It’s been forever since I came on here. Anything interesting happening or did we have a mass exodus to a better place?
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@sweetsci
It’s been forever since I came on here. Anything interesting happening or did we have a mass exodus to a better place?
Hi Aunties! As if we don't have enough going on right now I'm pretty sure my identity has been stolen and a bunch of bologna is following because of that. First things first, my lawyer recommended I pull a credit report. How do I do that and what is a good company you would recommend? After the Equifax mess I'm not quite sure where to turn.
Oh no!!! I’m so sorry, puggle. This fucking sucks. Also, I’ve heard reports that identity theft is at an all-time high right now, so watch out, babies!
You can get your credit report by requesting it at any of the three credit reporting bureaus: Equifax, TransUnion, and Experian. Yes, even after the Equifax mess, they’re still tracking your credit report, and requesting it from them won’t hurt.
I believe Credit Karma also offers this service, but you might have to pay for it. Here’s some more info:
Dashit Just Happened, Equifax?
We haven’t written a lengthy article on identity theft yet, so for now, I trust this one for more info:
https://www.identitytheft.gov/steps
Just to follow up on this, you are allowed 1 free copy of your credit report from each of the major credit reporting companies (Equifax, Experian, and Transunion) every year. So over a 12 month period, you are entitled to three in total for free.
In general, I recommend ordering one per 4 months so that you can monitor changes over time. (The exception is if you are making a big ticket purchase like buying a house and want to order all three at once so you can correct any mistakes before applying for a mortgage).
For most of us who just want to maintain good credit and ensure nothing is going astray, ordering only 1 from a different agency is the best route. For example, every January, I order a credit report from Equifax, every May I order one from Experian, and every September, I order one from Transunion. In this particular case, I would actually recommend ordering the first one and seeing if anything appears as a result of the stolen identity, if so order the others so that you can begin the process of disputing the charges. If not, wait a couple of months and check another one to ensure nothing is wrong.
The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) requires these companies to give you one copy for free and that can be done at: http://www.annualcreditreport.com/
That is the ONLY FTC authorized website to get free credit reports so please don’t put your information into some random website (read here: https://www.ftc.gov/faq/consumer-protection/get-my-free-credit-report). If you go directly through the credit agencies, they will charge you.
After getting your free report, they sometimes try to up-sell you by getting you to purchase your credit score as well. There are so many free options for this (through most banks where you have an account, through credit karma as the bitches suggested, etc) so don’t waste your money.
How can I get a free copy of my credit report?
Introducing Miss World 2019: JAMAICA 🇯🇲
If you’re not celebrating me like Ms Nigeria is going for Ms Jamaica, I don’t want you...
Escorts Beware
The US is continuing to ramp up efforts against sex work 😐 The three website they’re heavily investigating now are Eros (which has been a long time coming), Rubmaps (associated with the scandal with Robert Kraft, the NFL Patriots owner), and EroticMonkey. Apparently all three have been connected to some European sex lord that owns, controls, or has otherwise profited from sex sites in the US and Europe.
A year after U.S. authorities closed Backpage.com, the biggest player in the online sex-for-sale industry, investigators are focused on thre
(Article: https://www.wsj.com/articles/after-backpage-u-s-investigates-massage-escort-websites-that-now-dominate-market-11568548800)
Anyway, be safe ladies.
Recent Happenings
I went to Vegas for work again. Good trip but not the same as before. I’ve only stayed at the Wynn in Vegas and this time, my conference was in a different hotel. Decent but not nearly as nice. I think that other trip really elevated my expectations.
Anyway, I visited a friend who lives in the region and at some point, she mentioned a site that I HAD to check out: seeking.com (SA). She said with my personally/ expectations, I could probably find the kind of man I want with one of those SDs. Even if I “didn’t want to give any sugar.” I was like, “ohh really? Wow! What do you think that’s like?” 😂 Over the course of the weekend, she kept mentioning it too 🤣
Then today, one of my best guy friends asked if I could come visit (cross country) and help him sort some stuff out. He’d pay 60% of my flight and host me. I said yes immediately. Even if he didn’t offer to pay for part of my flight, I would have agreed. Mind you, I can get a flight for $400/$500 easy, especially if I’m not flying during a holiday. Below is his response.
I love my friends. I love that they know me so well. I love that they grow with my expectations. This is a friend that used to feel offended when I told him he had a responsibility to man up and pay for dates, in full, every time. He didn’t like to hear it but he started to pay for dates with his girls. Now, he usually comes correct. Even for me. He buys me little things, sends me small presents, always offers to pay for something. And we’re only friends. Although admittedly, I used to try to get with him all the time. Something about him always turned me on. I’m over it now but it’s still in the back of my head. I like to see how he’s evolving. Once he starts making a higher salary than me, I’ll see how much he’ll flow with my waves.
