the bed and slipping under the covers on your usually side of the mattress. Rafe quickly undresses out of his dress shirt and slacks, leaving him in his underwear ā his normal attire for whenever he sleeps over ā turning off the bedside lamp before sliding in next to you, practically caging you in.Ā
Furrowing your brows in confusion, you hum when you notice the lights are off. Although the befuddlement doesn't translate, because Rafe settles in, wrapping an arm around you and slowly rubbing circles on your back as he slowly gets comfortable in a bed he missed so damn much.Ā
āWait, hang on,ā you murmur against his neck, āthe lightās off.ā
āAnd?ā
āWell, Iā¦ā
āYou wanna sleep with the light on?ā
You nearly groan in frustration. āAre we not⦠finishing what we started earlier?ā
Instead of initiating like you want, Rafe simply chuckles, the vibrato rumbling your nerves. He pulls you flush against his chest. āNo, baby. Get some rest.ā
āButā¦ā You trail off pathetically, almost whining. āI want to.ā
āYouāre tired.ā
You fight a yawn. āNo, Iām not.ā
āSnips,ā he warns. āSleep.ā
āUgh, Rafe.ā
He says your name mockingly, his tone insinuating heās wearing a lazy grin.Ā
Your shoulders sag against him as you huff, fanning hot breath over his chest. If you were standing, you probably wouldāve stomped your foot, and he definitely would've poked fun at your desperation.Ā
But not tonight, because the way heās holding you, shit, you can feel yourself sinking into the mattress.
Nonetheless, you reach out to press a palm on his chest, yawning once more but gently slapping him for emphasis on your next promise.
āFine. But in the morning, Iām giving you the best head of your life.ā
Rafe chuckles, amused at your determination. āBrat. Go to sleep.ā
Itās pouring and i find myself at her door just like all those times before, Iām not sure how i got there itās like all roads they lead me here.
My y/n, is getting married in two weeks- how did we get here? How can i just let her go?
Sure, we foughtāa lot. But we always found our way back to each other, didnāt we? It wasnāt healthy and itās not normal for couples to break up a thousand time and get back together again, I know that. But maybe nothing about us was ever normal. And that never changed the fact that I truly love her.
A warm light spills from her bedroom window, casting a glow onto the wet pavement. I figured sheās home.
I ring the bell before I can talk myself out of it, my heart pounding louder than the rain.
A few beats later, the door swings open. And there she is.
"Rafe?" Her voice is laced with exhaustion, eyes widening in disbelief. āWhy are you here?ā
āI donāt know whatās gotten into me..all i know is i just walked here all the way from my house.ā I swallow hard, searching for the right words. "I need to talk to you, okay?"
She exhales sharply, shaking her head. āRafe,how much more is there to say? Iām so tired of this. Weāre done. Weāve been done. Iām literally getting married in two weeks.ā
āI know,ā I say quickly. āThatās why Iām here. Just please, hear me out.ā
āNo.ā She steps back, her voice firm. āIām not playing this game anymore. Just go home.ā
Sheās about to shut the door but I stopped her, āplease y/n, this is the last time okay I promise,ā I plead, my voice laced with desperation. āIām not here to fight or ask you take me back. This time i really want to apologize for my wrongdoings and clear everything up, okay?ā
She shakes her head, āi think Iāve heard enough apologies over the past years from you, Rafe. Iām not interested in hearing another one,ā she says with cold detachment.
āGo back home,ā she orders before shutting the door.
I take a deep breath, closing my eyes as the rain continues to drench me.
"I'm not leaving," I say, loud enough for her to hear through the door. "Not until you hear me out. I donāt care if I freeze out here. Iām not leaving."
Silence. Then, footsteps retreating.
She doesnāt care.
But I do.
I know Iāll regret this if I donāt say what I need to sayāif I donāt try one last time before she gets married and I lose her forever.
Y/nās Pov:
He finds himself at my door just like all those times before. He wears his best apology but I was there to watch him leave.
And all the times i let him in, just for him to go again, disappear when he comes back.
This time Iām done.
I wonāt buy any of his words anymore but standing right before his eyes after no contact for almost two years, I canāt help it. My heart is aching.
After I shut the door behinds me, I try to ignore it. I go back to my room, force myself to stay still. But the longer I sit there, the harder it becomes to ignore the sound of the rain hammering down outside.
Heās still there.
Minutes pass. Maybe more.
And then, against my better judgment, I get up.
I open the door.
Heās shivering, drenched, his lips slightly blue. He looks up at me with those stupidly familiar eyes, and something inside me cracks.
I sigh, stepping aside. āCome in before you get sick.ā This is the last time Iāll let him in my door.
But before I can pull him in, he grabs my hand, his grip firm yet gentle. "Come with me."
He pulls me into the rain āWhat?ā I frown.
āRafe, I just showeredāā
āDance with me.ā
I blink at him. āAre you insane?ā
āI promise y/n, this is the last thing Iāll ever ask from you,ā he says, his voice quieter now, raw and honest. "Just dance with me."
And maybe itās the rain, or maybe itās the way his hands settle around my waist like they belong there, but I let him pull me into a slow danceāright there, in the middle of the downpour.
If anyone would sees us right now, theyād think weāre crazy. Maybe we are.
I know this is wrong.
But in that moment, nothing else exists.
No past. No future. No reasons why. Just us.
The rain begins to slow, turning into a gentle drizzle. And then, in a barely audible whisper, he says, "I probably wonāt be there to ask you for a dance at your wedding⦠so please, let me have this one now."
My breath hitches.
Tears well in my eyes becauseāGodāit hits me. Weāve known each other for so long. Back when we were still friends weāve talked how we gonna be there at each otherās wedding and how I hoped that Iāll marry him when we were together. He will always be my first love.
Now, Iām not marrying him and how I wish he wouldnāt be at the wedding cause I donāt think I could handle seeing his face there.
"Rafeā¦" My voice trembles.
He pulls me closer, resting his forehead against mine, his hands shaking. "Iām too much of a coward to look you in the eyes, so just listen, okay?"
I nod, my heart in my throat.
"I'm sorry for everything," he murmurs. "Weāve known each other for so long. We were best friends before we ever dated, and maybe thatās why I couldnāt accept that we were better off that way. Maybe thatās why I kept holding on, even when I knew we were breaking each other. But I want you to know that Iām happy for you. I really am. You deserve a love that doesnāt hurt. A love thatās easy. And IāI hope he gives you that."
Tears slip down my cheeks.
