Kazia

37. Four orange cats in a trenchcoat. I write stuff. They/Them

[steadfastmockingbird]

Successful day out at Bristol Pride, minus some ridiculousness with ALL the trains through Warminster being cancelled on our way home. I hugged a lot of people. Once again it was mostly kids. People young enough to be my biological children. Last year I naively assumed it would be people my age and up needing comfort; folks with more conservative upbringings, more old-fashioned parents.

I told each and every one of them that I was glad to see them, that they're worthy of love, and to drink plenty of water, wear sunscreen, and stay in the shade. I think they needed to hear it. I promised several of them that it gets better, and told at least two that they didn't deserve to suffer.

I was far from the only person doing this. It's encouraging that more people are recognizing the need. Infuriating and enraging that there's a need at all.

Love your kids, including the queer ones. Be prepared to grow and change and encounter unknowns, because that's part of being a fucking parent.

[kropotkindersurprise]

February 9, 2000 - The London Lesbian Avengers stopped the no. 15 bus in London's Piccadilly Circus, and painted it pink. This was done to demand the repeal of homophobic Section 28, and to protest the involvement of homophobic millionaire Brian Souter in a Scottish campaign against the repeal. Souter was also the owner of privatised bus company Stagecoach, operating route 15. Section 28 was finally repealed in England and Wales in 2003. [video]

[steadfastmockingbird]

I survived section 28. Finished secondary school at 16 in 2004. I don't think a lot of people realize just how broad the legislation went and just how harrowing it was for those of us under it.

I got outed at school by someone I thought was a friend, but was actually just mining the local freak for content. I thought we were besties, because autism is like that, so I told her that I thought I might be a lesbian. She told everyone. That was spring of 2001. The next few years were hell.

Section 28 was the justification for the teachers not helping or offering advice beyond 'well if you will make a spectacle of yourself'. It was the justification for not defending me when I was beaten. When I had bleached poured over me. When my hair was set on fire. When my books were all tipped out into the showers and soaked. When the girls formed a barricade and refused to let me into any of the bathrooms because I was a 'pervert' (sound familiar, anyone?). Throughout all of it, I got told there was nothing that could be done.

See, to defend me could be construed as 'putting homosexuality in a positive light'. If they said 'there's nothing wrong with her' a parent or another teacher could complain they were 'promoting homosexuality', and that teacher's job would be on the line. The guidance was deliberately worded so that often teachers didn't know what they could do and where the lines could be drawn, so they chose to do nothing to save their own skins. They'd all heard about what happened to teachers who stepped out of line.

Some of them helped where they felt they could. Putting me in silent detention for my own safety. Skipping their own lunch breaks to sit in an empty classroom with me. One slipped me a book of queer poetry from his own collection. A few months later the same one gave me a flyer for a Pride youth group, which provided some limited respite when I could get there. He could have lost his career, for giving me that book and that flyer. Thankfully my parents were too oblivious to notice.

The thing is, when it was repealed, there wasn't clear guidance immediately to replace it; what was okay to say, what wasn't, what would get someone in trouble, what was now safe. 'Promotion' of homosexuality was no longer illegal, but where did that boundary fall? The same teachers continued to help me. The same mob hounded me every second they got for my final year of mandatory education. Most of the same teachers that weren't helping before still weren't sure how they could help then.

The irony is that now, the teachers that helped me and the social workers who ran the Pride youth group would probably be labeled 'groomers', because it's happening again.

Before too much longer I'm worried we'll end up with another section 28. Another generation of young people desperate, frightened, unprotected by the adults around them and ultimately attempting suicide like I did. Some already are, and some are succeeding.

[catchymemes]

[whatcha-thinkin]

The bar is closing and you and your drunk friends are hungry! In your opinion what's the best drunk food?

tacos

pancakes

hot dogs

chicken wings

burgers

pizza

nachos

Philly cheesesteak

ramen

peanut butter & jelly

dude see if there's a [tag] nearby

I would never bring this garbage into the temple that is my body

Voting ended onJun 18

[penandinkprincess]

truly few things instantly put me in a bad mood more than humidity

WHY is the fucking AIR out here TOUCHING ME

get OFF

[antifainternational]

June 12 / 13, Bristol, UK

[burninglights]

fucking insane to be a person of colour in the uk right now

[burninglights]

When my family first moved to the UK, we faced a similar risk to our wellbeing & safety as many are facing now, albeit for different reasons. in light of everything happening in Ireland & the tensions increasing in Glasgow, and the perennial England, here’s a list of actionable things to do for people who may be targeted & anti racist allies.

MY HOME IS ON THE LIST/LIKELY TO BE TARGETED, WHAT CAN I DO?

* it may bring you peace of mind to have a go-bag ready, just in case. A go-bag is a bag with everything in it that you need to get out a volatile situation quickly. Any bag that can be secured (buttoned or zipped) will do. In your go-bag, you should include;

- identifying documents; passport/driver’s license/asylum card/ILR certificate/British Residency permit card

- Wallet and/or banking books

- A spare charger & cable and/or a power bank

- any shelf-stable medication (tablets, inhalers etc.) if you are on medication that needs to be refrigerated, leave it in the fridge until you have to leave

- Sanitary items; toothbrush, toothpaste, sanitary pads & tampons, deodorant. If you have very young children with you, you may also want to take your nappy bag.