Last night in LA for work. I feel like I should be freestyling in my hotel bar but I’m concerned I’ll see my actual clients down there. The last thing I need is to get caught up haha. Maybe I’ll see if there’s anything notable happening on Tinder or Bumble
Finally downloaded MrNumber. Searched for a POT that I’m going on a date with tomorrow and saw “Small dick. Cheap as hell. He’s a hobbit”. Got me like 😂 I’m still going to give it a shot and in my head I’m like…
Let’s see how this M&G goes. At least it’s at a restaurant I’ve been wanting to try.
Follow-up: I enjoyed the food/ restaurant and he was cool enough but during the course of the conversation after I eluded to appreciating men that invest in me, he said some shit like “I can’t give you riches but I have had many life experience that I can share.” I.e I won’t give you any money but I’ll tell you how I’ve spent mine to enhance my own life...
I didn’t react in the moment because I still needed him to put me in a cab home but the next day, I politely ended it explaining that while I would love to hear about his life experiences, I also wanted someone who would invest in mine. I’m a strong believer in “when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” He told me that wasn’t going to be him and I believed him. Don’t be mad at me.
Apparently my language triggered him which led to the below:
He is literally 30 years older than me. I don’t understand why he would think I don’t want to benefit from him as much as he wanted to benefit from my beauty, youth, and company. Ohh you thought because I was articulate and well-educated I would want to date your old as for free? I wish these men realized that SWs are among the smartest and sharpest women they’d ever meet. I should have canceled as soon as a saw that MrNumber review 😂
Finally downloaded MrNumber. Searched for a POT that I’m going on a date with tomorrow and saw “Small dick. Cheap as hell. He’s a hobbit”. Got me like 😂 I’m still going to give it a shot and in my head I’m like...
Let’s see how this M&G goes. At least it’s at a restaurant I’ve been wanting to try.
How do you get men to wanting to care for you and help you? It doesn't matter what kind of men I meet, bf/pot/sub they don't want to give me money, they don't want to give me any gifts and they don't want to help with anything. And I don't get it? It's like I am so strong that I should manage by myself. But I never do the whole independent woman thing, on the contrary I really try to be feminine, I ask for help, I show appreciation when they do things for me etc. What am I doing wrong?
You are either picking up men in the wrong place or your “look/appearance” is not giving off a “kept woman” vibe. You get men wanting to take care of you by looking and acting as if you’re already being taken care of.
You have to look like it, act like it.You have to eat, sleep and breathe it. You have to EMBODY it.
Giving you a “script” or phrases to say doesn’t always work because certain words don’t have the same effect on every man.
For instance some guys love damsels in distress. (aka “captain save-a-hoe” types). If you approach them with a tragic, sad story they’ll leap at the opportunity to help you.
But every guy isn’t like that.
Some guys love the bossy, princess type. They love a girl that’s a bit demanding, bitchy and takes no shit.
Both of these guys will “keep” you. But they will do it for different reasons. And if you try to use a “bossy princess tactic” on a “captain save-a-hoe” type it’s not going to work. He’s going to get turned off and will probably cut off contact with you. Or he’ll pretend as if he’ll assist you and then never come through.
Words are not the most effective way to IMPLANT the idea into a man’s head that you want to be kept.
Most people don’t really hear you when you speak. Everyone has “selective hearing”. They hear what they want to hear.
So what do you do?
You show them better than you can tell them.
It’s 80% of how you present yourself and 20% of what you say.
Haven’t you ever made up your mind about someone or made a judgement about a person before they even opened their mouth to speak?
Your words merely back up your actions.
You have to dress like a kept woman. This doesn’t mean you have to be draped in Chanel but you do need to be put together. Looking put together is SO fucking important. Look at how the “rich women” in your area are dressing and presenting themselves. Are you doing the same? Everyone has their own unique style but the common theme is that they are put together from head to toe. Be honest. Are you doing this? ALL of this? Hair. Eyebrows. Skin. Teeth. Makeup. Posture. Perfume. Properly fitting outfit. Manicured nails. Quality handbag and shoes (it doesn’t have to be designer).
When you look like a million bucks you attract a million bucks. There are quite a few videos on YouTube about how to look expensive on a budget. Watch them and take notes.
You have to act like a kept woman. How would you act if you were already being sponsored? What would your hobbies be? Where would you go? What would you do?
Begin incorporating it into your lifestyle. And don’t think it has to be expensive either. It costs absolutely nothing to walk around Saks Fifth Avenue.
Now where are you finding your men?
I know you’re on a lot of online sites. I urge you to diversify and begin freestyling and to also change the pictures that you’re using. If they’re head-shots or body-shots of you in some random location or in front of a plain background/wall they’ve got to go.
