Hail And Well Met, My Dude

Here’s another TAZ side blog for your casual enjoyment and/or undying obsession

[transsouthernpansy]

[Image description: an image of Garfield’s head on a blue background. Underneath is a caption which reads “You are not immune to the McElroy dialect”, but the last three words of the sentence are in a different font and have clearly been edited in with MS paint. End image description.]

Pride flag for when you listened to too much McElroy content and now you talk Like That (a fruit of me and @spacemancharisma‘s conversations)

[taakoismyheart]

relistening to the MBMBaM back catalogue and it’s wild how much legit advice the McElbois used to give

[relatablephotosofjustinmcelroy]

[taakoismyheart]

Nothing can convince me that this isn’t just Kravitz and Barry on the job

[taakoismyheart]

“Oh hella, hella wrath. Yeah definitely.” -Lup

[asianartiste]

lucretia

[kravkalackin]

Taako is eight years old, and for the first time in his life he doesn’t feel completely alone. He’s living with his aunt, and he’s learning how to cook, and for once he feels happy.

(Taako is eight years old and he’s never been alone. He’s always had Lup by his side, and now is no different.)

He’s twelve, and he figures that’s old enough to travel by himself. He joins merchants and caravans and circuses. He offers to cook, finds any way to make himself useful, to make sure he won’t be thrown out on the streets. He gets very good at staying out of sight and out of mind. He’s alone, and every time he’s alone he’s scared, and he’s not sure why.

(Taako is twelve and he and Lup decide to run away together. There’s safety in numbers, and every time Lup wanders off Taako is terrified. He tells her they have to stick together, to watch each other’s back.)

Taako is one hundred and twenty two, and he can’t think of a single damn thing he’s done with his life.

(Taako is one hundred and twenty two, and he and Lup have been working and studying for years. They fucking did it, they got into the IPRE, they’re going to explore the planes, and they’re going to do it together.)

He stops keeping track of time, of the years, of anything. It blends together into a fog and for the life of him, he can’t bring himself to give a shit.

(A hundred years pass, each one meticulously written down and remembered. The faces of people left behind blur, but not the memories of his family. They’re a family now, their crew, and no matter what the cost, they’re going to get through this hell.)

Taako is still one hundred and twenty two. That doesn’t feel right, but he’s never been all that bright.

(None of them had aged a day during their voyage, but it feels like it’s catching up now. As they watch the wars. As they search for Lup. As everything they worked so hard on crumbles around them.)

He wakes up one day, sobbing. That’s not like him, he can’t think of the last time he cried. It feels like his heart’s been carved out of his chest, he feels numb. Eventually he feels too numb to cry anymore, and he pushes it all to the back of his mind.

(He killed his best friend. His family is gone. He’s truly alone for the first time in his life, and he is so fucking scared.)

Taako is still one hundred and twenty two, and even though that doesn’t feel right it doesn’t matter. He has a cooking show. He’s finally fucking made something of himself, and for the first time in over a century, he’s happy.

(He’s restless and hallow and petty. He can’t bring himself to care, and it was never this bad before. He doesn’t like this new him.)

He’s one hundred twenty six, and the tentative life he built up for himself crashes and burns in one night. He doesn’t know what happened. He never meant to kill all those people. It was a mistake, but the police would never believe him, so all he can do is run.

(He’s watched tragedies far beyond this one before. Despite that it still hurts. Still stings to his core.)

He spends years hiding, until he meets two other adventurers. He’s not sure why but he likes them. Likes them enough to stick with them all the way up to the moon.

(He missed them. He missed them so fucking much it’s so good to see his family again.)

The relics are horrible and terrifying, but for some reason it doesn’t seem to stick. It’s hard to care, even when watching the destruction first hand. It’s like the emotions slide right off like glass.

(This is all their fault. Its all their fault and for once, Taako feels connected. He cares, and he doesn’t want this world to turn to dust too. He wants to save it.)

Something is wrong, and Taako trusts no one and nothing. He never has, not really. In his mind he always knew that at the end of the day he was alone. That people would leave him. That the world wasn’t permanent.

(Taako trusts Angus to figure out what’s going on. He trusts Merle to stick with him as they work together on this. He trusts Magnus to come back. He trusts Barry’s trust in them. He trusts the voice in his head that made his heart sing and tears well up in his eyes and he doesn’t know why but he trusts them.)

Taako is one hundred and thirty two (two hundred and thirty two) and the world is ending (again) and he’s always (never) been alone.

He closes his eyes, feeling like his head is going to crack open as two lives fight for space in his mind. Slowly, slowly he climbs to his feet and raises the umbrastaff out in front of him.

“Ten…”

[motherfuckingmagicbrian]

“Ahh, Finally it’s time for battle…”

“Nope! Time to climb, idiot!”

- Beacon, being dunked on by Duck Newton (Taz Amnesty, ep 28)

[caitmayart]

You’ve got a jellyfish on you.

[josyhne]

the Twins crossing strange, deadly, beautiful worlds together.

[rumseyrums]

the gangs all here! finally did a collection of everyone together, as i had planned for a while now. <3 gonna do something similar for the amnesty folks too.

series 1 - balance - ipre ; barry ; lup ; davenport ; lucretia ; taako ; merle ; magnus

[valtsv]

i dont have “delusions of grandeur” i AM grand and powerful and very, very sexy and you all just have to accept that

[taakoismyheart]

Art by Carey Pietsch

[linktoo-doodles]

new vid!! here is some concept art and unused frames below the cut:

Keep reading

[taakoismyheart]

Taakitz, is that you?

[incorrect-zone-quotes]

Lucretia: I need fifty words to describe birds visually. Let me know what words come up when you think of how birds look. I'm just gonna start a count, I guess.

Magnus: Beak!

Lucretia: Oh, okay. You actually fucked up with the first one.

[thatgirlonstage]

All of the McElroys’ cultural jokes and references can make canon sense if you assume that they all refer to people and things from different planes they visited during Stolen Century. However that does also mean that even though Lucretia managed to erase Taako’s entire sister she could not destroy Tres Horny Boys’ determination to meme

It also means they all spent a decade wandering around making jokes about singers no one had heard of until they met each other

[puppetmaster55]

You’ve made Merle’s disowning by his family because of his love for Kenny Chesney like five times more funny h o w

[hustlinghelltwins]

Tres horny bois meeting each other and just realizing in amazment and awe that they all understand the same cultural references and this is why they put up with each other even though they deadass sell each other out on literally everything else for at least the first three arcs

You stick with people who get your memes no matter how horny for plants they are

[poshtearex]

Okay but can you imagine how frustrating being a wizard in dnd would be. Like. You spend so long, maybe even years, studying magic, reading books and working hard be well versed in magic and end up really smart.

Then you meet the other spellcasters and they’re just like

Cleric: I believe in God so I’m magic.

Warlock: I just had to ask cthulu for magic and they said yes.

Sorcerers: I was born with magic.

Druid: I just chilled in the forest and got magic.

Bard: I play the fiddle lmao

[they-call-me-ace]

wizard: takes months to memorize a gesture and an incantation that bends the fabric of reality

bard: doot doot magic flute