The Hundred Years’ War on Palestine: A History of Settler Colonialism and Resistance, 1917-2017 (book)
The Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine (book)
Nakba Day: What happened in Palestine in 1948? (Article)
The Nakba did not start or end in 1948 (Article)
Donations and charities:
Al-Shabaka
Electronic Intifada
Adalah Justice Project
IMEU Fundraiser
Medical Aid for Palestinians
Palestine Children’s Relief Fund
Addameer
Muslim Aid
Palestine Red Crescent
Gaza Mutual Aid Patreon
Books:
A New Critical Approach to the History of Palestine
The Idea of Israel: A History of Power and Knowledge
Hidden Histories: Palestine and the Eastern Mediterranean
The Balfour Declaration: Empire, the Mandate and Resistance in Palestine
Queer Palestine and the Empire of Critique
From Haven to Conquest: Readings in Zionism and the Palestine Problem until 1948
Captive Revolution - Palestinian Women’s Anti-Colonial Struggle within the Israeli Prison System
Palestine: A Four Thousand Year History
Except for Palestine: The Limits of Progressive Politics
Before Their Diaspora: A Photographic History of The Palestinians 1876-1948
The Battle for Justice in Palestine Paperback
Uncivil Rites: Palestine and the Limits of Academic Freedom
Palestine Rising: How I survived the 1948 Deir Yasin Massacre
The Transformation of Palestine: Essays on the Origin and Development of the Arab-Israeli Conflict
A Land Without a People: Israel, Transfer, and the Palestinians 1949-1996
The Iron Cage: The Story of the Palestinian Struggle for Statehood
A History of Modern Palestine: One Land, Two Peoples
Where Now for Palestine?: The Demise of the Two-State Solution
Terrorist Assemblages - Homonationalism in Queer Times
Militarization and Violence against Women in Conflict Zones in the Middle East
The one-state solution: A breakthrough for peace in the Israeli-Palestinian deadlock
The Persistence of the Palestinian Question: Essays on Zionism and the Palestinians
Fateful Triangle: The United States, Israel and the Palestinians
The False Prophets of Peace: Liberal Zionism and the Struggle for Palestine
Ten myths about Israel
Blaming the Victims: Spurious Scholarship and the Palestinian Question
Israel and its Palestinian Citizens - Ethnic Privileges in the Jewish State
Palestinians in Israel: Segregation, Discrimination and Democracy
Greater than the Sum of Our Parts: Feminism, Inter/Nationalism, and Palestine
Palestine Hijacked
Palestinian Culture:
Mountain against the Sea: Essays on Palestinian Society and Culture
Palestinian Costume
Traditional Palestinian Costume: Origins and Evolution
Tatreez & Tea: Embroidery and Storytelling in the Palestinian Diaspora
Embroidering Identities: A Century of Palestinian Clothing (Oriental Institute Museum Publications)
The Palestinian Table (Authentic Palestinian Recipes)
Falastin: A Cookbook
Palestine on a Plate: Memories from My Mother’s Kitchen
Palestinian Social Customs and Traditions
Palestinian Culture before the Nakba
Tatreez & Tea (Website)
The Traditional Clothing of Palestine
The Palestinian thobe: A creative expression of national identity
Embroidering Identities:A Century of Palestinian Clothing
Palestine Traditional Costumes
Palestine Family
Palestinian Costume
Encyclopedia of World Dress and Fashion, v5: Volume 5: Central and Southwest Asia
Tent Work in Palestine: A Record of Discovery and Adventure
Documentaries, Films, and Video Essays:
Jenin, Jenin
Born in Gaza
GAZA
Wedding in Galilee
Omar
5 Broken Cameras
OBAIDA
Indigeneity, Indigenous Liberation, and Settler Colonialism (not entirely about Palestine, but an important watch for indigenous struggles worldwide - including Palestine)
Edward Said - Reflections on Exile and Other Essays
Palestine Remix:
AL NAKBA
Gaza Lives On
Gaza we are coming
Lost cities of Palestine
Stories from the Intifada
Last Shepherds of the Valley
Voices from Gaza
Muhammad Smiry
Najla Shawa
Nour Naim
Wael Al dahdouh
Motaz Azaiza
Ghassan Abu Sitta
Refaat Alareer (murdered by Israel - 12/7/2023. Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un)
Plestia Alaqad
Bisan Owda
Ebrahem Ateef
Mohammed Zaanoun
Doaa Mohammad
Hind Khoudary
Palestinian Voices, Organizations, and News
Boycott Divest and Sanction (BDS)
Defense for Children in Palestine
Palestine Legal
Palestine Action
Palestine Action US
United Nations relief and works for Palestinian refugees in the Middle East (UNRWA)
Yunho x Fem (Model) Reader x Yeosang (a little bit, poly but no mxm)
Contents: poly yunsang (polyteez), shower sex sorta, handjob, choking,
Synopsis: When you and Yunho take a little too long in the shower, Yeosang gets impatient and sees what’s taking so long.
You’d had the longest day of your life. In and out of meetings, photoshoots, interviews, brand testing, working on colors for the eyeshadow palette. You just needed to forget everything your brain had to process today. So when your boyfriend, Yunho invited you to wash it all away with him in the shower you couldn’t say no.
You sighed as you stepped under the hot water, getting your hair wet and closing your eyes jsut in time for Yunho to slip in behind you. His arms wrapped around you.
“Long day, love?” He asked as he rubbed gently to your wet stomach.
“Very much so.” You replied, leaning back into him.
“Can I wash your hair?” He offered, When you nodded, he reached for the shampoo, squirting some into his hand before gently massaging it into your scalp, scratching gently with his short nails.
“Oh, that feels so good.” You practically moaned leaning back into him. He let out a gentle laugh.
“Yeah?” He continued. His fingers digging into your head in the best way. He rinsed your hair beofre putting conditioner in and clipping it up.
“You’re good at this. I might just hire you.” He let out a hearty laugh as he grabbed the sponge before running it all over your body.
Soon, the sponge was replaces by his fingers, rubbing up and down your body before his fingers dipped lower.
“Can I touch you?” You gave a tiny giggle.
“You are touching me.” He let out something between a laugh and a sigh.
“You know what I mean.” You squeezed his hand.
“Yes, you can.” His fingers dipped down over your stomach before finding you clit, drawing slow circles. You let your head lull back against his shoulder, closing your eyes. You pulled his other hand over to your breast as you leaned into the feeling of him. He alternated between squeezing your boobs and playing with your nipples as he worked a finger inside your tight hole slowly.
“Yunho.” You moaned as he rested his chin on your shoulder. He dipped his finger deeper, hooking it to hit that spot that made you moan. You snuck your hand between your bodies to wrap around his length, giving a soft tug as you slid your hand up his dick. You ran your thumb along his slit, collectingt he little bit of precum that had dribbled out. He moaned into your ear, his eyes fluttering shut.
“Keep doing that, love.” He begged. Your hand kept time with his. As his now two fingers pumped in and out of you slowly your hand glided up and down his cock.
“Yunho!” You cried as he sped up.
“I need you. Now.” He said hauling you our of the shower and bending you over the bathroom counter in what felt like a breath. You were dizzy with need as you looked into the steam covered mirror. He didn’t even bother to turn the shower off before he kicked your legs apart and aligned himself at your entrance. He grabbed your hips pulling you back onto him. You couldn’t help how your legs shook at the stretch. Yunho had always been bigger, but now without your usual amount of prep, he felt huge. You could feel how deep he was everywhere in your body. He pulled out slowly before pushing back in.
“Oh— fuck.” You moaned as your body lit up like a christmas tree. You yelped his name only to be met with banging at the door.
“Hurry up! I still need to shower too!” Yeosang yelled from the other side of the door. Yunho paused before he leaned over opening the door.
“So shower.” He said before starting to fuck you from behind once more. A high pitched moan came from your lips as you made eye contact with Yeosang. He looked at the shower still running and then back to you before a small smirk came to his lips. He walked over, leaning against the counter where you were bent over, smiling at you as Yunho continued to fuck you into oblivion. You looked up at Yeosang through blinking eyes.
“Is Yunho making you feel really good, baby?” He grabbed your chin has you nodded your head. He slipped his thumb inside your open mouth humming as you sucked on it. “Why don’t you see for yourself what you look like right now.” He cleared a spot off on the fogged up mirror with his free hand before tilting your head so your face looked directly into the clear slot.
“Look at yourself.” He said as he held your head in place, the hand moving down to squeeze your throat. “Don’t drop your head.” You obeyed him, looking at your fucked out face in the mirror as Yunho kept fucking you so good. It wasn’t long after that the knot in your stomach started to tighten.
With Yeosang’s hand wrapped tightly around your neck and Yunho’s cock carving out a space inside you, your cried out a warning. You were gonna fall apart soon surrounded by the roommates. Yunho and Yeosang made eye contact, smiling. Yeosang turned your head kissing you deeply, his tongue sliding into your mouth as Yunho doubled his efforts. In what felt like a white hot second, you came on Yunho’s cock, crying into Yeosang’s mouth. Yeosang continued to kiss you, holding your head in place as Yunho rode out your orgasm as his came crashing down onto him. He moaned beautifully in your ear before biting down on your shoulder with a throaty groan. As he slowed to a stop, he left you panting into Yeosang’s mouth. Yeosang pulled back to see your blissed out face. His thumb stroked your cheek as he looked into your eyes.
“Take your shower, Yeosang.” Yunho breathed from behind you.
IN WHICH With his father’s sudden illness, his carefree life comes to an end. It’s expected of him to take over the throne and fulfill his first born duties, one of them being having a queen by his side. He doesn’t see the point, doesn’t want to trap a woman in a marriage with him knowing there could be someone out there who would make her happier, but the matter is not in his hands, and the least he can do for his people is marry. Even if it means living with someone he has no feelings for.
pairing » first born!Seungcheol x first born!fem!reader
genre » fluff, smut, angst
featuring » other svt members, Daniela (katseye), Yeonjun, Soobin and Taehyun (txt), original characters, Riki (enhypen), Mingi (ateez)
contains » arranged marriage, alcohol consumption, anxiety, dual pov, reader has siblings, protective!Seungcheol, slowburn, marriage, oldest daughter!reader, oldest son!seungcheol, mention of illness, jealous!seungcheol, reader is mentioned to be 25, jealous!reader, drunk dudes objectifying women in one instance, food mentions
warnings » SMUT, oral (f. & m. rec.), unprotected sex, breeding kink, praise, body worship, virgin!reader, fingering
word count » 40k
↪ izzy adds... oh what a journey this was. I can't believe I finally finished writing this. Honestly, I wouldn't have if it weren't for the people on my side. As always, thank you yun @filmsbyun for writing with me, reassuring me at times where I felt like this entire thing sucked, and helping me brainstorm. Thank you to luna @belovedgyu and rae @nerdycheol as well for their support and excitement whenever I shared a bit with them and also when I showed them the whole thing. You were both great hype women. Then lastly, thank you to Viv @heartepub for helping me beta read and making sure I'm not just putting out bullshit into the world <3 I appreciate all of you so much
playlist | veloria tales | svt m.list
“This is the third week His Majesty, the King, hasn't been able to join us. I think it’s time,” Kaito, the council representative, proclaims as he looks around the throne room. William, the King’s Head Advisor, stands right beside him, looking slightly awkward. Seungcheol follows Kaito’s gaze, meeting eyes with his brothers.
The two of them are the embodiment of opposites. While Kaito stands with his head high, confident in himself and what he brings in front of the Princes on council’s behalf, William’s head is rather down, his posture flawed. Kaito towers over him with his black hair covering his forehead and hiding the pimples that still sometimes appear on his skin. On the other hand, William’s gray locks fall into his blue eyes, wrinkles covering his whole face. He is old, not as old as his father, but it shows.
Still, they’ve both proven themselves more than enough, always getting the King out of trouble when needed. It’d be foolish for the Prince and his brothers to question their judgment.
“His Majesty’s condition is stable at the moment, but the chance of getting better is slim, Your Royal Highness,” Wonwoo, the King’s best Doctor, explains, and Cheol hums.
“What shall we do then, William?” He asks, turning to face the Head Advisor again. He clears his throat, briefly glancing at the Queen in the corner before looking at the three Princes in front of him again.
“It’d probably be for the best if a new King takes over. So that in the eyes of people, the change looks like His Majesty’s retirement instead of a sign of weakness.”
“Everyone agreed on this?” Cheol raises an eyebrow and William nods, making him sigh.
“This is the best we can do for our kingdom and its people,” Kaito assures him. There’s not much he can do if the council deemed this the right move. He’s been raised for this exact moment, trained in etiquette, strategy, and politics just so he could take over the throne and lead the people one day.
He just hasn’t expected for the day to come so soon.
“I assume coronation shall be as soon as possible?” Joshua, the second born, questions, finally letting the room know of his presence. The council representative exchanges a glance with the Doctor, agreeing.
“When?” Cheol asks, his mind clouded with what this change might bring. No more sneaking around the palace and drinking in the kitchens with his lords, no more sword fights with his friends just because they were bored, and no more fooling around.
“Yesterday preferably, Your Royal Highness.”
“Let me change my question,” Seungcheol tilts his head, his irritation building up at all the stalling. He just wants to get this over with. “When is the earliest you can arrange a coronation? And make my father as presentable as possible so he doesn’t faint while placing the crown on my head?”
“His Majesty is in the best care. We’re trying hard to make sure he feels better,” Wonwoo proclaims, making the Prince grit his teeth.
“When?”
“A month,” Kaito interrupts. “Give us a month to prepare everything, Your Royal Highness.” The Prince runs his hand through his black hair, nodding.
“Is that all for today? I feel rather tired.”
“Of course, sire.”
He wants to speak up again, admonish the council member for his mistake because he isn’t the King, thou should not be called a sire, but he bites the words back. Because that’s what he is now, isn’t he? The King. And this is something he’ll have to get used to.
“Everyone leave,” he dismisses them, stopping Joshua and Chan when they try to step away. “You two stay.” The two younger exchange a glance, watching everyone else leave the throne room after the Prince’s command. The new role suits him more than he realizes.
“Your Majesty,” Chan mocks a bow as soon as everyone is gone, making Cheol scoff.
“Don’t call me that. It’s weird.”
“It’s what you’re going to be,” Joshua reminds him. “The King. Our King.”
“I hope you’ll leave me some land when you start ruling,” the youngest mumbles, making his way to the throne and plopping down as if it’d belong to him. “I guess I won’t get the chance to sit here in front of our people.”
“Do you want to?” Cheol raises his eyebrow. “I’ll gladly get the burden off my back and leave the kingdom to you.”
Joshua shakes his head, “for that we’d both have to fall dead and so far, I’m still enjoying my life. So no, thank you.”
“He could also fight me for the crown,” he shrugs, meeting the youngest’s eyes. “If that’s what he feels like doing, of course.” Chan quickly stands up and walks from the throne, his eyes flashing with the realization of what they are talking about. If he wasn’t so lucky, and his brother wasn’t so understanding, he might as well drop dead for treason.
It’s quiet for a beat before Joshua speaks again. “Who’s going to inform our sister?”
The oldest immediately shakes his head, shutting down the conversation before it can start. “She doesn’t need to bother herself with such things. Politics shall not burden her, she’s too young.”
“She’s my twin,” Chan reminds him.
“And she is also a Princess,” Cheol argues. The two younger Princes exchange a look, saying everything with their eyes. As much as they love Seungcheol and everything he does for them, sometimes his best interest doesn’t align with their sister’s, and they know it bothers her. But as the soon-to-be King of Veloria, there is nothing they can say to him.
“She shall know her father is slowly dying.”
“I’m sure William has that covered. One of her ladies-in-waiting might tell her.”
Joshua raises his eyebrow, “and you think that’s how she shall find out? From one of her gossip-loving ladies?”
“If you want to take it upon yourself to tell her, feel free to,” Cheol brushes him off. “But don’t let her think we need her help. She might want to jump into a marriage just to help with alliances and help people think about other things while our father goes. You know her.”
Joshua nods. That’s the best he can do at the moment anyway. Arguing would be pointless. He is right. He can never predict what their sister will do at times of crisis. Because no matter how far away the oldest Prince wants to keep her from politics, she was raised by her mother, a woman who always believed Princesses were good for more than just standing beside a King and giving him an heir.
♡⸝⸝
It’s safe to say the following days are hectic.
Seungcheol moves around the palace with William behind him, pointing out everyone he should know and greet so as to not make any enemies for the kingdom. It surprises him how many lords and ladies from different kingdoms are currently paying a visit to them. The word of a new King coming on the throne spread fast, and lords from all around the world came to show their faces and remind him of their places, while their mothers showed off their daughters, hoping for the future King to choose them as his future wife.
“It is true you shall find a Queen to stand by your side and show the people you’re as strong a ruler as the previous King, Your Royal Highness.”
“Why is a Queen necessary for this?” He raises his eyebrow, smiling as he walks past servants in the halls.
“You need an heir. And when the people see they’re led by a pair of people who love each other, it always helps.”
“But you don’t want me to marry for love,” he thinks out loud, making William blink a few times at his sudden boldness before he regains his calm demeanor.
“Love comes in many forms, Your Highness. Some people never fall in love, and some die from loving too hard.”
“Which one is your case?” Cheol wonders, never looking back to meet his eyes.
“I don’t have time for love, Your Highness.”
“That’s unfortunate,” he mumbles. It’s the last thing he says for a while after, simply nodding as William helps him grasp everything.
But if he is honest, his help feels more like nagging. Nothing Cheol says or does seems like enough, and William gives him a disapproving look on his every step. Eventually, he gives up, shutting down completely and just listening. He bites his tongue, pushing back all the insults and arguments that build in the back of his throat every time the Head Advisor treats him like a child, a little, naive Prince who shouldn’t come to power just yet.
It’s clear he doesn’t like the idea of Seungcheol taking over but there is nothing he can do about it, not when the King has barely moved in the past month, resting in his bed with maids running around him, making sure he has everything he needs.
It really doesn’t feel great. It’s not like he asked for the power. If he could, he’d leave the crown to his father for another hundred years. But that’s impossible, and William has to accept that just like he did. He is the crown Prince, the first born of the Veloria King, and as much freedom it gave him, as much responsibility it brings.
“Let’s call it a night,” Cheol interrupts William’s rambling about the coronation. He’s barely comprehending any of the information, too tired to register the words as they leave William’s lips. It’d be better for both of them if they just leave this for a different day.
William squeezes his eyes shut, waving off the maid that just came inside so they’re left alone in the throne room again. “Your Highness, this can’t wait any longer. Your coronation is near and people are whispering about it. It needs to be perfect. Based on how it goes, your reign will follow,” the words rot on his lips, making it more than obvious he isn’t happy with the amount of things he has to explain and teach the new King.
“How fancy you make my coronation has nothing to do with how I’ll rule my kingdom,” the Prince disagrees, waving at the knights guarding the door to open them because he is leaving. “I’ll see you tomorrow, William. Hopefully we are both in a better mood, otherwise our conversation will be far from pleasant.”
The door shuts behind him again, leaving the Head Advisor standing there, frustration building up. He needs the King to get back on his feet. And he needs it now. “Call for Doctor Wonwoo. I need to speak to him.” One of the guards nods, excusing himself before leaving the room to fetch the Doctor.
Seungcheol drops on his bed, allowing his eyes to close for a short second and his mind relax. It’s been a long day, and all he wants to do is turn it off and let others deal with everything. It might have worked had he still only had the responsibilities of a Prince, but right now, he has more things on his plate. He needs to think of the coronation, his sick father, protecting his people, and finding a Queen.
He needs to sit down tomorrow and listen to all of William’s suggestions. If he’s lucky, by the end of his speech, he’ll be able to pick a wife.
It feels wrong to think about it like this. He knows why it’s important to marry, why it’s expected of him, but the thought of trapping an innocent woman in order to make a new ally is ridiculous. He saw what marriage has done with his father. For eight years, he looked miserable, putting on a fake act every time he was asked to pose with Joshua’s mother for a portrait. They were even less than business partners.
On the other hand, he also saw the way his father’s eyes lit up every time his third wife walked into the room. The way he showered her in love and did his best to raise Chan and his twin sister right. Whenever he spoke of his wife, it was like a story from a fairy tale. A man truly loving a woman. It was a rare sight in this society, but not non-existent.
Cheol always knew that wasn’t written in his stars. His sibling might have a shot, they might be able to walk the Earth and take their time choosing a partner whom they love, but it wasn’t meant for him. His role was clear. He is meant to marry the Princess who brings the most for his kingdom and produce an heir with her. It’s expected for them to be business partners and treat each other as so while searching for love and pleasure elsewhere.
A loud knock on the door interrupts his thoughts, making him raise his head. “Yes?” He calls out and the door opens, his eyes meeting with Joshua’s. He’s not alone, though — three other men stand by his side with grins on their faces and alcohol bottles in hands. He smirks, nodding at the guards outside his door to let them in.
He stands up from his bed, watching his two brothers, one of his closest friends Mingyu, and Joshua’s lord-in-waiting — Choi Yeonjun — step inside. “Taehyun, get us more bottles from the kitchen and don’t let anyone else in. If William wants to speak to me, tell him to wait till the morning, no matter how important he says it is.” The guard at the Prince’s door nods, bowing slightly before closing the room and leaving to fulfill his task.
“We heard it was a hard day, King,” Mingyu teases, getting Cheol to roll his eyes. They all take a seat on the bed, kicking their boots off and settling the champagne and beer bottles in front of them.
“So we thought we could cheer you up,” Chan grins, already opening one of the bottles.
“William makes me sick every time I’m around him,” Cheol admits, taking another sip of his beer. He’s not sure how much he had until now, but he knows he’s getting tipsy.
“You can name a new Head Advisor after your coronation,” Lord Choi speaks up, sharing a champagne bottle with Chan.
Cheol’s eyes widen, the realization he doesn’t have to spend his ruling with William behind his back settling it. “Who would I name, though?”
“How about Seungkwan?” Mingyu suggests with a shrug. The moment all eyes land on him he wishes he hasn’t said anything after all. It’s been years since he’s gotten close to the Princes, and it still feels like he is doing something wrong when he is around them. He doesn’t address them by their titles when they are alone or holds his tongue like other guards, always worried they might change their opinion on him and send him away for disrespecting the royal family.
But the truth is far from it, and Seungcheol feels grateful to him every time he is around. He can’t remember a time of his life where he’s been able to laugh freely and forget about his title. With Mingyu, he can do so. And even just this one person, one person who doesn’t care about his rank or if he’ll make a good impression, is enough.
“The scholar?” Joshua questions. “I’ve heard about him.”
“Is he good?” Cheol blinks, trying to match the name with a face.
“The best,” he agrees. “I heard he’s the best student the academy has had in years.”
“He knows politics and finds interest in other royal families. He might even know your weaknesses,” Mingyu explains, catching the Prince’s interest.
“Do you guys think William will get mad if I ask him about naming a new Head Advisor tomorrow?” The guys laugh, their voices filling the room as they drink into the night, leaving their responsibilities behind for now. It can wait. Ruling can wait.
“Tomorrow, I’ll find myself a wife,” Cheol proclaims, raising his beer bottle high above his head as if he was celebrating.
“A wife?”
He nods, taking a sip. “A Queen. We need one, right? It’s what society wants from me, it’s what you all want from me,” he points at every single one of them, making them raise their brows.
“You’re drunk,” Joshua points out. “You should sleep.”
“I think not,” he argues. The thought of going to sleep just for tomorrow to arrive isn’t pleasant. If he’s lucky, he’ll last until the morning and convince his guards not to let anyone in because he is sick. Even though he wouldn’t be surprised if William bothered him despite it.
Rather than looking like a fool who can’t hold his alcohol in the morning, maybe he should go to sleep. He needs to look his best and prove to everyone he can be the person they need him to be. The King. A strong leader who knows what to do and how to present himself.
Alright, he can do so.
He waves his hand in the air, sending the four men out. “If you need anything, feel free to call for us, Your Royal Highness,” Yeonjun proclaims, staying in the right mind even with alcohol staining his breath.
“Yes,” he nods, just to show he comprehends what he is saying. Even though he’s not sure if he truly does. The alcohol is making its way to his head.
“Good night, brother,” Chan smiles, patting his shoulder lightly. “May the alcohol leave your body before William finds you.” Mingyu beside him snickers and Joshua nudges him, shaking his head.
“Good night, our future King of Veloria,” Mingyu bows, his lips curved into a teasing smile. But Seungcheol can’t find it in himself to care enough, the only thing on his mind right now being the great sleep he is going to get.
Everything is happening too fast.
You’re not ready, you realize as you look outside of your chamber window, taking in the sight of the beautiful garden. Your grip on the edge tightens as you steady yourself, your head spinning. It feels like you can’t breathe. You close your eyes, taking a deep breath with your mouth and counting down numbers.
Ten, nine, eight…
When that doesn’t work, you open your eyes again, focusing on the garden in front of you. Lilies, roses, daisies, foxgloves, anemones… You take a deep breath again, calming yourself as your eyes scan every flower in the garden.
“My lady, are you okay?” You turn around with a smile when you hear Daniela’s voice, putting on the best show you can.
“Never been better,” you lie, glancing out of the window once more before paying her your full attention. “What is it?” You wonder, hoping your smile is convincing enough and she won’t ask any more questions.
“The carriage is ready. Your family is waiting for you,” she informs you, and you feel like throwing up.
It’s too fast.
You nod either way, following her through the hallway as you go over the flowers in your garden again. When you get outside and the cold air hits your face, you feel better immediately. Daniela, your lady-in-waiting, tells you about how excited she is to step her feet into the Veloria kingdom, and how lucky your family is to be asked to join the coronation of the future King Seungcheol. You tune out her words, focusing on the laughter of kids running around the gardens and your mother's voice as she admonishes your brother to stop jumping around.
You’ve heard it many times in the past week. It’s always the same story too. You’re being constantly reminded of how grateful you should be for being the one the future King of Veloria noticed because it means you don’t have to worry about your future anymore and can live at ease that you won’t end up a spinster. But you feel everything but ease.
You never counted on getting married for love, it was always obvious your father would find you and your sisters the right lover that could help your kingdom grow. You can’t even blame him for it, because it is the right thing to do in his situation. A part of you just wishes it wouldn’t be so soon, and that you could at least have some say in who you’re marrying.
“Darling,” your mother, the Queen, welcomes you with a smile. It’s way cleaner compared to your half-assed one.
“Mother,” you drop into a curtsy, your head down as you bend your knees.
“We are late.”
“Then we shall get inside,” you interrupt her before she can continue, glancing back at Daniela so she can join you in the carriage with your siblings.
She simply shakes her head with an apology, making you frown. “Darling, join our carriage so we can enjoy your company while it lasts,” your mother’s voice is sweet and for a second, you forget why you’re so scared of this change. She makes you feel like there’s nothing to worry about, that courting and marrying a complete stranger is alright. You nod, smiling at your younger siblings as you walk past them before sliding into the carriage where your father is already waiting.
You sit opposite him while your mother joins his side, wrapping her arm around his with a smile on her face. You’re not sure if they’ve ever been in love. If they got to experience the feeling you’ve read so much about. Even a simple moment where their heart would race faster, their head spinning, or the physical pain in their chest from not being near each other.
You’d like to believe your mother knows the feeling. That she does love your father in her own way and all her smiles are genuine, but you’d be a liar if you said you think your father feels the same. But their marriage works, and that’s what matters, right? They’ve had four beautiful children and even though they might not be in love in the same way you read about, they’re good together and understand each other.
Maybe you can find that when you marry as well. It might not be love, but understatement is just as good, isn’t it? You’ve heard many great things about Prince Seungcheol. Apparently his education is excellent, his face more than worthy of his title, and his kindness overwhelming. If he’s even half as good as people say, there shouldn’t be any problems with coming to an agreement that suits both parties.
“Father, have you thought about how long you’ll stay with us yet?” You ask as the carriage starts and the sound of the horses in front moving reaches your ears.
“We’ll see after the coronation of the new Veloria King,” he says and you nod, knowing that’s the most you’ll get out of him. If you could have a say, you’d ask for them to stay until the day of your wedding, but you doubt they’d even as much as consider asking for your opinion on the matter. You’ll be lucky if they even find the time to visit you on your wedding day.
“Darling, how are you feeling?”
You glance at your mother, offering her another one of your smiles. “I’m great,” you lie. “I’ve been talking about Prince Seungcheol with my ladies-in-waiting and can’t wait to meet him.”
“Can’t wait to see if the gossips are true?” Your father interrupts and your eyes widen.
You quickly shake it off, disagreeing. “I haven’t heard any gossip, father. My ladies-in-waiting only assured me of the Prince’s kind heart and academic achievements.” He hums, and you wonder what’s on his mind. Is there anything else you should know about the Prince? Should you feel worried?
You brush the thoughts aside before they overtake you, glancing outside the carriage and watching the nature pass you by. If you’re looking forward to something, it’s the large garden of Veloria Kingdom you’ve read about in your childhood. You want to see the new scenery, much more than the Prince if you’re honest.
There’s a number of servants waiting for you and your family when you arrive. You step out of the carriage with the help of one of the knights, immediately looking around and taking in the sight.
“My lady.” You snap out of your thoughts and look at the knight beside you. “Let me take you to your chamber so you can settle in.” You nod, briefly glancing at your siblings before following the knight’s lead.
“What is your name?” You wonder, looking around as you walk through the halls.
“Kang Taehyun,” the knight answers without sparing you as much as a glance. He doesn’t say much but you expected that. Some might consider it rude if he decided to start a chat. No one can say anything if it’s you asking him questions, though.
“What’s the shortest way to get to the gardens, Taehyun?”
You listen carefully as he explains the floor plan of the palace to you, picturing the way you’ll go in your head. “There’s no need for you to worry about that, Your Highness. There shall always be a knight ready to assist you when you want to go on a stroll.”
You hum back. It’s no surprise, but that doesn’t mean you weren’t hoping for more freedom. “How about my lady-in-waiting? Can’t she accompany me instead?”
“We’ve been asked to look after you at any time, Your Highness,” he answers simply, stopping when he reaches your chamber. “Dinner will be in an hour. Until then, if you need anything, I’ll be here.” You shake your head, walking past him and closing the door behind you. It’s only then that you feel like you can breathe properly. You take a moment to relax before looking around the large room, appreciating the work they did for you. Everything is perfect, neat.
You walk around your new room for a while, picking out a new dress for the dinner and laying it down on your bed. You could probably fit three more dresses there. It makes you wonder just how large the King’s bed must be if this is what you get. Even your room is much bigger than the one back home. It doesn’t surprise you that it’s Prince Seungcheol whom your father deemed appropriate for you. Alliance with a kingdom like this could help your homeland a lot.
You open the door again, finding Taehyun already waiting for you. It catches you off guard, making you flinch. He clears his throat, not a single sign of emotion on his face as he looks at you. You shake your head slightly, reminding yourself why you came out. “Hi,” you smile. “Could you please get me a maid or my lady-in-waiting? I need help changing into my dress for dinner.” You watch his eyes trail behind you, noticing the light pink dress on your bed. He nods, not questioning anything as he turns on his heel.
You watch him leave the hallway, closing the door behind you as you wander through the chamber, following his guide and getting outside again, straight into the gardens.
They are as beautiful as the books painted them to be. You can’t get enough as you take in the sight of the flowers around you, breathing in the fresh air. While everything about your situation feels fast, making your heart race, it all slows down when you walk through the Veloria gardens, taking your time with exploring them. You know you should hurry, that Taehyun is most certainly looking for you by now, but you’d rather risk not being able to look at everything today — which you know you won’t be able to do either way if you want to be on time for the dinner — than rushing it and making the one place that calms you do the opposite.
“Your Highness.”
You stop in your walk, a smile on your face. It came later than you expected. You don’t turn completely, letting Taehyun wait for a moment longer as you take in the sight of the lilies in front of you. He comes closer to you, stopping right beside you and looking at the same flowers. It’s only then that you look up, blinking confusedly when it’s not Taehyun on your side.
“I’m sorry,” you apologize even though you’re not truly sure what for. Getting here without an escort? Not recognizing him? Stepping here uninvited? Maybe all of the above, actually.
“What for?” He tilts his head, taking in the sight of you. You hesitate, opening your mouth before closing it again. He smiles, resting his right hand over his heart and bowing, “Seungcheol,” is all he says.
But it’s enough to make your eyes widen, realization hitting in. “Your Royal Highness,” you quickly drop into a courtesy, closing your eyes in regret. You should have realized. This was stupid of you, so, so stupid—
“Please, Seungcheol is fine,” he holds your hand in his, helping you straighten again. You gaze into his eyes, swallowing nervously. He looks around again, encouraging you to walk with him. You do, of course you do, glancing at him every now and then, worried you just ruined your first impression.
Despite your nervousness, he doesn’t seem to be bothered by your slip up at all. His dark eyes stay focused on the path ahead, black strands falling in front of them. His eyebrows are thick, his white shirt unbuttoned at the top, exposing bits of his skin. The longer you look at him, the more you understand everything you’ve heard about him. He is handsome. You can see why Princesses from other kingdoms were so eager to meet him, hoping it’d be them he’d pick as his future wife. It also makes you wonder a lot more what led him to choosing you. Out of all the young Princesses looking for a spouse, why was it you he decided to pay attention to?
“Was your ride here okay?” He breaks the silence after a moment.
“Perfect, Your Royal Highness.”
He chuckles, shaking his head slightly. Looks like he’ll have to earn his way for you to call him by his name instead of his title. “And you? How are you feeling, my lady?”
You put on the same fake smile you showed everyone back home as you look at him and lie again. “Peachy, Your Royal Highness. It’s an honor to be here.”
He hums at your response, noticing the light drop of your eyes when you talk. It’s clear you’re lying, but it’s also clear you won’t tell him the truth even if he asks. So instead, he settles for the more sensible approach, changing the topic of conversation. “I’ve heard about your interest in our gardens, is that why you ran away from your guard?”
“My apologies, I didn’t mean to,” you quickly shake your head. “It won’t happen again.”
“That wasn’t my question,” his voice is gentle as he talks to you, much gentler than you expected. The Princes you’ve had the honor of meeting weren’t exactly welcoming, always making you feel like they were above you, like you were theirs to play with. But Prince Seungcheol doesn’t make you feel that way. You feel almost equal.
You nod slightly, looking at the path ahead of you. “I’ve read about your gardens my whole life, about everything they have to offer. And I must tell you, none of the books I’ve read grasp the feeling of being here enough. What you have here is truly special.”
“I’m glad they are to your liking,” he glances at you, meeting your eyes. You offer him a smile, this time a real one. “You are free to visit anytime. And if you have any questions, or suggestions, one of our gardeners will love to listen,” his eyes trail off, finding one of the men keeping the Veloria gardens in their beauty across the bushes lining your right, pointing him out. “But I’d appreciate it if you visited with one of our guards from now on.”
You part your lips just to push them together again, nodding. He’s not asking for much, the least you can do for him is take a guard with you when you’re going somewhere. Maybe you can get closer to Taehyun this way too and make your time here less lonely. Sure, you have Daniela but she can’t be with you at all times. A royal guard meant to protect you surely can though.
“Of course, Your Royal Highness.”
He stops in his track, turning to face you. “How about Prince?” He offers and you blink confusedly. “If I can’t get you to drop the full title, then how about you just address me as Prince? Prince Seungcheol?”
If your mother saw this, she would have called for your teacher immediately, insisting on having to learn your manners from scratch. You know your place, that no matter the fact you are to be married he is still above you, but it’s hard to think of him that way when he offers you his warm smile, your eyes getting lost in his. Prince Seungcheol makes you want to be close with him, to the point you can drop all your titles and just be comfortable with each other.
But it’s too soon for that.
“Okay,” you nod, “Prince Seungcheol.” His smile grows wider, your cheeks flushed red at the sight of him. He makes you feel warm and for some reason, that feels like more than the love you’ve been reading and dreaming about your whole life. Maybe getting married won’t be that bad, maybe you and the Prince can find more than just an understanding like you thought at first.
Taehyun is waiting in front of your room when you and the Prince come back and you give him an apologetic smile. “There are two maids waiting for you inside as well as your lady-in-waiting,” he informs you, stepping aside so you can walk inside.
“Thank you.” You turn around once more before opening the door, looking at Seungcheol once more.
He bows with a smile, “I’ll see you in a bit, my lady.” You drop into a courtesy as well, not saying anything as you watch him turn on his heel and walk down the hall, probably to his own chamber. As handsome as he might have looked earlier, a plain shirt certainly isn’t what he wants to be seen in at a formal dinner with both of your families.
“I’m sorry for running off on you,” you turn to Taehyun. “It won’t happen again.”
“Please, don’t be mistaken. Hadn’t it been for Prince’s eagerness to meet you as soon as possible, I would have found you as soon as you stepped out of your chamber,” he assures you and you blink confusedly. But before you can ask what he means, the door behind you opens, and Daniela is tugging you inside.
“We’re late, Princess, hurry.” That’s all Taehyun hears before the door shuts closed again right in his face, a heavy sigh leaving his lips as he turns his back to your door again, looking ahead while listening to your muffled laughs.
Seungcheol sits at the head of the table, his brothers and sister on his right. Your parents, The King and The Queen of Elowen sit on his left, indulging in a conversation with Joshua about the coronation. He watches them quietly, but the words start blending together. He can’t focus on them fully, his leg bouncing under the table as he waits for your arrival while thinking about how your youngest sister looks exactly like you when she laughs at something your brother said.
William stands behind him in the corner of the dining room alongside a few guards as well, watching the entire scene. Seungcheol doesn’t need to look at him to know he is impatient, probably already forming a speech in his head that he’ll have to hear later. He chuckles at the thought, clearing his throat and straightening his back again when he sees your parents glancing his way.
Truth is, the longer you take to get here the more he regrets keeping you out for so long. William has been against the idea of inviting you out of all the Princesses from start, and every imperfection he can find about you or your behavior only adds to the list of complaints he’ll have towards the council, hoping to send you back to Elowen before you can even settle in.
It’s his fault that you’re late right now, but how is he supposed to explain to the council that he’s kept you out with him without an escort or a lady-in-waiting to rush you back just because he wanted to get to know you better? Despite it being an open setting, he can already imagine the rumors that would start. Even though you’re to be his wife, the Queen of Veloria, it’d still look bad, and starting his ruling with people looking at him weird right off the bat isn’t something he wants to do.