A picture is worth a thousand words and you need to set your narrative:
A picture of you in an upscale hotel lobby.
A picture of you in front of a high end department store (with the name of the store in the picture with a shopping bag in your hand)
A picture of you in an expensive restaurant at the bar with a pretty drink.
A picture of you holding a bouquet of flowers, box of chocolates, etc.
And when a man sees that type of profile with those kinds of pictures, he’s not going to think “wow she’s an independent woman getting it on her own”. He’s going to think “there’s some man paying for all of that and if I want to get with her, I’m going to have to do the same.”
And THEN when you start to ask for things, he wont be surprised. But you have to set this precedent from the very beginning.
He doesn’t want to give you what you want? Thankyou, NEXT.
I personally like to start off like this:
2 Dates at a NICE restaurant (do not accept drink dates).
Then I start asking for gifts. Maybe a dress for our next date. Or 2 dozen roses. Or chocolate truffles. Nothing too crazy as long as it sends the message that I am a luxury, I like luxury things and you will spend your money when you’re around me.
It doesn’t matter if he’s a captain save a hoe type, bossy princess type or something else. NO MAN should have a problem with buying gifts for his lady.
He has a problem with it? THANKYOU NEXT.
After a few gifts, I ask for a small bill to be paid. Then I keep working my way up.
And do not be afraid to “act dumb”:
“What do you mean you didn’t give your past girlfriends gifts??? Didn’t you want to do something sweet for her?” *look confused* What do you mean you never took your former Mistress/Domme shopping?? I thought you liked showing your appreciation? *look confused?*What do you mean that’s all you gave your previous sugar baby?? Didn’t you want to help her out more? *LOOK FUCKING CONFUSED*
You do not have to act bitchy or demanding (unless he’s in to that)You do not have to beg or plead.You do not have to act overly sweet.
You simply say this as “matter of factly” as you can with a straight face.
He’s going to feel like an ass and is either going to cave within 24 hours or disappear out of your life.
You have to set the standard from the beginning.
And you can not waver from it. You have to be ruthless and willing to cut him off with the quickness if he will not meet your demands.
You don’t have to be mean. Just stop giving him attention.
A kept woman does not “ask”, she expects.
She expects you to take her on shopping trips.She expects you to take her dining at upscale restaurants.She expects you to take her on luxury vacations.She expects you to take care of her financially.
That is simply the “cost” of dating her.
When I look at both my successes and failures I noticed that every time I failed it was because I acted like a woman that WANTED to be a kept woman. Every time I succeeded it was because I acted like woman that IS a kept woman.
There is a difference.
This is it. No more anon questions. This answers everything!!! 😭🙏🏼🙏🏼
How to be a kept woman
Any woman who dares to suggest that it’s OK to live off a rich man is likely to be dismissed as a traitor by feminists. Yet this is exactly the lifestyle promoted in a new book by Abigail Bosanko. Though the novel is fictional, the author was ‘kept’ by her husband, an investment fund manager, in an elegant Edinburgh mews house while she wrote it. Here, we present Abigail’s guide to becoming a kept woman… KNOW WHAT YOU WANT BEFORE you even contemplate being a kept woman, know what kind of man you want. If you want an art historian or collector who works for Sotheby’s, don’t settle for a picture framer, even if he has a string of shops. Be confident - an intriguing 21st century woman with her own independent pursuits and talents. You want this man to fall in love with your beautiful mind. HAVE A SKILL Choose an unusual skill - this is intriguing and sexy. Play polo, or golf (not football - men see women who like football as spies in the camp); have an intimate knowledge of 18th and 19th century courtesans; play an instrument; learn about wine or speak an unusual language. Knowledge of food is always sensual. SPEND TIME ON YOURSELF This is something puritans disapprove of, but spending time on yourself - doing your nails, having a massage or a facial, or even just wearing your favourite perfume - is all good for your self-image and self esteem. UNDERWEAR Lingerie is psychologically revealing. If a woman is in a happy relationship she has all sorts of fabulous lingerie, but when she’s unhappy she’s got her 90-denier winter warmers, and fleecy vests, because she’s not particularly interested in sharing that part of herself. Even if you feel like 90-denier, wear something silky that makes you feel good. CLOTHES Nurture your curves like actresses Kate Winslet, Catherine Zeta Jones and Marilyn Monroe. There is nothing wrong with being a size 14 - look at Nigella Lawson. Think Forties Domestic Goddess. Wear elegant, simple, well-cut clothes, such as shawl-collared suits which hug your curves, in neutral tones. And don’t forget your heels. WHERE TO MEET The first-class lounge at the airport is perfect. Save up all your air miles and buy a club class seat to somewhere such as Paris or New York. Hope for a delay, then you will all get to know each other playing Scrabble, with endless free drinks. Fine