suffering to servive

mentally wrecked; scrolling to manage my feelings indigenous | he/them | thirties | gay | divergent bpd \ cptsd \ bipolar \ audhd \ etc\etc fuck this society / eat the rich

[ailurophilerebeccaexists-deacti]

Once I learn how to stop being me it’s over for y’all

[existennialmemes]

Sorry, my prefrontal cortex is running on a dial up modem from 1996. It works very slowly, and if you interrupt it, it just screams and cancels the task it was working on in rage and horror.

[moonlit-positivity]

Its so important to ✨feel your feelings✨ because that's what abuse does- abusers take away your right to feel anything they don't want you to feel. They tell you shit like "you're crazy," "that never happened," and "your anger doesn't matter! I'm more important!" And it's imperative to fight back against that. No one ever has a right to tell you your feelings don't matter. Regardless of who they are, what they've told you, how long you've known them, or how much you care about them. Your feelings are much more important and it's imperative you protect them.

[flawlest]

[sherman8r1138]

You can condemn the actions of a human while still acknowledging their humanity

[mindtroublez]

[love-me-love-my-weirdness]

Shout out to the people who never had a safe place. Who didn’t have a before trauma. Who were loved but not protected. Who were collateral damage in someone else’s breakdown. Who got fucked up so young that they’ll never know who they could have been.

Shout out to people who’ve never felt safe. I hope you do someday.

[sufferingtosurvive]

It’s not fair!

[rainywhispersblog-deactivated20]

[dispiritedfae]

Nobody apologized for how they treated me they just blamed me for how I reacted

[oneandonlypup]

i have quiet bpd, ofc i'd rather hurt myself than others because i dont want to be selfish

[gh0stgirl-hotline]

The worst part about being mentally ill is the fact that you are always alone even around others you always feel like the odd man out that nobody likes you rotting in bed is the the only time you feel safe but after awhile it’s just miserable I want to belong I want to be connected I don’t want to have to put on a mask to be accepted I don’t want to have to take heavy duty drugs just to be able to get out of bed for the rest of my life but it sucks cause no matter how hard I try I’ll never be enough cause even at my best I’m still the worst

[autball]

MASKING MYTHS BUSTED: “Masking = Acting NT.”

FALSE.

Autistic masking does not necessarily mean “pretending to be allistic/neurotypical," although you’d definitely be forgiven for thinking it does.

Non-autistic researchers have been referring to it as “camouflaging” for years, framing it as an intentional choice to suppress autistic traits and replace them with allistic ones in order to “blend in.” Doing an internet search on the term will return several similar results.

But now, Autistic researchers are in the game, and their take is much more nuanced and comprehensive than that. (Funny how that happens, isn’t it?)

They’ve found that:

- It CAN be intentional but is often subconscious and involuntary 

- It is a protective response to trauma and feeling unsafe 

- It is often about suppressing more than just autistic traits 

- It is about identity management and being able to predict how people will treat you, not just “blending in”

Some people will lean into being “the bad kid” because they know that’s what people expect of them. Some people will even act “more autistic” because they know that’s what people expect of them. Others still will do things to attract attention in controllable, more “acceptable” ways to avoid attracting attention in unsafe, more stigmatizing ways. Not because they WANT to be that way, but because it lets them predict people’s responses better, which feels safer.

Also, there are Autistic people who can’t “pass” for non-autistic no matter how hard they try. That doesn’t mean they’re not masking. They may actually be working hard to suppress A LOT, they just can’t do everything to neuronormative standards.

None of these people will be accused of “blending in,” yet they are still masking their hearts out. When we assume they are not, we miss all the harm that masking is causing them. But they are suppressing themselves and suffering the consequences of that just as much as any Autistic person whose mask successfully says, “Hey, I’m just like you!”

(For more on this, please see the work of Dr. Amy Pearson and Kieran Rose.)

[anxietyproblem]

[boopicide]

єνєяутнιηg ιѕ мєαηιηgℓєѕѕ

[youwillleaveme]

my bpd is like a constant fight to stay calm and act normal, just for social purposes. the amount of times i just wanted to cry, yell or break things in public, it’s like every fvcking day but i hold it back until i can’t anymore

i don’t want ppl to see how i actually feel and behave, i can’t risk that they don’t like me anymore for who i rlly am

[youthincare]

Rich people get therapy Poor people go to jail Rich people get empathy and help Poor people get lectures and scoffs Rich people enjoy drugs recreationally Poor people suffer from substance use Rich people deal with illness Poor people die from illness Rich people sacrifice their time Poor people sacrifice their lives Rich people go into detox Poor people wait for detox Rich people watch their heath Poor people watch their budget Rich people become independent Poor people become "selfish" Rich people watch their stress Poor people watch their community Rich people create art Poor people create "slang"

"Why are people who live in poverty disproportionately affected by mental illness?

Research shows that mental illness reduces employment and therefore income, and that psychological interventions generate economic gains.

Negative economic shocks cause mental illness

Antipoverty programs such as cash transfers improve mental health.

A crucial step toward the design of effective policies is to better understand the mechanisms underlying these causal effects."

[enki2]