“ye” or “ya” for “you” (also consider “yer” for “you’re/your”)
google scottish slang, most list also explain the words and how to use them. Use Them
tae/ta/te = to/too
does a word end in ing? (ie, killing, filling, etc) REMOVE THE G, replace it with an apostrophe. for example: killing = killin’
occasionally replace “i” (as in ‘i went to the store’) with ‘ah’ (so it becomes ‘ah went to the store’) because thats how its pronounced in a scottish accent. can also do “ah’m” instead of “i’m” or “ah’ve” instead of “i’ve”
i watched like three youtube tutorials on how to do a scottish accent and they explain a lot of how it works and stuff, very useful. fun fact i can now do a scottish accent
thats pretty much all i got for you, accents are actually really fun to write once youve got a hang of it
Dog With No Teeth by @/gloomwitchwrites. An absolute gem I love it. She never disappoints!
Creative Liberties by @/unseaworthy. I'm a bit behind with the chapters because of exams but the premise is so good and the writing is chef's kiss.
Splinter by @/bitterrfruit. Whatever she does is to die for. Impeccable writing, Simon Riley feels so real I believe he actually exists and she's met him.
Simon x Legally Blind!Reader by @/siriuslysmutty. Cutest! I mean—CUTEST!!! I love their dynamic and Simon's characterization.
A Hand For a Hand by @/beebymoonlight. Knight!Simon made my knees weak. Three parts with extremely good political world building for such a short fic. Reader is fucking badass.
This piece for Kinktober by the once @/tobeholyistobeempty and now @/howyoulovelikeweaponskill. Really hot. I read Simon's dialogue with his voice—I love when my brain does that.
Refugee by @/danceofthesevenveils. One of my fav Simon fics ever!
These come to mind. If you'd like to read something else, I bookmark my favs on AO3! Have a good read!
"Theo! I wanna write stories of my favourite fictional characters fighting for their lives, solving mysteries, surviving an apocalypse, finding love, and getting railed into next Tuesday—but I’m not confident in my English since it's not my first language.
What can I do?"
Well—
Have a seat, my sweet, and let cranky ol' Theo take you on a journey to reach (almost) unshakable confidence in your second (third? fourth? fifth? damn 🧐) language.
I’m going to assume everyone here has had a reasonable smattering of English ever since they were young, because yes—I just know that if you’re here and English isn’t your first language, you’ve been studying it ever since you were a kid.
However, if you haven’t, let me introduce you to:
Step 0. Get started!
English grammar is relatively easy, especially when compared to other languages (i.e. Italian grammar is a nightmare, Spanish grammar is a nightmare, French grammar is… my sleep paralysis demon).
There are several sites you can consult to train your English, and the most well-rounded one (I used to steal exercises from it when I helped my niece with her English homework) is BBC Learning English.
It has videos, subjects are divided into units and each unit has straightforward exercises that are promptly corrected.
Unfortunately, most sites have a paywall.
To keep training your English, Duolingo is still an incredibly effective app. It’s free, packed with exercises, and you can start at any level you want!
Don’t make the owl mad and keep training, even if it's only a handful of minutes a day. Take notes on a notepad as you go, and review them as you would during a normal school lecture. In other words: study the thing!
Step 1. Live English-ly
Go on about your day, but do it in English.
Consume media like you’re a black hole sucking the Englishness out of everything around you.
Watch films in English.
Start easy, and choose animated features—they’re often directed to younger audiences hence the English they use is simple and direct. Put subtitles in your first language initially, and when you think you’ve gained enough confidence, switch to English Dub and English Sub.
Take notes of words you like, and idioms—hell, those work like a charm and make you look more confident in the language!
Keep your phone nearby and type in anything new, or jot it down on paper, on a napkin, wherever—as long as you store it somewhere safe for future reference.
Read books and fics in English
It doesn’t matter if the writer’s first language isn’t English, because you can still learn from anything.
If you don’t know a word, don’t skim over it even if you understand the meaning from the context. Look up the translation online and put it down somewhere you can easily refer to when writing!
When you feel confident enough, instead of searching for:
“XXX translation in XYZ language”,
look for:
“XXX meaning”.
This latter passage is important, because, more often than not, English words can change their meaning based on the context.
Example: “Funny”
“This is a funny joke” = This joke makes you laugh;
“My stomach feels funny” = Your stomach is not being tickled, but there’s something wrong with your stomach.
Read the news in English.
This will help you develop a more formal language, allowing you to absorb concepts that aren't normally found in a fic/movie/book. Not only that, but the structure of a journalistic article can help you with the formatting.
The main goal of the news is to give you information that is straight to the point. Most newspapers articles have the best formatting.
Paragraphs are direct and succinct; they contain the information you’re looking for and keep you focused.
That’s what you want to do with your audience: feed intel that keeps them fastened to your story, bit by bit. Paragraph by paragraph.
Step 2. 🎶 MUSIC, MUSIC, MUSIC 🎶
Listen to music in English, but not only for the vibe.
The wonderful thing about music is that singers don’t follow the rules: they’ll sing with their accent if they like (Stormzy, Hozier, Little Simz), or they’ll change where the accent falls on a word just to make it fit the melody.
Catch the words, try to understand the lyrics without reading through them, and then check them out later.
This is a good, fun way to train your ear and learn new words, while also 1) healing your soul because music is beautiful, and 2) having a good fucking time.
Step 3. Podcasts & YouTube videos
While many platforms offer free podcasts specifically designed for learning English, those created for other purposes are another fun way to train your ear and, above all, learn slang.
Now, as a Call of Duty fanfiction aficionado, I always strive to make my British men as British as can be. The British-est of them all.