art, furniture and jewellery auctions at the top auction houses are also perfect. WHAT KIND OF MAN? Obviously he’s got to be wealthy, but he’s also got to be discreet. Showy wealth is a definite no-no. Lots of gold jewellery shows someone who needs to be in a credit card club to feel financially confident. All a man needs is a beautiful watch, or a signet ring with the family crest. Find out where he has been on holiday. There are two types: if he has been scuba diving in the Maldives or white-water rafting in the Amazon, this shows he has money and a sense of adventure. Alternatively, cushy stays in sumptuous hotels are perfect. If he hasn’t had time for a holiday, he’s too busy to appreciate you. HIS PERSONALITY He should have an active hobby - one that shows stamina, which is vital. He should be generous, of course, and protective of you. He should be well-read and informed, reading at least one newspaper in addition to the FT. Books could be things such as Martin Amis’s Experience, or J. M. Coetzee’s Waiting For The Barbarians. DROPPING HINTS In our modern world where women are career- queens, men find this concept odd. One male friend of Abigail asked: ‘Why would an intellectual woman want to be bank-rolled?’ But when it was explained that it would allow her to follow her vocation, the concept became quite appealing. Start by saying that you would love to be able to pursue your passion as a rare book restorer/ cartoonist/script writer, but can’t afford to. He’ll be impressed and will offer to pay. HOW DO YOU KNOW HE WILL KEEP YOU? The first sign is when he offers to pay off your overdraft, then credit card bills, then suggests you don’t go in to work but spend time with him. While he’s at a business lunch he would love it if you went shopping - he will pick up the tab, of course. When it comes to this sort of arrangement, you have got to be honest, clever and sophisticated. TERMS Be bold, be daring, be honest. You need a joint bank account - you set the limit - plus your own personal savings account. He can buy you a chic mews house, a penthouse flat - or, of course, you can move into his mansion. Ask for accounts at your favourite shops. You also need treats such as manicures, pedicures, chocolates and flowers. Exotic holidays and weekend breaks are essential. SEX This is sensual, loving, tantalising sex, not you fulfilling his fantasy - not unless the fantasy is mutual. When it comes to sex, remember, curiosity comes first. With all the money you now have access to, you can change the venue as often as you like. Instead of going home, book into a five-star hotel. It will never get boring. GIFTS You should ask for gifts that are original: ‘A friend received an embroidered silk cheongsam (Mandarin gown) from her lover who was travelling in China.’ Expect a single, beautiful pearl, elegant jewellery, a race-horse, £1,000 worth of Lottery tickets or rare books such as the original Les Liaisons Dangereuses. HOLIDAYS At least four times a year, not counting short breaks. Abigail’s husband often takes her to a romantic hotel near the Sorbonne in Paris. Think skiing in Aspen, scuba diving on the Barrier Reef, a trip to the Galapagos or Madagascar, sunbathing in St Lucia. He might have his own private yacht, so cruise the Caribbean or the islands in the Mediterranean. WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR TIME Write that novel that’s said to lurk inside us all - Abigail wrote hers; finish your art history degree. Get to know the best restaurants and cafes so you can lunch at length with your friends. Afternoons-should be reserved for shopping or pampering, and evenings with him. WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR (HIS) MONEY It goes without saying that you will revamp your wardrobe. Keep champagne, chablis, caviar, organic bread, bacon and quails’ eggs in your fridge. A bit of philanthropy is essential, too, so set up covenants to your favourite charities and feel charitable towards bone fide beggars - give more to buskers and pavement artists, because they are at least trying. Send your family on their dream holiday, and treat your man to a surprise trip on Concorde or the best seats at a major international sporting event. WHAT TO SAY TO CRITICS Always keep a bottle of champagne in the fridge for your disapproving female friends. They will be extremely envious, so kill them with kindness. Never apologise about your chosen lifestyle. Don’t brag about it either - it’s not dignified. END IT You can insist on an expiry date - a year and a day maybe - but you decide when. Do not return your gifts. When it ends, put all your overflow cash into an ISA and go on holiday for a month. Go somewhere romantic and beautiful, and take time to think. You never know, he might follow you there and beg to keep you in a permanent arrangement. Lazy Ways To Make A Living by Abigail Bosanko, Time Warner Books, £5.99.
Read this sis
Love it
How do you get men to wanting to care for you and help you? It doesn't matter what kind of men I meet, bf/pot/sub they don't want to give me money, they don't want to give me any gifts and they don't want to help with anything. And I don't get it? It's like I am so strong that I should manage by myself. But I never do the whole independent woman thing, on the contrary I really try to be feminine, I ask for help, I show appreciation when they do things for me etc. What am I doing wrong?
