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@sweetlikecherrycola
joining the war on pigeons on the side of pigeons
dude. what did you do. everyone is here.
We are the daughters of ppl who had kids
“Ugh can’t stand babies they cry so much!”
That tiny Human spirit has shat himself 4 times today if you’d shat yourself 4 times by noon you’d be in hysterics too
He fell asleep in his bed, at home, and woke up at the goddamn grocery store with an overhead light in his face if that happened to you you’d become The Joker
Poor guy’s only been here for like a dozen weeks he doesn’t even have a favorite show to distract him yet he’s just raw-dogging reality unfiltered with no goddamn Blorbos to rotate whatsoever
Little guy's trying to process this enormous, unfriendly universe, along with feelings like hunger, clothes, and being too hot/cold, which he's never known before, and he doesn't even have a little dog beside him to which he can say "Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore". You try feeling that overwhelmed and see if you do a better job keeping it together.
I have just learned that Mountain Goats are NOT, in fact, actual Goats.
I have never heard of this band. I AM in fact referring to the animal.
But wait, there’s more!
“the millenium falcon would wipe out the enterprise in seconds” lmao the enterprise is just an innocent science class floating thru space…. all they wanna do is look at some rocks… kiss an alien…. find some space plants….. why would you fight that its not a battleship theyre just nerds…… leave them olone
A friend of mine saw this and brought up some interesting arguments
so, in other words,
Pretty much.
here have some size comparison
Who wins in a fight, a fully staffed Navy research vessel or your local weed man and his best friend in their souped up VW Bus?
tags via @procrastinatorproject
So while it’s true that the Enterprise is not as big as people think, that goes double for the Falcon!
A good way of thinking about the relative size is by using a bridge comparison:
The Enterprise bridge has space for 11 people to work, as well as a significant amount of space between stations to move around comfortably:
[Bridge illustration by Tobias Weinmann via here]
And the whole thing fits in the nipple thing up on top of the saucer:
Meanwhile the Falcon (beloved weed bus) has a cockpit that seats 4, with only 2 main operational stations, and zero floor space:
And since Serenity was mentioned too…
Serenity has a bridge more comparable to La Sirena - with 2 stations at the front and quite a bit of floor space.
And for those interested in a visual comparison:
(Boeing 747 for scale as well as the Delta Flyer because Why Not)
TLDR: The Millennium Falcon is pretty dinky, so I propose *true weed bus status* goes to the excellent smuggling ships of Serenity and La Sirena. The Falcon is herby demoted to man on his weed bicycle with his pet monkey and a gun (to be clear the monkey is Solo)
This is the analysis I am here for
let’s go back to where you call the bridge module a nipple.
I think it sucks that you have to go to so many different kinds of doctor to take care of yourself. It's the 21st century. I should be able to go to a single office where they scan me with a big xerox machine and tell me what I'm allergic to and why my tummy hurts and if I have any cancer or cavities or if my glasses prescription has changed. And then I should get a sticker.
This post contains 12 horses!
To do list: • burst someone's bubble stir the pot • toot my own horn add my 2 cents • skate on thin ice • add fuel to the fire
Posts are selected by humans, processed automatically and queued to post. Click the link for more information about each horse. You can send a link or text to be counted to my ask box.
stepped on a plum (overripe plum) (barefoot) it was on the driveway got out of the car and accidentally (didn't know it was there) stepped on the plum (warm) (on the ground) (it had fallen from the tree) barefoot (no shoes) wearing long pants (too long) (need to hem them) plum viscera got on them (the pants) unexpected plum on the driveway (hot plum) (97 degrees out) already super hungover (throwing up all morning) (should not have been driving at all) and I stepped out of the car (black car) (97 degrees out) and onto the plum (unexpected) (didn't know the plum was there) and it burst (plum nightmare on my only good pair of sweatpants) still we find ways to keep ourselves going from day to day
“I’ve been told by my producer not to do an impression of a peacock” 🦚
i love her
thinking about the time also with some former roommates where one of them half jokingly was like "man i love monday because the kitchen is always spotless because Story cleans it on sunday" and i was like "what are you talking about" and they were like "you deep clean the kitchen every sunday?" and i was like "? no i don't i have absolutely no idea what you mean."
we went back and forth for 30 seconds and it got awkward really fast because it turns out all my other roommates thought i just had a compulsive need or some sort of desire to deep clean the kitchen every sunday and they just left me to it.
when in reality i was meal prepping for the entire week every sunday and when i finished i cleaned up after myself obviously—wiped the counters down, scraped gunk off the stove, scrubbed the sink, and swept the floor.
took me 10 minutes but always left it looking great.
then i didn't use the kitchen the whole rest of the week because i'd just grab my prepped meals in the morning and go out for all-day fieldwork.
but apparently nobody else ever cleaned up after themselves at all when they cooked. like they'd just leave food on the stove and counters and drop shit on the floor etc. and not clean it up so they thought every monday morning the kitchen was "deep cleaned" simply bc there wasn't old food on every surface.
i was like, "...........i've noticed the kitchen is always messy when i use it on sundays but i've always figured someone just used it and didn't get around to cleaning it up yet and i didn't mind because i'm always about to make a mess anyway............y'all just use the kitchen like that all week?"
and one of the guys (very funny, i liked him) looked around and realized I was the only woman* (*closeted at the time) living there and he went "this is really bad, like, optics wise."
"I love it when you deep clean"
The longer it takes for this to come across your dash the funnier it is
Which will fade first? Memories of the Area 51 "raid", or memories of Internet Explorer?
there's been a robbery at the lourve???? please tell me they nicked the mona lisa it would be so fucking funny
i'm talking proper heist movie backflipping over lasers and cutting holes in the ceiling to slowly descend on a wire i want this shit to be FUNNY
nevermind they did something funnier let's chainsaw our way in and then scoot out beep beep that's the sound of my scooter vrmmm vrmmm that's the sound of my tiny chainsaw