"This is the last time I'll ever come here. The last time for everything," he continues. "Please be happy. And please⦠please know that I truly love you. Even if weāre just meant to be friends in the end."
I lift my head, finally meeting his gaze.
I donāt know what to say.
Because maybe⦠maybe a part of me still loves him, too.
But I also know this is for the best.
"You will always be my first love, Rafe," I whisper.
A small, broken smile tugs at his lips. He cups my face, pressing his forehead against mine.
And for a moment, I let myself wonder.
If things had been different.
If we had been different.
If it were this lips in front of me that Iād be kissing when I say āI doā in two weeks.
Then, softlyāso softlyāhe presses a lingering kiss to my forehead.
"I'm sorry," he whispers.
And then, he lets go.
He takes a step back.
And just like thatā
With my whole body drenched, tears falling, i watch him walk away.
āThis is the last time.ā
A/N: FINALLY no more draft angstš„³ also Iāve always wanted to slow dance in the middle of the rain to The Last Time hence, the storyš and eid mubarak to those celebrating!
Itās been two days since the Never Have I Ever game stirred things up and the villa is finally back in its rhythm. Bonds are forming, friendships are solidifying and for some, feelings are getting harder to ignore.
This morning, the boys are hitting the gym, hyping each other up between sets, while the girls lounge by the pool, spilling tea and dissecting every look, touch and lingering moment from the past days while also splashing around.Ā
"Rafe, can I talk to you for a sec?" John B waits until Rafe finally drops his weights, breathing hard as he grabs a towel, wiping the sweat from his face and chest. He nods and follows John B toward the kitchen, both of them grabbing cold drinks. John B leans against the counter, settling onto one of the stools.
āI think Iāve got a problem.ā He says casually, cracking open his drink. That catches Rafeās attention. He drops into the seat beside him, brow raising.Ā
āYou good, dude?ā He asks and John B nods.Ā
āYeah, yeah, Iām fine. Itās justā¦ā He hesitates, gaze flicking toward the girls across the villa. āI think I like someone.ā Rafe grins immediately, slapping John B on the back.Ā
āOh, shit! Whoās the lucky one?ā He pulls back, his grin faltering.Ā
āDonāt say-ā āItās not Y/N!ā John B cuts in before Rafe can finish. He glances around, lowering his voice.Ā
āI think I like Sarah.ā He reveals, making Rafeās eyebrows shoot up.Ā
āSarah?ā He asks and John B exhales, rubbing a hand over his jaw.Ā
āWeāve had these moments lately. Like, she gets my humor. And obviously, sheās gorgeousā¦but I donāt know. It just feels like somethingās there.ā
Rafe listens, nodding knowingly, as his gaze shifts toward the pool. His expression softens as he watches Y/N laugh loudly, trying and failing to pinch her nose before Maddy shoves her into the water. A splash erupts and she surfaces, coughing. Rafe chuckles under his breath before turning back to John B.
āOkay, so youāve got a crush. Big deal.ā He shrugs, cracking open his energy drink. John B shakes his head.Ā
āItās complicated, man. You see how Topper looks at her. Heās smitten. And I have no idea how she feels. I could be reading this completely wrong.ā He exclaims. Rafe leans back, tilting his head.Ā
āJB, man, just go for it.ā Rafe says, taking a sip of his drink. āIām sure Top will understand. And I meanā¦if anything goes wrong, there are still plenty of fish in the sea.ā John B nods.
āJust-ā āNot Y/N. Yeah, I know. Don't worry.ā John B shakes his head. āNot my type, anyways.āĀ
Rafe glances back at the pool, where Y/N is now floating on her back, laughing as Maddy tries to dunk her again. His smirk lingers for a second before he looks back at John B.Ā
āGood.ā He replies. āI mean, she's out of your league anyways.ā John B chuckles at Rafe's comment and walks away.
āSure, Cameron.ā He shouts as he heads to the firepit where JJ and Pope are sat.
The villa glows under the bright sun, buzzing with low chatter and the occasional splash from the pool. Y/N leans back into Rafe, comfortably nestled between his legs at the edge, his arms loosely draped around her waist. He's absentmindedly tracing circles on her skin. Topper, Pope, Kiara and Sarah are spread out nearby, drinks in hand, the mood easy and relaxed.
āHey, guys.ā Kelceās voice cuts through the warm air as he approaches. Everyone greets him cheerfully, motioning for him to join. Rafe's hands tighten slightly around Y/N's waist and she glances up at him before her eyes shift to Kelce.
āI...I actually wanted to talk to Y/N.ā Kelce says, looking at her directly. āIf you don't mind.ā
She swallows and looks up at Rafe, who only shrugs. Her gaze returns to Kelce and after a short sigh, she untangles herself from Rafeās arms. She presses a quick kiss to his cheek.
āBe right back.ā She murmurs, before slipping out of the pool. Rafe watches her intently, eyes following the curve of her bikini-clad figure as she walks away with Kelce.
āMan, chill it with the staring.ā Topper jokes.
āShut up.ā Rafe mutters, arms crossing over his chest.
Kelce and Y/N settle near the firepit, facing each other as she pushes her sunglasses up onto her head.
āLook, Iā¦ā Kelce begins, his voice uncertain as he fidgets with the mic cord. āThis isā¦weird.ā Y/N raises a brow, her arms folding as she sits back a little.Ā
āYou're not wrong.ā She mutters and he chuckles nervously.Ā
āOkay, good, so itās not just me. Umā¦I know I was kind of a dick.āĀ
āKind of?ā She lets out a dry laugh. He winces, holding up his hands in surrender.Ā
āFine. I was a dick. A full one. Like, capital D.ā He corrects himself. Y/N tries to hold back a smile, but it tugs at the corner of her mouth.Ā
āBetter.ā She adds. He nods slowly, then exhales, gaze flickering around before settling on her again.Ā
āItās justā¦being here, seeing you again, itās beenā¦a lot. Like, I didnāt expect it to mess with my head this much. But it did.ā He pauses, eyes dropping to the ground.Ā
āOur relationship meant something to me. And just ācause we broke up doesnāt mean I didnāt care. I did. I still do. And it hurt, Y/N. Likeā¦a lot.ā
She opens her mouth to speak, but he cuts in gently.
āLet me finish?ā
She nods, watching him carefully.
āI want you to be happy.ā He says, voice softer now. āWith Rafe or whoever it is. Thatās what matters. And Iām sorry for coming in here and acting like that. I guess I justā¦missed my best friend.ā
Y/N exhales slowly, some of the tension in her shoulders melting.