You are either picking up men in the wrong place or your “look/appearance” is not giving off a “kept woman” vibe. You get men wanting to take care of you by looking and acting as if you’re already being taken care of.
You have to look like it, act like it.You have to eat, sleep and breathe it. You have to EMBODY it.
Giving you a “script” or phrases to say doesn’t always work because certain words don’t have the same effect on every man.
For instance some guys love damsels in distress. (aka “captain save-a-hoe” types). If you approach them with a tragic, sad story they’ll leap at the opportunity to help you.
But every guy isn’t like that.
Some guys love the bossy, princess type. They love a girl that’s a bit demanding, bitchy and takes no shit.
Both of these guys will “keep” you. But they will do it for different reasons. And if you try to use a “bossy princess tactic” on a “captain save-a-hoe” type it’s not going to work. He’s going to get turned off and will probably cut off contact with you. Or he’ll pretend as if he’ll assist you and then never come through.
Words are not the most effective way to IMPLANT the idea into a man’s head that you want to be kept.
Most people don’t really hear you when you speak. Everyone has “selective hearing”. They hear what they want to hear.
So what do you do?
You show them better than you can tell them.
It’s 80% of how you present yourself and 20% of what you say.
Haven’t you ever made up your mind about someone or made a judgement about a person before they even opened their mouth to speak?
Your words merely back up your actions.
You have to dress like a kept woman. This doesn’t mean you have to be draped in Chanel but you do need to be put together. Looking put together is SO fucking important. Look at how the “rich women” in your area are dressing and presenting themselves. Are you doing the same? Everyone has their own unique style but the common theme is that they are put together from head to toe. Be honest. Are you doing this? ALL of this? Hair. Eyebrows. Skin. Teeth. Makeup. Posture. Perfume. Properly fitting outfit. Manicured nails. Quality handbag and shoes (it doesn’t have to be designer).
When you look like a million bucks you attract a million bucks. There are quite a few videos on YouTube about how to look expensive on a budget. Watch them and take notes.
You have to act like a kept woman. How would you act if you were already being sponsored? What would your hobbies be? Where would you go? What would you do?
Begin incorporating it into your lifestyle. And don’t think it has to be expensive either. It costs absolutely nothing to walk around Saks Fifth Avenue.
Now where are you finding your men?
I know you’re on a lot of online sites. I urge you to diversify and begin freestyling and to also change the pictures that you’re using. If they’re head-shots or body-shots of you in some random location or in front of a plain background/wall they’ve got to go.
A picture is worth a thousand words and you need to set your narrative:
A picture of you in an upscale hotel lobby.
A picture of you in front of a high end department store (with the name of the store in the picture with a shopping bag in your hand)
A picture of you in an expensive restaurant at the bar with a pretty drink.
A picture of you holding a bouquet of flowers, box of chocolates, etc.
And when a man sees that type of profile with those kinds of pictures, he’s not going to think “wow she’s an independent woman getting it on her own”. He’s going to think “there’s some man paying for all of that and if I want to get with her, I’m going to have to do the same.”
And THEN when you start to ask for things, he wont be surprised. But you have to set this precedent from the very beginning.
He doesn’t want to give you what you want? Thankyou, NEXT.
I personally like to start off like this:
2 Dates at a NICE restaurant (do not accept drink dates).
Then I start asking for gifts. Maybe a dress for our next date. Or 2 dozen roses. Or chocolate truffles. Nothing too crazy as long as it sends the message that I am a luxury, I like luxury things and you will spend your money when you’re around me.
It doesn’t matter if he’s a captain save a hoe type, bossy princess type or something else. NO MAN should have a problem with buying gifts for his lady.
He has a problem with it? THANKYOU NEXT.
After a few gifts, I ask for a small bill to be paid. Then I keep working my way up.
And do not be afraid to “act dumb”:
“What do you mean you didn’t give your past girlfriends gifts??? Didn’t you want to do something sweet for her?” *look confused* What do you mean you never took your former Mistress/Domme shopping?? I thought you liked showing your appreciation? *look confused?*What do you mean that’s all you gave your previous sugar baby?? Didn’t you want to help her out more? *LOOK FUCKING CONFUSED*
You do not have to act bitchy or demanding (unless he’s in to that)You do not have to beg or plead.You do not have to act overly sweet.
You simply say this as “matter of factly” as you can with a straight face.
He’s going to feel like an ass and is either going to cave within 24 hours or disappear out of your life.
You have to set the standard from the beginning.
And you can not waver from it. You have to be ruthless and willing to cut him off with the quickness if he will not meet your demands.
You don’t have to be mean. Just stop giving him attention.
A kept woman does not “ask”, she expects.
She expects you to take her on shopping trips.She expects you to take her dining at upscale restaurants.She expects you to take her on luxury vacations.She expects you to take care of her financially.
