Enjoy the chaos!

Eternally exhausted Pigeon. Scientist. 29 years old and stuck here since 2012. She/her. Terfs can fuck right off.

[midnightssea]

it’s amazing how women are able to navigate crowded rooms without ever touching a palm to a man’s lower back

[quendergeer]

you'd think occasionally men would need to touch other men like this to manoeuvre them out of the way but it never happens

[homunculus-argument]

The possibility of me emotionally reacting to air pressure changes, and my boyfriend having an allergic reaction to ground spores makes a funny concept. You know it's going to rain when the way he starts sneezing makes me want to tell him to shut the fuck up.

[unclefather]

having pussy is gender neutral. having cock is gender neutral. having tits is gender neutral. using 3 in one body wash, shampoo and conditioner is for men though

[wildgeese98]

THE EGGS YOU GAVE ME ALL DIED AND YOU LIED TO ME SO I DID THE IMPLANTATION MYSELF YOU SELF-SERVING ZOMBIE

My mother used the resultant power to modify her ovum on a chromosomal level, so thanergy ignition wouldn’t compromise the embryo. She did this so I would be a necromancer.

Pelleamena and her 200 dead children. Wake and her bomb. I've been thinking about them and their pregnancies. The lengths they both went to to conceive babies meant to preserve their people's future. One child to keep the tomb sealed forever, one to break it open.

[fairyinthetrees]

going with the flow in a face down in a river kinda way

[a-book-of-creatures]

Is it socially acceptable to use opaque watercolors, or is that considered gouache?

[yugirimistwalker]

The trolley is about to run over all sentient life in the galaxy. You cannot switch the tracks, but you can still save everyone’s lives by pulling one of three levers, all of which involve sacrificing yourself. The red lever will destroy all trolleys, but will also kill you as well as all public transportation across the galaxy. The blue lever will merge your own consciousness with all trolleys, allowing you to control them and stop the trolley from running everyone over. The green lever will use your body as a catalyst to synthesize organic life and public transportation together - organic life will no longer be stuck in the cycle of creating public transportation that rebels against its creators, and both forms of life will finally be free.

[whirligig-girl]

[wordfather]

i am not immune to a well choreographed fight scene with a fun song in the background

[midnightcrows]

"I forgive you everything, Lord," she whispered. And she slid her hands inside him.

Edit: had to update this one too 👍

Original below + alt with a black circle

[neunhofferart]

Nearly pissed myself laughing earlier when I saw this absolute Looney Tunes truck attempting to transport an oversized mattress down the road with only a couple tiny bungee cords holding on for dear life, while it ballooned out behind the truck like a drag racing parachute:

[laropasucia]

[parkchanwoohoo]

[yellow-cat]

pride flag for nonbinary asexual aromantic individuals that just says "not gonna do all that"

[ach-sss-no]

when brandon sanderson talks about villains in his famous free youtube writing class video lectures he'll say 'what's the difference between gollum and sauron' and of course he means the villain that's present in the narrative and characterized in a way the audience can potentially relate to or sympathize with vs. the looming threatening anonymous far-off force (among other things). but every time he asks that i think 'well one of those guys tracked down frodo and got his ring back'

[mysteryteacup]

Brandon Sanderson: What's the difference between Gollum and Sauron?

OP: Skill issue.

[merinnan]

[rockelyn]

[nealashitposts]

A year or so ago I went to wood carving club with a bruised eye from my dog slamming his nose into my eyesocket and like every old lady there pulled me aside at some point to ask if my partner hit me here are some of the solutions they had in case he did.

-Replacing his vitimens with poision

- getting her brother to invite him out onto his boat and then killing him and dumping him in the ocean and saying he got drunk and fell off.

- get tboned with him in the passenger seat and then once he was in the hospital theres all kinds of easy ways to kill him like not washing my hands after a poop and then touching his wound casually.

-replacing his drink of choice with moonshine!?

- take him on a hike thats locally notorious for a rapid otter attacking hikers and once he had rabies I could just kill him any ol way and say self defense.

-One lady just cheerfully informed me she had a gun and only a few years left anyway

[janedrewfinally]

Accurate tags:

#and this is why no-fault divorce brings down the murder rate

[fliesinthescreen]

mom called me a fag yesterday by accident

[fliesinthescreen]

she was going to call me a bitch (playful) and i saw her gears turning like no but he's trans i need to call him the male equivalent. and then say fag and look so so surprised at the word that came out of her own mouth. it was like watching someone fail a disco elysium skill check irl

[fliesinthescreen]

AUTHORITY - One of your sons is being annoying to the other. Make it clear that you think this is unfair.

YOU - "Stop being a b--"

REACTION SPEED [Challenging: Success] - Wait a minute.

DRAMA - Sire, the word you're about to use is historically feminine! Applying it to your transgender child is tantamount to misgendering him.

1. [Suggestion - Legendary 14] Think of a masculine equivalent to "bitch."

[spinostarz]

i really like that pictures of anteaters swimming look like someone tried to recreate the loch ness monster on a budget like