The door finally comes open and Cheol snaps out of his thoughts, meeting eyes with you. A smile spreads on his lips as he takes in the sight of you, doing his best to calm you when he sees how your eyes flicker around the room. Your lady-in-waiting walks right behind you, stopping at the entrance which seems to only freak you out more as you look back at her.
“Why don’t you come eat with us, lady…” he trails off, waiting for her to introduce herself. She does, dropping into a courtesy as her name slips past her lips. “Lady Avanzini,” he repeats after her, motioning with his hand towards an empty seat beside his sister.
“Your Royal Highness,” William admonishes him, but he ignores it entirely, assuring her it’s okay. Once she sits down at the table, your shoulders visibly relax and you take a seat on the other side of the table, right opposed to Seungcheol.
“You look beautiful tonight, my lady,” he smiles at you, watching as you look down at your pink dress. His comment seems to please not only you but also your mother, a smile spreading on her face as she takes in the sight of you.
Seungcheol clears his throat, standing up from his place and raising his glass of champagne. “If I could have your attention for a moment.” All eyes land on him without hesitation and he makes the mistake of looking at his brothers, regretting it as soon as he meets eyes with Chan. How is he supposed to be serious when he looks like he’ll laugh at him the second he opens his mouth again?
“It is an honor to welcome the royal family of Elowen to Veloria as not just guests but kin,” he shares a smile with your parents, avoiding looking to his right where his family sits. “Coronation is near and it makes me pleased to know I won’t be standing there alone but with a beautiful woman that will soon be my Queen,” his gaze softens when he meets your eyes, letting you reassure him as much as he reassures you.
“May this union strengthen our land, our people, and our bonds,” he raises his glass slightly higher. “To peace, and to Her Royal Highness.” Everyone raises their glasses, smiles on their faces as they cheer to the starting connection, your younger sibling slightly out of place as they debate if it’s appropriate to raise their glasses with juice. He watches your sister hiss at them to keep quiet and just follow your parents’ lead, a soft laugh leaving his lips.
The food is served shortly after, the room busy as people come and leave again with trails full of drinks and food, the cutlery clinking against the utensils, conversations filling their surroundings. Seungcheol keeps his eyes on his siblings this time, listening to his sister’s speech about the importance of first impressions and how he’s aced them while his brothers tease him. But despite keeping his eyes on them, he can feel your stare on him from across the table, guilt creeping in as he thinks about what might be going through your head.
There were plenty of women William offered to him, pointing out the strengths of each of them. But the only thing that stuck with him was the information about you. It was far from love at first sight, quite the opposite if he’s honest.
He thought you were a safe option. Smart, beautiful, the oldest of the four Elowen heirs. He thought that, maybe, since you’ve been taught love wasn’t in your cards since the start just like him, marrying you could save you from being trapped in a marriage with a different noble far worse than him. Being with him was never supposed to be love. But understanding? Freedom? He could give you those. But as he thinks back to your flushed cheeks earlier and the way your eyes are looking at him in this crowded room, he’s worried again about trapping a woman who loves him when he can’t do the same.
He swallows his worries, focusing on his sibling as best as he can. The only thing left for him now is hope. Hope that he is wrong about you.
♡⸝⸝
Your mother’s eyes are welcoming, much more than he expected. He can’t imagine having the same warm smile on his face if it were his sister’s marriage they had been talking about. Maybe Joshua and Chan aren’t that far from the truth, maybe he is too protective of her. But what is he supposed to do? He knows how dangerous the world can be, how dangerous the men — despite calling themselves gentlemen — can be. He’d give anything to keep her safe.
“I’m seriously honored for being able to sit with you tonight,” Cheol smiles at both of your parents, glancing at William standing impatiently on the other side of the room. “Duties call but I hope you’ll feel at home during your stay. I’ll try to make myself available to accompany you to dinner again but I’m sure you know how preparations like this can get,” he excuses himself and your mother gives his forearm a light squeeze, saying her farewell with a smile.
“Dinner was supposed to last only until you were done eating,” William complains but Seungcheol doesn’t pay him any attention, leaving the dining room with his brothers right behind him.
He thinks back to the look in your eyes as he walks through the palace, tuning out his brothers’ chatters. He feels bad, far worse than he hoped he would. But the thought of his upcoming wedding, and what it’d mean for the two of you scares him. He wishes his father would magically get better every day more and more.
“We’re sorry for the delay,” he mutters an apology as he takes a seat on his father’s throne — soon to be his throne, he has to remind himself. Kaito stands on his side alongside Seungkwan as per his request, shaking his head.
“We’re simply glad you could join us, Your Royal Highness. As well as your brothers,” Kaito bows his head towards them, glancing at William. “I understand this is a matter of the future of Veloria.”
“Yes, precisely,” William agrees, his eyes locking to an awkward Seungkwan who has no idea why he was invited to join such a meeting. “I’m sorry, who are you?”
The young scholar clears his throat, glancing at Seungcheol for reassurance before speaking. “Boo Seungkwan, sir. I’m here per His Highness request.”
“His Highness?” The words rot on his tongue as he looks to face the future King comfortable sprawled on the throne. “This is an inner matter. Nothing the nescient outsiders shall know of.”
“And that is precisely why I asked him to join us today,” Seungcheol interrupts. “Seungkwan is no outsider. He is important to me and I'd like for him to join us today,” Seungcheol takes great pleasure in disagreeing with his Head Advisor and being the only one who truly knows why Seungkwan is here today — so he can test his abilities.
“Your Royal Highness—”
“It’s been decided,” Seungcheol brushes him off. “Seungkwan shall keep us company as we talk. Who knows, maybe I'll like an opinion of a fresh blood.”
“Of course, Your Highness,” William mutters through gritted teeth. If he feels anything, it's anger, though. He is well aware of the way the council has been trying to get rid of him ever since they got power but until today, he could have done something with it. It didn’t matter what the council thought as long as he had the King’s support, and King Choi had never even thought about replacing him.
“Excellent. Then we shall get to business. You wanted to complain about my future wife I assume?” He tilts his head, the power he feels as he looks down at him from the throne unbeatable. He wonders if his father felt the same way sitting here, if looking down on his people made him the King he was. He’s not sure if that’s what he wants, if his father’s footsteps are the best example he should follow. That is also a part of the reason he wishes for a Head Advisor change, ignoring the fact he certainly isn’t William’s biggest fan.
“Before we start talking about the coronation — Yes, I’d like to inform you of Princess’ messiness, and lack of responsibility,” William starts and Cheol already feels annoyed, locking eyes with Joshua, hoping he’ll somehow come and save him. “She doesn’t care of time and rather spends her time gossiping with her lady-in-waiting than focusing on things that matter.”
“Is that true?” Kaito asks, his eyes flickering between Seungcheol and William.
“Far from it,” Cheol disagrees. “She’s knowledgeable, she carries great responsibility and what might interest you the most — alliance with her father’s kingdom will be a great advantage for us at times of war. She is of four children, it is also expected for her to be quite fertile so we won’t have to worry about the future of Veloria,” he assures him, hoping it might ease his worries. Though, if he is honest, your fertility is far from his main concerns.
“If I may add,” Chan clears his throat. “She is well studied in politics, much more than all the other Princesses I’ve heard of. Her Royal Highness will only be a positive addition to the kingdom.”
Seungcheol smiles at his brother, giving him a small nod of approval before looking at Kaito and Seungkwan again. “What do you think?”
Seungkwan opens his mouth and closes it again, caught off guard. “I haven’t met Her Highness just yet,” he says, panicked. Seungcheol tilts his head, not very pleased with his response. He is studied, from what he heard he was always on top of his classes, but yet he can’t give his own opinion on a situation? “But from what I know of the Elowen family,” he continues quickly, noting the disappointment on Prince’s face. “Everything the Princes said is true. An alliance in the form of marriage would be great for us.”
That’s more to his liking. Seungcheol smiles, “I don’t think there’s more we need to discuss regarding our future Queen then. The coronation, shall we talk about it?”
William grits his teeth again, knowing this is a lost battle for him. He’s always been the powerful, the one controlling the King, it’s not right that he now gets tossed aside as if he wasn’t the reason the Veloria kingdom has been doing so good in the past few years. “Everything is up to speed,” he proclaims. “Lords and Ladies are coming together to see you on the throne.”
“Doctor Jeon has assured us His Majesty shall be ready to crown you,” Kaito adds. “We’ve been trying to help him get better but the truth is, once you become the new King, it’s most likely he will spend the rest of his time in bed.” The three Princes exchange a look, a silent understanding of what it means for them. Their people might be losing a King, but a King can be replaced. They are losing a father. And no matter how many flaws he’s had, it doesn’t change the fact that a family is dying.
But even then, the three of them can’t understand the great pain his wife has been feeling ever since he first got sick. She’s been by his side through it all, her soft cries filling the room every time the King sleeps. She believes they don’t know, that they don’t notice the pain she bears, but it’s hard not to. And every time Seungcheol sees her, he wants nothing more than to be there for her, be a shoulder to lean on in this wicked time. She might not be his biological mother, but she’s always treated him equal to her children, now he just wants to do the same for her.
“Has Her Majesty eaten anything today?” He blurts out instead of acknowledging what was said.
Kaito clears his throat, apology written all over his face as he looks back at the Prince. “She’s refusing to eat anything unless we find medicine for His Majesty. She stopped speaking to us, too, barely noticing anyone other than the King.” Seungcheol’s knuckles turn white as he grips his hand into a fist, controlling himself not to punch anything. At this point, she’ll die with the King.
“Ask the kitchen to make Her Majesty’s favorite. I’ll pay her a visit.”
The Princes are the only ones left in the room shortly after, their smiles fallen as they look at each other. They’ve studied plenty of things at the academy, but none of their subjects included how to behave when the Queen decides to go down with the King.
“I shall go with you,” Chan mumbles, his confidence low as he keeps his eyes down on his feet. Seungcheol hesitates. He has no right to refuse him. It is his mother after all, but a part of him feels like it’s something he should do on his own. The weight of the eldest son lays heavy on his shoulders, the urge to take all the pain from everyone he knows and bear it instead strong.
“Mind if I go alone this time?” It’s then that their eyes meet, the pain behind the younger’s eyes obvious. “I want to do this. Please, let me.”
“Lord Choi has been wanting to introduce us to some of his friends, he wants to go out to the pub in town tonight,” Joshua wraps his arm around the youngest’s shoulder, sending a reassuring smile towards his older brother. “I could definitely use a distraction, hm?” Chan sighs, a heavy breath that shows just how tired he is. Still, he nods, sending one more glance Cheol’s way before leaving.
The Prince’s back hits the cold throne, his head tilted to the ceiling as he collects his thoughts. He understands the Queen, the urge to be by her loved one when he is in pain. He’d do the same for all three of his siblings, sit with them through it all and try to convince himself it’ll all be okay.
The thought of being in his father’s position stings. When Joshua’s mother had gotten sick, his father didn’t even bat an eye. He sent for the best Doctors, but that was the limit of his care. Would it be the same for him? Would he find himself on his deathbed with no one by his side that would care if he gets better or not, all because he is marrying for power instead of love?
The walk to the King’s chamber is filled with dark thoughts as he makes his way through the halls. This is certainly not the mood he wants to be in before dealing with things but there’s nothing he can do to help it. He’ll have to deal with situations like this later on anyway. It’s only in his favor if he can get used to it before facing his people.
He doesn’t wait for an answer after knocking, coming in. His eyes immediately fall to the Queen, sitting on a damaged chair beside the bed, holding the King’s hand while he sleeps. She doesn’t notice him right away, her hair covering most of her face, her eyes glued to the sleeping man. She’s not even dressed properly, and hadn’t he known better, he wouldn’t have guessed it was the Queen of Veloria in front of him.
Cheol clears his throat, waiting at the door until she looks up and meets his eyes. She quickly wipes away her tears and fixes her hair, putting on her best smile. “Seungcheol,” she greets him, her voice welcoming despite everything.
He smiles at her as well but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Kyong,” he greets her back, stepping forward until he reaches her and placing the trail with her favorite meal between her and the King, hoping his father doesn’t wake up all of a sudden and throw the food to the ground as he turns.
“I’ve already eaten but I’ve heard you haven’t had anything.”
“Oh,” even the little breath she lets out sounds guilty. It truly pains him to see her like this. It’s as if she were just as sick as his father. “I’ll eat later, son.”
“Then I’ll keep you company in the meantime,” he nods, his voice quiet. She averts her eyes from him, glancing briefly at the food before looking at her husband again.
“He’s been sleeping all day,” she informs him and Seungcheol hums. “It’s been like this a lot lately.”
“I’ve been told he is getting better? That he will be okay for the coronation?” She doesn’t answer, biting her bottom lip. He doesn’t push her for an answer either, knowing how hard it must be on her. The Queen looks up again, meeting his eyes.
“Tell me, how is the Elowen family?”
He leans against one of the dressers on the side to be more comfortable, “They all seem nice,” he says simply and she rolls her eyes.
“Your future Queen. How is she?” There is a hopeful smile on her face as she speaks and it hits him more than anything today.
“She’s smart,” he assures her. “Pretty, and she loves our gardens.”
“Then your mother would have approved of her,” she nods. It’s rather rare that people in the kingdom talk about his mother. A lot of the things he’d heard throughout his childhood weren’t painting her in the best light, but Kyong has never spoken ill of her. She always did her best so Cheol could meet her through her stories, since he didn’t have the chance to do so before she died.
“It’s a political marriage, don’t think too much into it,” he shakes his head.
“There are different levels to a political marriage, Seungcheol. Not all of them have to stay strictly professional.”
“I hope love will be in the cards for your son,” he answers simply with a smile as genuine as it can be.
“It is in your cards as much as it is in your siblings,” she assures him. “You are deserving of love, as much as anyone else is.” It’s his turn to stay quiet, unsure what to say to that. It’d be nice if that was true but honestly, it’s hard to believe when he thinks about the situation he is in.
“Look at your father,” she glances at the sleeping man, finally taking the trail of food from the bed. “He always thought the same, that he was meant for politics and was doomed to live through his people only. Now, look at us.”
“You are the exception, not the rule,” he reminds her but she simply shrugs, slowly digging into her food.
“Darling, you could easily make it into a rule.”
The words ring in his ears as he watches her eat, thinking about what she said. Deep down, he wishes he could be that lucky, that he could find someone to love, but he just can’t see it. Not now at least. Right now, he’ll be happy if he makes sure the Queen will eat her food well and stay with them for many more years, even if his father doesn’t stand by her side anymore.
Time seems to pass by faster than you can comprehend. It feels like you only blinked once and everything around changed. The palace is a mess, people coming in and out before you can properly learn their names, lords who don’t know why you’re here in the first place trying their chances to see if they could find their future wife, and all the servants panicking that nothing will be ready on time. Coronation is in two days.
One would think everything would be in place by now, all perfect for the future King of Veloria, but it’s far from it. If the palace is one thing, it’s disorganized. You had to learn that the hard way. You know you can’t blame Seungcheol, not when he’s barely gotten a taste of ruling yet. And not when you haven’t even gotten a chance to speak with him since the dinner with your families passed.
You understand that he is busy, deep down you know it has nothing to do with you, but you wish you could see your future husband more.
You’ve met once in the last two weeks. It had been over breakfast, when your father asked him to join your family so they could discuss the plans for forthcoming events together. You only managed to exchange two words with him before your mother took you and your siblings outside so the men could decide over your future. You can’t say you’d be surprised. It’s been like this your entire life. If anything, you’re pleased they let you finish eating before having you leave.
In a way, it’s nice not having to worry about anything. You spent the last two weeks in the gardens, accompanied by Taehyun or Mingyu. Unlike Taehyun, Mingyu fell into a comfortable rhythm with you much quicker. While Taehyun has always wanted to keep boundaries, making sure he wouldn't overstep, Mingyu had engaged in a chat with you as soon as you met him.
You later learned it was because he doesn’t have many worries about losing his position. His family has been working for the royal family for centuries, and it turns out, he and your future husband are quite close. Ever since you found out, you had to bite back your tongue not to ask him about Prince Seungcheol. About how he really is like outside of all the duties, without the (soon not so much) imaginary crown on his head, about his hobbies and biggest dreams.
You doubt he’d even tell you if you did ask.
Mingyu isn’t the only friend you’ve made during your stay, though. You’ve met plenty of interesting people like the royal teacher, a few of Veloria’s best scholars, and incredible ladies-in-waiting that had sworn to you their honesty and pure heart — even though you’re unsure if it wasn’t all for them to get closer to the Prince. You heard about ladies-in-waiting that had later become the King’s company back home, but you never wanted to believe it to be true. Why marry if you want to keep meeting new women?
But the most interesting of them weren’t the ladies or lords, it was the young gardener you found yourself spending every day with. You’ve seen the look on Taehyun’s face when you first got into a chat with Soobin, but it wasn’t like that. You’d be foolish to look at the gardener as anything more than a friend who shares the same interest in flowers as you. Especially when you already have a Prince courting you.
“Have you heard of the new flower the Amberielle kingdom has in their gardens?” You ask, watching as he waters the lilies around you.
“I have not, Your Highness,” he admits, barely sparing you a glance. Every morning, when he sees you coming down to the gardens, he feels like throwing up.
Not because your presence might bother him, in fact he is well aware he should be grateful for a Princess sharing her free time with him, but the look your guards give him every time he chats with you scares him. As aware as he is of his luck, he is also aware how easy it’d be for the King to get him killed if he does something he doesn’t like. And Soobin would be a fool to let his head be cut off for something he never meant to do.
“Really? I’ve read about it in the books Taehyun brought for me from the library,” you look at the guard beside you, giving him one of your thankful smiles. His lips don’t even twitch though, making you scoff. You thought he might have cracked after all this time but it seems like you’re still where you were when you first arrived.
“I see,” Soobin mumbles, locking eyes with the guard before looking down at the ground again. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to go take care of… things,” he blurts out and you frown, sensing the lie on his lips. It’s weird. Some days, he has no problem spending all afternoon talking to you about the gardens or hobbies, and then others he shuts down like this, refusing to talk to you about anything. You want to ask him about it, question his behavior, but before you can do so, he is off, leaving you alone with Taehyun.
You sigh, turning to face the guard. “What shall we do then?” He opens his mouth to answer — probably to tell you to go back to your chambers and not step a foot out, you assume — but before he can do so, another guard interrupts him.
“Your Highness, His Royal Highness is looking to speak to you.”
You recognize Mingyu’s voice, taking a step to the side so you can see both of them. You narrow your eyes as you watch him, blinking a few times before nodding, telling him to lead the way. You haven’t spoken to him in days and now he wishes to bless you with his presence? You don’t see a reason why. But then again, coronation is in two days. And you are to be the Queen of Veloria.
Mingyu doesn’t tell you what it’s about as he leads you through the chambers to the crown room, Taehyun right behind you. You walk in silence, silence that you don’t like. It makes you feel weird, like you are in some sort of trouble. It makes you feel like a little girl all over again, walking the path of shame as the guards lead you to your parents to humiliate you and complain how irresponsible you are.
The memory makes you straighten your back, reminding yourself of everything your teacher taught you, remembering all the lessons you took so you wouldn’t feel like that little girl again. You’re a grown woman now, you tell yourself as you look ahead.
“Thank you, Mingyu,” Seungcheol smiles at the guard before looking your way. He sits on the King’s throne, confidence shining right through him. His hair is neat and so are his clothes. When you look at him, he truly looks like a King. “You can leave. I’d like to talk to the Princess alone.” Despite keeping his smile on and his calm demeanor, it’s a command, his voice ringing in your ears as the two guards leave, followed by another two guards who were looking after the Prince until now.
“You wanted to see me?”
He nods, standing up from the throne and walking over to the large window in the room. You tilt your head confusedly before deciding to join his side, standing awkwardly beside him and looking down at the people. “I’ve heard you’ve been in our gardens more often.”
“Oh,” you snap out of your thoughts and glance up at him. “I have,” you agree. “As you know, I find them beautiful. The flowers calm my mind.”
“Are you sure it’s the flowers that calm your mind?” He asks, turning his head towards you. The moment your eyes lock, you feel something hit you. A wave, spark maybe. You’re not sure. But you feel it, you swear you do. You stumble over your words, your cheeks heating up as you gaze into his eyes.
“Uhm— Excuse me?”
He sighs, breaking eye contact again and looking out towards the gardens. “I’ve also heard you’ve been talking to the gardener,” he admits. “Soobin?”
Now you’re even more confused. What does he have to do with anything? “Are you accusing me of something, my Prince?”
He doesn’t answer immediately, avoiding your eyes. You eye him confusedly, frowning. This is definitely not a topic of conversation your parents or teacher would approve of, but what are you supposed to do when he started it?
“I mean it’s understandable,” he clears his throat. What is? He makes no sense to you. “It makes sense to look for another in your position, I know that, but my lady,” he faces you again, his eyes stern. “You need to be careful with things like these. It’d be a great betrayal to both of our kingdoms if anyone saw you two together. Not to mention that due to his rank, it’d do him no favor. We would have to call off the wedding and it’d be especially hard for your father to arrange another one for you.”
“I don’t–” you shake your head. “What are you talking about, Prince?” He tilts his head, trying to read you with his eyes.
“What I’m meaning to say, you shall not be seen with him in public.”
“Why shall I not?” You push further, trying to make sense of this conversation. It’s confusing, Prince Seungcheol is confusing. It feels like he is talking in riddles, making you guess every word of his. And so far, you’re in no luck at solving the code.
“Have you not heard a word I just said?”
“I have, my Prince. I simply don’t understand.”
You’re not entirely sure if he is annoyed or confused as he takes the sight of you in. You can tell that he is thinking about something, going over what he is going to say next in his head. You tilt your head to the side, looking up at him. “Soobin, the gardener, aren’t you sharing a bed with him?”
Your eyes widen, realization from what he is accusing you of hitting you. You stumble back, your ears red from embarrassment and anger. How could he think so little of you? You’re a noble woman, a Princess, raised by the best teachers in the Elowen kingdom. How dare he even think you weren’t taught what even just being alone with a man would do to your reputation. And share a bed with someone you’re not married to? Heaven forbid.
Your name slips past his lips without any titles and you just shake your head, stepping away from the window. “It was nice chatting with you, Your Royal Highness, but I shall get back to my chamber. My ladies-in-waiting are waiting for me so we can have our afternoon tea.”
You try to leave the room but as soon as you open the large door Seungcheol’s hand wraps around your wrist, stopping you from leaving. You swallow hard, trying to pay as little attention to it as possible. You lock eyes with Taehyun and he shifts uncomfortably, his eyes flickering between you and the Prince. You don’t even want to know what he is thinking, worried he’d accuse you of the same thing the Prince did. How could you be so foolish? You know what rumors like this could do to you and your family.
“Give us another moment, we aren’t done talking yet,” Seungcheol says towards the guards, his eyes softening when he looks at you again, begging you to stay. You avert your eyes from him, thinking about all your options. You need to take care of this problem, and you need to do it fast. Daniela will know what to do. You need to go see her.
“I think we are done,” you argue but he doesn’t let go of your hand.
“Just two more minutes, Princess.” You bite back everything you wanted to say next. You are a weak, weak girl, you realize.
“I no longer shall be talking with you alone,” you say instead, doing the next best thing you can think of. He hesitates, finally dropping his hand to his side.
“Of course,” he mumbles. “Mingyu, may you?”
You find yourself behind closed doors again, this time not only with Seungcheol but his friend as well. You’d prefer it a lot more if the door stayed open but you know you’d be asking for too much then. Thankfully, you can blame this conversation on discussing important political matters not even the guards can hear of if anyone asks you why you were alone with the Prince.
“Your Highness?” You question awkwardly, looking at your feet.
“I didn’t mean to imply,” he apologizes, stepping closer to you. You let him, for now. “I’m well aware of your status, and what those accusations mean to you. I just—” he hesitates, waiting for you to look at him again. You do, doing your best to stay calm. “I just wanted to make sure you knew seeking pleasure was normal in situations like ours.”
“Pleasure?” You question, offended. “How am I supposed to find any pleasure in this, Your Highness? Pleasure in this chaos? In worries of what other people might think of me and my family? How is there any kind of pleasure in that?” You snap, deciding to forget about his title and the manners you should respect towards him.
Mingyu clears his throat but doesn’t get involved in your conversation any further, and honestly, you forget he’s even standing there. “I meant– different kind of pleasure,” he sighs, the longer he stares into your eyes the more realizing how wrong he’s got this. You watch the embarrassment settle on his face, but you’re certain it’s not as bad as the one you feel. “Forget it,” he blurts out. “I didn’t realize you don’t—”
“I don’t, what?”
“Understand.”
Your frown deepens, and for the first time since you closed the door behind you you look at the guard standing a few steps behind the Prince. He is clearly avoiding your eyes, making it clear he doesn’t wish to be a part of this conversation or help you in any way.
“Then help me understand,” you say, trying not to get mad when he shakes his head. Seriously? He wants to blame you for losing your dignity and then not even explain himself?
“We shall not be talking about this,” he says almost like an apology, taking a step back again. “I’m sorry, my lady.”
You scoff, tapping your feet against the wooden floor lightly as you watch him. “Alright,” you finally speak again. “Can you at least tell me why you thought so of me? What led you to the impression?”
“I read the situation wrong,” he says instead of answering your question. You want to argue further, tell him that that’s not what you’re asking him and demand explanation, but Mingyu joins your side before you can do any of that, giving you one of his smiles, pointing towards the door with his hand.
“Shall we, Your Highness? Your ladies must be impatient waiting for you.” You hum, glancing at Seungcheol one last time before walking away with the guard.
“My Prince, you wound me.”
Seungcheol turns on his bed, frowning even in his sleep.
“You could have made it a rule.”
The image he sees isn’t to his liking. The Queen, sitting beside his dead father, holding his hand as tears run down her face. She’s devastated. But it’s not her husband’s death that puts her in such depression. It’s when she looks at him, the oldest son of the Veloria kingdom, that it all comes crashing down — the disappointment, the anger, the regret.
No. He can’t bear seeing her like that. If she feels disappointed in him as well, then what is he supposed to do? He can’t rule, he can’t lead his people. He’ll only make them miserable. As miserable as he’s made the Queen. Bad things have always followed him, how else is he supposed to explain his mother dying during birth? It was always his fault, and he was now going to lead his people into failure as well.
He turns around on his bed again, trying to chase the image away. The last thing he should be thinking about is how big of a failure he is the night of his coronation. But the picture isn’t any better on the other side.
He dreams of you, in the same pink dress you wore to the dinner with your parents. You look crushed, your eyes watery as you look up at him, hiding an incredible amount of pain behind them. It hits him harder than he thought it could, his eyes widening as he quickly tries to cup your cheeks and brush your tears away. But he can’t. His hands go right through you. He can’t hold you. He can’t help. All he can do is watch you suffer because of him, watch you cry and yell at him, regret ever meeting him.
“I thought we could have an understanding, my Prince.”
It’s not truly you talking to him, it’s his own conscience, he knows that — or maybe he just hopes that’s the case — but it doesn’t change the fact your words hit him hard. It feels like you just pulled his heart out of his chest and twisted it between your fingers. He opens his mouth to assure you it will be okay, that he can make this okay again, but no words come out.
His eyes snap open, his breathing heavy as he stares at the dark wall in front of him. A dream, he reminds himself. That’s all this was. He closes his eyes again, hiding his face in his hands with a groan. Taking a deep breath, he drops his hands down, stepping out from under his blanket.
It’s still dark outside but he doesn’t feel like going back to sleep anytime soon. Taking down his pajama pants, he changes into his outdoor garments, leaving his room before anyone can notice. It’s not like he wouldn’t be able to leave whenever he wants, but he is sure any good servant would report it to the first guard they’d find and they would insist on staying with him. And honestly, he doesn’t feel like sharing the place with anyone else at the moment.
For the first time in what feels like ages, it’s quiet as he walks through the palace. The night sky is filled with stars shining above his head, his steps light as he walks through the gardens, taking his time with taking in the sight until he finally reaches his destination — the same place he first met you.
He stares ahead, unsure why he came here in the first place. It’s not like his dreams mean anything, and this place definitely doesn’t either. Yet, he can’t seem to move and walk away now that he is here. He turns around, enjoying the peace as looking at his surroundings. He can see your chamber from here, he realizes. It’s dark in your room, as it should be this early in the morning. The only light in the palace is coming from the kitchen, everyone busy preparing for the coronation, he assumes.
The coronation.
He should get back to his room, sleep as much as he can before the maid comes to wake him up, and pray everything goes well today. He still hesitates, his eyes glued to your window. It’s hard to hide his worries but he does his best, burying the memory of his dream deep inside. For now, that should be enough. How he’ll react when he sees you again later today is a different story, though.
♡⸝⸝
Despite the earlier panic all throughout the palace, everything is ready and set on time. Seungcheol smiles as he greets lords and ladies, engaging in a small talk with them. The walls are lined with guards everywhere, all of them focused on their job and nothing else. Which is likely also why he didn’t have a chance to speak with Mingyu yet. He was hoping for some reassurance from his best friend before it all comes crashing down, but for now, Joshua’s words will have to do.
“Look at you,” Kyong’s voice interrupts him, his eyes softening as he apologizes to lord Kim before glancing at the Queen. “You look beautiful,” she tells him, her hand wrapping around his biceps, giving a reassuring squeeze.
“I could say the same about you,” he takes in the sight of her, her dress deep purple and her hair falling in soft waves. This is the Queen he remembers raising him. The woman who stood by him and showed him manners as well as fun.
He feels proud. He is well aware how foolish that might sound. He is the one gaining power over the kingdom, it is his day, and yet, it’s not himself he is proud of. It’s the woman who has pulled through her spouse’s illness so she could be present for his big day.
“Father is coming in,” Joshua jumps into the conversation, fixing his uniform. He wears the same navy blue as the crown Prince, minus all the gold that lines him. Seungcheol clears his throat, nodding.
“I should go then, wait for the council to welcome everyone so we can begin.” They both nod to him and Joshua offers his arm to the Queen, walking with her to their designated place.
Seungcheol watches as the Queen takes a seat on her own throne besides the King, her smile wide but her eyes bearing the pain she’s hiding all day. The ceremonial robe the council made him wear looks heavy on him, and every part of the Prince worries if his father will be okay. It’s only once he sees him hold the Queen’s hand in his, looking at her like it’ll all be okay, that he leaves the throne room.
The noises all calm down and he is certain he’ll hear every one of his steps when he comes back to the room. It’s weird, standing here, with everyone even slightly important waiting for him inside so they could watch the King put a crown on his head. A lot of Princes his age have been married off for years, but it feels too soon for him.
Trumpets ring through his ears and before he can properly prepare himself, the door opens in front of him, a guard on each side. He takes a deep breath, straightening his back as he walks through the empty aisle his people created for him. He keeps his eyes laser focused on his father, not trusting himself enough to look at his siblings.
He kneels in front of the King, his head down. He recognizes Kaito’s voice as he recites a few words on the side where everyone can see him. Seungcheol doesn’t look, though. He barely even registers his words, everything that’s said until his father starts speaking a blur.
He glances up, just for a moment to make sure he is okay before his eyes burn holes into the ground beneath him again. The King clears his throat before reciting an Oath, encouraging the crown Prince to look ahead. He does, meeting eyes with his father as he repeats his words. A few people whisper behind him but he can’t hear anything, anxiety creeping up his back that he might mess up or something might go wrong at the last minute. It’s almost as if he had some sort of a protection device on his head, everything tuned out. His ears buzz which is not amazing but he pushes through, watching the King raise from his seat.
“Today, in the name of the crown, it is a great honor to proclaim my son, Seungcheol, a rightful heir to the throne. May strength follow your every step, wisdom guide you through the rough times of a war, and mercy lead your people. Rule in times of sickness, rule in the honor of the great Kings who carried this crown before you.” He steps down from his throne, slow, controlled steps like the Doctor advised him before.
The golden crown is heavy on his head but it doesn’t stop him from rising up, towering over his father as he walks up, taking his rightful place on the throne. It’s only then that he properly looks into the crowd. Mingyu stands on the very right, a proud grin on his face unlike the other guards who keep a stern face. It makes him smile as well, the realization of how much this means finally settling in.
Lord Choi stands on the left side, close to the royal family, a pretty lady on his arm. It makes him think of you, of you in his dream, of your pretty eyes and lips he’s thought about more times throughout the day than he’d like to admit. He scans the room once more until his eyes finally land on your figure, standing at the front with your family, a smile on your face as you bow down along with the rest of his people. His people.
Your pastel purple dress shines in the room. It might not be to everyone else, but it does to him. He isn’t sure why, why your presence in the midst of strangers feels like a soft light that peeks through the blinds in the morning, or why he sees your smile even as he closes his eyes, but it matters to him.
“Long live the King!” Someone in the crowd yells, making his serious demeanor crack, a laugh escaping his lips.
“Please,” he interrupts before the crowd can start celebrating, his eyes meeting Mingyu’s from across the room, a quiet thank you in his smile as it is his voice he recognized. “Before celebrations begin and all our doors open for you, I’d like to make a statement.”
As if the atmosphere wasn’t serious enough until now, everyone quiets down, nervously glancing around. He sees you do the same, trying to ask your father what’s going on. “My father was a great leader, one that got us through important battles and made sure his people would be taken care of,” Seungcheol looks at him, noticing his struggle as he tries to hold a cough in. Alright, quicker it is.
“It wasn’t just his work, though, which is also why I’d like to thank William,” he turns to the Head Advisor standing beside the throne. William smiles at the people, awkward as he has no idea what the new King of Veloria plans to say. “You did an amazing job helping my father. And I, as your King, grant you the honor of retirement.” He watches as his eyes widen, panic rushing through his entire face. “Instead,” he looks at the crowd below him again. “I’d like to name a new Head Advisor for the crown. Seungkwan, could you take William’s place?”
Whispers run through the room, filling his ears as he watches the scholar nervously step in front of him, a quiet thank you on his lips before he joins William’s side. “I trust his judgment to the fullest. And I can assure you, our kingdom will only grow with us.” It’s only then that he decides to step down, his shoulders tense as he joins the lords and ladies below. It creates a smile on Seungcheol’s face. Finally, finally, he’s got him right where he’s wanted him for what feels like ages — under him, with no power to rule over him.
He looks to his side, taking in the approving smiles of his brothers before everyone cheers, the room much louder than before. The throne room slowly clears out, everyone rushing to get to the great hall where the banquet for celebrations is hosted. Seungcheol stays in place, watching others leave before he allows a heavy sign to leave his lips.
It’s also then that his father grabs onto the first thing he can — which happens to be Chan’s arm as he rushes to help him — the coughs he kept in this entire time finally leaving his lips. “Let’s get you back to bed,” the former Queen coos, trying to remain calm.
“Will you be at the banquet?” her daughter asks, hope in her voice. It hurts, seeing the most important people in his life this low. He can read his sister perfectly, the way she misses her mother and simply wishes to spend some time with her. But he can read Kyong just as well, all the pain she bears, the tears she hides from her children in order not to worry them.
“We’ll see, darling,” she smiles, unable to tell her no right away. Seungcheol sees right through it but doesn’t say anything, calling Mingyu over instead to help them get back to their chamber without anyone noticing.
“Will he be okay?” His sister asks as they leave the room, looking up at her three older brothers. Seungcheol meets her eyes, his heart breaking in pieces. He’s never wanted anything other than happiness for her. He’d fight for her to get anything she wants, just a word and he’d do it. But what he cannot do for her is lie, look her in the eyes and promise her it will all go back to how it was, with everyone healthy and smiley.
Learning about his father’s illness hasn’t fully hit him until today. It all seemed like something impossible. How could his father, the same man who was always the strongest leader he knew, fail the bottle with sickness?
“The Doctors’ got him,” Joshua assures her when no one speaks, squeezing her shoulder. She smiles up at him, placing her hand on top of his. She believes him, of course she does. Why wouldn’t she believe it when her big brother tells her it will be okay? Seungcheol closes his eyes, unable to watch it any longer. Taking a deep breath, he turns around to the guards left near the walls.
“Can someone accompany my sister to the banquet?”
Two guards step forward without saying anything and the King nods, motioning for them to walk out with her. “You’ll all attend though, right? I won’t be there alone?”
“It’s to celebrate my coronation, you seriously think I could miss it?” Seungcheol turns to her again with a smile. She nods, visibly less tense now. The room stays quiet, all three of the Princes watching her leave the room.
Seungcheol sighs, plopping down on his throne as soon as the door closes behind her, finally relaxing. It feels like the first time he can breathe since he stepped into the room. “Are you alright?” Joshua worries, taking in the sight of his new King. It’s safe to say he looks exhausted. “Are you sure you can attend a banquet right now?”
“Do I have a choice?” It’s a rhetorical question. They all know what kinds of things would be said if he didn’t show up. He would lose his people before even gaining their trust. “Plus, not only do I need to speak with the council and entertain people, I should also speak with the Elowen family. I owe it to them after not being with them at all during their stay.”
“How’s the Princess?” Chan wonders, shifting uncomfortably in his uniform. It’s understandable, the robe they made him wear looks much heavier than what he’s used to.
“Good,” Cheol shrugs, but his mind drifts off to your standing in the crowd earlier. To your bow, to your pretty eyes focused on him as he named his new Head Advisor. He hopes you liked the ceremony. The thought makes him pause, confusing obvious on his face. His younger brothers raise their eyebrows, both of them having the same question looks on their faces. “We haven’t spoken much. But as we all know, she’ll be a great addition to the kingdom,” he assures them, the same words he said days prior to the council.
“Why not get to know her better?”
“We are not to be lovers,” he reminds them. But as soon as the words leave his mouth, it feels wrong. “She’s a political addition to the kingdom,” he continues, quickly pushing aside all the thoughts about you that appear in his head. “Unlike you two, I don’t have much of a choice.”
A hint of resentment appears behind Joshua’s eyes as the words leave his mouth but he doesn’t pay it any attention, figuring he’s just imagining things. “I don’t know, I think I’d like not having to worry if I find a wife on my own or not,” Chan comments with a shrug. “Doesn’t it make it all easier?”
Seungcheol hesitates as he looks at his brothers. “I guess it does,” he finally says, trying to read the look behind Joshua’s eyes. The longer he looks at him, the more he begins believing what he saw wasn’t just a figment of his imagination. Maybe a part of Joshua actually resents him. Which only leads him to another question — why?