* If you have to leave, a go-bag is a convenient way to ensure you have everything of importance with you.

* If you are being supported by an asylum seekers or refugee charity, or are a member of a gurdwara/temple, mosque, synagogue or church, reach out to your religious leaders. They may be able to provide direct support, or put you in contact with organisations or other congregants who can help. If you are friendly with your neighbours, it may be worth contacting them too.

* IN THE EVENT THAT “PROTESTORS” DO COME TO YOUR HOUSE, CALL 999 IMMEDIATELY, AND FOLLOW ANY INSTRUCTIONS THEY GIVE YOU. MOVE AWAY FROM ANY WINDOWS. DO NOT OPEN YOUR DOOR UNLESS INSTRUCTED TO DO SO BY EMERGENCY SERVICES.

I’M AN INTERNATIONAL STUDENT/CARE WORKER/NHS WORKER, WHAT SHOULD I DO?

* Contact your student welfare office/NHS Trust/agency for advice, support and referral to organisations that may be able to provide assistance

* if you live in or commute through an area that is likely to be targeted, contact your lecturers and your faculty to find out whether remote study is possible; if you work in care or as part of the NHS, find out if it is possible to change shifts.

* If it would provide peace of mind, prepare a go-bag as listed above

* Reach out to your the uni society or student’s organisation for international students or students of specific ethnic origin; they may be able to provide you with direction to resources and peer support. If your university has a Marxist or Socialist society, reach out to them for mutual aid with a travel buddy etc., for getting to and from your place of study/work

* If you are a member of a gurdwara/temple, mosque, synagogue or church, reach out to your religious leaders. They may be able to provide direct support, or put you in contact with organisations or other congregants who can help.

* If you are friendly with your neighbours, it may be worth contacting them too for assistance with travel to & from work.

* Report any racism or racialised violence you are subjected to. NHS staff have a right to refuse to treat patients who harass, abuse, threaten or insult them; if a patient is racist to you, where possible, ask another member of staff to take over their care.

PERSONAL SAFETY:

* do not leave your home unless strictly necessary. If it is necessary to leave, don’t do it alone.

* use NextDoor, WhatsApp, social media and word of mouth to avoid commuting through “protestor” road blocks, areas of active conflict etc.,

* When travelling, use Share My Location or Life360, and keep at least two people aware of your expected time of arrival at your destination with instructions to contact the police if you do not let them know you’ve made it safely

* do not directly confront any individuals involved, or allow them to bait you into becoming confrontational

* only record if it is safe. Do not record individuals directly/from up close

* Do not directly intervene. If you see violence occurring, contact emergency services and if safe to do so, record what’s happening.

ALLYSHIP & HOW TO HELP:

* if you have neighbours, friends, coworkers or acquaintances form targeted communities, reach out to them. Ask them what you can do to help them feel safe.

* If you live in an area likely to be targeted, reach out to any vulnerable people you know. If safe and possible, offer to let them shelter with you in the event they need to leave home

* If you see any incitement to violence online screenshot it; it may prove useful in the event of individual “protesters” being prosecuted

* If you see any specific areas being discussed as targets, alert anyone you know at risk in the area

* Reach out to local refugee & asylum seekers’ organisations, to organisations supporting foreign national care & healthcare workers, and to churches, mosques, gurdwaras; they may be looking for short term assistance in helping to provide for vulnerable members of their community

CHARITABLE ORGANISATIONS FOR ASSISTANCE & TO SUPPORT:

* NASC Ireland; refugee & asylum seeker charity

* Doras.org; migrant, stateless persons, refugee and asylum seeker rights advocates

* Jesuit Refugee Service; religious refugee & asylum seekers charity

* Irish Refugee Council; supporting stateless displaced persons & refugees in NI & ROI

* International Student’s House (IE & UK WIDE): provides hardship funding and help to international students

* PathFinder (UK WIDE); supports international students

* Care International (GLOBAL); global carer’s charity

* Choose Love (IE & UK WIDE); charitable organisation supporting refugees and asylum seekers

* Praxis UK (UK WIDE); supporting refugees & asylum seekers

* The Runnymede Trust (IE & UK WIDE); antiracism education charity

* Migrant’s Rights Network (IE & UK WIDE); advocacy and support for migrants and refugees

* ShareTheMeal (GLOBAL); providing meals for refugees and those fleeing conflict globally

* Amnesty (IRELAND, UK & WORLDWIDE); human rights NGO

* UNHCR & UN Refugee Council (GLOBAL); UN refugee bodies supporting those seeking asylum, fleeing conflict & internally/internationally displaced worldwide

[steadfastmockingbird]

Someone complimented my shoelaces today.

I used The Line.

And the shock of them realising we were all at the Devil's Sacrament was profound.

And delightful

[ellewantsrevenge]

aadam jacobs's archive

[misfitwashere]

I wrote a eulogy

"I wrote a eulogy for my best friend last week. Then I read it to him. At the pub. On a Tuesday."

