History / Poetry

• Finch • Geno Malkin is the ONLY bitch alive •

[strongmadge]

as president of baz nation some of yall need to take a step back and understand that trauma is a significant thing and baz went through two to three (depending on if you're counting smurfs general emotional manipulation and her grooming as different types) different types of major trauma very young

cant be going "oh the cody brothers deserve better." then in the same breath disregard baz as ireedemable and evil to the core when in reality his trauma just manifested in ways that didn't make him a perfect victim.

if you can ignore everything the rest of the cody brothers did at their worst points, then it's a shame that you can't give baz the same grace even to admit he's a nuanced character

[animalkingdomdaily]

Baz Blackwell: 2x08 “Grace”

[animalkingdomdaily]

Baz Blackwell: 2x11 “The Leopard”

[sonpat-rides-again]

[ihavenocluewhatiwanttobecalled]

Can someone who understands psychology explain why this makes someone "rude"?

[alex51324]

Phatic discourse, a subset of affiliative signaling.

When Co-workers do things like ask about weekend plans, chat about non-work topics, eat lunch in the same room, they are--subconsciously--reaffirming that they are part of a cooperative (or, minimally, non-antagonistic) social group.

The other primates cement social bonds by grooming each other; we do it by making small talk.

If they solicit your participation in these rituals, and you repeatedly refuse those bids, you are marking yourself out as, at best, an outsider to the group, and thus potentially antagonistic.

This is all happening on the monkey-brain level; they have no idea what they're doing or how they are interpreting your response, so there's no way to clear up the misunderstanding.

To the ape sleeping in your co-worker's DNA, either you are part of the grooming circle, or you are an outsider who, for all it knows, may be coming to steal all the bananas.

Even if you would prefer not to socialize with your co-workers, it's generally worth it to set aside 5 minutes a couple times a week for phatic communication. You don't have to answer your co-workers' affiliative signals every time, but it's less trouble in the long run if you respond to a few of them.

[punkrorschach]

if you are the type of person who really just wants to be left alone to do their work in quiet: it is actually easier to achieve this as part of the in-group. when you enter a new space, in this case, a job, make it your GOAL to make everyone Know Who You Are. introduce yourself to everyone you meet. literally everyone. "hi I'm Jack I'm New." this helps burst the awkward bubble. you are now one of the monkeys.

at some point, either in response to an invitation, or just in the natural course of conversation, you can add in that you are a "quiet type" who "needs their silence" or what have you. customize to your personal needs. i find it helpful to imagine a well dressed elderly woman describing the sort of peace she needs to manifest.

roughly once a week if you see a group of people chatting, engage with them. keep it pleasant. it can be superficial. word will travel that you are Nice and Quiet and Not The Chatty Type protecting you from group lunches etc. if you have an office with a door that you keep closed a lot, putting up any kind of decor will also send positive signals.

humans are monkeys! for better or worse!

[tlbodine]

Pro tip: try to make a note (write it down if you have to) about some inconsequential thing that your coworker mentions so you can ask about it later. Kids and pets are great for This. As are hobbies. One guy in my office zoom called in from his house and I saw he had an arcade game in his office so I asked him about it later and he lit up like a Christmas tree. Another coworker has a pet pig and I ask every couple months how the pig is doing. This is a great strategy for pivoting conversation away from you and will make them think you are the friendliest monkey in the pod.

[queeranarchism]

The grooming circle also serves a very practical purpose. Getting to know each other - even superficially but regularly - makes people more likely to feel comfortable asking for something they need, more likely to say yes, and more likely to trust each other with sensitive information. All of this makes people better fellow human beings to each other.

It means my coworker is more likely to feel safe enough to tell me "Can you take over my shift tomorrow?" and I'm more likely to say "yes" even when I don't want to, because I care about his well being and he also takes over shifts for me when he doesn't want to.

It means my coworker is more likely to ask me for help if they experience sexual harassment at work, or if they think they're being underpaid, or if they're actually very lonely and need someone, anyone, to go to their Mom's funeral with them.

And maybe this ritual of trust-building feels unnecessary to you. Maybe you would do all these things for random strangers, but your coworkers won't know that unless they get to know you a little, so they won't know that they can ask you for help.

[queeranarchism]

#take part in the grooming. become one of the ingroup. band together to demand more bananas from your zookeeper aka your boss#monkey together strong or something

YES. Unionize your monkey grooming circle.

[capnsoapy]

good grief, i cannot recall the today's date! perhaps yvette nicole brown can help me out,

[windup-angel]

[egberts]

the monkey's paw curled but i was faster and now we are holding hands

[dogpuppy]

[jakemorph]

WHO ARE YOU FUCKING PEOPLE

[dogpuppy]

[corpsecowboy]

i get to see sturgeon every weekend so i made this:)

[bakedbakermom]

[spelldealer]

the entire california central valley is experiencing silent hill in real life right now by the way

[spelldealer]

400 mile long fog cloud be upon ye

[dogpuppy]

[officialfoxsquadron]

audiences have no idea how to be uncomfortable anymore

[officialfoxsquadron]

watch movies that make you uncomfortable read books that make you uncomfortable go to plays that make you uncomfortable watch tv that makes you uncomfortable look at paintings and sculpture and artwork that makes you uncomfortable. it is spiritually and morally and ethically and artistically really really good for you. think about why you are uncomfortable. what biases do you bring to art? what biases does the art bring to you? how do you reconcile this? how does your worldview grow and expand and change? all this and more will be answered and available to you if you just engage with art that does not coddle you and treats you like an intelligent human being that can sit through discomfort

[mediocrgatsby]

a couple years ago I visited Collection de l’Art Brut, a museum in Lausanne that features art created by outsiders in society (prisoners, psych ward patients, disabled people, recluses, etc)

many pieces I would deem “conventionally attractive,” but there were many pieces that also made me uncomfortable; despite it, this is still one of the greatest and most memorable museums I’ve visited

the post above is speaking truths

[sophibeans]

no I don't have "misophonia" I have the Princess's Temperament. now stop fucking chewing with your mouth open or you're going to the dungeon.

[jeffament]

im zen im literally so mindful and zen

[purpleisdebeste]

I’m sorry Orpheus i was too harsh on you…

[purpleisdebeste]

i was in the physics lab today and we were working with lasers, so the Lab Freaks (legal name) were being very careful to stress that we Do Not Turn Around or Look Behind Us because we’ll get extremely blinded by the power of high strength lasers

and i’m not gonna lie it was actually extremely hard to resist turning around. i misjudged orpheus it turns out this isnt extremely easy actually

[purpleisdebeste]

okay i’ll be honest i 100% looked back at the lasers. actually multiple separate lasers multiple different times. they were pretty

and i didnt get blinded. so clearly lab safety isnt real and you should always risk it cus taking risks is awesome #gambling

but uh. my ass is NOT making it out of the underworld 🔥🔥🔥

[overnightshipping]

[ovur]

Now give the donkey a drink of pure wine..... to wash down the figs..!