āKelceā¦it wasnāt easy for me either. Our breakupā¦it really messed with my head. I had to put myself back together after that. Learn how to trust again. Let people in.ā She lets out a quiet laugh, shaking her head as she starts fidgeting with her ring.Ā
āSo yeah, seeing you here? It was a total curveball. I didnāt know how to feel. Still kinda donāt.ā
He smiles faintly, his tone lightening.Ā
āAt least you didnāt throw a drink at me.ā He says. āYet.ā
āItās early.ā She gives him a look. They both laugh and the tension finally starts to lift.
āIām sorry if it sucks seeing me with someone else.ā She says, more gently this time. āBut Rafeā¦heās good to me. He actuallyā¦he cares. A lot.ā
āYou're making me sound really awful right now.ā He groans and Y/N laughs, reaching over to smack his arm.Ā
āYouāre such a baby.ā She exclaims and he grins, rubbing his arm.Ā
āI know. But seriously, Iām happy for you. I really am.ā Then he hesitates, scratching the back of his head. āBut, like...did you have to go with the fake orgasm thing?ā He asks, making Y/N laugh, loud and unapologetic.Ā
āYou were airing out all my embarrassing moments! I had to strike back somehow!āĀ
āAlright, alright. Thatās fair.ā He throws up his hands. āSoā¦we good now? No more public humiliation?ā
āYeah. Iād like that.ā She smiles. Kelce opens his arms slightly, like heās testing the waters. Y/N pauses for a beat, then steps forward and wraps her arms around him. Itās a little stiff at first, but then something softens and they both just stand there, holding on a little longer than expected.
āGod, this is weird.ā Kelce mumbles into her shoulder.
āYouāre ruining the moment.ā She mutters back.
And just like that, they laugh again.
It doesnāt fix everything, but itās something.
Some time later, a loud ping echoes through the villa, causing everyone to turn toward the sound. Kelce, whoās now in the middle of a conversation with Maddy, grabs his phone with a grin.
āI got a text!ā He announces, sitting up straight as the others look his way, with JJ stepping closer to the couch.
āSpit it out, man.ā JJ urges. Kelce glances at the message, his eyes widening before he grins even wider.
āIslanders, tonightās a big night. There will be a recoupling.ā He begins.
āHoly shit!ā Topper exclaims, earning a smack from Rafe.
āKelce, youāll have the chance to couple up with any girl of your choice. So, think carefully. #thechoiceisyours #makeitcount.ā He finishes and a collective gasp rises from the group.Ā
Y/N sits on one of the kitchen stools, with Rafe behind her. Rafe tightens his arm around Y/N and she looks up at him.
āNo need to worry.ā She says quietly. āWeāll be fine.ā
āOh, Iām not worried about him picking you.ā Rafe replies confidently with a smirk. āIām more concerned about what Iām going to say when I choose you.ā
Y/N grins, raising an eyebrow.
āBetter āmake it countā.ā She teases, quoting the text. He leans down to peck her lips.
āI canāt believe Iām gonna have you back in my bed.ā He murmurs, their lips almost touching. She chuckles softly before closing the gap again.
The girls are deep in glam mode. Curling wands heating up, makeup brushes flying, shimmer getting dusted on like fairy dust and absolute chaos over outfit choices.
āI talked to Kelce today.ā Y/N says casually, wrapping a strand of hair around her curling iron.
āEverything cool?ā Maddy asks, rummaging through the cabinet for a missing shoe.
āYeah, yeah. We cleared the air. He said heās happy for me, glad Iām moving on. Said he wants the best for me, that whole thing.ā She shrugs and the girls nod along.
āThatās good.ā Cleo says. āAlways better to keep it civil in here.ā
āOh my god, where is it?ā Maddy groans, making everyone laugh.
āWait, is that the shoe John B wore?ā Sarah squints at the one in Maddyās hand.
āWhy was John B wearing my heels?ā Maddy deadpans and Sarah bursts out laughing.Ā
āHe was trying to act like a girl, said he needed heels and I handed him those. You had to see it. It was iconic.ā
āYou and John B seem pretty close, Sar.ā Kiara chimes in while brushing highlighter onto her cheekbones.Ā
āI second that.ā Cleo adds, smirking.
āWhat? Weāre just friends!ā Sarah says, cheeks flushing pink as she finally finds the missing heel and tosses it to Maddy. āWeāre just having fun.ā
āBabeā¦ā Cleo grins. āGonna channel Ariana real quick, butā¦this is Love Island. No oneās here to ājust have fun.āā The rest of the girls hum in agreement.
āSo howās it going with you and Topper, anyway?ā Kiara asks, spinning around with an arched brow. Sarah flops down in her seat, letting out a sigh.Ā
āI meanā¦I donāt want to sound harsh, but-ā
āThereās nothing there.ā Cleo finishes for her. Everyone giggles. Sarah fidgets.Ā
āItās still early. Heās sweet, heās good-looking, I justā¦ā
āGirl, stop lying to yourself.ā Cleo interrupts. āYou donāt like him. And thatās okay.āĀ
Sarah stares down at her nails. Y/N notices and reaches over, gently taking her hand.
āHey. Itās totally valid to be unsure. You donāt owe anyone an explanation. Weāve got your back, alright?ā Y/N reassures her and Sarah smiles softly.Ā
āThanks.ā She murmurs, grabbing her eyeshadow palette to finish her look.
āAlright, new topic.ā Y/N says, switching the vibe. āWho do you think Kelce is gonna couple up with?ā
āI forgot about that!ā Alyssa gasps.
āHonestly, I think heās got his eye on Miss Maddy over there.ā Kiara teases, pointing with her lip liner.
āAgain, I second that.ā Cleo adds with a smirk. Maddy rolls her eyes.Ā
Maddy drops into her seat, struggling with the heel straps.Ā
āNo comment. And Sarah, your boyfriend stretched these out.ā
āHe is not my boyfriend!ā Sarah calls back.
āNot yet!ā Kiara and Cleo shout in unison, making everyone crack up.
āYou guys are ridiculous.ā Alyssa says, smiling as Cleo reaches over and kisses her cheek, leaving a lipstick mark.
āBut you love us, Aly.ā Cleo grins.
āI do. Unfortunately.ā She says, wiping the mark off with a makeup wipe.
The room settles into a comfortable rhythm as the girls finish getting ready. But just as theyāre about to head downstairs, they notice Y/N pacing, biting her lip and looking around frantically.
āYou okay?ā Sarah asks, slipping in her hoop earrings.