“Shall we go?” Joshua brings the eldest out of his thoughts. There’s a smile on his lips as he asks, making Cheol’s eyes narrow. He doesn’t say anything though, nodding as he stands up again, following his brothers and the rest of the guards into the great hall.
“Wasn’t that beautiful?” Your mother asks as she sits in her seat. You smile immediately, the memory of Seungcheol finally getting his crown clear in your head. You feel proud, the smile you carry as genuine as it can be. You might have only spoken to him on a few occasions, but you know he is deserving of his role, despite the disagreement you had a few days ago.
“It was nice,” your father hums back.
“I think the coronation was amazing,” you proclaim, not noticing you’re interrupting your father. Thankfully, he doesn’t say anything, letting you talk freely.
“What about you, Nari? What did you think?” Your mother glances over at your younger sister.
She straightens her back as soon as all eyes are on her, clearing her throat before speaking. “The ceremony was beautiful, mother,” she nods, her politeness ringing in your ears. You wouldn’t say you were a bad student, but she’s certainly always cared more about growing into the beautiful, diligent, humble ladies you were raised to be. In a sense, you admire her for it. You’re confident she won’t have any trouble finding her future husband on her own, hopefully one who loves her dearly. “Brother and sister told me the same before the nanny took them back to our chamber,” she adds and your parents nod.
“And what did you think of the Princes? Aren’t they good looking?”
“Mama!” You whisper-yell. “Nari is seventeen.”
“Maybe it was our fault we didn’t look for a husband for you earlier. If we had, you could have been long married with children running around,” your father comments, sipping on the prepared champagne in front of him.
You open your mouth to argue, tell them it wasn’t a mistake that they waited until you were twenty five as you still had a lot of developing to do and things to wrap your head around, but before you can say any of it, your sister speaks again, “Looks certainly run in the Veloria family.”
“You shall ask your future husband if his brothers aren’t looking for a wife,” your mother encourages you.
“Of course,” you smile back at her, knowing you definitely won’t. You’d rather lose your parents’ trust than set up your seventeen year old sister with a man older than you.
You sit quietly after, listening to your parents talk about how pleased they are with the Veloria kingdom and the new King, reminding you how lucky you are to be chosen by him. Nari sometimes joins the conversation when asked to, but for most of it, she sits just as quietly as you.
That is, until a lord approaches your table. He bows with his right hand pressed to his heart, introducing himself as Lord Nishimura. He isn’t from around here, that much you can tell. “I hope I’m not intruding on an important conversation,” he apologizes, eyes locked onto your parents. He quickly glances at you and your sister before continuing. “I’d like to ask your daughter for a dance, if you allow.”
Narrowing your eyes, you scan his figure. He can’t be over the age of twenty, his eyes full of the same young energy you see in your eight year old brother. He extends his hand to your sister and you watch as her eyes flicker to your parents, waiting for their approval. Your mother nods with a smile and Nari’s eyes fill with excitement, placing her hand in his and leaving with him to join the other lords and ladies dancing in the center of the room.
You bite back everything you wish to say, knowing you can’t go against your parents’ methods. You’d be a fool to start a disagreement with them, especially when you are in public. You’ll just have to hope they won’t decide to go down the path of wedding their undeveloped daughter.
Your mother clears her throat after sharing a glance with her husband, causing you to look at her. “Don’t you feel like dancing tonight, darling? It’s a big day for us just as much as for the Veloria family after all,” she mentions and you know exactly where she’d be heading with it.
“You’re right,” you agree, forcing a smile. “I shall join the others.”
Your parents watch you with a smile as you leave the table but you know it’s as forced as your own. It makes you feel weird, something in your stomach makes you uneasy. You always loved your parents and believed the relationship you had with them was strong, but ever since you learned they arranged a marriage for you, it was as if it all shifted. All of a sudden, your afternoon tea conversations with your mother weren’t about the books you got your hands on lately or your interests but about preparations for the wedding and questions about your future husband.
Frankly, it all made you feel small, like you were stuck between four walls with no doors or windows. It began to be harder to breathe freely around them, everything crashing down on you. The bond you thought you always had with your mother was weakening with each day spent together, and you found yourself in the Veloria gardens more than not.
It was easy to escape from everything and focus on the nice things. You don’t have the heart to face the fact that your and your mother’s relationship might not be as great as you thought it was, if you’re honest.
You decide to stay near one of the tables, this one decorated with a chocolate fountain and all kinds of fruits you could think of. Most of the nobles are dancing in the center or chatting at their respective tables, keeping your surroundings quiet. Which is exactly what you needed, a quiet peace of mind to let you forget about your parents and their meddling.
Scanning the room, a part of you feels disappointed when you can’t find a certain King who you’ve been wanting to talk to ever since leaving the throne room two days ago. You understand he has other things to take care of before joining the banquet but that doesn’t stop you from wondering when he’ll turn up. He is your future husband after all, you can wonder about his whereabouts.
Your mind drifts to your conversation two days ago, to the memory of his dark eyes gazing into yours. Biting the inside of your cheek, you do your best not to think about the possibilities of where he might be, what he might be doing. If the roles were reversed, and you’d be the one who still hasn’t shown, the rumors would start before you could blink.
Being a woman is lovely, and with every inch of your body, you appreciate everything you have, but the difference between women and men in this society is far too obvious. You watched your youngest sister’s interest in weaponry fade away as she was pushed into afternoon tea she never liked and dressing up to her age while your brother got to be taught in said area despite being only eight years old.
“My lady.” You turn to the side upon hearing a man’s voice, smiling out of politeness.
“My lord,” you drop into a small courtesy. “Have you tried the mango yet? It’s delicious,” you motion towards the fruit besides you, his eyes following yours.
“Not yet,” he shakes his head. “The fruits do look great,” he agrees before meeting your eyes again. “But I came over because someone else looks much more beautiful.”
Your cheeks catch a hint of pink as you thank him, averting your eyes to the floor beneath you. “Thank you, lord…” you pause, realizing you didn’t quite catch his name.
“Lord Song,” he finishes for you with a small bow. “My apologies for not introducing myself sooner.” You shake your head, introducing yourself as well.
“Elowen?” He questions and you watch him mentally place your kingdom on a map. “What brings you here from so far away?” You hesitate, knowing you can’t just proclaim you’re marrying the King of Veloria all of a sudden. He only became the King an hour ago, it’s too early to announce a marriage for the throne.
“What else? The beautiful coronation we watched earlier. My family came to show our support to the future King, just like everyone else in this room.”
He hums back, watching you with a smile. You feel his eyes all over you, taking in the sight of you. You do look gorgeous tonight, the maids and Daniela made sure you would, and you feel extremely thankful to them. But you’re just as thankful when you hear Lady Avanzini’s voice as she joins your side. “Your Highness, could I steal you for a moment?”
You glance between her and the lord in front of you, nodding. You drop into a small courtesy again as you excuse yourself before following Daniela away. “Where are we heading?” You ask, taking your chance and looking around the room for the King.
“You looked like you needed some saving, my lady,” she says simply, making a soft laugh bubble out of you as you shake your head at her.
“Our conversation wasn’t as bad as it might have looked like.”
She stops in her tracks, turning around to face you. “Would you have rather I left you alone?” Your eyes soften as you shake your head again in a silent no. She smiles, “see, Princess? I know what you need at all times.” She looks proud of herself as she leads you into another quiet corner of the room, staying by your side and watching the banquet unfold.
“Have you happened to see the King?” You whisper towards her without taking your eyes from the nobles dancing, hoping that by some miracle you might find him in the midst of them.
“I did,” she nods. “He was speaking with a few gentlemen at their table. His brother was with him.” The mention of the younger Prince brings back memories of your earlier conversation with your parents, a heavy sigh leaving your lips.
“Don’t remind me of any of the Princes. My mother is hoping one of them might be interested in our Nari,” you tell her, voice low enough for only her to hear. Her eyes widen and she turns to you, looking for any sign of it being a joke. When she doesn’t find any, she laughs either way.
“I saw the youngest Prince eyeing at least five different ladies already, and the second born is nowhere to be found. I think we both know what that means.”
You tilt your head to the side, blinking confusedly. What does that mean? “A lady?” Your eyes widen, realization settling in. Of course. You were worried about the King seeing another woman just moments earlier when you couldn’t find him but it didn’t even occur to you his brothers could be doing the same. But why hide his relationship when there isn’t a different lady waiting to marry him?
Maybe you’re too used to the love stories you read about. It seems easy to you. He’s a Prince, he could have anyone in the country he wishes to, so why not just ask the King for a blessing to a marriage?
“Oh how I wish I could sneak away from this ball with someone as well,” Daniela sighs, bringing you out of your thoughts.
“Why?”
“Because, my lady, I’m dying to feel a man’s hands on me.” Your eyes widen as the words reach your ears, panic rushing through you. You quickly look around to make sure no one else heard her, that no one could spread something so scandalous about your closest friend. “What?” She laughs, as if she couldn’t understand your worries. She should have, she should know just how much it means for a woman to say or do something that could ruin her reputation. “Don’t tell me you can’t relate, Princess.”
You quickly shake your head, refusing anything even slightly close to what she’s implying. “I have not, and shall never, agree to anything this incriminating.” You watch as something flickers behind her eyes, understanding maybe. You’re not quite sure, frankly.
With a simple smile, she straightens her back again and looks into the crowd, leaving you to think about the interaction on your own. “Look, His Majesty is…in the middle of the crowd of ladies there,” she points out and you take a second to even register what she said before following her eyes.
Finally, after what feels like forever, you see the man you’ve been looking for for so long. Only, he happens to be surrounded by ladies from all around and their mothers, chatting. You can only assume it has something to do with the fact Veloria now has a single King, who by all the rules you both grew up with, should be looking for a wife to consume an heir for him. If it wasn’t for your already existing arrangement, you’re certain your mother would be standing in the crowd as well, trying to list all the good qualities you have.
There's a smile on his face as he speaks, and you can't figure out if it's simply a politeness or if he's enjoying himself. Despite knowing how selfish it sounds, you hope it's simply politeness. You wish you could look at him and not feel any sign of anxiety and sadness when you see him like this, but the truth is, you ended up caring about him more than you thought would coming here. And with every one of the glances you share together, you feel your heart aching.
He doesn't notice you, his eyes kept on the group around him. You catch the sight of Chan behind him, but he doesn't get as much attention as his older brother. You find yourself wishing they'd pay more attention to the single one of the brother's. Even though you can't say Seungcheol would be yours to claim, he don't want him exploring his opinions either.
“Anything on your mind, my lady?” Daniela teases, making you take your eyes off him. You shake your head no, but you're lying. There's a lot on your mind, and the new King of Veloria happens to be the center of every one of your thoughts. “Really? Because I think His Majesty is on his way to dance.” Your eyes snap back to him as soon as her words reach you, jealousy rushing through your veins. You know you shouldn't feel like this, you made peace with love not being in your cards a long time ago, but you can't help it. You can't help the way you feel, and when you see Seungcheol's hand hold another lady, it feels like your entire world breaks into pieces right in front of your eyes.
“I see,” you mumble, your voice barely above a whisper. “Do you know her? Who she is?”
“I'll have to disappoint you, my lady,” she apologizes. “I haven't seen her before. There is many foreign faces tonight.” You hum in response, unable to take your eyes off him. Daniela seems to notice your distress, taking your hand in hers and forcing you to avert your eyes. “Look over there, there's your little sister,” she points to the other side of the crowd, your eyes landing on a different beautiful lady this time. Nari's greed dress makes her eyes stand out, and you understand why lord Nishimura can't take his eyes away. Now that you look at them from afar, they do look nice.
But as gorgeous as your sister is, it only reminds you of the girl Seungcheol is dancing with more. She's in a beautiful pink dress, decorated with gold details, her hair is up, styled into a bun. A few brown strands line her cheeks, and without needing to look their way again, you know she has a beautiful smile as well.
A song goes by, maybe two, you're not sure. You keep your eyes on your sister, her laugh bubbling in your ears despite her being on the other side of the room. It's pleasing, seeing her have so much fun. Maybe she'll join you on other balls as well, and your only company won't be Daniela — despite the fact you love her with your whole heart — anymore.
You focus on the music and chatters around instead, slowly calming down again. You don't think about the King, the laddies dancing with him, or your earlier chat with Daniela. You just shut it all out, enjoying the moment as much as you can.
At least until you catch Lord Song approaching you again. Daniela tries stepping forward quickly, but you hold her hand, smiling as you wait for the lord to approach. There isn't any need for her to save you again. If Seungcheol can dance with other ladies while you stand in the corner and watch, why wouldn't you be able to have a little fun as well? There is no harm in a dance. And despite only thinking about Seungcheol as Lord Song asks you for a dance, you are determined to enjoy yourself.
You hold his hand, imagining it's someone else' gloved hand leading you through the crowd, someone else' deep eyes watching you as you stand opposite each other, and someone else reminding you how incredible you look tonight. You feel bad, using Lord Song so you could get your mind off your future husband dancing with different women — even though it's not working well.
“Have you heard anything worth mentioning tonight, Princess?” He asks, his eyes locked onto yours as you dance side by side, your hands facing each other but not quite touching.
“I don't pay much attention to gossip, my lord,” you answer, pushing aside the memory of Daniela's earlier words. You still can't believe she'd say something like that, in a public place on top of it all. You don't understand, no matter how much you ponder over it, you can't seem to find a reason, a meaning, for her need.
“What do you pay attention to, then?” He tilts his head slightly. It's a cute motion. And he seems genuinely interested, so you allow yourself to talk.
“There's many — flowers, literature, especially poetry,” you speak with a smile, letting yourself daydream for a while.
“What about your favorites, Princess?”
You open your mouth, ready to tell him all about your favorite flowers and books, when the dance comes to an sudden end, Lord Song stopping mid step and dropping into a bow. You blink confusedly, glancing behind you to see what startled him so much. His Majesty. Your eyes widen and you quickly drop into a courtesy, wondering what he's doing here, beside you, knowing well just a minute ago, he was still in the middle of the dance.
Despite your attempts to ignore his presence and keep your eyes on the lord dancing with you, every now and then, when you got the chance, your eyes would wander to him, checking where he is and who he is with. He was with a different lady than the one you saw him first with the last time you checked. Her dress was red, and her hair blond. You wonder which one of them he found more attractive.
“What brings you here, Your Majesty?” You dare to speak first, his eyes moving from the man next to you when he hears your voice. A chuckle tugs on his lips and it doesn't take you long to figure out it's because of the title you are using. He asked you to not be so formal with him before, but can you do that now that he is the King?
“I'd like a dance,” he states simply, pinning Lord Song down with his eyes. You feel awkward watching it, knowing every part of you hoped for this, for a dance with him tonight. You didn't think it'd be like this. That he'd interrupt your dance, making everyone around look your way to check what's happening.
“Of course,” Lord Song answers without further questions, stepping aside to create more space for the King. Before leaving completely, he takes his chance and smiles at you once more, motion which you reciprocate.
Seungcheol takes his place, his hand moving with yours as a mirror, his eyes solely on you. Your cheeks turn red as you hold his eye contact, nervousness building up as you feel your heart beating faster. You worry he might hear, that just by the look in your eyes, he'll know it all. You move in the rhythm without saying another word, too scared that if you even as breathe too loudly, he'll disappear, and it'll turn out you dreamed it all.
He steps closer to you, closer than a King should be to a lady he is simply dancing with, but not close enough for anyone to mention it. You look up at him, gazing into his chocolate brown eyes with yours. He stands out in the crowd, and it's not just because everyone's eyes are on the new King. His presence draws people in, and you know they can't get enough of his looks. You are no better than them.
“You were saying?” He asks, his face unreadable.
You tilt your head slightly before shaking it. “I didn't say anything, Your Majesty.”
“Drop the Majesty,” he stops you before explaining what he meant.
“And call you Your?” Your lips curve into a smile, proud of the joke you made. You know what he means, of course you do. But speaking to him without a title in such public place just doesn't seem right.
“You can call me yours,” he agrees, leaning closer to you so only you can hear. A shiver runs down your spine, his voice ringing in your ears.
He pulls back, an equally proud smile as you had on his lips. But you're not amused, your eyes wide and cheeks red. Everything about the situation making you feel hotter. You need to get away right after the dance, get some fresh air and hopefully a fresh mind. “Sire,” you blurt out quickly. It's supposed to be a warning for him, reminder that you are surrounded by nobles from all over the country, but your anxiety makes it seem like anything but. Seungcheol rolls his eyes, obviously not satisfied. But he leaves it, for now at least.
“Your conversation with Lord Song, what was it about?” He asks again and this time, you actually know what he wants you to talk about.
“He asked about my interests.”
“And?” He encourages, “what did you say?”
“That I love flowers, and literature,” you tell him, even though you have a feeling he already knows that. You never directly spoken to him about the things you like or what sparks your interest, however, the first time you met, you were surrounded by flowers you couldn't take your eyes off. You told him how much you loved their gardens and he must have seen you visiting them every day.
“Tell me more about it.”
“Maybe another time,” you smile, knowing the song is coming to an end. As much as you wanted to dance with him, look him in the eyes and enjoy his proximity, it all feels suffocating. You can feel multiple pairs of eyes on you, making you feel small. You wonder what they think when they look at you and the King, if they like the scene or would prefer someone else to take your place. Everyone has their own opinion on what the next Queen of Veloria should look like, what she should wear and how she should present herself. Deep down, you know it's impossible to meet everyone's standards, that one way or another you'll end up disappointing someone no matter how much you try, but it doesn't change the fact you don't like the way they are looking at you at the moment.
“Why not now?” He presses, needing to hear more from you, have another excuse not to dance with any of the other ladies looking to seek their change at becoming the Queen. “We have the whole night to ourselves.”
“I shall not stay long,” you shake your head in a small excuse. “My feet hurt and I promised my brother I'll read with him before he goes to sleep.” Seungcheol can't argue with that, nodding as if he approved. Despite knowing you don't need his approval, that you can leave whenever you want, you're glad to have it.
The song comes to an end, both of your stopping your movements and bowing. You drop into a courtesy, your legs bend much more than when you were greeting Lord Song and your head down. “We shall see each other another day, then.” You hum, not giving him a clear yes or no answer before pushing past the crowd, not bothering with finding Daniela again or saying good night to your parents, heading straight for the exit.
You don't go find your brother to read with him like you promised, you can't. Instead, you find yourself at the palace entrance, closing your eyes as you breath in the fresh air. You learned that Veloria is beautiful no matter the time of the day, but there's something captivating about the night sky and stars. The moon is clear as day from where you stand, casting soft light in the darkness of the night. The only people around are the two guards standing at the door, but they don't pay you any attention. You try to place their face to a name but no matter how you try, you don't recognize them.
However, a guard you do recognize is Taehyun, his voice pulling you out of your thoughts about how attractive King Seungcheol looks tonight. “My lady, it's cold here.” You turn around, giving him a smile. You don't need to ask why he is here, it's obvious he came to take you back to your chambers. So you simply nod, stepping forward to reach him.
You don't say anything for a while, letting him lead you through the hallways you know as well as the ones back home by now. It's only when he stops in front of your door that you hesitate, eyeing him curiously. He doesn't react, ignoring the fact your eyes are gazing into his soul. It's something he got used to since becoming your guard. “How did you find me so quickly? I didn't tell anyone where I was going.”
He looks at you, finally meeting your eyes. “His Majesty told me you were leaving the banquet, it is my job to be with you at all times and protect you. I was going to come to your chamber, but he told me I'll find you in the gardens by the lilies at the very back. It was luck I reached you before you could wander further into the dark.”
Seungcheol knew where to find you. For some reason, it makes you smile. You shake your head slightly, not saying anything back as you disappear into your room with a grin on your face. Changing into your sleeping gown, you think of the new King as you slowly fall asleep in the comfort of your bed.
The following week after coronation was filled with celebrations, alcohol, and cheers to the new Veloria King. In those seven days, Seungcheol didn't show his face on any of the events happening in his honor. Stuck in a conference room with the entire council, he had to study more than ever before. When they found him after the coronation, he thought the time they stole from the banquet would be enough to agree on everything. But turns out, all the information they dumped at him there wasn't even half of it.
It was tiring, to say the least, but thanks to the people around him, it began to feel less like a duty and more like a friendly hang out. Of course, there was still all the papers he needed to sign, letters he needed to send, and events to approve of, but knowing it no longer remains William standing by his side but is now joined with a much younger scholar who has the same opinion on many things certainly made it all worth it.
Still, there is something he hates missing out on. You.
The only time he stood by your side since the banquet was the first Sunday of his ruling, when you joined him to announce to the people you were to be the next Veloria Queen. Many cheers filled the palace shortly after, celebrations of his coronations turning into celebrations of the upcoming royal wedding. The more he thought about it, it seemed like his people will take any chance they can to celebrate something as long as it involves dancing and drinking. Not that he could blame them.
Your parents left the kingdom shortly after, leaving you alone in here. Maybe that's why he hates being busy even more, knowing you have no one else here to hang out with. Sure, your ladies-in-waiting are here to accompany you, and from what he heard, Lady Avanzini stayed, but that's different. He is to be your family, your husband, he should be able to spend time with you as well.
Instead, all he can do is watch your from the palace as you walk through the gardens, just like you have many times before. Taehyun follows you on every step, and he's never been more grateful for the knight's devotion to the royal family. Knowing you always have someone by your side to look out for you when he can't helps him ease his mind.
He's noticed you spending more and more time outside, seeking the comfort of the gardens more than before. Every part of his body wants to come down and join you, ask you what's on your mind and if he can help anyhow, but each time he is close to leaving the room and chasing after you, a member of the council or Seungkwan show up, needing him for something that apparently can't wait.
It's been too long. Too long since he last got to look you in the eyes and read every emotion behind them, since he danced with you, and since he allowed himself to think about how gorgeous you look. And as much as he wants to break the cycle and see you, with each passing day, as the wedding nears, he reminds himself he'll get to see you and spend his ruling by your side for the rest of his days from now.
“Is everything ready for tomorrow?” He asks, averting his eyes from the beauty wandering through his gardens and turning to face Kaito and Seungkwan. The two of them exchange a quick glance before agreeing.
“Everything should be set. We have every flower the Princess requested, most of our guests have confirmed their attendance, and the servants are preparing the room as we speak,” Kaito proclaims, making the King hum. “We've got everything under control, so you can just relax for the night and spend your last day before the wedding however you wish,” there is a slight implication behind those words but Seungcheol decides to ignore them, focusing on the important part — he can relax tonight.
There is many things he could do, sleep the entire night, visit his father and see if his condition got any better — despite knowing it hadn't, and it's only a matter of time before he leaves them for good — but the first thought that comes to mind is he could spend time with you. He could join you on your walks, take you from your ladies and have dinner with you, or simply replace Taehyun and follow you like a lost puppy for the rest of the day. Neither of the options sound bad.
“Your brother asked me to tell you to meet him in front of the palace in…” Seungkwan's eyes trail to the sun outside, guessing the hour by the shadow it sets. “In about an hour, Your Majesty.” And there go his plans of spending time with you. A sigh escapes his lips, wondering which one of his brothers just got on his bad side. “Or I could tell Prince you are busy?” He asks upon seeing the look on King's face.
Seungcheol shakes his head, coming to peace with the face he'll have to wait one more day to spend time with you. “No need. I'll meet him. Has he said why he wants to see me?” Seungkwan apologizes, nervous as he tells his king he hasn't asked as far. Kaito gives him a dirty glance, almost as if he was judging him for his lack of knowledge, but truthfully, Seungcheol doesn't care.
♡⸝⸝
“We are going out together,” Joshua announces with a grin, Mingyu right beside him. Now as he stands face to face with his brother, he hates not yelling at Seungkwan before for not knowing why his brother wanted to see him. Had he knew it was just about going out, he would have never came down here. “Oh come on, don't get all you now.”
“What does that mean?” He narrows his eyes, his brows furrowing together.
“That,” Joshua says simply. “That face, the sulkiness. You can't be mad we want to take you out on your last night as a single lord.”
“Not a lord.”
“Same thing,” Mingyu brushes him off. “You can let go of your responsibilities for the night, so take the chance. Let's go out and have fun. Last night before everything becomes heir, wife, duties, hm?” The two of them stare at each other for a second before Seungcheol finally sighs, agreeing. The two younger men silently cheer, grinning at each other as if they just got the greatest news of their life delivered on silver plate. He shakes his head at them, finding them ridiculous.
“I need to change then,” he mumbles, looking down at his clothes. It's too royally. If they are going out, joining the common, far from the responsibilities and duties he holds, he should dress accordingly. “Put on something…less.” Mingyu laughs at him, telling him to hurry.
He does, almost stumbling over his own feet and knocking down half of his wardrobe as he changes into a simple shirt and a dark vest, something much more casual than the clothes he's forced to wear to the council meetings. He passes by your lady-in-waiting on his way outside again, sharing a brief smile with her. He can only hope she is on her way to see you, and spend some time with you while he can't.
It scares him how much he wishes he could.
The pub is filled with laughter that fills his ears right after stepping inside, everyone holding a glass of beer. A few people in the corner yell at the entire place, and it takes him a second to realize they're singing. It's completely different from the events and celebrations he is used to, but if he's honest, the atmosphere in this place is much more to his liking. Everything feels a lot more casual, no one caring if they leave a good impression or what others think about them.
It's filled with men, which is another thing he isn't used to. The lack of femininity could turn a lot different ways. “Don't just stand here,” Mingyu pats him on the back as he walks past him, saying his greetings to the guy behind a bar. They laugh at something Mingyu says, the two of them obviously friends. Seungcheol hesitates for a second before following Joshua to one of the tables, taking in the sight of everyone once more as he sits down. No one is paying attention to him, everyone busy with their conversations to notice him. And frankly, he loves that.
In the palace, everyone's eyes are on him at all times, giving him little to no privacy. But here, it looks like as if no one knows who he is. Mingyu comes back with three beers, setting them down on the table and spilling some of it out. No one points it out, all three of them raising their glasses and clinking them together on top of the table. “To our King,” Mingyu grins, his teeth showing.
“To the Queen,” Joshua adds with a smile.
“To our kingdom,” Seungcheol finishes, bringing the glass to his lips and gulping down the bitter liquid.
The three of them chat away about the past few weeks, and Mingyu answers every question about you and your safety Seungcheol throws his way. Joshua watches it in awe, slowly piecing one and one together. But it'd have to take a lot more for the King to admit how much space you take of his mind, brushing Joshua off every time he tries to tease him about how smitten he apparently is with you. He wouldn't say he is smitten or anything, he is simply worried about the well-being of the woman supposed to rule the kingdom by his side. Nothing weird about that, right?
He's only halfway through his second beer of the night when a conversation catches his ears, his eyes focused on whatever Mingyu and Joshua are talking about while his true attention rests on a table a few feet away.
“The coronation was so weird,” one of the guys says, alcohol reeking even from the tone of his voice. It makes Seungcheol frown, glad he isn't the one sitting opposite him, smelling the drinks he had tonight. He shakes his head, redirecting his focus back on his two close friends. He knows people have different opinions on the coronation, the process and reasoning behind it. And honestly, he doesn't really care. As long as his closest enjoyed it, there is no need for him to dwell on it. But their conversation continues, taking a much more interesting turn.
“I mean, it was fast, out of nowhere, right. But you know what was weirder — the wedding announcement. Don't you think that was extremely fast?”
“She must be pregnant!”
“The King really didn't waste any time,” a laugh leaves his lips and Seungcheol finds himself glancing their way. There is just the two of them, both of them drunk and neither of them paying attention to their surroundings. If they had, maybe they'd notice the topic of their conversation is right beside them.
“Honestly, can't blame him for fucking her and wanting her baby. Have you seen her? I'd pay to see her bouncing on my cock,” the same guy who started the conversation laughs loudly, taking another sip of his beer. Seungcheol's eyes widen immediately, his knuckles turning white from the way he grips his glass. “We should visit the brothel after our drinks,” he suggests, nodding rapidly, obviously liking his own idea. “What do we know, maybe she works there too, with a body like that.”
His friend laughs, agreeing.
“Hey,” Cheol calls out, deciding enough is enough. The two drunks raise their heads, meeting his eyes. It takes a second for them to register who they're talking to, but he loves watching their eyes widen as realization sets in. The less of an idiot one — as Seungcheol decides to call them — opens his mouth to say something, but closes it again, knowing there really isn't anything he could say to fix this.
“What's going on?” Joshua wonders, both him and Mingyu watching their friend curiously.
Seungcheol doesn't pay them any attention, though, his eyes locked on the two idiots. “My wife,” he states, anger beaming through his voice. “Is far too busy ruling the kingdom to look your way. So if I were you, I'd shut my fucking mouth and get out of my sight before I have your heads cut for disrespect and conspiracy against the Crown.”
“We didn't—”
“Now,” he rasps, too irritated to bother even pretending to hear them out.
The two guys quickly jump from their chairs, almost tripping over their own feet and falling down as their vision blurs, their head spinning. Their glasses are still halfway full, but that's not the main subject of their worries at the moment. Neither of them looks him in the eyes again, quietly cursing each other out for not keeping their mouth shut before hurrying out of the pub, ignoring the owners call after them not to come back again.
“What was that about?” A disbelieving chuckle leaves Joshua's lips as he brings his beer to his mouth, keeping his eyes on his brother.
“I rule over brainless animals,” Seungcheol grumbles an answer before gulping down the rest of his beer at once. The bitter taste soon turns rich, the liquid sliding down his throat with ease.
“Whoa, slow down,” Mingyu shakes his head. “No need to drink your ass off because of them.”
“Didn't you two take me out so I could do exactly that?” He waves at the over to pour him another one and he nods. When he looks around the pub again, there is a lot more eyes on him, everyone whispering about what just happened. Great. Truly amazing. His annoyance only grows, and he wants nothing more than to join you in your little corner of his gardens and look with you at the flowers they have to offer.
The two share a look before looking at their King again, telling each other everything they need with their eyes. “I didn't know you care of the Princess so much,” Joshua comments casually, testing the waters.
“I don't, that's why,” he refuses, not meeting either of the guys' eyes as he waits for the owner to bring him another beer. As soon as he does, he takes another long sip, not caring what it might look like to the people around. He needs to wash his anger away and if this is how he does it, then so be it. He'll never be able to please all of his people, so what's the big deal in making a few more lose their believes in him?
Mingyu hums, not trusting him in the slightest. “You're just passionate about what the others think of you, right?”
“Something like that,” he brushes him off, refusing to discuss this further. “Now, can we focus on why we came here? Aren't we supposed to celebrate my last day before becoming a husband?”
“Right,” Joshua nods, deciding to follow his brother's lead for now. If he doesn't want to talk about it, then so be it.
If the palace was chaotic at the day of the coronation, you don't want to put a name on today. You barely got to eat breakfast in peace before Daniela and two maids on her side came rushing for you, claiming they need you immediately. You didn't question it, assuming you'll be able to finish your breakfast later after you'd be done with them, but you were dragged through the palace ever since then, everyone needing your opinion or style a part of you you didn't even know needed it.
You can't blame them, you know it's their job to make sure everything — including you — is perfect. You just wish they'd give you a time to breathe in between. You've tried all your clothes a week prior and yet, they need you to do it all over again. You need to get dressed just to take it all off again and wait for after lunch to put it back on. It's time you wish you could spend in the comfort of nature and clear your mind before the big day.
“When will this be done?” You wonder, holding in your breath as Daniela ties your corset the tightest she can. You can't breathe well but that is likely exactly what she was going for. All of your undergarments are in some sort of beige shade, making you feel bland. You know it's a wedding, and that there isn't much color you could add, but you miss your every day dress either way.
You wonder what clothes the King will be wearing. If he'll have the same royal blue you can't help but gaze at every time, if his eyes will stand out, or if they'll force him into black just so he can prove some authority. As much as you're certain black will suit him just as much, you hope he'll get to wear something else, and showcase some color for the both of you.
“Patience, Your highness,” one of the maids smiles at you, hoping to ease your mind. You sigh, looking around the room. With everything going on, you won't be surprised if they take hours until allowing you to go relax again. You'd much rather stand by and check if the place is all prepared or stay locked in the council chamber like your soon to be husband, away from all this.
“May I at least get something to drink?”
“I'll send your guard,” Daniela speaks up, trying not to pity you too much as her eyes meet yours. You nod, and before you can add anything else, a maid is calling you over, asking you to take a few steps forward on the dais. Listening, you follow their directions, watching them finish dressing you up and start fixing things. You're in for a long rest of the day.
♡⸝⸝
Standing in front of the cathedral, you feel more nervous than ever. Knowing everyone is waiting for you inside, expectations high, every part of you wishes you could turn around and run away. But you know you can't, you can't even think about what kind of trouble you'd get into if you did.
Your ladies-in-waiting went in just a few seconds ago, right after the flower girl, leaving you all alone. You never wished your parents would have stayed for the wedding more than now. You want to walk down the aisle with your father, just like you read of other ladies doing. You want to know your mother and siblings are sitting in the very front, excited to see you in your white dress. But you can't have either. The King's parents aren't here either from what you heard, but you can't imagine anyone questioning him as much as they'll question you after seeing you all alone.
God, you want to go back to your chambers.
“My lady.”
Your eyes widen, making you turn around immediately. You've never felt more grateful for hearing his voice. “What are you doing here?” You ask, eyeing Taehyun up and down. His usual uniform is switched into a ceremonial one, matching with the rest of the guards inside you can only assume. He shrugs, like it's not a big deal. “Shouldn't you be in position with the rest of the knights? What if they discipline you for disobeying orders?” You panic, despite every part of your body wanting to ask him to stay, beg him not to leave you alone.
You wonder if he'd find you pathetic if he learned what's going on through your head. You wonder if the King would, if he'd decide you're not a suitable match for him anymore because he doesn't want to rule with someone too scared of what others think of her.
“I doubt they would,” he shakes his head. He doesn't say anything for a moment, letting you relax in his presence before offering you his arm. “I'm here to walk with you. His Majesty asked me.”
“He did?”
Taehyun nods, “He thought you should walk with someone. And since I've been doing well protecting you over the past few weeks, he asked me to protect you today during the ceremony as well.”
You bite the inside of your cheek, thinking about the man waiting for you inside, the same one you've dreamed of many times before, the one who's made you nervous without even being around, the one who apparently thought through every single part of this ceremonial, even who'd walk you to him. A part of you just wants to rush inside, wrap your arms around him and thank him for everything as you let tears run down your cheeks.
Instead, you wrap your hand around your knight's arm, smiling up at him as he steps forward with you.
You walk on the red carpet beneath you, focusing forward instead of on the quiet whispers of nobles around you. You can feel their eyes on you, a lot of them with smiles on their faces, while some reek of jealousy. But there is only one pair of eyes in this room that matters to you, one pair of eyes that makes all of this easier.
You tighten your grip on the bouquet of flowers in your hands, sharing a small smile with the King waiting for you. He stands tall, intimidating, yet as welcoming as the first time you saw him in the gardens. Even from afar, his eyes stand out thanks to the navy blue gown he is wearing, lined with gold details matching yours. You can't imagine him anyhow else. This is perfect.
Keeping your eyes on him, you step on the ceremonial platform, joining his side. Taehyun quickly moves out of the way, sharing a brief smile with your lady-in-waiting before falling into space with the knights on the side. Seungcheol gives you one last reassuring smile before facing the priest. You feel your heart aching at the small motion, unsure if you want to love or hate how well he can read you.
“Dearly beloved,” You keep your eyes forward, allowing the priest your full attention. “We are gathered to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony. It is said that marriage hath in it less beauty but more of safety than the single life.”
Does it? Is marriage less beautiful than the life you were living until now? You'd hope otherwise. And as you turn to the King of Veloria, ready to exchange your vows, your hope only grows.
You briefly meet eyes with Seungcheol's brothers standing behind him before looking at him. “I, the Princess of Elowen, take thee, Choi Seungcheol, to honor our duties and fulfill our legacies. I shall honor our kingdom and our family. In sickness and in health, in times of war and peace, I promise to stand by your side.” Unable to avert your eyes, you find yourself getting lost in his orbs as you speak, the chocolate brown bringing you the same comfort you once thought only nature could provide. But ever since coming here and meeting him, you're learning a lot new things. This might just as well be one of them.
“I, the King of Veloria,” he starts, his eyes softening. You feel your cheeks turning red, everything around you becoming blurry. It's just you and him at the moment, despite the cathedral being full of nobles. He repeats your words, your name falling of his lips with so much ease and grace your head spins. “I promise to stand by your side,” he whispers, the words holding more meaning to you than he probably realizes.
“In the name of the Father, of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.” The priest brings you out of your thoughts, but before you can properly look at him, and focus on anything else other than the man beside you, he holds your hand in his, his fingertips cold against your bare skin. Your breath catches in your throat, but he is there to hold you, giving your hand a light squeeze. You nod, more of a reassurance to you than to him, and he slowly slides the diamond to your ring finger.
It's only then than you manage to avert your eyes from him, watching your connected hands. “I now pronounce you man and wife.” The priest finishes and your hand slowly falls to your side. It feels like the first time you actually register what's happening around you when you face the crowd, the soft melody played by the royal band reaching your ears.
This is it.
You shall be the Queen of Veloria now.
It is as scary as it was the first time you heard the news.
♡⸝⸝
The wedding celebrations feel a lot more like celebrations for your people than you and your husband. You haven't seen Seungcheol in hours, but that's something you've gotten used to. He is busy, it makes sense. You've had your company despite his absence, anyway. You were greeted with nobles you once read about for their great achievements, getting their blessings and praises on your looks tonight. A part of you knows they are approaching you simply to get on the King's good side but you don't mind. As long as you can focus on anything other than the fact your handsome husband is missing at the moment, you feel okay.
“Your Majesty.” You smile as you watch lord Song bow in front of you, his smile nothing if not sincere. “I didn't realize I had the pleasure of dancing with my Queen.” You allow him to kiss the back of your hand as a greeting.
“Back then, I was no Queen,” you remind him, urging him to stand straight again. You will take a moment getting used to the honor everyone pays you.
“You look beautiful tonight, Your Majesty,” he says instead of acknowledging your previous comment.
You give lord Song a bit of your time, engaging in a chat with him as he accompanies you to get you a drink. It's then that you finally catch a glimpse of your husband, his brows furrowed together and eyes tired as he dismissed his Head Advisor, obviously not in the mood to talk with him. Your smile falls as well when you see him, wishing to change directions and meet with him instead, to ask him what's bothering him and help.
