Yes, My Real Name Is Dirk

44. Heteroromantic Asexual. Agender. Minnesotan. My brain is broken. I like to make stuff.

[talesfromtreatment]

The owner gave me permission to share photos... but look! Look at this little French Bulldog!

A nose! Minimal facial wrinkles! Breathes quietly! *delighted gasp*

[talesfromtreatment]

She's all grown up and going to be spayed soon

Still has fantastic knees and ankles and nose and a face and breathes silently and her legs are under her body and I bet that, because she's about to be spayed due to her heart murmur, she has no hemivertebrae just to continue to make her otherwise the most physically sound frenchie I've ever seen. And her owner isn't letting her get fat.

And I give no fucks that she isn't a breed standard color. And don't come at me with "waaah, well bred frenchies harglebargle!!!" Those don't exist here, okay? They barely exist *anywhere*. 99.999999999999999% of frenchies are not show line dogs. At this point I'm more like to encounter an honest to the gods unicorn than this mythical well bred frenchie in person

[surrealtiktoks]

[embroideredcupcake]

I'd say this is an anomaly but seriously roos are sometimes nosy and just need to be in your business, OR they will fight you if you look at them funny. I love them, they're great, but they make little sense.

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

The fucking horror I felt in my soul of the 3 seconds it took to try to and work out what the fuck this animal was

[inthefallofasparrow]

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[lostsometime]

ok sorry to double reblog BUT I just looked him up and he does these fantastic videos where he breaks down HOW he actually mimics the other artists’ styles. Like for ed Sheeran, he explains how he brings his voice forward in the mouth, while Adam Levine sings in the back of the mouth, stuff like that. It’s SO COOL, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone actually break down how to do this sort of thing, as a skill, instead of just treating it like a neat trick they just happen to be good at. https://www.tiktok.com/@justinjmooremusic

Check him out he’s so cool

[animalssittingoncapybaras]

Otter sits on a capybara

[bat-itude-deactivated20211106]

Please watch this Loony-Tunes-ass chase into Tarantulas' lair from "The Low Road"

[shoogachi]

🎭 HEXADECIMAL 🎭

[iconuk01]

Just to note that Hexadecimal's introductory episode: The Medusa Bug, has been cleaned up, and is now available in HD format remastered from it's original master tapes by the fine folk at the ReBoot ReWind project, and it looks AWESOME!

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

AHHHHHHHH AWESOME :D

[shadow-banned-the-hedgehog]

[stars-bean]

☀ The Addams Family ☀ | 2.17 - "Morticia and Gomez vs. Fester and Grandmama"

[bignaz8]

Bumblebutt

[stellarvisionary]

Working on turning my generic angel wings that I bought last year into reaper wings, to further the visual distinction of my Hanekoma cosplay. Maybe this year no one will call me Crowley 🤣

[stellarvisionary]

Oop, my gummy just kicked in, and now I'm having a dissociative episode. My arms feel like they're 3 miles long, or like my eyes are cameras and I'm watching myself do stuff 🙃

[asteroidtroglodyte]

“Ugh can’t stand babies they cry so much!”

That tiny Human spirit has shat himself 4 times today if you’d shat yourself 4 times by noon you’d be in hysterics too

[asteroidtroglodyte]

He fell asleep in his bed, at home, and woke up at the goddamn grocery store with an overhead light in his face if that happened to you you’d become The Joker

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Poor guy’s only been here for like a dozen weeks he doesn’t even have a favorite show to distract him yet he’s just raw-dogging reality unfiltered with no goddamn Blorbos to rotate whatsoever

[scary-ivy]

Baby's first rotating blorbos

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Y’all are great I love y’all

[tineid]

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Everyone say “thank you crying baby”

[venndaai]

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.

[venndaai]

they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you

[fluorescentbrains]

this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard

just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !

[muffinlance]

Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!

Eye-opening research: Greenland sharks maintain vision for centuries through DNA repair mechanism

Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir

I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks

[skittypilled]

so i put my hands up theyre playing my song the evil skull flies away

[stellarvisionary]

[spaghettihell]

Reblog to hug prev

Please

[beardedmrbean]

perfection

[florianflux]

sniles so sneetly at you

[my-dailydreams]