He was alive, holding a pint, looking at me like I'd lost my mind. Maybe I have.

I'm Mick. I'm 70. The man across the table was Barry. Seventy-two. Best mate for 46 years. Met on a building site in 1979. He dropped a plank on my foot. I called him something unrepeatable. He bought me a pint after the shift. Haven't gone a week without talking since.

Three months ago we went to a funeral. Bloke we'd worked with. Cancer. The eulogies were beautiful - people saying what he meant to them, things they'd clearly never said to his face. And all I could think was, he can't hear any of this.

Every beautiful sentence. Every "he changed my life." Said to a room of crying people and a box of wood.

I turned to Barry. Whispered, "What a waste."

Drove home. Couldn't sleep. Because I realised, if Barry died tomorrow, I'd stand up and say extraordinary things about this man. Things I've never said in 46 years. And he'd be in the box, missing all of it.

So I wrote them down. Took a week. Harder than expected - not finding the words, but admitting I had them.

Rang him. "Tuesday. The Crown. Need to read you something."

"Have you joined a book club?"

"Just come."

Same corner table. Pint of bitter. Crisps. I pulled out the paper. He saw my hands shake.

"Mick. What's this?"

"Your eulogy. I'm reading it now because I'm not wasting it on a day you can't hear it."

"Have you gone mad?"

"Probably. Shut up and listen."

I read it. In a pub. To a man very much alive and very much uncomfortable.

I told him about the plank and how it was the best injury of my life. About the night he drove forty minutes in rain to help change a tyre. About how he rang every day for three months after my divorce and never once asked "Are you alright?" - just talked about football and weather, because he knew I didn't need a question. I needed a voice.

I told him he was the funniest man I'd ever known and his jokes were terrible and both things were true. That he'd been a better father than he thinks. That his wife's a saint and he knows it. That I'd have been a worse man without him.

He didn't look at me. Stared at his pint. Jaw tight. Doing that thing men do when the feelings arrive and they'd rather swallow glass than show it.

When I finished, long silence. Then he picked up his pint, took a sip, and said,

"You're paying for the next round. And the one after."

That was his answer. Perfect. Because Barry doesn't say "I love you too." He says "you're buying."

But in the car park, he hugged me. Not the quick back-pat. A real one. Thirty seconds. Neither let go first.

And he said quietly into my shoulder, "Don't read that again at the real one. I want new material."

Who would you write a eulogy for - while they're still here?

Don't wait. The flowers can't hear. The box doesn't laugh. Say it now. At the pub. Over a bad cup of tea. You'll feel ridiculous.

They'll look uncomfortable. It'll be the most important thing you've ever done.

Read them the speech while they can still hug you in the car park.”

.

[perception-filter]

staring at the dessert menu and twirling my hair and going "should I be baaaaddd" until the autistic girl I'm eating with says "there is nothing bad about eating dessert. it is a morally neutral action"

[pangur-and-grim]

does anyone else have knees that stop working? like you balance your weight wrong, and it's like well, now I don't have a knee for the next three days

[mangled-by-disuse]

in happier pride news i actually found this deeply heartwarming

that's solidarity baybeeee

[lgbtlaughs]

Further context: Durham city council (Reform UK) cut funding and support for Pride. The Durham Miner's Association and other trade unions raised enough money for Durham Pride 2026 to go ahead - a direct call back to when Lesbian and Gays Support the Miners (LGSM) raised money for mining communities when Margaret Thatcher seized union funding during the miner strikes of 1984-85.

At the 1985 Labour party meet, the motion to support LGBT rights as a party was passed due to a block vote from mining unions.

Stephen Guy, the chair of the Durham Miners’ Association, said that when it became apparent Durham Pride was under threat, he took it upon himself to “encourage the trade union movement to step up and do the right thing, and stand shoulder to shoulder with the LGBT+ community […] They not only raised funds for us, but came to our communities, uplifted our spirits when they were down, and showed their solidarity.”

[anistarrose]

if you are a parent, or may become one, or you are otherwise likely to arrive in the situation of caring for a child while they eat, promise me this: if a child doesn't like a certain food or food group, you will ask them WHY. and specifically, you will pay attention to either confirming or ruling out "it makes my mouth itch" or "it makes my stomach hurt," both of which are medically important info that children may not provide unprompted. which i know because this PSA has been brought to you by "i spent my entire childhood and much of my early teens eating peas and lentils while wondering why everyone else liked the Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation so much, like were they a bunch of legume masochists or something, before i finally realized that Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation was in fact a sinister demon appearing only to me, and her true demonic name was: Legume Allergy"

[twostepsfromtemerant]

For all the many flaws of the tagging system on this hellsite, it is so perfect for Sending Home. A man's not dead while his name is still spoken, and what are the tags but the Overhead of tumblr? They aren't the posts themselves, but they are metacommentary on posts, notes to friends, info to be passed on. The message has been logged and is continuing to be sent on. GNU

[pangur-and-grim]

so I'm playing Planetscape Torment, and I do like it, but can anyone tell me if you get to have gross surgery done on you at any point.....?

[organicmatter]

Being hairy is so awesome #mammal