You wonder if it's the first born curse, wanting to take care of other people. Because every single bone in your body itches for you to drop everything and help him.
“Mingi!” Lord Song turns around upon hearing his name, meeting eyes with his older brother. “That is my cue,” he says gently, giving you one last of his smiles. “I shall bother you no longer, Your Majesty. My sincere congratulations,” he bows with his right hand over his heart, leaving you alone. For the first time since the King's coronation when your parents left Veloria, you are happy to be on your own.
There's no hesitation as you walk past your people, offering them all your best smile. But honestly, you don't care about the impression you leave on them, you just want to get to him. “Seungcheol,” you breathe out as soon as you reach him, catching his attention immediately. He turns to face you, his eyes softening when they meet yours. Your cheeks flush at the sudden attention. You didn't think this through enough. “May I ask you for a dance?”
His hand reaches forward, palm up. “Of course,” he smiles and you hold his hand in yours. Guiding you through the nobles surrounding you, he finds the center of the hall, eyeing the people around. They don't need to be told twice, stepping back to give you the much needed space. It's just you and him, everyone else standing aside, watching you. The soft melody reaches your ears as you put your left hand on his shoulder, your right still holding his. His palm rests on your back, sending shivers down your spine. Your eyes stay locked together as you begin dancing, the world around blurring — just like it happens to do every time you allow yourself to get lost in his eyes.
“You look quite upset,” you mumble when you know no one else can hear you.
“Do I?” He blink confusedly, doing his best not to mess up his steps. “Please, don't think it has anything to do with you.” You hesitate, unsure of your place. You are the Queen of Veloria, his wife, but does he think of you highly enough to let you in, and tell you what you want to hear?
“What happened?” You ask after a brief pause.
Shaking his head, his thumb brushes slow, barely noticeable, circles on your back. “Nothing of importance,” he assures you. “I'm simply not pleased with the council wanting to keep me busy on my wedding night.”
“Will you work tonight?”
“I don't know yet,” he admits, trying to find any sign of disappointment in your eyes. He doesn't find it though, not since the only thing your eyes are filled with is the need to be closer to him than you already are.
A few nobles join you, dancing along with you, but you don't pay them attention. You don't know half of them, anyway. The song slowly comes to an end and you drop your hands to your sides despite wishing to do the opposite. “I shall find Lady Avanzini and ask her to accompany me back to my chambers, I've grown quite tired,” you excuse yourself, but before you can leave, he stops you.
“Our chambers,” he corrects you, watching you blink confusedly. “With today, our honeymoon begins. We shall share a room, for a week at least. The honeymoon,” he hesitates, biting back the words resting on his tongue. “It is a tradition. You can return to your chambers next week.” You nod, letting him know you understand.
“Then I shall see you again later,” you stop yourself from dropping into a courtesy out of habit, simply saying your goodbye with your eyes before walking away.
It doesn't take you long to find your lady-in-waiting, interrupting her chat with Taehyun. “Lady Avanzini,” you smile at her before directing your attention to your knight.
“Yes, Your Majesty?” She asks while dropping into a courtesy. This feels much more odd than you thought it would. If getting used to the respect other nobles pay you will take you a while, you can't even imagine how long before you get used to Daniela doing so. “Can I help you with anything?”
“I'd like to go back to my chambers— the King's chambers,” you correct yourself. Her smile turns into a smirk, one you could recognize from miles away. She's planning something, something you probably won't like.
“Shall I join?” Taehyun asks, glancing between you and your lady.
“Next time,” Daniela turns to him, sending him a wink. “Her Majesty won't be needing your protection tonight, I'm certain the King will take care of her well enough.”
You tilt your head confusedly but before you get a chance to ask what she means, she's leading you out of the Great Hall, finding the nearest maid to tell her she needs to bring your night gowns to the King's chambers.
“Are you excited for your honeymoon?” Daniela asks as you walk through the halls, everything quiet with everyone at the Great Hall, celebrating your marriage.
“Is there anything to be excited for?” You question, causing a soft laugh to bubble out of her.
“Of course there is, Your Majesty,” she proclaims. “Staying in bed with your husband all week, I can't imagine anything as exciting.”
“Staying in bed?”
“Yes. How else do you believe you shall spend your honeymoon? It is given for the newly weds to produce an heir and enjoy each others' company.” An heir. You are supposed to produce an heir with the King this week? In bed? Every chat you share with your lady, you question just how little you know about ruling and the duties it brings you. “I mean, I am well aware you and His Majesty didn't marry out of love, but that doesn't stop you from fulfilling your duties.”
“Of course,” you nod, even though you aren't quite sure what she means. You'll have to ask your husband when he arrives. You are sure he knows much more than you, so maybe he'll be able to help you understand.
Daniela helps you change before going back to the banquet. You take your time exploring the King's chamber, admiring his view, wardrobe, and even the washing room connected to it. Everything is double the size of your own chamber, which you understand. But as soon as your eyes land on the large bed he owns, you wish this was your room.
“Can we talk about this tomorrow?” You recognize the voice, closing the wardrobe and turning around to face the door. Seungcheol walk in right after, dropping his ceremonial coat to the floor. Your eyes widen when you see him, unsure what to do. He seems to have forgotten about you. “But, Your Majesty!” There's another male voice coming from behind the door but he decides to ignore it, shutting the door closed after himself. “A moment of relaxation is all I asked,” he mumbles under his breath, annoyed.
“Seungcheol,” you call our carefully not to scare him. He raises his head, finding your eyes in an instance. Your name slips past him lips, realization settling in as he remembers your earlier conversation.
“I apologize, I—” he curses quietly, quickly gathering his clothes from the floor and bringing them to the closet you are standing beside. “I am truly sorry for my ill manners.”
“Seungcheol,” you repeat, your voice soft, trying to get his attention back to you. “It is perfectly fine. I have three younger siblings, remember? I am used to being messy behind closed door and allowing to speak freely with my closest ones.” He gives you a smile, nodding. “That is, of course, if you don't mind me speaking so casually to you?” You question nervously. Despite his effort to get you to drop his title since your first meet, you still worry about being too forward with him.
“I am happy you do,” he assures you, closing his wardrobe and facing you again, his body only inches from yours. You feel hot, standing so close to him. He reaches forward, brushing a messy hair behind your ear before meeting your eyes again. “I haven't had the chance to tell you yet, but you looked beautiful tonight. You look beautiful every day, actually.”
Your cheeks only redden more and your eyes fall to the floor, unable to look at him at the moment. “If you give me a moment to wash up, we can go to sleep. Or talk, anything you wish.”
You nod, standing frozen in place as he walks around you to get into his wash room. “Wait,” you blurt out, facing him again. “Can I have a question now?” He nods, waiting for you to speak. “I have…” you think over your words carefully, trying to find the right thing to say. “I was told the honeymoon is supposed to be used to produce an heir.” You watch his eyes widen at your words, realization of how this conversation is going to go washing over him. “I am not sure how that works.”
“Your mother didn't teach you?” You shake your head. He keeps his eyes on you, also hesitating. He seems nervous, and it makes you wonder how you are meant to understand anything if it's so difficult to talk about. “There is enough time for us to produce an heir,” he settles on instead, deciding it is safer to run away from this conversation for now.
“Is it that difficult?”
“No, no,” he shakes his head with a sigh, taking a few steps forward to reach you again. “It isn't difficult. But I do not believe it is something you'd want me to teach you about now. We can wait.”
“Seungcheol,” you try again, your big eyes gazing into his chocolate ones. “Please. I wish to know.” He is nervous, that much you can tell from the way he looks at you, as if he is scared to break you, to harm you. It only confuses you further. Your heart beats faster because of his look, but your head tells you it's wrong, almost as if it wanted to warn you him being so secretive isn't right. “Please.”
You watch his eyes drop to your lips, the inner fight behind his eyes obvious. He can't decide whether to step closer to you, close the gap between you and give you what you want, or if he should step back, turn around and run away from you, guard himself like he thought he would do back when he first told William you are the one he wishes to marry.
“When an heir is produced,” he whispers, not wanting to break the moment. Tugging your hair behind your ear, he keeps his thumb on your cheek, his eyes flickering between yours and your lips. “You must be naked. Here,” his free hand gently brushes between your legs, barely touching, “is where it all happens.” Your breath catches, his nervousness moving onto you as you feel your body begging you to press against his, be even closer than you already are.
“You… Are you naked as well?” You whisper, knowing your voice would break if you tried speaking normally.
“I will be,” he nods. “If that's what you want.” Your body moves on its own, nodding to him. You watch his eyes flash with need, something in him snapping. He leans closer, no hesitance left as he presses his lips to yours, one of his hands still on the side of your neck while the other squeezes your waist, fingers digging into your flesh.
Your mouth moves against his on instinct, your eyes closed as you tilt your head slightly. Your entire body burns as your hands find his shoulders, holding onto him as he kisses you. You've read about this many times before, about how it feels for people to kiss their loved ones, but none of the books has been able to capture the feeling enough. You feel every one of his touches in your entire self, your head clouded with him — his smell, the way he grips your waist, the softness of his lips, and the way he presses into you.
If this is what every kiss feels like, you understand why lovers do it so often. You don't want this moment to end, you want to stay in his touch till your end.
But that's not how it works, and you have to pull back to breathe. But just as you are leaning for more, he steps back, his hands falling to his sides. Your brows furrow confusedly, confused as he averts his eyes from you. This is nothing like the kisses you have read about, you realize. Stories don't capture the feeling of your lips pressed against his well enough, just as they don't capture the feeling of your heart shattering into pieces when you are forced to watch him walk away from you right after.
“I shall go meet with Seungkwan and the council, they said it was important,” he blurts out, not meeting your eyes again as he rushes out of the room as fast as he can, not caring that his hair is messed up or that he is breaking you into pieces with this simple action.
There are many ways Seungcheol thought his honeymoon would go, but in none of the scenarios he imagine has he kissed you like you were his entire world just to run away right after in a foolish attempt to guard himself from what it means.
Love has never been in his cards, he has reminded himself of that many times since you've arrived. But every time he sees you looking up at him, your big eyes sparkling with what he could only call pure interest, he believes his words less and less. There is simply something about the way you look at him and speak to him — that has him believing, believing he could be so lucky and rule by the side of someone he loves.
Last night was the breaking point. With you in his room, in just your sleep wear and your innocent eyes asking him how you could make a child with him, it was impossible to resist you. You were always beautiful, he has never denied that, but nothing compares to how incredibly gorgeous you are with your cheeks flushed and your lips swollen.
The image of you right after he's pulled away from the kiss will stay in his head forever.
But so might the sadness in your eyes when you watched him step away.
To this hour, he isn't sure why he did what he did. He had a chance to be with you, do what everyone has been wishing him and fall in love with you, but honestly, the thought of that is scary.
He's studied the principles of politics, social manners and sword fighting. No one has taught him how to love, though. No one has ever told him how scared he'll be every day, how much he'll want to protect you and wrap his arms around you, guard you from the ugly of this world. Jumping into something like this, something he was never meant to have, is much scarier than ruling the kingdom.
He hasn't stopped thinking about you, about how much you must hate him at the moment. Not when he sat in his study with Seungkwan, not when he rested his head on the table and closed his eyes for a brief nap, or when he ate breakfast all alone, because you have gone to the gardens before anyone else could wake up.
“Your Majesty, do you wish to leave?” Kaito brings him out of his thoughts. Seungcheol blinks quickly, reminding himself where he is and that he is in no place to be daydreaming about the way your lips felt against his. “We can move this conversation to later,” he offers, well aware of the fact the King isn't paying him the attention he wishes to have.
“Please,” Seungcheol nods. “I need to go for some fresh air. We can come back to this after lunch.”
“Perfect,” he nods, hesitating before leaving. His eyes flicker between his King and the window behind him, well aware of the reason he wishes to go outside.
“If you excuse me then,” His Majesty mumbles, not meeting Kaito's eyes again as he rushes out of the study, his destination clear. There is a lot going in his head at the moment, and as much as he wants to guard himself and go through with the way he knows, the unknown calls to him just as much.
He doesn't need to look for you for long, finding you right where he thought he would, crouched down near the lilies with your hands resting over your knees, your eyes glued to the flowers in front of you. Taehyun stands a few feet away from you, close enough to be able to help if anything happened, but far enough to give you personal space.
Your name slips past his lips, making you look up at him. He watches as sadness flashes in your eyes, feeling his heart clench in his chest. He drops down beside you, hugging his knees the same way you do. “Are you okay?”
“Yes,” you lie. He can see right through you, a sigh leaving his lips as he shakes his head. “I'll be fine,” you correct yourself but it's still not an answer he'd like.
“What is it?” He asks, his voice soft. “Can I help?” You shake your head as quickly as you can, refusing. Standing up, you fix your dress and take a few steps away from him, pretending to admire the other flowers. He can tell you just want to get away from him, though. He stands up as well but respects your space, staying in place.
“I miss my family,” you mumble quietly, not sure if he can even hear you. But when he calls out your name, you know he did. He waits for you to turn around, his eyes finding yours immediately. “I know I am the Queen now and it is silly. I am well aware how this makes me look, but I can't help how I feel.” Your words hold a much deeper meaning and you both know it. There is only as much emotions you can hide from each other. “I don't like feeling alone”
“You aren't alone,” he interrupts you, carefully taking a step towards you. You don't move back, which he takes as a good sign. “You have me,” he reminds you. “I am right here.”
“Don't,” you shake your head, your lips trembling slightly — a movement so small he doubts anyone else would notice. You probably don't notice it either. Your eyes are hollow when he looks at you, like you can't decide if you feel empty or too much as you speak to him. It hurts him just as much as it hurts you. “Don't do that.”
“Do what?” The words come out a lot more desperate than he intended for them to, the silent plea in them on full display. He hopes with everything in him Taehyun isn't listening, and he can somehow keep this conversation between just you and him.
“This,” is all you say, biting your lower lip as you look at him. “Giving me home— acting like we are beyond just a partnership on a paper.”
Oh.
He'd lie if he said that didn't sting. But it is what he deserves, it is what he made you believe last night after all. But no matter how much he wants to hide from the fact, you are more than that. You are more than a stranger who came to power thanks to him. You are a dream, beautiful, brilliant, caring dream he wishes to see every time he goes to sleep.
He opens his mouth to argue, to apologize for last night and promise he never meant to hurt your feelings, but the words don't get a chance to leave his lips as Taehyun's voice rings in his ears, a quiet curse leaving his lips as he glances around to see what he needs. If it's stupid, he'll make sure to let him know just how much he doesn't appreciate his interruptions.
“You've received a letter,” he explains, holding the piece of paper in his hands. Seungcheol's eyes flicker between the knight and the boy behind him still trying to catch his breath. “What does it say?” He asks, crossing the space between him and Taehyun and taking the letter from him when he can't give him an answer.
“I was told to give you this message as quickly as possible,” the boy breathes out when Seungcheol eyes him up and down. He can't be over the age of twenty, his brown hair messy and eyes nervously snapping from one person to another, scared he might get in trouble.
Nodding to reassure him it is okay, he opens the letter, scanning the words with his eyes. “Fuck,” he blurts out before he can stop himself, his hand dropping to his side again as he turns to face you, meeting your curious eyes. He hesitates, only scaring you further as you rush to him to read the letter yourself. He doesn't allow you, hiding it behind his back, his eyes pleading for you to leave it to him.
“Seungcheol,” you demand. “What is it?”
“There is…” he stops, unsure how to say it. “Your parents were attacked. No one is hurt,” he assures you before you can panic. “Everyone is okay, and they have moved to their winter residence, but we can't know how long that will be safe for them.”
“We have to help! Who attacked them? What—” He wraps his hand around your shoulders, pulling you onto him and letting you rest your head on his chest. “You have to help, please,” you whisper, the worst case scenarios running through your mind.
“I will,” he whispers back, pressing his lips to the top of your head. He is truly a fool. A fool who thought pushing you away would somehow help him be a better ruler, a fool who can't bear seeing you upset like this. “I'll get them.”
♡⸝⸝
A letter to your parents along with a carriage and a few of the best knights Veloria has to offer was sent as soon as you made it back inside.
Seungcheol's hands rest on the back of your chair — his chair — as you sit in his study, both of you carefully listening to what the council has to say. He speaks for the both of you, not because he'd doubt your abilities but because he knows you can't do it at the moment, too busy pretending to be okay in a room full of men talking about a possible war.
“How did it even happen? It's not like their security is small.”
“It could be an insider. Someone stole the guards' attention, allowing for them to get inside.”
“They got inside?” Your eyes widen as you finally speak as well. They redirect their attention to you, a pitiful look on their faces. Cheol's hand moves from the chair to your shoulder, giving you a tight squeeze. Your body moves on its own, your hand resting on top of his, holding onto him as you steady yourself. There is only as much bad news you can bear at the moment, and he is well aware of that.
“Can someone get Lady Avanzini in here as well as Kang Taehyun?” Seungcheol speaks up, interrupting them before they can even answer. “And give us a moment alone.” The council members exchange a look before slowly stepping out, the door slamming clothes echoing through the study room. “Hey,” his voice is soft unlike when he speaks to the others, walking over to your side and kneeling beside you.
Your eyes find his and you quickly shake your head. “I'm not going anywhere with Daniela and Taehyun,” you read his mind completely, making him sigh. Holding your hand in his, his eyes plead, plead for you to do as he asks. “I'm staying here with you,” you proclaim, shaking your head again. “I don't care what your plan is, but if you want me anywhere other than the room it all happens, you will have to carry me out with your bare hands.”
He tilts his head, his eyebrows raised as if he was question your words. “You do know I could do that with ease, right?” He watches your cheeks turn pink, like they have many times before, always messing with his head. He didn't mean for it to sound like this, he's better than to flirt with you when you are scared for your parents' well being, but gosh does he wish to keep talking just to see what reactions you'll give him.
“You should get your mind off things,” he says instead, giving your hand a tight squeeze. “Sleep, and hang out with your friend. And once this is all over, you can come to your family and tell them just how much you love them.”
“I am not leaving,” you repeat, leaning closer to prove your point. If you prove anything, though, it's that Seungcheol's heart can beat way faster than he thought. “I'd much rather go with your knights to pick them up than go to sleep.”
“Our knights,” he corrects you without hesitation, making your eyes flutter slightly. “And I'd much rather know you are safe so please, don't do anything reckless. I promise I'll get your parents here safely.” He keeps his eyes on you, unable to avert his eyes. You lean back, a heavy sigh escaping your lips as you give in.
“Okay,” you nod. He sighs as well, relief washing over him. “Now, get off the floor,” you shake your head, a smile decorating your face. Seungcheol is convinced he could look at your smile for the rest of his life if you let him. Only if you'd let him. “It's not a good look for the King to be kneeling on the floor.”
“People might argue with you on that,” the words leave his lips before he can think properly about them, his eyes widening when he realizes what he said. “Forget that, you are right,” he quickly blurts out, letting go of your hand and pushing himself up on his feet.
Fixing his coat quickly, he looks ahead at the door, clearing his throat. His head clouds with thoughts he should certainly not be thinking about at the moment, the image of him on his knees in front of you making his head spin. He's in a need of some fresh air, and preferably a cold shower if he can excuse himself.
Thankfully, before he can do anything reckless, a knock on the door rings in his ears and he is greeted with Taehyun and Daniela. That was rather quick. “Your Majesty,” they both bow before stepping into the room. He gives them a brief nod, acknowledging their presence. He watches them walk forward, his eyebrow raising slightly at the sight of Taehyun's fingers brushing against hers. His eyes fall to you on their own, partly to check if you noticed as well, if you know anything, but mostly simply because something like this — a light brush of fingers in secret — makes him think of you, hope for you.
“Could you accompany Her Majesty back to her room?” Your eyes shoot to him but he decides to ignore it. “Keep her safe until we get her family to us. And, Lady Avanzini,” his eyes meet hers. “Please help her think about other things.”
“I thought I could stay with you,” you complain as you glance over your shoulder at him. Seungcheol's eyes soften when he allows himself to look down at you, hoping for you to understand. “Will you come to me at least? Be with me?” You whisper, causing his eyes to wince. He doesn't need to be asked twice, though, knowing his answer before the words even left your mouth. He'll do his best to be with you, to be the one bringing you on different thoughts as you wait impatiently.
“Of course,” he whispers back. Your shoulders are visibly less tense now, and you give him a gentle nod. His eyes stay glued to your figure as you stand up and walk around him, joining your friend. He knows this is no time for it, that his priority should be helping your family and thinking about his next moves, but he can't help but think about how beautiful you look, your dress hugging your body in the perfect way, and every part of him wonders just how more gorgeous you'd look if the dress came off.
“Shall I ask another guard to join my side?” Taehyun asks but it takes a second for the King's eyes to pry away from you and focus on him instead.
“No need,” he refuses. “We don't have more knights to spare at the moment and I trust you, Taehyun.” The knight quickly nods, and despite Seungcheol's intentions never being to put pressure on his back, it surely looks like it as he walks out of the study room with the two women.
“May we continue now, Your Majesty?” Kaito steps inside, the rest of the council right behind him. “Not yet,” he shakes his head. “I need to find Mingyu and talk to him.”
“May we know what for?”
“I need to assign him to my sister. Or do any of you wish to put your Princess in any danger?” Their response is immediate, all of them shaking their heads as they step aside to make space for the King, letting him walk away.
Your feet move faster than your mind does, rushing through the palace hallways with Daniela and Taehyun trying to catch up behind you. “You need slow down, they aren't going to run anywhere,” Seungcheol tells you but you went his words out, not even glancing his way. You'll pay your attention to him once you know everyone is safe again. You'll give him all your attention then, no questions asked.
Thanks to only looking ahead, you don't notice the stares you get from staff around you, or the way your lady and knight get lost behind you, only stopping once Seungcheol grabs your hand and forces you to. His tug makes you spin around, crashing against his chest. You don't step back, simply looking up at his chocolate eyes. “Slow down,” he breathes out. Your cheeks heat up, and you aren't sure if it is because of how close you are standing or embarrassment. Possibly both.
“I'm sorry,” you blurt out, gently pressing your palm against his chest as you push yourself back. His grip on your hand only tightens, keeping you close.
“Don't apologize, don't distance yourself from me. Stay with me.” Your eyes wince, lips falling apart but no words come out. So instead, you nod, glancing at your connected hands as you slowly lace your fingers with his. You catch his eyes falling to them as well, his fingers carefully closing around yours. “Let's have dinner tonight,” he says softly, and even though it's not a question, his gaze is uncertain, as if trying to read your thoughts.
“I'd like that,” you agree and his eyes soften, the nervousness you saw washing off. “Just the two of us,” you add for him, a small smile tugging on your lips.
“Just the two of us.”
You don't let go of his hand as you walk trough the halls, this time actually carrying yourself as the Queen you are supposed to be. You are well aware how it must have looked like, what your servants must be saying about you now, but it cannot be changed. Somehow though, with Seungcheol by your side, it doesn't feel as bad as it probably should. It doesn't scare you as much.
As soon as you step outside, you are greeted with your mother's smile as she takes in the sight of you and your husband holding hands. You excuse yourself from him, rushing to your family. “Darling,” your mother's hands rest on your arms, in what seems like a reassuring gesture. “You shine with happiness.”
“You looks beautiful,” Nari joins in and your eyes trail to your younger siblings. Does it look like you shine with happiness? You find yourself thinking about the King a few feet away from you, talking with the knights about something you can't make out. You wouldn't say happiness is the right words, you aren't sure if you can even put a name to what you feel when it comes to him. There are many emotions you could think off — joy, trust, adoration, crave, but also pain, fear, defeat — and together they all mix into confusion.
“Is everyone okay?” You scan them as carefully as you can, deciding not to acknowledge any of their comments at you. You aren't who's important right now, they are. “Everyone is fine,” your father's attention redirects to you, but his words don't reassure you as much as you'd hope. Something simply feels off, like this isn't over just yet.
“How about you take your sisters to the guest chambers and we'll meet you later, darling? We shall greet His Majesty and congratulate him to the wedding.” She doesn't congratulate you to the wedding but you don't mention it, watching her approach your husband.
“It's not fair, I want to go with you,” your brother complains, crossing his arms over his chest. It makes you chuckle as you softly pat his head, promising him you'll steal him later and you'll be able to spend time just the two of you. That seems to work, his eyes sparkling as he runs off to join your mother with a giggle.
“He acts like such a child,” your youngest sister shakes her head and you raise an eyebrow at her, eyeing her up and down.
“And you are so much better?”
“No, she isn't,” Nari scoffs, pushing her younger sister forward and telling her to mind herself before she gets in trouble with the Queen. You shake your head at them. You missed this, honestly. You missed your family and having them everywhere you go. In a sense, it made Veloria feel empty. Nowhere you'd go would you find your siblings running around and making a mess, which just feels odd. Thankfully, that can now change.
“Dinner,” Seungcheol mouths to you as you pass him to assure himself your plan is still on your mind. You nod, your lips seeled together as you try to contain your smile. It's silly, it is just dinner, nothing big. But you feel excited, looking forward to your night. You know you shouldn't get your hopes up considering what happened last night but something tells you he won't run from you again, that this time you might actually sleep in the same bed as your husband.
You lead your youngest sister into her chamber, asking the knight already waiting in front of her room to keep an eye on her. He simply nods, just like you expected him to. “Where to next?” Nari asks, wondering where her chamber will be.
“How would you like to check the Queen's chambers?”
“What?” Her eyes widen and she stops in her tracks. “Wait, no. You cannot.”
“I can,” you assure her. “I'm on my honeymoon,” you grin proudly. “I share a room with my husband now, which leaves my chamber empty. It deserves your love so it doesn't age badly.” You both know it won't, that there are maids taking care of your place even while you are out, but that doesn't stop you from wanting Nari to take it.
“Do you not mind?”
“Not at all,” you shake your head. “In fact, please stay there.” You watch as she bites back her smile, her eyes betraying her and telling you everything you need to know — she wants to stay there.
Leading her into her new chamber, you let her tell you about their trip to Elowen and back. You listen closely, trying to find anything that would explain the attack, anything that would give you a clue. It all just leads to the middle of nowhere, and you are stuck wondering what could have possibly went wrong.
Your family has always had enemies, of course, but it was never like this. Your father made some bad choices, made alliances with the wrong people in the past, but when you were leaving your home, everything was well.
Your name leaves Nari's lips, snapping you out of your thoughts. You glance at her, questioning her with her eyes. “How is it like?”
“How is what like?” You tilt your head in confusion, opening the door for her and following her inside her new chamber. Her eyes immediately scan the room, taking in the beautiful sight. You remember standing in the same place she does when you arrived for the first time, your eyes just as wide.
“How is it like being married?” Her eyes find yours again. You freeze, the spark of want in her eyes catching you off guard. It's this exact moment that makes you miss your family even more, knowing that something happened when you weren't there for her. It's only been a few weeks since you last saw your sister but it feels like ages. You wish you could have been there when thoughts like these started occurring in her mind, when someone who made her want to know of this stuff showed up.
“It's…” you hesitate, rethinking your words. “Thrilling,” you breathe out when the memory of last night appears in your head, the softness of Seungcheol's lips on yours still vivid. You can see him in front of you, in his shirt and messy hair, with his eyes full of hesitance before he closed the space between you, his lips crashing with yours. “And beautiful.” The memory of Seungcheol running away after kissing you flashes in front of your eyes but you push it aside, deciding to ignore it. “But at the same time, I don't feel like much changed.”
Nari hums. “Do you like being married to him?”
“I do,” you answer without hesitation. “I like him, I cannot imagine not liking being married to him.”
“I'm glad,” she mumbles, taking a seat on the bed. “I was worried when we were leaving,” she admits. “About how you were going to do here on your own, if you'll be fine. I even debated asking our parents to stay longer, to stay here as long as possible, but I'm happy to see you happy.”
You smile at her. It's nice to know now that you are gone, your family still has someone looking out for them. “I am,” you assure her. “I do feel happy.”
“Do you think I'd be happy in a marriage?”
“I think you will always have a place in here if anyone makes you question if you are happy or not, even if it's for just a brief second.” She grins, and you take a seat beside her. “Is there a specific someone you are asking this for?”
She looks down into her lap, debating if she should tell you or not. “Me and Lord Nishimura have been exchanging letters ever since the banquet, and I look forward to hearing from him every day,” she finally says, not looking up from her lap. Oh? Every part of you wishes you would have gotten to know him better when he was here for the coronation, that you would have asked him a bunch of different things about him and his place of origin. Maybe you still can. Someone surely knows of him here.
“Does he make you happy?” Is all you need to ask for now, though. All your other questions can wait for later, for someone else. What matters now is how your sister feels.
“Yes,” she nods, meeting your eyes to prove her point. “I think he does.” You hum, a soft smile spreading across your lips as you reach for her hand.
“In that case, just keep doing what are were until now. What's important, is how you feel.”
“What if…” she averts her eyes, gazing at your connected hands. It's been long since you held her hand, since you had the opportunity to be her big sister. You can't remember the last time you sat with just her, talking about whatever that has been bothering her. You need to fix that. You need to find time to spend with all your siblings now that they are here again. “What if they pick someone else for me, though? You haven't married for love either.”
You squeeze her hand. “You are still so young, Nari. You have yet to learn about the world and yourself. You shouldn't have to worry about marriage.” She nods, but you can see how much she hesitates. “I'll talk with our parents,” you proclaim, settling your mind on it. “Yeah? I'll tell them you still have a lot of time and they shouldn't rush you into anything. Trust me, they don't want to go against the Queen of Veloria.” A laugh bubbles out of her and you feel relief washing over you at the same time.
“Not to disrespect you, but I think they won't care as long as they have the King's reassurance of their alliance.”
“Well, then it's a good thing I'm having dinner with him and can ask him to stand by me instead of them,” you grin, standing up from the bed. “Which brings me, I shall prepare. I will see you again, though.” She nods, her smile now much more comfortable.
“Have fun tonight.”
“I will,” you smile back at her.
♡⸝⸝
“This one is it, trust me,” Dani nods proudly as she brings a dress from the rack in the very corner of the room that one of your maids brought when you asked them to prepare you for a dinner with His Majesty. You eye it up and down, your lips seeled together. Her smile falls immediately, a heavy sigh leaving her lips. “No?” You shake your head, apology written all over your face. “Alright, just pick which ever one you like. But if it's ugly, we will seriously need to talk.”
You chuckle, nodding as you make your way towards her, gently running your fingers over the dresses you posses. It's only a small portion of what you actually own, most of your dresses still in the wardrobe in your chambers. It's only for a week that you are supposed to stay in this room, and apparently for those reasons it's not needed for them to bring all your clothes here. You'd like to argue, but you're not even sure if Seungcheol would appreciate you taking over his space. So for now, this will have to do.
“This one,” a smile tugs in the corner of your lips as you take down the same pink dress you wore to your first dinner here, your love for them still the same as that day.
“You have worn that one already,” Daniela points out and you agree. “It is rather plain, Your Majesty,” she adds but despite her dislike, you want to go out in this one. “Okay,” she nods when she notices the plea in your eyes, motioning towards one of the maids to help you out with it. “You have this beige undergarments, I think it'll go perfectly with it.”
“Actually,” you tilt your head sheepishly. “I don't think this dress needs one, right?” Glancing at the maid taking your dress off your hands, you catch her off guard.
“Whatever Her Majesty deems appropriate,” she blurts out quickly and you smile, meeting Dani's eyes again.
“What do you think?”
“I think you are finally speaking my language,” she breathes out a soft laugh, shaking her head at you. “And I'm sure His Majesty will love it too,” she assures you, hurrying you into the washroom. “Now, let's make sure you are fresh and clean as well.”
It's dark outside when you make it into the dinning room. Taehyun excuses himself in front of the door, letting you walk in on your own and taking his position. You smile at him, telling him to relax a bit. He doesn't listen though, keeping his eyes ahead without acknowledging what you just said. Of course he does, he is an amazing knight.
“My apologizes for being late, Your Majesty,” you smile, the door closing behind you. Seungcheol raises his head from the table, his eyes widening immediately upon laying on you. You watch as his expression softens and he motions for one of the guards behind him to pull your chair.
“You are as gorgeous tonight as always, Your Majesty,” he smiles back at you, taking in the sight of you. It honestly feels like a dream. He is unable to take his eyes off you, every inch of his body itching to hold you, to be able to touch your curves and press his lips to yours again. He watches you as you walk to take a seat on the opposite side of the table, quickly stopping you. “Bring Her Majesty a chair besides me. What is with the stupid tradition of man and wife sitting so far away.”
You bite back your smile as you walk over to him, taking a seat on his left. You glance around the room, acknowledging the two knights keeping you company as Seungcheol's knee brushes with yours under the table. It only takes one look from him for the two of them to leave the room, leaving you all alone.
“I love this dress,” Seungcheol breaks the quiet, your smile only widening. “It might be a close second to the one you wore to my coronation.”
“You remember the dress I wore to the coronation?” Your eyes widen. He shrugs like it's no big deal, reaching for your hand on top of the table. You gladly let him wrap his fingers around yours, your eyes flickering between his hand and face.
“I'm confident I could point out every dress you wore around me since you arrived.” You realize you don't need much to feel happy. As long as you are with him, everything he does makes you excited and your cheeks flush.
“I doubt that,” you shake your head, averting your eyes. He squeezes your hand, trying to get you to look at him again. You don't though, too embarrassed to meet his eyes.
Your name leaves his lips, soft and elegant. His voice rings in your ears, making your heart beat faster. You are absolutely gone for him, so terribly gone. You are convinced none of the authors you read up until now were actually in love. The way you feel when you are with him can't compare to anything you have read, the emotions simply too strong to be put into words on paper.
“You consume so much of me I'd have to be blind not to notice and remember everything about you.” And there he goes again, messing with your head. It'd take a miracle for you not to feel like the luckiest person for being able to share these moments with him.
“Stop talking,” you mumble, your voice barely above a whisper. Your head is a mess, the image of him splattered everywhere, the memory of your kiss in the back of your mind and his words repeating in your head. You consume so much of me. How are you supposed to just go on about your dinner? Choi Seungcheol is insane. Absolutely insane. There is no other explanation.
“Baby, look at me.” His words bring you back to earth, your eyes shooting up to his immediately. There is a sheepish smile on his lips, his cheeks catching a hint of pink as well — even though he has yet to match your color. “I mean it.”
You open your mouth to answer, to tell him just how much he means to you, that you love spending time with him, that you love being his wife, that you'd love to kiss him, that you love him, but you don't get the chance to, closing your mouth again when a bunch of servants comes in, carrying your dinner.
You straighten your back, pulling your hand away from his as they set plates in front of you. You can feel his eyes on you as you do, but you don't have the courage to meet them, a part of you too scared he'll tell you he takes it back, or that maybe this isn't what he wants. Clearing your throat, you do your best to focus on the food instead of the man beside you and his knee that is still pressed against yours.
“May I have a question?” You whisper when everyone leaves and you are alone again.
“Always,” he encourages you, taking a bite of his steak.
“Do you know Lord Nishimura?” He tilts his head confusedly, obviously not a question he expected. And if he is honest, it doesn't feel the greatest having you ask him about a different man after he has opened himself to you without getting an answer. He feels vulnerable — a feeling he is starting to despise.
“Not much,” he shrugs, as if it didn't bother him at all. He knows it's probably stupid, that he is thinking about stuff that might have not even crossed your mind, but he can't help it. He is starting to realize he cares more than he'd want to admit.
“He's been sending letters to my sister,” you explain, as if you could read his mind, riding him off all his worries.
“Which one?” His eyes narrow and you roll your eyes, a bit worried he'd even consider you are talking of your thirteen year old sister.
“Nari. She said they've been writing letters to each other since they met at the banquet. He seemed fine but, I don't know, I think I just wanted to make sure you didn't know of anything I shall look out for.”
Seungcheol smiles again, assuring you that even thought he doesn't know him much, he hasn't heard of anything that should make you overthink this. “But if it'll make you calmer, we could ask Seungkwan tomorrow. It is a part of his job to know everyone, so I am sure he will be able to answer your questions better.”
“Thank you,” you whisper with a smile, the way he talks of you as a duo, a pair, only making you happier.
A comfortable silence settles over you as you eat your food, stealing glances at your husband every once in a while. He catches you each time, his eyes meeting yours with a smile. You return his smile, finding yourself only falling for him more and more.
He places his cutlery down on his plate, tilting his head slightly as his eyes rest on you. You pretend like you don't see it, but you are pretty sure your flushed cheeks give you away. “Tell me about flowers,” he says and you almost choke on your own saliva. His eyes widen, his hand on your back in an instance, panic rushing through his veins. You shake your head in the air, bringing a glass of water to your lips to prevent any more coughing.
“You want me to tell you about flowers?” You ask, gazing into his worried eyes. They soften when he sees you are okay, and he relaxes again, nodding. Choi Seungcheol, possibly the greatest man you have met in your entire life, wants you to talk about flowers, your favorite thing in the world. The universe really took his time with this one, building him to an absolute perfection. “What do you want to know?”
“Anything. Why do you love them so much? All of your favorites, and if I should ask the gardeners to plant any of your favorites or if we have them all already.”
You find yourself melting slowly, your adoration for him only growing. Setting down your cutlery as well, you bite back your smile, thinking about your answer to all of them. “There is many kinds, it is incredibly hard to pick just one favorite. Lilies are beautiful, and seemingly many people's favorite, but so are tulips and orchids.”
“Which one is your favorite?” He prompts.
You hesitate, thinking about all the beauties the Veloria gardens have to offer. “Freesias, I suppose. They are the first flowers I took into my room after arriving here.”
“But those can't be the first flowers you loved.”
“They aren't,” you agree. “But they became my favorite the moment I set them in my chamber. I took them after our first dinner, when I was wearing this very dress.” His eyes scan your body again at the mention of your clothes, taking his sweet time craving the image into his head. “When I first became interested in nature, it was lilies that spoke to me the most,” you admit. “But I was six then, and all I knew were the few kinds we grew in our gardens.”
He listens closely without interruptions. The interest in his eyes would be obvious from miles away, and it only makes you keep going. “Ours were nothing like yours, so I only knew a small portion of them. Then, when I was twelve, I started reading about flowers, what they mean, what colors they can have and which ones are used for what. They were always my escape, a home, if you know what I mean?” You meet his eyes, blushing.
“I think I do,” he nods, reaching for your hand. You hold his hand in yours, watching as he laces your fingers together. “A comfort, a place where you could be yourself. I was told that is the same reason my mother had our gardens build — so she could have a place to run to.” He hesitates for a second, scanning your face. “Is that why you've been in our gardens so much? Were you looking for a safe space?”
