Hello There!

[not100bees]

I just saw the world's freshest baby in Panera bread. Like that thing was JUST out of the oven. I've heard of being wet behind the ears but this baby was wet behind the everything. It was still damp.

[sturgeon-system]

[teaspoon-of-stars]

Theres the lil thang

[cupcraft]

You never know what color pallette someone's Tumblr is till ppl are screenshotting posts and tags

[aropride]

do u like mine

[cupcraft]

Oh wow.

[cupcraft]

Some people on tumblr are reading ancient scrolls and you'd never know

[cucurb]

hey guysss so unfortunately the rumors are true and im leaving the narrative. Buttt the good news is my absence will create such a gaping hole in your lives that it will become a sort of presence itself, and so in a way it will kind of be like i never left! But i am. Leaving just to be clear.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Me telling my parents that I was moving out to go to university against their will

[kuromi-hoemie]

hey um. so sorry to tell you this, but op of that post plays toys kinda weird. yeah you should just block them, that's not how normal people play with toys

[kuromi-hoemie]

this is what shipping discourse sounds like to me

[woodwool]

severely deficient in whatever vitamin makes u a person

[star-h0pper]

it's really really funny to me that eva stratt's list of crimes canonically includes piracy. do movie only fans know they tried to take her to court for pirating everything ever published and she ron swanson'd her way out of it. i need you all to know this.

[importantcatpics]

[thatdiabolicalfeminist]

Most of the time, most people will believe at least most of what you say when you tell them about yourself.

This is important to keep in mind if you have a tendency to reflexively put yourself down to others.

If they begin to agree, it may be less a matter of them hating you for some inherent stain on your character that somehow everyone else can see, and more a matter of them simply believing what you told them about yourself.

Refraining from shrinking around others is a skill that takes time and motivation to learn, but it is possible to learn it, and it is an incredibly important survival tool, as well as something that can improve how it feels for you to be in relationship with other people.

Posting this as a reminder to myself, as much as anything tbth!!

[mysterycat-official]

I lowkey hate when programs talk to me in a friendly way. "don't worry, nearly there!" Shut up. It should say "loading 64.3% completed. Do not turn off device" and absolutely nothing else. You arent my friend you are computer. Act like it

[almondcroissantsandink]

Ryland Grace, seconds before losing consciousness: did--did you just reference Parks and Rec

[digitalhitchhiker]

[crimson-chains]

A true story of something that happened to me at a con a few years ago! I just couldn't believe that bag saldjaldjalkd!!!

[lesbianshepard]

one of the funnier incidents of me assuming someone knew a meme irl was when a new coworker was talking about some woman who got arrested for tax fraud and I went "God forbid women do anything" and he got scared and thought I was accusing him of being sexist, so he started apologizing and saying how tax fraud isn't even bad, actually.

[gay--dog]

man half of my mutuals are named some shit like Snooble at this point im doing some poob as bullshit in my life

[discount--dracula]

wbat the hell you weren't even exaggerating

[memeuplift]

[teaboot]

Nah man that's a northern bobwhite

[robinparravel]

I love Bruce

[molabuddy]

[kat]

i had a dream last night that the entire world used a currency (?) called angrypennies which as the name implies are obtained by experiencing anger. the stronger and more intense your anger was, the more angrypennies you'd gain. an all-consuming rage would earn you more than a slight irritation, etc. so people were always searching for ways to fuel their anger and purposefully keeping themselves angry all the time because they wanted to earn angrypennies. unclear if angrypennies could be exchanged for goods and services, or if they were just a collectible.

anyway, as if this wasn't heavy-handed enough, at one point british comedian greg davies appeared and explained that angrypennies couldn't be worth feeling angry all the time. this was a real revelation to dream-me and i was finally able to break free of the angrypenny grind and allow myself to experience emotions other than anger.

[kat]

it goes without saying that i will be using the word angrypenny as if it was part of the common vernacular instead of a term that my dreaming brain conjured up i.e. "he's all about the angrypennies" (derogatory way to refer to a guy who searches for reasons to be angry and possibly lacks introspection)

[randomitemdrop]

Item: Angrypennies