āIā¦yeah. I just-ā Y/N throws open a drawer, rifling through her clothes. āI canāt find my ring.ā
āThe one you always wear?ā Maddy asks, frowning.
āYeah.ā She sighs. āYou guys can go ahead-ā
āUh-uh. Weāre not leaving you.ā Cleo cuts her off, turning back and searching through Y/Nās vanity. The others follow suit, checking drawers, makeup bags, under clothes, even their own stuff just in case.
After a few minutes, they all pause, exchanging defeated looks.
āMaybe it fell outside?ā Alyssa suggests. Everyone nods, trying to stay optimistic.
āHey, weāll find it.ā Maddy says, wrapping an arm around Y/N.
āWas it special?ā Kiara asks gently.
āIt was my grandpaās. He made it for me.ā Y/N swallows hard, glancing down at her bare finger. A pale ring mark lingers where it used to sit.Ā
āIāve never taken it off.ā She blinks and plasters on a smile. āLetās just head downstairs.ā
The girls nod, quiet but supportive, each silently determined to help her find it later.
The sky fades into a dusky violet as night drapes over the villa, a cool hush settling across the space. Laughter hums through the air as the group lounge on the couches, drinks in hand and energy buzzing.
Rafe, JJ, John B, Sarah and Y/N sit together, scattered in relaxed positions, chuckling over something just said.
āSoā¦ā Sarah starts, swirling her drink. āHowās everyone feeling about tonight?ā
The guys offer casual shrugs.
āI think one of us is a little more excited than the rest.ā JJ says, nudging Rafe with a grin. The group laughs. Rafe smirks, a hand resting lightly on Y/Nās thigh.
āWhat can I say?ā He shrugs with mock bravado.
Y/N gives a small, unreadable smile, her eyes scanning the group.Ā
āYou donāt look too thrilled, Y/N/N.ā JJ raises a brow, noticing her expression. All heads turn toward her. She blinks, caught off guard, mouth slightly open.
āNo, no, no, I am! Totally.ā She waves her hand dismissively. āJust tired, thatās all.ā She lets out a well-timed yawn and melts deeper into the cushions.
The group chuckles and the conversation veers back to tonightās drama, Kelce and his looming decision. But Rafeās gaze lingers on Y/N.
āYou sure youāre alright?ā He murmurs, leaning in. She looks up and nods, offering a gentle smile.Ā
āYeah. I swear.ā She replies. He brushes a strand of hair behind her ear, eyes soft.
āIf somethingās on your mindā¦you can tell me. You know that, right?ā
āI know.ā She replies, her smile widening as she reaches for his hand. She starts to fidget with his signet ring, twisting it absently. Rafe glances down at the gesture, about to say something.
āRafe!ā Sarahās voice cuts through the moment, startling them both. He snaps his head up.
āY/N was just telling me about that disaster of a drink you made her the other day.ā Sarah says with a mischievous grin. Rafe groans and laughs.Ā
āYeah, you donāt wanna try that.āĀ
āIt was awful.ā Y/N chimes in, grinning as she looks at Sarah.
āHey.ā Rafe protests. āIt wasnāt that bad.ā
āIt tasted like feet.ā She deadpans. āIām not even exaggerating.ā
āHow do you know what feet taste like?ā JJ squints. John B claps a hand on JJās shoulder.Ā
āJustā¦donāt follow that thought, man.ā
āNow I really wanna try it.ā Sarah leans forward, eyes bright. Y/N widens her eyes.Ā
āWere you dropped as a baby? I just said it tasted like feet!ā She exclaims.
āSo?ā Sarah shrugs, already getting up. āIām curious!ā
She grabs Rafeās arm, tugging him off the couch. āBorrowing him for a sec.ā She announces, dragging him toward the kitchen as Y/N watches them go, still laughing.
āSheās insane.ā Y/N mutters, grabbing her drink off the table as she watches Sarah disappear into the kitchen with Rafe.
āYeah, she is.ā John B replies under his breath. Then he pauses. āI mean, sheās not. Sheās...totally sane. Sheās just-ā
āDude, youāre glitching.ā JJ cuts in, laughing. Y/N smirks and leans in toward the boys.
āYou like her, donāt you?ā She asks, dropping her voice just enough. John B doesnāt answer right away. He glances toward the kitchen where Sarahās laughing with Rafe over some chaotic drink-mixing, then looks back at Y/N.
āWait...did Rafe tell you?ā He asks, suddenly suspicious.Y/Nās eyes go wide.Ā
āYou told Rafe?ā She asks, incredulous.
āShit.ā John B groans, rubbing his face. āI thought he told you or that he would!ā
āOkay, okay, back up.ā She says, holding up a hand. āThatās not even the point right now. The point is: you like Sarah.ā
He takes a slow breath and JJ shakes his head with a grin.
āMan, itās been obvious. Youāve been giving her heart eyes since day one.ā JJ says.
āItās not that simple.ā John B mumbles. āSheās with Topper-ā
āWho she has zero chemistry with.ā JJ interrupts, then looks at Y/N. āWhatās she told you?ā
āI probably shouldnāt say.ā Y/N hesitates, pursing her lips.Ā
āSo she has said something!ā JJ gasps, mock offended. Y/N laughs.Ā
āNot directly. Butā¦she talks about you a lot. Like, a lot. And she blushes constantly when your name comes up. She hasnāt said the words, but I bet she likes you.ā
John B looks back at the kitchen again, clearly overthinking.
āI think you should go for it.ā Y/N adds gently.
āGo for it how? What does that even mean?ā He asks, looking truly stressed.
āWellā¦ā She says with a sly grin āWe are about to have a recouplingā¦ā
āYou think I should pick her?ā He asks, eyes wide.
āI think.ā Y/N says, taking a sip of her drink. āWhen life gives you lemons, you make lemonade.ā
JJ freezes.Ā
āOh my god.ā He says slowly. āI just got that. Like, literally just now. Twenty-five years on this floating rock and it finally makes sense.ā
Y/N and John B burst into laughter.
āThanks, Y/N.ā John B says with a grateful smile.
āAnytime, JB.ā Y/N nods.
In the kitchen, Rafe grabs a glass and starts pulling random ingredients from the cabinets.
āIām warning you now.ā He says with a grin. āThis drink is genuinely terrible.ā
Before he can start pouring, Sarah reaches over and snatches the marshmallows out of his hand.
āYeah, I donāt actually want the drink.ā She says plainly. Rafe pauses, brows furrowing.Ā
āWaitā¦then why are we in here?ā He asks. She glances over her shoulder to Y/N, who is still on the couch with the boys, laughing.