“In a way,” you nod. “I think I was. But I learned to find comfort somewhere else as well since I arrived, in someone else,” you admit. “But then after our kiss, when you ran away—” your voice breaks, the memory right in front of your eyes. “The gardens were the only comfort I trusted.”
“I'm sorry,” his voice sounds just as broken, everything about his expression making you believe he truly means it. “I was scared. And I know it's stupid.” You squeeze his hand, hoping to give him the reassurance he so desperately needs. “But I was scared of you. Of what it might mean if I let myself fall, if I allowed myself to be vulnerable.”
“I was raised to be strong, forced to believe a King must have everything under control, including his emotions for the prettiest girl he's ever seen. So I ran, I ran away and buried myself in work so I wouldn't be able to think about how much I just wanted to go back to you and kiss you again, sleep in the same bed with you and wrap myself around you.”
“Do all that today then,” you whisper, your eyes pleading as you gaze into his. “Don't run away again and stay with me.”
He doesn't need to be told twice, reaching with his free hand for your chair and pulling you closer. You yelp, caught off guard. But as soon as your legs rest between his and he leans closer, your eyes soften again. His lips press against yours and you can instantly feel sparks in your stomach. This is one thing they got right in the books — it truly feels like fireworks. His right hand cups your cheek, tilting your head as he deepens the kiss, his left hand squeezing your waist.
You push your plate aside as you rest your hand on the table, trying to steady yourself. But it's hard, your body not listening to you and melting into his touch. You don't even register him picking you up and pulling you into his lap, but when you open your eyes again you find yourself exactly there. His eyes search your face for any sign of discomfort but he doesn't find any. Cupping his cheeks, you take your time just admiring him. “I love you,” you whisper, the words spilling from your lips before you can stop them.
You watch as his eyes widen and something in him stops, a groan leaving his lips as his hand moves from your cheek to your neck, slightly pressing on the sides, his lips on yours again. Your eyes roll back, your legs weak. Everything about him — the way he looks at you, the way he holds you — makes your head spin, his presence consuming you.
Your hands wrap behind his neck, fingers tangling in his hair as you moan into his mouth, pleasure taking over you. You're not sure what is happening, why you get a sudden itch between your legs or why there is so many butterflies in your stomach, but you know you don't want him to stop kissing you.
“Seungcheol,” his name leaves your lips, a quiet, broken, plea. He seems to understand your needs much more than you do, nodding into the kiss.
“I got you,” he promises, his voice ringing in your ears.
Seungcheol scoops you up in his arms, erupting a laugh out of you, a sound he is learning to be obsessed with. You hold tightly onto him, your arms wrapped around his neck. “I should have carried you like this to bed on our wedding night,” he shakes his head, regretting all his choices.
“You are doing it now,” you remind him, a smile decorating your already beautiful face. He is unable to take his eyes off you, knocking onto the door with his feet so someone would open them for him. Without waiting for the door, his mouth presses against yours again, similar smile you carry on his lips.
“Your Majesty—” Taehyun stops mid sentence, stepping aside to create more space for the two of you. Seungcheol pulls away from you for a moment, only so he can speak to him. “We won't be needing an escort,” he proclaims. “You can send guards to our door in,” he glances at you, taking in the sight of your innocent eyes batting your eyelashes at him. “Just take your time,” he finishes, not looking at him again as he claims your lips, carrying you into his chambers.
The moment your feet hit the ground again, his hands are on your waist, squeezing as much flesh as he can gather in his hands, pushing you back until your back is flat against the door. “Cheol,” you moan, your head falling back. Your lips are swollen at this point but it only makes him want to kiss you more, knowing he is the one who has turned you into such mess. Your entire body burns, needing to be closer to him.
“You asked about children,” he mumbles, his lips tracing wet kissing down your neck, paying attention to every bit of skin he can reach. “How they are made.” A soft, barely audible, whimper escapes you, sending a shiver down his spine. He'll need to hear another one, one much louder preferably. “Let me show you.”
“Seungcheol,” you beg him, unsure what it even is you are asking for, tugging on his hair. His hand slowly moves onto your back, harshly tugging on the laces holding your dress in place. He moves with a plan in his head, not wasting any time at taking the awfully gorgeous dress off your body.
“Is this okay?” His eyes find yours, waiting for your approval before letting your dress drop to the floor. A loud groan slips from his lips at the sight of your bare skin, breast on full display. “You aren't wearing any undergarments,” he mumbles, the realization making his head spin. You hum, your cheeks flushed as you watch his reaction, your nerves obvious. But if there is one thing he wants to show you it's how you have no reason to feel nervous around him. “You are so beautiful,” he reminds you, cupping your breast with his hands. They fit perfectly, his cock twitching inside his pants.
“Do you want my baby, love?” He asks, his mouth a mere inch from yours. “Do you want me to show you how we could make one?” You nod, desperate to feel him closer, to have his body press against yours.
“Please,” you beg. He doesn't need to be told twice, squeezing your breast in his hands before slowly kissing his way down your body until he is kneeling in front of you. Your fingers tangle in his hair in an instance, the sight of him on his knees, with his eyes glued to yours, making you moan again. His lips press to your bare thighs, taking his time showing love to all of you. Leaving a few marks behind, he faces your glistening pussy, all wet and ready for him.
“Have you ever…touched yourself?” You quickly shake your head at his question, your cheeks only turning more and more red. “There is this place,” he starts, carefully sliding his fingers between your folds. “That brings you pleasure, that makes you feel good,” his thumb presses against your clit, his eyes staying on your face to watch for your reactions. Your eyebrows furrow together, lips tightly pressing together as you try to contain the lewd sounds building in your throat in.
Your hips buck forwards on instincts, creating a smirk on his lips. “Do you trust me, my love?” He asks and you nod without hesitation, giving him all of you. Collecting your wetness on his fingers, he slowly thrusts his middle finger into your hole, slowly testing the waters. Your mouth falls open, your moans filling his ears as he wraps his lips around your bud.
If Seungcheol is anything, it's talented. Both of your hands find his hair as soon as his tongue slides over your clit, adding second finger. A part of you wants to pull him away, get rid of the intense pleasure he makes you feel, but a bigger part of you wants to pull him even closer. Glancing up at you, he continues working you with his mouth. Pulling his fingers out and making you whimper, he moves his hand to the back of your thigh, pulling your leg over his shoulder and telling you to hold onto him. You do, listening to his every word.
His tongue slides between your folds, his nose rubbing against your clit. His hums against your wet pussy make you shiver, back arching onto him. Your desperate cries only drive him crazier, precum leaking through his undergarments as he laps on your pussy.
There have been women he fucked before, women he went home with to relieve the build up tension — but never like this. He's never wished to have anyone as close as you are, and he's certainly never wanted anyone to come on his tongue so badly. Usually, he'd just quickly get it over with, chasing his own pleasure and then out, but not with you. He wants to take his time with you, devour every inch of you and take care of you. He'd be damned if he doesn't make you come multiple times tonight.
“Cheol!” You gasp, making him wince as you pull on his hair. He might end up with a bald spot at this point but he doesn't care enough, convinced this is all worth it. Your release comes crashing down on you, your eyes rolling back and hips rocking forward as he licks you clean, not letting a single bit go to waste.
He pushes back, ignoring the painfully hard cock in his pants and letting his eyes trail your body. Your legs shake, the orgasm obviously much stronger than he thought it was. It makes sense, he supposes. This is the first orgasm you felt after all. The realization hits him like lighting, his eyes widening and his cock twitching again. He is the first person to make you come. He is the first person to make you feel this good. God, he has a problem.
“Come here,” he whispers and you allow yourself to fall into his arms, your body visibly exhausted. “Can I continue?” He asks, his voice nothing if not gentle as he brushes your sweaty hair behind your ears.
“Continue?” You blink, causing a low chuckle to escape his lips.
“Babies don't come from this alone,” he explains, rubbing his fingers between your folds again. “You need to get my sperm into this pretty cunt of yours,” he thrusts two fingers inside, stretching you out. “But we don't have to do anything today,” he assures you, pressing a kiss to your temple. “We can go to bed and sleep. We have our entire lives ahead together for that.” As soon as the words leave his lips his cheeks flush, the idea of spending the rest of his live together making him much more excited than he'd want to admit.
You shake your head, cupping his cheeks. His eyes gaze into yours, finding himself falling even deeper for you. “Give me a baby, Seungcheol. I wanna carry your baby.” If he was feeling feral before, he can't quite put a name to the desire that takes over him now, his entire body moving quicker than he can comprehend. A giggle bubbles out of you as he carries you to the bed, his lips glued to yours as he cups your breast again, rolling your nipples between his fingers. Your hands lock on the back of his neck, pulling him as close as possible.
“You make me lose my mind,” he mumbles between kisses, never staying away for too long. “Did you cast a spell on me?” You laugh, the sound echoing in his ears.
“Obviously,” you smile, watching as he pushes back and fights with the buttons on his shirt, hating being apart for so long. You sit up, helping him get his clothes off.
Everything is gone in seconds, all of his clothes splattered over the floor. It is certainly an ego boost, watching as your eyes trail down his body, gawking at his naked skin. Your pretty hand wraps around his cock, your eyes flickering to his. It's barely anything, just a brush of your fingers, but it makes him twitch nonetheless, every inch of him itching to see you jerk him off. The image of your lips wrapped around him flashes in front of his eyes, making him groan. There will be another time for that, he has to remind himself.
“Lay down, pretty. I'll take care of you, hm?” You look up at him through your lashes, the big puppy eyes you give him making him adore you even more. He watches you as you follow his words, your lips slightly parted and eyes sparkling with expectation. Settling between your legs, his lips find yours again, allowing you to focus on the kiss as he collects your wetness on his tip, rubbing his cock on your heat.
“Just focus on me, okay?” You nod, trusting him fully. Your lips fall apart, a soft gasp escaping when he pushes the tip in, giving you all the time you need to adjust. He doesn't rush, doesn't force you into anything. His thrusts are slow and controlled, the urge to chase his own orgasm as quickly as possible pushed aside when he is with you. He might have been with other women before you, but this is the first time it feels like this — like it actually matters.
Praises slip off his lips without him thinking much about what he is saying, one of his hands resting beside your head and keeping him up while the other plays with your breast, unable to get enough of how well they fit in his palm. The longer he looks at you, the more convinced he is he won in life. There is no one more incredible than you he'd want to spend his life with.
“Does this feel good?” You don't answer, broken whines leaving your lips instead. It makes him chuckle, loving how good he makes you feel. Your moans fill his ears as he slowly picks up his speed, feeling your walls squeeze around him. Your eyes are filled with lust as you look at him, his name falling off your lips like a prayer. With your hips rocking forward, your orgasm comes crashing down onto you faster than he thought it would. He wanted to come with you, but this will have to do as well.
Your name falls off his lips as he chases his own orgasm, only needing a few more thrusts after you. You gummy walls clench around him, driving him over the edge. Seungcheol's groan rings in your ears as he finishes inside you, thrusting a few more times just to make sure nothing leaves your body. As soon as he pulls back, he misses the feeling of your warmth. His eyes trail down your body, taking in the sight. He'll have to look at your every night to be satisfied. He doubts he'll ever get enough of looking at you.
“That was amazing,” you breathe out and his eyes find yours. A smile spreads on his lips, his eyes soft.
“You were amazing,” he proclaims, brushing the messy strands of your hair aside. “Do you feel okay?” You nod, because the truth is, you feel better than ever before.
“Is this what people do to make children?”
He nods, “It doesn't always have to be just to expect children. We can do this as much as you'd like. Just because. Just because we are married and love each other.” Your flushed cheeks and fucked out eyes make you absolutely stunning, the messy side of you attracting him as much as the put together one he saw earlier at dinner.
“Good,” you laugh. “It feels good.”
Seungcheol leans down, kissing your lips again. He falls down beside you, his arms wrapping around your waist before pulling you into his chest, closing his eyes. Tonight is going to be a great night. It might be the first night he gets to sleep beside you at night, but he certainly doesn't intend for it to be the last one. This is only the beginning.
You feel different when you wake up. It might be because of the man you wake up next to, or maybe it's because of the warm shower you take as soon as you get out of bed.
Who are you kidding, it's definitely because of Seungcheol.
His arms stayed wrapped around you throughout the entire night, his touch keeping you warm. You thought their pillows were incredible when you arrived, but now you know nothing compares to the feeling of sleeping on your lover's chest.
Or the feeling of his cock sliding between your folds as soon as you are both awake while he presses kisses all over your shoulders and back. You definitely don't mind getting used to this. You learned about love from books, about how such emotion was supposed to look and feel like, but you are starting to realize pages don't show you everything you need to know. If they told you about this part of love — the lewd noises and messy kisses — you are sure you would have wanted a husband much sooner. If you only knew about what it truly meant to be married, you wouldn't be so opposed to the idea.
When you shared your thoughts with your husband his smile fell off, muttering under his breath how he is glad you didn't in fact get married before he was looking for a wife. It made you laugh. It only took a few kisses and secret promises of forever to get his mood back up, both of you smiling as you left the chamber to do your own things.
“You have sparks in your eyes, Your Majesty,” Daniela's voice is teasing as she looks at you, a knowing smile on her face. “Did you have fun with His Majesty last night? On the dinner, of course.” You roll your eyes but a smile spreads on your lips. You meet her eyes, shrugging as if you had no idea what she's talking about. You are starting to understand her. The comments she's made before about men, comments you were certain would ruin her reputation if anyone caught her — it makes sense now. You don't blame her. In fact, you are quite certain you'll be craving your husband's touch a lot from now on, itching to be with him whenever you are apart.
“Are you certain you want to spend you honeymoon with me instead of your husband, Your Majesty?” Seungkwan asks you, his eyes nervously flickering between you and your lady. You don't have to turn around to know Daniela is giving him a look.
“I shall know what is best for me, don't you think?” He quickly agrees with you, blurting out apologies. “Besides, my husband is busy trying to find out who attacked my family. I couldn't be with him either way,” you glance at your lady, explaining it to her rather than the Head Advisor in front of you. She simply smiles at you, acting all innocent. Shaking your head at her, you walk forwards, taking a seat at the head of the table where you breakfast already lays. Taking a sip of your morning tea, you find Seungkwan with your eyes again. “I wanted to ask you about Lord Nishimura.”
“Nishimura?” He repeats, tilting his head slightly. You see the exact moment the name clicks and he connects it to a face. “Oh, yes,” he nods. “What would you like to know?”
“Do you think he is a nice man?”
“That isn't as easy to say as you'd like it to be, Your Majesty.” You hum, knowing he is right. The world isn't just black and white, there isn't just good or bad, but it'd still ease your mind if he could tell you yes. “I can tell you I haven't heard of anything that would make me think otherwise. As far as I know, he is a great swordsman and even though his studies weren't the greatest, he is growing into a well trained man.”
“My sister might hold an interest in him,” you explain, taking a bite. “And I'm simply worried if she isn't going to get hurt.”
“Did you have any certainty you wouldn't get hurt coming here, Your Majesty?” He asks back. Some might take it as a form of disrespect, but you simply smile, knowing what he means. Of course you didn't. You had no idea what to expect of Veloria and after arriving, you spent every free minute hiding in the gardens looking for an escape. He is right, there is no way to know without risking it.
“Thank you,” you smile at him, a quiet understanding passing between you. He smiles back, looking down at the table. “You should eat with me before you go.”
“Oh, no, Your Majesty,” he quickly shakes his head. “I shouldn't. In fact, I should get back to work soon. His Majesty only allowed me to miss the meeting because it was you who wanted to speak with me.”
“I insist. If you get into any trouble, I will talk to my husband about it and make sure he understands,” you smile, trying to focus on the man ahead of you and not the scene with Seungcheol beneath you that paints in your head. A part of you wishes for Seungkwan to get into trouble, simply so you could have a chat about it with your husband. Preferably one that involves less talking and more of your new favorite activity.
Seungkwan opens his mouth, probably to convince you otherwise, you assume, but he is interrupted by the door opening, two knights rushing into the room. “Mr. Boo,” he blurts out without acknowledging you. It sparks your interest, your head tilting to the side to see better. “We are here to escort you into the study room.”
“Why shall that be?” You interrupt, having all three men turn to you.
“Your Majesty,” the knights bow quickly, realizing their mistake. “My apologies for interrupting your breakfast. We have a direct command to bring Mr. Boo to His Majesty as soon as possible.” He doesn't tell you more, doesn't explain what is so urgent that they have to take him away from you. You don't question it further either, glancing at Daniela instead. She understands exactly what you want to say without any words needed, nodding to you.
Quickly standing up from the table, you follow the knights and Seungkwan out of the room, only to be met with a knight much more familiar to you. “Your Majesty, wait here,” he stands in your way and you are forced to watch the knights leave without you.
“Taehyun, don't stand in our way right now. What if something happened?” Daniela speaks up and his gaze shifts to her immediately, apology written all over his eyes. It only makes you more worried. What could have possibly happened for them to be acting like this? “Taehyun,” she tilts her head, worries written all over her face. “What is going on?”
He mimics her movement, his head tilting as he whispers an apology towards her. It's your turn to push at him, demanding to know what is going on and if anything happened to your husband. “There is a lead,” he finally admits. “And I have an order from His Majesty to keep you far away from there, no matter how much you ask me to take you to him or if you give me an order.” Your eyebrows furrow together in confusion. How can he think you'll leave it all to him again? God damn it, he has a wife now to stand by his side, so why does he keep trying to take care of everything on his own?
“It is for your safety, Your Majesty,” he assures you. His eyes fall to your lady again, hesitating. “My order only applies to Her Majesty, so I cannot stop you if you want to follow them, but I beg you.” Your eyes flicker between the two of them, realization settling in. Oh. Oh god. Were you so focused on your new relationship with Seungcheol you didn't notice one of your closest people falling in love? “Stay here. Let me protect you both for once.”
She sighs, nodding in defeat. You watch as relief washes over him, deciding not to make it any harder on him today. Turning around, you walk back into the dinning room with Dani and Taehyun right behind you, settling back in your chair. “Can you at least explain to me what's happening out there? What lead do they have?”
His hesitation is clear as day, fighting with himself about if he should tell you or not. “I don't know everything. Actually, I'm sure I don't know even half of it. But I caught a bit of their conversation, saying it might be someone from the palace.”
“From the palace? My parents' palace?” You question, all kinds of possibilities running through your head. You can't imagine anyone you grew up alone being behind this. It doesn't make sense. Your father has made enemies, but surely not with anyone on the inside, right?
“Your palace, Your Majesty,” he corrects you, making your eyes widen. This place. This very place you are ruling. That makes even less sense. Why would anyone from your people attack your family? You haven't had a proper chance to introduce yourself to them, thou you couldn't have angered anyone. Right?
“Taehyun, take me to my husband,” you ask but it's really a command. He shakes his head, refusing. “Taehyun. I mean it when I say I will convince him to fire you if you don't take me to him right now. Your job is to protect me, so protect me while I run towards danger.” His eyes flicker from you to Daniela, trying to see her reaction. You can almost see the internal fight he is having and you hate being the one forcing him into this situation. There is nothing you can do, though. You need to be a part of this.
“Okay, fine,” he sighs. “But try not to make my job any harder, could you?” You grin, jumping up from your chair again. “Your Majesty, please,” you can hear the regret in his voice but you don't acknowledge it, simply walking out of the dinning room, heading straight for the study room.
As soon as you push the door wide open you feel all the eyes in the room on you. You do your best not to show your anxiety, clearing your throat and straightening your back. “What are you doing here?” Seungcheol's eyes narrow at you before glancing at your knight. “Weren't you supposed to keep her safe away from all of this?”
You hear Taehyun gulp beside you unsure of what to say, and decide to jump in before he can. “Why do you keep doing this?” You question, everything about your tone giving away that you are upset. “Why do you keep trying to push me away instead of asking for my help? I thought we were done with this!”
A few whispers from the side catch your attention but you keep your eyes on your husband, watching as his shield slowly falls apart, his fight mode turning into something much calmer — something you love much more. There is an apology written all over his eyes, making you sigh. He motions with his head for you to join and you do, giving him one last disappointed look before taking his side. His arm wraps around your waist within seconds. “I didn't mean it like that,” he whispers so only you can hear. You only hum back, eying the council members in front of you.
“Who will explain to me what is going on?”
You watch the men exchange a look, debating what to do. It is only when Seungcheol prompts them to continue that they do, and you hate how even though you are their Queen just as much as he is their King, you still need his approval for people to listen to you. “As I was saying,” Kaito clears his throat. “Our next move should be finding William and arresting him as quickly as we can.”
“William?” Your eyes widen. There is only one William from the palace you've heard of, and it is hard to believe someone like him would be behind an attack on your family. “The previous Head Advisor?”
“We think it's his response to how I treated him on the coronation day. He wasn't aware I was replacing him, and probably wasn't happy with how I announced it either,” Seungcheol explains, his grip on your waist tightening — a possessive movement that makes your head spin. You know it's no time for that right now but he makes you weak in the knees. “He never liked the idea of us getting married either, so I think it all just pilled up. I'm sorry it is my fault your family got attacked,” the last sentence stays a secret between just the two of you, a whisper he hates saying out loud. It eats him alive, knowing he is causing you pain even after everything.
♡⸝⸝
You aren't sure how long you stand here for. Time blurs together as you listen to all the men talking, only some of their words sticking with you. You know the important — they have a plan how to get William. Taehyun and the rest of the knights leave the room, going to collect as many people as possible. The council and Seungkwan follow right after, leaving you alone with your husband.
Seungcheol takes a seat on his chair, spreading his legs apart and pulling you between them. You look down at him, holding his hands as he takes the sight of you in. “I'm sorry,” he apologizes without hesitation, squeezing your hands in his. You don't say anything, keeping your eyes on his. “I don't mean to push you away — I never want to push you away. Protecting my people is what I know the best, and my first instinct was to keep you save far away from this, with someone I know would protect you when I cannot.”
“It is the thought of you hurt that makes me act like a fool, because the truth is, I am a fool. I turn into a fool when it comes to you. I am sorry you felt like I was pushing you away. Those were never my intentions,” he assures you and a heavy sigh leaves your lips.
You sit in his lap, looking down at your connected hands. “I know. I know, love.”
“And I am also sorry for bringing all this onto your family. I should have never replaced him, none of this would have happened if I just learned to rule with him by my side.”
You shake your head, letting go of his hands so you could cup his face. “It is not your fault. You did everything right,” you proclaim. “I would hate to see you miserable and we both know ruling with William on your side would make you feel that way. And who knows, maybe he would have found a different reason, maybe he would have targeted you instead. You can't blame yourself for what happened.”
“You are the definition of perfection,” a soft laugh bubbles from his lips as he shakes his head in disbelieve — disbelieve that he gets to be here with you, share moments with you, and call you his. Closing the space between you, his lips press onto yours, letting you forget for a moment where you are and why you are here. You let him pull you closer and tug your hair behind your ear, allowing yourself to enjoy the moment instead of thinking about what is happening outside of these four walls.
But you have to get back into reality no matter how much you wish otherwise, pulling away with a soft smile. “When this is all over,” you promise him, your palm resting on his chest. “Once everything is behind us and we can focus on just us.” He smiles back, agreeing.
“Once this is over,” he nods. “Lets have dinner together.” You roll your eyes, remembering where your dinner night lead to last time. Not that you would be complaining. “So you can tell me how it's possible Taehyun brought you here despite my direct order not to listen to any of your orders,” a smile tugs at his lips, one you absolutely adore.
You shrug, acting all innocent. “What can I say, I have that effect on people,” you smile, trying to stand up. He only tugs you back, pulling you onto him. His eyes are narrowed, trying to read your face. He is jealous, that much would be clear to anyone. If he gets like this when he is jealous, you might have to make him feel that way more. “Relax, I have threatened to fire him if he didn't listen to me. I convinced him I have you wrapped around my finger and if I said I want him gone you would do it.”
“You weren't lying,” he says without hesitation, making your grin widen.
“I know,” your smile is impossible to hide as you escape his hold, glancing over your shoulder as you walk to the door. “You should do your best to take care of this. I'll be waiting for you in our chambers.” You disappear from the room before he can say anything, giggling as you think about the look on his face — his eyes wide, excited.
Being married is thrilling and beautiful, you explained that to Nari perfectly.
If there is one thing Seungcheol appreciates, it's having you by his side.
You stood by him through it all, holding his hand when he announced to his people a betrayal happened within the palace walls, and you were there to explain to them he has been arrested by your best knights when he couldn't do so, feeling like it was all his fault.
William was brought in front of the council shortly after Taehyun and others left the study. When Seungcheol heard they found him in a local pub, taking with the common about secrets he's learned during his stay and bad mounting his ill father, his anger only grew. Taking revenge at him was one thing, holding it against him for humiliating him during his coronation was understandable too, but everything else was making his blood boil. How dared he? Attacking your family already crossed the line, but talking ill of his father who has done nothing but trusted William's judgment was only adding salt into the wound.
There was nothing he wanted to do more than wipe the awfully annoying smirk off William's face when he saw him. But you were there again, with your arms wrapped around his and reminding him where he stands.
It didn't take long to decide of his future, his punishment. The entire council agreed on a form worthy of his betrayals within minutes. But it was your opinion that mattered to him the most. If you agreed with the rest of his men, he wouldn't hesitate executing him in the center of the town for everyone to see. But deep down he knew that wasn't something you'd agree with, which was also why he waited for your comment.
And despite the council's arguments, trying to convince him such actions shall never be forgiven, he decided for exile. William might still be able to walk around, but far, far away from you or your family. And if he even dared to come close or conspire against the kingdom, he would make it his personal mission to get rid of him.
He was send away the following day along with the people conspiring with him. Turns out, his experience in the palace didn't teach him well enough who to have as a friend and who as an enemy. He's made many mistakes on his way, mistakes that helped the knight discover his plans and contacts.
Ever since, he'd like to say the palace became quite calm. Quiet even.
Well, except for the rather loud sounds he finds himself making every time he is with you alone. With his head thrown back and his hand in your hair, he has to bite back his groans. Despite knowing the throne room is empty, the thoughts of one of the knights passing by and hearing him through the closed door makes him do everything in his power to keep his voice down.
He's never thought of himself as someone loud. But then again, he also never thought of himself as someone worth finding love, someone who deserved all this attention you are giving him. Meeting you turned his entire world upside down in the best way, and he now finds himself learning something new about himself every day. For example, how desperately he wishes to have children, especially if it is with you.
“Fuck—” he curses, looking down at your lips wrapped around his cock. The simple scene has him twitching in your mouth and he has to fight himself not to come already. “Darling, you are going to make me lose my mind,” he groans, his free hand gripping the throne armrest. He watches you smirk, your tongue swirling over his tip. God dammit. He should have never taught you any of this. He should have just lived his life with eating you out instead of telling you there is a way for you to do the same. This is on him.
Even though he must say, you are doing an incredible job. You bat your eyelashes at him as you bob your head forward, making his eyes roll back. He didn't think becoming a King would mean having his cock sucked as he sits on the throne, but truth is, he cannot complain.
“I haven't bled yet,” you mumble when you pull back and the words echo in his ears. It is crazy just how much power you hold over him, how much your words can mess with his head. Because it is then, when he realizes what you mean that he finishes, covering your lips white. He watches your eyes widen, cursing under his breath again. That is far from how and where he wanted to cum.
“Can you repeat that?”
You laugh, licking your lips clean. Standing up from the floor and fixing your dress, you watch him with a sheepish smile. “It has been over a month since I bled last,” you repeat, your eyes falling to his cock to see if it does anything with him again. “I can't be sure, though.”
Your last words barely reach his ears as he reaches for your hand and pulls you onto him, his lips crashing with yours. You gasp from shock before melting into his touch, tilting your head as he kisses you. Seungcheol is convinced he will never get over how it feels to kiss you, how his head spins when he feels his lips on yours.
“I'll be a father,” a soft laugh full of disbelieve leaves his lips, making you smile. “And you'll be the mother of our kids. Our kids.” You nod, unable to control the excitement you feel when you look at him. Pressing your lips to his once again, you let him pull you onto his lap.
“Our kids,” you agree, loving how it sounds on your tongue. You share the same shock as he does, the realization just how far you have come settling in. It is unbelievable you get to spend the rest of your live with Seungcheol — the greatest man you have ever met — by your side. He makes everything better, easier. If it's with him, you truly believe fulfilling your duties isn't as unbearable as you once thought of them to be.
𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ; Y/n wakes her boyfriend up on his birthday with a blow job to start his day right.
𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 ; Boyfriend!Mingi x Fem!Reader.
☆ — 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 490. ☆ — 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 : Smut. ☆ — 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : Oral (m!rec), somnophilia, teasing, pet names, head holding, dirty talk, gagging, deep throating, throat fucking, praise, and cum eating.
♡ — 𝐕𝐢𝐩 𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 ; @kissmatz @eggielix @miisanthropology @liaaaafixofff @chanscappuccino @eunseoksgirl @threepointstogrifendor @mingkisdoll @groovyravenagain @matznana @smuttaburger @barbtiny @yeosangholic1 @maliabobea15 @pyuddings @mourninglizzy @joonginism @m4rs-m00ni3 @sangieholic @bren00na send a ask to be added or removed!
A/N — HAPPY MINGI DAY :D wrote this while completely exhausted. So my apologies if it’s terrible.
You woke up before Mingi for once, the sunlight barely peaking in through the curtains.
You smiled softly to yourself, turning over carefully to face your sleeping boyfriend. Watching his chest rise and fall with every soft breath as an idea struck your head.
Today was Mingi’s birthday, and as the sweet girlfriend you were. You wanted him to start the day off right. You ever so gently moved yourself down the bed, making sure you were completely covered by the duvet as you settled between Mingi’s thighs.
You raised an eyebrow from seeing he was already hard, probably from the dreams he was having. You didn’t mind, it was just one less step for you.
Your fingers were feather light as you pulled his boxers down just enough to let his cock spring free, holding your breath slightly as Mingi adjusted his sleeping position by spreading his legs wider. Which was an everyday occurrence because he’s genuinely just a bed hog.
After waiting a moment you finally lowered your head to be level with dick. You pressed soft kisses along his shaft like you always do, feeling it twitch slightly despite being heavily asleep.
Kissing your way back up to his tip, you decided to press your tongue flat against his meatus, collecting the slight dribble of precum that leaked out before swirling your tongue around his cockhead.
The sensation of your tongue made Mingi stir slightly, grinding his hips up ever so slightly to try to push himself deeper into your mouth. But you didn’t let him, your hands remained gentle on his hips to keep him from moving.
The gentle restriction combined with your tongue kitten licking his tip made mingi’s eyes flutter open “Please, babygirl. Don’t do this to me…” His voice was heavy with sleep.
One of Mingi’s hands moved to under the blanket to hold your head as you finally stopped teasing him. Your head bobbing up and down on his cock while wet sucking sounds echoed in the quiet bedroom.
“That’s right, be a pretty girl for me. You can go deeper than that…” Mingi grunted out, trying to keep himself from pushing your head to make you deep throat him.
You obeyed, deciding to give your birthday boy what he wants. Gagging slightly as he completely swallow his member down your throat. Mingi’s hands held your head there out of instinct, his hips grinding against your face due to his needs building up inside him.
“Fuck…such a good girl, letting me fuck you like this so early in the morning…” Mingi half growled out as his thrusts started to get more rough and frenzied, a clear sign he was about to cum.
He thrusted his hips up one last time, making you gag again from the angle as he came. Holding your head completely still until he was done, watching you swallow his cum made him crave more than just a blowjob.
Summary: You and Seungcheol both run hot. It doesn’t help that you share everything important: a job, friends, office supplies, and a deep burning hatred for each other. While competing for the same work promotion, you slowly start to confront the realization that maybe Seungcheol isn’t as terrible as you thought. Maybe he’s the spark that will keep you from burning out.
Genre: Office!AU, Enemies to Lovers
Pairings: Seungcheol x Reader, Mingyu x OFC, Joshua x Jeonghan
Word Count: 52,314 😱
Warnings: Alcohol use, angst, tattoos, pining, jeonghan is a highly questionable HR manager, microsoft powerpoint hate space, named reader, smut, oral sex, safe sex, masturbation, romance, seungcheol and the reader fall so hard for each other and end up disgustingly in love
Read on AO3: Fire and Fire
All four chapters are available as of today!
Playlist: AURORA (feat. Crush) - Penomeco | Picky Baby (feat. BIBI) - Owell Mood | End of the World (feat. GSoul) - Epik High | Tattoo - ELO, Jay Park | Problem (feat. pH-1) - Jiselle
Comments/reblogs are always super appreciated! There may be spinoffs to this so if you have any interest in more, please let me know!
Summary - Loving your boss is frowned upon. Hundreds of incidents suggest you to bottle your feelings and put on a professional upfront. Things get out of hand on the two days and one night work trip. You are nothing but a putty in hands of your boss, Choi Seungcheol.
Tags: boss!Seungcheol x f.reader, fluff, pining
Warnings: sighs, swearing, kissing, making out, spanking, biting I-- dont ask me what happened. Very suggestive but no explicit smut.MDNI
Word Count: 5.7k
Requests - “grow up and get in the damn bed!” “why do you want me in bed so badly, huh?” + "i can't want you, and yet i do. gods, i want you." + trailing your fingers against their exposed back.
A's note: - Anon, the moment I saw your three requests (hoping its you who sent them all) I immediately wanted to combine them all and make a little one shot. Hope you enjoy reading it and please let me know your thoughts!!! Happy reading everyone!! Please leave your thoughts in comments/asks/reblogs.
Prompts are from @/celestialwrites.
divider credits to the @/saradika-graphics
masterlist
“The one shadowing me to Busan is—”
You duck down, hiding behind the humongous computer screen from your boss, fingers flying across the keyboard furiously acting as if you are working on the report he asked you to rewrite for the 69th time, contrarily the words that display on your screen are not me take anyone else.
In the deep bass voice of his your name is called. Others breathe out in relief knowing they are freebirds for the weekend with no boss tailing behind their ass asking for updates. Because, he will be behind yours, biting off your head. Tears well up in your eyes from sheer frustration as you backspace the words. Manifestation my ass.
He calls out your name again, his shoes click-clacking against the floor. You exit the file in a hurry and open the actual report. He towers over your cubicle, resting his palm on your desk, his black tie dangling beside you, you know if you turn around you will be face to face with his stomach. Too close for you not to dive deep into the gutter filled thoughts. “Did you hear my announcement?”
You plaster the work smile, swirling the chair around a little away from him, maintaining breathable distance and you look at his face, “yes, sir. Six am, sharp. Wait at the office. Done.”
Seungcheol, your boss, eyes you for a minute, his long hair falls into his eyes tired from his continuous running of his fingers through it, making him blink a little harder. You raise your eyebrows at the long unusual silence. He looks at your half done report and back at you. Your left eye twitches at the insinuation behind his single look.
“I’m almost done with the report. I’ll send it to you by EOD.” A blatant lie. It’s already past eight and you are working overtime today too.
He quirks his thick eyebrow, and you press back into your chair, almost curling into yourself. He runs his hand through his perfectly long silky hair, and sighs.
“Wrap up for today. We have early morning tomorrow. I’ll help you with the report.” He knocks your table a couple times and leaves. Before you can understand what just happened, he turns around mumbling, “I’ll pick you up. No need to come to the office.”
He struts back into his cabin. The white shirt perfectly fits his broad shoulders, struggling a little to not tear whenever he raises his arm to mess with his hair. Sometimes, when you are not mad at him for making you work overtime and hog all of your personal life, you want to help the shirt to stay intact by holding his bicep. Then you remember the HR and you are back to hating him.
“He is gonna pick you up?” Jeonghan swivels to your cubicle as soon as your boss is out of earshot.
And then there goes the momentary peace. If your boss is a devil, Jeonghan is no less of a devil incarnate. At least Seungcheol treats everyone equally—like trash (but he pays well therefore why everyone sticks around), while Jeonghan has a special interest in making only your life a hell after one slip of tongue.
“Isn’t this favouritism?” He nudges your shoulder, “maybe you should look out for anonymous complaints against you.”
You pick up a pencil and stab it into his shoulder. He laughs, “now you are even hitting me. What? Just because the boss is backing you up?”
“Backing my ass. He stole my weekend, again, and I have to follow him around a boring conference and take notes.” You suppress the scream in your throat, you still need that paycheck. “You can go instead. You can have all of his attention and be his favorite employee.”
“So, you agree you are his favorite.” Jeonghan grins.
You flip the pencil to the sharper edge, and raise your hand threatening him now. “I’m no one’s favorite.”
“Alright,” he goes back to his cubicle, “one week and we will have the same convo next Friday.”
You throw the stapler at him. It hits his arm and falls down, he retrieves and keeps it. You are back to fighting with him to get your stapler back.
The sun is slowly coming out at six in the morning. The overnight bag sits next to you on the road as you wait for a silver car to roll into your street. You took up the rare opportunity and went home as soon as you won back your stapler from Jeonghan. Seungcheol was still cooped up in his office as you walked past his cabin to the elevator. His tie undone as his eyes went over a file.
The startup Seungcheol built is a tight knit community. He is a boss, acts like one, deadlines need to be met or a one-on-one meeting will be scheduled the next day. You had your meetings with him, he was adamant on knowing the reason behind why work isn’t completed yet. You were near to tears with all of his questioning, he sighed in the third meeting, and you broke down. He patiently sat through the night explaining to you the domain, helping you understand the points you missed earlier.
When the work is done on time, clients’ praises flew in, Seungcheol never missed an opportunity to appreciate his employees. The bonuses came on time despite what state the company is in. He is a kind boss in his own way. That might be the reason you are still sticking around even if you forgot what your personal life looks like anymore. New series? New restaurants? Friends? Dating life? What’s that?
Seungcheol is on the same boat as you, if not, in a more deprived position. You never saw him laugh, or be genuinely happy for anything not related to work. In the entire three years you never saw a girl in his life. You aren’t sure if you should feel sad or happy. He is handsome, stunning and his sturdy body comes into your dreams waking you up sweaty, needy. The crush you have on him only blossoms in your sleep, the only time you allow it to dance around, in reality he is out of your reach. He is Choi Seungcheol and you are just his employee.