That is simply the “cost” of dating her.
When I look at both my successes and failures I noticed that every time I failed it was because I acted like a woman that WANTED to be a kept woman. Every time I succeeded it was because I acted like woman that IS a kept woman.
There is a difference.
PLEASE. want MORE…for YOURSELF 🤦🏾♀️
A guy on my vanilla page asked, “How much does your man need to make an hour?” 🤡
I responded: “How many businesses does he need to own?” (I didn’t get much love at all from this response.) 🤣 The girls that barely cared what their partner made or said a very low hourly rate, got mad love. 🙃😂 *bless their hearts*
That mentality is so contagious…Some of the WOMEN responded with $10-$20 an hr 🤦🏾♀️ Like seriously, when are we going to realize that that’s not significant money with today’s cost of living. LIVING not existing. Believe it or not…The more wealth you accumulate the better of a person you become, or SHOULD become. If you want to keep/grow that wealth you have to figure out how to be a much better person, so I suggest you start there before even thinking about accumulating wealth. REAL wealth. 🤑
LIKE SERIOUSLY, just as much as you want the best for yourself. Your partner needs to strive for the best as well. And I’m sorry, rationalizing with these complacent bums saying $10-$20 an hour is not gonna make you a happy wife with a happy life.
I’m done with my vanilla life for a while 🤦🏾♀️
No wet a$$ and dry bank accounts, PLEASE!
$20/hr? That’s less than $42,000 a year. He’d need to work just shy of 100hrs a week to break 6 figures. I couldn’t do it.
Understanding Freestyling
It’s obvious that the bowl is somewhat over-saturated, particularly on sugaring sites, with salts and salt babies - and thus, the proposed solution to finding generous men and procuring effective arrangements is freestyling and meeting these men in person, rather than online. Despite freestyling being praised as the new way of sugaring, there seems to be confusion on what exactly it is and what exactly to do when you’re at high-class establishments.
The most common definition appears to be going to high-class restaurants, clubs, and places where “rich people frequent”, looking as though you belong there, and then having a rich man approach you or vice- versa, but it seems as though this method is becoming outdated. As the sugar bowl has become more popularized as journalists and college students try to capitalize on this sensation, the richest men and ideal targets are skeptical. If you’re on one of the many establishments of Wall Street, Capitol Hill, or downtown LA, you’ll hear hedge fund managers, bankers, and trust fund babies talk about avoiding gold diggers when picking up women - and they’ve learned to tell the signs: expensive, attractive, well-dressed women sitting alone, waiting to be approached by men. Moreover, the wealthiest men generally will not approach women if they are strangers they don’t know. Such developments call for a new approach in freestyling, which is not to say the old one should be completely abandoned, but rather that it no longer produces the level of success that it used to.
If you’re looking for genuinely rich men (especially not just new money, or those who think that because they have a $100K salary, they’re rich), then the way of entering arrangements is through networking - which is not just meeting these men at wealthy establishments, but entering and mingling with their social circles. If you’re serious about this life and are looking to enter the upper class, become a socialite, or become a trophy wife, then nailing this skill is very important. The best arrangements, the most generous men, and the most valuable services I’ve acquired have always been through men that I was introduced to through social circles or a friend. Example: I have a male acquaintance that I was introduced to by a mutual friend, and when it was obvious there was chemistry, he introduced me to his other friend, a trust fund baby, and together with two other girls we went on a weekend trip to the trust fund baby’s lakeside house, complete with a jacuzzi, jet skis, and tubing. His net worth/income is impressive for his age (one year older than me), but isn’t enough for me to pursue a physical arrangement with him. However, he works in finance and has a knack for investment, and we’ve entered an agreement where he invests my money and keeps 20% of the investment, but over a year he’s nearly doubled the thousands of dollars I originally gave him to investment. You’ll see this through practice as well: how did Prince Harry and Prince William meet their current wives? Through their social circles and current friends. You’ll understand why rich men tend to date rich women, isn’t necessarily because they have a preference for rich women or that rich women are more attractive (though there may be correlation) but rather because in their social circles that is the kind of woman they’re often introduced to. When you’re wealthy and powerful, it’s not in your interest to talk to most people - because naturally, people will be coming to you. In this way, social circles act as a means of both protecting their wealth and status and separating the cream of the crop to include those that are attractive, have social approval, and have a lifestyle fit with these men for ideal romantic partners.
So how do you ‘break’ into such circles? How do you make the results of freestyling become a reality?
•First, if you’re just starting out or are looking for an allowance, it will be relatively difficult to find the *exact* results that you want. You can see from billionaires or men renown from their wealth, they take care of women who aren’t necessarily at their financial level, but have stability and some income of their own. This makes them more attractive because for super wealthy men, they are used to groupies/women throwing themselves at them, so when they encounter someone who is attractive, interested in them, yet has a level of financial independence, this poses a challenge and makes them more likely to invest in you for sponsorship, SGF, or trophy wife, whichever you wish.