āSomethingās up with Y/N.ā She says softly. Rafe stiffens, the smile slipping from his face.Ā
āWhat happened?ā He asks, voice low, already bracing for the worst.
āNo one hurt her.ā Sarah assures quickly. āShe justā¦lost her ring.ā
āHer ring?ā Rafeās face twists in confusion.Ā
āYeah. It meant a lot to her. Like, emotionally. Sheās trying not to make a big deal, but I can tell itās getting to her.ā
He nods slowly, taking that in.Ā
āRight.ā He mutters, rubbing the back of his neck. āThat explains why she was messing with mine earlier.ā
Sarah points at the ring on his finger.Ā
āExactly. So maybe donāt bring it up. Justā¦let her do her little fidget thing. I think it helps.ā Sarah suggests. Rafe looks down at his hand, twisting the ring instinctively.Ā
āGot it. Thanks for the heads-up.ā
Sarah offers a small, approving nod. Then she glances back at the counter, squinting.
āOkay but seriously.ā She says, wrinkling her nose, āwhat the fuck were you about to make with tequila, hot sauce, and marshmallows?ā
Rafe laughs, grabbing the things to put them back. She grabs a White Claw from the fridge and cracks it open. āCome on, cocktail genius. Letās get back.ā
They walk back toward the group, the sound of laughter echoing.
Soon enough, a loud ping suddenly echoes through the villa, cutting through the chatter. Kiara, lounging with Cleo and Pope, grabs her phone.
āOh, fuck me.ā She mutters, eyes wide. āI got a text!ā She shouts, instantly grabbing everyone's attention.
āCan all Islanders gather around the fire pit? #decisiontime #nogoingbacknow.ā She reads aloud. Climbing out of the beanbag, she helps Cleo up beside her. One by one, the Islanders make their way to the fire pit. The boys take their seats, while the girls line up opposite them, hands linked tightly in anticipation.
Another loud ping breaks the tension, this time from Kelceās phone. He reads the screen.
āKelce, since you are the newest Islander, you get first pick. #alotofhottiesinthevilla.ā He exhales sharply, slipping his phone into his back pocket. Rising from the couch, he adjusts his mic and scans the line of girls.
āIād like to couple up with this girl because, from the moment I walked in, she caught my eye. Sheās stunning and even in just a few conversations, I can tell weāve got a lot in common. She's hilarious too and Iād really like to see where this could go. So, the girl Iād like to couple up with isā¦ā He pauses, letting the silence hang.
āMaddy.ā
Y/N gives Maddyās clammy hand a reassuring squeeze. Maddyās eyes go wide in surprise, flicking briefly to JJ, whoās sitting at the edge of the fire pit with a single eyebrow raised. The girls cheer and urge Maddy forward. She flashes them a nervous smile before stepping toward Kelce.
He holds out his hand and she takes it. They share a quick, tight hug before sitting down side by side.
āThat was nerve-wracking.ā Kelce whispers.
āWait 'til you're on the other side.ā Maddy replies with a soft laugh.
Next up is John B. He adjusts his Hawaiian shirt as he rises, his gaze settling on the fire flickering in front of him.
āIād like to couple up with this girl because...I feel like thereās something there, even if neither of us has really said it out loud yet.ā He begins, voice a little shaky but sure. āSheās beautiful, sheās hilarious and sheās got this bright energy that lights up the villa. Always knows how to make us laugh.ā He pauses, takes a breath. āSo the girl I wanna couple up with is⦠Sarah.ā
Sarahās eyes go wide. Cleo squeals next to her.
āKnew it.ā She whispers under her breath, making the girls around her laugh as Sarah gets to her feet and heads toward John B.
Topperās jaw tightens as he watches them hug, a bitter scoff slipping out before he turns his attention away, eyes scanning the girls instead.
āHeās pissed.ā Sarah murmurs to John B as they sit back down.
āYup.ā He says, still staring into the flames.
Then Pope stands, running a hand through his curls as he steps forward.
āIād like to couple up with this girl because ever since the public paired us together on day one, Iāve had the chance to really get to know her and sheās really amazing. And honestly, sheās justā¦really beautiful. I wanna keep learning more about her, seeing where this goes.ā He doesnāt miss a beat. āSo the girl I wanna couple up with is Kiara.ā
Kiara offers a tight, polite smile as she walks toward him. He leans in and pecks her cheek, but her arms barely wrap around him.
āThanks?ā She whispers awkwardly before sitting beside him on the couch.Ā
Y/N shares a quick glance with Cleo, both of them catching the shift in tension.
Then Rafe stands, smirking as he rises to his full height.
āIād like to couple up with this girl because sheāsā¦amazing.ā His eyes lock on Y/N and her cheeks flush as she grins. āSheās sweet, sheās kind and sheās ridiculously gorgeous, inside and out. And to be honest, Iāve missed her hogging the blanket at night.ā
Laughter breaks out around them, Y/N included.
āSo, the girl I wanna couple up with is Y/N.ā
Without missing a beat, Cleo nudges Y/N forward. She laughs, walking up to Rafe and slipping her hand into his. Her eyes flick up to meet his, then down to his lips and before anyone can blink, he leans in and kisses her softly, drawing her closer. The islanders erupt into cheers and teasing hollers. When they break apart and head to their seats, Y/N leans in.Ā
āHappy now?ā She murmurs. Rafe nods, still grinning.
āVery happy.ā
She chuckles, tucking herself into his side.
Topper stands up slowly, clearing his throat as his gaze settles on the fire.
āI didn't think things would go like this, but, uhā¦ā He trails off for a moment, then continues. āI want to couple up with this girl because sheās really pretty. Weāve had a few good talks and I feel like she actually gets me. Soā¦Iād like to couple up with Alyssa.ā
He reaches out his hand as Alyssa makes her way over. He gives her a quick, gentle kiss on the cheek before they both sit down.
Last but not least, itās JJās turn. He stands with a grin and lets out a small laugh.
āOkay, yeahā¦I didnāt think this would happen either. But I want to couple up with this girl because sheās hilarious and I feel like we have a similar energy.ā
āNo, we donāt.ā Cleo cuts in dryly, sending everyone into laughter. JJ smirks.Ā
āSheās also really pretty. So yeah, Iām coupling up with Cleo.ā
Cleo walks over but swerves dramatically when he leans in for a cheek kiss.
āEw!ā She yells, laughing and the rest of the group cracks up with her.
With the recoupling over, the islanders begin to scatter. Some settling into quiet corners to chat, others cozying up with their new matches. John B pulls Sarah aside to the daybed, both of them sinking into the cushions with a bit of hesitation.