The silver car comes to a stop before you, and you tuck away the feelings behind hundreds of reasons why you can’t be with him. He steps out of the car, dressed down in a simple sweatshirt and sweatpants. You blink at him, lips parting and closing shut. He has other clothes than a white shirt and black slacks? He pushes his shades into his hair, picking up your bag, and opening the backseat door.
“Uhm,” you scratch your temple watching him arrange your luggage and slam the door shut. “Good morning?”
He opens the door for you, “good morning.”
You step closer to the car, stealing one glance at his pretty face. He is fixated on watching your step carefully like he is making sure you get on safely. The same look you have seen when he helps you get on the escalator, sometimes offering his hand after you briefly mentioned how scared you are of them.
He closes the door once you are settled in, strapping yourself with the seatbelt. He jogs over to the other side, getting in and changing the destination to Busan on the navigation maps. You sit silently through the drive, hands on your lap, back straight, and eyes on the dog sticker on the car before you. Seungcheol doesn’t say anything for thirty minutes, and your leg starts bouncing at the unbearable silence. Moments like these you hope he wasn’t stuck up and actually chats with you to elevate the awkwardness.
He rests his arm on the window, holding the steering wheel with a single hand and slows down to a stop at a red light. The veins on his arms have you salivating, you shift in your seat sinking back. How dumb are you to agree on a ride with him again after what happened last time? That night comes to your vision, the low lights hung in the bar, one drink down, a hand on his lap and his face inches away.
You shake the vision away, look out the window and see a puppy hanging out of the car window next to yours. A pretty pink bow sits on top of its head, staring right back at you. You wave your hand excitedly, mimicking its tilt of head.
Seungcheol chuckles behind you, startling you. For a brief moment you forgot that he is right next to you. The dimples make a rare appearance, the twinkle in his black eyes makes your heart skip a beat. Those damn eyes. They are the reason you had a slip of tongue with Jeonghan, you commented on how beautiful they are during a meeting while Seungcheol was unhappy with the quarter reports. Jeonghan didn’t forget the comment, and you are damn sure it will be the first thing he says after waking up from a deep slumber upon seeing you.
“You love dogs?” He finally breaks the suffocating silence. You thank the unseen forces for shifting the moment to a little bearable.
“Yeah,” you answer. Cars start to slowly move forward. You wave bye at the dog watching it drive away into a different lane. “I love them.”
“Do you have one?”
“God, no. I can barely look after myself, a dog in the equation is just gonna kill me and the poor dog.” You hold onto your seatbelt absentmindedly, trailing the fingers up and down. “But one day,” you say wishfully, “I am gonna have a dog. Me, my boyfriend and our dog, a perfect little family.”
Seungcheol sucks in a deep breath, both of his hands coming to the steering wheel. He swears at the car that has been trying to overtake us for the last ten minutes. Silence blankets the car again, he doesn’t even try to look at your face or strike up any conversation. Did you say anything wrong? He was smiling in an adorable way with his beautiful dimples just a few seconds ago.
You steal a glance at him, heart twisting a little, sadness taking over, he is this close, within arms reach and yet you can’t do anything about it. The simulations consume your mind, what ifs, what if you were just a stranger who met him and somehow fell in love, his hand would be in yours now, and his sinful lips in all the places that have been aching for him.
The dream ends, and you turn away from him. He is your boss and you are his employee. There’s a fine line and he made sure he wouldn’t cross it, then or now. He didn’t that night and what will make him do it now? Nothing has changed.
“Only one room has been booked, sir.” The receptionist's voice quivers repeating his answer one more time to your angry boss. “I can show you the booking if you want.”
“That’s fine.” His leveled voice cuts through the thick tension, “book me one more room. Any room.”
The receptionist licks his lips, his customer friendly smile wavering a little. “I’m sorry, sir. We are completely booked due to a festival happening nearby.”
Seungcheol raps his knuckles on the counter, the frown lines on his forehead have you and the receptionist take a step back. The flames emanating from his body can start a fire, and spread its wild wings everywhere. Does he hate sharing a room with you that bad? It offends you, not that you are ecstatic to be in the same room as him, alone, among the privacy of four walls.
No, you shake your head, as if it’ll help you to throw away the dangerous thoughts. He doesn’t even like to be in the same vicinity as you, how can you expect to be cuddly in the same bed. The vision of his arms and body curling just right into the shape of your body makes you stumble a step back. You slap your cheek to shake away the dreadful illusion.
Seungcheol startles at the loud slap. He ducks down to your face, his big eyes on your stinging cheek, “are you okay? What’s wrong? Why did you hit yourself?”
Your cheeks warm at the proximity. “Nothing. I thought a mosquito was flying around.”
“Sorry, mam, but we don’t have any flies or parasites in our prestigious hotel. We take a one hundred percent—”
Seungcheol clenches his jaw, turning around to the receptionist after pressing your hand in a comforting squeeze. “You don’t have anything. Which hotel doesn’t have rooms?”
“A popular one.” You help out the poor boy who is back to sniffling. “Sir, we are nearing the conference time. I think we have to,” you clear your throat, gesturing your hand at the idle room keycard on the counter.
Seungcheol stares at the key card for a second, tapping his fingers on the marble counter. You and the receptionist hold your breath awaiting on what he is gonna decide, is it to share a night with you or wreck havoc. He is capable of both. And you are scared of those two choices. You can’t spend an entire night with him and not fall deeper into the pit hole named Choi Seungcheol. On the other hand you aren’t confident that you can stop a fight once Seungcheol starts it. He is scary when he is angry.
For the sake of the safety of the people, he grabs the key card, shouldering his duffle bag, and taking yours into his hand. “Let’s go.”
You dumbly follow him, hands idle due to the lack of your heavy luggage. It’s only a night and two days trip, the thousand what ifs scenarios has you packing the extra clothes, a lint roller just in case you see a puppy and the lack of self control will lead to fur being all over you, extra chargers, tons of your skin care and god, now thinking about it you might have packed half of your room.
The bag in his hands looks lightweight, there’s no heaving, or short breaks between the counter and the elevator. He doesn’t stop or even shift the bag from one hand to another. You admire his strength, slowly taking in the veins on his hand, half hidden by the sweatshirt sleeve but you take what you receive.
The broadness of his back, and how he guides you over, pressing the elevator button for you and patiently waits, everything intensifies what you feel towards him. The wistful feeling of wanting more comes back a hundred times stronger.
He presses the nine button once you get in the elevator. Foreigners saunter in behind you, talking in a different language, wearing flower bands around their head and around their necks. You curiously look over them thinking over the words of the scaredy receptionist. A festival? The region's special food stalls, the events, unending shows of local artists, and all the fun moving from one stall to another trying out the arcades makes you sigh. Why are you working on a weekend again?
With a small smile the foreigners exit on the sixth floor leaving silence behind them. Seungcheol steps in next to you, watching the numbers go up on the display. If you came to the conference with anyone else you would have mustered up the courage to ask to check the festival for at least an hour. You look over at him once, and the words just stick to your mouth. Not with him.
The elevator doors open wide with a ding you follow behind him as he checks for the room number. He presses the key card, twisting the door knob, opening to a huge room enough to accommodate five people easily. You gasp, a new hop in your feet as you rush past him to the wide windows overlooking the city.
The festival is really a few blocks away. The cars are jammed at the parking lot. People are swarming the place looking like ants. The tents line up one side, you believe the food must be to die for. Your stomach grumbles at the sad realization that you won’t get to taste any of it.
“We need to hurry. Or else we will be swamped by the traffic.” Seungcheol joins next to you, void of the bags, dragging his sleeves up his arms.
You peel yourself off the window regretfully. “Yes, sir.”
He turns away from the hubbub of the city to you, carefully watching you just the way he does whenever someone’s presenting during a meeting. You school your expression into a professional one, stamping down on your disappointment and other bubbling feelings on Choi Seungcheol.
No words are exchanged. You bow your head one last time and make your way towards the bag he carefully placed near a table. The conference starts in an hour, and Seungcheol is right about the traffic, you need to hurry so you won’t be tardy. Grabbing your clothes, you rush into the bathroom. You catch a last glimpse of the man, his back turned towards you, and his hands balled into fists.
He does hate sharing space with you. Good thing that that night you didn’t dare to cross the line. Either of you.
“Remember Joshua?” Seungcheol steps aside to let you meet the man of the conference.
Joshua from Hong Holdings, extends his arm accepting yours in a firm handshake. His big palm dwarfs your small hand. Despite his gentle demeanour and the moon crescent eye smile, you feel a little intimidated, especially the presentation he delivered, and the aura surrounding him.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you. Or anyone from the Choi’s.” Joshua retracts his hand, buttoning his suit jacket. “Only heard great things.”
You muster up the professional smile, bowing your head a little, “all credit goes to the boss. A team is nothing without its leader.”
Seungcheol’s cheeks turn the lightest shade of red. Joshua chuckles, agreeing to you. You grip onto your notepad and pen, dying to steal another glance at the pretty smile your boss is adorning. Joshua has already seen you looking lovingly at him once, you aren’t sure you can do it twice.
“True.” Joshua pats your boss’ shoulder, “Our Cheol is the smartest and most loyal man out there.”
Our Cheol?
Seungcheol slaps his arm away, glaring. “Shut up.”
Joshua snickers. “Oh,” he notices the confusion on your face, “we are friends. Since high school? I can’t remember.”
Now your boss gives you some attention. A soft smile on his pretty pink lips, the warmth in his eyes, a new development that you are loving, and most importantly the suit. He looks ravishing like a model on a runway. The entire conference you noticed the attention he has been receiving, fellow CEOs, directors and all of them being women.
Joshua clears this throat and you snap out of your haze, breaking away eye contact with Seungcheol. Alarms blare inside your head, wreaking havoc, a single word flashing in red. HR. HR. HR.
“Should we go get dinner?” Seungcheol thankfully diverts the cheeky smile Joshua has been giving you towards the buffet.
You trail behind them, head dropped, berating yourself for letting your feelings slip. How can you still be living and reliving that night? He clearly has moved on. He just sees you as his employee now. Nothing more.
You look up, after making up your mind, he is standing there with a plate, meeting your eyes.
—
You glare at the obvious problem staring back at you. One innocent bed. Two professional colleagues. Seungcheol rubs the back of his neck standing beside you.
You wring your hands in anxiety. With the busy day you had, rushing to the conference, following him around while he softly snips the flirtatious comments from his admirer (you were putting a fist to their jaw in your mind), dinner with Joshua, and now at eleven in the night you are standing in the room, you forgot about the glaring situation, one bed.
“I’ll take the couch.” You are quick to put your handbag and phone on the couch before he can even retaliate. “Ah,” you beeline to your bag, “need to freshen up.”
“I—”
You are closing the bathroom door on his face before he can say anything. Hand on your heart you lean against the door, your face warm, and heart in your throat. Sharing a room, almost a bed with him, god, you should’ve joined him earlier in retaliation to the hotel staff.
You glance back at the closed door, and think about the man on the other side, the longing comes back, if only you two were in different situations.
Waking up from the dream, you make a move to turn the shower on.
Seungcheol is on laptop, glasses perched on his nose, eyebrows drawn in concentration as he types away. You shuffle across the room, shoving your necessities bag in and taking out your skin care products bag.
“I completed the report.” Seungcheol’s deep voice causes a shiver down your spine.
You fumble with the cap of a tube, “oh. I could have done it now.”
He shrugs, closing his laptop and stares at your wet hair, the water droplets wetting your thin pyjamas shirt. He smiles at the bear prints on your white shirt, and as if he is jolted awake he snaps his eyes away. He grabs his clothes hastily and disappears into the still steam filled bathroom. You hear a groan before he closes the door.
His mixed signs have you going crazy. One moment he looks at you like a lover looks at his girl, another moment you are nothing but his employee. Should you confront him?
You drop your cream into your lap, shoulders dropping, confront him what? He is your boss and you’ll be one anonymous complaint away from being jobless. Wait, is there a rule prohibiting dating among colleagues or is it just Jeonghan messing with your head as usual?
How could you already jump to dating when he doesn’t even properly address you? No man will wait a year for a girl. He must have moved on.
You cap your cream tube, throwing it back into the bag remembering the girls surrounding him. This is driving you crazy. How can you let a man make you lose your mind? You are better than this. You can live without him or anyone.
With the new resolution, you lay down on the uncomfortable couch, angling your neck in a way you are one hundred percent sure you're gonna have a stiff neck by tomorrow morning. After the long hard day you go through the missed texts, your left eye twitching at one particular text.
Kissed yet?
-annoying asshole
The bathroom door opens before you can reply to Jeonghan, revealing Seungcheol only in a white tank top, his face still wet from the damp hair. You drop your phone onto your chest watching him walk around the room, stuffing his bag, and hanging out his suit for the next day.
He bends down, picking up a dropped article, he, god, you see a tattoo peeking out on his back. He turns around, closing the closet door, eyes narrowing at the sudden silence, and as if he can read the room his gaze lands on you.
You should look away, maintain dignity, give him space to be comfortable without feeling violated, and be professional. Why is he your boss again? There are other jobs you can always try.
The phone on your chest pings, and you break away from the trance. He tilts his head, is that a tiny smirk or are your eyes playing tricks on you? You stumble unlocking your phone, entering the wrong pin multiple times.
“Please take the bed.” He is now standing next to you, by your thighs. “I’m uncomfortable seeing your,” he gestures towards your sure to ache neck angle, “you can’t sleep like that.”
His sweatpants brush against your bare skin. You try tugging down your shorts, he clenches his jaw, his eyes never leaving your face. Oh.
“Neither can you, sir.” You turn to your side, wincing, and you mask it up quickly with a smile. “I can’t let you sleep on the couch.”
He hears the finality in your words, moves to the bed, turning off the lights. “Why can’t you join me in the bed?” He asks after a beat of silence.
Hundred images of your forbidden dreams slam into your head. You can’t believe you heard what he just asked you. It’s not the invitation you have in your mind, you know he just wants you two to sleep on your own sides, in an innocent way.
“That if your comfortable. You don’t seem to let me take the couch. And I can’t let you sleep there. If your boyfriend,”
You cut him off, frowning in the dark. “What boyfriend?” Professionalism what?
Seungcheol shifts around the bed, the comforter rustling, “you did mention you, your boyfriend and your dog earlier. I assume you have a boyfriend.”
“Uh, I barely have time to sleep, where can I find a boyfriend?” You rest your hands beneath your cheek staring at the dark silhouette on the bed. “Until I find one in our office.” Shut up, please. “Not that I’m actively looking,” kill me “I mean,” you laugh awkwardly, “well, you know what I mean. I’m either at the office or at home.”
He doesn’t say anything. Why isn’t he talking? How can he be silent when you rambled your heart out? Where is minimum courtesy to reply? Wait, is he sleeping? You crane your neck trying to listen to his breathing.
“My bad.” He replies, after what feels like an eternity. “I shouldn’t have assumed.”
“No issues, sir.”
“Please sleep on the bed.”
“I.. can’t.”
“Why?”
You don’t trust yourself, for starters. “How can a man and a..”
He clicks his tongue, “that’s nonsense. I won’t be,” he trails off, “I won’t be anywhere near you. If that’s what’s worrying you.”
“I can’t guarantee you that I won’t be all over you.” You should really learn how to shut the fuck up.
He inhales sharply. You laugh it off. “I’m just playing around.”
“Get in the bed, please.” You watch him turn towards you, even the outline of his body is gorgeous.
“How can a—”
He calls your name, and you hum. “Grow up and get in the damn bed.”
Startled, you blink at him. He rarely raises his voice, when someone messes up at work or during his particular moody hours. Never once did he use that tone with you, even Jeonghan was a victim, but never you.
You shouldn’t get triggered. It’s not your place to retort or get on his nerves on purpose. He pays your salary, he is your boss.
“Why do you want me in bed so badly, huh?”
The room falls silent before you are scrambling off the couch, and Seungcheol reaches to you mid way, his arms circling your waist, and your hands finally finding home in his still damp hair. The years worth of wanting, pining and crushing on him is answered with a kiss.
Your insides lit up, meeting his soft yet cracked lips, you close your eyes, enjoying the way his hands tug you closer to his body, angling his head to the side, opening his lips and you answer with your own, inviting his tongue, twirling around with it, you tug on his hair, a moan spilling into his mouth. He groans back, his hand trailing down to your thigh, squeezing it hard.
“Seungcheol,” you break the kiss, panting, his breath hits your lips, still hovering, lips still brushing against yours.
He hums, his hand now pressing into your ass. “God,” his lips gently pull your lower lip, sucking and biting as if he can’t decide if he wants to be gentle or be rough with you.
“These lips,” he licks your lips, you fall onto the bed, your knees giving up, he chuckles, trailing behind you, “these goddamn lips.” He hovers over you, pressing his lips against yours, his knee resting between your legs, grazing ever so slightly into your core whenever he moves, enjoying the tiny moans you slip feeling him.
“I should’ve kissed you that night.” He confesses between littering tiny kisses on your face, your eyes, cheeks, and lips. You laugh at how he finds your lips every few seconds, like he is obsessed with them. “When I thought you had a boyfriend, god,” he nips at your lip, a stinging sensation leaves you squirming and his leg perfectly placed that had you closing your eyes and groaning, the restraint in you breaking, the need for relief making you restless.
“I hated myself for letting you slip away. Right through my fingers. The entire day when I look at you and the regret of not being a man and confessing to you that night killed me.” He bites your neck, you whine his name, he hums, enjoying you being a putty in his hands. “I can’t want you, and yet I do.” He pulls your hands above your head, pinning them, “I want you.” His thigh presses into your core helping you find a little relief, and just when you begin to remember how to move against him, he moves his leg away.
“Cheol, please,” you beg, “please.”
His mouth curves up against your chest, he tugs your oversized T-shirt down, his teeth sinking into your chest. “Please what?”
You try to move to find his thick thigh and help yourself, he clicks his tongue, pulling you to the side by your thigh and slapping your ass. You cry at the stinging pain his hand left behind you.
“Please what?” He repeats.
You push him away, crawling back to your couch, angry that he is making you beg despite knowing what you need from him. He grabs your leg, dragging you down onto the bed, pressing himself on top of you, caging you.
“Where do you think you are going?” He nips your ear, hand slipping beneath your shirt, feeling you shiver against him. “You are not leaving until you ask what you want.”
“You,” you mumble, eyes fluttering shut from his fingers caressing the edge of your bra. He trails to the clip, freeing you, and slipping his finger beneath the cloth. You curve into his back, shaking your head, he presses his face next to you, locking your movements. “Please. I want you.”
The alarm blares waking you up from the deep slumber, you twist around, your entire body aching. His hand is around your waist, his face pressed into your neck, and his legs tangled with yours.
Your stomach flutters remembering last night, your loud moans, his groans, and his skin against yours. How his eyes lit up seeing you come undone beneath him, how he leaned into your palm as you cupped his cheek. The unsaid confession lingering in the air, and now, you are scared of what might happen. Is he going to treat you as a one night stand?
You turn around in his arms, facing him, your heart giddy from being able to see him this close, in your arms. His hair falls onto his face, his long eyelashes make any girl jealous, and his red swollen lips are parted as he puffs out breaths.
The same man who looks devastatingly handsome in suit and tie, ready to bite off anyone’s head given chance, is now sleeping so innocently in your arms. The irony of the situation makes you smile. He twists around, now laying on his stomach, arm still around you.
The tattoo on his back is now clearer under the light and void of his clothes. You trail your fingers across the tree, around the shape of his tattoo, beautiful. You press a kiss on it, one kiss turns into two and then three, maybe you are as obsessed as him with kisses.
You hear him chuckle, he is awake, now, looking at you, slowly blinking, still in the process of waking up. Your cheeks warm, suddenly shy, realising everything is happening in reality and not in your dream. He is finally in your arms, smiling, looking at you with love.
“Morning.” He puckers his lips, you laugh, complying into his soft demand, kissing him.
His head falls back onto the pillow with a satisfied smile and crescent eye smile. Why is he so cute? You lean in pressing one last kiss. His hand lowers from your waist to your ass, you whine from the ache.
He pouts, this fucker acting as if he wasn’t the one who inflicted the pain. “Hurting?”
You scoff, glaring at him. “Whose fault is that?”
He shrugs, smiling cheekily.
Second alarms go off, breaking the tranquility. He groans into your chest, hiding. “Uhm we have to leave for the conference.” You pat his back.
He shakes his head, nuzzling deeper into your skin. Your heart threatens to explode at his acts. “Five more minutes.”
You hum, running your fingers through his hair. “So, how are we going about with this?”
“You are my girlfriend and I’m your boyfriend.”
“And my boss.”
He comes out of his hiding. “Oh.”
“Yes. Oh.”
“And your boss.” He grins, “and also your—”
You press your finger on his lips. “Those terms are only for when we..”
“Only when we fuck?”
You shove him. “Who are you? What happened to the man I fell for?”
“Not funny.” He pouts. “That’s not how you treat your boss.”
You huff at his audacity. “Then what’s your hand doing?”
He grins, squeezing your chest one last time. “Oops.”
Third alarm sets in. “Final call. We have to hurry now.”
He kisses your cheek, “how about we go to the festival after the conference?”
You squeal, throwing your hands around your boyfriend and slamming him down onto the bed.
♡ pairing: choi seungcheol x gn!reader
♡ theme: x-files au
♡ wc: 8.2k
♡ warnings: none
♡ a/n: started rewatching the x-files recently and the idea of this popped into my head so i simply had to write it!! also, y/ln refers to ‘your last name’ bc ya know. agent stuff.
‧₊˚✩彡 moodboard by @myhimbomingi ‧₊˚✩彡
When you joined the FBI you didn’t expect to end up working in the basement with a peculiar agent obsessed with all things extraterrestrial, but your new assignment is certainly taking you places you’ve never been before.
10 September 1993
Washington, D.C.
taptaptap
The light knocking on your desk pulls your focus away from the almost-completed report on the screen of your monitor. Most would call report writing the boring part of the job, and while you don’t necessarily disagree your high levels of attentiveness allow you to efficiently plug away at the otherwise mind-numbing task - so, you don’t mind it so much. That is, unless you are interrupted.
“Hey Frenchie, the Bergmeister wants to see you.”
Stifling a sigh, you look up at your bothersome coworker, Soonyoung, who is currently leaning over your desk while eating a sandwich. You grimace as you see the multitude of crumbs he’s managed to drop all over your paperwork in the five seconds he’s been standing there.
“What does he want?” you ask, not bothering to hide your annoyance.
“Didn’t say,” he mumbles through the large bite he just stuffed into his mouth.
The Bergmeister is the inane moniker Soonyoung and his pals call your supervisor, Assistant Director Bergman, behind his back. Frenchie is the irritating nickname nearly half the office now calls you, to your face, due to an unfortunate incident involving French dressing and the light gray pantsuit you chose to wear on your very first day on the job. You figured they’d get tired of it after a few days, but that was several weeks ago at this point - and much to your chagrin it seems to have stuck.
You give Soonyoung a very obviously fake grin to accompany your obviously sarcastic response. “Thank you, Agent Soonyoung - helpful as always.”
Soonyoung winks at you. “For you? Anytime.” You imagine grabbing his sandwich and bopping it on his head.
The muted sounds of landlines ringing, keyboards clacking, and fax machines whirring drift past your ears as you walk steadily to Bergman’s office, maintaining a false air of confidence as to mask your anxiety. You’ve never been called into his office alone in the two months you’ve worked for the FBI - you quickly leaf through your mind for anything you’ve done that could be a potential mistake, but you come up empty handed.
Bergman’s door is ajar - you rap your knuckle against it twice as you step inside. He peers up at you through thick, round lenses.
“You wanted to see me, sir?”
“Yes, come in, have a seat - and shut the door behind you.”
The heavy door closes with a deep thunk. As you lower yourself into the chair facing the desk you notice you’re joined by a man you’ve never seen before. He says nothing, but looms in the corner of the room, smoking a cigarette.
“I’ll spare you the bullshit, Y/ln,” Bergman starts. He looks more tired than usual. “Have you heard of the bureau’s division known as the ‘x-files’?”
You feel your normally stoic face contort into a confused expression. Whatever you were expecting him to say, it wasn’t that.
“Well, yes, sir… but isn’t that an unofficial department?”
He takes a sip from his styrofoam cup of coffee. “Correct - it’s not official, but I assure you it is very much a ‘functional’ operation.” He all but rolls his eyes at functional.
You shoot a glance at the unintroduced man in the corner, but he remains expressionless. Bergman continues.
“I’m sure by now you’re well aware of the reputation surrounding this subsect and its…proprietor, shall we say.”
You give a single nod. By your second day in the office you’d heard all about the x-files: cases allegedly involving aliens, the supernatural, and all sorts of nonsense you chalked up to pure baloney. You’d also learned of the lone employee who spearheads the whole operation from the bureau basement: Agent Choi. Nobody seems to take him, or it, seriously - so much so that you had begun to doubt if it was even a real department, and if Choi even existed. But apparently, the rumors were true.
“I am not at liberty to discuss the reasons behind this decision,” Bergman tells you, “but all you need to know is that this assignment is significant in nature.”
Assignment?? Surely he doesn’t mean…
“I’m not sure I understand,” you ask hesitantly, “am I-”
“Being assigned to the x-files? Yes.”
Your stomach lurches. You open your mouth to inquire what exactly it is you’ve done wrong, but clearly he anticipated this exact response.
“This is not a punishment - though I certainly know why it might seem that way. But, it’s imperative that we receive reliable insight into the operations of this endeavor.”
You sit there in silence for a few seconds, dumbfounded. “So, you’re asking me to spy on Agent Choi.”
Bergman waves his hand dismissively. “Yes, yes, I know how this sounds. And essentially - yes, you will be our eyes and ears into this otherwise elusive project. Choi will know we’re sending you there to report back to us, but we don’t care. We are confident you will succeed in providing us with useful information.”
You wait for him to go on, to elaborate in any capacity, but apparently he’s finished.
“Alright then, so when do I-”
“Immediately,” Bergman interjects. You purse your lips, trying to hide your displeasure.
“Yes sir,” you reply as respectfully as you can muster.
“Great. We’re counting on you, Y/ln.” You glance once more at the smoking man in the corner, but he remains silent.
“Dismissed.”
You walk out of Bergman’s office, still trying to process what the fuck just happened. You have the misfortune of passing Soonyoung’s desk on the way back to yours - he opens his mouth, clearly about to say something annoying again, but you briskly zoom past him before he can get a word out. You make a beeline for your desk, grabbing only your purse and coffee cup before heading toward the elevator.
X-files, here I come, I fucking guess.
—-
Your eyes take a few seconds to adjust as you step into the dim basement. The elevator doesn’t come down to this level - you spent a good ten minutes trying to locate the correct stairwell that would even bring you here. You make your way through a seemingly endless hallway of dusty filing cabinets, forgotten boxes, and broken computers before you find yourself in front of a nondescript door, not quite shut - the only thing signifying that you’ve arrived at your destination being the makeshift paper name plate with S. Choi written in ink. You raise your fist to knock but before you can do so you hear a voice call out from inside.
“Come in.”
You push the door in, its hinges giving you a high-pitched squeeeeak as it opens. You make a mental note to find some WD-40.
The sad excuse for an office is equally dim-lit as the hallway, but it’s a sight to behold: a desk at the center of the room - neat, but stacked with newspapers and case files, a small lamp lighting up the open file in the desk’s center; a bookshelf nearly reaching the ceiling, overflowing with books on seemingly every topic under the sun; archival boxes stacked as tall as the numerous filing cabinets, which are also topped with more boxes; a massive bulletin board filled with articles and photos; but most notably, pinned the wall, is a poster featuring a flying saucer, accompanied with the text I WANT TO BELIEVE.
In the bizarre room sits a dark-haired man typing at his computer, his back to you.
“I presume you heard me coming,” you state.
“From a mile away,” he replies, still typing.
You wait for him to turn around, say hello, anything - but the clickclack of his keyboard continues.
Several seconds pass, but the man says nothing. Apparently, it’s on you to break the silence.
You sigh under your breath. “I’m Agent Y/ln, I’ve been-”
“Assigned to the x-files to spy on me?” he interrupts, eyes still glued to the monitor.
“They told me you’d know that,” you admit.
The typing stops. Choi turns around, the heavy desk chair giving an unpleasant creak as he leans his elbow over its back, finally facing you. His appearance takes you by surprise: strong eyebrows, plump red lips, soft dark-brown eyes - you weren’t expecting to find such a handsome face attached to the man with a reputation for being a “crazy UFO freak”, in the words of your coworkers. He’s much younger than you anticipated too, around your age - and seemingly so… normal. His eyes do a quick scan of your figure - his expression barely changes, but a quick flash of interest tells you you’re not exactly what he expected either. It is extinguished almost immediately.
“Yeah, well, it wouldn’t be the first time.” His tone is passive, but you detect a hint of somberness in his words. His warm eyes lock onto yours.
“Name’s Choi, but I’m sure you already knew that. You can call me Seungcheol, though.” If it was anyone else, you’d think it was flirtatious in nature - but you can tell that was not his intention.
“Okay. Well, Choi, what exactly am I to do here?”
An eager grin lights up his face. He rises from his chair, grabs a case file off the pile on his desk, and opens it - throwing it back down onto the desk, facing you.
“I’m so glad you asked.”
You quickly skim the details: a series of disappearances in a small town, all teenagers. So far, no bodies have been found. Local law enforcement has compiled a list of suspects, but they don’t seem to have many leads.
“Okay, so we have a potential serial killer.”
Choi shakes his head. “That’s what the local police think. Which seems reasonable, unless you’re familiar with the location.”
You glance back at the file. Spirit Lake, Iowa.
“Never heard of it.”
“It’s a known UFO hotspot. Sightings have been reported for decades, most notably in 1967 when there were three different sightings - one of which was caught on camera by two different witnesses.”
He hands you a stack of old polaroids. You flip through the grainy photographs, which all appear to showcase an ambiguous but distinct saucer-shaped object in the night sky.
You stare at your new partner. “Choi, this could be anything. Most so-called UFO ‘sightings’ are nothing more than aircraft that are very much from Earth.”
“The U.S. Weather Service officially stated that it was a weather balloon, however no weather balloons were launched within 500 miles that day. There were also no flights - civilian or military - on record for the area that night.”
“And have you considered that this could all just be a hoax?”
“Sure, it could be. But what if I told you that in 1967 there were also three recorded disappearances, all coinciding with the UFO sightings?”
He hands you a separate case file on the 1967 disappearances. All of the cases are closed, as the three who went missing eventually turned up again - unable to account for what happened to them, but otherwise unharmed.
You close the file, setting it on the desk. “So let me get this straight: you think these people were all abducted by aliens. And you think the exact same scenario is happening again, this year?”
“There have been three recent UFO sightings in the area reported, and we have three missing teens. It all matches up.”
You stand there in silence, at a loss for words. Guess everyone was right, you think to yourself. The man is insane.
“Okay, let’s say you’re right,” you finally respond. “How exactly are we supposed to contribute here? Looks like they’ve already exhausted all leads. Why the hell do we need to fly out to Iowa?”
Choi gives a knowing smile. “They found the first girl this morning. Alive. Barely remembers anything, but unharmed.”
“And you want to go catch some little green men.”
“Actually, ‘little green men’ is a misconception - known encounters have widely reported extraterrestrials to be gray-skinned and not that much smaller than us. But anyway, more or less - yes, we’ll be in search of evidence that alien life is making contact with humanity.”
You stand there in disbelief. So this is where you’ve ended up - in the basement with a madman on a wild goose chase. As you’re thinking about quitting on the spot, Choi goes back to his computer.
“Anyway I’ll get us booked for the first flight out of here tomorrow morning,” he informs as he resumes his typing. “Want me to pick you up?
“No, that’s quite alright.”
“Suit yourself.”
You wait for him to say something further, but he doesn’t. You turn to leave. As you approach the doorway you hear the creaking of his chair once more. Looking back, Choi is facing you.
“It’s nice to meet you, Agent Y/ln.”
His expression is sincere. You may be stuck with a madman, but at least he’s not a complete asshole.
“Nice to meet you, too.”
You feel Choi’s eyes follow you as you exit the room.
—
11 September 1993
Spirit Lake, Iowa
The gravel driveway crunches loudly as the rental car slows to a stop. Your partner shuts off the ignition and turns to face you, his left hand still resting on the wheel.
“Ready?”
You glare back at him. “You’re acting like this is my first case, Choi. I’ve done this before.”
You open your door and exit the car before he can reply. You’ve barely gotten started on this investigation, but he’s already on your nerves.
You approach the cottage-style house and ring the bell. A disgruntled-looking woman in her 40s opens the door.
“Mrs. Miller? I’m Agent Choi, and this is my partner Agent Y/ln.” You both raise your badges. “We’re here to speak with Alexandra, may we come inside?”
Mrs. Miller practically scowls at you. “She’s already spoken to the cops three times, leave us alone.” The door slams shut in your face.
You and Choi shoot a look at each other. You hear a voice shouting inside, followed by loud arguing. The door reopens to a young girl, high-school age, with jet black dyed hair, heavy eyeliner, and a nose ring.
“Ignore my mom, she’s a huge bitch,” the girl says as she steps outside, slamming the door behind her. She marches past you. “I’ll talk to you, let’s walk.”
Choi raises his eyebrows at you as he turns to follow the girl. You join him.
“You must be Alexandra,” he says to the girl, who is still walking.
“Alex,” she corrects. The girl finally stops, turning around to face you. “Are you going to take me seriously or are you just going to laugh in my face like the cops did?”
“I believe you,” your partner assures her.
The girl turns to you, arms crossed. “I take it you’re the skeptic then?” Before you can respond she continues. “Trust me, I am too. I’ve always heard all the stories growing up about the abductions in this town, but I thought it was all bullshit. But I don’t know how else to explain what happened to me.”
“Can you start from the beginning?” Choi asks.
The girl sighs. “Yeah, sure. I was driving home from my friend Becky’s house, by myself. It was pretty late, like around 9pm. I was on Campbell Road, I had just passed the old schoolhouse. It was dark as shit and nobody else was around. Then suddenly there was this crazy bright light, it was all around me and I couldn’t see anything. I remember slamming on my breaks, but I don’t know what happened after that. I don’t know how long I was out, but I do remember waking up a few times and I swear I was in some like laboratory or something. I was laying down but I couldn’t move - I could just barely make out some figures standing over me. Then, next thing I know I’m walking down the road again, right where I was driving. No fucking clue how I got there. A deputy found me and took me to the hospital. They told me I was gone for six days. I had to talk to the cops like a hundred times, but there was nothing else wrong with me so they sent me home. And now everybody thinks I’m fucking crazy.”
“Nobody believes you, then,” your partner empathizes.
“The cops think I’m lying and that I ran off with my ‘boyfriend’ for a week,” she scoffs. “I don’t even have a boyfriend. But of course that’s what my mom believes now, so now I’m fucking grounded.”
“I’m sorry,” Choi tells her sincerely.
“Do you have any connections to the others who have gone missing?” you ask.
Alex shrugs. “I mean, we all go to school with each other, but I don’t really know them.”
Choi finds a piece of paper and a pen in his jacket pocket and scribbles something on it, then hands it to the girl.
“This is where we’re staying, if you remember anything else give us a call.”
On the drive back, Choi appears to make a wrong turn.
“You were supposed to go left,” you tell him.
He shakes his head. “I want to check out the location where Alex was taken from.”
“Why?” you ask, “There’s nothing there. When they found the car they towed it.”
“Just want to check it out.”
You can tell you’re not going to get any further answers out of him, so you just sit there in silence, listening to whatever is on the local radio playing quietly in the background. Your stomach starts to rumble, so you glance at the clock: 4:54pm. No wonder, you think to yourself. You hadn’t stopped for lunch, so you were well overdue for a meal. You made a mental note to look out for restaurants on the way back.
“There’s the schoolhouse,” Choi points out a few minutes later. “We must be close.”
The sound of static fills the car as the radio cuts out. You fiddle with the knob, trying to find something else, but nothing is coming in. Guess we’re out of range.
Suddenly, the car goes silent as the engine dies. You’ve barely rolled to a stop when your partner jumps out of the car and starts running back the way you came.
“Where the hell are you going??” you shout after him. No response. With a sigh you exit the car as well. You see him standing in the road, looking at the ground. He turns as he hears you coming, pointing down to the road.
“See the tire marks? This must be where Alex hit the brakes.”
You look at the ground to see the black marks, indicating a car had braked abruptly.
“Our car shut off right as we passed this exact spot,” he says excitedly, jogging back to the rental car. As you follow, you hear him trying the ignition a few times, until the car finally turns back on.
“Look,” he commands as you re-enter the passenger seat. He points to the digital clock on the dashboard: 5:11pm. “What time do you have?”
You glance at your watch: 4:56pm.
“Many instances of alien activity result in residual electromagnetic fields. It’s often been reported that those visiting such sites will experience ‘missing time’, a phenomenon we appear to have just experienced.”
The look on his face is energized - borderline excited. You stare back at him, unenthused.
“Choi, just because my watch is wrong doesn’t mean we time traveled.”
“Then why did the car turn off in this exact spot?”
“It’s a machine, cars malfunction sometimes,” you respond, nearly exasperated. “You’re trying to connect dots that aren’t even here.”
“These events happening in tandem indicate that something abnormal is going on here, Y/ln. You’re choosing to ignore substantial evidence.”
“Oh my god,” you mumble, holding your head in your hands.
Choi shifts the car into drive and makes a u-turn. “Let’s get something to eat.”
“That’s the first reasonable thing you’ve said all day.”
He smiles, but says nothing.
On the drive back into town, you subtly watch him out of the corner of your eye. He drives in silence, but you can tell he’s deep in thought - about what, who knows. Despite his ridiculous antics and asinine beliefs, you admit that his passion is oddly inspiring. You find yourself starting to grow fond of your new partner for some strange, inexplicable reason.
You push that thought to the back of your mind.
—
13 September 1993
“Can you hand me the Ramos case file?”
You look around for the requested file, to no avail. You joined Choi in his motel room early in the morning to review case files, which is proving to be incredibly difficult as he is apparently one to haphazardly leave shit all over the room while he is working.
You finally locate the folder and toss it over to him. “You know, this might be easier if the entire place wasn’t an absolute disaster zone.”
“I like to call it organized chaos,” he says proudly.
It has been six days since the second kid, Mark Ramos, disappeared - and Choi is convinced that he’ll be “returned” today, given that Alex was found after the same amount of time. So, much to your displeasure he planned for you two to stake out the location where he was last seen: the parking lot of the gas station corner store where the boy works.