•That being stated, I encourage freestyling from the very beginning, since even on standard dating platforms there’s an inundation of time-wasters and irrelevant folks who try to capitalize on the beauty of a young, attractive woman. So to get started, first, you have to network. Assuming you already know how to take care of yourself and to network, the next step is finding out where the rich and successful people in your area hang out. Humans are naturally social, and so when a girl claims she cannot find worthwhile men, it must be that she’s investing time or social energy into the wrong kinds of men. Envision the kind of life or standards that you’re looking for, and delete any man who doesn’t meet these standards or contributes no use to you. This will free up space and social networking so you can pursue relationships with men who CAN invest in you. If you’re looking for men who can do more than buy you fast food and share Netflix subscriptions, delete those that do.
•Next, do some research about which social circles to join. It’s good to decide what kind of interests you have - are they political? Financial? Perhaps you’re interested in philanthropy. If you’re not sure, that’s fine and join as many as possible, and make sure they have a certain level of status or are inviting the right people, or else they will just be another waste of your time. Go to the introductory meetings and dress to impress, and make a great first impression. Introduce yourself, have a story about yourself, and make small talk, and if you’re attractive and reasonably socially-skilled, you’ll find that people are drawn to you. Once one person is interested, the rest will follow. Some women are too transparent by only mingling with the men - take great care to establish good relations with the women there, because they can put in a good and very influential word for you.
•Go to these events, meet new people, and continue going to them. Men will want to contact you and will ask for your number - you should give it, but don’t get overexcited or too eager. You have to refine through these men and ensure that they’re ones that you’d like to date or to pursue arrangements with. So contact them, be approachable, but also ensure that you present yourself as having other things going for you. You don’t have to necessarily be working but having your own savings, own assets, whether those are from yourself, your family, or another man, are important. Always, always, always have the man approach you first. If he doesn’t seem interested, never seem discouraged and just move on to the next one. Have a mentality of abundance. Next step is testing him and doing your research.
•Before doing anything, you should be able to answer the following questions (outlined in books like Ho Tactics):
-Where does he work and live?
-Is he wealthy, and if so, where does his wealth come from? (Trust fund baby, old money, self-made) What profession is he in? Does he look wealthy or is he actually wealthy?
-And most importantly, is he generous? (How much money does he drop on his hobbies, is he cheap/frugal, does he like spending money on women)
Most women get caught up in the generosity, because sadly, wealth is not equivalent to generosity. Test him by going out on a date and seeing what he proposes. Generous men tend to be quite obvious, in my opinion, and won’t show any hesitation in paying for services, calling you Ubers, or taking you on spontaneous trips and otherwise showing off their wealth. If he doesn’t seem generous, drop him immediately. If he makes any excuse that seems disingenuous, drop him immediately. If he tries to force any physical contact, drop him immediately. If he makes any complaint on spending, drop him immediately. Trust your intuition. Filter through the trash. A superior man will take his place.
•By the second date, you should already have established that you’re high-value. Be nice and pleasant, but don’t be so easily impressed. This is where he should be spending more, and you should establish the dynamics of the relationship. Hold off on physical contact until you’ve filtered through his intentions and gotten what you wanted. Some girls are confused as to whether or not they should be upfront or not, whether to ask for allowance straight up or not. It’s difficult to say, because this varies from person to person - and I would say go with what your intuition tells you and do what’s most comfortable in the persona you adopt. Maybe making up a sob story or emotional manipulation is what you’re best at. Maybe it just suits you better to be blunt. Maybe batting your eyelashes and asking to go shopping is your forte. Whatever works for you. Just make sure you establish the grounds of the relationship and get what you want before anything physical happens. Have foresight on what you want and get the money/gifts FIRST.
•Next is… upgrade. Play the dynamics of an arrangement/relationship and see what his relationship needs are. Fulfill them. But always play the game, and never get too attached. Women may get insecure in relationships - “What if he finds someone hotter than me, younger than me, with a better body than me?” Don’t get insecure and don’t rely on male validation. Have confidence in yourself. He is with you for a reason. You can also do the exact same - there will be better men in the midst, and continuing to be desirable to check his ego is important. But in the meantime, maintaining your looks, beauty, and hobbies is important if you are dedicated to this lifestyle. If you want to date vanilla, fine, go ahead, but if you’re looking to escort/sugar/sell pussy.. whatever you want to call it… you need to consistently upgrade using the resources you’re given. Take great care to not get emotionally attached if you’re not satisfied with the lifestyle you have right now - which requires emotional discipline. Remember that there will always be richer men, hotter men, more successful men, or men who have more of all three qualities.