āLook, Iā¦how-how are you feeling?ā He asks, stumbling over his words. Sarah fidgets with a pillow in her lap, her expression unreadable.
āHonestly? Iām okay.ā She says after a pause. āI was actually talking to the girls aboutā¦this. Us. And John B, youāre really sweet. Weāve had some fun moments already. And I think thatās what this whole thingās about. Trying stuff out, seeing what works. So Iām glad you took that risk.ā
John Bās eyes widen, surprised.Ā
āReally? You mean that?ā He asks and she nods, smiling.
āOkay. Thatāsā¦thatās good.ā He lets out a breath, then leans in slightly. āBecause I think I like you, Sarah. And I meant what I said back there. I do wanna see where this goes.ā
She looks up at him, softer now.Ā
āI do too.ā She replies. They share a quiet moment, the kind that doesn't need anything more.
Across the villa, Cleo and Y/N perch on kitchen stools, picking through a bowl of chips. Rafe and Pope lean casually on the other side of the counter, half-listening to their conversation.
āHeās a good guy.ā Cleo says between bites. āIām not saying heās not. I just donāt think we really have anything in common.ā
āYou could give it a shot.ā Y/N suggests, reaching for more chips. āYou never know.ā
Cleo shakes her head, grinning.Ā
āHe reminds me of the kids I work with, I swear. There was this one boy, Tyler. Same blonde hair, blue eyes, same ridiculous jokes. Always confused about what I was saying.ā
āThat sounds exactly like JJ.ā Rafe chimes in, making everyone laugh.
āSeriously.ā Cleo continues. āHe even had the same look on his face when he didnāt understand something.ā
āMaybe give him a chance.ā Pope offers. āAnd if it doesnāt click, someone else will come in and have your head spinning.ā
āYeah⦠true.ā Cleo mutters, her eyes drifting toward Pope as he pours himself a drink. She stares a second too long.
Y/N snaps her fingers in front of Cleoās face.Ā
āYou good?ā She asks. Cleo blinks, startled, then quickly looks down and takes a sip of her drink.
Pope, unaware, clears his throat.Ā
āDid you see how pissed Topper looked?ā
The group shifts with a new wave of laughter and commentary as the night rolls on.
The rest of the night passes easily, with the islanders lounging around outside, talking, laughing, soaking in the last bit of warmth before slowly peeling off to head inside for some much-needed sleep.
Upstairs, the girls settle into their routine, wiping off makeup and changing into soft pajamas.
āOh, hey, Kie?ā Y/N says, glancing over as she dabs her face with a makeup wipe.
āYeah?ā Kiara responds, tugging on a pair of shorts.
āI noticed something earlierā¦when Pope picked you tonight, you kind ofā¦hesitated.ā
That grabs everyoneās attention. They all pause, waiting for her to go on. Cleoās eyes widen.Ā
āTrue! And that hug? That was the most awkward hug Iāve ever seen.ā She exclaims, making the girls laugh, but Kiara just lets out a sigh.
āLook, Popeās a great guy.ā She starts. Cleo snorts.Ā
āYeah, thatās never a good sign.ā
Laughter bubbles up again, softer this time. Kiara shrugs.
āI mean it. Heās smart, sweet, attractiveā¦but I donāt know. Itās like thereās just no real spark. We donāt click. Every time we talk, it either feels forced or uncomfortable. And I donāt like that feeling.ā
The girls nod, taking her in without judgment.
āDo you think you should talk to him? Maybe clear the air?ā Y/N asks gently. Kiara hesitates, then shakes her head.Ā
āNot yet. I just need to figure out how to say itā¦without hurting him.ā
The room quiets for a moment, everyone giving her the space to sit with it. Then, slowly, the night routine picks up again soft conversation, makeup wipes tossed, drawers closing. The kind of silence that comes with knowing not everything needs to be fixed right away.
The girls finally descend downstairs, taking their places on their beds, some familiar, some new.
āWe are putting pillows between us and I don't want to hear a word.ā Cleo announces, already shoving a pillow wall between her and JJ.
āOh come on, Cleo. You donāt wanna cuddle with me?ā JJ grins. Cleo groans while the rest of the room erupts into laughter.
Y/N smiles quietly, making her way over to Rafe in their bed. She sets her water bottle down, then practically launches herself at him, wrapping her arms around his torso. He lets out a surprised yelp before chuckling and hugging her back just as tightly. She rests her chin on his chest, looking up at him.
āHi.ā She whispers.
āHey, pretty girl.ā He replies, brushing a strand of hair out of her face and tucking it behind her ear. His eyes drag over her like he's seeing her for the first time, soaking in the curve of her shoulders, the way her shorts ride up, the warm flush on her cheeks.Ā
āOh, I almost forgot.ā He gently nudges her back and pulls off his hoodie, handing it to her.
āWhat are youā¦Why are you giving me this?ā She asks, eyeing the oversized Ralph Lauren hoodie in confusion.
āI want you to have it. I know you get cold at night.ā
Her features soften, lips curling into a small pout as she leans in and kisses him.
āThank you.ā She murmurs. āYou didnāt have to.ā
āI wanted to.ā He says simply. āAnd uhā¦Sarah told me.ā
Her brows pinch together.
āTold you what?ā
āAbout your ring.ā
Her eyes immediately drop to the chain around his neck, her fingers instinctively reaching out to fidget with it.
āItās whatever.ā She mumbles nonchalantly.
āNo, itās not whatever.ā He says, voice low and steady. āIt means something to you. Iāll help you look for it tomorrow, alright?ā
She shakes her head.
āNo, Rafe. Itās okay.ā
āI'm serious, Y/N. Iām gonna turn this whole damn villa upside down.ā He says, unwavering. āAnd Iām not taking no for an answer.ā
That gets her. She gives him a small, grateful smile.
āThank you.ā
He nods as she pulls the hoodie over her head, adjusting her hair.
āHow does it look?ā
āLike it was made for you.ā He says, eyes locked on her. She rolls her eyes and shoves his shoulder, laughing as she slides off his lap and under the covers. He follows, pulling her in close, her arms naturally curling around him. The lights go out and he presses a kiss to her forehead.
āGood night.ā He whispers.
āGood night, Rafey.ā She teases, but his smile breaks wider than expected.
āDonāt ever stop calling me that.ā He says seriously.
She pauses, caught off guard by how much he means it.
āOkay.ā She replies softly.