“Wow, that sounds enthralling,” you told him, deeply sarcastically.
As you are wrapping up prepping for the stakeout, the landline on the nightstand rings.
Your partner reaches and grabs the phone, stretching the cord across the room and placing the receiver between his ear and his shoulder as he continues working.
“Choi,” he answers curtly.
You hear a muffled voice on the other end utter a few sentences before he stops what he’s doing. A tired look washes over his face.
“God fucking dammit. Alright, thanks.” He slams the phone back onto the base.
“They just found the kid. We missed it.”
You’re secretly relieved that you don’t have to go sit in a car for hours now, but you keep that to yourself. He’s clearly peeved, and although you’ve never witnessed his bad side you’re discerning enough to know that you don’t want to be on it.
“I’m sorry,” you say finally.
To your surprise, he walks over to the bed - where you’re sitting - and plops down onto it, holding his head in his hands.
You sit there awkwardly in silence for a few moments, not knowing what to do.
“Are you okay?” you finally ask.
Your partner sighs. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just thought we had this one.”
You feel the urge to ask the question that’s been on the back of your mind since you met him, but he seems really dejected - and you don’t want to upset him. Fuck it, you decide.
“Can I ask you something?”
He lifts his head up, resting his chin on his interlaced hands as he looks over at you.
“Sure,” he answers. You find yourself starting to get lost in his big brown eyes, but you force yourself to snap out of it.
“Why are you so obsessed with aliens? I mean - it seems like more than just an interest for you. It seems… personal, almost.”
Choi exhales, closing his eyes. He sits up, leaning back onto his hands, staring into the distance with a sense of sadness in his expression.
“When I was 12, my younger brother and I were very close. We were three years apart, but we had so much in common.
He pauses, lost in thought for a moment. He continues.
“Jinsang and I always shared a bedroom. We had a bunk bed, he slept on the top bunk.” He smiles wistfully. “He loved it up there. Always called himself ‘king of the world’. Even as he got older, he never lost his childlike wonder. He was the definition of pure at heart.”
You listen solemnly. You honestly were expecting some off-the-wall answer from him - you didn’t anticipate that it’d be anything so serious.
“Late one night, I was supposed to be asleep, but I was reading a book under the covers with my flashlight. Suddenly there was a blinding light that filled the room, and a deafeningly loud whirring noise that made me cover my ears. I pulled the blanket off me, but the only thing I could make out was some dark figures standing in the room. I couldn’t see who it was, so I assumed it was my parents. I called out for them, but the figures didn’t move. It was so loud and so bright. I was terrified.
Then - I heard my brother scream. He was screaming for help, but I was paralyzed. Suddenly everything stopped. The light and the sounds disappeared in an instant. I looked where the figures were standing, but nobody was there. I didn’t hear my brother anymore either. I jumped out of bed to check on him - but he wasn’t in his bed. I started to panic. I told myself maybe he had run out of the room, but I knew I didn’t see or hear him climb down. I ran to my parents crying, ‘Jinsang’s gone!’ They searched the house, but he wasn’t there. They searched the neighborhood, thinking he had run away, but he wasn’t anywhere. The police investigation went on for months. They never found him.”
He rests his head back on his hands. You sit there silently, not knowing what to say. Your mind races, trying to process his words: So, he believes his brother was abducted by aliens? He may be strange, but he’s not mentally disturbed, I really don’t believe he would just make something like that up… But what can the explanation be? Is it a false memory created as a trauma response to his brother disappearing?...
“I’m so sorry,” you finally tell him. Without thinking you place your hand on his shoulder - but after a moment you realize how awkward that might be. He’s your assigned work partner - you met him three days ago. But, you feel his tension slightly ease - your touch seems to be relaxing him. Choi lets out a deep exhale and sits up - you quickly drop your hand back to your side. He rests his palms on the bed, just barely grazing your pinky finger. You hold your breath as a spark of electricity rushes through your body - you ignore it.
“Thanks,” he says sincerely. “I know how it sounds to other people. But that’s why I get so invested in these cases. I have to know the truth, Y/ln.”
You sit in silence for a few moments.
“Well,” you finally speak as you get up, returning to the scattered files, “if your theory is correct we have one last chance.”
Choi perks up, a surprised look on his face. He stares at you for a moment, then grins as he processes what you just said. You grin back at him.
“Let’s go catch these sons of bitches.”
—
14 September 1993
Your stakeout plans are back on - this time you’ll be surveilling in the middle of the woods, by the lake, where the third kid had disappeared when camping with friends. Choi wakes you unnecessarily early with rapid knocking on your door. You answer in your pajamas, half asleep still. He invites himself into your room as he brushes past you and slams more files on the table. Turning to you earnestly, he begins to recant the game plan.
“Choi,” you interrupt, trying to shut him up. He doesn’t hear you. He rambles on - practically bouncing with excitement.
“Choi,” you repeat, this time louder. He stops, his round eyes animated with enthusiasm.
“Yeah?”
“It’s 6:30 in the morning. We’re staking out the location tonight.”
“And?”
“You could’ve at least let me sleep in til 7.”
“No time to lose!” he says eagerly as he turns back to his work, picking up where he left off. You let him yap for a minute before interrupting him once more.
“Can I at least get some coffee first?”
You head to the nearby shitty diner together, Choi of course working through breakfast. You can tell through his excited state that he’s on edge. This has to go right - it is, according to him, the best chance he’s ever had. You spend the day going over everything, reviewing every last little detail - cooperating with whatever he needs, whether it be tactical or simply supportive. Before you know it the sun starts to go down, and you’re on your way to the middle of fucking nowhere together, to find some aliens.
Choi parks the car on the rocky path near the shore, killing the engine. It’s quiet out here - peaceful. The lake is bigger than you expected, and surprisingly beautiful as it reflects the painted colors of the sun-setting sky.
“Romantic, isn’t it?”
You turn and look at your partner, intending to make some snide remark, but all thoughts in your mind vanish when you see him. The golden tones of the dusk sunrays bring out a beautiful glow in his skin, his brown eyes radiating in the light; you knew he was good-looking, but seeing him this close - he is absolutely stunning.
The logical part of your brain starts setting off alarms - you know you should be feeling uncomfortable in the intimacy of the whole situation (he’s your coworker for gods’ sake!!) but it couldn’t be more opposite. The other part of your brain simply has the urge to lean in and kiss him.
“Mhmm, sure,” you reply, feigning sarcasm, veiling your true feelings.
You chat informally with Choi (“You can call me Seungcheol,” the memory of his words flashes through your mind), conversation flowing naturally as you both talk about whatever comes to mind. You find yourself laughing more often than not, and you find yourself relating to your partner more than you ever anticipated. It’s easy being with him.
Logical brain is absolutely screaming at you right now. There’s no fucking way you can allow yourself to develop feelings for your work partner - you know this.
I’m allowed to like him as a friend, you say to yourself. You’re gonna be working with him for god knows how long, of course you need to get along. But you’re not convinced.
Conversation wanes into the night as darkness falls over the lake. You feel your eyelids grow heavy. Choi notices.
“You can sleep if you want,” he tells you. “I’ll wake you if anything happens.”
“I’m fine,” you assure him. But it’s quiet, dark - and soon you feel yourself beginning to drift off.
VRRROOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
You jolt awake, instantly blinded by the overpowering light surrounding you. A deafening booming noise permeates the air - you don’t know what it is, but it sounds like the rumbling of a thousand jet engines.
You can’t see shit, but you can tell Choi isn’t in the car. You heave open the passenger door, straining to push it open against the rush of wind engulfing the vehicle. Once your eyes adjust somewhat you find your partner about 15 feet away, camera in hand. You look up, but you can’t make out the massive object hovering over the lake - all you can see is five giant blinding spheres of light in the sky.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?” you scream to your partner - but he doesn’t hear you.
Suddenly, everything stops.
The lights, sound, and wind disappear in an instant. Disoriented in the dark, you stumble over to where Choi was standing, but you realize he’s gone - your eyes adjust and you see him sprinting down the lakeshore. In the distance you see another figure, laying on the ground. Choi approaches the figure, kneeling down next to it. You head toward them, but he turns to you and shouts from afar.
“CALL FOR BACKUP!!”
—
The figure on the beach indeed had been the missing boy. The ambulance rushed him to the hospital - but just as the previous two missing kids, he was okay. The next day you and Choi were able to get in and talk to him briefly before being shooed out by the nurse. It was the same story as the others - he didn’t remember anything, but he was completely unharmed.
Three out of three missing people now returned, safe and alive - your business here is done. You can finally get the fuck out of Iowa.
You’re pretty thrilled about leaving, but Choi is ecstatic. You remind him neither of you actually solved anything, but he doesn’t care. He got his photos of whatever the fuck was above the lake that night - it doesn’t answer all of his questions, but nevertheless he got what he came for.
It’s dark by the time you depart from the hospital, driving back to go pack up your things so you can leave first thing in the morning.
Choi parks the car, and you walk back to your rooms. As you approach the motel, he suddenly swings his arm out in front of you to stop you - the door to your room is slightly ajar, the lock broken. Choi draws his gun, and you follow suit. Holding up his fingers, he silently counts down from three. He bursts through the door, sweeping the room. You follow, turning on the light to see the entire room has been utterly ransacked - the contents of your suitcase as well as all the files from your briefcase are strewn everywhere.
Choi pops out of the bathroom. “All clear, but the bathroom window is open - if they were just here, they still might be nearby.” He sprints out of the room, pausing briefly and motioning for you to wait. “You stay here, I’ll sweep the area.” He’s gone in a flash.
You turn around and grimace at the absolute mess left behind by whoever the fuck was here. With a sigh you begin to clean up the mess, starting by gathering all the documents. As you sort through them all to put them back in some sort of order, you note that everything seems to be there. Your personal belongings all seem to be accounted for as well. Whatever they were searching for, they clearly didn’t find it.
Choi reappears in your room, sweating and breathing heavily. He shakes his head in disappointment. “Nobody in sight. Asked the manager if he saw anything suspicious, but he clearly didn’t know shit.”
He removes his suit jacket and throws it on the table before plopping down in the singular chair. He runs his hand through his sweaty hair as he lets out an exasperated sigh. “Anything missing?”
You shake your head. “Not a single thing.”
“Shit,” Choi mumbles under his breath. “They were probably looking for my room.”
You raise your eyebrow at him. “Who-”
He waves his hand at you, interrupting. “Don’t worry about it.”
You are worried about it, but you know he’s not going to elaborate even if pressed.
“Okay. Well, I want to shower and go to sleep, so kindly get the fuck out.” Your tone isn’t angry, you’re just exhausted.
Choi gets up, but instead of leaving he deadbolts the door and returns to his seat.
“Absolutely not, what if they come back? I’ll keep watch.”
You give him the most exasperated look. “Are you shitting me? I don’t need you to keep guard, I’ll be fine.”
“I’m not taking that chance,” he insists as he crosses his arms.
You’re stubborn as hell, but in the short time you’ve known Seungcheol Choi he’s done nothing but give you a run for your money in that department.
You roll your eyes. You’re too tired to argue with him. “Fine, whatever. Just give me some privacy, alright?”
Choi salutes you as he turns his chair around. “Roger that.”
You shower and make your way back to your bed. Choi is still sitting in the chair, facing the locked door, his gun and holster sitting on the table right next to him.
“Are you going to be able to sleep in that chair?” you ask. “Looks uncomfortable.”
Without turning, he replies. “I won’t be sleeping.”
“Seriously? You don’t need to stay up all night just to-”
“I’m not sleeping, Y/ln, it’s not up for debate.”
You stare at the back of his head. Sighing, you pull the covers up and go to turn off the lamp, but you pause.
“Choi?” you call out in a soft voice.
“Yes?”
“Thank you.”
He turns his head ever so slightly, looking at you out of the corner of his eye.
“Goodnight, Y/ln.”
With a swift click you pull the chain on the lamp, and the room is flooded in darkness. As your eyes adjust, the moonlight seeps in past the closed blinds, and you can just make out Choi’s shadow as he keeps watch. Protecting you.
Within seconds, you are fast asleep.
—
You open your eyes, the bright early morning sun rays peeking in through the window. You lay there, contemplating going back to sleep, when you remember the events of last night. You sit up abruptly to see your partner still in the chair, still facing the door, awake.
“Did you really stay up the whole night?” are the first words out of your mouth.
Choi turns around, his eyes tired but still alert. He nods.
“Did you know you snore in your sleep? Very quietly - it’s cute.”
“Oh, shut up” you grumble as you get out of bed.
Choi rises and grabs his jacket before heading toward the door. “Get ready, we have to be at the airport in an hour.” The door shuts behind him before you can respond with something snarky.
As you make your way to the parked car with your suitcase, you see your partner waiting for you - zoned out in the driver’s seat.
You yank the driver’s side door open, startling him as he nearly jumps out of his seat.
“Absolutely not,” you tell him sternly. “You didn’t sleep at all last night, I’m driving.”
“I’m fine, Y/n.”
You go to yell at him when you pause, realizing he just called you by your first name for the first time. He must be delirious, you think to yourself.
“No, you’re not. And I’d like to make it back home in one piece, thank you.”
“Y/n-”
“Seungcheol Choi get your dumb ass out of the fucking car NOW.”
The expression that washes over his face looks like that of a scolded puppy. He clearly wasn’t expecting you to shout at him.
“Okay, okay! Fine, you win.” He gets out of the car, walking around to the passenger side. As he opens the door he looks at you, trying to conceal the grin spreading across his face, but failing.
“I like you like this. You should yell at me more often.”
You stare at him, exhausted. “You’re insane.”
“So I’ve been told,” he says with a wink as he disappears into the car.
You sigh for what feels like the thousandth time this week. After a few deep breaths, you reluctantly join your partner in the car.
“And since when do you call me by my first name?” you inquire as you turn the ignition. The car engine comes to life with a rumble.
Choi looks at you, his eyelids heavy. He gives you a sleepy smile as you back out of the parking space.
“I told you you can call me Seungcheol,” he reminds you.
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
He gives no response, but shrugs, leaning back against the headrest and closing his eyes. You stare at him for a brief moment. His black curls lay unruly against his forehead, brushing against his long eyelashes. A faint shadow graces his jawline - the result of not having shaved today. The top few buttons of his shirt remain undone; he didn’t even bother with a tie. Once again, you find yourself stunned by how handsome he is. You push that thought away as your attention returns to operating the vehicle. You shift gears and pull out of the lot.
“Take a nap, dummy,” you tell him softly.
—
Not five minutes have passed into your drive before the sound of gentle snoring greets your right ear. You glance over to see Choi positively zonked out in the passenger seat. A grin involuntarily appears on your face - he may be a headstrong pain in the ass, but even the toughest agents eventually fall victim to the cursed necessity of sleep.
The “highway” out of town toward the airport is nothing more than a vacant country road. You drive for at least fifteen minutes without seeing a single other car. In the absence of Choi yammering on about some off-kilter conspiracy theory, or recounting a tale of a previous case that seems too fantastical to be true, your mind starts to wander. The events of the past week replay in your head. Unlike your partner you don’t quite believe you saw an alien spaceship, but whatever it was certainly is making you question a lot of things.
Your musings are cut short when Choi suddenly jolts awake, nearly making you jump.
“Jesus, Choi, you scared me.”
He blinks dully a few times, the gears in his head creaking back to life as he tries to reorient himself. After a brief moment of mild panic he regains lucidity, slumping back into his seat with a groan. He yawns as he rubs his eyes.
“Sorry,” he responds drowsily.
“Did you know you snore in your sleep? It’s cute,” you jest, repeating his words from earlier back to him. After a moment, he realizes.
“Fuck off,” he mumbles - but out of the corner of your eye you see him grin.
You turn the radio on low volume, tuning into the rock station the dial was already set on. A few minutes pass without words, the crooning voice of Mick Jagger supplementing the conversation. Suddenly, Choi perks up, looking in the rear view mirror before turning around to peer out the back window. You glance in the mirror to see a dark car in the distance.
“Finally, some sign of life,” you remark. “I was beginning to think we’d entered The Twilight Zone or something.”
Choi says nothing, but you notice the concern on his face. I wish he would stop being so paranoid, you think to yourself. He turns back around but keeps his eye on the mirror. Not even a minute later he snaps his head back to look out the rear window again.
“Shit,” he exclaims, his voice disgruntled.
You look in the mirror again to see the same car, rapidly approaching as it speeds toward you. Your eyes dart forward again, only to see another dark car up ahead - parked in the middle of the two-lane road, creating a blockade.
“You gotta be fucking kidding me,” he says through gritted teeth.
“Choi, can you please enlighten me as to what the fuck is going on,” you ask nervously.
“Fucking SHIT,” he shouts, not elaborating.
“CHOI.”
“Stop the car,” he gripes, his head in his hands.
You apply the brakes, as you couldn’t keep going even if you wanted to. The car ahead is blocking the whole road, and the trees on either side are preventing you from being able to swerve around it.
The car following you parks, also blocking the road behind you. Two men in dark suits emerge from each car and casually surround the rental. One of them, from the car in front, walks over to the passenger side of your rental - he knocks on the glass twice.
“Get out of the car.”
Choi unbuckles his seatbelt, taking his time, before reaching for the door handle. He pulls the latch and opens the door slowly.
“Both of you.”
Your partner turns to you. “Do what they say,” he says quietly.
You follow the mystery man’s orders. It’s early, but the sun already stings your skin as you step out of the car.
You look at the men, trying to get some sense as to who they are, but you’ve never seen any of them before - you presume they would have nothing on themselves that would give any sort of identification anyway. The men’s guns remain in their holsters, but their hands rest on the frames. You don’t doubt that they would shoot you in a heartbeat if you made any funny moves.
“Open the trunk,” the same man orders to neither of you in particular. His tone is stern, but not overly aggressive.
You make eye contact with your partner. He gives you a slight nod.
You take the keys from the ignition and walk to the rear, inserting them in the lock and turning the key. The trunk lid gives a loud clunk as it pops open. The man signals to the two men that came up from behind you - they approach the trunk, pushing you out of the way as they open it. Choi’s hands clench into a fist, but he doesn’t move.
The men carelessly rummage through the trunk’s contents until they find what they were apparently looking for: Choi’s camera bag. The man opens it and pulls out the chunky Nikon, removing its film.
“Hey, be careful with that!” Choi shouts angrily.
Once the other man finishes fishes out the remaining film canisters from the bag, they put the camera back. They signal to the ringleader - he nods. The other men immediately return to their car.
The man in charge claps his hand onto Choi’s shoulder forcefully.
“Thank you, Agents Choi and Y/ln - very much for your cooperation,” he says smugly. Choi shoves the man’s hand off his shoulder, teeth clenched. Without another word, the man heads back to his car.
“You won’t get away with this forever,” Choi shouts after him.
The man keeps walking. He doesn’t even turn his head as he replies mockingly.
“Keep up the good work, Agent Choi.”
You watch the cocky bastard enter the driver’s seat - both cars immediately take off. It was over as quickly as it had begun.
You know Choi is infuriated, but more than anything he looks absolutely dejected. He leans onto the car, his head resting on his arm in defeat.
“Who were those men?” you ask him quietly - but you suspect he doesn’t know either.
He takes a few moments before he lifts his head, resuming his posture. His saddened eyes lock with yours.
“They’re the sons of bitches who make sure nobody knows the truth. Lying to the public, hiding information even from us - destroying all evidence that UFOs exist.”
He lets out a deep sigh. “I really thought I had it this time. Turns out, I was just really fucking stupid.”
“You’re not stupid,” you tell him firmly. Softer, you add, “And I’m sorry that I didn’t believe you about… well, everything I guess.”
He laughs softly. “It’s okay, I don’t blame you. I’m the crazy alien guy in the basement, after all.”
He nudges you with his elbow, his voice friendly. “You know, you’re alright Agent Y/ln.”
You smile. “You’re alright too, Seungcheol.”
His face lights up at the sound of his first name. He smiles back at you warmly.
“Now, let’s actually get the fuck out of Iowa,” he says with vigor.
“That’s the best idea you’ve had all day.”
—
20 September 1993
Washington, D.C.
“You wanted to see me, sir?”
“Have a seat, Agent Y/ln.”
You sit in the sturdy oak chair across from the Assistant Director’s desk. You are, once again, joined by the nameless man - smoking his cigarette silently in the corner of the room.
“I read your report on the Iowa case,” Bergman tells you as he flips through the open file on his desk.
You wait for him to continue.
“It is certainly… of lower quality than your usual work.”
You hide a grimace. “What exactly was the problem with it, sir? I was very thorough.”
He gives you a tired look. “Yes, of course - but the report itself is not what I take issue with. What I take issue with is its contents. I assigned you to the x-files as a voice of reason - to rein in Agent Choi, not perpetuate his outlandish theories.
“With all due respect, sir, I followed standard protocol. My report gives no indication that I agree with Agent Choi’s conviction that what we saw was indeed a UFO, and that the government is responsible for some larger conspiracy - I simply detailed everything that I witnessed in Spirit Lake objectively as I experienced it.”
Bergman sighs before closing the file. “Alright, Agent Y/ln. You do good work. But next time, maybe try to prevent your partner from chasing after little green men.”
“They’re supposedly gray, actually. According to Agent Choi,” you inform him matter-of-factly.
Bergman stares at you, incredulous. He opens his mouth to say something, but gives up. He waves you out of his office.
"TAKE WHAT'S YOURS" ── when their girlfriend tries to initiate sex
ateez ot8┆ reader
[requested]
wc: 1.2k
a/n: the request didn't specify if this was their first time together as well so I took the liberty of giving it that context <3
MASTERLIST ┆reaction requests open
Hongjoong would be as eager as he's nervous. He's used to your makeout sessions cooling down when they get to this point; The point in which he has to stop himself from letting his hands linger where they ache to touch you, which happens to be every bit of skin he can get them on. That's why he can't help the surprised moan at the back of his throat when he feels your hands ghost underneath his t-shirt, your touch curious and impossibly hot. At first he thinks this is still under your usual boundaries, but then you softly scratch at his stomach with a low hum and he can't help but to arch his bag into your touch with a pleased whine. He's smilling when he breaks the kiss, looking down at you with hazy eyes.
"Ouch" he jokes, chesire grin on his face.
You caress over the scratch marks and look at him through your lashes.
"My bad..."
He's about to tease you further when he sees you slide off the couch and onto your knees. His breath catches on his throat when you lift the hem of his t-shirt and press a chaste kiss over the red marks you've left on the soft skin of his stomach. You can feel him tense underneath you when you drag your tongue across it, his hands hovering over your head and he has to stop himself from tangling his fingers on your hair.
Seonghwa can feel the way your breath becomes heavier where it hits his neck. His hands are already on your sides, where they've been caressing up and down slowly under your t-shirt for the past few minutes. He wasn't expecting anything from it, simply enjoying the way his fingertips make goosebumps bloom wherever they kiss you.
"You okay?" he asks, and you can hear the smile on his voice.
He needs to know where you are at, whether you want things to go further or if you simply want to enjoy the feeling of his body underneath yours. Either way he's more than eager to please. You nod your head, nose brushing against his neck and making him shudder with a breathless chuckle. His hand falls to your lower back, slightly pressing you closer against him until your chest is flush against his chest. He's going to let you do anything you want to him, even if all you wanna do is dry hump him for hours while he holds you in his arms. Anything for you.
Yunho has a hard time pretending that he doesn't want to eat you whole almost about every second he spends with you. It just gets harder whenever you are both alone, especially when it's behind closed doors. Usually he can satisfy that need by having you underneath him on the couch, softly kissing you while his hands dare to maybe, just maybe sneak underneath your clothes and run up and down your spine. He prays your smell still clings to his clothes by the time he gets time alone and can satisfy himself the way he needs. More than one time he hasn't even waited for that, simply excusing himself to the bathroom and coming back a few minutes later, lazy smile on his lips and his body and clothes hot to the touch like he's just run a marathon.
So when you place your legs around his hips and push him flush against your core his first reaction is to smile into the kiss. He opens his eyes when he feels your hands pull at his hair, and his eyes roll back towards the ceiling as a silent thank you because god knows he was about to lose his composure. He lets you kiss him, expertly pretending to not be in a hurry when in reality he can barely keep himself from letting his full body weight pin you against the couch, rolling his hips hard against yours until you are squirming underneath him.
He can't hold back a boyish giggle when he feels your hands toying with the elastic band of his boxers that peeks from underneath his jeans, making you part from him with a confused expression on your face. He can see the sudden hesitation and faint embarrassment in your eyes, so he brings you closer to him in a panic. He doesn't know how to explain to you that he can feel the anticipation and excitement bubbling in his stomach, the warm feelings spreading through his chest and all the way between his legs.
"I'm sorry. I just liked that way too much"
"Why did you laugh" you pout, playfully slapping his broad chest with your hand.
"I'm sorry"
His fingers tighten where they hold you as he apologizes again with a guilty chuckle. He then looks down at you, smile still on his face before he dives in for another kiss, one that lets you know how eager he actually is to let you play with him in whatever way you want.
You can feel the way San pauses for a second when he feels the shift on the way you touch him, as if assessing if you are really doing it on purpose. His body tenses when you deepen the kiss, tongue sliding against his with a breathy moan that has blood rushing down to his dick and he has to shift in his seat to a more comfortable position. He takes in a small breath before placing a hand on the side of your face and kissing you deeper, slower, like he's giving you time to reconsider if this is what you really want. It takes everything in him to act poised and not give away how much he wants you, but he can't stop his hips buckling and pressing against yours almost with a mind of their own. He buries his fingers in your hair and softly scratches at your scalp as he subtly tries to get you to sit on his lap, gently pulling you closer.
"Do you want to sit on me?" he shuts his eyes tightly "I mean, on my lap" he asks, but his hand has already fallen to the back of your leg, squeezing softly in a quiet plea "It'll be more comfortable for you, baby"
It's sort of endearing how worried Mingi is about how much he wants you. He doesn't want to get ahead of himself, but he might get too eager too quickly for his own liking. You don't mind, but he's worried you might get shy or overwhelmed. His nails are digging at your sides before he can stop himself, and when he hears the soft yelp of surprise through your parted lips he lets go slightly, reminding himself to calm down and let you take the lead. You can feel the way his body stiffens, and if it wasn't for the soft moans he breathes into your lips with every kiss you might think he's uncomfortable. His brows furrow over his closed eyes, and you can't help but laugh at how endearing he looks.
"You okay?"
His eyes open, heavy lided, and he swallows.
"Yeah"
He gives you a sheepish smile, and you decide to not tease him any further and give him the permission that he needs.
He wastes no time in indulging you in what you want, but he's going to be as annoying about it as possible. He lets himself be kissed and touched and will lean into your touch with the throatiest of moans and the cockiest of smiles. He gets a bit drunk in how much you want him, and will definitely tease you about it as a way to rill himself up.
"Someone is needy"
You feel his crooked smile where you kiss him and you make an annoyed sound of protest and decide to ignore him, pressing yourself harder onto him to shut him up. He hates how you drag a loud moan out of him, and he bites down on his bottom lip in frustration before he speaks again to even out the playing field.
"Do you want me, mh?" he asks, breath hot where it fans against your face. His gaze falls down to where his hard-on presses against your core as he deliberately rolls his hips against yours, pressing your body down harder on him "Tell me how much"
Jongho lets you do as you please while keeping his composure almost perfectly. He's almost amused as he watches you get worked up by yourself, with your hands touching all over him and lips desperately chasing his. There's a faint smile on his lips as he leans back, unconsciously making you climb over him and sitting on his lap. He keeps his eyes open too, so he doesn't miss any detail of it: the way your face looks as you kiss him, how your legs straddle his lap to grind down on him, how innocent you look with your eyes closed. He finds you so, so cute.
"Do you want to move to the bedroom?" he asks in a low, almost teasing tone "I can carry you there, come on"
ᯓ★𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: It doesn't matter who Seungcheol is with: He will always be yours.
ᯓ★𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: ex boyfriend!Seungcheol x reader
ᯓ★𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: pwp, exes to fwb, 18+
ᯓ★𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: drinking, cursing (the least of your worries tbh lol), cheating, outside sex/exhibitionism, oral (f receiving), clit stimulation, dirty talk, pet names, cream pie (im not gonna hold you, one position idk what to call it lol), they are both toxic I'm ngl
ᯓ★𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: 2.1K
ᯓ★𝐀𝐍: Idk man. Cheol really got it going on. Thank you @lovetaroandtaemin for looking at this for me at the last minute. This is probably the first time I have been inspired to write something and finish it in a day lol.
"😏"
You knew this was a bad idea. You had no business texting Seungcheol in the middle of Seungkwan’s party that you were both at, especially while he was sitting next to his girlfriend. Unfortunately for you, he looked good as hell, wearing those gold-rimmed glasses that you liked and his usual black shirt and grey sweats combo. You were nothing short of turned on and didn’t mind being the toxic ex for the night.
Fuck it, we ball, right?
You smirked as you pressed send, sipping your lemonade and white tequila. The bravado flowed through your body as you looked across the room, waiting to see his reaction as he slid his screen up. His girlfriend, some cherry-picking girl he met while visiting his parents, looked away at the perfect time as he read your text, biting the bottom of his lip. His eyes searched the room until he saw you, a gleam of mischief in his eyes as he mouthed one word to you: Really?
You shrugged, feeling confident that you got his attention, and turned your attention to your best friend Seungkwan, who told a story that you were zoning in and out. This isn’t your first song and dance with Seungcheol. He’s the ex that you can’t stand to be around but can’t stop yourself from being underneath, either. He’s intoxicating, addictive, and, to be frank, the best sex of your life. You two can only stop fighting when he is either fucking you into the mattress or if you’re sitting on his face. Call it toxic, sure, but you love every second of it.
“What are you drinking there?” Vernon grabbed a stool and sat next to you, a red cup in hand.
“Just my usual pink lemonade and Patron,” you raised your cup.”You want me to make you what I got?”
“Yeah, sure.”
You slid off your stool, your skirt accidentally rising up your legs as you walked to the other side of the table, mixing your usual concoction with a side of lemon. You gazed at Seungcheol again, who was entertaining whatever conversation his girlfriend was having as she sat on his lap. Jealousy consumed you as you watched his hands caress her legs, his chin resting perfectly on her shoulder as if he were the boyfriend of the year. You may not want to be with Suengcheol, but that doesn’t mean you want him with anyone else, either. He’s yours until you say otherwise. Possessive, you know, but you don’t care.
“Here, Vern,” you handed him his drink. “I made my best one just for you.”
“Aw, you shouldn’t have,” he replied. “You don’t have a crush on me now, do you?”
You cock an eyebrow, leaning against the counter. “You wish.”
“Uh-huh.”
You rolled your eyes playfully, took another sip of your drink, and scoped out the scene in the kitchen. Seungkwan, Soonyoung, and Seokmin decided it was time for drunk karaoke as they belted their hearts out to some songs playing on the stereo. Cheers and wallops filled the kitchen, and you even sang with them for a bit, temporarily taking your mind off Seungcheol as you enjoyed the good vibes. Your voice cracked and croaked, but you didn’t care; you wanted to have a good time.
Over an hour later, your throat was dry and tired, and you bowed playfully as you stepped outside with bottled water, needing some fresh air. Sitting on one of the swing chairs, you pulled your buzzing phone out of your pocket, reading three messages from Seungcheol:
“Wya?”
“?”
“???”
You snickered and typed a response, about to press send, when the crunch of leaves followed by a person's figure came from behind you, his wooden cologne greeting you before he did.
“Seungcheol,” you remarked, crossing your legs.
“You don’t know how to answer your phone now?” He was slightly irritated.
“I’m afraid I don’t,” you reply sarcastically, leaning back against the seat. “I’m surprised you’re still here.”
“Why?”
“I thought you would’ve left with Little Bo Peep over there.”
“You’re a brat.”
You shrugged. “I know.”
You earned a chuckle from him, and you joined in, patting down the seat for him to sit next to you. The air shifted between you two, going from light to heavy with sexual tension. The thought of the last time you were together, when he had you bent over his counter, his fingernails digging in your hips as he fucked you from behind, brought desire into your heart and jolts of excitement in between your legs. Looking around, you notice the only light that can be seen is from the full moon, and it’s hidden behind tall oak trees that give you enough privacy… enough to…
“So, about that text,” he said, getting straight to the point. “That was very bold of you.”
“Well, yes,” you replied, smirking as you looked at him. “I want what I want.”
“Yeah, no shit,” he chuckled, running his fingers through his hair. “Did you want her to see it?”
You turned to him slightly, caught off guard. “What do you mean?”
“Don’t play dumb,” he said bluntly. “Did you want her to see the text?”
You keep a good poker face, but you are annoyed. Seungcheol can read you well, and when you shifted your seat, his gaze became too intense to handle. "And what if I did?"
“Hmm,” his voice trailed off. “I never thought I’d see the day where you’d get jealous.”
“Oh please,” you scoffed, your eyes flashing with anger. “The fuck do I have to be jealous of?”
Your irritation knew no bounds, and you knew you had to get away. You would never admit that envy burned at you when you saw Seugncheol and his little lamb of a girlfriend together. She was starting to integrate into your friend circle, and you hated it. It reminded you of the main point of why you kept breaking up after you soon got back together: he refused to commit to you, but he had no problem with doing it with someone else.
You suddenly got up and dusted off your legs, leaving your water on the seat and making your way back to the house. “Have a good night, Cheol,” you called out.
You were halfway to the door when heavy footsteps were heard from behind you, followed by a pull of your arm as you were dragged behind a tree. Seungcheol’s hands grabbed your face as he placed a desperate kiss on your lips, making your knees buckle.
“You are so annoying,” you mutter, tugging at his hair.
“You love me,” he whispered against your lips.
“Whatever.”
His tongue invaded your mouth as his hands hiked up your skirt and pulled your panties to the side. His index finger found your clit and rubbed it softly, a sweet moan escaping your lips. He smirked against your skin as he started sucking on your neck, nipping at you softly as he trailed to your collarbone.
“God, you smell so good,” he spoke as if under a spell. “You’re perfect. I couldn’t leave you alone if I tried.”
Not giving you any time to respond, he suddenly dropped down, his face facing your core as he pulled off your panties and shoved them in his pocket. Hiking your leg up, his tongue swiped at your core, earning a long, guttural moan from you as you braced yourself on the tree. You felt filthy and so alive, listening to him feast happily on your pussy while you babbled incoherently, tension building as you softly rode his face.
“Feels good,” you mumbled, pulling his hair tighter.
“I know, baby,” he breathed against your thigh.
“W-we don’t have a lot of time,” you barely breathed out. “Somebody will come looking for us.”
“What if I said I didn’t care?”
The thought of being caught should’ve scared you and made you feel ashamed, but instead, it set you ablaze. Fire and desire were all you could see, and you wanted him even more. “Show me how much you don’t care, then.”
Seungcheol left one lasting kiss on your nub before shoving down his sweats, revealing his thick cock already dripping with precum. You watched him rub it on his shaft, your mouth salivating as you watched him lubricate himself, tiny veins popping out on his length. You’ve never told him this, but you’ve always thought he had the prettiest dick you’ve ever seen. It’s clean and thick, and you love the way it fits in your mouth.
Seungcheol kissed you again, lifting up your leg as he lined up to your entrance, entering you slowly.
You threw him a puzzled look. “You don’t want me to—”
“N-No,” he sputtered as he filled you up. “You might have had a point about there not being enough time.”
You laughed softly as he pulled out and, without warning, snapped into you, grabbing the back of your neck. His eyes penetrated yours as he fucked you deeply, your walls clenching around him as he hit every spot. He looked desperate and in love, his low groans spilling out of that beautiful mouth of his.
“Fuck,” you cried out.
“Shhh,” his lips pressed against yours. “They’ll hear us.”
“I don’t care.”
You felt tingling in your core, a dam ready to break as he continued to fuck you hard against the tree, whispering nasty things in your ear. You begged for more, goading him to fuck you harder until he sent your body falling over a cliff into a pile of ecstasy. You felt hazy, riding out a high as Seungcheol fucked you through your orgasm, his pace sloppy as he reached his peak.
“It’s okay,” you nodded. “Cum inside of me.”
You were already on birth control, and you didn’t mind being filled with a load. It was a pleasure to see his eyes roll back as he emptied himself inside of you, his warm breath against your skin as he slowly came down from cloud nine. He stilled until he was completely empty, kissing your forehead while he pulled out of you slowly, a long, sticky, messy following after.
“That was…”
“I know.”
You adjusted your skirt, the adrenaline wearing off, and now feeling the implant of tree bark on your butt. You did your best to make yourself look normal sans the missing panties.
“I need my panties,” you reached out your hand.
“Do you?” Seungcheol asked, quirking an eyebrow.
“Yes..?” You stated the obvious. “I would like to prevent as much cum as I can from running down my leg.”
“Hmm, maybe I would like to see that.”
You pinched his shoulder and grabbed your panties from his left pocket, shoving them on and flattening your skirt one last time. You looked at the back door, the party still in full swing as everyone had moved into the living room. “I’ll go first, and you can come in a few minutes, okay?”
He nodded, and you walked back to the house, slipping in quietly from the backdoor. You poured yourself another drink, swirling it slowly before drinking it, taking it all in. True to his word, Seungcheol comes in a few moments later from the front door, sneaking into the bathroom for a few minutes and then coming out to greet his girlfriend. She looked at him puppy-eyed and in love, and all you could do was laugh. If only she knew.
“Hey, there you are!” Seungkwan exclaimed as he waltzed into the kitchen with a bowl of chips. “You disappeared on us.”
“Sorry, I needed a bit of air.”
“Ah, it’s okay, friend,” he twirled around, almost running into the refrigerator. “Are you staying in the spare room again?”
“Mmhmm,” you nodded. “I brought a change of clothes.”
You attempted to take another sip of your lemonade before realizing it was all gone. Moving to grab another bottle, Seungkwan suddenly moved closer to you, inspecting your neck.
“What is that?” He asked loudly. “Is that a h—”
“Shhh!” you pinched him. “Do you want to announce it to the whole party?”
“Wait,” he lowered his voice. “You and Cheol were gone for a long time. Oh, please don’t tell me you’re at it again.”
“Fine,” you shrugged. “I won’t tell you.”
“While his girlfriend is here?!” Seungkwan gasped. “You are so bad… Tell me everything later.”