Love it
Spoiled Gf Tip:
Tired of Saying Mutually Beneficial?
Say you’re a traditionalist. Say you want a man to be the man in the relationship - the breadwinner, the provider.
In return you’re the loving, caring, beautiful, and all-around perfect woman. You’ll care for him, love him, and always be there. But for to you always be there, to always look beautiful, and be all-around perfect your man needs to provide for you - financially, emotionally, and of course physically (🙄🙄🙄).
Instead of demanding something mutually beneficial, demand A MAN. Watch how the tables turn when he’s forced to either comply or admit he’s not a man who’s capable…… And nothing hurts a man’s ego, pride, or manhood more 😈
Forever reblog
I like this. I’ve read it before but this really hit me.
Enjoying a slow morning in Vegas for work. My company puts me up in a deluxe resort room at a five-star hotel and gives me an expense card to ensure that I’m well taken care of while I’m traveling. When I go out, here or back home, I choose places that are highly rated and reviewed, cost-unimportant. I travel frequently and in comfort, all on my own. Why in the world would I date a man, sugar or vanilla, that can’t even meet me where I am?! I it doesn’t make any sense to me. Too many women’s expectations are literally on the floor, can’t get any lower unless you’re six feet under. No thank you. I’ll sit single before I settle.
What would you say is a good salary to ask for for a non-tech entry level job? I feel like that’s probably where I’m screwing myself over. All applications ask for a desired salary and as I have only 1 internship as professional experience and just a BA I have been asking for 30,000. I thought that was reasonable but maybe I should be asking for less?
Honeysuckle… DO NOT ASK FOR LESS THAN $30,000. This is not what’s screwing you over.
I recommend visiting GlassDoor.com and looking at average salaries for different careers and industries there. This will give you a sense of what you can expect for the kind of jobs you’re applying for.
Also, in case you haven’t figured it out by now: it’s completely shady and abhorrent for companies to ask you to apply for a job without listing a salary range. They’re wasting your time and putting you in a shitty position from which to negotiate.
What to Do When You’re Asked About Your Salary in a Job Interview
When you’re applying for a job that’s asking for “salary requirements” one thing to consider is whether this is a salaried job! A lot of non-tech entry level positions are hourly so while they are asking you for salary expectations, you may be giving the wrong information if you’re giving an annual amount. Like the bloggers suggest, look on glassdoor (and do a thorough google search) to get an idea of pay ranges, not just for the company but for equivalent jobs in other companies. If everything is pointing to an hourly salary, simply calculate how much you’d need to an hour.
Here are the assumptions:
Targeted salary: $30K a year
Weeks in a year: 52
Full-time job: 40hrs a week
So to calculate hourly wages needed to reach your goal: $30,000 (a year)/ 52 (weeks per year)/ 40 (hours per week) = $14.42 per hour
You’d need to make a minimum of $14.42/hr but of course always ask for more than the minimum you’ll need.
But really, the salary conversation shouldn’t be happening on the application. It’s bad form. I’d recommend writing “Negotiable” so they aren’t excluding you before you even have a chance to wow them. Once you get an interview, impress then and make them want you. Don’t even ask about salary during the interview (with all the research you did, you should know the range). When it’s finally is time to talk money (the final round in a series of interviews or after you receive an offer letter), they should always give the first number then let the negotiations begin.
Just a final note: Salary negotiations for an entry level job in a non-tech field is different than in a field where you need an advanced degree or where you already have experience. You have more negotiating power in those circumstances. So if you find yourself fresh out of university (or HS), with no real-life experience, and the only thing holding you back is too high of a salary expectation (and I mean if you are told this explicitly by a potential employer), consider compromising a little in that regard in order to gain some experience.
Uber
I’m so embarassed…..i need help singing up for uber. Do I just sign up and put in a CC? Is it pretty intuitive to use? Any tips? I never used it
Haha this is extra cute. The innocent ignorance among so much knowledge and experience. It’s like my travel daddy (who has become my professional mentor/ advisor) and English, especially if we’re having a heated discussion about something. His English is amazing but it’s his third language and so if I use a word he doesn’t recognize, you see his attempts at translation flash across his face and a small smile will creep up. I’ll immediately start laughing, pause the argument to explain the word, then pick right back up on that word to make sure he understands in context.
One of the things he loves about me is my “rich use of language” and that I don’t tone it down for him. He says all his other American friends will only use the simplest words to make sure he understands. I’m always offended on his behalf - I ask him to never dumb down his business acumen and I’ll never dumb down my words.
Anyway, I love when men who know so much about something I’m learning, get stumped on things that are second nature to me. Especially when they don’t let their toxic masculinity become aggressive because they don’t know something - it’s endearing.