He leans down and kisses her slow, but deep, like heās trying to memorize the way she tastes, the way she fits against him. Thereās a pull between them, something warm and steady and when her thigh shifts over his hips, he lets out a quiet groan.
āSorry.ā She whispers, starting to pull back.
āDonāt be.ā He mutters, voice low as his hand slides beneath the hem of his hoodie, smoothing over her waist. āItās okay.ā
She smiles softly, leaning in again. Her nose brushes his and her fingers trail lightly across his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat under her palm.
āI just like being close to you.ā She says, barely above a whisper.
His eyes flick down to her lips, then back up.
āYeah.ā He breathes. āMe too.ā
They kiss again, slower this time and when it ends, she rests her forehead against his, both of them catching their breath in the hush of the room.
Rafe shifts beneath the covers, pulling her in tighter until her body fits snug against his. Their legs tangle, skin brushing skin and everything else fades, like the world outside them has softened.
She leans in again, lips finding his and after another long kiss, he gently presses her thigh a little lower. The motion earns another groan from him and he shifts slightly, adjusting himself with an embarrassed wince.
āSorryā¦for that.ā He mutters. Y/N giggles into his chest, her voice low and teasing.
āItās okay.ā She whispers with a smirk. āItās kinda cute that youāre already, well, you know.ā
He groans louder this time, burying his face in her neck, completely undone.
With his arms wrapped around her and her head tucked just below his chin, the chaos of the villa fades into the background.
Started writing chap 2 for forever and always and i seriously feel so bad when Iām making others wait but give me a little bit more time guys my sem is about to over soon and i can finally write in peacešš»š
Itās pouring and i find myself at her door just like all those times before, Iām not sure how i got there itās like all roads they lead me here.
My y/n, is getting married in two weeks- how did we get here? How can i just let her go?
Sure, we foughtāa lot. But we always found our way back to each other, didnāt we? It wasnāt healthy and itās not normal for couples to break up a thousand time and get back together again, I know that. But maybe nothing about us was ever normal. And that never changed the fact that I truly love her.
A warm light spills from her bedroom window, casting a glow onto the wet pavement. I figured sheās home.
I ring the bell before I can talk myself out of it, my heart pounding louder than the rain.
A few beats later, the door swings open. And there she is.
"Rafe?" Her voice is laced with exhaustion, eyes widening in disbelief. āWhy are you here?ā
āI donāt know whatās gotten into me..all i know is i just walked here all the way from my house.ā I swallow hard, searching for the right words. "I need to talk to you, okay?"
She exhales sharply, shaking her head. āRafe,how much more is there to say? Iām so tired of this. Weāre done. Weāve been done. Iām literally getting married in two weeks.ā
āI know,ā I say quickly. āThatās why Iām here. Just please, hear me out.ā
āNo.ā She steps back, her voice firm. āIām not playing this game anymore. Just go home.ā
Sheās about to shut the door but I stopped her, āplease y/n, this is the last time okay I promise,ā I plead, my voice laced with desperation. āIām not here to fight or ask you take me back. This time i really want to apologize for my wrongdoings and clear everything up, okay?ā
She shakes her head, āi think Iāve heard enough apologies over the past years from you, Rafe. Iām not interested in hearing another one,ā she says with cold detachment.
āGo back home,ā she orders before shutting the door.
I take a deep breath, closing my eyes as the rain continues to drench me.
"I'm not leaving," I say, loud enough for her to hear through the door. "Not until you hear me out. I donāt care if I freeze out here. Iām not leaving."
Silence. Then, footsteps retreating.
She doesnāt care.
But I do.
I know Iāll regret this if I donāt say what I need to sayāif I donāt try one last time before she gets married and I lose her forever.
Y/nās Pov:
He finds himself at my door just like all those times before. He wears his best apology but I was there to watch him leave.
And all the times i let him in, just for him to go again, disappear when he comes back.
This time Iām done.
I wonāt buy any of his words anymore but standing right before his eyes after no contact for almost two years, I canāt help it. My heart is aching.
After I shut the door behinds me, I try to ignore it. I go back to my room, force myself to stay still. But the longer I sit there, the harder it becomes to ignore the sound of the rain hammering down outside.
Heās still there.
Minutes pass. Maybe more.
And then, against my better judgment, I get up.
I open the door.
Heās shivering, drenched, his lips slightly blue. He looks up at me with those stupidly familiar eyes, and something inside me cracks.
I sigh, stepping aside. āCome in before you get sick.ā This is the last time Iāll let him in my door.
But before I can pull him in, he grabs my hand, his grip firm yet gentle. "Come with me."
He pulls me into the rain āWhat?ā I frown.
āRafe, I just showeredāā
āDance with me.ā
I blink at him. āAre you insane?ā
āI promise y/n, this is the last thing Iāll ever ask from you,ā he says, his voice quieter now, raw and honest. "Just dance with me."
And maybe itās the rain, or maybe itās the way his hands settle around my waist like they belong there, but I let him pull me into a slow danceāright there, in the middle of the downpour.
If anyone would sees us right now, theyād think weāre crazy. Maybe we are.
I know this is wrong.
But in that moment, nothing else exists.
No past. No future. No reasons why. Just us.
The rain begins to slow, turning into a gentle drizzle. And then, in a barely audible whisper, he says, "I probably wonāt be there to ask you for a dance at your wedding⦠so please, let me have this one now."
My breath hitches.
Tears well in my eyes becauseāGodāit hits me. Weāve known each other for so long. Back when we were still friends weāve talked how we gonna be there at each otherās wedding and how I hoped that Iāll marry him when we were together. He will always be my first love.
Now, Iām not marrying him and how I wish he wouldnāt be at the wedding cause I donāt think I could handle seeing his face there.
"Rafeā¦" My voice trembles.
He pulls me closer, resting his forehead against mine, his hands shaking. "Iām too much of a coward to look you in the eyes, so just listen, okay?"
I nod, my heart in my throat.
"I'm sorry for everything," he murmurs. "Weāve known each other for so long. We were best friends before we ever dated, and maybe thatās why I couldnāt accept that we were better off that way. Maybe thatās why I kept holding on, even when I knew we were breaking each other. But I want you to know that Iām happy for you. I really am. You deserve a love that doesnāt hurt. A love thatās easy. And IāI hope he gives you that."
Tears slip down my cheeks.
"This is the last time I'll ever come here. The last time for everything," he continues. "Please be happy. And please⦠please know that I truly love you. Even if weāre just meant to be friends in the end."
I lift my head, finally meeting his gaze.
I donāt know what to say.