You nodded as he returned to the living room, and you were left alone to make your last drink before joining everyone. The party went on for another hour before people started leaving, Vernon and Seungcheol were among the last people to leave. You hugged Vernon by and attempted to nod curtly at Seungcheol before he pulled you into a hug.
“I’ll text you,” he whispered in your ear.
“Okay.”
Maybe you don’t hate him… you might even love him still. But one thing you know for sure: this is far from over.
summary|| you kiss them suddenly ! how would they react ?
gener|| fluff, humor
warnings|| kissing (duh), suggestive at some parts, some parts are longer than the others
reference|| you
a/n|| honestly this didn't stick to the idea but i couldn't get it out my head, i haven't slept all night so it may have errors or ooc stuff, my eyes are burning i should sleep,
also i am taking a hiatus but this is a little something for me to forget the stress
wc|| 822
BANGCHAN — absolutely, in the most obvious way.
he would pause whatever he was doing as soon as you were in his sight, hands off the keyboard and slowly circling your waist when you lean down to kiss him.
he lets out a heavy sigh through his nose when your lips finally meet his, it is like a heavy weight on his shoulder has been lifted, he doesn't pull you closer nor let you go, chan gives you absolute control on the pace, he just likes to sit and lose himself in you.
LEE KNOW — yes, but subtly
he immediately got suspicious as soon as you climbed up next to him on the sofa, he doesn't move much when you lean down toward him but you can feel the way he move his head at a better angle for you
minho doesn't let go of his phone, nor change his position if someone who doesn't know him well they'd assume he was unaffected but you know him far too well to notice how his tense shoulders relax and his breath hitching–how when you pull back his eyes stay on your lips for a second and you don't miss the tiny little move of him leaning a little closer, almost like he was chasing them in a daze
SEO CHANGBIN — um..quite the opposite actually
don't get me wrong he would, will, and is melting but he's too whipped to stop at a simple kiss
it doesn't matter where you are, your house, in the company, backstage, if you attempted to kiss him his arms are already pulling you closer tightly against his chest, and when you pull back he'd plant million of another kisses all across your face and wherever he can reach, cooing at how you love him so much
so yeah you're the one who'll end up melting and wanting more..good luck
HWANG HYUNJIN — yes and will last for a long time
this man straightened up as soon as he realized what you were going for and he met you halfway through, he immediately went for a deep kiss, inhaling like he was taking in your scent, when you pull away you can see clearly how happy he was just from the shine in his eyes
hyunjin wouldn't calm down after that either, he'll keep tracing, touching, or licking his lips every few seconds, if you were somewhere with the members he wouldn't hesitate to say that it's because you two kissed, hell you're sure that if he was allowed he'd say it on camera
HAN JISING — get a bucket to contain the puddle
han is the most oblivious man you'll ever meet, i stand by that, if even with you being a few inches away from his face didn't give him the clue that you're leaning for a kiss – BUT he's also the sweetest one too
as soon as your lips touches his he's gone, malfunctioning, he'll melt into wherever he's sitting, literally sliding down like a ragdoll, if you two were standing then he'll pull you closer and lean against a surface because he KNOWS his knees would give up if he didn't get support to stay standing
LEE FELIX — ...uh yes? kinda?
well i don't know what to call it exactly but he's too eager, his eyes would literally lit up and he lean into it excitedly almost knocking the two of you off, he'll be smiling widely the entire time, it's honestly cute how happy he sound
but that's it for you now you can't pull away cause he'll pout and ask for more or chase you around the house until you give in, and a small kiss turns into two that turn into a full on make out, he just can't get enough of you!!
KIM SEUNGMIN — well…
he's like a statue, doesn't even show confusion when you suddenly get closer to him, nor will he lean more into the kiss but he also doesn't pull away, if you pull away, offended by his reaction he'll act clueless asking you “what it is?” with those puppy eyes of his, when you get upset and try to walk away he'll laugh and pull you back “at least finish what you started”
(well of course he'll melt, he is a total softy–a mischievous one but still a softy, if you were standing up he'll ask to sit down if you were sitting down he'll ask to lay down with the excuse of it being more comfy but honestly he's just starting to feel all tingly and weak in his joins)
YANG JEONGIN — yes! ….with struggle
first you have to get him into the kiss to test him, if jeongin wasn't in a touching mood (which is 65% with you and 96% with the members (the remaining 4 are felix)) good luck on getting to him, you could swear he has muscle in his neck from how hard it is to get him to bend down his head when he doesn't want to
but if you managed to get to him and smash your lips against his, he'll simply let out a sigh before leaving everything he was doing and wrapping his arms around you, he'll grumble for a second but then he'll get more into it than you
i do think and believe that it'll end with his mouth all over your body–
summary: after a devastating breakup, your brother’s best friend is looking for a place to stay, and ever the saint, your brother offers your shared apartment. you don’t mind, not really. you just feel really sad for him.
word count: 7.5k
warnings: brother’s best friend trope, mingyu is the brother, seungcheol is in the trenches, reader is overworked. fluff, angst, smut, unprotected sex, rough sex, mentions of healthcare and the hospital, implications of depression, banter verging on slightly mean, reader shows avoidant behavior, seungcheol comes off as a bit of an asshole
PART 2
Your car beeps as you lock it, blinking twice before going dark. You sigh and hitch your bag higher up your shoulder with your hand before rounding around the car to enter the building. The sun rose a while ago, but the sky is still mellow with morning glow. Your legs feel heavy, and you are not surprised in the least by it, of course. Working a 24 hour shift does that to a person.
The elevator dings as it lets out on your floor. You fumble with the keys and your hilariously large keychain for a bit (it is cute though, you will defend your little trinkets till the end of time), before pushing the door open, the metal of your water bottle clanking against the wood. You toe your shoes off quickly, entering the living room, already thinking about just dropping starfished on your bed and not moving for the rest of the day.
You stop short when you catch sight of the figure on the couch, swathed in blankets and chewing loudly on something. There’s a crinkle of plastic as he reaches his hand into the bag of chips, putting two more in his mouth. He doesn’t notice that you are in the room until you set your bottle down on the table next to the couch, and the sound startles him. His wide, almond shaped eyes blink up at you, brown hair catching on his eyelashes. You distinctly notice the bags under his eyes. In the distance, you can hear the shower running.
“Why are you awake?” You ask. “It’s 8 in the morning.”
“Couldn’t sleep.” His voice is hoarse, probably from disuse for the entire night, and you balk at him.
“You haven’t slept at all?” You drop heavily on the couch next to him. He doesn’t reply, turning back to the screen. A rerun of some sitcom is playing on it. Nothing that requires his attention that much. You sigh. Is there really any point in talking to him? More importantly, is it your place?
There’s clinking and clatter coming from the bathroom, and the sound of water running has stopped. You look up when Mingyu exits, and a cloud of steam follows him out. His hair is dripping wet, but his button up shirt is saved from it by the towel he has draped over his shoulders. He is likely getting ready for work. He smiles at you and makes a beeline for the kitchen. You follow him, leaving his friend on the couch, still engrossed in whatever he is so interested in.
“He didn’t sleep all night.” You say in lieu of a greeting and Mingyu sighs, tinkering with the coffee machine until it hums.
“I know. I found him like that at like, 2 in the morning.”
You stare at your brother, thinking for a moment before speaking again. “How long is this going to go on?”
He pours the coffee into a mug, a dejected look on his face, shrugging. “She broke his heart. He loved her so much, you know? He’s taking it pretty badly.”
“But he has to try and get on with his life.”
Mingyu gives you a look. “I’m not kicking him out.”
You raise your hands immediately in a pacifying action. “I didn’t mean that at all! He can stay as long as he wants. But rotting in front of the TV isn’t healthy.”
Mingyu is halfway through his coffee already, polishing off the breakfast bar he grabbed. He gave you a teasing smirk.
“Then fix him. You’re the doctor.”
You roll your eyes, walking away from him. “I might have to. Since you’re absolutely no help.”
You don’t mean the words at all, and Mingyu knows it. Your brother is fiercely loyal to his friends, and he had been the first person that Seungcheol came to after his catastrophic breakup with Jiyu, his fiancée. While Seungcheol didn’t necessarily run in the same circles as you, owing to the age difference and separate career paths after high school, you found out about everything from Mingyu when you came home from the hospital one day to find the door of your spare bedroom wide open, a stationary lump on top of the bed and a suitcase in the living room, still unpacked.
You were more than okay with Seungcheol crashing with you after Mingyu explained everything. They had been having problems for a while, it amalgamated into a huge fight, Seungcheol had to move out, yadda yadda. That was three weeks ago. In those three weeks, the only progress Seungcheol made towards getting back to normal life was going from wallowing in the bedroom to wallowing on the living room couch. Mingyu claims it’s a huge step, and encourages Seungcheol every day. But deep down, you know he is worried for his best friend. So by extension, you are worried for him too.
It has been this way since you were kids. Seungcheol was Mingyu’s first friend in elementary school. You remember being barely 10, finding yourself on the back porch, watching them bounce around the backyard with a volleyball. Every few minutes, you would beg Mingyu to let you join them, which he would stubbornly refuse. They were already in their teens, five years older than you, while you were still a kid in their eyes. So you watched from the sidelines, entertaining yourself as a spectator.
It almost feels like you’re spectating as an adult too, watching as Mingyu flits around Seungcheol, trying to make him feel better without imposing too much. You can’t blame him for not knowing what to do. What’s the protocol for how to treat someone who broke up with the love of his life after seven years? Neither of you know. So that leaves you in this limbo of watching and wanting to do something, and ending up doing nothing at all.
It’s painful to see Seungcheol still on the couch when you wake up that afternoon. This time, the TV is being ignored while he scrolls through his phone. You just sigh and head to the kitchen, contemplating what you could do for him, if anything at all. You have to try something, because while Seungcheol is primarily Mingyu’s friend, he has been a constant part of your life for nearly two decades. You would almost count him as your own friend too.
You make two helpings of lunch that day, carrying the plates to the couch where Seungcheol is curled up under a blue fleece blanket.
“Scooch.” You instruct, and he straightens with a wince. You hold a plate out for him and he takes it, slightly surprised.
“You cooked for me?”
“Don’t get used to it.” You reply, voice muffled by the spoonful you had already shoved into your mouth. “I don’t have time to cook, usually.”
He digs into the food without answering, and for a few seconds, it’s silent as you stare blankly at the TV.
“It’s really good.” He says quietly. You falter for a second, looking at him.
His eyebags are just as bad, if not worse. His lips are a little chapped, and he looks paler than usual. Figures. He’s been living like a hermit for weeks. You almost wish he didn’t work from home, because at least an in-person office would give him an excuse to get out of the house.
“Seungcheol.” You begin.
He sighs almost imperceptibly, and you wouldn’t catch it if you weren’t analyzing him so closely. You imagine he is preparing himself for another pep talk, telling him everything will be okay, and that he’s doing great and he can do even better. He doesn’t stop eating.
“You look like shit, man. When was the last time you showered?”
He starts, mouth paused mid chew to look at you. You stare right back, face blank. Finally, Seungcheol snorts.
“At least you didn’t say I’m doing a great job by getting out of bed.”
You pout in response, feeling miffed on behalf of your brother. “Hey! He’s trying his best.”
He sighs. “I know, I know.”
“I know you’re trying your best, too.”
He gives you a soft smile, and you can’t help but smile back. It’s been a while since you’ve seen him express anything close to happiness. Though, you’re sure he is still pretty far off.
“You know,” you begin. “My hospital is doing a free medical camp this weekend. Routine check ups, eye exams, breast exams, the whole nine yards.”
You nudge him. “We are looking for as many hands as possible to help out with logistics, organization, documentation. We’re taking non-medical volunteers too.”
Seungcheol seems to be in an internal battle with himself at your implication. You sigh as you remember how much he used to love getting out of the house. He couldn’t sit still for the life of him.
He has always loved sports. Football, basketball, volleyball. He liked being active and awake. Seungcheol was the kind of person who went to the gym six days a week. Even when he didn’t feel good, he would still go and do light exercise. He always said that being consistent was important. Between him and your brother, you were also a regular visitor at their gym. Of course, ever since your workload ramped up, you had dropped it. You were running around the hospital all day, that was enough activity for you.
Still, you were human. You had eyes. And watching Seungcheol at the gym was always a treat. He was crazy strong, even more so than your giant of a brother. And when you saw him lifting impossible weights at the gym, you could see how he got the strength he possessed.
Seeing him at present, small under the blankets and sickly pale, you missed his active, motivated side.
“It will be good for you. I promise.”
Seungcheol contemplates for a little bit, and finally gives you a slow nod.
………………….
You don’t remember where the days went, a flurry of hospital shifts, beeping monitors, the smell of disinfectant and stacks of papers outlining how the camp was going to run. You were assigned to patient histories and triage, one of the more difficult things to do, in your opinion. Usually people came to these camps with a wide variety of complaints, and sorting them out could take a while, which is less than ideal when you’ve got a huge volume of people to get through.
It’s still better than the counseling desk. Small mercies, you suppose.
You all but forget about the offer you made to Seungcheol until he knocks on your bedroom door the night before. He looks almost sheepish as he asks you for when he needs to be there the next morning. You blink twice, confused, before suddenly remembering.
“Oh right! The camp. You can come with me. I leave at 8 o’clock.” You offer. “We asked all volunteers to come early so they can help set up.”
He nods. “Okay, I’ll be ready.”
He gives you a tiny smile which looks more like a grimace. You watch him meander back to his room. You notice how his shoulders sag, different from the confident way he carries himself usually. You wonder, once again, how bad the breakup must have been to leave him such a mess. He almost doesn’t feel like the Seungcheol you know at all.
You are happy he asked, though. It is initiative, at least. He could’ve easily just skipped.
Mingyu is thrilled when he hears the next day that Seungcheol is volunteering. He is so over the moon, in fact, that he offers to make you two a nice breakfast while you get ready. Something fancier than cereal or an apple. You wholeheartedly agree, watching him work while waiting for Seungcheol to finish up in the bathroom. When he emerges, he looks more human than he has in weeks. He is wearing a simple white T-shirt and pants, but his hair is smoothed off his forehead instead of all over the place, and his face has a bit more color than usual. You give him a smile, which he returns.
Breakfast is pancakes, which Mingyu manages to whip up from scratch. Both you and Seungcheol fill up quickly after you get ready. Nothing fancy for you, just regular black scrubs. You glance at the clock, announcing that you have to leave so you can get there early. Seungcheol pockets his phone and wallet, tugging on a pair of comfortable shoes (you had warned him that he might have to stand for long hours). The car ride is mostly you going over some explanations, telling him where you will be and roughly what he has to do.
“Joshua from Admin has the specifics.” You say. “I’ll introduce you to him as soon as we get there.”
Joshua is calmer than you expected when you arrive, considering you are only about an hour from starting. Usually by this point, he is frantic, running around with a fire lit under his ass, but he even has time to look up from his tablet and smile as you introduce him to Seungcheol.
“Looks like things are going well.” You look around. There’s many people already there, arranging chairs and tables, running around with stacks of papers and tags.
Joshua nods and you can see the pride in his expression. “Smoothest they’ve gone in years.”
“Don’t jinx it.” You warn. He only shrugs.
Joshua quickly puts Seungcheol to work, and you trek to your station, looking down at the paper bracelets on your desk, color coded to divide people into what kind of care they need. You hear the sound of metal clacking and turn around when someone stops next to you.
“Looks like we’re paired together.” Soonyoung grins. He is dressed in sky blue scrubs, holding blood pressure monitoring apparatus, the kind with wheels that he can drag around to his comfort. You smile back and fist bump him, happy that your partner for the day is someone you get along with so swimmingly.
Soonyoung is the charge nurse in the ER. While you weren’t an ER doctor anymore, you often got called down there for consults, and you spent many months on rotation there a couple of years ago. Soonyoung was probably the most competent healthcare worker you had ever met. He was dedicated, had the stamina of a bull, and worked fast. His years of ER experience meant he was efficient. No wonder he got assigned to Triage. Today was a normal day of chaos for him.
You catch up with him as you set up the desk in a way that could smooth out the patient flow best for both of you. He tells you above the turnover in the ER. Who is currently the biggest pain in his ass and who is a diamond in the rough. You spot Seungcheol in the distance, carrying a stack of plastic chairs. He is engaged in conversation with someone you don’t recognize, a guy with a baseball cap and a clipboard. You are a little relieved that he has managed to busy himself and get along with someone. Maybe it can help get his mind off his problems.
When camp officially starts, your mind is completely occupied by the flurry of patient complaints and vitals. Soonyoung helps the best he can, taking vitals, slapping on bracelets and being vocal to keep the line moving. It’s hours and hours of constant work, but extremely fulfilling as well. By the time someone announces that they are closing up, you have a tired smile on your face while Soonyoung whoops. He looks just as active as when he started, and it makes you shake your head.
“You astound me.”
“In a good way?”
You roll your eyes. “Of course in a good way!”
He grins so wide that his eyes turn into cute slits, and you laugh. You look up when Seungcheol walks up to your desk, and you beam up at him.
“Hi!”
Soonyoung looks at him questioningly, so you introduce Seungcheol to him quickly. They shake hands, and Soonyoung uses that moment to stand up and stretch.
“I’m gonna go find Jihoon.” He tells you. “See you around!”
Seungcheol sits down on the chair Soonyoung just evacuated and sighs. You give him a sympathetic look.
“Tired?”
He shakes his head. “No, no. It was nice. I enjoyed it.”
You feel relief wash over you. “I’m glad. See? I told you it would be great for you!”
“You said good.”
“And it exceeded my promise. So I win.”
“Win what?”
“Nothing. Shut up.”
He laughs then, for the first time in ages, and you can’t help but stare. His cheeks dimple with the force of it, and his hair falls over his eyes. He pushes it away, but it just flops right back. Classic Seungcheol move. You realise you really had missed seeing him like this.
By the time you had landed in university in the same city as your brother, both him and Seungcheol had already graduated. Your parents thought it would be better to live with Mingyu instead of on campus, since you weren’t far from it anyway. While you adjusted to student life, you watched Seungcheol flit in and out of your apartment, busy with trying to enter the corporate world. He was single back then, though not for long since he met Jiyu quite soon after that.
He loved giving you annoying, unsolicited advice about university, despite medical school being vastly different to whatever his experience was. You told him that multiple times, but he conveniently ignored it in favor of regaling you with tales of what he called his “golden college days”.
“Let me paint you a picture.” He started, throwing a heavy arm around your shoulder. You scowled in return, trying and failing to shrug him off.
“I don’t wanna hear it, Cheol.”
“Yes you do. Now listen-”
And you would listen. Because despite the premise sounding ridiculous, he did manage to enthrall you. Often his stories would be embarrassing Mingyu moments, which you cracked up at while your brother whined at him to stop. Seungcheol would just grin down at you, dimples interrupting the smoothness of his porcelain skin, eyes like crescent moons.
If he hadn’t started dating so soon after, you might have developed a little bit of a crush on this grown up, confident version of him.
“Alright.” You slap your hands on your thighs before standing up and stretching. “What do you want for dinner? My treat.”
He raises a thick eyebrow at you. “Absolutely not.”
“You don’t want dinner?” You frown.
“I do. But you’re not paying.”
You roll your eyes, both of you starting your walk to the parking lot. “Come off it. I’m a grown woman.”
“I know. You’re still not paying.”
You give in, because there’s no arguing with Seungcheol. He is stubborn to a fault almost, especially when he wants to get his way. Restaurants seem like too much of a hassle so you opt for fast food, picking up food at a drive thru and then eating in your car. Waiting to get home would mean the food would get cold. Neither of you want to risk it.
“Who was that guy you were talking to at the camp?” You ask him as you hold your burger out for him to pour more of the side sauce on.
“What guy?” He asks, drizzling it on before going back to his own food. His voice is muffled from the bite he took.
“Baseball cap. Kinda long-ish hair?”
Recognition passes over his features. “Oh, that was Jeonghan. He works with Legal at your hospital.”
You smile teasingly. “Aw, you made a friend.”
Seungcheol pulls a face at you. “Am I your kid? Cut it out.”
You continue, goading him. “You had such a big day. Got out of the house, made a friend.”
He shoves you playfully, and you laugh. He’s grinning, and you know you haven’t gone too far. Seungcheol loves playful ribbing. It’s his favorite way of joking around.
“You’re an ass.” He mutters, shaking his head in exasperation. You stick your tongue out at him.
After the meal, Seungcheol begins claiming about feeling stuffy as you drive home, and you suggest that you two go for a walk when you get back and park the car. He agrees, and you find yourself trudging down the sidewalk, breathing in the cool air. It’s still warm enough during the days to make you sweat, but the nights are gradually getting colder, and you revel in the goosebumps forming on your skin.
“Is that new?” Seungcheol points to the shop next to the corner one, a small nook that is advertising hotpot and noodles. You tilt your head in confusion.
“I think it is. I don’t recognize it.”
He sighs. “Oh man. I’m gonna miss the bakery.”
You hum, thinking back to the little place that you loved grabbing donuts, muffins and coffee at. “Their chocolate fudge brownies were so good.”
He groans. “Stop, my mouth is watering. I used to come here so often.”
You two stare at the new blaring neon sign for a little while longer. You remember distinctly when Seungcheol would pick up sweet treats from the bakery on his way to visit Mingyu, and you by extension. He would complain that his gym efforts were going to waste while simultaneously shoving a brownie into his mouth. You would scold him for having no self control while doing the same.
It’s funny. It feels like a lifetime ago.
“What happened, Cheol?” You speak into the quiet dark, standing illuminated by the hotpot place. He doesn’t ask for clarification on what you mean. It seems he already knows.
“I think about that every day.” His voice is soft. “She just….. checked out. Said she didn’t know if she wanted to get married to me.”
You suppress a scoff. “Thats ridiculous. Who else would she marry if not you?”
He shrugs, but doesn’t say anything.
“I know you still love her, but this is completely on her. She broke you guys up for no good reason. She always knew you wanted marriage at some point. So what was the point of getting engaged just to let you go?”
He still doesn’t speak, but does put a hand on your back, coaxing you to turn around so you can begin your slow walk back. He seems to mull over his words, before finally vocalizing them.
“I go back and forth between being angry and upset.” He mutters. “I keep trying to think about what exactly I did. What the last straw was.”
You grip his forearm tight, enough to make him look at you. You give him a stern look.
“Don’t you dare blame yourself. You’re the whole package, Choi Seungcheol. It’s not your fault that she can’t see that.”
He shrugs again, staring at the ground as he walks. You don’t say anything more. You’ve made your feelings perfectly clear. He can do with it what he wants to. Or he can do nothing at all. Deep down, you pray that today is a stepping stone to him getting back to normal life again. You make a mental note to tell Mingyu to ask Seungcheol to go to the gym together. Given his momentum, he might actually say yes.
………………………
The worst thing about working in healthcare is the gaps it creates in your social life.
Like right now, for example. After the night where Seungcheol talked to you about his feelings (sort of), you don’t see him for a week, since you have two 24 hour shifts in between regular working hours, and only have the day off six days later. You see him fleetingly, once in the morning on your way to work when he is already on a Zoom work meeting in the kitchen. He waves to you briefly but doesn’t say anything, and you bustle out of the house soon after. You often see him and Mingyu on the couch after you get back home, watching sports and stuffing their faces full of whatever Mingyu had cooked. You would decline their offers to hang out, saying you were too tired, walking straight into your room.
The most significant of these encounters was on Thursday morning, after a particularly terrible night call wherein you couldn’t sleep for even a single minute, and you came back home only to not even make it to your bed. You collapse on the couch, and you don’t even remember when exactly you fell asleep, but you remember clearly feeling your body suspended, warm on one side, and realise moments later that someone is carrying you. You blink up blearily at Seungcheol’s jaw, the only thing you can properly see, until he kicks open your door and sets you on the bed.
You let him pull a blanket over you, even taking the care to tuck you in. And it’s only when you wake up again that you register the fact that he put you to bed. Even though he could’ve easily just left you on the couch with a blanket over you.
It makes your heart skip a bit.
Once the busy week finally winds down and you have two days off, you take an everything shower, spending hours in the bathroom doing what you call self care but should be considered basic hygiene if your work didn’t treat you like an animal. When you walk into the kitchen feeling fresh and light, like you had washed pounds of grime off you, you find Seungcheol setting a heavy dish of stir fried chicken and vegetables on the counter. You give him an impressed look.
“You cooked?”
“Don’t get used to it.”
Something in your brain scratches, like this conversation already happened.
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” You reply. “Did Mingyu die or something? How come you’re cooking?”
“He had to go on that work conference thing, remember?”
You blink, trying to recall the faraway memory of Mingyu telling you about some out of state thing. “Sure.”
You eat and catch up with Seungcheol, who whines about how bad your schedule is. It’s an old complaint for him, one that started shortly after you began clinicals in med school, and continues on to this day.
“Can’t wait for you to complete residency so you can have fewer hours.” He mumbles, pushing green peppers to the edge of his plate, clearly to be ignored. You reach over and stab them on your fork, devouring them. Seungcheol doesn’t like green pepper, while you don’t like radish. It’s a fair trade for both of you whenever the need arises.
You don’t register that he put something in the food that he clearly doesn’t like but he knows you love.
“I have the next two days off.” You tell him as a sort of peace offering. He rolls his eyes.
“After they basically ran you over with a tractor the entire week?”
You only smile, continuing to placate him. “In any case, I have two days. What do you wanna do?”
He hums contemplatively while he eats. “Bowling?”
“Hell no. Nothing physical. I’m too tired.”
“Bowling isn’t physical.”
“Yes it is. How about we just do a movie marathon?”
He scrunches his nose. “I’ll fall asleep.”
“Even better. Get some rest while you do it.”
He laughs and finishes up, taking both his empty plate and yours to the sink. “No chance. Put your shoes on, lazy ass. We’re going out.”
You groan. “Please not bowling.”
He forces you up from the chair by grabbing your arms. “Okay, no bowling. We’ll do something else.”
Something else turned out to be just walking through the city until you ended up at a gelato place, both of you sharing a small cup just for the taste of it, since you were still full. Both of you talked the entire time, and you learned that he had started going to the gym again, as well as hanging out with Jeonghan, who he had apparently gelled with pretty well. You made a remark about being a proud mom seeing her son grow up, for which he put you in a headlock and didn’t let you go until you declared loudly that Seungcheol is the nicest, most handsome guy you’ve ever met.
“You’re five years old.” You scowl at him once he lets you go, smoothing down your hair. “Five.”
Within the next hour, you decide to watch a movie at the theatre, finding some sequel to a movie neither of you had ever heard of. Ten minutes in, you realise why the franchise was basically unknown: it sucked ass. For the next hour, you two just whispered and giggled about every stupid thing that happened, and when it was time for intermission, you bailed.
One convenience store run later, you are back at home, camped once more in front of the TV. The sun had set already, and with its departure came a soothing calm. You are reminded again of the lingering fatigue in your bones, surprisingly not made worse by your day of activity.
Seungcheol is usually right about these things.
He’s sprawled now on the couch, long limbs stretched out until his feet are propped on the coffee table. Your own feet are in his lap, largely ignored until you kick him in the stomach with one. He grunts at the impact and scowls, but begins rubbing them anyway. You sigh in satisfaction.
Naturally, your eyelids begin to droop again, warm under the blanket and under the delicious pressure of Seungcheol’s fingertips digging into your sole. You’re still tired, you really think you’ll be tired for the rest of your life at the rate you’re going. You’re almost sinking into sleep when you feel Seungcheol move your feet gently off his lap and stand up. You keep your eyelids closed, not having even an ounce of energy to move, but are roused again when two thick arms slip under your back and your knees, lifting you up.
“We’re making this a habit now?” You pipe up.
Seungcheol curses and startles at your words, and you nearly shriek when his arms loosen for just a slight second before gripping you impossibly tight. You cling to him, heart beating a million times a minute, glaring up at him.
“If you dropped me I would’ve killed you!”
“You scared the crap out of me!” He retorts. “I thought you were asleep, jeez.”
He carries you to your room regardless while you will your breathing to slow down. You are pretty sure you would fracture a hip bone if he dropped you, and you only wrap your arms around his shoulders harder. You don’t stop even when he lowers and you feel your ass connect with your mattress.
“C’mon. Let go.”
You pull away just enough to glare at him. You open your mouth to retort, likely to say something snarky, when you realise how close you are to him. The tip of your nose almost brushes his cheek, and your senses are invaded by the scent of his signature cologne. Your breath stutters just a bit, and when Seungcheol turns his head to stare back at you, his lips brush over yours.
You’re not sure if it’s you who pushes just a smidge closer or him, but when your lips finally meet his, it feels like every muscle in your body seizes up. Your arms tighten around his neck at the sensation, and you feel him audibly suck in a sharp breath at the feeling. The hand holding your waist squeezes a bit, and something in your core stirs.
Slowly, Seungcheol lowers you more on the bed, planting his free hand on the side of your head and one knee next to your hip. His lips never leave yours, moving and pressing deeper with a hunger you didn’t anticipate. He seems to envelop you whole, until you can’t breathe, and when you do try to sharply inhale, you are hit with his scent only, and the heat that radiates from your bodies.
It quickly accelerates when you feel not only your own wetness pool between your legs, but also Seungcheol’s slowly growing erection, pressing insistently on the outside of your thigh. You force one leg out from under him, using it to wrap around his waist and tug him down to grind against you. He groans at the feeling, so deep and throaty that you can almost feel the gush from your hole at the sound. Your heart stutters, and you can’t stop the needy whine that escapes your throat in response.
It seems to snap Seungcheol out of the haze surrounding you two, and he pulls away, breathless, to look down at you. His pupils are blown, the brown of his eyes confined to the very edges, and his cheeks are flushed a pretty pink just under his eyes.
“Are you sure about this?” His voice has dropped a couple of octaves, and you can’t get over how hot he sounds. You nod furiously, pulling him down again because just the thought of parting from his lips for this long is painful. He moans immediately when your mouths connect, not hesitating in pushing his tongue against your own slick one. His hips grind against yours, and his hard on feels so good that you nearly sigh in relief.
“W-we should think about this.” He mumbles into your lips, but his hands are running feverishly over your sides, digging hard into the plush of your hips until you are bucking up into him. You scrunch his shirt in your hands before tugging it up, and Seungcheol removes himself from you long enough for you to toss it off. His lips meet your jaw, the skin under your ear, and chills run down your spine.
Clothes are quick to fly off after that, until the cold air is nipping on both your naked bodies, though you don’t care at all. You feel like you’re on fire, eyes running greedily over large expanses of smooth skin, hands feeling the hard planes of his muscles, how they contract and react to your touch. His lips never leave your body once, as if determined to leave your skin colored in various shades of maroon and purple. You use your leg to tug his hips closer to you again, and his length slides through your slit, leading both of you to moan loudly.
You thank every god in the universe that Mingyu isn’t home.
When he slides in, it’s like being impaled alive. Your eyes roll up at how wonderfully he fills you, how it feels like you are being stuffed to the brim. Your toes curl when he bottoms out, his shaft brushing deliciously over a spot inside you that craved being pleasured. He sounds like a wreck above you, voice trembling and cracking as he curses and gasps. The muscles of his back are taut, moving solidly under the touch of your palms. You run your hands over him as you adjust to the feeling of how thick he is, and you’re barely ready when he pulls out and pushes back in. You don’t even have it in yourself to be embarrassed about the filthy squelching sound your cunt makes, especially not when Seungcheol moans and bites down hard on your neck, grinding his pelvis into your clit. Electricity shoots up from your core, making you arch into him.
“You feel so good, holy shit.” He grinds again. “I need to fuck you so hard.”
“What’s stopping you?” You sound whiny and breathless, and it makes him chuckle.
“Fine. You asked for this.”
His pace is vicious, and he pours every ounce of that impressive strength he possesses into ramming you through the mattress. You keen and sob, nearly unable to even draw a breath in at the feeling of his cock dragging through your walls at a punishing pace. He is rough with it, fingers winding through the hair closest to your scalp and tugging hard, making your back arch up so your neck is on full display to him. He uses that opportunity to suck another mark into your already large collection, and it feels almost like nothing when all your focus is on how his cock feels, glorious and girthy, fitting snug inside you like a glove yet sliding through with minimum resistance owing to how you’re dripping all over him and likely down on the sheets as well.
When he pulls back enough to look down at you, you go nearly cross eyed at the sight of him, forehead shiny with sweat, some hair sticking to it while the rest falls down over his face. His lips are abused raw and a dark red, and you bite back the urge to kiss him again. He is breathing heavily, grunting and moaning with every other thrust. His hands hook under your knees to spread you open more, and his cock slides impossibly deeper. Your core tightens more, and you squeeze your eyes shut.
“Cheol, ‘m gonna cum.”
The corner of his lips tug up in a smirk, eyes hazy with lust as he takes in your bent, sweaty, writhing body. “Cum on my cock, baby. Go on.”
And you do. You gasp and arch up, body locking around his, nails digging into his biceps strongly enough to leave crescent shaped marks in the skin, as waves of pleasure spread through your body, leaving you trembling under him. He keeps going until you’ve ridden through every remnant of your high, before pulling out and shooting ropes of his cum over your stomach, painting the skin white. His hand moves furiously over his shaft as he groans and curses, eyebrows furrowed and bottom lip trapped between his teeth. He is a sight to behold, and you admire him as his body finally relaxes, breaths coming hard and fast. His gaze meets yours, and both your lips tug up into identical, dopey smiles.
Seungcheol helps you sit up a few moments later, offering to clean you up but you simply shake your head, taking his hand to lead him out of the bedroom and straight into the bathroom. He doesn’t seem even slightly embarrassed when it takes only a few kisses and touches to make him hard again. He just turns you around, pressing your front into the tiles of the shower wall, tugging on your hips so your ass sticks out, before he is driving home again, making you sigh in satisfaction.
How is it possible to already be addicted to this feeling? To the sounds of his low moans as his lips brush against the shell of your ear, the sparks shooting up your spine when his hand snakes around you and his fingers find your clit with no hesitation, pulling another orgasm out of you and holding you up as you squirm in his arms, finishing on your back and muttering praises about how sexy you look, how you were made to be covered in his cum, filthy musings that his lust addled mind keeps babbling out. By the time you’re done cleaning up, you’re giggling and messing around like he was always meant to be there. Like your life had a Seungcheol shaped gap that he readily and naturally filled.
He’s all you think about when you go into work after the weekend. Smiling to yourself as you remember the two blissful days of cuddles, kisses, laughs and making love over every surface of the apartment.
Was it making love? Do you have any feelings for him remotely like love? You care for him a lot, obviously. He had been a part of your life since you knew what life really was. You two have obvious chemistry. He likes to banter with you often, and you are comfortable with him. Him living with you and Mingyu feels almost normal. There is no feeling of being intruded upon, like Seungcheol being there is the most natural thing in the world.
It is also a fact that he is insanely attractive. He had always been, as puberty came and went, filling his muscles out and shaping his face. He carries himself with an air of surety and confidence you hardly see in people. His features are sultry, almost romantic, and you had spent a good part of the last day admiring how beautiful he looked in the throes of passion, mouth parted slightly, eyebrows furrowed, eyes glazed over, dark brown pools of desire.
There is the sex too.
Seungcheol holds you like separation from your body causes him physical pain. Moans into your mouth like you’re pulling his soul out of its home. Kisses you like he is breathing the air coming straight from your lungs. Fucks you like it’s his last time bringing another human being to completion. Just the thought of him leaves you breathless.
Maybe you are in love. And you really, really need to talk to Seungcheol about where you guys stand.
The week is brutal, no surprises there, and you see Seungcheol only fleetingly in between, and always with Mingyu around, so you don’t do anything apart from greeting him. You do notice his lingering gaze on you, and it makes you smile to yourself. Once, when Mingyu’s back is turned, he gives you a cheeky wink. You purse your lips and send him a kiss. The childishness of it all makes you giggle.
After your last 24 hour shift of the week, you get home to find Mingyu making breakfast in the kitchen, dressed in a nice button up shirt, obviously ready to leave for work soon.
“Where’s Seungcheol?” You ask, dropping your bag heavily on the counter to stretch. Your joints crack, and you wonder once more how long you would live at this rate.
Mingyu tenses up at the question, a strange reaction that only piques your interest.
“Guess who called him last night.” He says in response.
Something in your chest cracks, but you don’t dare let yourself believe it. “Who?”
“Jiyu.”
And it shatters.
You don’t know if Mingyu notices the devastation on your face or if he’s too distracted by the eggs now sputtering in the pan. He sighs, and you can hear the exasperation in his voice.
“Honestly, it’s frustrating. Going back to her after the shit she pulled? I can’t believe him.”
“So he’s not here?” Your voice feels hollow, grating.
“No. He left last night.”
You let out a shaky breath. Then you turn around, and shuffle into your room.
You don’t bother changing before laying down on the cold sheets. A bad idea, considering you’ve been in these clothes for the better part of 24 hours. But your mind feels like it is submerged in ice cold water, and your body refuses to do anything except shut down. You think back to less than a week ago, when Seungcheol had intertwined his fingers with yours, moaning in unison with you as you both reached your highs on this very bed.
You don’t cry. You don’t think you can. Instead, you let your tired body coax your mind into closing up as well, sinking into the blissful oblivion of sleep.
…………………………..
There’s noises outside your bedroom door.
Your brain is still numb with sleep, but you focus on Mingyu and Seungcheol’s voices, the latter making you flinch. You can’t make out any of the words, only relying on tones. For some reason, Mingyu doesn’t sound frustrated with his best friend at all. You would think Mingyu would tear into him the moment he came back, but it doesn’t sound like it.
You can hear footsteps getting louder, eyes flying shut when the door to your room gently opens. You stay incredibly still, and moments later, the door shuts again. You sigh and straighten in bed, staring at the ceiling.
You really don’t have it in you to talk to Seungcheol. You have barely processed everything yourself, not being able to reconcile the time you had spent together with him turning around and going back to his ex. Your phone hums next to your pillow, and you squint at the screen.
[cheol]: we need to talk when u wake up
You roll your eyes despite being alone, dropping your phone with the text still unanswered. Talk, your ass. You don’t deserve this.
The rest of your day is spent rotting in bed, and you know no one will disturb you with how grueling your routine usually is. You drift in and out of sleep, your conscious hours spent mulling over everything that has happened.
Shockingly, you miss Seungcheol. Even more shockingly, you don’t cry. You just float in your uneasy sadness, and with every passing minute, you accept that your bliss with him was only temporary, as most beautiful things usually are.