I watch British YouTubers, I listen to British podcasters, watch movies made in the UK with British actors, and I listen to British artists and British music.
Do the same thing if you’re looking for a specific accent or dialect!
I understand that most YouTubers end up Americanizing themselves due to the dominance of American media, but you’d be surprised by how many keep their roots intact instead!
Step 4. Talk to yourself
Yes you read right.
Your first language isn’t English? We do not care in this household.
What you wanna do is speak it daily. Talk to yourself, baby. Train that pronunciation.
Pretend you're Sherlock Holmes when you're looking for that thing you lost in the house—bonus if you add "Elementary, my dear Watson" if your pet is nearby!
Pretend you’re a cowboy and say Howdy to yourself in the mirror!
I’ll be honest with you: this is the only way I come up with dialogues.
I have entire arguments with myself in bed, and sometimes I spontaneously say something that I think would fit X character.
Man, it's cathartic too, in a way. And I always win the argument—big plus, that one.
Step 5. Don’t change to fit in
This is my favourite thing about writing.
I'm just a lil Italian lady, and Italian sentence structure is completely different from the English.
We are chatty, we talk your ear off. Our sentences are long and structured; we could fit an entire concept into a single paragraph without ever putting a period in the sentence.
English, on the other hand, is much more direct. Shorter sentences and no convolutions whatsoever.
I tried to fit in, but alas I am chatty, and while sometimes I manage, other times I simply don’t—and that’s okay.
Weave your first language and culture into your English stories—this can become your signature as a writer!
Step 6. Make mistakes
The most ancient (and hated) tip of all times is “Learn from your mistakes”.
I know, I know, I am also a perfectionist. I also go through a story at least four thousand times before I post it, and by the time I’m ready to click “Post now”, I hate it with all my guts (hell, this guide has mistakes, somewhere).
You’d be surprised how many people think differently, though
However, sometimes it will flop.
It’ll flop so hard you’ll end up wallowing in bed, ready to quit your hobby for good because you suck and that’s the only reasonable explanation.
When you’re done crying, however, sit down in front of your fic and analyze it.
Was the grammar fucked? Check it again.
Have you used a trope so niche only three people are interested in it? Well, in that case, it didn't flop, did it? It just reached a small target audience.
Are the “Trigger Warnings” too much for the majority of people to handle? Is the fic too heavy? Too light? Too weird? It's okay! Sometimes your work won't be everyone's cup of tea. Sometimes you'll be the only one who'll like that type of tea.
You’ll flop and you’ll hate yourself and other people for it.
Don’t let it consume you, don’t resent the fandom for not clicking on your story. Don't resent native speakers because you think writing is easier for them—writing is never easy.
Fucking hell, I can’t write in my first language as comfortably as I do in English.
Listen to constructive criticism—ask for constructive criticism. Learn, learn, and learn.
And if some people are mean to you, if they tell you to never write again—flip ‘em the bird.
You’re allowed to say "Fuck You" to assholes.
Step 7. Ask for help
There is a community around you, ask for help.
English is not your first language, but it is for other people.
Be mindful and polite—some people will be open to helping, others won’t, and that’s more than fair. It’s not their job to teach you, but there’s no harm in reaching out.
Literally, conversations with my British friends sometimes go like this:
Step 8. Use resources
Writing resources are all over Tumblr, and all over the rest of the Internet too.
When I don’t want to bother someone because every one of us has a real life outside of social media, the Internet can still be your friend.
These are my favourite places:
WordHippo (Thank you @/void-my-warranty, we all say in unison):
rich in synonyms categorized by meaning (much better alternative to TheSaurus)
r/AskABrit:
subreddit dedicated to questions you might have regarding the English language and life in the UK. There is a "r/AskA___" subreddit for everything, to be honest—just look for it!
The Cranky Bint’s Guide to Brit-Picking:
“A basic guide to Brit-picking your fics. It also explains some common cultural differences, and gives a list of your more basic swear words.” This is my treasure trove.
OneLook TheSaurus (Thank you @/staytrueblue, we all say in unison):
allows you to find words based on the description you give it. Wonderful tool for non-native speakers who know the concept, but lack the vocabulary!
Step 9. Read, watch, listen
Writing is grammar, true.
Writing is beautifully constructed sentences that flow like water beneath your eyes and fill you with emotions you never knew were possible.
But writing is also substance.
Think of your imagination as a car—you gotta give it fuel, baby, or it won’t go anywhere.
Your mind can take you to every nook and cranny of the world—the one you know and the ones you don’t—but it won’t get far if you don’t explore the possibilities.
Read books in any language, watch movies in any language, observe life happening around you.
Look at yourself, too.
You are a story, already.
Pick bits and pieces of your life and place them in a character. Remember conversations that tore the heart out of your chest, or those that tickled you just right.
There’s a whole world around you waiting to inspire you. Use it!
Step 10. Have fun, goddamnit!
Theo, I just wrote the most disgusting piece of smut/gore/whatever of my entire life in a fugue state what do I do?
Did you have fun?
Yes
GOOD. Others will have fun reading it, too.
Don’t be afraid. You’re using a damn alias, for fuck’s sake—and so are the people reading your work!
This is your chance to be your unabashed self—but always be kind and mindful to other writers and your readers.
Have fun, pour it all out, and share it with the world.
Enjoy this.
It's a hobby that not only helps you overcome language insecurities, but also uncovers parts of yourself you never knew were there.
Now go, my sweet. You are ready. I say, placing my hand over your head in blessing
Write your heart out, tell your stories, and enjoy the ride.