Because maybe⦠maybe a part of me still loves him, too.
But I also know this is for the best.
"You will always be my first love, Rafe," I whisper.
A small, broken smile tugs at his lips. He cups my face, pressing his forehead against mine.
And for a moment, I let myself wonder.
If things had been different.
If we had been different.
If it were this lips in front of me that Iād be kissing when I say āI doā in two weeks.
Then, softlyāso softlyāhe presses a lingering kiss to my forehead.
"I'm sorry," he whispers.
And then, he lets go.
He takes a step back.
And just like thatā
With my whole body drenched, tears falling, i watch him walk away.
āThis is the last time.ā
A/N: FINALLY no more draft angstš„³ also Iāve always wanted to slow dance in the middle of the rain to The Last Time hence, the storyš and eid mubarak to those celebrating!
Itās pouring and i find myself at her door just like all those times before, Iām not sure how i got there itās like all roads they lead me here.
My y/n, is getting married in two weeks- how did we get here? How can i just let her go?
Sure, we foughtāa lot. But we always found our way back to each other, didnāt we? It wasnāt healthy and itās not normal for couples to break up a thousand time and get back together again, I know that. But maybe nothing about us was ever normal. And that never changed the fact that I truly love her.
A warm light spills from her bedroom window, casting a glow onto the wet pavement. I figured sheās home.
I ring the bell before I can talk myself out of it, my heart pounding louder than the rain.
A few beats later, the door swings open. And there she is.
"Rafe?" Her voice is laced with exhaustion, eyes widening in disbelief. āWhy are you here?ā
āI donāt know whatās gotten into me..all i know is i just walked here all the way from my house.ā I swallow hard, searching for the right words. "I need to talk to you, okay?"
She exhales sharply, shaking her head. āRafe,how much more is there to say? Iām so tired of this. Weāre done. Weāve been done. Iām literally getting married in two weeks.ā
āI know,ā I say quickly. āThatās why Iām here. Just please, hear me out.ā
āNo.ā She steps back, her voice firm. āIām not playing this game anymore. Just go home.ā
Sheās about to shut the door but I stopped her, āplease y/n, this is the last time okay I promise,ā I plead, my voice laced with desperation. āIām not here to fight or ask you take me back. This time i really want to apologize for my wrongdoings and clear everything up, okay?ā
She shakes her head, āi think Iāve heard enough apologies over the past years from you, Rafe. Iām not interested in hearing another one,ā she says with cold detachment.
āGo back home,ā she orders before shutting the door.
I take a deep breath, closing my eyes as the rain continues to drench me.
"I'm not leaving," I say, loud enough for her to hear through the door. "Not until you hear me out. I donāt care if I freeze out here. Iām not leaving."
Silence. Then, footsteps retreating.
She doesnāt care.
But I do.
I know Iāll regret this if I donāt say what I need to sayāif I donāt try one last time before she gets married and I lose her forever.
Y/nās Pov:
He finds himself at my door just like all those times before. He wears his best apology but I was there to watch him leave.
And all the times i let him in, just for him to go again, disappear when he comes back.
This time Iām done.
I wonāt buy any of his words anymore but standing right before his eyes after no contact for almost two years, I canāt help it. My heart is aching.
After I shut the door behinds me, I try to ignore it. I go back to my room, force myself to stay still. But the longer I sit there, the harder it becomes to ignore the sound of the rain hammering down outside.
Heās still there.
Minutes pass. Maybe more.
And then, against my better judgment, I get up.
I open the door.
Heās shivering, drenched, his lips slightly blue. He looks up at me with those stupidly familiar eyes, and something inside me cracks.
I sigh, stepping aside. āCome in before you get sick.ā This is the last time Iāll let him in my door.
But before I can pull him in, he grabs my hand, his grip firm yet gentle. "Come with me."
He pulls me into the rain āWhat?ā I frown.
āRafe, I just showeredāā
āDance with me.ā
I blink at him. āAre you insane?ā
āI promise y/n, this is the last thing Iāll ever ask from you,ā he says, his voice quieter now, raw and honest. "Just dance with me."
And maybe itās the rain, or maybe itās the way his hands settle around my waist like they belong there, but I let him pull me into a slow danceāright there, in the middle of the downpour.
If anyone would sees us right now, theyād think weāre crazy. Maybe we are.
I know this is wrong.
But in that moment, nothing else exists.
No past. No future. No reasons why. Just us.
The rain begins to slow, turning into a gentle drizzle. And then, in a barely audible whisper, he says, "I probably wonāt be there to ask you for a dance at your wedding⦠so please, let me have this one now."
My breath hitches.
Tears well in my eyes becauseāGodāit hits me. Weāve known each other for so long. Back when we were still friends weāve talked how we gonna be there at each otherās wedding and how I hoped that Iāll marry him when we were together. He will always be my first love.
Now, Iām not marrying him and how I wish he wouldnāt be at the wedding cause I donāt think I could handle seeing his face there.
"Rafeā¦" My voice trembles.
He pulls me closer, resting his forehead against mine, his hands shaking. "Iām too much of a coward to look you in the eyes, so just listen, okay?"
I nod, my heart in my throat.
"I'm sorry for everything," he murmurs. "Weāve known each other for so long. We were best friends before we ever dated, and maybe thatās why I couldnāt accept that we were better off that way. Maybe thatās why I kept holding on, even when I knew we were breaking each other. But I want you to know that Iām happy for you. I really am. You deserve a love that doesnāt hurt. A love thatās easy. And IāI hope he gives you that."
Tears slip down my cheeks.
"This is the last time I'll ever come here. The last time for everything," he continues. "Please be happy. And please⦠please know that I truly love you. Even if weāre just meant to be friends in the end."
I lift my head, finally meeting his gaze.
I donāt know what to say.
Because maybe⦠maybe a part of me still loves him, too.
But I also know this is for the best.
"You will always be my first love, Rafe," I whisper.
A small, broken smile tugs at his lips. He cups my face, pressing his forehead against mine.
And for a moment, I let myself wonder.
If things had been different.
If we had been different.
If it were this lips in front of me that Iād be kissing when I say āI doā in two weeks.
Then, softlyāso softlyāhe presses a lingering kiss to my forehead.
"I'm sorry," he whispers.
And then, he lets go.
He takes a step back.
And just like thatā
With my whole body drenched, tears falling, i watch him walk away.
āThis is the last time.ā
A/N: FINALLY no more draft angstš„³ also Iāve always wanted to slow dance in the middle of the rain to The Last Time hence, the storyš and eid mubarak to those celebrating!