Chasing Moonbeams

Introvert. Coffee addict. Feral for men who could kill me, but actually are cinnnamon rolls.

[frownyalfred]

local mob boss, puffing on a cigarette angrily:

goon:

Batman, tied to a chair six feet away:

mob boss: did ya have to tie him to the chair with his legs spread open like that?

[frownyalfred]

[mostly-frayed-edges]

[eategg24]

they;re gonna give me an extra row of teeth bc ive been good

[i-give-you-a-fish]

You get a Leopard Shark

Triakis semifasciata

[littlecrowkitten]

looks like he could kill you🔪🔪

is actually a cinnamon roll🥺🥺

But could still kill you🤣🤣🫶🫶

The way his eyes are so expressive and can go from 😡 to 🥺

hard to believe this is the leader of Onichynus sometimes😫😫

[restinpiss]

[official-lucifers-child]

[thickness-protection-program]

It's more likely than you think

[lichrelly]

things i’ll not call you a whore for:

sexual activity

how you dress

things i’ll call you a whore for:

stealing my food 

stealing my lemons

my cat likes you more than me

[bill-nye-official-blog]

why are lemons separate from food op?

[sporkkles-irl]

everyone knows lemons arent food

[2boldlyqueer]

lemon stealing whores are a huge issue separate from food stealing whores. there’s a whole documentary about whores stealing lemons from the trees of unsuspecting victims. you can see the first two minutes of it here.

[bad-puns-n-finger-guns]

Thats a rickroll. That totally is a fucking rickroll. No fukin way. Not falling for it.

[lichrelly]

dude, trust me, that isn’t a rick roll. its something worse

[bad-puns-n-finger-guns]

Me to the rest of tumblr after actually watching what was in the link:

[incessant-honking]

…I really don’t know what I was expecting.

[danna-sama]

What the fuck did i just watch.

[askasexual]

It- it’s not a Rick roll

[theprinceofsnark]

Have we really reached a time when the Lemon Stealing Whores are no longer common knowledge.

[hiddlydiddly]

[oscar-isaac]

THE LOST WORLD: JURASSIC PARK 1997 | dir. Steven Spielberg

[the-crow-in-the-blooming-tree]

[goddamnshinyrock]

just asked the barista for a “12 inch” latte rather than “12 ounce” latte, tried to correct myself, and did it again.

I’m alive awake alert enthusiastic today, clearly

[creekfiend]

BARKEEP GIMME THE FOOTLONG

[daily-spooky]

[intercal]

I'm so mentally stable you can park a horse in my brain

[vampireopossum]

[charlataninred]

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

[meraarts]

Might I add:

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child

The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

[eater-of-hopes-and-dreams]

The adventures of a space roomba

Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)

I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head

[blitzlowin]

hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):

The God of Arepo (graphic novel 1 / 2 / 3) (ebook)

The Monster of Sentan

The Witch’s Cat

Raise Both Children

Stabby the Roomba (honorable mention)

Cinderella Marries the Prince (comic)

My Arch Nemesis Cynthia

Pirates and Mermaid

Eindred and the Witch

The Demon King

The Cornerwitch

Grandmother Beetroot

Apocalypse Daycare Worker

Grandmother Accidentally Summons a Demon

New Year Saga

A Story About Changelings

Ranger in the King’s Forest

The Difference Between a Hare and a Rabbit

Goblin Men (Canines)

[charlataninred]

I am in love with you /p

[the-thread-of-the-infinite]

What about the one with the princess locked in a tower learning to become a wizard? That’s lived in my mind for years and I haven’t seen it in a long time

[death-of-the-endless]

Oh, love that story, adding it to the list: 20. Princess Talia and adding a few more contenders 21. Thyme 22. The Monster under the Bed 23. A Meaningful Death 24. Humans are unstoppable…until they aren’t 25. The Monster under the Fridge 26. Antler Guy 27. Cleric slamming healing spells

[death-of-the-endless]

Adding a few more I remembered:  28. The Frog and the Scorpion 29. HSTHETE 30. The First Witch in the World 31. Imagine that Oceans were replaced by Forests  32. A Faerie taking a Name  33. The Dragon on the Farm  34. Synovus & Menace  35. Raising the Anti-Christ  36. Aliens vs. Flora & Fauna of Earth (pretty sure there are even more additions to the original post but I had this one saved)  37. Doctors without Borders…in Space!  38. The Villain-Wrangler  39. The Last Contact  40. The 100 Parent-Point Children  41. And the Heavens Wept  42. The Night Gentleman  43. The Serpent God and their Priestess 

[knottahooker]

44. No One Showed Up for the Last Storytime

[adamskiiii]

Wow! @writing-prompt-s contributing to like half of these!

[writing-prompt-s]

I can hardly take any credit for these stories! But I love sharing them. Unfortunately I cannot read all the prompt responses so please tag me if you want me to reblog a story that resonated with you so I can give it a little boost :)

[tikkety-tok]

This is what Rasputin would've wanted.

[teaboot]

I feel like I'm being seduced like one of those fancy rainforest birds

[fruitpilled]

is it working

[teaboot]

Yes

[magnuspool]

[heytatertot]

@nathanwpyle

I literally love this.

I couldn't stop laughing for 20 minutes.

No joke.

[meg-moira]

This has the same energy as a writer desperately trying to make their insanely cool but devastatingly off the wall plot point work with the rest of the story

[daily-spooky]

[ur-daily-inspiration]

These Tiled Steps In San Francisco Glow At Night From The Moonlight

[lanndscape]

[icarus-daedaluss]